Okay, here's to hoping I can get this chapter up quicker than the last one. If I can't, many apologies to you guys!
NOTE: In case none of you noticed - I posted a one-shot under 'The Drawer of Ideas and Impossible Things' based on the idea of, 'what if Harry hadn't died in the Accidental Vessel?'. If you're interested, check it out and leave me a review!
To the two guest reviewers - who I suspect are the same person - and 'Reality Check', please don't bother to leave a review unless your criticism is actually constructive. Also, 'tranny' is a hugely offensive word to use and I would think that you should probably take a long look at your life decisions if you're using it that casually.
In addition, I don't care what you think of Michael being gender neutral. He's gender neutral. I don't understand why people have such a problem with that.
Finally, no, I do not fantasize about Snape being better than he really is. He's an asshole. He's also an asshole who likes to feel absolved of any blame. Hence the asphodel and wormwood bit in the earliest chapters.
That's all. Please refrain from leaving nasty comments in the future.
Okay, long author's note, I know, now let's get on with the story!
Disclaimer: I do not own Supernatural or Harry Potter
St Mungo's turned out to be a relatively well-hidden wizard hospital, but it was only too easy for Gabriel to find his way past the enchanted storefront and into the lobby of the hospital. It wasn't very crowded, late at night as it was, and Gabriel was easily able to slide up to the front desk, under the guise of a brown-haired man.
A young witch was sitting there, going over a long list of parchment. "Can I help you?" She sounded vaguely irritated.
"You can." Gabriel grinned impishly. "I'm looking for a..." He pretended to check a notebook which he'd snapped up prior to entering the hospital. "Umbridge?"
The witch frowned. "Madam Umbridge was checked out weeks ago."
"Darn." Gabriel grinned at her. He hadn't really expected Umbridge to still be there. "Any chance you could tell me where she might be?"
The witch looked up at him with narrowed eyes. "Is there a reason you're looking for her?"
Gabriel held his hands up. "Professional interest," he replied easily, withdrawing a fake ID and handing it over with a flourish. "That, and I've been assigned to get an interview with her by my boss, and I like keeping my job."
"I didn't know the news had spread to America," the witch remarked, her attitude relaxing and opening as the tension bled out of her posture.
"She keeps an eye out for things like this," Gabriel 'explained'. "Runs a magical creature magazine, see, and Tricksters are pretty rare - at least, from what I've heard. Never knew about 'em before this assignment."
"Well, I'm sure Madam Umbridge will be all too willing to share," said the witch, rolling her eyes and sweeping the chair over to where a row of filing cabinets stood. "Honestly, I've never heard a patient talk so much - once she was up to it, of course, very nasty business." She glanced over her shoulder to where Gabriel was still leaning against the counter. "Sure you want to get involved?"
"I work for a magical creatures magazine," Gabriel repeated by way of answer. "Trust me, I've been up against some crazy stuff. Besides, isn't this Trickster thing supposed to be gone now?"
"Well, I haven't heard any recent news, so I assume it's been dealt with. Ah, here it is." The witch pulled out a slim file. "I think...yes, here, she was discharged back in October. Most likely by now she'll be back at the Ministry, but in case she isn't you could try and see if they'll release her address."
She swung back over to the main counter, the chair sliding smoothly despite its lack of wheels. "D'you know how to get into the Ministry?"
"Honestly? No clue," Gabriel laughed. "Never really had cause to come across the pond before - plenty to see and do in America, it being about ten times the size of this country."
The witch laughed with him. "I suppose I can't fault you for that - and the weather's not much good either." She pulled over a blank piece of parchment and plucked a quill from an inkpot which housed several, scribbling away in neat, curly handwriting. "The visitor's entrance is near here, actually, and you'll have to go that way because only employees know the Floo password."
"Thanks." Gabriel accepted the scrap she handed over. "I can't say much for the weather either - but I come from up north myself, so instead of rain we get a shitload of snow every year."
"Bad luck," the witch sympathized. "Still, at least snow you can shovel out of the way."
Gabriel shrugged, tucking the parchment into his front pocket. "Maybe. Thanks again for the directions." He turned to leave, only to be stopped by a shouted "Hey!"
The witch was holding out a blue card. "You forgot your ID," she said.
Gabriel made a show of reaching for his pocket. "Well," he said, taking it back, "Good thing you caught that!"
"You're welcome. Good luck with your interview."
"I think I'll need it, from what I've heard of the Ministry."
It wasn't that much harder to get into the Ministry.
"Not only is it ridiculous," Gabriel muttered, checking the directions again and glancing at the phone booth, "But it's not even decently protected."
No one inside the Ministry himself gave him a second glance, and in the plain robes Gabriel had disguised himself in he was practically camouflaged against the background of tired government workers. There was a large, ostentatious fountain in the center of the room the phone box deposited him into which Gabriel gave a single condescending glance because really? It was like wizards were trying to broadcast the fact that they were outrageously bigoted.
Umbridge was easy enough to find once he was in the building, however little contact he wanted with her soul, and flying into her office when she briefly stepped out was even easier.
"What - how did you get in here?"
"I'm sorry, but there wasn't anyone here and I thought I'd just wait and see if you came back."
"Oh - I see." Umbridge eyed him warily - Gabriel could sense glamour magic hiding almost everything that wasn't covered by her clothes. "Who are you, again?"
"I'm with an American journal on magical creatures," Gabriel repeated his earlier lie, standing up fluidly. "Got the news about the Trickster-" Umbridge flinched violently at the mention, but Gabriel continued on. "-And I got ordered over here to find out what happened."
"I see." Umbridge looked torn between reluctance and eagerness to tell her side of the story to someone who would actually listen. "Well, sit down, why don't you. Tea?"
"No thanks." Gabriel closed the door for her as Umbridge sat down, a broad grin spreading across his face. He'd always disliked people who managed to escape his traps.
"You had something to do with that, didn't you?"
"I have absolutely no idea what you mean." Gabriel let the newspaper fold over on itself, covering the moving picture and the blaring headline of 'Undersecretary Found Dead in Office!'.
"Okay," said Vali from his position precariously leaning backwards on one of the kitchen chairs, "First off, this is the first time I've ever seen you reading one of the wizard newspapers. Second, you were weirdly happy about something when you came back last night, and I know what Loki's the god of."
Gabriel nodded as he folded up the paper. "Sound reasoning. Absolutely no proof, though, and I wasn't reading that article anyway."
"Exactly," Vali said in a triumphant tone. "Why not read the article unless you were trying to make a point? It was pretty obvious, and usually a death catches attention."
Gabriel pointed a fork at Vali. "Better. That was good. I knew I passed down something other than my good looks."
Vali frowned. "Hang on, you did that on purpose, didn't you?"
"Why bother getting the paper if I already know what happened?" Gabriel tossed it onto the table facedown. "Just curious to see if you'd notice."
"Notice what?" Narvi strolled in, tipping his brother's chair forward so that all four legs hit the floor. Vali sent him a dirty look, but Narvi's attention had already drifted to the newspaper. He glanced at the headline, then at Gabriel. "Why'd you do something like that?"
Vali gestured at Gabriel with a sweeping hand motion. "See! Anyone could tell it was you."
"I never said it wasn't."
"What'd she do?" Narvi glanced back down at the paper. "Actually, scratch that, how did they get this picture to move?"
"No idea." Gabriel shrugged. "I think it's some sort of potion, but I couldn't say for sure. Knock yourself out with the paper, though, I don't think anyone else is going to read it."
Narvi wasted no time in flipping open to the main article and sitting down as Vali tilted back onto two chair legs and Gabriel pondered the benefits of whipping up some hot chocolate when the boys could wake up at any moment, walk in, and demand some of their own.
His thoughts were interrupted when Narvi let out a long whistle. "Wow. Pulled out all the stops, huh?"
"Hardly," Gabriel scoffed. "But the original trick was back in October and she should have died then, so I was a little frustrated."
"What did she do?" Narvi was reading the article with mild fascination. Vali was leaning over in an attempt to see what the article said.
"Her detentions crossed the line from punishment to actual torture," Gabriel replied, making the twins look at him in shock, "And she had the unfortunate problem of handing them out to someone I liked."
"Torture?" Vali repeated. "How'd that get past the other teachers?"
"She used a quill which used the user's ink as blood," Gabriel answered, "And then carved it on their hand. She was the Minister's flunky or whatever, so I guess no one ever searched her office and students didn't say anything because they knew she'd get off."
Narvi glanced back down at the article. "Actually, now this seems kind of tame."
"Well, like I said, this was only because she didn't die the first time around." Gabriel gave in and made himself some hot chocolate with a snap.
"Do I want to know what you did the first time around?"
"Probably not."
There was someone at the gate.
Which was weird, because Sigyn never showed up when Gabriel was there, everyone else was either inside or in the yard with Gabriel, and he hadn't invited anyone over.
The momentary lapse in attention gained Gabriel a snowball in the face, sending Slepnir and Jormungand [who had thrown it] into a fit of giggles.
"|Good aim,|" Gabriel called, wiping snow off his face. Fenris threw one back which missed, in part because Slepnir moved and partly because the snowball fell a couple feet short. "|Give me one second, guys, the General needs to take a strategic retreat.|"
The three boys continued to eagerly toss snowballs at each other as Gabriel walked towards the fence, seeing with surprise a swarm of redheads. How had the Weasleys ended up at his gate?
Oh, right. He'd given Dumbledore his address. Why had he thought that was a good idea again?
"Something the matter?" Gabriel asked, flicking aside the wards which kept anyone on the lawn invisible to those outside the gate and causing several of the Weasleys to jump at his sudden appearance. He noticed that Mrs. Weasley bore a large basket, which must have been magically lightened, and that Hermione and Michael had come as well.
"Oh good," she said briskly. "I wasn't sure we'd gotten the right address. No, nothing's wrong."
"So your visit is for..." Gabriel trailed off, leaning against the gate as he waited for an answer.
"We wanted to say thanks," Ginny said. "You know, for helping our dad." The twins nodded seriously, which was just weird. Gabriel hadn't ever seen them not making a joke.
"Oh." Well, that explained the basket. Mrs. Weasley had probably made about three hundred pies and stuffed them all in there. "No thanks necessary, really-"
"Nonsense!" Mrs. Weasley cut Gabriel off as she shoved the basket into his hands. "You saved his life, and we already owed you once because of Ginny-"
"Not-"
"And," Mrs. Weasley powered over Gabriel's objection, "It's because I wanted you to have something for the holidays, since I-" She abruptly stopped talking and Gabriel saw her eyes flick downwards in surprise as a hand fastened itself on his sleeve.
Shit.
"|Aren't you going to keep playing?|" Fenris demanded, not sparing a glance towards the Weasleys who were all looking at him in various states of surprise and confusion.
"|Sure I am. I told you, the General needs a break,|" Gabriel replied, setting the basket on the ground and shifting as he turned towards Fenris so that he was slightly in between him and the Weasleys. "|You can keep playing on your own, you know.|"
"|But Slepnir cheats.|"
Gabriel raised an eyebrow. "|Does he? Then cheat back.|"
"Who's that?" Fred asked, seemingly getting over his stupefication. Gabriel turned back to the Weasleys with a curious Fenris still attached to his arm.
"|Who're they?|" Fenris questioned.
"|One at a time,|" Gabriel said, putting a hand on Fenris's head. "Why do you ask?"
Mrs. Weasley seemed rather taken aback, but it was Michael who spoke. "Since when do you have kids?"
Fenris - who still looked oddly similar to Gabriel's current vessel, barring his slightly darker skin, was just as confused [if for a different reason]. He tugged sharply on Gabriel's sleeve again. "Fa-ðiiiiiiiiiiiiir," he whined.
"|Okay, you know what?|" Gabriel whirled around and picked Fenris up in one smooth move, making him shriek and finishing the turn so that he ended up looking at the Weasleys again, perfectly calm with a toddler [of sorts] in a thick winter jacket on his hip.
"You might as well come in," he said reluctantly.
Okay, originally this chapter was a lot longer, but I figure by now your guys are more eager for quality over quantity and I was having a ron of trouble finding a good ending place so I need some time to work on the last scene a bit longer. Thanks for your endless patience with my updates!
Please read and [politely] review!