"One hell of a way to spend our honeymoon huh honey?"

Lucy laid in bed, staring out completely spacing out. She had been on bedrest for the last two weeks. Under strict orders from Negan, who she knew relayed it to the doctor, she was only allowed to walk around the apartment a little to stretch her legs, use the bathroom, and shower every other day. Besides that, she was ordered to laying in the large bed she shared with her rapist. He would wake up first thing in the morning, roll over to her side, grin, and reach over, snaking his hand underneath her shirt and roughly squeeze her breast. He hadn't tried having sex with her since she woke up. Lucy believed it was because of the baby. He would rub her stomach, talking down to it, completely adored, remarking on how safe it's daddy was going to keep it, and how much he loved it, and was going to make sure nothing went wrong. He would kiss her, traveling down to her neck before getting up and going to shower. Once he came out, smelling strongly of soap and cologne, he would grin, tell her he would be sending up one of his men to fetch her breakfast, and have the doc come check her out. As always he would brush back her bangs, kiss her, and leave. As always she would lay there, feeling as if she was playing some part in a stage play.

She would wait until one of Negan's men knocked, coming in, always never looking her in the eye, before the doc came in as well. Her blood pressure would be checked, her temperature, and she would be given food. She would go and wash up as the men waited on the sofa and chairs, making small talk, all terrified over the fact they were given the responsibility over Negan's wife. She would stay in the shower, letting the hot water roll down her skin, scrubbing until her skin was raw, and nearly bleeding. Constantly she would think of those memories, all so vivid and returning of him raping her night after night. His large hands ripping open her shirts, snapping her panties off, roughly spreading her legs, entering her hard, dry, and erect. The feeling of herself getting torn, the horrible cramps, the pain and humiliation of it all. She remembered carrying his children. His babies. How she decided she rather die than bring them into the world, and somehow, some way, she had survived, and here she was. Fate had brought them back together. It seemed as if they were destined to be together. Now here she was, trapped, a prisoner, pregnant with another one of his babies. Another one she knew had been put in her by rape. A rape he denied, a rape, she now remembered. So instead she would nod, say thank-you, lay back, eat, sleep, and think. She had a lot of thinking to do. The doctor explained she was almost three months along. He had a decent lab, but there was an even better doctor at the Hilltop. Lucy acted as if she had no idea who or what this was. Instead she listened, and the doctor explained he could treat her, but in the next two months he would want to move her to the Hilltop to get checked out. He informed this in front of Negan one evening where instantly Negan said why not bring the doctor here?

The doc looked ten times more nervous, took a deep breath, and explained very slowly that they wouldn't be able to move the equipment. that he basically had everything the Hilltop doctor had, and if he felt better he could have him brought here, but as of right now as long as Lucy stayed put, both her and the baby were fine. Before the doctor left, Lucy pretend to be looking at a stack of magazines Negan had brought in for her. She glanced over and saw Negan leaning in to the older man, and softly whispered...

"You better be right doc, if you're wrong...and anything happens to my wife or kid, I'll kill you."

The doc turned pale, nodded, muttered something and grabbed his bag before walking out. When Negan returned, Lucy was pretending to be reading up on movie stars who were long since dead. Negan smiled, rubbed her legs and told her there was nothing to worry about. A few days passed, and Lucy noticed she really wasn't sick in the morning. She had heard somewhere that was a bad sign. Instead, she kept her questions and remarks to herself. One morning, Negan pulled up a chair to Lucy. He was talking about how he had gone back to visit those people from Alexandra. How while she was resting, one of the kids from that town came here, even killing one of his men. He said his name was Carl, and he was that guy Rick's kid. He talked about how he brought him upstairs to one of the other apartments and talked with him. "Poor kid has one eye, you should see it." Lucy listened before Negan said he brought the kid back and met his baby sister and brother.

"You should see her, what an angel. If we have a girl, God I hope she takes after you and looks like that. What a cutie pie. The boy is younger, guess Rick's wife died having him. He's named Nick I think. He's cute, covered in freckles, tiny ones all across his nose. Damn Lucy, I guess I'm just baby crazy. I hope we can have ten more of em. God knows we like making em."

He grinned, before Lucy froze. Trying her hardest, she smiled before his radio went off. Tapping her a wink, he got up to the other room to answer it. Instantly Lucy laid there, clutching her sheets with her hands. Instantly she thought of what Negan had just said.

"Covered in freckles, tiny ones all across his nose..."

No, there were thousands of people covered in freckles. But now, there weren't many babies born in this area roughly around that age. Babies with freckles dancing across his tiny little nose. Lucy laid there thinking. As her memories came back, she remembered that night. How she had delivered in the cabin, bleeding, suffering from exposure, and feeling herself dying. She remembered trusting that kind couple on taking the baby, but not before she was able to look at him, laying on the floor. He was beautiful. She remembered how at the time, she couldn't remember how he came to be. How he was a product along with his twin brother from rape. How in her blurred, dying, feverish state, she just saw him as her baby.

A baby she had no memory of until she delivered. A perfect, beautiful baby, crying, and squirming in blankets stained with blood. She remembered how she had looked at him, her vision blurring, and how the only vivid thing she remembered was how all ready, just a half an hour or so old, she could tell he was going to have freckles, all dancing across his cheeks and tiny little nose. The dots were tiny, but she knew if he lived they would become darker, and more adorable. Her child had freckles, did the father had freckles? The only thing she did know, was his brother didn't have them, and hours later, she was forced to kill him after he died and returned. No, the changes were as slim as they were coming back to his bastard. No, it wasn't possible. But it was. Wasn't it? She had given the baby up so it could have a chance. Maybe that couple, who's names she couldn't seem to remember, maybe they had gone to this town. Maybe Rick knew them? But why would he lie? Was the couple still alive? There was so much she didn't know, and figured she was just grasping onto this little glimmer of hope after remembering it all. No, it wasn't possible. That wasn't her baby. It couldn't be. That night Negan fell asleep, his arms roughly wrapped around her. As she laid there, she knew she needed to see this baby, but how? Negan wasn't letting her go anywhere. She was pervious cargo. She needed to just be sure, know and put her mind to rest. Laying there, feeling Negan's breath against her, she knew she had to be patient, just like before.

The next morning...

Negan came into the bedroom anger than hell. Instantly he stormed in, rubbing his now freshly cleaned face. He paced the room, tossing his radio down onto one of the sofas, and muttered under his breath.

Lucy looked up.

"What's wrong?"

Negan shook his head.

"Oh just typical bullshit darling, looks like I'm going to have to leave for a day or so. You okay with that?"

Lucy tried her hardest to look calm, shrugging she nodded.

"Yeah sure, I mean...we're not going anywhere..."

She motioned down to her stomach, knowing she had struck the right nerve. Instantly Negan smiled and walked over, looking down at her.

"I'll make sure the doc is here, and you'll have everything you need."

"When are you leaving?"

"Few hours."

"Won't be dangerous will it?"

"No Lucy darling, it won't...besides, I got my other lady to help me..."

He reached underneath the bed, and pulled out that horrible baseball bat. Lucy stared at it, stunned that he had kept it there. She wondered on how amazing it would have felt scooping that bat up last night while he slept, raising it as he had done all that time ago to Chris, and let it fall over, and over, and over again. No, he deserved worse. Still, it showed that he trusted her, and didn't see her as a threat. He still believed she was fogged over with his lies. Believing him, that they were happily married, expecting a baby, moving on from that horrible terrible night when one baby died, and the other taken away. Yes, she would keep pretending, but she knew she needed to do three things. One was escape from here, the next find that baby, just to make sure, and three...find the best way possible to hurt him. Negan smiled, holding the bat against his shoulder as he grinned. Instantly Lucy raised an eyebrow and pointed.

"What's that?"

Negan smiled before lowering it, and admiring his baseball bat.

"Oh this, one of those assholes tries to shoot me. Almost cracked my lady in half, can you believe that?"

Lucy's eyes widened.

"Somebody tried to shoot you? I thought you had all the guns."

"Oh, they had some idiot make bullets for them, but don't you worry Lucy doll, I got him safe and sound here..."

"Let me see..."

Lucy motioned over, before taking the baseball bat and turning it over. Looking at the bullet slug dug deep between the wrapped wire, she took a deep sigh before handing it back, trying to ignore the fact this very same bat killed several people, including her Chris. Instead, she acted unphased.

"Wow...what's the person's name, I'll kill them."

Negan laughed.

"Oh, she's a pistol just like you but don't you worry. I got myself a plan. So what I need for you to do is lay back, take care of our little one, and don't worry about a thing, all right?"

Lucy nodded before feeling her heart hammer in her chest. This was happening very fast, too fast. Still, she rather do it now before she lost her nerve. Last time she waited until she was nine months pregnant with twins, and look what happened. Instead, she smiled, staring up at him, hating him so much. Negan smiled before looking around, as if somebody could hear him.

"Say, I talked to the doc...he says you're doing pretty good and it's safe for...well...you know. You wanna give me a goodbye present to hold me over?"

Lucy felt sick to her stomach. She wanted to say no, that she wasn't up to it. That she wasn't feeling good. But that might raise eyebrows. That might make him have the doc watch her closer, or not even leave. No, she needed to keep pretending, and she knew this would be the last time she would ever allow that bastard to touch her again. Smiling, she batted her eyelashes up at him, knowing how that drove him crazy. The faster they got this done, the faster he would leave. Negan smiled, dropping the bat with a hollow thud, letting it roll underneath the bed. Moments later, his leather jacket fell back, and he was undoing his belt. Lucy laid there, taking small breaths as she watched him work his fly down and climb on top of her. Minutes later, he was driving himself inside of her, huffing and puffing, making the entire bed shake. She laid there, pressed into the bedding, as he laid on top of her, being more gentle than usual. Her legs were spread as she laid, her head to the side, waiting for him to finish so it could be all over. Negan had his head buried against her shoulder, moaning before finally climaxing.

Collapsing on her, he laid still, as she felt warmth trickle down her thighs. The same warmth that had made this unwanted baby inside her now. Closing her eyes, she waited before he kissed her cheek.

"I'll be back in two days darling..."

He pulled out, and began dressing. Lucy laid back, staring up, before finally he zipped up his jacket and scooped up his bat. Smiling, he stared down at her and smiled.

"You okay?"

Lucy fixed her shirt, sitting up, wanting to scrub herself clean, feeling sick to her stomach. Looking at him, she forced a small tired smile.

"I'm fine, just tired. Tell them to leave me be for the rest of the night, I just wanna sleep and they keep disturbing me. I'll radio down in the morning when I need them."

"You sure?"

"Yeah, I just wanna rest...please be careful Negan...okay?"

She knew this was just enough to make him happy. Instead, he smiled, leaned down and kissed her, before gently squeezing her hand.

"Two days at the most, I'll be back."

Lucy nodded, before she felt tears begin to form in her eyes, she tried so hard to make them go away, but they were still there despite all the risks. Instead, she couldn't help it. Instantly Negan frowned, seeing this.

"What's wrong?"

Lucy roughly wiped her eyes, sitting up, fixing the blankets.

"I...I'm just going to miss you."

Negan smiled warmly, sitting on the edge of the bed. Looking at her, for just a glimmer of a moment, she saw the man he could have been before all this madness. He reached over, gently cupping the side of her face, looking nothing like the animal who had raped her night after night in that dirty dark R.V. Instead he smiled, and reminded her he would be back as soon as possible. Smiling, she nodded, really crying because she knew this was it. She had allowed herself twice to be taken by him. Never again. This was the last time she would ever be touched by him again, she swore it, and deep down inside knew how to hurt him the worst. He kissed her one last time, brushed back her hair, and told her as soon as they came back, they were going to pick out names. Smiling, she squeezed his hand, watched him get up, and leave. Once she was alone, she covered her mouth, stiffening a sob.

Later...

Dressed in jeans, a black T-shirt, and boots, she tied her hair back tightly, tucked one of Negan's handguns into the back of her jeans that he kept under the sofa, and grabbed a knife. Checking herself in the mirror, she knew it was now or never. If somebody tried to stop her, she would have to kill them, simple as that. Taking a deep breath she opened the door and snuck out. Luckily, they must have followed Negan's orders, since nobody in the hour following him leaving had come up to check on her. Instead, she snuck out carefully like a thief in the night. She rode the elevator down, heart pounding, waiting for someone to stop her and see. Instead, oddly enough, there was nobody around. Once she reached the bottom floor, she quickly walked down the dark hallway and saw an emergency exit. Holding her breath, she pushed through the door, and walked out into the night air.

Nearly stumbling, she looked around, and saw guards further down from the fence. She knew a way out without being seen. Those few times Negan took her out target practicing, she had seen where they were stationed, and where they would look. Keeping her head down, she continued walking, and saw that the few people passing, most likely workers, heading towards where they were stationed. Nobody stopped, nobody looked at her, instead she kept walking as if she belonged. She knew if she had to use her gun, she would. Instead, less than ten minutes later, she had slipped out. Hurrying, she ran towards the fields, knowing as long as she stayed away from the main road there wouldn't be any guards. Hurrying as fast as she could, she refused to look back. Instead, she knew if they stayed away from town, and continued North she would be okay. Running, feeling the cool night air hit her, pure engird racing through her as she continued running, straight towards the tree line. After a few minutes she had entered the woods, and collapsed to her knees. Falling down hard, catching her breath, she never felt so good before in her entire life. The odds were against her, but she had been able to slip away completely unnoticed. Somehow, Negan's precious pregnant wife wasn't being watched, and had gotten away. She was free. Kneeling down, taking large shaken breaths. Thin moonlight was spilling in through the tops of the trees. A wind had picked up, and for once everything seemed so vivid, so clear, so strong. The smell of the soil and dirt. The cool wind hitting her hot face, the dim shadows of the trees and branches. All of it was here because she was alive. Either tonight or early tomorrow the doc would come in to check, and see she was gone. She very well knew she might have cost some people their life's, but she couldn't think of that. There wasn't much time, and she had a lot of ground to cover. Negan would be altered whenever he was, and they would begin searching. She knew she would be damned if she ever allowed this to happen again. Looking down at her flat stomach, she signed. She knew this wasn't this child's fault. Just like her other two children, conceived by rape, having no business existing. Her fingers slid to her flat stomach, and sighed.

"I'm sorry..."

She knew this was the only way. Closing her eyes and tilting her head back, she allowed a helpless sob to travel up her throat. Snapping her eyes tighter she thought of Chris. The kind man who had helped her originally get out of the city, the same one she had gone to, which seemed like a million years ago, back when she was still just a child. She remembered going to his tent, asking if he would make love to her, how she wanted him to be her first. Instead, like a true gentleman he kindly sent her back on her way. She remembered him kneeling beside her, and how that monster had killed him.

"I'll make him pay Chris. I promise."

She rocked back and forth, before finally opening her eyes. Wiping her tears, her face then crumpled. She wasn't sad anymore, she wasn't hurt, or scared. She was angry. Her eyes glaring, she slowly rose to her feet. Behind her she heard a low moaning sound. Looking over her shoulder, she saw a walker, slowly limping in her direction. It appeared to be a middle aged man, half his face rotted away. Lumbering over, the creature groaned before Lucy slowly slid the knife out, opening the blade from her pocket and ran forward. Instead of seeing this creature, she saw a monster...she saw Negan. Ramming the knife into it's head, it shuttered, before falling down dead. Yanking the blade back, she huffed, feeling her pulse race before wiping the blade on her jeans and folded it back onto her pocket. Turning, she ran, as fast as she could to Alexandra. Dawn. She couldn't believe it. She had found it. Unknown to Negan, the morning she had gone with him to Alexandra, she had spent most of the ride looking out the window, remembering every turn, every landmark. It had been hard, but while running, she came across an old broken down general store. Lucky for her there were two spread out walkers, and she was able to run in and grab a compass.

The faceplate was cracked, but still worked. After hours of moving as fast as she could, through fields, and woods, she finally came down the long road and saw the high gates. Nervously she bit down on her bottom lip before hurrying down towards it, praying they would listen. The sky had a beautiful purple look to it as the sun had just begun to rise. When she reached the gates, a voice came from above. "Hands up!" Lucy was exhausted, her feet ached, and she was freezing. Instead she slowly opened her hands and stared up, trying to find the source of where the voice was coming from.

"I...need to talk to Rick, the leader."

"Who sent you?"

"I...came myself. Here..."

She reached behind her and pulled the handgun out, tossing it forward it landed on the gravel loudly before she pulled her knife as well, flinging it down. Her hands still up, she stared up.

"I need to see him please!"

Just then the gates slowly opened. Standing back, she saw two people she didn't recognize.

"I need to talk to Rick..."

"He just came back from the Hilltop..."

Before he could finish, Rick walked out of the shadows, holding a gun himself. He looked tired. The moment he saw Lucy, his eyes widened.

"What are you..."

"I escaped...I need to talk to you please, I think they are going to be looking for me soon and there isn't much time."