Part II: In the Dark
Chapter 6: Without Words
The Tates are not pleased, but at least Eleanor says goodbye this time.
Loki wanted to depart a day after Thor returned with a laundry list of conditions, saying that Odin has agreed to take them in if Loki would return to his white cell. Loki quickly agreed but Eleanor stayed silent.
She wanted at least a month to get their affairs in order, which, of course, made Loki flip out.
In the end they settled on two weeks, giving Eleanor the opportunity to visit her family.
Mama Maureen and Laura don't really understand, but Eleanor promises to stay safe and send updates through Jane as often as possible. They want similar promises for visits, but Eleanor can't lie to them. She doubts Loki will be allowed to come and go as he pleases, and Eleanor will certainly not be leaving him alone on a hostile realm.
They return from a long weekend full of Tates to find the Avengers gathered at the compound. All of them.
It is strange to see Natasha, Clint, and Bruce. Thor is back, avoiding Jane and looking grim. Eleanor worries that Steve and Tony stuck around to talk her out of the move, but something about the way Loki talked about Eleanor convinced them just as it convinced her.
He was shockingly open and so earnest, both about his fears and feelings. He loves her, of course. She's known this for a long time, even if he's never said the words.
She's not one for words.
It becomes clear that the Avengers have assembled for the first time in years to hear Loki's account of this titan character. He fulfills his promise, despite the obvious toll it will take on his mental wellbeing.
They gather in a windowless room in the basement of the main building of the complex. Eleanor would be more comfortable in the lab. Nothing will make this more comfortable for Loki, however.
No one, save for Eleanor and Tony, seem to notice Loki's shaking hands or pale, clammy skin. Thor might as well, but he is standing directly behind Loki and Eleanor, lurking by the door, so she can't see his face without turning around constantly.
Eleanor doesn't learn much, for there isn't much to tell. The few details he does provide are not new information to her. She was able to piece together this much over the years.
Still, there is something extremely disturbing about Loki's emotionless, controlled description of the creature that unmade and remade Loki in his image.
"His mistress is Death," Loki murmurs, in a sort of daze. He doesn't even notice when she takes his hand. "And his sole ambition is to make you welcome her, beg for her in the final, painful moments of your life."
"What does he want?" asks Cap.
Loki turns, dull eyes on the man out of time. "Did I not just say? To deliver every living being to his mistress, his victims seeing it as mercy rather than an end. He corrupts life, makes every breath and heartbeat and thought unbearable. Simple pain and isolation will do for mortals, although I can only assume he uses different tactics for different beings. As a Frost Giant, fire was particularly painful for me. And he twisted around my memory in addition to the rest."
Eleanor notices her own tears.
"So," says Tony after a few beats of horrified silence. "This guy wants to kill everyone in the most torturous way possible? To please his girlfriend. Death."
"Yes," Loki says, annoyed now that they don't seem to be getting it. He glances at Eleanor as if to say "these are the fools that bested me? I am deeply shamed."
Nausea churns in Eleanor's gut.
Although Loki's phrases are facts, essentially he is detailing his time tortured, how he was remade into the worst possible version of himself. He has very little practical knowledge to offer, but that does little to stop the Avengers from asking questions.
"How can we kill him?"
"What is his plan?"
"When will he attack?"
"How will he attack?"
Loki does not know, yet they continue to ask, all yammering at him, talking over each other as they struggle to be heard.
"That's enough," Eleanor says.
No one stops. She can be louder. She will be louder. As soon as breathing gets a bit easier.
"Silence!" Thor's booms reverberated in the windowless room, making Eleanor jump in her seat.
There is silence for a moment.
"That's enough," Eleanor repeats.
"What the hell is she even doing here, Director?" demands Clint Barton.
"I go where he goes," Eleanor says with false sweetness. "And he goes where I go. Right now, I'm going home."
"Eleanor—"
She doesn't let Fury continue. "We've been at it for hours. This is exhausting and sickening. If I have to sit here and listen to this for another second, I'm going to fucking lose it. I know you're scared, but he doesn't have any answers. Yelling in our general direction isn't going to help."
The Hawk in particularly doesn't believe Loki to be sharing everything, and Eleanor forgives him because he was a brainwashed minion, but Loki's on the verge of totally falling apart.
This is not how decent people treat victims of abuse.
"Lady Eleanor is correct," Thor says. "Let them be. You have all the information there is to be had. Enough."
No one likes to argue with the God of Thunder. It must be nice to be so big and loud.
Eleanor pulls Loki out of his seat and towards the door. Eleanor shares a look with Thor as they pass. Tears silently run down his cheeks.
Eleanor wonders if Loki's noticed.
"Eleanor, Loki," says the thunder god. "I must return home to make preparations. I expect to see you in two days' time."
She nods and gets Loki the hell out of there.
By the time they get outside the sun has set and Loki's having a hard time breathing. She was hoping to get him home before the panic really seized him. Instead she pulls him into the backseat of her jeep, sitting behind him so she can get her arms around him. With one hand placed over his heart, she holds him tightly and takes deep, even breaths.
"I'm real, Loki, and so are you. We are here in the backseat of the jeep, about to go home." In the past she'd tell him that he's safe, but she can't manage the words, given how their lives have changed since his last panic attack.
Her soothing words do nothing to calm him down and Loki claws at the buttons of his shirt. Understanding his need, she pops the first few, placing her hand against his exposed skin. As she starts to sing, his breathing evens out and his heart rate slows against her palm.
"Let us depart, Eleanor," he murmurs. "Before your meddling friends accost me with their queries once more."
They drive for a few silent minutes before Eleanor finds her words.
"I can't believe you talked about it," she says. "You never talk about it."
Loki shudders. "And I never will again."
She wonders what is worse for him, talking about past traumas or the prospect of returning to Asgard.
"Thank you," she says. When she tries to take his hand he jerks away from her.
"I am ripping you away from all you know and love for the second time. Do not thank me."
"Not everything I know and love," she whispers.
They pull into the garage and Loki is out of the vehicle before it even comes to a complete stop. She watches him stalk around the house and up the bluff before slowly moving inside, wandering from room to room and trying to say goodbye.
Inside the home Loki magicked for them is a mess of half packed boxes and piles designated for Goodwill or storage. Eleanor has no idea how long they'll be gone – this very well could be permanent – but she wants all their personal belongings to be moved to the basement so Jane and Darcy can live here in their absence. Loki isn't thrilled about the girls taking up residence here, but the thought of their beautiful home sitting empty is abhorrent to Eleanor.
They are taking very little with them. Loki will bring his books and Eleanor will bring her instruments. Loki can disappear their stuff into some sort of magical storage unit to be accessed when they get to Asgard.
They leave in two days and there is so much to do.
Glancing out the window, Eleanor sees Loki perched on his rock, staring determinedly at the sky.
She packs up a few boxes of kitchen stuff, hauling them into the basement. Loki could accomplish this with ease, either by his magic or his superhuman strength, but the physical labor is necessary to keep her mind occupied after the last horrible hours.
The kitchen is finished, all packed away and stored. It's getting late but Loki is still on his rock. Sleep without him is impossible given the danger lurking in her dreams. She briefly considers the piano, but she's feeling too fragile.
Loki needs her to keep it together for the next two days and playing will make it impossible to keep her volatile emotions at bay.
Instead, she drags herself upstairs and tackles her wardrobe. She dumps out the entire contents of her closet on their bed and begins to sort.
The donation and charity piles grow much larger than those that get packed into a suitcase that will make the move.
She owns far too much stuff.
Eleanor puzzles over her shorter dresses. Asgardian ladies are all about the long, flowing gowns, beautifully draped columns of silk and ornate beading. Apparently, exposing skin above the waist is perfectly fine on Asgard but bare legs are totally scandalous. Her shorter dresses are indecent in the world of the gods, but Eleanor hesitates to put them in the storage pile.
"Eleanor." For the first time in years his silent appearance startles her. She squeaks and jumps, nearly falling off the bed where she's seated with a hunter green garment in her lap.
He stands directly behind her, gently pushing her more firmly onto the bed.
"You plan to bring all this?" he asks, gesturing to the giant suitcase.
Eleanor nods.
"Mother will surely have more appropriate attire awaiting you."
"But I like these clothes," she murmurs. "You like me in these clothes. Maybe I'll just wear them around you."
"When you visit me in the white cells, you mean?" he asks. Suddenly he sounds so damn tired. Eleanor leans back into his solid body. "I would be forced to commit a whole new round of egregious crimes if any saw you in such attire. Burning out eyes is generally frowned upon on Asgard. Shocking, I know."
Eleanor smiles despite herself and puts the dress with the piles of clothes that will make the move.
"You never know," she explains as he frowns. "Just because I bring it doesn't mean I'll wear it."
"Bring whatever you wish, my love," he says, lips moving against her ear. "Whatever pleases my songbird."
They cannot have the things that will truly please her. She wants a guarantee of Loki's safety as well as her own. She wants to stay here, living the simple life they've built together. She wants to spare Loki all pain and hurt and fear.
"Will you be able to sleep?" he asks, pushing aside her hair to give his mouth access to her neck. She closes her eyes, comforted by his touch. "With me miles beneath your feet? Languishing in my white cell?"
"I'll sleep with you," she says.
Loki sighs heavily and abandons her neck to pace around their messy room.
Sleeping without him will not be an issue, but Eleanor keeps her plans to herself. They are entering a tenuous situation on the Realm Eternal, and Eleanor is unwilling to further add to Loki's anxiety by divulging her semi reckless scheming.
Plus, he'll try to talk her out of her own little plot.
"More denial, Eleanor? Do you truly understand what our new living situation will entail? Do you understand what you are giving up?"
"Yes."
"You will be a captive animal in a gilded cell, a beautiful caged bird. You will lose your freedom," he explains for the hundredth time. "But you will be much safer than you are here."
"And I'll be with you," she says.
"Near me," he corrects. "I will not even be granted even the illusion of freedom. There will be no luxury about my cage."
Not gonna happen.
"Why do you keep trying to talk me out of this?" she asks, suddenly annoyed. This is difficult enough without him reminding her every three seconds.
"Mentally preparing you," he replies. "I detest that I am trapping you in yet another forced arrangement. If I was a good man, I'd give you choices as I know this is not what you want, but I see no other way to keep you with me. Near me at the very least."
"It's okay, sweetheart."
Sighing all the while, he moves to sit beside her on the edge of their bed.
"What do you want, Eleanor?" he whispers in her ear.
"You," she says without hesitation.
Eyes flickering closed, Loki drops his forehead to her knees as she threads her fingers through his hair.
"That you have," he whispers. The admission is difficult for him but it pleases Eleanor endlessly. "A poor prize, I'm sure. What else do you desire?"
He lifts his head to meet her gaze. Although he still looks grim, there is such affection in his expression and it melts Eleanor slightly.
"In an ideal world, what would you desire?" he asks again.
"I'd keep this life, just as it is," she admits, making him frown.
"This I cannot give you."
"I know."
"Would you choose to stay with your family? If you could?" The question seems so hard for him. "If I could keep you there, safe and with them?"
"No." This time she hesitates before answering.
"With me you will never have anything like you were trying to have here. Nothing like what the normal humans have."
"I'm not a normal human, Loki. And we'll be okay. We will. I go where you go and we'll be fine."
With a great breath of relief, Loki pulls her into his lap. He holds her close and she returns his embrace.
"The Avengers think I lie, that I am bringing you back for some nefarious purpose, yet you believed in only a matter of moments that my motives are pure. You were so quick to agree to leave this place after months of denial. Why?" he asks.
Smiling, Eleanor touches his cheek.
"Because you asked me to," she replies.
"That's— Is that… all?"
Eleanor nods.
"Eleanor…"
"Hush," she says. "If not for me you'd disappear and be fine."
Loki snorts. "Unlikely. If not for you I'd be four long years into a century of solitude."
"Still, you are forced to do all these things you hate to do. You had to beg Thor and Odin to take me in. You had to talk about the Void with people you hate. You're prepared to live in a cell for the foreseeable future. It could be years, decades, before we figure this out and you are willing to give up everything to keep me safe."
"You forget I am the reason for the peril you are in."
"Maybe. We don't know that it has anything to do with you."
"I need you safe. Would you expect any less?"
She smiles. "No. Not at all."
Loki sighs and pushes Eleanor back until she is lying on a pile of dresses. He wraps himself around her, pushing his face into her neck.
"Are you okay? This afternoon was excruciating to listen too. I can't even imagine talking about it," she murmurs. A hanger digs into her back but Loki is calm so she doesn't move.
"It is over now, Eleanor. I endured that, as I will endure my return to the white cells."
He isn't going back to the white cells but Eleanor simply kisses his forehead and lets him rest.
She wakes up when her head hits the water.
No matter how many times she gets yanked out of what feels like sleep in the pool, she will never get used to it. This time is no less jarring then the first.
Gasping for breath, she wipes water from her eyes and stares up at Loki, glowering on the deck.
"It is nearly dawn," he says, turning to go back inside. "I shall finish packing your instruments. It is our last day on Midgard. I suppose it is time we start it."
Eleanor nods and swims for the steps. He's left her a folded towel on a deck chair and she pulls it around her shaking shoulders, hoping with everything she has that Loki is right about Asgard.
"How long will you be gone?" Darcy asks, voice low and unnaturally quiet. Maybe she doesn't want to wake the doctor who sleeps with her head in Eleanor's lap.
Wine and girl talk have done in Jane, it seems.
"Maybe years," Eleanor replies, sobered by Darcy's question. Tomorrow they leave their simple life for one of persecution on the Realm Eternal. It strikes Eleanor in this innocuous moment, making her limbs feel heavy. "Maybe forever."
"You won't visit? Not even for the big stuff? What if I finally make an honest man out of Cap?"
Eleanor giggles. "I'll try to convince the old ball and chain that it's worth the risk to see Cap in a dress."
"My superhero would look hot in anything," Darcy says. "Tulle and all."
They both laugh again at the visual, and Darcy pours the rest of the bottle into their glasses.
"Once things settle down you'll have to come visit," Eleanor says. "Bring your superhero."
If that sort of thing will even be allowed.
"Fuck yes," replies Darcy.
Eleanor cries a little because these are the women that taught her friendship. She isn't leaving them happily.
"I'm sorry," she says, drying her cheeks. "I haven't let myself freak out yet."
"Why the hell not? Freak outs are healthy," says Darcy, sipping her wine.
"Loki is freaking out enough for the both of us. Someone had to suck it up and make inconsequential decisions. Like what to pack," Eleanor says, calming. "I'll freak out when we get there."
"The one good thing here is the house. I am so stoked to move into your house. Loki would be a BAMF architect if, you know, he wasn't a reforming alien warlord hunted by the guy banging Death," Darcy muses.
Eleanor chokes on her wine. "Banging Death? Who told you that?"
"Cap."
"Steve said that Thanos is banging Death?"
"Well, he didn't put it quite so eloquently."
"Fuck, Darcy," Eleanor says. "I'm going to miss you."
When the glass doors to the lab slide open, Eleanor and Darcy are awkwardly hugging with a still asleep Jane between them. Loki makes a little sound of disgust and Eleanor turns to give him a rueful smile.
"Hot," says Tony Stark.
Loki punches him in the shoulder, sending the world's shortest superhero stumbling into the world's first.
"Know your strength," Tony mutters. "Know your fucking strength."
"Oh, I know it," Loki replies, coming close to frowning down at Eleanor.
"I'm okay," she says, reaching up to pat his stomach.
"You are crying and inebriated and hanging all over someone who is decidedly not me."
"Thank God," says Steve.
"No need to thank me," says Loki, more out of habit than anything else.
Eleanor tugs on Loki's sleeve before a catfight can break out. "Did you win buckets of money?" she asks.
"Hardly," Loki drawls. "Although I won with ease, we played poker for, ah," he clears his throat, "street cred."
Eleanor giggles. The sound reminds her of her own intoxication as Darcy hums an off key version of Gaga's Poker Face. Loki frowns down at Jane, sprawled out on the couch, her head still in Eleanor's lap.
"Lightweight," she says.
Loki raises a questioning eyebrow and Eleanor nods. He lifts the good doctor with less care than Eleanor would like. Still, he is remarkably gentle enough to keep her from waking, and then he's gone, poofing away.
"Fuck," says Tony, clutching his chest. "I hate it when he does that."
He is back a moment later without Jane and Iron Man screams a little.
"Did you tuck her in?" Eleanor asks. "Cover her with a blanket at least?"
"Of course not!" He is horrified.
She gives him a look and he sighs heavily before popping off again.
Tony makes a sound imitating a cracking whip.
"Dude," says Darcy, getting up and stretching. "You're one to talk. Have you met your girlfriend?" She moves to kiss Steve in a way that makes the poor man turn bright red and then Loki is back, pulling Eleanor to her feet.
"Shall we go home?" he murmurs, pulling her hair out of the ponytail and tucking it behind her ears. The word home has her tear up again because tomorrow they'll leave it for a different and hostile realm.
Worst of all, she is half a freaky alien from said different and hostile realm. She's probably going to have to deal with that at some point.
Eleanor manages a nod and Loki bends to collect her purse, rummaging for a moment to find her keys.
They bid their friends goodnight.
"Did our separation for the evening please you?" Loki asks as they drive.
"Yes. It was my last night with Jane and Darcy."
"It is also your last night with me," he mutters.
Letting her head loll back against the headrest, she studies him. His distress is palpable and Eleanor considers filling him in on her plan, but decides against it.
Instead, she palms him, lips moving against his neck. He swerves slightly on the dirt road that leads home, and Eleanor feels him shiver.
"Night's not over, sweetheart," she says in his ear.
Loki pulls over abruptly, throwing the jeep into park and pulling her onto his lap with such speed Eleanor's drunk brain has a very difficult time understanding the new position. When he kisses her, hips coming off the seat to grind into her, she finally gets it.
The way he clings to her now, the way he kisses her as if he'll never get to do it again, reminds her of their time in the bunker all those years ago when he hated the way he needed something from her and she hated herself wanting anything from him.
She wants to tell him that everything will be okay, that they will be all right, but instead she tugs on his hair and kisses him back.
Loki magicks off her dress and doesn't let her catch a breath. Eleanor is somewhat shocked to realize her god is as scared as he is desperate. Again, she thinks about filling him in on her scheming.
"Loki." She breaks away, trying to calm him but then he is kissing her again, his hands everywhere, and she gives up on talking, yielding to his groping with equally needy touches of her own.
And it's so good, but at the same time it isn't because Loki is shaking and terrified. She lets his desperation control the encounter, all frantic touches and scraping teeth, until he's free from his pants and Eleanor is sinking down onto him, watching as his eyes roll back in his head.
"Stop," she whispers.
He whimpers, but stills his frenzied movements anyway, even as he glares up at her. His eyes are not open, but somehow he manages to glare up at her.
The temptation to roll her hips is fucking strong, filled up the way she is, but she waits until he's looking at her.
"Eleanor." He is begging, pleading, and Eleanor kisses the corner of his mouth. Finally his eyes are open.
"It's you and me," she says, tracing his cheekbones with her thumbs. "I promise. Always, Loki. It's you and me."
Wide-eyed and still so frightened, Loki nods.
"Believe it," she says, tilting her hips and moving up in his lap. Loki groans when she sinks back down. She does it again. And again. "Always. Always," she chants until she can't form words anymore.
His hands find her hips, fingers digging into her skin, but not demanding anything. He holds her gaze, even when he kisses her, even when he is panting and writhing beneath her.
She finds her words again because it feels important and even if she's not fully aware of what she's saying as she rides him in the front seat of the jeep, she makes him promises, praises him, begs him to believe her.
When it's over, she wraps her arms around his neck, hugging him tightly as they once more catch their breath.
"This isn't the end, Loki," she murmurs into his hair. "I promise."
The position is horribly uncomfortable, with her legs bent on either side of his thighs, jammed into the driver's seat, but Eleanor isn't willing to move yet, not with Loki still so shaken.
This was more the reaction she expected yesterday after his painful confession.
She pulls back, needing to see him. His eyes are closed, but she can tell by the way he clenches his jaw that he is far from all right.
"I'm with you," she says. "We're together here and we'll be together on Asgard."
Loki scoffs. "Asgard will change you, Eleanor. They will change what you feel for me."
"Things will definitely change," she agrees. "But not this. I'm yours, Loki, like you're mine, and that isn't going to change. You can't get rid of me that easy."
As if physically reacting to her words, he holds her a little tighter.
"And I won't give you up either," she says, shifting in his lap. The wetness between her legs leaves her uncomfortably cold and the steering wheel is digging into her ass. "Some snarky assholes and their opinions aren't gonna change that. They don't know you. I do."
He smiles at her as if she is a silly, naïve child, but then she is magically cleaned up and Loki ends the moment. She shivers as he helps her back into her own seat, silently handing her his discarded suit jacket. She drowns in it, but Loki's smell is all around her and she is content.
They go home for the last time for a long time.
"Hey," she says, taking his hand as they reach the front porch. "The night's not over. Let's give our house a proper goodbye."
This smile is genuine and Eleanor will let herself freak out when they get there.
The night before their departure Loki is once more forced to toss his beloved into the water to get her back.
It will be the last time this is necessary. He is sure of it.
Loki says nothing as Eleanor exchanges a tearful farewell with Jane and Darcy, but her obvious anguish grates on his already frayed nerves. Her distress begets his distress, and he clenches his jaw, resisting the urge to shake his songbird until her tears dry and she once more gives him her smile.
The women release one another, and Thor's ex-whore wraps her arms around Loki. In his shock, he stays stiff and unresponsive.
"Thank you," she says through her tears. "I couldn't have completed this project without you. I learned so much."
Loki manages a nod and gives her back a quick pat.
"You take care of her, Loki. She's not nearly as brave as she is pretending to be," murmurs Jane Foster as she finally releases him.
Eleanor receives more embraces while Loki shakes the Man of Iron's hand.
"You keep us posted," he says. "Maybe we can help each other out, yeah?"
Once more, Loki nods.
It seems that in this moment his silver tongue truly has turned to lead. Like Eleanor, in his fear and discomfort he seems to have lost the ability to speak.
In a few short moments he will return to the realm that once served as his home for what feels like the first time since his fall into nothingness. His last brief stay in the dungeons beneath the golden palace hardly counts, as the memory of it now is nothing but an unpleasant haze.
Only Eleanor's voice kept him living then, and he worries now that he'll once more descend into insanity when he is returned to the white cell, but Eleanor will fight to visit daily and he will endure.
He hopes.
In the four years since he last set foot on Asgard, Loki has changed profoundly. The sting of betrayal is no longer such a sharp, slicing pain. Instead of burning him towards vengeance, thinking of his false family causes him a dull throbbing ache, a bitterness he can clearly taste on his tongue. He no longer seeks to punish those who wronged and lied to him for millennia, but rather he'd prefer never to interact with them again.
Save his mother. He is always quite pleased to see Mother.
It feels as though he's aged ten thousand years since he let go of Thor on that bridge.
It is Eleanor's doing, although he'd never give her the satisfaction of declaring what she already knows. Even if her devotion to him is a product of his own manipulation, his need for her is genuine.
Still, he was shocked by her ready, easy agreement to leave Midgard.
Now she reaches for him, lacing her fingers through his and giving him a shy smile. He cannot help but return her look of affection. He steals the tie from her wild blond locks before pulling the hood of her cloak up to hide those curls.
Thor means to smuggle them into the palace without news of their arrival reaching the public until Loki is tucked safely away in his white cell, and they wear dark cloaks at the request of the crown prince. Although it is morning on Midgard, it will be the dead of night on Asgard and the darkness will serve them well.
Eleanor nods, indicating her readiness to depart, and with a final chorus of farewells they set out of the lab into the wide circle that serves as a bridge between worlds.
Continuing to squeeze Eleanor's tiny hand, Loki waves his fingers around his head to remove his concealment charms and looks at the sky.
"Heimdall. At your leisure."
A moment later they are consumed by a vortex of swirling light, forced upwards and away from the place that very nearly became home to Loki. Now it is Eleanor that squeezes his hand in a manner that would be reassuring if the current situation were not so horrible. Her terror is apparent, but Loki revels in the energy that surrounds them. He feels it, pulsing in his veins.
As they hurl towards Asgard, Loki lets himself smile for true. It may be his last genuine smile for quite some time.
The journey is far too short for Loki, but when their feet solidify on the rainbow bridge, Eleanor staggers. His arm around her waist is the only thing that prevents her from falling to her knees.
"Fuck," she mutters, turning to hide her face in his chest.
"I am rather fond of the rush," he replies. With hands on either side of her face, he studies her features. "Are you quite all right, my dear?"
"I'll live."
"That is indeed the goal of all this."
Although he'd rather continue to stare at his songbird, Loki forces himself to look up.
The rebuilt Bifrost pavilion appears nearly identical to the one Thor destroyed to prevent Loki from committing genocide. It would disturb Eleanor greatly if Loki had indeed slaughtered an entire race and in this moment he is grateful for the interference of his false big brother.
Very little about the raging god that sought to win the approval of a decaying monarch by such violent and destructive and irrational means is familiar to Loki.
After taking in the familiar domed room, Loki stares at the group standing in the entryway. It is somewhat surreal to be before them once more. By looking at them only, nothing appears to have altered over the last few years. Thor is with his warriors while Heimdall is at his post.
Loki fanaticizes about fleeing back to the comfort of Earth.
With a final sigh Loki takes Eleanor's hand once more, feeling as though he is walking towards his own doom, but he goes with a smirk on his face.
Thor's expression is wary and resigned, but the warriors look at him with varying levels of contempt. Heimdall's hatred is so apparent even his songbird takes note.
"If you're not careful your face will get stuck that way," she informs the gatekeeper.
Loki snorts, pleasantly surprised by Eleanor's ability to make him laugh even during such a tense moment. That is his songbird, quiet but far from shy.
Thor and the rest blink like confused, brainless owls. Heimdall twitches, transferring his glare to Eleanor. Although logically Loki knows that the loyal servant of Odin would not attack such a small, unarmed woman, he tenses, ready to defend Eleanor if need be.
"This dude really needs to chill out," Eleanor says to Loki, gesturing to the gatekeeper.
"Excellent word choice, my love," Loki replies with a chuckle. "Heimdall is not fond of me."
"I'm just going to assume that everyone here is not fond you until proven otherwise."
"A wise course of action."
"Why doesn't he like you?"
"I froze him."
"Like you tried to freeze Laura?"
"Yes, except… more."
'That's rude, Loki."
"If you say so, my dear."
"Oh!" Eleanor says. "Chill out. I get why that's funny now. Because you froze him."
"Stop!" yells Sif. "What is this?"
For a glorious – albeit brief – moment Loki forgot their hostile company, but the shrill demand of Sif reminds him of their plight once more. He doesn't understand her question and her wide-eyed expression does nothing to clarify. Eleanor appears equally confused but Thor chuckles.
"I told you of their incomprehensible banter," he says. "Is this proof enough that she is here with him willingly, Sif?"
Loki gives Sif his most sinister smirk as she continues to gape.
"Hey, guys," Eleanor greets with a silly little wave. "What's up?"
All four warriors look up. Loki grins, Eleanor giggles, and Thor sighs.
"There appears to be nothing up," says Fandral. "Nothing out of the expected, anyway. I do not understand."
"Well, there's a surprise," says Loki.
"Wait," says Sif. "I recall this phrase. She said it last time she came here. As a greeting."
"Come," Thor says without explaining to his clueless companions. "We must make use of this darkness."
Just outside the Bifrost pavilion six horses stand, waiting to bring them quickly to the palace. There, flicking his tail and baring his teeth at Thor's white is Lumar, Loki's prized horse. Raised by Loki from birth, he is not overly fond of any others and suddenly Loki feels so guilty for abandoning him here in such unfriendly company.
He is a stark reminder of a life long forgotten. The memories make Loki ache.
It is entirely possible that Lumar despises his former master, just like all others here in the Realm Eternal.
Eleanor squeezes his hand, raising a questioning eyebrow. There is no hiding from her and he tries to give her a smile. It comes out more grimace than anything.
"Why are there only six horses?" Eleanor demands, turning on the crowned prince. "We need another horse. There are seven of us."
"You will ride with Loki, Eleanor," Thor explains.
The glare on Eleanor's face is baffling to Thor. Loki takes the moment to reacquaint himself with Lumar.
"Hello, old friend," Loki murmur, extending a hand. He sighs with relief when the animal nuzzles his palm as if nothing changed.
"Why don't I get my own horse?" Eleanor continues. She is angry with Thor and Loki finds himself enjoying it immensely.
"I know this is an uncommon form of transportation on Midgard," Thor says. The fool's discomfort makes him smile as Lumar nips affectionately at his ear.
"I can ride," Eleanor says. "I'm a country girl, Thor. I can ride a damn horse."
Thor chuckles. "Very good, Eleanor. You will see your home realm from the back of your own steed, but for now you must share with my brother."
All peace he felt from his reunion with Lumar is once more replaced with despair and sickening dread. Thor will show Eleanor Asgard and Loki will be locked in a white cell. For the first time in years, Eleanor will be beyond his reach. She will be left to the mercies of people who spent centuries tricking Loki into believing in the myth of family – his mother being the one exception – and he would never have brought her here, but they are cursed with an overabundance of honor.
Eleanor is an innocent, her only crime being her affection for the God of Lies. Thor will keep her safe. He will show her the home of her ancestors, as Loki should, all the while poisoning her mind, undoing all Loki's work to make her love him. He's known from the moment he decided this was their best option that he would eventually lose Eleanor, letting her go to keep her safe. Her visits to his cell will diminish before she stops coming to see him altogether. The assurance that she is protected will be enough to sustain him.
"Loki," she says.
Eleanor is on Lumar and all stare at him. Thor and the warriors Loki once called friends palm their weaponry as if Loki is planning some violence while Eleanor just appears concerned.
She is braiding her hair.
Loki shakes his head, wondering what he missed during his brooding, and swings onto his horse behind Eleanor. He wraps his arms around her waist, holding her a degree too tightly. She rests her hand over his, once more touching him in a way that is meant to be reassuring.
As they depart, Eleanor continues to lean back into his chest and Loki is keenly aware that these touches will most likely be their last. Thor attempts to engage Eleanor in conversation as they ride, but the songbird stays quiet. Perhaps she finally is saddened by their inevitable separation. In the last two Midgardian weeks, Eleanor has seemed wholly and annoyingly undisturbed by his looming imprisonment.
Several times Loki slows Lumar's pace to a leisurely walk, only to be scolded by Thor. Eleanor glances over her shoulder, knowing full well that he is prolonging this trip, but the smile she gives him is far too cheerful and far too devious. He scowls at her in return, attempting to decode her expression, but Eleanor turns around before he can concoct any theories.
Far sooner than he'd like, they are dismounting near the stables. He bids Lumar a reluctant farewell, dragging his feet as they move inside. Twenty of Odin's guard await, prepared to escort him the white cells. Loki wonders if he'll be given his old cell back.
Eleanor huffs and glares at the small battalion here to remove him from her side. "Really?" her glare seems to say. "Is this really necessary?"
The guard in front holds heavy chains and Loki is surprised that Thor did not shackle him the moment they arrived on the bridge.
Much to Loki's amusement, Eleanor actually steps in front of him as if she means to protect him. She looks so small here, surrounded by the much taller Aesir, but this does not deter her from lifting that stubbornly defiant chin of hers.
"Lady Eleanor," Thor says, sensing that she is on the verge of being difficult. "It is time to take your leave. I will personally escort you to visit Loki on the morrow, after you both have had the time to settle in your new accommodations."
At least Eleanor will be dwelling in his rooms. It is a small comfort.
"No," she says simply.
"No?" repeats the crowned oaf.
Loki crosses his arms over his chest to study Eleanor. As is the norm, he has not a clue as to what is going on in that head of hers.
"Loki is not going to the white cells, Thor," she says. Her speech is slow, as if she is addressing someone with the mental capacity of a cricket. Which, come to think of it, she is.
Eleanor's announcement is met with humor. If Odin's guards were not so well trained they would be chuckling like the warriors three. Only Thor and Sif seem to understand that the songbird is a formidable force.
"This arrangement is conditional on Loki's return to his cell," Thor says through a clenched jaw. The crowned oaf's irritation delights Loki and he appreciates Eleanor's futile show of solidarity, even if he will doubtless see the inside of his prison sooner rather than later.
"I did not agree to this condition," Eleanor says, continuing to stand between Loki and his Asgardian adversaries. "No one asked me if I was okay with him being locked up. I would never agree to this."
"Your husband did," Thor replies. "He agreed."
Loki winces. He failed to inform Eleanor of that particular lie, but she does not seem outwardly surprised although she must find the phrase shocking.
"My husband," Eleanor says, sending a little thrill up Loki's spine, "has no power to make any such agreements. You didn't ask me, Thor, and Loki is my responsibility now. The Allfather himself said so. I'm his bot man whatever thing."
Now Loki is the one who is surprised. Eleanor, devious creature that she is, kept something from him, kept a plan from him.
And after all these years her Old Norse is laughable.
"Explain this, Lady Eleanor," Thor insists.
"I'm in charge of his rehabilitation and punishment. That's the whole point of this wacked bond between us and I say locking him away will undo all the progress he made on Midgard," she says.
"Odin's decree trumps your duties as bót mannaforráð," Thor replies.
"Oh, does it?" Eleanor is smirking as she turns to Loki. "Sweetheart, I forbid you from going to the white cells."
Eleanor's words seem to infuse themselves into his very veins. It has been years since he felt the power of Eleanor's command reverberate in his body, binding him to her will. With the exception of a rather humorous incident when, in the throes of passion, his songbird accidentally issued the command "don't stop," she's held to the promise she made last time they were here to assert her power only once.
He is shocked by her actions now, a feeling obviously shared by Thor and company. Eleanor continues to smirk, as the rest are struck dumb.
An over enthusiastic guard pushes at Loki, attempting to force him to descend the steps that lead to the white cells but Eleanor's command holds and Loki is immobile.
"He can't move, you fucking moron!" she yells. Her language scandalizes the Asgardians and snaps Loki from his stupor. He attempts to step towards her, but the guard blocks the way.
"Move, Frost Giant!" booms the guard.
"Touch me again and you will find yourself short an arm," Loki says. It is obviously a bluff as he cannot harm anyone, but this foolhardy guard knows not of Eleanor's command that prevents Loki from lashing out. "Touch her, you will be short a head."
"Enough!" Thor roars, yanking the heavily armored guard away from Loki and Eleanor. "You forget yourself. This is a prince of Asgard, a son of Odin, and he will be treated with respect and dignity. The next occurrence of such language will land you in Prince Loki's cell."
And the surprises continue to mount.
Eleanor puts an arm around Loki's waist as he stares at his false brother.
"Thor, I'll command him to stay in his rooms," Eleanor murmurs. "Just take us up there for now. We can talk about my reasoning. Please?"
Loki looks down at the woman at his side. She is so very tiny, physically fragile, but her strength amazes him. She is steadfast and she wants him near.
That much is now apparent. That much became apparent long ago, truth be told.
He was a fool to doubt her affections.
Now if only they were genuine.
In the end they are led to Loki's old rooms in time to see daybreak over the city. Loki is too stunned to speak.
1st beta: Heather
Final beta: Erica