Important Stuff and Junk: Happy New Year! Hope y'all had a fun and safe New Year and if you're on the east coast, like I am, you're staying as warm as possible! It's fraken freezing out there!
Once again, y'all left wonderful and amazing reviews and since they're so many, if I respond to all of them here, it'll push this story further down into the depths of this page! I'll answer what I can as quickly as I can, I know we all probably don't read my babble anyway! It's cool, the story is the important part here!
But first and foremost, I appreciate all the love and support from you guys. Seriously, I don't deserve you all. From reviews, to favorites and follows on this story, you guys have reached out and made this story what it is and all I can hope is to keep you guys happy with it! So thank you, seriously. Thank you so, so, so, so much! Your continued support means so much to me, I love reading your reviews. They honestly get me excited with you guys, I laugh and cry with you guys. This story is shaped because of YOU! So don't ever forget that!
Speaking of, I'll answer some questions you guys had!
Kimmyhazard, why the heck didn't you give us a scene involving their last night on StarKiller?!:That's a good question and I promise I have a decent answer that y'all will hate! I was holding that hostage to pepper into later chapters. However, since y'all wanted to see it, I added Ashlyn's POV of that night into this chapter. Kylo Ren's? Well, you still have to wait for that!
NSFW PLZ WTFBBQ?!: People, people, people, PLEASE! We will have an NSFW chapter, I have it planned and written and where it's going to happen! However, since this site is a tad bit strict over it's NSFW policy, I will be uploading that particular scene to my tumblr. The chapter will be written without it, but the detailed scene will be somewhere else. You'll totally know where it is and when it happens so do not panic! Also, those who also managed to find me on Tumblr already... I see you. I see you, guys. Welcome to my awkward Tumblr lol.
How the heck do you write your chapters?: This answers a lot, I think. I write scenes. I write super ridiculous scenes, sometimes really detailed or just dialogue and then expand on that. Most of this story has come from just stupid stuff I've written down and expanded on. Which, oddly enough, gave it the cool feeling of jumping from story-arc to story-arc. But that's typically how this story is created
AND FINALLY Your number one question: When the heck are we going to see jealous Kylo Ren?! I mean, heck! That handsome Poe Dameron is moving in on his lady?!: How about... we read this chapter. ;]
One last warning. Some violence.
OKAY ENOUGH TALKING. LET'S GO!
The base was full of excitement that morning, it seemed as though everyone was running around and in such a hurry. Everyone except Ashlyn. She wandered outside to train as normal that morning, however, she stopped when she noticed Poe was prepping a different X-wing than normal. Concerned, she wandered over to the X-wing, hearing BB-8 beeping warningly as he spotted the red haired girl first. "What's going on?"
Poe stopped prepping as he looked up from his toolbox, seeing Ashlyn and offering a weary smile. "I have to go."
"Go?" Ash asked. "Go where?"
Poe grabbed a few items from the box and haphazardly tossed them up into the cockpit of the X-wing. "We found the missing piece to Luke Skywalker." He explained. "I need to retrieve it."
She quirked a curious brow. "Just you?"
"It's a recon mission, get in and get out before the First Order catches on. I'm the best pilot to do that."
Ash didn't like that one bit. The threat that the First Order could be there as well was not something she wanted to hear. "So, this could be dangerous?"
"Worried about me, First Order?" Poe asked, that dazzling smile adorning his face.
Ash rolled her eyes. "Not a chance, hero." She teased right back, although, she could feel herself worrying more than she would have liked.
Poe lost his smile, but only a little bit as he moved forward, wrapping his arm around her and hugging her. "Hey, I'll be back."
Ash hugged him back, the first time she really felt any physical contact since she left StarKiller. "I know…" She said quietly. "I just have abandonment issues, I guess." She forced a laugh.
Poe pulled away. "When I get back, and I will come back." She couldn't help but smile at his hopeful attitude. "I can kick your butt at Sabacc again."
Ash laughed. "If I recall correctly, you didn't beat me." She looked over at the BB unit that rolled over and sat next to Poe. "Look out for him, okay?" She requested. "Stars know he can't look out for himself."
Poe chuckled as BB-8 blipped and beeped. "Yeah, yeah. Keep out of trouble, First Order." He nodded to BB-8. "Let's go, buddy." The two left in the X-Wing that was a little less inconspicuous than the black one he typically had. Ash watched as they took off, Poe saluting her before he left the atmosphere. She just had a bad feeling about it overall.
The base continued to be on high alert, waiting for Poe Dameron's signal that he had successfully retrieved the map. While everyone knew it wouldn't be right away, patience was lacking. This was a high sensitivity mission and everyone knew it.
However, without Poe to keep either one busy, that left more time for Ashlyn to meet with General Organa. She hadn't spoken to the woman since finding out about Ben Solo, she figured now would be a good time to face that little piece of knowledge. The two sat in Leia's office, a common meeting place for them as Ash tried not to bombard the woman with questions. "How did Ben Solo become Kylo Ren?"
"Snoke sought him out after learning about him and his potential. He comes from quite the lineage of Force Users; strong ones." Leia explained. "His grandfather is Darth Vader; it sent concern to myself and Ben's father. Of course, it would. So, I sent him to Luke. I believed if anyone could keep him grounded it was him."
"I guess it didn't work out that way?" Ash asked, somewhat disappointedly.
Leia shook her head. "Snoke had too much of a hold on his heart. I believe he will do the right there; it's hope I've held onto for so long. As his mother, I must continue to do so."
"I want to be the one to do it." Ash said, realizing what she said without thinking it through. "I think I can bring him back. I need guidance."
"It may also help if you understood some of the history outside of all this." Leia offered, her eyes glancing to her bookshelf. "Since you helped yourself out to it before, there are many books on that shelf that have a rough history of the last thirty or so years. Take whichever you'd like."
"Thank you." Ash replied sheepishly, ignoring the slight quip in her direction from the General as she continued. "Are we going to have to fight him?"
Although the concern didn't reach Leia's face entirely, her eyes told another story. "I should like to think it will never come to that point." Always the diplomatic one. "I also understand that you're still unsure of where you belong; here or there."
"I belong in the inbetween; the grey." Ash explained with care; a small smile appearing on her lips. "I know in my heart I belong with him, but I also know I don't belong with them… or even here. I belong between it all."
Leia understood their struggle, as much as any outsider who knew could. Ash was in love with her son, a part of her son that had thought to have been long gone in her eyes. She also knew something that Ashlyn appeared to be missing; he loved her all the same. She knew it; no one who was too lost in the darkness would have ever done what he did for the girl. There was hope, and that hope rested with Ashlyn. "Take whatever you need to help you understand. I'll try my best to help when I can. However, with Commander Dameron gone… there is much at stake."
Ash nodded. "We should hear from him soon, right?"
"If it all goes according to plan." Leia confirmed. "The Force will guide him, as it guides you and the rest of us."
She frowned. "I'd like to know where it's guiding me without all this confusion."
Leia chuckled. "Wouldn't we all."
"How come you never trained in the Force?"
"I did." Leia answered. "I was Luke's first apprentice. However, training with the Force and continuing in politics was nearly impossible. It wasn't much after I became pregnant with Ben anyway. It was just never meant to be."
"I wish I had the luxury of deciding if I wanted to train with the Force or not." Leia gave her a quizzical look as Ash explained further. "Your son is a pain in the ass; when he wants someone to do something, he gets them to do it. And thus my training in the Force."
Leia laughed. "I can only imagine." Ash began to accept just how much she enjoyed Leia's company. Now that she knew a sliver of the truth; she felt as though she could talk to Leia. Leia held very little back from her; she felt she didn't need to. Both found comfort in that afternoon, Ash being able to learn and understand more about Kylo Ren and Leia finally being able to talk about the son she missed. There was hope; hope that unfortunately could never last.
Poe was dragged by two storm troopers over to the man in all black with the silver slotted helmet. The shot from his blaster lingering and buzzing in the air as they walked passed. How he could stop a blast mid air was unbelievable. It made sense though; this was the ruthless Kylo Ren. However, he was too late. Poe had sent BB-8 off into the desert with the piece of the map when the attack on Tuanul came. The monster had just killed Lor San Tekka when Poe immediately fired on him. And thus, here they were.
Poe was thrown down before the masked monster, Kylo leaned down to look at him. "So, who talks first? Do you talk first or do I talk first?" He asked sarcastically.
Kylo's glare was unmatched, although Poe couldn't see it. Ren had an immediate and warranted (although, that could be argued) hatred for the prisoner in front of him. Without much effort, he skimmed the surface of his mind. The old man gave the map to you… he thought to himself. He would have ripped the information right then and there; kill him and be over with it in the most unceremonious way. This waste of life didn't deserve his attention. But, something else flashed in his mind. Ashlyn. It was then, Kylo Ren decided he was going to make this man's life hell. What he did to Taka would be nothing compared to what he was going to do to this Resistance scum. "Take him onboard." The distorted voice snarled.
The Troopers grabbed Poe once more and began to drag him to the ship. "Sir." Captain Phasma walked over to Kylo Ren. "The villagers?" She asked for her next set of instructions.
Kylo Ren was not in a particularly good mood that day, and that man thinking of Ashlyn only made it worse. "Kill them all." He said with no emotion before storming back to his ship.
A beat of hesitation came from Phasma as she turned to her troops. "On my command."
The entire village of Tuanul was slaughtered.
She remembered this moment; in very fine detail and yet still she couldn't understand how she had missed what it had truly meant. Her last day on StarKiller was not planned, at least in any sense she could fathom. He had stormed into the room, clearly aggravated and unnerved by something. And though he said it was nothing she should worry about, Ashlyn soon learned that Kylo Ren never truly meant it. He never meant a lot of things except the occasional slip of emotion when it came to her.
That night seemed like any other night; quiet and yet, a hindering and eerie calmness that Ashlyn chose to blatantly ignore. Now looking back on it, she shouldn't have.
"I think I want to go back to Maridun." She explained somewhat absentmindedly as she leaned up against the man with the perfect dark locks. They two had been lounging on the couch, his back pressed against the arm of the piece of furniture as Ashlyn rested up against his chest. He was good to control his heart beats, nothing seemed out of the ordinary inside or out, not that Ashlyn could recall. It was an ordinary day. "I feel like I had better focus there." She admitted, tilting her head just enough to look up at him.
He met her gaze, his dark and intense eyes giving nothing and yet everything away. "We could." Ren agreed. "It may be a while though."
She shrugged. "That's fine. I know we have a lot going on now." Without much fanfare, his hand found her red locks and he began to slowly brush through her hair. She relaxed again against his chest, feeling herself growing just a little more tired than she realized. "Kylo?" He hummed in response. "What happens after?"
"After what?" He asked.
"All of this." She explained just a little more. "When everything changes and a new order comes, what happens then?"
Kylo Ren thought for a moment, taking this time to careful cater the answer without giving too much or too little. He promised her he'd stop doing that. "We change the galaxy." It was a simple answer, but a necessary one. "For the better."
"But who determines that?" She inquired. "Who runs this new galaxy; is it you?"
He smirked. "That'd be nice."
Ash groaned. "That would be awful."
"How so?"
Ash looked up at him again; stars he was attractive. "You'd make up ridiculous rules, like not wearing red on Thursdays or everyone has to hop on one leg for an hour each day."
He rolled his eyes playfully. "Perhaps I could have a rule where everyday Ashlyn Novafall has to clean the toilets in each sector of StarKiller, even the Troopers barracks."
Ash gasped, feigning insult as she sat up. "You're a cruel and unkind leader."
Kylo Ren grinned wickedly. "Then you shouldn't question me and how I rule things."
"I'll start my own uprising." Ash explained. "Kick you out of power and take over; everyone can get free lunches on Fridays." He gave her a pointed look. "I'd be the best leader."
Without much warning, Kylo Ren tackled Ashlyn, forcing her onto her back as the two now lied horizontally on the couch. Ash was lost in a fit of giggles as Kylo Ren rested on his elbows, looking down at her. "With such kindness as yours, you'll never overthrow me."
Ash was still beaming. "Sure I can." She explained, leaning up to peck his lips. "You're powerless against me, you know? I can just smile and you'll give up."
She wasn't completely right, but she wasn't exactly wrong either. He hesitated then, looking down at her and searching her face for answered he didn't have. Ashlyn thought she had overstepped her boundaries with her little joke until he leaned down and kissed her. It was desperation in its finest form and yet Ashlyn was too blind to see it. While, she felt something was different, she couldn't place it. Then again, perhaps she had always known and was just too stubborn to admit that he could simply send her away. Sure, there were things she didn't understand then; things she wish she had, but selfishly she just wanted to be happy and she wanted to be happy with him.
"We should get some sleep." He said abruptly, pulling her from thought. "We have a busy day tomorrow."
She didn't try to argue it then, though now she realized she should have. If she had just taken the moment to fight back for an answer. Maybe things would be different. Knowing Kylo Ren, it might not have mattered in the slightest. However, at least she could say she tried.
The next part, she remembered clearly. How quickly they had gone to bed without ceremony. She lied down next to Kylo Ren like she had done for the previous months and he wrapped his arm around her tightly; like he never wanted to let go. He would and everything would fall apart.
Ash woke up not much after that point in her dream. She felt neither sad nor happy with reliving that moment. However, it only made her realize just how blind she had been to everything around her. The signs had been there that something was indubitably wrong and yet she ignored them without much of a second glance.
Some part of her wanted to believe in Kylo Ren; that he was actually doing this for them. Whatever was going on would ultimately be for their gain. Perhaps things would be okay and maybe, just maybe, they could reconnect. A moment of hope washed through her being at the possibility that she and Kylo Ren could be reunited soon.
And almost as immediate as the feeling came; it was gone and soon Ash was brought back to the reality of the base. There was a massive wall of fear that abruptly came over the base, uncertainty… something was wrong and Ash knew it. "Poe…" She quickly got out of bed, got dressed and ran out the door.
Whispers turned into rumors; fear fueled the base as doubt overtook the once hopeful Resistance. Poe was missing; that was the only known fact. Ash ran as fast as her feet could take her to the communications hub. She felt the distress in the galaxy; unsure if she was feeling Kylo Ren or Poe, or even perhaps the rogue person that had reached out earlier. Either way, she had a bad feeling it was between the two men in her life and that the two had met, which could only end horribly.
Dodging Resistance members and barely making it without crashing into anyone, Ash ran for the main hub. Leia Organa looked up as the mixed presence of Ashlyn entered the room; a hint of light and dark swirling viciously as she ran over. "General." Her voice pleading as she tried to catch her breath. "Tell me he's okay."
Leia's face was stone and ungiving in any information. Her hands grasping the hub as she kept her upper body stiff. She knew she had to keep the spark alive; anything but would send the base into a frenzied panic. "We lost communications with Commander Dameron. We are unsure of his location, if he's alive or-"
"Don't say it." Ash begged; now the room was beginning to still.
"We will send recon once the immediate First Order threat is gone." Leia informed her as diplomatically as possible, now speaking to the rest of the group in the hub. "We must treat this as though the First Order has the map. We must continue on through any means necessary to get to Luke Skywalker and stop the First Order. It's what Poe Dameron would want."
The Resistance members immediately snapped into action; they had a job to do. Everyone did. Ashlyn, however, was displeased. "So, we're just going to let Poe die out there with no plan to rescue him?"
Leia sighed. "We need to wait for a clear passage to investigate what happened on Jakku. I cannot afford to send any more men out there."
Ash frowned. "But you can afford to gamble with one man's life?"
"Poe Dameron is a hero of the Resistance. He knew the repercussion of this mission; he knew what was at stake and without hesitation he did what he thought was best for the Resistance." Leia explained, her tone harsh, but necessary. She knew Ashlyn was upset, they all were. However, as the General, she had to keep the base going. Even if that meant giving the hard answers no one else wanted to hear.
Although unsatisfied, Ash sharply turned and exited the communications hub. If Leia wasn't going to do anything about Poe Dameron, she was. Ash stormed her way to the empty field, her usual go to place to concentrate and practice with the Force. "What are you thinking?" Anakin asked, walking by her side as Ash exited the main base.
"If I can reach out to Kylo Ren; who's to say I can't do the same and reach out to find Poe."
Anakin pursed his lips. "And if he's dead?"
"Then I'll know." Ashlyn stated. "Knowing is better than wondering. If he's not dead, perhaps I can find out where he is and we can rescue him."
"Sometimes, knowing is not for the better." Anakin wisely reminded her. "You could be opening Pandora's box. What if you don't even reach him and reach someone else?"
Ash planted her boots on the ground, standing in the field as she inhaled deeply in an attempt to level her breathing. "And if I do nothing; I'm just as bad as everyone else." Anakin said nothing more as Ashlyn closed her eyes in an attempt to reach out through the Force to find Poe.
"A pilot." The distorted voice mocked as Poe finally came to. He was strapped down onto an interrogation chair aboard the Finalizer. He remembered coming on board and realizing just how unprepared the Resistance was for all that the First Order had in their arsenal. Then, almost as immediately as he entered this room, he was out. "Best in the Resistance. I'm ashamed I didn't find you more accomodating quarters." Kylo Ren was sitting across from him; ready to end the Resistance scum before him. No. He was going to have fun with this.
There was a sick and twisted tone that came through even with the distortion. Yet, Poe was a hero. He would not be shaken by some First Order dog. Even if that dog had a reputation and was currently not on any leash. "I'm not afraid of you."
He exhaled, the mask making a hissing noise. "You should be." His movements sharp as he stood up straight now, towering over the man in the chair. His arm outstretched. Poe began to feel an intense pressure in his mind as his body pulled forward. "The map is with a droid." Kylo answered boredly. Poe wasn't as strong minded as he thought; he was no match for Kylo Ren. "A BB-unit." He'd seen that particular droid before in Ashlyn's dreams.
Poe yelled, trying to hold onto the information. It was too late, Kylo Ren got what he wanted. Poe's body flew back into the chair with a thud. His breathing labored. He knew he was going to die here; he was prepared for it. What brought him down most was knowing he broke his promise to Ash. He thought about that moment, the last time he saw her. He promised her he'd come back; hugging her as he did. That pleasant thought immediately broken up as an intense pain shot through his head. Unable to control it; Poe began to scream. The pain ripping through his entire being.
There she was, his redhead, in the mind of this unworthy creature. How dare he think of her; the audacity of this peon to have her smile come across his mind. A promise? The pilot had promised her that he'd return in one piece. He'd have something to say about that. He'd send him back in a million pieces when he was through.
Kylo Ren stopped; his arm still outstretched as he turned his head to the what was once an empty part of the interrogation room. Ash had projected there; her face twisting in horror as she looked from the man in black to the man in the chair. Poe's nose was bleeding now from the sheer force Kylo pushed on him. Ash's voice in a panic as she looked back at Kylo. "Don't do this..."
Kylo kept looking at her; and although she couldn't see his face, she had an awful feeling he was enjoying this; smirking even. He only confirmed that when Poe began screaming in pain again. Ash realized, he wasn't doing this for information or for the First Order. He was torturing Poe because of her. For the first time in a long time, Kylo Ren saw a familiar look in her eyes. A look he hadn't seen in so long; not since their first encounter. Hate. He saw raw and untamable hatred that only grew worse the more Poe Dameron screamed in agony.
With an aggravated grunt, Kylo snapped his head back in Poe's direction. With one last thrust, Poe's body flew back once more against the chair. His breathing labored, his head throbbing. Kylo looked back at Ash; the only exchange between them was a harsh darkness that rivaled one another's. He watched Ashlyn pull from the darkness; he had done that. He made her do that. Without another word, Kylo Ren turned on his heels and marched out of the interrogation room, leaving Poe Dameron's fate up in the air as Ashlyn stood there helplessly.
Two things happened in that moment; Ashlyn was reminded of Kylo Ren's true nature. But, the even more interesting thing that would help change the course of this war. Ashlyn Novafall finally picked a side. She was going to join the Resistance and stop the First Order; she swore it.
For Poe Dameron, for so many other innocents caught up in this war, and yes; even for Kylo Ren. Just another victim of this awful galaxy and what Snoke had done to him. Ashlyn Novafall was now a Rebel Scum.
Final Thought: Oh, don't worry. We haven't seen the last of jealous Kylo Ren. Trust me. Also, good on Ash for finally picking a damn side for once! Anyway, happy new year, remember to review and see y'all next time!