Chapter Fifteen: Letters

"Delicate" -Taylor Swift

"But, Kingsley, I just think it would be so much easier if a professional did it! What if I bugger it up? Their brains might turn to mush, and then where will I be? I would die of guilt you know. Do you really want me to die?"

Kingsley actually rolled his eyes at her. "Hermione, you and I both know that you are more than a capable witch-"

"-But I'm no professional!" She protested, refusing to let him finish.

"Hermione, we can't spare anyone at the momen-"

"Kingsley, er, I mean: Minister, you have enough people for someone to follow me around unnecessarily, but you can't spare someone for this?" She pouted.

"Different department," He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. He knew she wasn't going to let the matter drop, and to be completely honest, he didn't very much blame her. It was bound to be an awkward conversation, returning someone's memories who had no idea that you had taken them. Made doubly awkward was the fact that it was her parents. "Fine. But you're going to have to face them sooner or later, Hermione, you can't avoid them forever."

"I know, Kings- er, Minister. Thank you." Hermione smiled broadly, failing to mention that she had become particularly proficient at avoiding people in these past few weeks. One person in particular. "I'm truly grateful, you know! You're my hero."

He snorted and waved her away. "Yeah, yeah. Now get out of here. I have real work to do."

She grinned and left his office, shutting the door quietly behind her. Her shoulders slumped from relieved tension. She had been mulling the situation over in her brain for three weeks, trying to decide the best course of action, if any, to take when it came to her parents' memories. She had finally decided to beg Kingsley to have one of his people do it, and thank Merlin he had relented. That was the biggest task off of her shoulders at least.

She wasn't really watching where she was going when she ran into a muscular frame. Papers scattered in every direction and Hermione's face reddened. She stooped to help gather them, blurting out apology after apology. The papers were tugged from her grasp, flying into a neat pile before rising into the air. She stood, embarassed that she had once again forgotten about her wand.

"Miss Granger. How lovely to see you, again."

Her blood ran cold just from hearing the sound of his voice. She met his gaze evenly, coolly. "Auror Barrett. Hello."

He quirked an eyebrow. "Not a very warm greeting. Tell me: what exactly did I do to offend you so? We've hardly spoken to each other."

Hermione flushed, chewing her lip. "You've done nothing to me, sir. It wasn't my intention to be rude."

"And yet here we are."

Hermione's mouth dropped open at his audactity. She couldn't get a word out before he was speaking again. She missed most of what he said.

"I'm sorry. What was that?"

He sneered. "Rude and apparently hard of hearing, as well." He tsk'd. "I said: Are you attending the gala next Friday night?"

Hermione bit her lip and nodded slowly. "I thought I might make an appearance..." She said non-comittally.

"Do you have a date for the evening?" He asked, and she very nearly gagged. He didn't really think she would go anywhere with him, did he?

"Um, yes, actually."

He didn't seem very suprised. He smoothed down his robes for a moment before asking, "Who was lucky enough to win your heart?"

Her eyebrows pulled together as she studied him. "I'm going with a friend. My friend, Ron Weasley," she lied smoothly.

That seemed to catch him off guard, but his features quickly smoothed out as he said, "I would have thought that you and Mister Malfoy would be going as an item. At the hearing, you two seemed pretty... close. And your memories, I mean, it was pretty obvious that you adored him." She was too unsettled by the turn in their conversation to say anything, which didn't much matter, as it turns out, because he wasn't done talking. "I think the muggles call that 'Stockholm Syndrome,' the obvious obsession you had with him. It's when someone has been in captivity fo-"

"I know what 'Stockholm Syndrome' is!" Hermione snapped, finally finding her voice. "I am not, nor was I ever, suffering from that affliction. I am thankful to Draco for helping me escape and we are friendly with one another. That is it. I'm sorry to disappoint, Auror Barrett. If you want to gossip, I'd recommend Rita Skeeter's column in the Daily Prophet. Otherwise, keep your bloody nose out of my gosh damn business!"

She slammed her shoulder into his side as she passed, hurrying into the nearest lift. She heard him chuckle as the door clanged shut and the lift been moving. She was shaking, she was so mad. How dare he? She fought to get herself under control. She was meeting her friends at the Leaky Cauldron so that they could gather the supplies they would need for school. She didn't want to still be fuming when she arrived.

Draco sat at the bar, his leg tapping a nervous rythym into the rung of the stool his foot rested on. The bar keep slid him a butterbeer and he chugged it for something to do. He was going crazy. It had been three weeks since he'd last seen Granger. Three weeks since he had kissed her in his bedroom. Three weeks of fucking agony.

He would never have thought that he could need to see someone like this, but he needed to see her! He could feel it in his bones. He couldn't focus on anything. He should have never sent her away that night. He had fucked up royally. And now, she was avoiding him at all costs.

She had warded him out of the Burrow. The floo was now blocked and when he apparated and walked over the hill, where the Burrow should have sat, was now just an empty field. He knew that it was still there, the ward was just hiding it, but try as he might, he couldn't even come close to it. Everytime he would start down the hill, he'd somehow find himself walking in the opposite direction. It was immensely frustrating.

He had tried owling her, borrowing a sympathetic Andromeda's owl. The letters had all been returned with the seals still in tact. Hell, she wouldn't even write back in the bloody journal! She was driving him mad without even having to do anything.

Theo sat beside him, nursing a tumbler of fire whiskey. He wasn't saying anything. It wouldn't do any good. Draco wasn't in the mood to talk to any one. No one other than her at least.

The bell above the door tinkled and Looney, the She-Weasel and Longbottom walked in. Draco frowned when he realised that she wasn't with them, his eyes narrowing at Theo. "You said she was coming," he hissed. Theo shrugged and mouthed, "Thought she was," before striding across the room and planting an indecent kiss on Lovegood's lips. Draco let out a disgusted groan.

"Hey," Ginny said, flopping down beside him at the bar. "Butterbeer," she called to the bar keep. "It's been a while."

Draco rolled his eyes. "Not long enough. Why isn't Granger with you?"

"She's meeting us here," Ginny said, arching a flaming eyebrow. "She had a meeting with Kingsley."

Any relief Draco might have felt at her first words was quickly dashed away by the ones that followed. "A meeting for what?" He demanded.

Both of her eyebrows shot up at his tone. "Ask her yourself," she snapped back. She grabbed up her butterbeer and took a long drink, eyeing him in her periphreal.

The bell tinkled once more and he looked up expectantly, only to be disappointed again. Blaise and Pansy walked in, hand in hand, as usual. He rolled his eyes.

Another tinkle. His head jerked up. Dean Thomas stood just inside the doorway. "Urgh! Dammit all!" Draco growled.

Dean looked amused and confused. "S'nice to see you, too, Malfoy."

Theo grinned over his shoulder at him, slinging his arm around Lovegood. "Ah, don't mind him. He's just upset that he-"

"Theo," Draco said, quietly, a clear warning in his voice.

There was a whoosh as someone arrived by the floo. Draco didn't even bother looking this time. It probably wasn't-

"'Mione!" Neville called happily and Draco's head snapped up. He pivoted on his stool and their eyes met just briefly before she turned away from him. She looked flustered.

She let Neville pull her into a hug and was then passed around the group as they all greeted her, chattering away happily about everything they would need for the upcoming school year. Draco could give a fuck about textbooks at the moment. He just wanted her to look at him. To awknowledge him.

He was disappointed, when she immediately headed for the exit, out into the hum drum of the alley outside. He threw some money down onto the counter and followed the others out.

She was chatting animatedly with Pansy, and for some reason that put a sour taste in Draco's mouth. It had less to do with his and Pansy's past, and more to do with the fact that she seemed to have no problem talking to his friends. He scowled, shoving his hands into the pocket of his trousers. Well, if she wanted to play these games, he would humor her. But she was going to talk to him today.

Draco increased the speed of his steps so that they fell in time with Blaise's. His friend shot him a knowing look and Draco scowled at the amusement in his dark eyes. Of course, every one thought it was just so bloody humorous. He wanted to hex him. Instead he started up a conversation, taking note of the way Hermione flinched slightly at the sound of his voice. Her eyes remained pointedly else where, refusing to look at him.

Their group stopped in front of Flourish and Blotts. "Gotta start somewhere, right?" Ginny said, grinning over her shoulder as she pulled the door open. They all followed her in, splitting into smaller groups to gather books they needed for their individual classes. Draco followed after Hermione, not bothering to glance at his book list.

She wasn't alone. Luna, Theo, and Pansy were all in the same section. So, he browsed the shelves in silence, always making sure that he was in her line of sight. His stomach twisted the first time he saw her chance a glance at him in his periphreal. It reacted similarly the next 5 or so times it happened. When they all moved on, he gathered up the books he needed, satisfied that she wasn't as oblivious to his presence as she would have him believe.

For the rest of the day, he repeated the process over and over. Anytime they were in a shop, he would stand close enough that it was impossible for her to ignore him, but he wouldn't speak or look at her. At least not where she would see him looking.

She looked thinner, dark circles hung under her chocolate eyes and though she smiled often throughout the day, it never quite reached her eyes. He didn't like it. She looked worse than she had at the manor in Wales. He wanted to demand the last time she had eaten, or slept for that matter, but he resisted.

"Let's all go for a drink!" Theo suggested excitedly. They had just finished up and every one was tired, but no one argued with him. Luna's arm was tucked through his, her head resting against his shoulder.

The Leaky Cauldron was packed and Ginny suggested they just get a few bottles of firewhiskey and have an end of summer bonfire at the Burrow. Everyone started fishing around for money, but Draco was quicker. He handed Theo a fistful of coins and his friend grinned at him, twirled up to the bar and told the bar keep what he wanted. She passed over the bottles and he skipped back over after shrinking them and stuffing them into his pockets.

Luna giggled and he waggled his eyebrows. "What's funny baby?"

She shook her head, "You look like one of the dancing fairies my father and I saw on our trip to find the Crumple Horned Snorkack."

Theo was the only one in the group who didn't roll his eyes, he just continued staring at her in amused adoration. "And did you find one?"

She sighed. "Sadly, no. But we did find an colony of Blibbering Humdingers!"

Draco snorted, and Theo flipped him off behind Lovegood's back, but he was grinning as well.

"Well, are we ready? Because I for one am ready to get rip roaringly pissed." Ginny grinned at them all. "Harry and Ron should be back by now, too."

Hermione's eyes flicked to Draco's face and he met her gaze momentarily before she looked away, her cheeks flushing with color.

Draco didn't know what to expect when they apparated, but he was pleasantly suprised when the Burrow was plainly visible from the top of the hill. He followed the others down without incident. Mrs. Weasley didn't seem to mind all of the extra guests one bit. In fact, she seemed ecstatic. Draco felt a pang as he thought of how his own mother would have been in a panic if he had shown up to dinner lugging behind a group of friends without owling in advance. A wave of sadness washed over him and he quickly pushed it down. He wasn't weak and he wasn't going to let that gripping depression take hold of him. Not yet.

Hermione watched as the men stacked up wood for a fire. She was sitting, smushed in between Ginny and Luna. There were plenty of other seats, but she didn't want to take the chance that Draco might sit beside her.

She hadn't missed the way his eyes had been on her all throughout supper. She had pushed around her food, taking tiny bites when she noticed any one looking at her. She wasn't hungry.

She was, however, exhausted. The night terrors were unrelenting. They had become unbearable of late and she was barely sleeping at all. She had tried sleeping draughts, but they merely made it impossible for her to wake, while her brain dredged up the horrors buried deep inside her mind. She had given those up after trying them twice. She would rather wake screaming than not be able to wake at all. She had to cast silencing charms over herself, to keep from waking Ginny.

"You've been quiet today," Ginny mused quietly.

"Mm," Hermione grunted.

"What's going on with you and Draco?"

Hermione's head shot up to meet her friends concerned gaze. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

Ginny grimaced, "Hermione, I'm not an idiot. You went from talking to him like he was one of your best friends to competely ignoring him. He looks miserable and so do you."

Hermione chewed her lip, her gaze automatically seeking him out. He was standing with Theo and Dean, and while the other two were chatting happily, Draco looked sullen. He stared at the newly flaming pile of wood, his grey eyes brightened by the light of the fire.

"If you don't want to talk to me about it, that's fine. But I think you should talk to him."

Hermione sighed and narrowed her eyes at her friend. "You don't even like Draco."

"Eh, he's not so bad, really. Super hot, too," She smiled and nudged Hermione's arm.

Theo conjured up some cups and began passing them out, nearly filled to the brim with firewhiskey.

"For fuck's sake, Theo, are you trying to kill us?" Pansy squealed, taking a small sip.

"We're going to play a game and I don't want to have to keep pouring shots. I played this with a group of muggle girls last summer," he shot a guilty glance at Luna, and quickly continued, "Um, but it's called 'Never Have I Ever.' You say something that you've never done and if anyone else has done it, then they drink. If no one else has done what you said, then you have to drink. Ready? Every one sit down and I'll start."

Harry took the spot on Ginny's other side and Theo took the seat on Luna's other side. Hermione's eyes met Draco's across the fire and she flushed before looking away. Her gaze then fell on Ron who was looking between the two of them with poorly concealed suspicion.

"Okay, let's get the ball rolling! Never have I ever kissed a man," Theo grinned, waggling his eyebrows. Hermione rolled her eyes and all of the girls, plus Dean and Blaise took sips of their drinks. "Your turn baby," Theo turned to Luna.

"Um... never have I ever had sex." She seemed completely at ease with the statement, but Hermione blushed hard as everyone aside from herself and Luna sipped from their cups. That was mortifying to her.

Her face was still burning when Ginny nudged her. "You're turn," she whispered.

"Oh, um, never have I ever been in handcuffs."

The four Slytherins drank, and also Harry and Ginny. Hermione grimaced. She did not want to know.

Ginny bounced excitedly, "Never have I ever kissed a Slytherin!"

Hermione flushed and did her damnedest to avoid Draco's gaze. Ginny was smiling wickedly beside her and she wanted to kick her. Instead she hesitantly brought her cup to her lips and took a sip.

"WHAT?" Ron exclaimed, from across the fire. "Who have you kissed from Slytherin?"

Hermione could feel her face growing hotter by the second, and she was rescued by Theo. "Uh, uh, uh. No questions. Potter, go ahead."

"Oh, um, right." Harry said, looking from Hermione to Ron and back again. "Never have I ever had a threesome."

Pansy, Blaise, Theo and Dean all drank.

Pansy was next. "Never have I ever regretted a kiss."

Hermione sat stoically, not able to resist watching Draco to see if he drank. He didn't and her heart fluttered a bit. His grey eyes bore into her brown. She had regretted kissing Ron, but she knew if she drank now, Draco would assume she regretted their kiss. And she certainly didn't.

Hermione barely caught Blaise's statement, that he had never been skinny dipping. She drank, and ignored the suprised glances she got in return. Dean said he had never sat up all night studying. She drank. Neville had never had a sibling. Hermione paused and then drank, thinking of her parents, her stomach clenching a bit at that memory. George had never worn a bra. Drink. Dean had never had a crush on a professor. Drink. Draco smirked a bit and said, "Never have I ever been held hostage."

Hermione, Luna, Neville and Dean all drank, along with Ron and Harry who had briefly been held at the Malfoy manor a few months prior.

And then it was Ron's turn. Hermione's head was spinning from the buzz of the alcohol. Her empty stomach and the fact that she never drank made her a lightweight. She didn't mind. It was a pleasant feeling. She was actually beginning to enjoy herself when Ron spoke and spoiled her good mood.

"Never have I ever kissed Malfoy!" He was staring right at Hermione as he said it and she knew he face probably gave her away before the tilt of her cup did. Pansy took a gulp of her whiskey, watching her sympathetically. Hermione raised her cup, closed her eyes and took a large pull.

"I fucking knew it!" Ron shouted, his words slurring slightly.

Hermione sighed, opening her eyes to meet Draco's. He looked almost relieved. Perhaps he thought she might deny it. But she saw no point. It would all come to light eventually.

She tuned back into Ron's raving then, "-and I knew. I fucking knew. When you all apparated and you were holding onto him like a bloody lifeline! And you just kept quiet! Months, this has been going on and you just keep it shut up!" He was standing up now, striding around the fire towards her.

"It hasn't been going on for months, Ronald. We kissed three weeks ago, once! And it's none of your business!"

"None of my- None of my bloody business? Well, see, before his fucking family kidnapped you, you were kissing me! So, excuse me for thinking there was a little more than friendship there!"

Hermione chanced a glance at Draco. He was standing now, his face stormy. "You know why I kissed you, Ron. I never meant to hurt you-"

"Well, you did!" Ron snapped, his face now inches from hers. She could feel his hot breath on her face and the pain in his eyes was staggering. "You did, Hermione, intentionally or not," he said, his voice lower now.

Tears pricked her eyes. She hated seeing her best friend in pain and what's more, she hated herself for being the one to cause him pain. "I'm sorry," she whispered.

"Yeah, you are," Ron said coldly, shoving around her and causing her to stumble on her wobbly legs. She fell hard on her bum and she stayed there on the ground, her tears spilling over. She could her Ginny yelling at Ron as she followed his retreating figure. She felt terrible for hurting him, but she didn't deserve that kind of treatment, did she?

Strong hands tugged her up and she didn't resist as he pulled her into his arms. His familiar scent permeated her senses and she sobbed against his chest. The alcohol clouding her head was making it extremely difficult to form coherent thoughts, but she suddenly realised she was supposed to be mad at him. She pushed away from his chest, and he held her tighter. She pushed again, harder this time and he released her.

As soon as she was free she tore off toward the Burrow, she didn't stop until she was in Ginny's room, safe on her cot. There she let herself go to pieces and she drifted into a fitful night's sleep.

Draco watched her go, feeling like shit. He hated seeing her cry. He wanted to find Weasley and kill him for upsetting her, but he knew that it was his fault, too. He had hurt her.

"What the hell is going on with you two, Malfoy? No games. I want the truth." Potter asked, his green eyes hard as he stared him down. Everyone else was still sitting around the fire in stunned silence, but their eyes turned at the scent of new drama brewing.

"Nothing," Draco said, but he knew better than to hope that Potter would let it drop that easily.

"Bullshite, Malfoy, I want the truth!" He growled, grabbing Draco's arm.

He jerked away from him, "We kissed! For fuck's sake, she just told you all, if you'd open your bloody ears. Once. Three weeks ago."

"Is that what's been wrong with her the past three weeks then? She barely eats, she's not sleeping. What the hell did you do to her Malfoy?"

"Listen closely, because I am only going to say this once: What is or isn't, did or didn't, will or won't happen between Granger and I is none of your fucking business, Potter. So, fuck off." He started up the hill, away from the Burrow. He needed to get out of there.

"It is my concern when her health is being affected!" Potter snapped, following closely on his heels.

"In case you haven't noticed, Potter, she hasn't been sleeping well for a lot longer than the past three weeks. She has night terrors. As for her not eating, I don't know what to tell you. I don't like it any more than you do, but she won't fucking talk to me!"

"What happened between you two?" Harry asked, quiet now.

"I fucked up."

"Obviously. More specifically?"

Draco sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "We kissed and I told her to leave. I'm not good for her."

"Well, that... yeah, I can see why she'd be upset." Harry said, running a hand through his already mussed up hair.

"Don't fucking rub it in, Potter," Draco snapped. "I regret it now. It's all I've thought about for the past three weeks."

Harry blew out a long breath. "Well, have you tried apologising?"

Draco rolled his eyes, throwing his hands up. "What part of 'she won't talk to me' didn't you understand?"

Harry shrugged. "If you want something bad enough, you find a way."

"Yes, thank you. You sound like a fucking motivational speaker." He didn't wait for him to say anything else. He turned on the spot and apparated.