They called me insane; mentally-ill. I couldn't believe it. So now I was deemed 'sick' for wanting to find love?! Yes, I killed people, but they fucking deserved it! And all those men were pedophiles anyway, so wasn't I really doing the world a favor?! The courts didn't seem to think so, as I was sent right back to Tallinn and locked in a goddamn mental hospital! I swear, they are the insane ones, NOT me!
The Saarne Institute was a castle-like shaped building, but it was anything but royalty. It was Hell, pure Hell! The place was filthy and the halls echoed with the screams of the insane. I didn't belong here!
They stripped me of my costume and forced me to wear white scrubs and no fucking shoes. Then they took my mugshot and soon I was escorted to my cell. A fucking padded cell! Oh god, I was truly in a nuthouse. There was no window in my cell, except for the small barred window on the door; probably for the orderlies and doctors to spy on me. All I had was a cot and a nightstand with an old Bible in it. Not even a toilet was in here! Was this really what my life was reduced to? What did I do to deserve this?
But to my surprise, I had a visitor on my first day here...
"Leena?" I heard a familiar voice call, and my heart leapt with joy at the sight of my twin's face staring at me through the bars.
"Sister!" I jumped up, running to the door to greet her. I smiled wide from ear to ear; tears of joy swelling in my eyes. I thought she was here to free me, to save me from this horrid place. But she didn't look too thrilled to see me here.
Veera frowned, "Leena, what did you do? How? How could you kill so many people? I can understand why you killed Father, but...becoming a prostitute?! What the hell were you thinking?"
"Are you not happy to see me?" I asked, avoiding her interrogation. I felt hurt to see my beautiful sister look at me like this. "It's been so many years, Veera, so many goddamned years! I've missed you!" I reached out through the tiny window, wanting to touch her or hold her hand.
"I've missed you too, sister. But no, I'm not happy to see you like this!" She took my hand in her's and my heart skipped a beat.
"So take me away from here! Tell them I'm innocent!"
She looked at me sadly, "You know I can't do that. You're not innocent, Leena. I don't believe you're a monster but I do believe Father ruined you. You're sick and need help, sister." Veera sighed, "Why didn't you just run away with me when you had the chance?"
She had me crying now. "I couldn't do that then."
"Yes, you could! But you let Father control you!"
"He loved me!"
"No, Leena. He molested us! Can't you see that? And if he 'loved' you so much, then why did you murder him and run away?"
I didn't answer her. I couldn't admit that she was right.
Veera shook her head and sighed again, "I love you, Leena."
My heart skipped another beat. "Y-You do?"
"Of course, I do. You're my twin sister. I'll always love you...no matter what you do."
"I love you too, Veera. I always have..."
Before she could say another word, I pull my sister up close to the window and kissed her. A real kiss; sticking my tongue in her mouth.
But Veera didn't kiss me back. She recoiled from me; a look of pure disgust and horror on her face.
"Oh my God! Oh my God, Leena! You love me like THAT?!"
"Of course! Don't you?"
"NO!"
I felt like my very soul was being crushed. I tried to reach for her again but she backed away.
"You're sicker than I thought! Father's brainwashed you!"
I choked between sobs, "B-But V-V-Veera, you're all I got left!"
Veera wiped a tear from her eye as she backed away again. "Goodbye, Leena," she then turned to leave, walking away from me, walking out of my life again.
"No! VEERA! You're all I've got! Don't leave me here! YOU'RE ALL I'VE GOT!"
But there was no answer; she just kept walking down the hall. I suddenly lost it.
"YOU SELFISH BITCH! YOU DARE LEAVE ME IN HERE?! If I EVER see your face again, you're DEAD! DO YOU HEAR ME?! YOU'RE DEAD! I'LL KILL YOU JUST LIKE FATHER! YOU'LL BE BURRIED RIGHT BESIDE HIM!"
But I never saw or heard from Veera again.
I slid slowly down the padded door, hugging my knees to my chest, I cried and cried. My Father didn't want me and now even my own sister didn't want me.
I was truly alone...