Happy 5th of July!

I would say 4th, but it's the 5th now. I was busy both blowing shit up and going to work yesterday.

Let's do a check: Count your fingers. If you still have all of them, you've passed the 4th of July initiation. And you can be our friend.

Mia-Teresa-Davenport: *Rolls up newspaper and smacks her with it* "Stop attacking him."

ShyMusic: Yes. Yes, you do.

So let's get on with it. Oly?

"Zara doesn't own Lab Rats or anything you recognize. If you don't recognize it, it's probably hers."

"If ever you feel like an animal among men, be a lion."

Criss Jami, Diotima, Battery, Electric, Personality

"Earthquakes just happen. Tornadoes just happen. Your tongue does not just happen to fall into some other girls mouth!"

Gemma Halliday, Deadly Cool (Deadly Cool, #1)

Chase

I might have made either the biggest miscalculation or most effective rallying call ever.

What do I mean by that?

Well, the demons that were helping me brought friends. Then their friends brought friends. And those friends brought more friends and the occasional curious or annoyed Summoner.

Because of this, by the time twilight was upon us, the back yard had demons everywhere. I couldn't even see the grass near the porch!

"And you wanted to control these guys," Douglas snorted from his seat beside me. In his lap, Oly was lapping up Bit-O-Honey candies Adam had gotten to cheer her up and nipping at one of her many bandages from time to time. She and Yahn had looked worse off than they were before the blood was washed away. However they got the powder off, they apparently did it very quickly. The most devastating wound between the two was on Oly's vanity.

All the rhinestones on her wings had fallen off with the blood that was washed away.

I growled at Douglas a bit. "I can handle this."

No, you can't, my voice cut in. Summoners almost control demons. You don't.

Nay-sayer.

"Hey!"

I perked my ears at the bold Summoner that spoke. "What?"

"If you're master is going to do something, then get him to do it," she huffed. "I have things to do."

"I have no master," I growled.

This was met with quite a bit of laughter from both demons and Summoners. I pinned my ears. Was it really so ridiculous a notion that a demon could exist without a master? Soad had no master when he took Krane over. However, she was right. It was time to get this over with. "Okay, everybody: Listen up. I'm sure your friends told you that -"

"Why aren't you controlling him?" interrupted a second Summoner, pointing at Douglas. "He's yours, isn't he?"

Douglas rolled his eyes, setting Oly down and standing up, leaning close to me. "We won't ever reach them. These Councilors don't listen to demons, the demons barely listen to you, and they sure as hell aren't going to listen to me because I'm not their Master."

Quietly, I growled. "They'll listen."

"Like you got a small group to listen earlier?" Douglas snorted. "They botched the whole mission. Now, there are a lot more. It's not going to turn out any better."

I glared at the crowd, noting that a few more powerful demons were making disrespectful gestures at me. "You have a better idea?"

"I do," Douglas responded. "This army needs a leader who you can't defy. Not without serious consequence."

I rolled my eyes. "And who would that be?"

Douglas shivered a bit. "Someone who strikes terror and dread in everyone they see. Someone who isn't afraid to get violent."

"You still didn't tell me who," I hissed, getting frustrated.

"Let's play a guessing game," Douglas said with a grin, obviously enjoying my increasing impatience. "Kevin and I borrowed a couple of rings from Tasha. Who would we need to convince that we're married, even though we're not?"

I threw my hands up a bit. "I don't know. Who would care that you're..." I trailed off as it clicked. Douglas would only try to convince someone he was permanently locked down if telling them off wasn't enough to stop their advances.

There was only one person I knew who was that persistent.

I felt the blood drain from my face. "No..."

Douglas nodded grimly. "Yes."

"You wouldn't-"

"I would. Have to make sacrifices sometimes."

"You couldn't find anyone else?"

Douglas sighed. "If I could, I'd take them in a heartbeat."

I felt a pitiful whimper rise in my throat. "But-"

I was interrupted by the crowd's protests this time. They seemed to part like the Red Sea as someone shoved through them, obviously storming towards us. Halfway through this march, my eyes detected Kevin, who had sat on the front lawn to avoid Eddy ever since he woke up a few hours earlier no matter how much we assured him that Eddy had been turned off. He had undoubtedly walked all the way around the house to get to the back yard.

His more-than-irate expression made me think that Douglas was about to be chewed out.

When Kevin finally reached the porch, he climbed up the stairs and walked up to Douglas, crossing his arms. "Douglas, who is Perry and why in the hell does she think you're dating her?"

Before Douglas could explain, the voice of Satan herself reached my ears from behind us. "Dougie!"

Perry came barreling through the back doors, enveloping Douglas in a bone-crushing hug.

In the doorway, Mr. Davenport was dusting his shirt off, regaining his balance. "I tried to stop her, but...yeah..."

Douglas struggled to pry her off. "I have a husband," he lied.

Yes, lied. They weren't even engaged.

"Nonsense," Perry responded easily. We can elope. He'll get over it."

"Kiss my ass, lady," Kevin snapped irritably.

Perry narrowed her eyes at Kevin, letting Douglas go. As Dougie sucked in several large, grateful breaths, Perry poked Kevin's chest. "Your days with him are numbered, and I know a great place to hide things. Don't ever talk to me like that again."

She followed that up with a few derogatory slurs about sexuality, but I'll leave those out. I'm a classy guy, and this is a somewhat classy story, after all.

It was after Mr. Davenport talked Douglas - and Kevin - out of beating the crap out of Perry that she finally seemed to notice that the yard was full of some of the strangest creatures that should never have escaped from nightmares. She frowned and stared for a long moment before she found her voice. "What's with the hideous costumes? And why do you have cat ears?"

"They're demons," Douglas hissed between his teeth, obviously regretting his decision to call Perry. "Those aren't costumes. They're real."

"And may they eat you, bitch," Kevin muttered almost silently.

Can you please eat her? She's annoying.

I suppressed a grin.

Perry snorted. "Demons. Right. Let me guess: They're dangerous. They'll tear up Mission Creek High if I don't do something about them and the students they come with."

I frowned. "Where'd you hear that?"

Perry rolled her eyes. "Some idiot came by my office the other day babbling about demons and demon hunters. I tuned out about halfway through before I kicked him out. He started to annoy me."

"Brian," Kevin supplied. "I don't like him. He expects everything to go his way all the time." Then, he grinned a bit, looping his arm a bit possessively around Douglas' shoulders. "He was pissed that you didn't believe him. Stomped around, demanding that we storm the school until James told him to leave and come back when he was over his, quote, 'bitch fest.'"

Perry ignored Kevin, instead reaching towards me, grabbing my ripped ear and tugging hard. "So what are your ears made of? Cardboard and dyed dryer lint?"

Burn her where she stands!

I yowled in pain and swatted her hand, rubbing my ear when she let go. With demons laughing in the background, she glared at me. After a second, I turned into a raven and flew up to perch on the porch's overhang.

That made her pause. She pointed at me. "I didn't know he had that ability."

"It's a demon ability," Mr. Davenport said. "Everything in the yard can do it."

Several long moments of silence passed while this sunk in before Douglas spoke. "We need someone who can help us eradicate the Hunters. We can't control everyone. But you can. You're forceful enough to get everyone to obey, and you're twisted enough to come up with truly devastating battle plans. Think about it. An army of demons, all at your beck and call. I can teach you to summon your own demons, too. All we ask is that you help us first."

A serpent-looking afrit snorted, baring his fangs. "This human couldn't control us if she wanted to." He snaked his head towards her, prompting me to hop back several steps. "She's too weak, too squishy, too human. She doesn't hold my will. In fact, I'll -"

A dull whacking sound cut the afrit off. I hopped forward and looked down on the porch to find that Perry had hit him on the nose with a rolled magazine. She smacked him a few more times, and he retreated back to his original place, obviously bewildered.

"Anyone else have a problem?" Perry asked, brandishing the magazine.

No one spoke up.

I suppose there are three people who can almost control a demon, my voice observed.

I ruffled my feathers a bit. Really?

Yes, it confirmed. Summoners, Charmers, and that mortal you call Perry.

So Perry's in charge now.

The Hunters are screwed.

And what was Leo up to while all this was happening?

We'll have to wait and see.

So, until then, feel free to review. Or don't. Meh.

And enjoy.

*Bows and exits*