A/N: Still don't own Harry Potter. Sorry for the delay with this chapter! Getting it edited down took forever and I wasn't sure when I was done with it, it was difficult to figure out a good stopping point. I hope you enjoy! Will write for comments! Just kidding, but comments do keep me motivated! Thank you lovely readers!
Saturday morning Hermione woke late and walked out into the living room to find Elfie, her barn owl, pecking at the window. The house was quiet, there was no sign that Ron had ever returned home the previous night.
She padded over to retrieve the mail and give Elphie a treat. The owl cooed and plucked the treat from Hermione's hand, nipped her affectionately and then settled into her cage in the corner.
Hermione stuck the stack of mail under her arm and made her way into the kitchen where she prepared a cup of tea. She leaned against the counter and flipped through the usual bills, papers, magazine, advertisements, and at the bottom of the stack were two letters.
One, she could tell from the familiar handwriting on the front, was from Ron. The other was a thick green parchment with thin, sharp handwriting. She set the latter off to the side and tore into Ron's letter. It was only a few lines but it proved her suspicions correct.
H,
Stayed the night at Harry's Taking Rosie to breakfast in Diagon. Harry coming with. Ginny making dinner tonight, said to invite you. The usual time.
R
She had a feeling this trip to Diagon was more about spoiling Rose with Quidditch supplies than it was about breakfast, but she couldn't find it inside herself to care. Ron had always felt like he had to prove his love for his daughter by buying her things that his parents couldn't afford to purchase him as a child. Hermione could see how flawed that idea was but she knew better than to say anything. Somethings you just have to work through for yourself.
She finished her tea, poured herself another cup and cooked up some sausage and toast before curiosity got the best of her and she reached for the green envelope. Sliding her finger carefully under the simple green wax seal she slid the letter out and choked on her tea.
Granger,
Enjoyed seeing you last night at The Dragon's Nest. I have a business venture I would like to consult with you on. Monday, same place, same time?
P.S. If you are driven there for whatever reason before then and crave some company, just write Malfoy Business Ventures as the address and it should reach me.
M
Hermione pushed the letter away as if it were poison.
She was thoroughly confused. They weren't friends. Sure, a few secrets had been exchanged but to actually request his company? It was unthinkable.
However, she was a bit intrigued by the business venture he spoke of. She couldn't fathom why he wanted to speak with her about any type of business, though. She worked for the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures. A desk job, at that...
Was he just trying to think of ways to see her? He couldn't be. One thing Hermione was sure of: she could not keep that letter in the house.
She extended her wand and pointed it at the exquisite parchment. She hesitated for just a moment before muttering "Incendio" and sent the paper up in flames.
Hermione took the afternoon to catch up on work. It wasn't often that she brought work home with her, simply because there wasn't much overflow.
Upon her graduation from Hogwarts, Kingsley, who had been named new Minister for Magic, offered her the same deal he had offered Ron and Harry. She could work for any department in any position she wanted.
Ron and Harry had accepted the offer without thinking twice, but it just didn't sit well with Hermione. People had died in the war. The world was forever changed. She just wanted to live life normally. It didn't feel right to benefit from such a tragedy.
So she insisted on doing things the normal way. She applied for a handful of departments and was offered interviews for all of them. She attended every interview she was offered. And at the end of every interview they told her they would be thrilled to have her on their team.
Hermione still felt a need to bring justice to creatures who were treated unfairly, so she took a position in Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures. For the first three years she worked as a file keeper. She wasn't even permitted to read the files. But she persevered and once Bryce Higgins retired she interviewed for his job as a research assistant.
It took two interviews before her boss, a grumpy old wizard named Ernest Timmons, offered her the job. That was 7 years ago.
She had been trying to get promoted to Senior Investigator for the past three years, but Ernest rejected her every time, muttering things about seniority and, much to Hermione's offense, that witches needed to know their place.
She knew a single visit to Kingsley and she could have Ernest's job if she wanted it, but she just couldn't do it. Instead she put everything into being the best researcher on the staff, going above and beyond her coworkers.
Only one time did she dare speak up, when she had to research known werewolves in Great Britain. When she questioned why the list was needed she was informed that the Wizengamot was attempting to pass a law requiring a Werewolf Registry. No real reasoning was offered, simply just for the greater good and safety of the wizarding world as a whole. Hermione took her much overdue vacation days during the two weeks that the list was being researched and refused to be involved in the case any further. A kind older witch who had been a researcher for twenty years traded Hermione the werewolf file for a file on rogue unicorns.
Truth be told, she hated her job. But she was ten years in and didn't know what else to do. Ron would never understand if she told him what was going on. He would only pressure her to speak to Kingsley. So she suffered in silence, as was becoming the norm for most things in her life.
She walked around the back of the stairs and to the side of the cottage that housed her office. Hermione set the unicorn file on the desk, settled into the wooden desk chair and flipped the file open.
A family of muggles who were camping in New Forest in Southern England had stumbled upon a herd of unicorn, much to the delight of the family's four year old daughter. Word spread and a family friend, who happened to be a squib, caught wind of the tale. She alerted the Ministry who tracked down the family and obliviated them. Now it was up to Hermione to track down where the unicorns had come from. It was not illegal to keep unicorns as pets but it certainly was frowned upon.
Based on the location of the sighting and the close proximity to a small rural wizarding community Hermione was almost positive the herd had escaped from a farm in that town. Too small to even have a name, or at least the name was long forgotten, Hermione suspected a farmer there may have inherited the herd and they must have escaped. Since it's quite scandalous to keep them captive the farmer probably chose to not alert anyone. Hermione made a note to send one of the researchers to the town to ask around, find the owner of the unicorns and explain that the Ministry had decided to relocate them to the Forbidden Forest. Hermione had her nose is about three different books, trying to find the origin of the small wizarding village when she finally heard the front door open and her daughter's joyful voice carry through the house.
Hermione closed the file and slid it in her desk drawer and walked out to greet her daughter. Rose was sitting on the couch with a pile of packages laying next to her.
"Mom, you've got to see what Dad bought me today!" She reached for the nearest package and held it up. "Two new sets of flying robes! Made from the best quality aerodynamic fabric. Wind and water resistant! It's like wearing air!" She set the robes down and picked up a rectangular box. "And this is a broom keeping kit! Dad said you bought Uncle Harry one just like it when he made seeker in first year!" She set the box aside and reached for another box, this one resembling a shoe box. "New flying boots! And here! The latest edition of Quidditch Through the Ages!" Rose threw up hands and smiled a truly radiant smile. "I just had the best day! The rest of the team is going to be so jealous!"
Hermione ran a hand through her hair and forced a smile. "Wow, that's awesome Rosie! You're all set to take the junior quidditch world by storm!"
Rose laughed and walked over to hug her mother. "I wish you could have gone, Mum." she whispered.
Hermione patted her daughter's red curls and whispered, "Quite alright, dear. We'll have our shopping day soon, promise."
Rose stepped back and nodded. "I'm going to pack all this stuff and get cleaned up. Dinner at Aunt Ginny's tonight, Mum. You're coming, right?"
She smiled at her daughter. "Of course, hun. Go get cleaned up. You've been shopping half the day. Rest for a bit, there's plenty of time before dinner. Want me to bring you up a cuppa?"
Rose was halfway up the stairs, arms piled high with packages. "Sure, Mum, that would be great."
Hermione turned to walk into the kitchen. "Rosie?" she called up the stairs. "Where's your father?"
"I think he was going straight to Uncle Harry's. He said he would see us tonight though."
"Too afraid to face me after our argument, I bet." Hermione thought as she added milk and sugar to Rose's tea. "Oh well," she muttered to herself. "At least Rose won't witness the tension between us."
She headed up the stairs with her daughter's cup and saucer, walking up the stairs and turning left. She knocked gently and then walked in and chuckled. There was Rose, fast asleep on her bed, hair splayed out around her, packages forgotten at the foot of her bed. Hermione put a warming charm on the tea so it would remain hot and tucked a blanket in over her daughter, brushing a kiss on her forehead, before creeping out of the room and softly shutting the door.
By dinner time that evening, Hermione had finished her work on the unicorn file, went down a rabbit hole of research on nearly extinct wizarding towns, changed into a teal turtleneck and jeans, and had twisted her hair into a French twist. She slid a set of silver hoops in her ears and went to wake Rose, who was still snoozing in her bed. Rose woke and dressed quickly, opting to finger comb her curls rather than fight a brush through them. Once she was ready, mother and daughter shrugged into their coats and slipped their boots on before heading the few streets over to Harry's cottage.
It was truly picturesque, right down to the white picket fence. A stone base with weathered siding, it stood two stories tall and bore a strong resemblance to the cottage Harry had lived in with his parents. Hermione and Rose walked through the gate, Hermione could feel the magic of the wards allowing their entry as they made their way up the walk and knocked on the door.
Ginny answered with Albus on her hip, the boy gnawing away at a teether.
"Come in, come in! How many times do I have to tell you that you don't need to knock!"
"About as many times as I have to tell you the same thing!" Hermione countered and opened her arms to relieve Ginny of her toddler. Ginny handed him over and he settled contentedly on Hermione's hip, gurgling and still gnawing away.
Ginny had turned to talk to Rose and Hermione heard her daughter tell Ginny all about her new equipment that she had purchased that day. She let her sister-in-law and daughter talk animatedly amongst themselves as she headed farther into the house, holding a now squirming Albus, whom Hermione set down so he could toddle back to his mother.
She found Harry in the family room, watching a muggle television. Harry had purchased one immediately after buying the house, reasoning that he had never been allowed to choose which shows to watch at the Dursleys, so he had many years of tv watching to catch up on.
"Where's Ron?" Hermione asked, and she laughed as Harry flew out of the chair and drew his wand.
"Merlin, Hermione, don't do that! Make a bit more noise next time!" Harry exclaimed, a slightly wild look in his eyes as he tucked his wand away.
Hermione chuckled. "Calm down, Harry Potter, we both know that I would win that duel."
Harry ran his hands through his messy hair and laughed. "You're forgetting, Hermione. I'm the chosen one."
Hermione smacked him on the arm. "Don't start that again!"
"Oh you know it's true," he teased, a smile causing the skin around his eyes to crinkle. "And to answer your question, I have no idea. I thought he was with you."
Hermione rolled her eyes. "He told Rosie when he brought her home from Diagon this afternoon that he was coming straight here and he would see us tonight."
"Hmm, nope. Haven't seen him. We've been here all day too."
She rolled her eyes. "Well, I'm sure he'll pop in soon. You know Ron. He never misses a meal. Especially one that he doesn't have to cook or clean up after."
Hermione chuckled, but Harry didn't return the laughter. "Is everything ok with you two? Things seemed tense last night. And then he chose to stay here instead of going home. Now we don't know where he is and you don't even seem concerned."
She lay a hand on Harry's arm and sighed. "Yes, Harry. Everything is fine. You know, things just get tense sometimes. He was angry that I didn't take him to buy Rose's first broom. He overreacted and then walked out. Sounds familiar, doesn't it? But you know Ron. He always come back, guilty and groveling."
Harry's eyes were sad as he said, "Sure, Mione. But you know, I'm here if you ever need to talk. I know things have been tense ever since that mishap a few years ago…"
"It's nothing, Harry." she said firmly, ending the conversation. "Come on," she said over her shoulder, already walking out of the room, "let's go see if Ginny needs help with dinner."
Ron arrived about ten minutes later, muttering about going into the office to squeeze in a few hours of work to make up for all the spending that weekend.
Harry looked suspicious but thankfully said nothing as they sat down to eat a wonderful roast chicken that Ginny had cooked up - a recipe passed on from Mrs. Weasley, no doubt. Ron left after dinner, claiming exhaustion from running around all day. Ginny went out with Rose for some flying before they lost all the sunlight and Harry looked at Hermione and held her gaze as though willing her to open up to him. She averted her gaze and took Albus's hand, leading him to the play room to read to him for a bit. Harry shook his head slightly and retired to the living room to watch his shows.
Hermione couldn't get enough of little Albus. His chubby hands grasped at a set of blocks, methodically piling them up in a tower before inevitably they came tumbling down and he would laugh and laugh before piling them up again and again.
I could watch him forever, she thought, reaching over to brush a few strands of hair from his eyes. It seemed forever ago that Rosie was that small. Hermione was so nervous about doing everything right that she hardly ever took time to just sit and watch Rose play. She was just starting out at the Ministry, her marriage with Ron was quite new, she was setting up the house. Looking back now she wished she would have just stopped to sit on the floor with blocks and her baby instead of all that rushing and perfecting. Especially if she had known then what she knew now.
Albus yawned and rubbed his eyes, crawling into Hermione's lap and curling up in her arms. She rocked him gently. She heard Ginny and Rose come in and the clink of cups as Ginny made them both a cup of tea. She heard footsteps down the hall and felt eyes on her as she turned and saw Ginny watching her.
"Shh", Hermione said, motioning to the half-asleep boy in her arms.
"Want me to take him?" Ginny whispered.
"No, no. You go relax. Tell Rose to hang out for a bit. I'll just get him to sleep and then we can go home."
"Thanks, Mione. You're amazing, you know that?" Ginny blew a kiss to Hermione and then one to her son before closing the door and creeping back down the hall.
Slowly, Hermione made her way to the rocking chair in the corner and rocked Albus, rubbing circles on his back and just watching his eyes flutter shut. Hermione wanted another child so badly that it hurt. She yearned for a baby in her arms, the sound of little feet down the halls and fingerprints on every surface. But alas, it just wasn't meant to be.
Hermione wiped a tear from her eye and stroked Al's cheek as she thought back to the appointment where her stupid mistake had been discovered.
Rose was three. Hermione had just been promoted to researcher, Ron's hours were more steady. She was ready to add onto the family and Ron agreed.
So they began trying.
Months went by and nothing. After six months of nothing happening, she made an appointment at St. Mungo's. They asked for family history, about Rose's pregnancy and then they got to the subject of contraception.
The sweet nurse asked if Hermione had ever used the Fertilio charm to prevent pregnancy. Hermione nodded and said that for about a year and half after Rose was born she had used the charm before being prescribed the Abortivum potion.
The nurse asked the next question gently. "Did you ever use it while intoxicated?"
Hermione thought back to her and Ron's second wedding anniversary. Harry and Ginny had watched Rose and Ron had taken her out to dinner. She had indulged in quite a bit of wine. They had to resort to taking the floo home as neither of them were sober enough to apparate. They had been intimate that night and Hermione had cast the spell on herself.
Hermione recounted the story to the nurse, who looked at her sadly. She told Hermione she would consult with the healer in charge and someone should be in to see her soon.
Hermione remembered feeling a bit nervous, but brushed it off and waited for the healer to come in. After about ten minutes an older witch who slightly resembled McGonagall knocked and then walked into the room where Hermione sat on the exam table.
"Hello, Mrs. Weasley. I'm Healer Owens and I'm one of the main healers in the fertility ward. Nurse Hintley just consulted with me about your case. I'm afraid I may have some upsetting news. When using a contraceptive charm while intoxicated, it greatly increases the chance of altering one's fertility. Slurring of words, the wrong wand movement, and the effectiveness of the spell can be altered. Unfortunately, there is no test to confirm but the fact that you had no issues conceiving with your first pregnancy and that your husband and yourself are in perfect health, plus the use of the charm in an intoxicated state being in your history, it would seem that there is some spell damage."
"What exactly does that mean, Healer Owens?"
The woman looked at her with nothing but compassion in her eyes. "'I'm afraid this all means that you no longer can conceive children, Mrs. Weasley."
And just like that, Hermione's life changed forever.
Hermione stayed like that, cradling Albus, lost deep in memories she hadn't allowed herself to think about in years, when she heard a gentle knock on the playroom door. She quickly wiped her eyes and looked up to see Harry pad quietly into the room.
"Mione? You've been back here for over an hour. Rose went home, thinking you had slipped out without her noticing and then flooed up to tell us you weren't there. When Ginny saw Albus wasn't in his crib, she realized you must still be back here." He crouched next to the rocking chair and took in her red, puffy eyes and the way she was clinging to Albus. "Do you want to talk about?" he asked gently, placing a hand soothingly on her knee.
"Talk about what, Harry? I'm fine. Just a bit tired. I guess I zoned out there for a bit." she looked back down at Albus, peacefully sleeping in her arms.
"Don't give me that, Mione. I know your history. We're not all as blind as you think us, you know. It's ok to not be strong all the time. It doesn't mean anything bad if you occasionally break down. But you need to talk to someone. If not me, then Ginny. We love you, Hermione. We've been worried about you. You're distant, Ron says some nights he will come home and you won't be there with no explanation of where you were. Let us in, Mione. We all want to help."
She reached out and put her hand on Harry's cheek, looking at him sadly. "I know, Harry. But I just...I can't talk about it. I'm afraid it's a burden that only I can carry. I'm not prepared for the chain of events that would take place if I let go and let it out."
"Have you tried talking to Ron? He's your husband. Take it from me, men can be daft sometimes but it doesn't mean we don't care. Let him in."
Her anger flared a bit but she quickly reined it in. "Oh, Harry. I have. He just doesn't get it. No matter the amount of times and different ways I have approached it. He's a good man, Harry. I know that. He just still has the emotional range of a teaspoon more often than not. And I have just learned to live with it."
Harry felt the conversation come to a close. He nodded and then gestured for Hermione to pass the still sleeping Albus over to him. She leaned in and kissed the child's forehead before placing him gently in his father's arms.
She then leaned in and gave Harry a hug. "I should get going, Harry. Thanks for the talk. I'll be ok, promise," she walked towards the playroom door. "If I don't see Ginny on my way out, tell her I love her and I'll see her this week sometime."
Harry stood, cradling his son, as he listened for the front door to click shut. He walked Albus into his room and set him gently on his toddler bed, covering him with the blanket Hermione had made for his baby shower. It was a crimson color with a golden snitch in the middle. Albus loved the blanket and never slept without it. Harry felt Ginny walk up behind him and put her arm around his waist. Resting her head on his shoulder they stood over their son and watched him for a bit.
"Did she open up to you at all?"
Harry shook his head. "No, but she was near tears when I found her in the room with Al. I don't see why Ron won't just agree to the treatment. I can't believe he doesn't see what this is doing to her."
"Well, she hid it for so long. I mean, I knew she wasn't happy but I didn't understand the extent. But then I found out from Hannah that Hermione is at the pub more nights than not. She's tried talking to Hermione too, but she says she's so guarded that even with some liquor in her she's a steel wall."
Harry slid his hand into Ginny's and led her out of Al's room and into the living room. Ginny sat and put her legs across Harry's lap. He started massaging her feet. They were quiet for a bit before Ginny spoke up.
"Harry, where do you think Ron really went today after you got back from Diagon?"
"I don't know, Gin. But I do know your brother would never, ever go into work on the weekend."
Ginny sighed. "Yes, that's what I'm afraid of."
Hermione woke Sunday and burrowed deeper under the covers before realizing what the morning held. With a small sense of dread, she threw the covers back from herself, careful not to uncover Ron and wake him. She wasn't ready to deal with him just yet.
She padded across the hall to the bathroom and turned the shower on. She methodically massaged shampoo into her hair, focusing on the task at hand, refusing to let her mind drift to steel grey eyes and raised glasses.
She heard Ron banging around in their room and quickly washed her body and conditioned her hair before turning off the water and wrapping herself in a towel. She walked into the bedroom as Ron was walking out. They passed by each other without so much as a word.
It wasn't anything abnormal. In fact, she was used to living in silence, each of them circling the other but not fully acknowledging the other, save for the spare news and family updates they passed back and forth. For whatever reason, Hermione seemed to notice the silence more so lately and she didn't know what she hated more: the silence itself or the fact that she had no desire to change it.
She magically dried her hair and applied a small amount of makeup before padding over to her closet. licking through the clothes, she decided to wear a pair of jeans and a loose white sweater. She placed a stack of slim brown bracelets on her wrist and added a coral colored infinity scarf to the ensemble. The chill in the air was becoming a constant and Hermione knew winter would be upon them soon. She slid on a pair of brown knee-high boots and then went to knock on Rose's door to wake her.
Hermione heard Rose moving around in her room so she went downstairs to have a cup of coffee and wait for her husband and daughter to finish getting ready to go.
Once everyone was ready, they walked to the living room and Hermione tapped her wand on the fireplace and muttered a spell, activating the floo network. She then tapped out a pattern on the stones above the mantle until one of the stones vanished, revealing a small box full of green powder. One by one, they all took a pinch of the powder. She placed the box back where it came from and tapped the same pattern, hiding the box from view again.
She stepped back, allowing her daughter and husband to leave first. Then she threw her pile of floo powder into the fireplace, stepped in, and shouted "The Burrow!" and with that, she was gone.