Chapter 11: Daria Digs
"That's fucking instant death or dismemberment," Mai said earnestly. "Stay away from the damn PTO."
Daria and Jane did not have to be warned twice. Almost everything on the Ling's farm was unfamiliar to them and the power take-off or 'PTO' as Mai called it was innocently dangerous in appearance. A grooved shaft stuck out the back of the Ling's tractor and slipped onto it was a square shaft with a swivel-end near the tractor. This shaft powered a long chute on a wheeled triangular base, something Mai called the elevator. Even to Daria the square shaft looked inadequately protected by a loose round steel sleeve.
Daria looked around herself not for the first time, hardly believing that she and Jane were on a farm only a few miles outside Lawndale.
Mai had driven them over gently rolling hills and into a whole new world for Daria. The breeze brought her sweet smells off rolling fields of grasses and some plant which Mai called alfalfa.
Mai had rolled her eyes when Daria joked that she expected barnyard smells and pigs rooting about freely. Except for a friendly farm dog and cats sleeping in the sun no animals were to be seen or smelled.
The long gravel driveway up to a well-maintained stone house boasted a banner reading "Ling's Certified Organic Acres." Jane had run by the Ling's farm many times but she too was looking around with interest.
"Nǐmen zhǔnbèi hǎole ma?" Mai's father called out the wide door of the haymow. He was standing by the other end of the elevator. Mr. Ling translated for Jane and Daria's benefit, "Are you all ready then?"
Mai gave a couple more pumps of her grease gun into a nozzle on the elevator and waved at him, "Yep, Ba. That's the last zerk. And I've scared them enough about the PTO. They'll just stay and on the hay rack and stack bales."
Mr. Ling retreated inside the haymow as Mai clambered into the seat of the high red Farmall tractor. She brought it to a loud throaty life and shifted a couple levers. With a well-oiled clatter the metal bars inside the elevator began moving up towards the hay mow. Daria and Jane kept their eyes on the rapidly spinning PTO and connected shaft.
"Shit!" Mai called loud enough to be heard over the tractor. She looked embarrassed as she shifted a level or two and brought the elevator to a halt. Her father came to the door and wagged a finger at her while half-smiling.
"I do that about every third time," Mai yelled. A moment later the elevator started in the other direction and moments after that rectangular bales of hay started coming down the chute. Daria and Jane were fascinated by the spinning PTO and shaft until it came time for them to actually do some work.
Mai effortlessly grabbed bale after bale and threw them on the rack. With a bit more effort Daria and Jane wrapped their gloved fingers under twine on a bale and together carried it to the end of the rack. They started building a stack following Mai's instructions. They quickly marveled that one man in the haymow and one classmate on the ground could easily keep the two of them busy stacking bales.
Soon enough the trio had built a solid stack of bales on the rack. Jane and Daria caught their breaths as Mai moved the rack out of the way and brought up another rack to fill. Mrs. Ling came out just as Daria tucked the final bale into place and Mai killed the tractor.
"Great work, girls," she told panting Jane and Daria. "That's a big help. Now you come in and clean up while Mai and Leonard finish up. By the time they're done I'll have supper almost ready."
Daria smiled at Mrs. Ling's soft, honeyed Southern tones, such a contrast to Mr. Ling's flat Midwestern speech. She recognized both influences in Mai's inflections. She and Jane walked to the stone farmhouse with Mrs. Ling. She showed them to Mai's small second story room which impressed Daria with its attached bathroom.
"Not having to share with Quinn and her acres of organic makeup. Ahh, farm living is the life for me."
"Towels are in the cabinets, girls. Take what you need and put them in the hamper when you're done. Come down for supper then."
"See something you like?" Jane asked Daria who was staring at a poster on Mai's wall. Daria drudged up the name 'Farrah Fawcett' as she took in the blonde woman in the pink one-piece. Almost unconsciously Daria looked down at her tee-shirt and compared it to the erect nipples on the poster.
"No, no," Daria assured Jane. "I just know that's an old poster. I'm surprised it's not more faded and worn out. And I'm admiring her wide-ranging musical tastes."
"Sure you are," Jane smirked. Posters of Suzi Quatro, Pat Benatar, Janis Joplin, Patti Smith and pretty girls which Daria took to be Chinese popstars adorned other walls. Farrah Fawcett had pride of place; Daria realized. It would be the first thing Mai saw when sitting up in bed in the morning. Close to Farrah was a poster with Johnny Cash's rugged visage. Daria wondered what Mr. and Mrs. Ling made of their daughter's bedroom wall adornment. It was definitely different from Quinn's boy band posters.
"Jane," Daria began slowly. "Thanks for not being weirded out by, uhm, you know."
"Uhm, I know what?" Jane asked happy to make Daria squirm a bit. "Daria, this is new to both of us and I suspect Mai too, really. I don't think she's ever had a girlfriend and I'm a bit dubious about her taste in wenches, but if it makes you both happy, I say great. I'm straight as Country 55 out there. So are Pris and Siobhan, I think, but we're happy to support our best little gay buddies. Just don't expect me to shower with you."
Jane smirked as she met Daria's glare. Jane had to add to the fire.
"But there is one thing I just can't get over, Morgendorffer."
To Daria's arched eyebrow of curiosity and warning Jane took a step back before she chanted. "You're dating a jock. You're dating a jock."
Mai's bedroom was small but even so Jane managed to mostly avoid an incensed Daria. Daria had trapped her in a corner and was warily moving in just as a freshly showered Mai arrived. Quickly assessing the situation Mai threw a pillow to Daria and squealed, "Get her!"
"No fair, no fair," Jane protested as the two girls began to pummel her with pillows. "Two against one."
Jane managed to wrest a pillow from Mai and counter-attack. All three were happily shrieking and whirling about Mai's room until it seemed a cessation of hostilities was in order. They stopped and stood looking at each other, Mai and Jane grinning like loons and Daria sharing a small, sincere smile.
Mai was a veteran of pillow fights from sleep-overs with Pris and Siobhan. For Jane it was her first, her sisters having been too old to scrap with their kid sister. For Daria it was the first innocent pillow fight of her life. She still kept a shredded pillow from the last battle two years previous; it served to remind herself that Quinn was stronger than she looked and Quinn instinctively fought dirty. The situation had brought about The Great Living Room Seating Arrangement Truce which both sisters honored scrupulously. Mrs. Ling called them down to supper as Mai was rearranging her room.
They found Mrs. Ling in the kitchen stirring a wide bowl with a pair of long, thick chopsticks. The mixture looked like chopped meat with some minced green vegetables added. Round discs of dough were spread on a floured cutting board.
"Hi girls," Mrs. Ling greeted Daria and Jane's curious looks. "I know you just finished working but we're going to put you to work on the jiaozi too."
Before she could explain, Mr. Ling came in looking clean and in fresh clothes.
"Leonard," she scolded. "You let your daughter clean up in the barn again?"
"Mavis," he took off his Case iH cap and ran his fingers through his thick salt-and-pepper hair. "You know the German pig farmer we brought the place from basically set up a whole apartment out there for when he had to stay up farrowing. And your daughter's a neat freak. She keeps it clean."
Mai moved to the table next to Daria. They glanced at each other and micro-smiled. Jane returned to pragmatic matters.
"So, Mrs. Ling. I'm hungry. Show us what to do and let's get to work so I can eat."
Mr. Ling looked at the supplies and shook his head. "You'll have to excuse me girls. Men aren't any good making jiaozi and I've got paperwork to take care of and I need to call old Jim Schwabach to come get his hay. Call me when it's time to eat."
Mai laughed, "Ba, you always say that. It's just you who can't make pretty jiaozi. But go make money for me to spend. I'll be sure we save some for you."
Mr. Ling moved off down the hall. Mai plopped a dollop of meat filling in the center of a round of dough. Too quick for Daria to follow, Mai's fingers crimped the dough wrapper together and then she held a little thing in her hand which looked like a mouse with stitches on its back.
"Cool!" Jane exclaimed.
Mai did it again slowly and Jane picked up a round herself. A few fumbling seconds later Jane's little mousey joined those of Mai and Mrs. Ling. Daria tried but her jiaozi ended up looking like exploded mice.
"Hrm, maybe I'm talented at something else in the process," she ventured. "Like eating."
"Here dear," Mrs. Ling said. "Just fold it over and pinch together tightly. You don't have to make a fancy design. We'll eat them all."
Daria's adequate jiaozi soon joined the rows. Mai and Jane were competing on intricate designs until Mrs. Ling warned them that their jiaozi might burst in the cooking. At last Mrs. Ling deemed they had enough for three hungry teens and two adults. She pulled some different looking dumplings from the refrigerator.
"My friends in Kansas taught me how to make vereniki," she said. "Or as we call it 'Mennonite jiaozi', cheese dumplings. Eating the two together can be a recipe for sorry tummies as Mai and her brother found out once. But we can have a few this time."
Mai's head jerked up and she ran to the window as they heard a car coming up the driveway.
"Tom's back!" She said excitedly and ran out the door.
"See something you like?" Daria asked a slightly blushing Jane a few moments later as they watched a tall, muscular Chinese man in his mid-twenties effortlessly pick up Mai and swing her in a hug. They were standing next to a cherry red Corvette.
"No, no just admiring the paint job." Jane asserted as she took in the slightly-jelled, short hair which Asian guys seemed to pull off so well.
Mai grinned as she broke the hug.
"Jane, Daria, this big ox is my brother, Tom Ling."
Tom gave Jane an easy smile and shook her proffered hand. He regarded Daria with a scrutiny which was beginning to make her uncomfortable until he turned back to Mai.
"Take care of her." He commanded his baby sister even as she punched him on the arm.
The four of them moved to the house as Tom asked, "Ma and Ba inside? Is supper ready? I'm starved."
"Do you even deserve to eat?" Mai teased. "The three of us just filled a couple hayracks. What did you do besides sit on your butt from Washington home?"
"Hey, sis, studying law and driving take a lot out of a guy. You mean you forced these two to work for their supper? That's cruel slavery!"
"It was our pleasure." Jane assured him. "Beats sitting at home doing nothing."
Tom bent down as the old farm dog ambled slowly up to him. He sent some time giving her a thorough petting and ear-scratching and praise.
"Wow, Hao Gou is getting slow. I guess she's really old. We got her even before you were born."
Mai got somber. "Yeah, Ba says she's not getting much out of life any more. He hinted we may have to soon…you know."
Tom stood straight and let out a slow sigh. "Yeah."
In the house Tom gave Mrs. Ling a hug and smooch on the cheek. Mr. Ling looked up into his son's eyes as they shook hands. Daria and Jane could see the affection in that formal gesture.
Mrs. Ling shepherded Daria, Jane and Tom into the dining room, despite the girls' insistence that they not cause inconvenience and just eat in the kitchen. Mai and her mother brought in steaming plates of Chinese dumplings and "Mennonite jiaozi." Daria and Jane competed on learning chopstick use.
Six people sat cozily around the Ling's dining room table. The Lings prepared bowls of spice and sauce for their guests. Tom prevented Mai from spiking Jane's bowl with a heavy infusion of hot sauce. Jane spooned a generous portion in her bowl anyway and smiled happily as she dipped jiaozi into the sauce and munched away. Daria liked the savory Chinese jiaozi but found herself more drawn to the vereniki with its heavy creamy sauce. Mai attentively spooned up servings for her.
The Lings were careful to avoid speaking in Chinese as Tom told about his third year of law school.
"The first year they scare you to death," he told Daria and Jane, his family having evidently heard this before. "The second year they work you to death, by the third year they bore you to death."
Daria sighed when she heard a car crunching the Ling's gravel driveway. "That's probably Dad come to pick up Jane and me."
Mr. Ling moved to their rarely used front door and threw it open on an about to knock Jake Morgendorffer. Jake almost dropped the bottle he was carrying but recovered quickly and gave Mr. Ling a huge smile. He pushed the bottle of red fluid into Mr. Ling's hands.
"Mr. Ling," Jake enthused as Daria was trying to decide if she should blush in embarrassment. "You probably don't remember but my wife and I were out a year ago on a date night picking your strawberries. Well, I made a couple gallons of wine out of our pickings. Here's a bottle of organic strawberry wine, homemade no sulfites."
Mr. Ling regarded the bottle with more appreciation. "Well, anyone who brings me good alcohol can call me Leo. Come in, Mr. Morgendorffer. Let's open this now and have a toast. The girls are just finishing up supper."
"Call me Jake, please, Leo. Oh hi Daria, hi Jane, hi Mai Ling."
"Dad, you can just call her, Mai." Daria told him.
"And that would explain the fruit fly infestation that Sick, Sad World was thinking of investigating." She added.
Daria, Mai and Jane went up to Mai's room to gather their book bags and work clothes. Jane was suddenly conscious of her third-wheel status as Daria and Mai prepared to say goodbye. Oh, maybe even without her there, Jane thought, they would still be shyly eyeing each other.
Jane turned away discreetly as Mai hugged Daria and mumbled, "I'll see you in school."
"If my sore muscles let me get out of bed tomorrow." Daria said. "Just kidding, that was actually fun." She gave Farrah Fawcett a last look and followed Jane downstairs.
The girls found the four adults with a wine glass each in front of them. Mr. and Mrs. Ling and Tom were sipping the bright red liquid appreciatively while they listened to Jake. Daria noted that Jake's glass was almost full and hoped that did not mean he had already drained a glass or two.
"I'm telling you, Leo, Mavis, if I can make stuff this tasty just in my basement with amateur equipment you should be able to make it better on a professional scale. Wine making is as easy as drinking it. Just look at my proposals. It's all there: equipment, supplies, licenses needed." Jake tapped on a thick folder in front of him and slid it across to Mr. Ling.
Mr. Ling sipped again. "We'll look everything over, Jake. This IS great tipple. You're right, it took three years to get certified organic and maybe it's time to take it to the next level. I got a whole big barn with clean concrete floors and not much else in it. I AM getting tired of baling hay."
Mr. Ling looked up at Daria. "Your daughter's a hard worker and Mai thinks the world of her. I take that as a good reflection on her folks. I bet we would make good partners."
Daria and Mai turned to each other in surprise. "Fuck," Mai whispered and then winced as her mother gave her the look.
"With my marketing and distribution contacts we have half the battle won before we start." Jake assured him.
Jake gave Leo another bottle and they all made their goodbyes. Jake was a cheerful fellow as he drove Jane and Daria down the driveway and towards Lawndale.
"Dad, you're going to become a bootlegger?" Daria opened with.
Jake chuckled. "Ha, the real money is in being legit. This organic thing's only gonna get bigger and bigger and Mr. Ling's on the cusp of it. He just needs an exciting new product. Yep, Little Jakey learned one good thing in military school: how to make booze!"
"Are you going to get your hands dirty, Dad? And here's the big one: does Mom agree to all this?"
"You bet she does, kiddo!" Jake concentrated on the road even as his eyes got a far-away look. "We made our own wine on the commune. The Lings grow high quality fruit. Ahh, just our little chance to get away from the rat race a bit and become one with the land."
"Yeah, just stay away from the demon-PTO or you'll become one with the land another way." Daria warned.
She heard soft breathing from the back seat and turned to see Jane snoozing away. Daria felt the full effects of a tummy full of two kinds of dumplings and an early evening of hard work. By the time they got to Jane's house she did not even wake up as Jake went to get Trent to help Jane into her house.