Sorry for the delay on this one. I'm adjusting to a new keyboard on the laptop we resurrected from used parts this past weekend. Also, this little blurb was more challenging to write than the others as I needed to make it match the chapter title. "SLOWLY". Anyway, I hope there aren't too many typos. I tried to self-edit, but there were a couple re-writes & that's when I tend to make mistakes. I'm sure you'll let me know though. ;-)
Slowly…
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She'd forgotten, or not realized, that Edward occasionally still gets recognized when he goes out. She's also forgotten how people can stare, or stop to say hello and interrupt him mid-sentence in the process.
He handles it with humility and humor.
Bella… not so much.
"It's really okay, Bella."
She smiles and covers her cheeks. "I honestly forgot. I don't know how..."
He shrugs. "It's been a while. And I can honestly say that it's a little out of the ordinary anymore. Please don't worry about it."
"I'll only worry about it in proportion to the number of times we're interrupted today. How's that?"
He laughs. "Sure, that sounds fair enough."
They both relax and pick their conversation where it left off. So far they've stayed away from heavy topics and kept it casual: The ferry schedule and traffic around Puget Sound. The rising cost of gas and fuel economy. What kind of car Edward drives and Charlie's old truck. The one Bella bought from him when she moved back to Washington.
Edward's eyes reflect something like regret, or guilt.
"Why didn't you take your car with you?" he asks. "When you left California?"
Bella's answer is simple, but telling. "It would have hurt too much."
He acknowledges her with a nod and rubs his chin in thought, shaking his head after a moment. "I… I probably shouldn't tell you this, but…"
The silence stretches on.
"What?"
"I still have it."
Bella feels confused for a moment, then,
"My car?" she gasps.
He nods.
"Why?"
His smile is wry as he shrugs. "It would have hurt too much."
There is nothing Bella can say to that in the moment so she doesn't even try. Graciously, Edward doesn't force her to reply. He simply clears his throat and scoots his chair back, asking Bella if she'd like another coffee. She nods, grateful for the moment to herself and gives him her preference.
She waits until he's a few feet away before letting out the stuttered breath she'd been holding in. She manages not to get emotional, but only just.
She's composed herself by the time Edward returns, and they find picking up a conversation easy enough. The shadows grow long on the street outside before the feelings between them —leftovers of their shared past— become too much to ignore.
A timely joke and shared laughter is all it takes to break the damn.
"I've missed you, Isabella."
"I've missed you, too, E."
The use of her little nickname for him both takes him by surprise and makes him braver.
"I looked for you afterwards, you know. It took me a while to pinpoint who I was looking for because of the stroke, but… I eventually figured out what was missing."
Bella cringes. She doesn't like to think about what it was like for him, confused and unable to even communicate properly in those early days. Her father gave her updates with the basics from time to time, but other than that she never called anyone to check on him. If she had, she would have gone back. She's not even sure if she should ask him about it now.
What difference does it make, anyway?
"I'm…" she starts.
"Please don't say you're sorry," Edward interrupts. "Really. You've apologized too much already."
She gives a half smile. "Well, I am sorry. For some things."
He lets out an odd laugh. "Like what?"
Her gaze never wavers. "Like, I'm sorry it was disorienting for you. I'm sorry my absence may have made things hard to put together while you recuperated from the stroke, but…" She shakes her head. "I can't say I'm sorry for getting us both out of an unhealthy situation."
"I'm not sorry for that either. You're my hero, to be honest."
She rolls her eyes. "Very funny."
Edward smiles softly. "I wasn't really joking. But, then… I think you know that."
His eyes bore into her, making her inhale a breath to steady herself. "Yeah. I guess."
"There's no 'I guess'… you are. You were stronger than I think I'd have been had the situation been reversed."
She shifts uncomfortably until he adds, "Just look at how I've been harassing you since we bumped into each other."
He winks at her, making her laugh. "Oh, yes. You've been a regular stalker. My inbox is terrified."
He chuckles and gives her that smile. "It should be."
She giggles and has to take a breath to calm her stupid, fluttering heart. After a quiet moment, she decides to bite the bullet.
"I'm really glad you came today."
She catches him off guard, but covers well. "I'm really glad you asked me. I didn't think you would."
Bella nods. "I know."
He leans forward and sighs. "Bella, I…" He shakes his head and tries again. "I know you're scared. And I am, too. I don't wanna screw up again."
"I know. Me either."
Hesitant blue eyes meet misty brown ones.
"Do you think we can do this? Talk? See each other? Be friends?"
She shakes her head. "I don't know. Maybe…"
"Maybe."
"Yeah, maybe. Let's just go slowly. Take it one day at a time."
He looks at the ground, long and hard, while she tries not to notice him swallowing hard. When his eyes meet hers, her breath catches at the hope reflected back at her.
"Okay, then. One day at a time."
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