Finally, we have left the Land of White Nothing's Happening and are moving over to the Land of Green Something's More Than Likely Going To Happen. To thank all patrons for their patience, they will be rewarded with review responses:

Saturn56: Two beta readers and they still didn't pick that up. -_- Ah well.

Eisenfaust: She's spoken to him before, probably, maybe, I beg your pardon, he wasn't trying to, I'll think about it, I didn't think about it at the time. Thanks.

SS7x3: Ah, the wonders of being a reader and constantly speculating. And it's okay.

Now, dear readers, let us cross our fingers.

Chapter 24: Hoping the Grass is Greener

Fed up with Lowee, the party promptly made their way to the Sky Bridge and walked into the dungeon that connected the landmass to Leanbox. Needless to say, it took them no time at all to come out through the other side. After the green-lit cave, Jacob found himself pleasantly surprised by the clear skies and the lush green landscape that spread before the party.

However, it was in the city where Jacob found himself slightly awed. Standing in the main plaza that was paved with grey setts, he somewhat not-moodily took in the nearby buildings of which there was a surprising variety, with a church that had a tall tower in the middle of it, what may have been a library close by, market stalls and other buildings that served other currently unknown purposes. They had either grey walls of smooth stone or beige bricks that had noticeable lines and their roofs were covered in pantiles that were coloured a single colour of red, blue, green or whatever sensible colour took the fancy of the roofers that worked on the buildings. Around the main plaza were old-style lampposts made from black steel although, due to it currently being the afternoon, they weren't currently on. Leanbox wasn't entirely covered in stone; there were actually quite a few bushes growing around some of the more isolated buildings like the church and there were trees growing near some of the buildings.

IF noticed his lack of ranting. "You seem to be enjoying yourself," she noted.

With a smile on his face, Jacob inhaled the landmass' fresh air through his nose. When he'd had his fill, he exhaled out through his mouth. "It's not oppressively dark or trying to poison us like Lastation and it's not cold and ridiculous like Lowee. I think I'm going to like it here."

"You betcha, Sparky!" Neptune chirped, chipping his enthusiasm. "It's so old here! It's like we were in a medieval theme park and went back in time there!"

"I've always quite enjoyed the medieval aesthetic," Nisa commented. "It feels like I have more opportunities to save those in need here!"

Jacob looked back at IF. Strangely enough, she seemed less exasperated than normal, like the party's usual nonsense didn't affect her at all for once. "You seem a bit chipper, yourself," he told her. "What's up?"

IF wasn't expecting such a thing to be said but she quickly composed herself. "I like Leanbox better than the other landmasses. It's got cleaner air and a better atmosphere, like you said." IF pulled out her pink cell phone and began typing on it.

"Fair enough. So what do we do now?"

"We already cleared out a dungeon. Let's just play around for the rest of the day!" suggested Neptune right before she decided to sprint away.

"Oh no you don't." IF grabbed Neptune's hoodie sleeve before she could fleetly flee the scene. "We have things to do first." The brunette then turned her attention to Jacob. "Hey, can you go to the Basilicom and go through the usual routine?"

Jacob raised an eyebrow. "Aren't you afraid I'll mess everything up?"

"You're more relaxed right now and you've learned your lesson. Plus, Lady Green Heart's not like Blanc. I think you'll get along with her."

Jacob crossed his arms. "Yeah, alright, that sounds fair enough. Where's the Basilicom?"

"It should be..." IF trailed off, suddenly growing unsure as to how to direct him. Sighing, she took out a cell phone that was in every way identical to her pink one aside from being green. After pressing a few buttons, she handed it over to Jacob. "That map should tell you where it is. If you have any problems, just open up the contacts menu and call IF Pink."

"Right, thanks." Jacob reached to take the phone but, when he tried to tug it away from her, she held on tight. "... Um, IF?"

Jacob looked at IF with confusion but she looked at him with... desperation, maybe? Her eyebrows were furrowed, at least. She seemed like she was desperately trying to hold in her emotions.

"... IF, can you give me the phone, please?" Jacob asked.

Finally, with the slightest break in IF's mask of strength, she let go of the green cell phone and let Jacob look at the top screen. As she said, there was a map. "Thanks very much."

"Don't," IF began with a desperate and vengeful voice that nearly made Jacob jump, "break it. Am I clear?"

"Y-Yes," Jacob stammered.

IF kept her stern gaze on him. She didn't look like she promised a hellish fate if he defied her anymore, though, so that was a plus. "... Good."

"Um, IF...?" Jacob started hesitantly. "How do I open the contacts menu?"

IF rolled her eyes. "Press the green phone one, moron."

"Ah, I figured. I just wanted to be certain." He pressed the button marked with a green phone and, sure enough, the contacts menu opened. "Ah, it works."

"Good." IF turned her back to him. "Are you going to leave now?"

"Actually, how do I get back to the map?" Jacob turned the phone in his hand so that IF could see its screen.

IF sighed as she turned around and approached him. "Okay, I should've seen that coming. First, you..."

While IF was helping Jacob learn how to use her phone, Neptune turned to Compa. "Hey, you think we should ask Iffy if we could also borrow one of her phones?"

"We don't need to, Nep-Nep." Compa pulled out her own phone from her disc. "We can just call Iffy- I mean, IF on my phone if we need to."

"Actually, cell phones don't work here," Gust explained.

"What? Why?" Compa asked, surprised.

"Calling someone from Leanbox requires special service. Monthly payments."

"Surely you jest? That's outrageous!" Nisa cried out indignantly.

Compa looked at IF who seemed to have finished telling Jacob about the phone's features. "So then... why do her phones work?"

"She must pay the monthly fee," Nisa answered.

"Alright, thanks." Jacob then turned his gaze towards the rest of the party. "So where do we regroup?"

"We'll meet back at the front of the inn in about, say, two hours," answered IF.

"Great. See you all later," he said before turning around and walking away.

Compa waved goodbye like the rest of the party but she noticed that IF seemed to be nervous. "IF, is something wrong?"

IF's eyes were closed and her fists were clenched. "He has... my phone," she explained, her eyebrows twitching. "If he doesn't return it safely... I..."

"No need to worry, IF!" The party's heroine walked up to IF and smacked her hard on the back of her blue coat as a gesture that was meant to come across as encouraging. "My diligent student will not be so clumsy as to break your phone or drop it into the yawning abyss that rests below us."

IF shivered. "Don't even joke about it..."

"Perhaps spending time in forest could help with relaxing?" Gust suggested. "Gust could use hand gathering materials."

"Huh?" IF snapped out of her anxiety as she turned to the alchemist. "Oh, yeah. Sure, I guess."

"Excellent! Into the forest we go!" Gust excitedly grabbed IF's hand and dragged her along with her to the forest.

Neptune placed her hands on her hips. "Huh. Guess that leaves just the three of us."

"You mean just the two of us, my darling sister!" Nisa proclaimed. "I, on the other hand, have wrongs to right! Tally-ho!" With a mighty leap, Nisa jumped onto the roof of the nearest building and ran along it until she was out of sight.

"... W-Well..." Compa started after a moment of silence, "What do you want to do now?"

Neptune put her hand to her chin as if to think. "Hm..."

Finding the Basilicom proved to be a simple task. After all, it was a repulsively extravagant church on top of an island floating in the sky. How hard would it be to miss? He felt a bit embarrassed asking for the phone now. Upon arriving at the gondola, he used his jetpack to fly over to the island, pulling a few stunts along the way for the sake of practice. He walked through the forest surrounding the Basilicom and found it. Again, it was no different to the previous four Basilicoms they ventured to, right down to having someone guard the front. This man looked exactly like the one that stood in front of Lastation's Basilicom and the one that Neptune met in Planeptune's Basilicom; he had a hat that would have been a tricorne if it wasn't round, hair at the back of his head that was lazily spiking out behind him, an open book in his left hand and a closed high-neck coat. The man noticed Jacob and might have smiled.

"Hello. Welcome to Leanbox's Basilicom," the man greeted kindly. "How may I help you?"

"Hi, I was wondering if I could speak to your CPU, please?" Jacob requested. "I need some help with something."

The man in front of him shifted a bit, possibly from disappointment for disappointing the visitor. "I am sorry but Lady Green Heart is currently unavailable as of present."

"Oh, that's a shame." Jacob looked unperturbed, however, and extended a hand to the guard, who was a bit confused. "My name's Jacob, by the way. I'm offering you a handshake, by the way."

"Oh, I see." No longer confused, the man took Jacob's hand and gave him a middle-strength handshake before disengaging. "Unfortunately, as one of the Basilicom's Sanctified, I am not allowed to disclose my name. However, I will remember you fondly."

"Thank you very much, sir."

"Now, while our Lady is busy, Archbishop Yvoire inside is more than capable of assisting you. Feel free to go inside," said the Sanctified as he opened the door.

"Thank you." Jacob went to take a step inside but stopped himself as a question came to mind. "Hey, this might sound strange but do I look like a silhouette to you?"

Indeed, the Sanctified seemed a bit confused. "Oh, well, uh... yes?"

Jacob made a 'hm' noise. "I see. Thanks." He then proceeded inside, not caring about the Sanctified bewildered eyes looking at his back. He made his way inside to the prayer room, intending to find this Yvoire character but found a familiar silhouette. "Is that you, Conversation?" he asked, mildly surprised.

"H-Huh?!" Lowee's Evangelist jumped and quickly turned around to the one who addressed her. After seeing it was just Jacob, she let out a sigh of relief. "Ah, it's you, uh... Jason, was it?"

"Jacob, actually. Good to see you again." Although Jacob talked in a cordial manner, he remembered their last discussion about Overlord Momus and was on his toes.

"Sorry, you caught me off guard. I must say, it is a surprise to see you again," Conversation returned. "It wasn't that long since we met in Lowee."

"We hit a bit of a snag and came over here. I was hoping to speak to the CPU or Yvoire."

"Yvoire?" Conversation turned her head to more than likely look at another silhouette that was walking towards them. "That would be him."

"Ah, thank you."

"Are you two acquainted? Regardless, there is no need to bother Lowee's Evangelist for information about my landmass," Yvoire stated before stopping in front of the two of them. He looked just like the Sanctified outside despite most likely being in a higher position of power that would suggest a different uniform or, at the very least, hat. "I am Yvoire, Archbishop for Lady Green Heart. Do you have any inquiries about Leanbox?"

"I am Jacob. It is a pleasure to meet you, sir." Jacob wouldn't extend a handshake to someone as prestigious as an Archbishop but he did nod his head in acknowledgement. "I was hoping to talk with you..." He gestured to Conversation with his head, "... although the issues are a bit sensitive."

Yvoire seemed to be judging his words. "I will not pretend to understand your circumstances but I will respect them." He might have turned his attention to Lowee's Evangelist. "Conversation, if you'll please excuse us for the moment?"

Conversation gave a slight bow. "Of course. I will be seeing you later, Archbishop." Conversation then left Jacob and Yvoire in the prayer room and walked around the first corner she came across.

Yvoire turned back to the male in front of him. "Say your piece now, boy."

"Of course, sorry." Jacob cleared his throat out of nervousness. "I'm actually with a party and we're trying to find an item called a Key Fragment. I've been told Green Heart was busy?"

Yvoire, rather than respond, stood silent.

"... Um, excuse me?" The moment was a bit dragged out and Jacob was getting a bit concerned.

"Oh, I beg your pardon," Yvoire apologised, snapped out of his reverie. "Yes, I am afraid she is... busy." Yvoire hesitated on that last word as if unconvinced of it himself but he didn't say anything else. "However, I am her right hand in regards to running this nation. Anything you wish to discuss with her can be discussed with me."

"Alright then. I'm looking for an item called a Key Fragment. I don't suppose you'd know where I'd be able to find it?"

Yvoire shook his head. "I am sorry but I have never heard of such an item."

"Apparently, it's kept in a dungeon guarded by strong monsters."

"Oh, is... that so?" Yvoire seemed underwhelmed by the information. "Forgive me but, when you say 'strong', what do you mean, precisely?"

"To be completely honest, I don't know. That's just what I was told. We found Planeptune's Key Fragment in a tutorial dungeon, for God's sake."

"A tutorial dungeon? Have you tried going to one here, then?"

"We tried that back in Lastation and that didn't do anything. I think it means strong as in relative to us."

"I see... I think," responded the Archbishop, slightly irritated. "Well, I'm afraid I don't know how strong you or your party are."

"S'all right. I wasn't expecting you to, anyway. The first Key Fragment was actually guarded by a Guard Vermin and I think the others might be as well."

Yvoire's eyes (or maybe even eye, for all anyone knew) might have shot open in surprise. "Guard Vermins? Are those not extinct?"

"Well, we've been told that a lot but we did see one."

Yvoire's right hand, not holding a book or any other object, went up maybe to his chin as he pondered this. "Well, I have heard of no dungeon that holds a Guard Vermin. I am afraid we are unable to help you."

"Eh, it's alright." Having expected this, Jacob wasn't concerned much. "I don't suppose there are any troublesome dungeons that you need cleared or something?"

Yvoire sighed. "I do not feel comfortable with sending civilians to dungeons. What is your party like?"

"Well, there's six of us including a nurse, an alchemist and a heroine who you might know as Nisa. We're very strong, mind."

"Nisa?" Yvoire repeated, possibly raising an eyebrow. "I... think I may have heard that name before." The Archbishop then gave Jacob a map that he pulled out from behind him. "Very well, then. This is a military map of dungeons in Leanbox detailing the monsters within them as well as item drops. You look to be capable enough."

Jacob smiled humbly. "I'm actually one of the weaker members of the party. The others are too strong for me to keep up."

Yvoire chuckled a bit. "Then my faith appears to be well-placed." The Archbishop then handed the map to Jacob, who then contained it within his disc. "Is that all you require?"

"Yes. Wait, no." Jacob clapped his hands together. "This might be a weird question but do I look like a silhouette to you?"

Yvoire seemed a bit taken aback by the inquiry. "Um... yes, you do. Why, should you not?"

"Oh, it's nothing. Don't worry about it. See you later," Jacob farewelled before leaving the Basilicom.

"Happy hunting, Jacob." Yvoire then turned around to venture to another room. However, he came across Conversation hiding around the next corner. "... Were you eavesdropping, Evangelist?"

"Forgive me, Archbishop. It is not within my duties but, for the sake of Lowee- no, the sake of the world..." Conversation looked towards where Jacob exited the Basilicom, "... there are some matters that I must stay on top of."

"I do not understand," Yvoire responded frankly.

Conversation sighed. "I have duties to attend to, unfortunately. May we discuss this here later tonight?"

If Yvoire was exasperated by this secret-keeping, he didn't show it. Although, given that he was a silhouette, there was a chance he did and it just couldn't be picked up. "Very well, then."

During that whole scenario, Gust, who was carrying her broom, and IF were travelling around a nearby forest. Unlike Lowee's snow-covered forests, this one was very bright and cheery. Actually, it was more like a meadow that had trees spread around sparsely and a short layer of grass covering the floor, although there were patches of longer grass here and there. The sunlight shining on the green vegetation made it delightful to look at and would ease the worries of any travellers.

IF seemed to be the only exception to the rule. "Stop shivering," Gust sternly ordered.

"I can't help it," IF answered. "Jacob has my phone. He's probably broken it by now."

Gust rolled her eyes. "No he hasn't. Put it aside. Gather herbs."

With a groan, IF massaged her head as if it'd help her calm down. "You know I love those phones, right? All nine of them that I keep in their own boxes around my belt." IF gestured with her hand to her belt of nine cell phone pouches. "I swear, if something happens to that phone, I will beat him so hard he'll feel it when he reloads his save..."

"IF, calm down," said Gust. "Now, you go over there," Gust pointed to her right with her broom, "and gather flowers that look like white clouds on sticks."

"I know what cotton flowers look like," IF responded, dull irritation burning inside.

"Good. Now, I go over there," Gust pointed forward with her broom, "and gather other ingredients. See you later." Having given her instructions, Gust walked forward to carry out her self-assigned tasks.

"Yeah, see ya," IF said indifferently as she walked off to gather her materials.

Walking for a couple of minutes did only a little to soothe IF's nerves. The mere thought of Jacob handling one of her precious phones was keeping her on edge and she kept overlooking entire bushes of cotton flowers. "Look..." IF began talking to herself as she started focusing on her task and picking the plants, "Jacob's a reasonable and trustworthy guy. He's not like Neptune or Compa. He's going to hold onto that phone even if his hand catches on fire. He'll complain about it but he won't drop the phone. You have nothing to worry about."

IF picked another flower but found herself not moving for the next two seconds.

"This is hopeless!" she cried out as she fell back against the comfortable grass, exasperated. "I don't care who it is, no one should have my phones! I need those! How can this day possibly get any worse?!"

"Hey, what are you doing there?"

IF's eyes shot open as she was greeted by an unfamiliar voice. She tilted her head back even further to get an upside-down view of the person that stood over her. Surprisingly, it was a crimson-haired girl who was around about the same height as Neptune and her dark grey eyes conveyed that she seemed to have the same amount of energy. Framing her face was many bangs, the largest of which having a white stripe that covered almost all of it, and her hair was held in an R shape on the left side of her head by a black string with two tan beads. She wore a black red-laced gold-trimmed corset over a dark grey gold-trimmed camisole that had a neck that was buttoned up by a sky blue magatama that was placed directly over an ovoid cut in her dress. Her sleeves were, as always in this world, detached. They were frilly at the top and red with pale pink cherry blossoms on the lower part right above the gold and black finishing trim, which really added to her oriental aesthetic. From her waist hung five large red gold-trimmed cherry blossom petals with pink cherry blossoms printed near the tips which somewhat concealed her black red-trimmed bike shorts. It was easy to miss her large red geta, however, when she had a golden Eastern dragon coiling around her stomach and sitting patiently on her shoulder.

"... Hi," IF answered back, looking more at the dragon than the girl herself. "I'm picking flowers for a friend."

Hearing this, the red-haired girl's eyes brightened with excitement. "Flowers? Who are they for? A childhood friend? A tsundere?"

"N-No, actually," IF responded, a bit flustered. "They're for one of my friends. She's an alchemist."

The new girl seemed a bit thrown off but her zeal wasn't diminished at all. "Ooh, you're so nice!" Eagerly, she extended an open hand to the brunette. "R-E-D spells Red. That's my name! What's yours?"

"I'm IF. No, not If. Just IF. I know, it's confusing." IF tiredly took the girl's hand in hers and shook it. "Nice to meet you, too."

"... I was offering to help you up," Red explained, confused.

"Oh, sorry. I'm a bit tired." IF reached for Red's still extended hand again and allowed herself to be helped to her feet. As she stood, IF realised that Red wasn't as short as she thought she was. She seemed to be as tall as Neptune, give or take a centremetre. "By the way, what are you doing here?"

"Well..." Red coyly held her hands behind her back as she swayed from side to side. "I was just having a stroll through these woods before I saw you. That's when I decided..." All of a sudden, the young girl ran forward and latched onto IF's jacket, looking at her with the biggest smile on her face, "... that I want you to be my wifey!"

"W-What?!" IF exclaimed in shock. "A wife? Where's this coming from?"

Red released her hold on IF and stepped back a bit. "Well, I love you and I'm making you my wifey. First comes love, then comes marriage, then there's a bit more after that but I don't think we're allowed to say it in a PG-rated game. That's how it works, right Iffy?"

"Why are you calling me Iffy?! And yeah, that's how it goes, but... but..."

IF's speech slowed to a stop as she noticed Red looking more and more dejected as she talked. Finally, IF came to a complete stop. Red, however, didn't speak right away. Her eyes didn't focus on IF and it was only after a moment or two that she spoke again. "... You don't wanna be my wifey?"

Despite the circumstances, IF put on a well-meaning smile, even if the rest of her face indicated towards her concern. "That's really not the point."

This seemed to be enough to snap Red out of her funk and make her wear her usual smile again. "Okay, then it's decided! I have obtained my first wifey! Now I gotta look for more!" Without so much as a farewell, Red ran off into the forest. Or perhaps out of it. It was hard to tell.

All the while, IF just stood on the spot, dumbfounded.

"How is flower picking going?"

"Whoa!" IF jumped at Gust's sudden question and quickly turned to face her. "Where did you come from?!"

"Finished picking flowers," Gust responded plainly. "Progress?"

"Yeah, I picked some." IF sighed. "Sorry, I got distracted... this kid came out of nowhere and..." IF found herself too embarrassed to finish recounting her story.

"Don't worry. Gust knows." With her usual business smile, Gust pulled out her voice recorder. "Captured whole thing. Plan on showing to others."

"Wh-" IF looked at the recorder with shock. "How? That thing only holds eleven seconds!"

"More than enough." Gust pressed the green Play button on the controller and smiled as it replayed its message.

"-hen I decided..." started Red's voice from the recorder, "... that I want you t-"

Gust recoiled in shock as the recorder was suddenly destroyed by a bullet fired from IF's claw, which she equipped with amazing speed and a face indicating towards equally amazing rage.

"... How did you fire bullet from that?" Gust inquired despite her fright.

"I don't know and I don't care." IF retracted her claw and bent down to the bushes again. "Let's get back to picking flowers."

Gust let out a sigh of relief. Even though she was disappointed by her loss of blackmail, she decided to count her blessings and be thankful that IF didn't take the rest of her frustration out on the party's shortest member. "She had intricate clothing," Gust remarked in regards to Red. "Maybe you should have recruited her into party?"

"I'm not like Jacob. I don't recruit random people into my party on a whim, especially not children."

"What about me?" Gust huffed. "Gust is even younger than girl."

"Yeah, well, you're different. I don't know how but you are. In fact..." IF looked at the alchemist beside her, appraising her in agitation. "... You go between first and third person quickly. How old are you, really?"

"Iffy!" Gust seemed to be genuinely offended by that. "It is rude to assume age of a woman like myself!"

IF rubbed her forehead. "Don't call me Iffy."

Finally, the party reunited and made their way inside the inn. Given that the exterior matched that of some of the other buildings, being grey and with a blue roof, the party hardly expected the interior to break away from the medieval aesthetic that Leanbox presented them with thus far and the inn fell right into their expectations. The pale pink walls of the lobby had a lot of framed newspaper articles, each mostly congratulating the establishment for whatever reason, and a teal carpet ran from the door from which the party entered to the dark brown wooden counter that had a waist-high gate on one side. Doors to toilets and some employee only areas were located to the left while stairs leading up to the next floor were located on the right. Two large wooden doors were located to the side of the reception counter and had a sign saying "RESTAURANT" right above it.

Gust was occupied with the dungeon map given to her by Jacob from Yvoire and IF was reading over her shoulder and whispering with the alchemist. Compa would have walked up to the receptionist but Neptune, being as energetic as ever, decided to go up to the counter before she could do anything.

"Hey howdy hey!" Neptune said cheerfully to the receptionist, a silhouetted female with a long ponytail tied up behind the top of her head. "Me and my party need rooms for the night azappity!"

The receptionist didn't seem to be alarmed or surprised by Neptune's suddenness. In fact, she might've been cheerful. Then again, it wouldn't be good for an employee whose job it was to interact with other people to be socially unpleasant. "Certainly. We don't get many parties of adventurers but that's nothing we can't handle. You'll have to get separate rooms, though."

"Believe me, this already sounds much better than the motel we stayed in last," responded Jacob.

The receptionist's smiled may have widened. "Well, then I hope that our establishment can make up for the inconveniences you've experienced. Now, our inn's rooms have either one bed or two. I'm presuming you'll want three rooms of two?"

Neptune thought this over for a few seconds before answering. "I wanna scout out the rooms first. You never know whether a floor's going to drop you into a bottomless pit or not and I wanna test my footing."

The receptionist snerked, covering her mouth and nose with her hand as she did so. "Terribly sorry," she apologised as the party looked at her with bewilderment. "Now then, I'll send someone to show you around." The silhouette walked to the door behind the reception desk and opened it. "Excuse me, we have some guests who are looking to rest here. Can someone show them the rooms?"

"I'll do it!" called a young, feminine voice from the other side of the door. The receptionist moved out of the way to allow in a silhouette that looked exactly like Financier from Lowee. "Hello and welcome to our inn," she greeted as she walked out through the gate next to the reception desk and made her way to the U-shaped stairs. "Please follow me up the stairs and I will show you the rooms we have on offer."

The upper floor of the inn wasn't very decorated, being just a hallway that people were meant to traverse upon leaving their rooms. There were no windows; the only light in the corridor came from the ceiling-hung glass lanterns that amplified the light given off by the candles within them. There were four doors along the left wall and the corridor bent ninety degrees to the right at the end. "There are four rooms here that have a single bed each. There are four more rooms around the corner that have two," the guide explained. "The room at the very end here is currently unused. Let's go inside, shall we?"

The guide opened the door to the room, standing to the side to allow the party to look or step inside without obstruction. Out of all the motel rooms the party had been to thus far, this one was the most tranquil. The light brown wood floor contrasted well with the white walls, on which were two tall green-paned windows that had blue curtains which were tied to the sides to allow the mid-afternoon light to brighten up the room. In the corner of the room was a brown claw pot holding what had to be a small tree. It had a tall yet thin trunk that ended with a thick, messy crown of fresh green ovate leaves. Next to the adjacent wall rested a tall wooden cabinet and a small yet classically-shaped wooden drawer that was a fair ways underneath the wall-mounted lantern. On the middle of the floor rested a red carpet, on which stood a small round wooden table.

"Whoa!" Neptune immediately dashed forward and leapt onto the elegant bed that rested next to the wall between the two windows. It was large enough to hold two people comfortably and it had a thick pink doona, complete with a large dark pink symbol of unknown meaning, that covered the pink mattress and three soft white cushions in front of what seemed to be one long white pillow that rested against the gold rail headboard. "This is a fancy pants room if I ever saw one! Who needs forty winks when you have this?"

"Nep-Nep, you shouldn't jump on beds you haven't paid for," Compa warned patiently.

"Might as well let her," said IF as she sat down on the small red-cushioned seat that was next to the table and began reading the map she took from Gust. "It's good to test a bed before renting it for the night, right?"

Jacob began to rock from side to side. "Damn it, now I need a place to sit down..." he muttered to himself.

The guide could've smiled in humour. "Indeed it is. It's not a problem to us at all but you'd be surprised at how meek some customers can be to not ask such a thing. Now, would you like me to show you the next room?"

"Nah, I wanna stay here," Neptune protested as she nestled into the obviously comfortable bed.

Jacob sighed. "Neptune, get up."

"I don't wanna. It's too cosy here. This bed is destined to give me a whopper of a dream sequence."

"I will pick you up myself and carry you around for the rest of the day if I have to," Jacob sternly warned.

Neptune groaned before forcing herself off the bed. "Fine, whatever," she grumbled.

The next room to be showcased was right around the corner. As the guide opened the door and showed them all in, they were slightly less awed than with the previous room. The walls were a deep pink this time around and the paned windows were equally as tall as the last ones and twice as wide. They also came with thin pink curtains that were tied back at the middle but pulled together at the top, filtering the light coming in somewhat. On the adjacent wall were two framed paintings, the larger one positioned horizontally and the smaller one standing tall, above a wooden drawer that had a opaque lamp standing on top of it. At the corner was another potted plant although it was but a mere short fern that barely held a candle to the small tree in the previous room. Again, there was a red carpet on the wooden floor.

Jacob walked in and sat on one of the beds that was on either side of the drawer. Like the previous room the beds were large enough for the comfortable sleep of two people. Unlike the previous room, however, the beds were covered by a thin pink blanket and the pillows were nowhere near as thick. The headboards this time around were just make of simply cut wood. As Jacob lied down on the bed, he found he didn't particularly care. "It's alright," he said aloud. He then spent a few moments looking around the room before saying "This room feels oddly relaxing."

"Is every bed in this inn made to hold two people?" IF asked the guide incredulously.

"Yes, indeed," the guide admitted proudly.

Neptune walked over to the other bed and flopped onto it. "This bed sucks," she complained immediately. "I want the first room."

IF looked at Compa, holding the map at her side. "Actually, since there's six of us, we could get both rooms and Neptune and someone else sleep in the white room while the rest of us pair up and take one of these beds."

"Oh, you share beds?" asked the guide with mild surprise.

"I am not sharing a bed," Jacob adamantly snapped.

IF sighed. "There goes that plan."

"That's what sleeping bags are for," piped up Gust.

"Fantastic," started Jacob. "You can sleep in one while I sleep in this bed, IF and Compa share the other bed and Neptune and Nisa share the other room."

"I vote for this super duper idea!" shouted Neptune.

"Why should I be forced into sleeping bag?" Gust asked, indignant.

"Because you have experience with those things," Jacob responded.

"Maybe we should discuss sleeping arrangements after we've bought the rooms," IF suggested, tired of the arguing.

"Would you like to follow me down to the main desk to buy now?" the guide asked.

"Why not? Let's go," said Jacob as he hopped off the bed and, with Neptune, followed the party out the door.

Behind the guide that led them back the way they came, IF turned to Gust. "I don't suppose we'll be able to get good prices for this?" she asked quietly.

Gust flashed her usual winning smile. "Leave it to Gust," she answered equally as softly.

During the night, Yvoire and Conversation had met in the Basilicom's prayer room as they previously arranged. The only source of light, coming from the altar, illuminated the room sufficiently but the walls around the light took on a green and yellow hue while every wall beyond the light's touch was a dull grey. The seats and red carpet retained their colour, however. In addition, the stained glass windows that sparkled like gems in the natural light of the sun were a dark blue and purple as if a fog of venomous evil clouded them.

"Thank you again for joining me, Archbishop, despite the time," greeted the Evangelist.

"I am only here because you wished to discuss something urgent," responded Yvoire. "Say what you need to now so that I may retire for the night. What, exactly, is wrong with the boy that came here this afternoon?"

The female silhouette paused for a bit. "To understand my concerns, you must first hear a certain story. Tell me, Archbishop Yvoire... have you ever heard of the Console War?"

Yvoire might have blinked a few times in confusion. "The... Console War? No, I cannot say that I have."

"Very well then, allow me to educate you. An indeterminable amount of time ago, the four CPUs fought against each other in Celestia for supremacy over the world."

"That is surprising..." said Yvoire. "I know the CPUs have clashed before but I had no idea that a war was brewing in Celestia."

Conversation tilted her head back, perhaps looking to the sky with longing. "During the fighting, Overlord Momus appeared and overwhelmed the goddesses, forcing them to flee here, to the world below."

"While I still have difficulty believing in this so-called 'Overlord', for all of the CPUs to descend to their respective landmasses at once is unprecedented."

"You may have heard," continued Lowee's Evangelist, "that Purple Heart, Planeptune's CPU, has not appeared in her landmass."

Yvoire was silent for a moment. "I recall hearing about a shopkeeper in Planeptune who was fired for giving away two very valuable items to someone who claimed to be Purple Heart who, according to the shopkeeper, transformed to prove their claim."

Conversation's head snapped back to Yvoire. "... Could you repeat that?" she requested in disbelief.

"It is a rather odd story, I admit. The Basilicom insists that Purple Heart has yet to return but this woman swears that she was visited by none other than the CPU herself."

"They are at least investigating, right?" Conversation inquired.

"Well, a transforming girl is nothing to disregard so easily, so they are indeed investigating, but the Basilicom still denies that she has returned."

"..." Conversation rubbed her forehead. "There are so many things wrong with that story that I do not even know where to start."

"Speaking of stories," Yvoire said, looking back at Conversation, most likely with a stern glare, "how does Jacob tie into all of this?"

Conversation looked back at Yvoire "The truth of the matter is, that boy is working with Purple Heart. He is a member of her party."

Yvoire was shocked. "Is this true? You are certain?"

"I have met the party personally back in Lowee. You have my word."

Yvoire sighed. "Then what am I to do?"

"Simple." At this point, Conversation's mouth might have twisted into a wicked grin. "Kill Neptune, the one who is Purple Heart. After that, Planeptune will lose its protection and its inhabitants will move to the other landmasses. Like Leanbox and Lowee, for example."

Leanbox's Archbishop seemed wary and hesitant, disbelieving of the words of the Evangelist. She noticed this and sighed. "Come now, Yvoire. Unable to reach Celestia, us powerless humans can do nothing but pray while our goddesses fight in the heavens. Would you not like to change the direction of the Console War directly? To have power for once?"

Finally, Yvoire let out a defeated sigh.

Fun fact: I actually got my brother to help me out with the church in the second paragraph. I was worried for a bit that it was something other than a church but, between me and him, we came to the conclusion that it was a church thanks to the tall door at the front and the circular window on top of it. He thought the spire on top of the tower was a Christian cross but then we decided it was actually a weather vane, thanks to the light shining on it in such a way that I'm not sure actually exists with real weather vanes. So... there's that. Enjoy your pointless trivia. However, keep in mind that I am a stickler for facts. This is why I always lazily double-check everything with Google and Wikipedia (hence how I learned about pantiles).

All aspiring writers, keep this in mind: do your research. I actually learned a while ago about a university assignment in which the writer wrote that their character was in Los Angeles and then they drove to New York. That must have been the fastest car in the gum drumsticks universe because those two cities are on opposite sides of the entire bleating continent. You do not want to write something that ends up like that. Otherwise, you'll end up having important people appear in the middle of a heavily populated area and no one caring and you'll forget all about it until 19 chapters and 14 months later.

... I hate hindsight. How no one else noticed this, I have no idea.

Keep an eye out for Chapter 25: Roots. Or just wait until the notification email appears in your inbox if you're following.