Alice sat in the police department office, ruffed up and covered in dirt, waiting for her mother to pick her up.

How had it come to this? How had she allowed this spiral to happen? She used to be such a strong, independent, and well-mannered person who always followed the rules and enforced them to her peers, making sure that her school remained respectable. She never did anything that was questionable for a proper young lady. Where had it all started?

Ah, that's right. The moment she held a electric guitar in her hands for the first time back in primary school. That was the moment that her second persona was created.

Before then she had only played classical instruments such as the violin, flute, and cello. Her mother never let her go anywhere near ruffian's instruments, as she called drum sets, electric guitars and the such. Alice had been content with the instruments she played, taking great joy in the violin most of all. Then in the late autumn of her final year in primary school her family had taken her to celebrate Gilbert Beilschmidt's fourteenth birthday, before they were friends and only acquaintances. There, when almost all the guests had died out and went home, She and Kiku decided to take a wander through their mansion. They had accidentally stumbled upon their basement recording room, since their family owns a record company. There it was that she had seen and held her first electric guitar. Gilbert had later found them and showed her how to strum a few cords, and she instantly fell in love, and despite her mother's words Alice went and bought her own electric guitar, which she named Jack because it had a union jack print on it, the following week. She had asked Kiku to hold onto it for her, since she knew with would be too risky to keep it in her own home.

From then on she would go over to Gilbert's weekly to learn from him, never telling her mother the true reason behind these visits, saying she was asked to teach Ludwig violin. While she did actually give Ludwig a few lessons, they never stayed on it for too long and she would instead continue with her own lessons soon after they arrived. After three months Alice had begun to show natural talent and had surpassed Ludwig, who had been learning for two years prior to her, after eight months she had surpassed her teacher, Gilbert.

When it came around to graduation Alice had started to look into different music school, wanting to follow a career as a musician instead of moving on to secondary at the Academy. However her mother found out about her plans and forbid her to play any instruments, even her violin, because she thought that it had deluded her mind. Luckily though she never found out about the electric guitar, and Alice turned to entrust her most treasured possession with whom she trusted with her very life, with Kiku. When she moved up to her first year of secondary education at the academy she cornered the entire election of the student body to become president, ensuring her unanimous inauguration. But at the time she cared not about being student council president, it was what her mother had told her to do, so she went through with it. Anything to turn her mother's attention away from her practices, so she also became head of the discipline committee to make her seem busy. It worked like a freaking charm, whenever she had to go to practice she'd simply tell her mother that she had work with the government or the committee. Now she was able to practice her guitar almost whenever she wanted.

In November of that same year, Gilbert had appeared to a "lesson" (they weren't really lessons anymore since she was better than him, but he simply taught her new songs) with news from a buddy that there was an underground stage show for amateur bands. He pitched in the idea that the four of them should start a band. At first she was unsure about it because she risked being caught in a druggie environment surrounded by illegal substances in an abandoned but privately owned building. Kiku backed her up and said it was fine if she didn't want to do it and that he'd stick by her if she didn't. But Gilbert wouldn't take no for an answer and practically forced, more like pathetically beg, them to play at least one song there. After some heavy consideration, she caved and agreed.

Alice will never forget how she felt when she first stepped up in the spotlight in front of about two hundred people, wearing clothes that her mother had raised her to detest. Gilbert was their singer at the time, singing while he played the drums. They were well received right off the bat and were called back for several encores until they ran out of songs they knew how to play. That feeling she got up on stage doing the most forbidden gave her a sort of thrill that made her feel alive, awake, and… free! The feeling of doing something she wanted for once became addicting and pulled her back over and over again until it was a weekly thing. And that's how England came to be. Gilbert had said that a stage name made the sound cooler and more mysterious, but Alice embraced her new name as if it was another person entirely, and she was. England was the exact opposite of Alice, and everything she wanted to be. England didn't abide by the rules, nor did she give two shits to what anyone expected of her, she was free and her own person, and the crowd seemed to love it. England became a sort of alter ego that Alice could simply switch with whenever she needed a relief, just simply put on a wig and change her clothes and she was another person entirely. Alice began to rely on the band to feel control over her life, but that could only last so long.

So when she was left as Alice, she decided to gain control in dominating over the entire student body, ruling the school with an iron fist and strong will. That's when she was labeled the iron-hearted queen of World W Academy, some saw her as a tyrant and others as fair and just. But that mattered little too her, as long as she exercised some form of control in her life she didn't care what others saw in her, except for her mother.

It seemed that no matter what she did, she could never take off the leash he mother had wrapped so tightly around her neck, making her feel less than a dog in her presence. None of her accomplishments in school ever appeased her mother, she never seemed to be enough. So she turned to her music, the only place she felt like she was someone worthy of praise. The band had always been her safe haven.

Until now.

Now all it reminded her of was he greatest mistake, and her greatest regret.

There she sat it the changing room unable to change out of he school uniform, unable to become England, to put on her mask. Now he alter ego was beginning to shatter, leaving who she truly was to shine through: a scared and cowardly little girl unable to face her problems. She simply stared at herself in the mirror, broken and without strength to start again.

'I never should have agreed to that date.' Alice hissed in her head. 'If I had just refused his game then I wouldn't be feeling this way.' She felt stupid like an idiotic child, letting a boy get in the way of the one thing that had ever gave her freedom.

"Alice-chan?" A gingerly knock came at the closet door. "Are you ready?"

Alice peeled her eyes away from her reflection to turn to the door, peering at it as if her best friend were right in front of her.

"I don't think I can do this." She breathed out in a shaky voice, her internal struggle apparent in her own voice.

"...Can I come in?" His voice came again through the metal door.

"...Sure.."

Slowly the door was peeled open, and Kiku stepped into her line of sight. He stared at her with his dark dull eyes that somehow always managed to shine brightly. "Still too soon?" Kiku asked in a soft voice. Alice looked down at her feet and nodded. It was the second Friday after the harsh breakup, in her opinion, too long to be away, but too soon to get back on stage.

Kiku gave her a gentle and understanding smile, walking into the closet with the door closing behind him.

"It's okay if you need a little more time to heal, I'm sure Ludwig-san and Gilbert-san will understand."

"But I don't want to give up my life to grief, I want to continue living!" Alice argued in a small voice, "I just don't know how to."

Kiku calmly reached out his hands and pulled her into his arms, enveloping her in a comforting embrace.

"Sometimes when we've barred to much strife we come to a point when we can't carry anymore. You mustn't push yourself to be what other expect of you, let yourself heal. Gilbert-san and Ludwig-san will understand." Kiku whispered into her hair while rubbing her back, soothing the sobs that she was unable to hold back.

Really. What did she do to deserve someone so great, understanding, and selfless as Kiku? It made Alice feel horrible that she couldn't return his feelings, she was still shocked to find out that her best friend had been in love with her since they were twelve. But he was selfless enough to do what would make her happy and watch from the sidelines as she was with Alfred. Alice didn't deserve his love or his friendship, she feared that one day his love may leave him heartbroken enough to leave her, yet he promised that would never happen when she expressed that fear.

"Thank you." She murmured into his shoulder, "For everything."

"Of course." Kiku smiled at her as he pulled away to gaze at her, "Now let's get you home."

Alice was about to tell him that she wanted to stay for the show, but was suddenly interrupted by the loud yell of a man near the back of the crowd.

"THE COPS ARE HERE! THE COPS ARE HERE!"

And just like that, everything fell apart. Apparently there was a rat about a drug deal that was taking place at the warehouse which led them to the bash, calling in reinforcement by the number of druggies all trespassing on private property, illegally selling pot, drugs, and alcohol. And even though Alice had never been apart of that crowd, she found herself running from two cops in an alleyway with Kiku. They dodged around dumpsters, trash cans, and cardboard boxes, coming up to a metal fence that cut them off. They both quickly began to climb up the criss-crosses of the metal fence, Kiku making it over and waiting for her to come down, but her foot slipped and sent her back over to the side of the police.

"Alice-chan!" Kiku yelled, making him way back up the fence. However, with one powerful kick to the base, Alice sent Kiku tumbling back.

"Go!" She yelled at him as the cops pounced on her.

"But-"

"Get out of here!" She screamed at him, kicking the fence again. This time he finally listened, running away from the scene before the cops were able to identify him.

And that's what led her to where she was, sitting alone in the police department being interviewed by cops and being checked if she had any form of alcohol or drug in her system, which turned out negative. They had ended up calling her parents to come and pick her up, surprised when they learned who they were since they were very influential people. In fact, if her mother wanted to, she could remove this entire event from her permanent record.

Twenty painstakingly long minutes passed until her mother finally arrived, her brother Dylan in tow for obvious reasons, as he was probably the only one who could get her to talk. When she walked in she didn't even look at Alice, and simply addressed the officer and signed the paperwork to have her released, then walked back to the car as if she hadn't been sitting there the entire time.

"Come on." Dylan offered a hand to Alice, which she gladly took to stand up and follow them both to the car waiting for them outside.

"Dylan, pregúntale a esa chica por qué estaba en prisión." (Dylan, ask that girl why she was in prison.) Her mother said in Spanish once they were all in the car. Dylan looked annoyed with their mother, but did not refuse her, and with a heavy sigh he did what he was told.

"¿Que pasó?" (What happened) Dylan asked, turning to her.

"Fui atrapado traspasando una propiedad privada en el distrito de almacenes." (I was caught trespassing on private property in the warehouse district.)

"¿Por qué?" (Why?)

Alice couldn't manage to lie, but she also couldn't risk her music and freedom, even though she probably already lost both. So she chose to stretch the truth.

"Fui invitado a una fiesta. No sabía que era ese tipo de fiesta". (I was invited to a party. I didn't know it was that kind of party.)

Out of nowhere, her face was met with a stinging slap from her mother's hand, which sent her recoiling back into her seat. Stunned by her mother's actions, Alice brought her own hand over her bruising cheek and Dylan leaned over her, shielding her from anymore of their mother's wrath.

"¡Eres una niña estúpida e idiota!" (You stupid, idiotic little girl!) Mrs. Kirkland shouted at Alice in fury, losing her composure. "¡Podrías haber arruinado la vida que hice para ti! ¿Qué universidad querría tomar en un delincuente?" (You could have ruined the life I made for you! What University would want to take in a felon?)

Alice looked down to her lap, unable to meet her mother's disappointed and scolding gaze she knew she was wearing.

"Madre-" (Mother-) Dylan tried to intrude, but was swiftly cut off.

"¡Calla! ¿Por qué no puedes seguir las órdenes más simples? ¡Eres una niña inútil!" (Be quiet! Why is it that you can't follow the simplest of orders? You useless child!)

Alice closed her eyes and curled in on herself into a tight ball, to which her mother began to yell at her for looking so pathetic and forced her to sit upright. Alice obeyed every command, too afraid of what her mother might think or say if she dared not listen to her. For the rest of the car ride home, her mother did nothing but lecture her and call her names. She claimed that she did this to make her stronger and wiser, so that she would never make this mistake again, but Alice felt as if this was purely to make her into what her mother had always treated her as: a doll. A doll for her to play life with, making all the decisions for her, dressing her up and trapping her inside the mansion.

Her mother demanded her to tell her which friends had brought her to that "party". Alice couldn't lie with the collar around her neck, but she could not betray her closest friends. If she found out that Kiku had been there with her, she would most surely ban him from her life. She didn't want to pick favorites, but at this point she was given no other choice. She told her it was Gilbert who had invited her, and just like she thought, her mother removed the "bad influence" from her life, even calling the Beilschmidts to tell them that their oldest son was no longer allowed anywhere near her daughter (doll).

When they arrived home it was announced that she was grounded for the next three months, going halfway into her summer break, with a curfew of 4:30. Alice sat by as her world fell apart in front of her as the words from her mother's mouth formed, but she didn't do anything, a doll was not allowed such an ability.

Collapsing in her room on her 600 pound alpaca wool center rug, Alice gazed at her cage, expensive decor and trinkets everywhere, all of them beautiful, all of them useless, like her. Not having the will or strength to go to her 1,500 pound queen sized bed, Alice laid herself down on her rug and began to cry.

This was the death of England. The death of her freedom. The one thing Alice had ever cherished enough to risk betraying her mother over, was now lost. Maybe she was being overly dramatic, maybe she was being a brat whining over her band when she was surrounded by such riches and luxury, but money mattered little to her, it always had. What was the point of having fancy clothes, expensive jewelry, and a big room if the only thing she could not have was freewill? It was a gorgeous prison, but a prison no less.

Wiping the tears off her face, Alice pulled out her phone and sent a text to the band's group chat. Might as well let them know what happened to her.

You: My mother has forbidden me to see you Gilbert, she thinks you're the one who took me to the warehouse where the cops showed up.

Gilbert: Figures, my folks just said I can't see you anymore as well.

Ludwig: Will you still be able to come to practice?

You: No, I've been grounded for the next three months. Band Bash is off for me.

Gilbert: That's fine. We'll just pick up where we left off once you're free.

You:...Might as well find a new guitarist, I don't think I'll ever be free again.

Gilbert: Wait Alice, whadda mean?

Ludwig: I'm sure this will be resolved eventually.

Gilbert: Alice?

Gilbert: You still there?

Alice didn't respond back, she didn't know what else to say. She could never go back to Bash now that she had lost England forever. She lost the side of her that felt real, the side that allowed her to let loose and have fun. From now on she'd only Alice: a cold queen chess piece in her mother's hands.

A private message from Kiku caught her eye.

Kiku: Are you sure about this?

You: I have no choice. I have to obey what she says.

Kiku: Then I'll make the choice for you. Meet me outside the music room before class on monday.

…

Two days later, after a long and dull weekend of her being locked up in her room, Alice did as her best friend had told her and immediately made her way to the center building. As she walked through the court yard, she kept her head down, without energy to be bothered with any antics of the hooligans around her, instead she simply envied their youthful ways and let them be, which didn't go unnoticed by watching eyes as they expected her to snap at them at any moment, and was surprised when she made no move to lecture or give them trouble.

Walking up the stairs and entering the building, the queen made her way over to where her best friend should be waiting for her. When she arrived, she saw him standing by himself in the hallway in front of the door that led into the music room, holding the case that usually held her electric guitar.

"Kiku?" Alice called in confusion and curiosity as she made her way over to him. "What's this?"

"I managed to retrieve Jack from the warehouse where you left him. I know you're forbidden from the band, so I thought I could leave it here in the music room and you could play while you're at school." Kiku explained as he took the union jack printed guitar out of its case and held it out to her.

"Kiku, you know I've been forbidden from music." Alice told him in a regretful tone.

"Alice-chan, you've been banned from music for the past two years. Why are you giving in now?" Kiku questioned, and eyebrow raised in skepticism.

"Because… I was England then, she knew how to break the rules. Alice can't do that." She reasoned.

"Alice-chan, I have told you once and a thousand times. England doesn't exist, it's all you. You're the one who snuck out to play with the band, you're the one who once joined into a mob just for fun and broke some guy's nose-" Alice could have swore she heard a distant muffled chuckle then, but she brushed it off as nothing, "You did all this and more, England has always just been a mask to hide your fears, but you don't need it. You are strong enough on your own."

"But my mother-"

"Forget your mother. She claims she knows best, but if that were true she'd let you have your freedom. Take it," Kiku held her guitar out to her once again. "You want to be a musician, hai?"

Alice looked down at her most prized possession and saw her own reflection. Her fear and uncertainty were clear on her face, but so was her desire, her need for freedom and control. The side of her which England manifested as must have not died completely, because she found herself smirking as she took Jack into her hands. Putting the strap over her shoulder, Alice relaxed her muscles and let her fingers roam over the strings. Letting go, she began to play the beginning cords to one of her favorite songs.

This was the freedom she so craved, to let her soul get lost in her music. Alice looked over at Kiku and smiled warmly.

"Thank you, Kiku." She told him gratefully. "Now let's go inside the music room, I still don't think its proper for the student council president to play in the hallway." Alice laughed.

"Yes, let's." Kiku smiled back as they made their way into the empty music room.

Down the hall, a certain American stepped out of his hiding place once he was sure they were gone. He could not help the slight smile that made its way to his lips as he walked away.

He always loved the way she played.

.

.

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Once again, I hate her mother. Alfred still hasn't forgiven her, but he understands her reasoning a bit more. More on that next chapter. About maybe five chapters left. I'm on break now so I'll be ble to write more, see you soon!

Ps, when I said pounds I meant the currency.

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