~(*o*)~(*o*)~(*o*)~

CHAPTER 11

Bitter Memories

Mikan watched as everyone froze on the spot.

No, not the funny kind of freezing. It was like…they were petrified. And yes, even the Empress herself! Imagine that? No, she can't. But she didn't need to – she's already seeing it. Mikan looked at the scary old woman again. The brunette gulped. She was looking at her and Mikan couldn't look away. It was like she was holding her in her gaze.

The old lady raised her eyebrows. "What is this?" she said in a tone of - what? - power? Mikan doesn't know. It sounds so strict. "No one would even greet me? Oh my, Kaoru, were you running this place askew in my absence?"

Mikan thought she saw the Empress twitch. "No, Your Majesty," was all she said.

Your Majesty? Mikan thought. Who is this woman? And why is the Empress scared of her?

"Simple courtesy! Manners!" the old woman was saying. "Where did those go?"

The Empress bowed her head in compliance. "Children, greet Her Majesty," Kaoru ordered as she herself bowed before the old woman. Mikan thought she'd never see this day. The Empress, proud and beautiful - bowing to someone? And yet, here it is. Mikan couldn't really process who she was.

Before she knew it, everyone was kneeling before the old woman, like in those ancient Japanese customs. The brunette finally did so, feeling so out of place and scared.

"Welcome back," she heard Natsume say. "Your Majesty,"

The brunette couldn't see the old woman's expression but the room grew was silent for a while. It seems like even Natsume was tamed - or scared? - of this person. Well, who wouldn't be? Mikan swears that the temperature dropped by a couple of degrees when she entered the room.

"Rise," Mikan heard her say. "I had enough of this," she added.

Everyone did as she said.

It strangely felt like one of those moments when you were doing something fun and then the one who holds the authority suddenly cuts everything off. It was so dull…and so empty.

The older woman walked around them. They were in a line so it seemed as though she was inspecting them, in which she probably really was. Mikan was reminded of the word self-conscious. Honestly, since she entered the Palace, she hasn't received any Princess Lessons yet. Well, she wasn't sure if there really were such things but now, she felt as though she needed one badly.

"Stop slouching," she heard the old woman say as she felt something tapping her back - a fan? Mikan straightened herself.

Finally, the woman went into view, strangely looking at her. The young princess tensed.

"Kaoru," she called.

"Y-yes, Your Majesty?" she answered.

"Stop stuttering. It is unbecoming of the present Empress," The older woman reprimanded. "Explain,"

Kaoru looked around and bowed her head in understanding, "Your Majesty, she is Mikan Sakura-Yukihira, Natsume's betrothed as he just turned seventeen roughly the week before the last,"

Mikan felt the urge to fidget. God, her heart's hammering inside her ribcage like a wild bird.

"And the copy? What were you occupied of before I arrived?" she asked.

"It was a copy of Natsume's brief interview, Your Majesty," The Empress answered once again.

"Natsume," the older woman repeated, as if the name didn't ring a bell. "Oh, the Crown Prince," she said, as if remembering for the first time. Mikan thought she saw Natsume scowl in hatred. "What has he done this time?" she asked in a tone as if what was happening was only one of Natsume's.

Well, Mikan didn't know and she wasn't sure why but she hated how she seems to treat the lad. It was as if he was nothing but an instrument for preserving their Royal Bloodline and the Throne.

"We," The Empress quivered. "We thought he was gay,"

That caught the woman off guard. "Gay!" then she faced Natsume and slapped him. Mikan flinched. "You have no rights to become gay. You have broken a lot of my rules, young man and most of those times I have forgiven you for they all said that you were young. You do not understand these things yet but now - now you are seventeen and betrothed. Know your place."

Mikan's lips thinned. She slapped Natsume. She slapped Natsume because of the stupid misunderstanding she made. "I-it was my fault!" Mikan burst then covered her mouth. Everyone looked at her. The moment the words slid out of her mouth, she wished them in again. Mikan wanted to shut her eyes closed so tight when the older woman averted her stern gaze at her, as if disintegrating her.

"I told you to stop stuttering," she told Mikan, raising her eyebrows. "A princess does not slouch and certainly doesn't impulsively interfere in conversations without permission! Have you had your Princess Lessons yet?" she asked.

So there were such things. "N-" Mikan cleared her throat. She was about to stutter. "No, Your Majesty,"

The older woman narrowed her eyes. "Well then I guess I have to give them to you, myself,"

"Your Majesty!" The Empress exclaimed. Your Majesty glared at her and the Empress surprisingly cowered.

"Do not interfere, Kaoru," she said. "I forbid you. You have failed to do your duty therefore I shall take over this…" she eyed Mikan. "Young one,"

Suddenly a ring was heard throughout. The older woman narrowed her eyes. "Whoever you are, answer it this instant. I'm giving you a minute," she muttered.

Surprisingly, Hotaru stoically fished her phone out and did her transaction, everyone eyeing her. After she finished, she said, "Your Majesty, may I request to speak?"

The older woman harrumphed but surprisingly agreed.

"The reporters have contacted me and they requested to book an interview regarding the matter of the Crown Prince," Hotaru nonchalantly said.

Her Majesty smirked, "Still shamelessly hunting for fortune, unwanted daughter of Hiyori?" Mikan felt more anger rise up inside her. Who is this woman and how can she just trample on her friends like that? First Natsume and now…Hotaru? What does she mean by unwanted?!

"Very well then," she continued. "More reason for me to train this young miss so as not to dishonor the Royal Family tomorrow. Meet me at the Imperial Library this afternoon, young lady," she muttered then left.

Not realizing that they were all holding their breaths the whole time, as soon as the door closed, everyone let out a sigh of relief.

~(*o*)~(*o*)~(*o*)~

"Who was that?!" Mikan burst. Hotaru, Misaki, Aoi and the brunette are currently in her room after all that happened while the boys decided to flee the Palace for some breathing air. It seems like Natsume really minded what happened. Well, who wouldn't anyway?

Misaki slumped in her seat and sighed. "I never thought I'd see her again," she said and hugged herself. "Oh god, she still scares me,"

Aoi just nodded.

"Won't anyone answer me? Who was that woman and why did you call her Your Majesty?" Mikan demanded, fuming. Since she couldn't let all her anger out a while ago because she was also scared of the woman, she decided to let it all out in her room instead.

Hotaru looked at her best friend. "You really are an idiot. Replace your brain with a faster one, dummy,"

The brunette just glared at her. "Would you please just tell me who she is?! She acts as if she owns the place! She even - she even…" Mikan let her sentence cut loose, hanging suspended on air. She couldn't say it out loud. She even hurt you and Natsume, she wanted to say but she couldn't - because it seems so impossible. Who could scare the ever so stoic cousins?!

"T-that was grandma," Aoi muttered, looking at her shoes.

"GRANDMA?!" Mikan screamed. "That was your Grandmother?!"

Aoi nodded. Mikan couldn't believe it. How could someone act so cold and hateful in front of her own flesh and blood?

"She's horrible and cold," Aoi said again. It was the first time Mikan heard her speak ill of others. "But she's our Grandma. Father ascended the throne when Grandpa died years ago. Unlike Grandma, Grandpa was kind."

Mikan couldn't help but feel sorry. She made a promise to herself that she'd let Aoi meet her Grandma instead since hers was that ideal cookie-baking type. A real Grandma. "W-why don't you call her Grandma?"

"She never lets us call her 'Grandma'," Aoi said. "She gets angry when we do so."

Hotaru smirked. "We don't have a Grandmother, Mikan," she said. The brunette knitted her eyebrows in confusion. "We only have an Empress,"

The brunette didn't understand but let it go. "It sucks," was all she could say. Somehow, the ex-Empress' arrival wrecked their day.

Misaki started laughing. Mikan looked at her weirdly. "I remember when we were small," she said. "I used to chase Tsubasa around. We ran around the Palace, me and him…then, I tripped and bumped on a stand. The vase on that stand crashed. I was so scared, I started crying. Tsubasa couldn't stop me," she went on, smiling sadly. She has that distant look on her face when one's reminiscing memories - sad memories. "Then, that woman came. I cried more because she scared me. She started asking who broke the vase. It was a family heirloom, you see. Tsubasa said it was his fault. I couldn't say anything. I didn't even tell her it was me. Do you know what she did?"

Mikan swallowed. Misaki continued to smile.

"She dragged Tsubasa. 'Go home, little girl' was all she said while that stupid guy grinned at me like nothing was wrong and mouthed, 'Go' while shooing me away like I was some sort of dog. I didn't see Tsubasa for days after that and when I finally did…he was starving and looked so thin. I found out that she locked him up in a room and was only given cold scarce meals thrice a day. Since then, I've hated her. Well, everyone does anyway," she shrugged.

Hotaru narrowed her eyes. "That woman is hateful," was all she said.

"W-why does she seem to dislike the Empress?" Mikan asked because seriously, even if the black-haired woman was quite annoying and childish, she's not hateful in any way. She's one of the loveliest persons Mikan ever met.

Misaki sighed. "Aunt's different," she said. "She's not like one of those strict stuck-up Royalties. She's…normal and fun. That woman hates that. For her, life in the Palace is everything connected to running the country and traditions. Exact opposite of Auntie. That's why when she left for her medications, the Palace started brightening up."

Somehow, Mikan came to understand more of the situations inside the Palace. Well, she can't say that everything she learned was a good thing but somehow…she feels relieved that there were also some sort of seriousness inside because everyday of her life living this Royal life of hers seems more and more like a dream. It was fun, she relented, despite the annoyance she feels at times. She likes it here, she decided. And if it were a dream, she'd feel really sad to wake up which is why learning that things also have their downsides…she can quite assure herself that this is still reality.

And somehow…that makes her a bit happy.

~(*o*)~(*o*)~(*o*)~

"Ahhhhhh," Tsubasa whined. They were currently in a bar - the only open bar that is. Duh, it's noontime! But nevertheless, they just decided that they needed some spirit and any kind of alcohol would do it. They were wearing disguises of course and were able to slip the underage Youichi inside. Besides, the kid's too tall for his own good. "Why didn't anyone warn us that she's back?!" he said as he took a swig of his scotch.

Natsume said nothing and simply downed his own glass, his cheek still red from the slap earlier.

"Grandma does what she likes. No one can stop her. I bet that her return was not planned at all," Ruka said. Unlike the two, he wasn't drinking.

Youichi tried to get a glass of scotch for himself but was quickly swatted by Tsubasa. "Orange Juice for you, kiddo," he stuck his tongue out. Youichi just glared at him.

"Damn right, Ruka," he muttered after. "Perhaps she heard the news over in England. That this guy -" he pointed over to Natsume. "- started liking men." At that, Ruka blushed while his cousin glared. "And vhoom! She's here!" Tsubasa smacked his hands together, emphasizing what he meant.

"Shut up," was all Natsume said. "Your parents," he began saying to Youichi. "They were the one in charge of that old hag right? Exactly why you stayed in England,"

Youichi just frowned at the memories. "Yeah. Well, and I thought I was free from her when she let me go back to Japan. I didn't know she'd follow,"

"Didn't Uncle or Auntie tell you about her?" Ruka asked.

The fourteen year-old guy just shook his head. "No, not a word. She probably escaped or something. Man, England sucks because of her. I guess I really will try going back there now. She's here anyway,"

Silence

Tsubasa started laughing. He's high. "Damn. This day sucks. Did you know she used to lock me up? Fed me barely edible meals." he muttered while he covered his eyes with his forearm.

Ruka sighed. "I'm worried about Mikan-chan," he said.

Just like that, something snapped inside Natsume.

"Shit," was all he said and left.

~(*o*)~(*o*)~(*o*)~

"Hotaru," Misaki called at the raven-haired genius as they play cards. "Aren't you worried about Mikan-chan?"

The girl continued to play. "No,"

Misaki sighed. "I don't understand you. Why not?"

"She can handle herself."

"You do remember that it's that old devil we're talking about here, right?"

"Obviously,"

Misaki sighed in frustration. "They're going to study Politics. Is Mikan-chan even ready for that?"

Hotaru simply shrugged and continued to play.

"You know," the strawberry-haired girl continued. "I was kind of wondering…why do you guys call Mikan-chan idiot or such every time?"

"Because she is,"

Misaki frowned. "And you're not worried? The hag might traumatize her!"

"Like I said, Misaki, she can handle herself,"

The older girl sat up, her face serious. "Hotaru, let me ask you. What's your rank when you were in Middle School?"

"First,"

"See? You're smart. You'll never understand. As you said, Mikan-chan is sort of…a…dummy so…she'll be having an extra-hard time,"

"You don't understand." was all Hotaru said.

Misaki threw her hands up in exasperation. "I don't understand you. Could you please explain how Mikan-chan can handle herself?"

Hotaru just looked at her and said, "She ranks second after me,"

Misaki almost dropped her cards.

~(*o*)~(*o*)~(*o*)~

"You're late," Grandma said as Mikan opened the door to the Library.

Mikan flinched. "I'm sorry,"

"Tardiness is inexcusable. Sit down," she commanded as the brunette complied. Truthfully, she was a little excited regarding the lessons despite the ruthless old woman being her mentor. "Sit up straight, back away from the chair," she corrected.

Mikan followed.

"Hands on your lap. Look dignified. The Crown Prince didn't pick you out to be a disgrace to our family. You will be the next Empress so start acting like one!" she ordered. "Be proud. Don't slouch,"

Then she ordered Mikan to stand and walk, all the while barking orders.

"Walk slowly. Gracefully and not as if your feet are made of steel!" she remarked sternly. After that, she started placing books on Mikan's head, one by one. "Now walk,"

Mikan feels like she was in a circus. She's never balanced five books on her head before! Besides from the fact that they're heavy and that any minute now, they'll topple, it's the scary gaze of the former Empress that makes the task extra-difficult. Slowly, as she walked, Mikan couldn't help but spread her arms to balance when suddenly, she felt a painful lashing on her hand. The brunette yelped and quickly aided her aching hand, looking at the older woman.

"You were asked to walk like an Empress, not walk like a rope-crosser," she said. "One mistake, one whip,"

Mikan felt herself wanting to cry but held it in. She won't lose to this hag, she decided.

She just won't.

~(*o*)~(*o*)~(*o*)~

When Natsume reached the Palace, he was already out of breath and had luckily avoided three potential severe car accidents.

He didn't know why but when he remembered the brunette inside the Library, suffering from that old hag's clutches, he felt strangely mad and…concerned? So he stormed away as fast as he can, leaving the other three in the bar while he dashed back home. Just as when he climbed off his car did he realize how stupid he was.

Stupid, he told himself. Why did you get worked up because of her? Why do you care? He shook his head and entered the Palace anyway.

That sounded so wrong, he knows. Natsume doesn't just care. He doesn't.

Well, since the brunette entered his life, he found himself strangely doing everything he usually doesn't do. It's weird. She's annoying but not like his fangirls. She's okay. She's the only girl unrelated to him that wouldn't just fall for his charms. It's alright when she annoys him. It's alright when she calls him by his first name. It's alright when he kissed her. She drives him mad. Everything is alright as long as it's her!

Is he mad? Somehow, Natsume thinks he's sick. Mikan - she's different. She's a mass of change that collided with his boring world and somehow, he isn't that sure if he hates it at all.

Natsume was about to knock on the Library door when it swung open. It was his grandmother, leaving the Library. Out of habit, he bowed his head.

But before the old hag left, Natsume thought she heard him say, "She's not a bad catch," and quickly raised his head to look at her, her figure already retreating.

Unsure, the raven-haired Prince found himself entering the Library anyway, finding the brunette slumped on one of the desks. Concern shot to his being and quickened his steps toward her.

"Hey, idiot," he called. Damn, he always says the wrong words.

She opened her chocolate eyes. "Oh, hey Natsume. Are you alright?" She sat up and touched his cheek - the one where his grandma slapped him - then he noticed her hands. They were red and had slight wounds on some places.

She tried to withdraw them from his grasp but it was too late. Natsume already had them captured in his hands. "What did she do to you?" he asked, louder than intended.

"N-nothing," Mikan lied. "I'm alright. I just made some mistakes."

Natsume frowned at her. "You're a terrible liar, Polka,"

Mikan pouted. "Really, I'm fine. I'm just beat!" she said, lying her head on the table again. She had lots of things to do. It was tiring. Papers were cluttered everywhere, bits of the lessons she had to learn. To think that she still has assignments.

"Come on," Natsume pulled her.

"Where? Hey, I said I'm tired!"

"Let's get Dr. Harada to clean those wounds,"

"What? I can handle them myself. They just need some band-aids, Natsume,"

Natsume glared at her. "Oh, ha-ha. Fine, let your wounds acquire infection. I'll gladly watch you die," he said. He doesn't mean it.

Mikan pouted. "Meanie," she said. And it was true. "Fine, let's go."

~(*o*)~(*o*)~(*o*)~

"Hey, Natsume," she said as they were walking. The Library was quite far from Dr. Harada's clinic. "You smell like alcohol. Have you been drinking?" she asked.

Natsume didn't reply.

"Sheesh," she cursed. "You always ignore me."

They walked.

"Hey, Natsume," Mikan called again.

He ignored her.

"Natsume, I say!" She screamed.

"What?"

She smiled. "Tutor me,"

~(*o*)~(*o*)~(*o*)~