Hey guys! Sorry for being away for so long; first, I had school exams about two months ago. Then I had to motivate myself to write this. As you can tell by my absence, this was hard to do. I kept finding myself playing fun games like Xenoblade Chronicles (at least, it was fun until I realised the combat was boring as all hell) and Driver: San Francisco. In addition, I hated this chapter because it feels too much like filler and... well, it was boring.

On the plus side, thank you for the reviews, ladies and gentlemen. As I do not get 100 reviews just because I sneezed like high profile authors do, I shall respond to them:

deus-rasengan2: Hopefully, you're still looking forward to this one.

Solcarx: I'll do my best. Thanks.

Holy Mercury: Thanks. I don't know any good throat soothers as I rarely get sore throats (when I do, I mostly just ignore them) but make sure not to drink thickshakes or whatever. That soothing sensation is nothing more than the placebo effect. Get actual throat medication.

Eisenfaust: I'm afraid I don't speak German. In fact, I can only speak English. I did run your comment through an online translator and, unless I was mistaken, it was a positive comment. Thank you.

last-blue mage: Probably should have done this last chapter but your sentiments are welcome and by that I mean "thank you."

Enjoy.

Chapter 3: The first dungeon

"Jake…" Compa nudged Jacob's shoulder as he was asleep on the couch. Morning had come and it was time to go searching for the boss monster but only Compa was awake. "Wake up," she urged as she nudged him harder.

Jacob began to stir. Slowly, he opened his eyes and saw the blurry silhouette of the apprentice nurse. "Ugh… good morning, Compa…" he greeted as he sat up and rubbed his eyes.

"Good morning, Jake!" Compa responded in high spirits.

Jacob stood from the couch with some difficulty and stretched for a bit. "What time is it…? It feels incredibly early…"

Compa looked at the clock hanging above the door frame that led into the room where Jacob recovered and where now Neptune slept. "It's about nine o'clock. I thought it would be good to get up early and have breakfast before we took on the boss monster…" Suddenly, a look of panic set on Compa's face. "I'm sorry, is nine o'clock too early for you, Jake?" she asked while looking very frantic.

"No no no, it's fine," Jacob assured, "now calm down." After doing a few bicep curls, he sat back down. "Maybe my body clock's off here."

"Body clock?" Compa inquired.

"Yeah, you know; the thing in your body that tells you when to sleep and when to wake up."

This did nothing to eliminate Compa's confusion. "We have clocks in our bodies?"

"No, no, just… look, never mind." Jacob rubbed his forehead. "My body still hurts. Your couch isn't really sleeping material."

"You know, if you slept in the guest room with Neptune, you'd feel much better rested."

Jacob looked at Compa flatly. "The day I sleep in the same bed as a fourteen-year old girl will be the day that I lose all hope in humanity. That's indecent. On that note, how's Neptune?"

"She's not awake yet. I woke you first because she's more energetic than you and she'd wake up more easily. I'll go wake her now. Why don't you go into the kitchen and make some toast?" Compa went into the guest room and shut the door behind her, leaving Jacob to his devices.

Jacob decided to take Compa's advice and went to make himself some breakfast. He went into the kitchen and found the two-slice toaster in the corner of the bench easily enough and he went to the cupboard to find some bread. He found it easily enough, but then a thought went into his head:

I'm very hungry…

With that thought came an idea; he looked in the cupboards and, sure enough, found self-raising flour. He went to the fridge and took out an egg and a carton of milk. Checking the cupboards, he soon came across a frying pan and a measuring cup. Jacob smiled.

Waking Neptune up turned out to be an exercise that was much harder than it would seem. Compa's newfound black eye was proof that nudging the purple-haired girl on the shoulder was not the best idea. Therefore, she would need to find something to rouse Neptune from her snoring slumber without coming into bodily contact with her, but how?

Compa had a flash of inspiration. She went into the basement through the door in the guest room and, after a few minutes, came out with an old bokuto that looked like it would disintegrate upon touching anything if it didn't do so on its own volition… okay, maybe that was exaggerated but it was still probably the most rotten piece of wood on this side of reality. With it, she poked Neptune's cheek and snapped the wooden katana back before Neptune could grab it and crunch it into a fine powder. Neptune stirred a bit, but not enough. Compa poked her again. This time, it worked; Neptune was roused from her slumber.

"Ngh…" groaned Neptune as she woke up, obviously feeling better than Jacob. "Oh! Morning, Compa!"

"Good morning, Nep-nep!" replied Compa with equal cheer. "How are you?"

"Fit as a fiddle!" Neptune jumped off her bed and did a few martial arts moves to prove it. "I can take on the world! No ene- is that a katana? Gimme gimme gimme!"

Compa noticed that Neptune took an interest in her bokuto when the amnesiac snatched the thing out of Compa's hands and began inspecting it. "Oh, yes. Grandpa always kept it around as a bit of a relic," she explained. "Why, do you want it?"

"Mhm!" Neptune nodded enthusiastically.

"Then sure, you can use it."

"Hooray!" Neptune placed one foot on the bed and thrust her sword forward while placing her left hand on her hip. "With this ancient weapon, all enemies shall fear our… what's that smell?"

Compa also noticed the rather enticing aroma seeping into the guest room. "I… don't know. It's coming from the kitch… en…"

Neptune was already speeding out the door before Compa finished.

"Mornin', Jakey boy!" greeted Neptune as she appeared over the bench of the kitchen.

"Call me that again and something horrible will happen to you. Anyway, how are you?" Jacob asked as he used a spatula to lift from the frying pan-

"PANCAKES!" Neptune shouted eagerly, causing Jacob to wince. "Thanks a whole bunch, Jacob! Hey Compa! Jacob's making pancakes!"

"Really?" said Compa as she appeared beside Neptune with her black eye conveniently gone. "Oh, thank you, Jacob!"

"Not a problem. What happened to your eye?" he asked as he flipped another pancake onto a plate which already had five on it.

"Oh, it's nothing. You don't need to worry about it; it'll go away."

"… Well, okay then. Anyway, they're just about done. Take Neptune and sit down somewhere, please?"

"Absolutely!" Compa walked out to the living room. "Come on, Nep-Nep. Let him cook."

"Mm!" Neptune rubbed her stomach as she lay on the carpet. "That was good."

"Thanks," Jacob replied after he finished off his glass of milk. "We should probably get going now. Is there anything we need before we go?"

"Not really. I just need my syringe and then we can go," said Compa.

Jacob gave Compa a confused look. "… why would you need a syringe?"

Compa gave Jacob her own confused expression. "It's… my weapon? Most nurses use syringes to fight. I've got mine in the corner over there." She pointed to a giant syringe in the corner of the room.

"… It has star markings in its fluid."

"Don't worry about that, Jake." Compa stood up and Jacob and Neptune followed suit. "Now, do you have a weapon?"

"No."

Compa looked confused. "Why not? Don't you have monsters where you come from?"

"We have morally bankrupt humans but we don't have monsters like giant dragons or orcs," Jacob responded. "We don't need weapons; our soldiers, which are actually competent to the degree of being bloody nightmares, do the fighting for us."

"Wow. That sounds extremely boring," Neptune said. "What do you do for fun?"

"Play video games and not die."

"But what if you want to fight things?"

"Like I said, play video games."

"… okay then."

"Anyway," said Compa, "there's nothing we can do about that. I'm afraid you'll have to go in bare-handed. Now, if we have nothing else to do, let's get moving."

"Yahoo!" Neptune pumped her fist into the air. "I've had enough of this pointless filler! Let's go actually do something!"

"Is this the dungeon you found searching DungleMaps?" asked Neptune as she ran with her bokuto inside what seemed to be an old factory with the lovable brown tint of everything. Plenty of large generators were spaced apart along the walls closed in by mesh fencing. Large pipes were also sticking out of the walls and crates were stacked in inconspicuous areas. This sort of area will now be known as Factory #1. "Yeah, it feels like a dungeon with lots of tough monsters!"

"No, no strong monsters here," answered Compa. "I searched for 'dungeons with weak monsters'. We're not ready for the strong ones yet." Compa's answer prompted Neptune to look at Compa with an expression. Naming what that expression is would be a chore in itself but if Jacob had to guess, it was either disbelief, betrayal, horror or something else.

"Suck it up, princess," was Jacob's comment, as usual.

"But Jacob," Neptune started, which was also Jacob's cue to roll his eyes in exasperation, "this dungeon only has weaklings in it!"

"Nep-Nep, we're only beginners! Level one!" Compa attempted to reason with Neptune but she was having none of it if her crossed arms were of any indication. "We're not strong enough to take on stronger monsters!"

"Well then," Neptune began again, "since this is a weak dungeon, I'll just wait here where there are no monsters and you two can come get me when you find the boss." She walked over to a corner and sat down cross-legged away from Jacob and Compa.

Before Jacob had a chance to say anything, Compa cut in quite frantically. She wasn't very good at maintaining her composure in conflict (or anything else, for that matter). "Th-That's not fair! We're a party, so we're basically soul mates! Abandoning your party now goes against the rules of this world! You'll get punished by the goddess!"

That last part caught Neptune's attention. "Goddess?" she repeated, starry-eyed. "You mean not only are there monsters here but a goddess is, too?"

"Yeah, there's Purple Heart, Green Heart, White Heart and Black Heart of Planeptune, Leanbox, Lowee and Lastation respectively," Jacob answered.

"That's right," Compa continued. "Each planet is protected by a goddess and people-"

"Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa," Jacob interrupted. "'Planet'? What happened to 'landmass'?"

Compa's eyes widened for an instant as she realised her mistake. "Oh! Sorry, I got mixed up. Anyway," Compa turned back to Neptune, who was looking at her nails, "people go to the Basilicom to worship them and help govern each land." She suddenly looked solemn. "We have no idea where the monsters are coming from. Their power just grows and grows. Everyone thinks it's due to the goddesses' weakening powers. Heated discussions take place every night on the Basilicom's blog."

"Basilicom?" Neptune pondered for a moment. "So… what kinda place is that? Is one nearby? OH! Do they make cookies?"

Jacob sighed. "Neptune-"

"Nep-Nep, enough banter," Compa cut in with surprising authority. Apparently, she was as tired of this as he was. "We should get going before the weak monsters get tired of waiting for us." With that, the party walked down the corridor. Apparently, just hearing about goddesses is enough to break Neptune out of her temper tantrums.

After a few moments of walking, Jacob said "Hey, what's that?" He gestured towards a treasure chest that was lying at the corner of the corridor.

"A treasure chest! Yippee!" Neptune, being Neptune, dashed towards the wooden chest and eagerly opened it. "What is it? A rare item? New armor? Gimme gim-" Neptune was silent as she took the item out of the treasure chest very slowly. "It's… it's…"

"It's what, Neptune? Hurry it up."

"It's glorious… A thousand suns have burned out before this day but this image shall stay in my mind forever…" At this stage, Compa and Jacob were getting kind of worried. Well, Compa was; Jacob was just sort of put-off by Neptune's attitude. So they simply walked over to see what the big deal was. What Jacob saw utterly bewildered him.

"A wooden sword." He looked at Neptune with a completely straight face, hiding his are-you-kidding-me expression. "You got this excited over a wooden sword."

"It's a wooden sword in good condition," Neptune insisted, holding the stick up like it was the Kusanagi no Tsurugi. "It's much better than the one I already have! And you know what they say about wooden katanas: "they're even better"!"

"Right, whatever," Jacob said, wishing to get all this nonsense over and done with. "Can I at least have your old sword?"

"NO!" Neptune shouted quite defensively as she held the old rotting sword close to her body and glared at Jacob as hard as she could without having her eyeballs explode.

"Why not?" asked a confused Jacob. "It's old and you have a replacement."

"So I can duel wield it, of course!" Neptune took the old bokuto into her left hand and the new bokuto into her right and began making a series of elaborate dual-wielding techniques. This ended when she sliced horizontally outwards with both swords and hit the treasure chest's open lid with the old bokuto, breaking the old rotting thing in two.

"… Oops." Neptune rubbed the back of her head sheepishly.

"Let's get moving," Jacob said quickly.

The party advanced down the corridor. Everyone was kind of quiet, only really thinking about whatever they were thinking about. There weren't any other treasure chests to be seen and there weren't any monsters in si-

"HOLY CRAP!" shouted Jacob as two… things appeared in front of the party from above. To call them monsters would be kind of misleading; one of them was a green Space Invader with yellow antennae and the other was a blue gel with a dog's snout.

"A Pixelvader and a Dogoo!" said Compa as she readied her needle, holding it at her hip like a rifle.

"Alright, let's take 'em out!" Neptune hyped herself up as she held her wooden sword.

Jacob didn't say anything as he got into a fighting stance; right foot behind his left and two raised fists. The battle was going to start.

Five minutes later, neither side had made a move. The enemies were just… standing there. Neptune was still in her battle stance and Compa still had her needle ready, although she kept rocking her hips side to side. Jacob, on the other hand, was stretching.

"What's taking so long for them to do anything?" Jacob asked Compa.

"It's not their turn," replied Compa. "Neptune has the highest Speed stat so she goes first. I do wonder what she's thinking, though, because it shouldn't take this long to select an action."

Jacob was dumbstruck. "You actually practise turn-based combat?"

"Yes," Compa affirmed. "It's a tradition of Gamindustri that all combatants must take turns attacking. I'm not sure how it started but it's been that way ever since."

"… That is one of the dumbest things I have ever heard." Jacob suddenly had a thought. He looked over at the monsters, which were just standing still. "So the monsters won't attack until Neptune attacks?"

"Yes, that's right."

"Then I can do this." Jacob calmly walked over to the inattentive Dogoo, raised his foot very high behind him and then brought it down to give the slime a very hard kick to send it flying backwards.

That was the intention. What actually happened was that Jacob slowed down at the last second and lightly tapped the Dogoo. Neptune, Compa and even the Pixelvader looked at him oddly (as the Pixelvader's expression never changed, Jacob made an educated guess).

"Jacob, what are you doing?" asked Neptune.

"I'm trying to kick this thing while you're doing nothing." Jacob tried again but this time he missed on purpose.

"But this is turn-based combat!"

"Which is stupid and arbitrary tripe!" Jacob tried again but he didn't even bother kicking; he just brought his foot down to the ground.

"… Jake, are you okay?" asked Compa. "I know you're committed to this so why can't you kick the Dogoo?"

Jacob was silent. During his silence, he tried to kick the Dogoo again but only ended with another gentle tap. The Dogoo seemed to look at him with pity, so it fell backwards. This only made him feel worse. Finally, he looked at his two friends. "I have an aversion to hitting things."

Neptune was puzzled. "Why? Are you afraid the Dogoo will eat your shoe or something? Don't worry, they're not-"

"Because I could hurt whatever I'm hitting."

"… That's kind of the point of hitting things."

"But I'm a pacifist."

Compa looked surprised. "You're against violence?"

"Killing, actually. I'm fine with violence but I still have a hard time hitting things."

"Oh, you poor thing," said Compa. "I'd help you but I don't want to be punished by the goddess."

Frustrated at his non-violent nature and the stupidity of the world he was in, Jacob sighed before turning back to the Dogoo and trying again. This time, he actually connected with enough force to send the Dogoo back, if only a few centremetres. Now it looked rather irritated. Jacob could tell it was in fact irritated because it then proceeded to jump on him and attack.

"AH IT'S ON ME GET IT OFF GET IT OFF GET IT OFF!" Jacob screamed as he grasped the small gel monster and ripped it off of his person before slamming it into the ground around him twice before throwing incapacitated Dogoo away. When it was a few feet away, it burst into data.

Jacob looked back at Compa and Neptune, who seemed bewildered and amazed. "Sorry, I panicked," he answered as he stood up. Before he could walk back to Neptune and Compa, the Pixelvader jumped at him. Before Jacob could shout, a loud bang preceded the Pixelvader bursting into data. Shocked, Jacob looked back at Neptune, who was holding a revolver with a smoking barrel. Compa was also confused but not so much as Jacob to miss the space where the monsters appeared drop five green bottles.

"Where the hell were you keeping that?" Jacob asked as he walked up to Neptune as the party proceeded on after Compa gathered up the bottles.

"I 'unno," replied Neptune simply before she placed the gun in her non-existent holster and the gun simply disappeared.

"Well, can I have it? You saw how I went back there."

"You can't have my gun! I need it to dual wield with my sword!"

"Did it ever occur to you that you suck at dual wielding?"

"I do not!" Neptune held her sword in her right hand and her gun in her left. "See that pipe up there?" Jacob looked up and saw two pipes but he guessed that she was talking about the circular one and not the rectangular ventilation shaft. "I'll shoot down a part of it and then bat it to that wall over there with my sword! Ready?"

She didn't wait for an answer as she fired upwards. She hit the ventilation shaft instead which dropped a segment towards Jacob. Neptune tried to jump and hit it with a left swipe but she attacked too soon; instead of hitting the segment, she whacked Jacob square on the cheek, resulting in him releasing an "OW!" as he was sent tumbling to the floor while the segment was left untouched.

"Jake!" Compa called as she ran towards him to inspect his swollen cheek. "Are you okay!"

"What the hell is wrong with you, Neptune…?" he groaned.

"Sorry…" Neptune apologised as she returned her weapons. "But I swear, by the time this journey is over, I will master the art of dual wielding a gun and a sword in either hand!"

"I hope so… this hurts…"

"Don't worry Jake, have some reflex." Compa poured the green liquid of a bottle down Jacob's throat. He nearly spat it out but he restrained himself.

"What is that stuff…?" he asked. "It tastes like mint…"

"That's reflex. It boosts the body's healing abilities. Scientists tried something like this before but it exhausted the body's energy supply, so they just made a healing agent that can be ingested. It's very useful; a lot of nurses use it."

Compa helped Jacob to get back on his feet. Much to his amazement, he could already feel the pain fading. Furthering his amazement was the feeling of his cheek getting smaller. "Whoa, this stuff's awesome," he remarked. "I really should take that stuff home with me. Where'd you get it from?"

"The monsters," Compa answered. "Defeating monsters drops either reflex, detoxin, gelatin and tuffmil, which can be used to synthesise potions."

"… Okay then."

"Hey guys, I found another treasure chest!" called Neptune excitedly from an intersection, beckoning Compa and Jacob to come over. Once they did, they found Neptune holding an item in either hand; some sort of hammer and a bell. To call the former a 'sledgehammer' would be inaccurate because your typical sledgehammer resembled a brick at the end of a stick while the hammer that Neptune held resembled a steel beer keg perpendicular to the stick it was attached to. The bell was your typical ringing bell at the end of a stick.

"What on Earth are those?" Jacob asked.

"I dunno, but you can have this." Neptune tossed the hammer to Jacob, who caught it but collapsed almost immediately due to its immense weight. "Oh, is it too heavy?"

"Yes…" Jacob groaned as he stood up, leaving the hammer on the floor. "Look, I know I'm six feet tall but I'm not exactly strong."

"Aw, bummer." Neptune easily picked up the hammer after she gave the bell to Compa, who inspected it. "Well, what are we going to do with it?"

"You carry it around; it could be useful." Neptune put away the hammer in the same place as here gun and sword (apparently in hyperspace). "Now, I predict that the boss is this way," declared Jacob as he pointed down the corridor that branched off from the one they were in now.

"I get it!" said Neptune. "Smart thinking, Jacob! Let's move!" Neptune took point as the party travelled down the new corridor. After a right turn, they came across a flimsy steel wire fence.

"Okay, we need to get rid of it," Jacob said. "How are we-"

"Outta the way!" Neptune took out her newly acquired hammer and twirled it around like a show-off as she walked over to the fence. "Think you're so tough, do ya?" she taunted the inanimate object as she lifted the hammer over head in preparation to strike it. "I'll break you!" she shouted excitedly as she swung the hammer downwards to the ground, giving those behind her a view of her-

"AAH!" Jacob's shout couldn't be heard over the crashing fence and no one could see that he covered his eyes with his hand. "Neptune!" he called. "Why aren't you wearing shorts?"

Neptune put away her hammer and looked at Jacob, confused by his reaction. "What do you mean, why aren't I wearing shorts? Because I want to."

"It's indecent! When you bend over like that, people can see your underwear! Compa, do you agree?" However, Compa was strangely silent. She kept looking at Neptune with a glazed look and a red fluid was beginning to leak out of her nose. "Compa!" Jacob snapped his fingers to get her attention.

"Huh, what?" Compa snapped back into reality and looked around frantically. "What's wrong? Did an enemy appear?"

"No," said Jacob, "I was just trying to get your attention. You dosed off."

"Oh…" Compa's cheeks turned bright red. "S-sorry… did you need something?"

"No, we just busted down the gate. Let's go. And Neptune, we're still getting you shorts after all this is done."

Neptune pouted. "I want to walk around without shorts."

"That's nice. I want world peace so I guess neither of us will get what we want. Now let's go."

And so the party proceeded (again) through the rather samey factory until they came across a large room that was, for all intents and purposes, a square version of one of the corridors. What caught the party's eye, however, was the glowing purple circle on the floor at the end of the room.

Compa walked over and stood on it. "I've never seen anything like this," she began. "In all of the books I've read, none of them have ever mentioned a glowing circle; they just said that a monster stood in one place waiting for the adventurers to touch them."

"What kind of books do you read?" asked Jacob.

"Oh, you know, fantasy manga, slice-of-life manga, romance manga, cooking books, the usual."

"And where did you read about a monster just politely waiting for the adventurers?"

"It was in the manga edition of the first GG game. Light Wizard, Dark Wizard, Soldier and Bandit were going into this dungeon, right, and the monster was waiting for them three floors below, not doing anything." Compa seemed to get excited as she talked. You know how it is; you find the perfect opportunity to gush about something you like to someone and you take it. "It was awesome! In the middle of battle, Light Wizard and Soldier confessed-"

"Compa," interrupted Jacob, "as interested as I am in this manga of yours, we're kind of in a hurry here and I fail to see how this is relevant at all to the magic circle."

"Hey Compa!" said Neptune. "Try ringing your bell! It'll call the monster!"

Both Compa and Jacob looked at Neptune oddly. "What makes you think that?" asked Jacob.

"Histy told me! She said that those magic circles respond to the Descent Bell to call a powerful monster! You see, she's been giving me a tutorial throughout this entire dungeon, like how to bash down that gate and how to open treasure chests."

"That's very helpful, Nep-Nep!" cheered Compa, although Jacob just sighed and rubbed his forehead. "Okay! Come on out, monster!" Compa called as she rang the bell. The circle on the floor faded and none of them were prepared for what dropped from the ceiling.

It was a spider; a big brown one. It had three crab legs on either side of the middle part of its body and two smaller and thinner ones with clawed feet on either side of what would be its head with black fangs the size of Neptune's torso making up most of its 'face'. To make matters worse, it had a strangely humanoid upper body attached to the spider body at its waist with two clawed arms, its right one carrying a massive golden sword resembling a key with some sort of golden statue… thing acting as a pommel. Its head resembled a rhino, only with a massive horn with a diamond-shaped tip. Overall, it was huge and the entire party was panicking.

"GUARD VERMIN!" shouted Compa just as the huge thing brought back its massive sword to swing overhead at her. Thankfully, she was quick enough to get out of the way in time, causing the sword to embed itself into the ground. This allowed the group to retreat, regroup and rethink.

"It's not going by turn-based combat rules! What are we going to do?" asked Compa.

"Well, my first idea was to have Neptune trip it up with her bullets and then attack its weak spot but it has too many legs for that. Neptune, any bright ideas?" Jacob looked over to Neptune, who seemed to be in some sort of trance of thought. "Neptune?" Jacob asked again.

"Shush," she said quickly, causing Jacob to shut up. Whatever Neptune was thinking about, Jacob hoped that she'd finish soon; the Guard Vermin got its sword out of the ground and jumped towards the ground with surprising agility and ease.

"What the HELL!" Jacob ran to one side with Neptune as Compa went the other way as the boss swung its sword again, although this time it impacted the ground more lightly, evidenced by how much more easily it got its sword out again. It looked towards Compa who fired upon it with her bullet-shooting syringe (which surprised Jacob) but it shrugged off the shots quite easily.

"Compa!" Neptune shouted as she rushed forward. "I'm gonna get you for this, you meanie!" She leapt into the air and… something sort of unexpected happened.

From Neptune's body, green streams of data emerged and surrounded Neptune. In a single moment, the data was gone but Neptune was different. She was taller, her hair was longer and kept in two braids at the back of her head and her pupil-less eyes had bright blue irises. Her D-pad hairclips were replaced with small black domes with purple X's on them. She wore a form-fitting black bodysuit covering her entire body (with the exception of the top of her more developed bust and the upper half of her thighs, most likely for fanservice) with bits of purple and grey here and there. She also had strange circular sci-fi butterfly wings that seemed to be detached from her back. To top it all off, in her right hand was a long black katana with an elaborate diamond-shaped tsuba and a purple edge.

Jacob recognised her as Purple Heart.

The monster was quick to swipe at her but the size and weight of its sword meant that it had no chance in hell of hitting its small and nimble target. Purple Heart easily dodged the attack and slashed her sword when she was level with the humanoid torso. The Guard Vermin burst into data after a moment and dropped a purple… something onto the ground. Purple Heart floated to the ground, walked over to it and picked it up.

"Well, that was… anti-climactic," stated Jacob. Compa didn't say anything; she simply looked at Purple Heart with a shocked expression that persisted after she returned to being Neptune. Neptune looked quite sheepish. It was a weirdly quiet moment.

Then Neptune looked as if someone just tapped her shoulder from behind. "Histy! Thanks for that awesome tutorial. What's up?"

Compa, who was looking rather calm moments ago, was now confused. "Histy? Nep-nep, who are you talking to? Nobody is here except for you, me and Jacob."

"Histoire can communicate with Neptune telepathically," Jacob elaborated.

"Oh."

Neptune also appeared to be confused. "You can't hear her? Histy, can you talk to Compa and Jacob, too?" A few moments passed and then Neptune looked back at her friends. "Sorry guys, I'll just tell you what she says later. Anyway Histy, I found something weird and shiny just now… Seal? Where you at, anyway?" After a few more moments, Neptune suddenly looked pumped. "Four Key Fragments? If I do this fetch quest, I can save you, right? So where are they?"

"Do you have any idea what they're talking about?" Compa asked Jacob.

"Yeah, Histoire's trapped somewhere and she needs Neptune to help her out and I'm assuming that these Key Fragments are needed to get her free."

"Oh, okay."

"So," began Neptune again, "I get that I hafta save you, but should I really do all this for someone I don't even know? … Hmm, it's tough for me to say no, but finding all these thingies sounds like a real bore-chore."

"Neptune!" Jacob shouted. "Are you seriously considering abandoning someone in need just because it's boring to help them out?"

Neptune didn't seem that concerned, however. "Yeah? I mean, Histy's one person. Can't I save the world instead? Wait…" Neptune was listening to someone else. Jacob tapped his foot. "Huh? Really?" said Neptune, looking more excited. "Oh, well, okay then! Don't stop there! Pump me up some more!"

"Neptune," Jacob cut in again. "What. Did she. Just say?"

"I get the impression this wouldn't be so boring if we could actually hear what Histoire was saying," Compa commented.

"Sorry Compa, she says she can only talk to me. Anyway, she said that she's basically the world's everything or something, so saving her is the same as saving the world!"

"Really? Well, that sounds like good incentive to go out and do what she wants us to do. Let's go." Just then, Neptune's stomach rumbled. "Fine, let's get something to eat."

"Yay!" cheered Neptune before they walked towards the entrance of the dungeon.

So, yeah. I get the impression that this was a badly written chapter. Constructive criticism is, as always, welcome. As are comments in general.

One thing that bugs me about this god damn site is that I can't type in something like "AH-ITS-ON-ME-GET-IT-OFF-GET-IT-OFF-GET-IT-OFF!" (please eliminate the hyphens) without the website just eliminating it. I presume this is what happened to Neptune's falling scream all the way in the first chapter.