A/N: Thanks once again for the reviews, keep them coming.

Chapter 12: Power

However, my private classes of DADA were not going as well. In all honesty, they were going terribly.

The first time I had that class during our second stay in the trunk was the time I had felt the most powerless in my whole life.

I had walked into that room confidently at the beginning of the class, but not ten minutes had passed before a hex from one of the dummies had sent me flying through the room, landing painfully on my left arm.

"Are you alright lassie?" asked Gryffindor, genuinely concerned, but made no move to come near me, having learnt his lesson about touching me.

"Fine" I hissed, getting up to my feet and experimentally touching my arm. My forearm was extremely painful, but as I flexed my fingers, I concluded that it was not broken. What worried me more was the fact that an Impedimenta hex that I had sent at the dummy had no effect whatsoever. That was simply not possible.

But as the second dummy lurched forward, my Stupefying hex , which was a direct hit mind you, did not work at all. I had to jump to the side to avoid a hex and had the misfortune to land in front of another dummy which shot a ray of bright white light at me, which hit me as if it were a punch to my face, and I hissed in pain as I felt my lip split, blood pooling in my mouth.

"Bombarda maxima!" I hissed, now at a safe distance and watched as the dummy got blown up to pieces. So some hexes worked and some did not. Why?

I tried the same hex and as it worked on another dummy, I was fairly certain of casting it on the third, but this time it had no effect. The blasted thing should have been in pieces, I thought, as I cast a quick protective charm. Why in Merlin's baggiest pant was it still attacking me then?

"Bombarda Maxima!" I hissed, but the spell, once again a direct hit was not effective at all, instead I was the one to get flown across the room, landing painfully on a bench and hitting my side to the hard wooden surface. I yelped as blinding pain appeared in my side, and I could hear the painful crunch as a couple of my ribs got broken.

The pain was such that I could not get to my feet. It paralysed me and all I could do is take a couple of shallow breaths, for taking a deep breath was an excruciating feat.

"We'll call it a day now, what do ya say lassie?" asked Gryffindor and my head immediately snapped to the side.

"No" I hissed, partially from anger, and partially from the excruciating pain that followed my slow and deliberate effort to get to my feet. "Again."

He eyed me warily, and tried to protest :" But lassie, your ribs are broken, you have to have that looked at ya know!"

I raised my wand slowly at him, aiming at his heart. I noticed that I was short of breath, but this was completely irrelevant. I could still hold a wand, I could still form words, that was enough.

"Again!"I snarled and he nodded grimly, knowing what I refused to admit. I could not fight anyone in this condition.

He bewitched another dummy, who lurched forward, and I hissed at it, murderous intent in my words "Incendio!"

This time, the spell worked, but I knew that there was little chance of it working because of anything I had done. It was most likely a fluke.

Another dummy was bewitched as I thought about this problem, and I hissed, with the same intent I had at the previous doll "Stupefy!", and the spell went right through the doll. It didn't even sway in its step. "Petrificus Totalus!" I hissed, but still nothing, and as it raised its wand I hissed once more "Impedimenta!"

Nothing, I thought angrily as my spell was a clear hit once more, but had no effect, and as I could not stop the spell that the dummy had cast in the same time.

I was hit once more, this time being hit in my stomach, and I was sent tumbling to the floor, gasping for breath desperately as my vision got blurred and as the floor seemed to dance before my eyes.

"Rosalind" called Gryffindor, but I was so sick that I could not raise my head in response.

"Rosalind!" called he again and I grasped the wall in front of me, using it to pull myself unsteadily to my feet, feeling like I was about to lose my lunch.

I found the man in front of me, eyeing me with worry and I hissed out "I'm fine" at him, trying to get past him.

"Get Claudia to look at that" spoke he, furrowing his brows at me. I nodded, but I knew that I would do nothing of the sort.

The walk through the trunk proved to be real torture, as I found that every part of my body hurt. I also had the distinctive need to vomit, but I refrained from doing so by breathing as deeply as I could. This, in turn, brought me excruciating pain in my ribs and I staggered to the common room, as it was the closest room I could think off that provided somewhere to lie down.

The last few steps to the crimson couch were the longest and most difficult I had to make in my life. As I finally made it to the velvet surface, I slowly and carefully allowed myself to sit down before pulling my legs up, one excruciating move at the time, and allowing my head to fall to the small pillow that was left at the arm of the couch.

I could not breathe, I could not move. I was completely, and utterly broken. But all I could think of was my magic. Why didn't it work? Was there something wrong with me? I had to find a solution, I had to fix this. I had to.

"Oh Merlin!" I heard a surprised voice say, the only voice that I did not need at that moment.
"I'm fine Melody" I called, or whispered if you prefer, but she ignored me, yelling for Claudia to run over here.

Before I could do much more than open my eyes, Claudia was over me, her wand at hand and ready to start the healing.

"Get away from me!" I hissed at her, raising my wand.

"I have to heal you Rosalind, these are very serious injuries!" insisted she, but still eyed my wand with uncertainty. She knew that I'd hex her if she moved a muscle.

"NO!" I hissed. I did not need healing, I needed to know what was wrong with my magic.

"Let her" came another annoying voice, and I looked to the side, to see that Ravenclaw had walked into the room. "I understand that your pride is hurt, but it is imperative that she has some practice."

I glared at all occupants of the room, at Arielle who voiced her surprise, saying that I looked like a troll had used me as a toy, at Melody who kept eyeing my broken lip, Rowena who looked endlessly understanding and Claudia who was ready to start healing me as I lowered my wand.

I don't remember being healed, but suddenly, there was no more pain. I got to my feet, a little uncertain in my movements, but as the ground was firm beneath them, I raised my wand at a nearby lamp, flicking it and wordlessly sending the lamp crashing to the ground.

I observed my wand with interest.

"Repairo!" I spoke, ignoring the surprised exclamations of my friends.

Once again, the lamp was in one piece, as good as it was before I had broken it. Another flick of my wand and the lamp was back at its place.

So I could perform magic, but not offensive magic.

I turned around at that realisation, walking back to the DADA classroom, deciding to practice more and ignoring all attempts at conversation from the occupants of the room. I did not need to talk, I needed to practice.

But no matter how much I practiced, it was not helping. In the weeks that followed, I made no progress what so ever, only getting beaten time and time again. I could not sleep, I had no appetite, and I could not look my sister in the eye. This was unforgivable, and if I couldn't fight, I was…. Despicable.

I could not fathom it, lying in my bed four weeks later. My eyes travelled slowly to the old grandfather clock. Two in the morning. Must be a full moon, I concluded.

Why could Arielle, Claudia and Melody use their magic to the same efficiency as before, even better, and I could not? Why couldn't I fight anymore, what happened? What changed?

I slowly lowered my feet to the cold stone floor of my room, put on my slippers and took my dressing robe. The fabric was light, but I ignored the goose bumps that appeared on my skin from the cold air.

My feet found their way to my small bathroom and I waved my wand, opening the taps and allowing the hot water to create steam that filled the entire room.

Why could I do this, I wondered, waving my wand and wordlessly closing the taps, and yet I could not stupefy one single doll?

It was so frustrating, I concluded, leaning my head on the edge of the tub and watching without any real interest as the tips of my hair got wet, lumping together and sticking to my shoulders.

But this was not the first time these questions precisely kept me awake at night. And this time, once again, I'd stay up, trying to figure it out. And I knew that I would be met with no success.

Salazar assured me that my magic was "simply extraordinary" as I inquired about the level of my skill today, but I did not believe him in the least. I could cast a killing curse without breaking my stride now, but I could not disarm a doll. How monstrous.

I smirked as this word appeared in my mind. How befitting of my skill. Monstrous, belonging to a monster. What else do you call a person who does not cry? Who has never cried from the age of two, not for sadness, not for pain or despair. Never.

I laughed out loud at that. Perhaps it was for the best, because, for what I wanted to do, to kill those monsters, a monster was surely needed.

The next morning, the Tuesday of the fourth week we were doomed to spend in this trunk, welcomed me with a peculiar piece of news. The classes were cancelled.

"Why ever would they do that?" I asked, taking a sip of my pumpkin juice.

"I don't know, but at the very least we get a break" grinned Arielle at me, ever the morning type.

"Eat your eggs Melody" I remarked as I saw her toying with them, as was often her habit, trying to avoid eating them.

"I don't want to." Spoke she, pushing the plate away from her. I waved my wand in response, pushing the plate back at her. "You can't make me Linds" sighed Melody, eyeing the plate with distaste. "you know I'm not hungry in the morning."

"And you know that you can't skip breakfast, now eat." I spoke, turning to my goblet of pumpkin juice once more.

"But you're not eating either" spoke she, giving me a rebellious glance. Good grief.

"I didn't sleep last night," I spoke and her eyes widened "so this technically isn't my first meal of the day."

"Again?" asked Clo, also showing worry for my mental condition.

"What are you so surprised about?" asked Arielle, albeit with her mouth filled with some mash that I did not want to observe long enough to identify. "She never sleeps when it's a full moon."

"And that's not healthy at all!" exclaimed Claudia, horrified at the prospect. "You need to rest!"

"All that I need," I snapped, annoyed that she was worrying so much over something so trivial, "is to get my offensive abilities back."

"Could it be that you're trying too hard?" asked Clo, seemingly interested in a new topic "you've been practicing every night for three weeks now, maybe that's the problem, maybe you can't force it."

"Maybe" I responded, still focused on the orange liquid in my goblet. She didn't feel it, the power that left my wand , that should have been able to destroy a building, not just a stupid dummy. She did not see it pass the stupid thing without having the least bit of an effect.

I was silent through the walk to the Charms classroom, where we were supposed to meet.

It was pure surprise that pulled me out of my thoughts, for we found the usually tastefully decorated room completely barren, save for four cushions that were left in a circle in the middle of the room.

"What happened here?" asked Arielle, promptly walking to the crimson pillow and plopping down on it, sitting with her legs crossed in front of her.

"We redecorated" came a voice, and I turned to see the four founders entering the room. It was Hufflepuff to have spoken, and she waved her hand, gesturing to the pillows in front of us. "By all means, make yourselves comfortable."

I did as I was told, walking to the silver coloured pillow, clearly intended for me, kneeling on it and sitting back on my legs.

Claudia and Melody had followed the instructions as well, and I was now facing my sister who kept giving me worried glances. Bloody terrific.

"Now, I am sure that you are wondering as to the reason for the cancellation of your classes." Spoke Rowena, and I was glad that it would be her to explain. She would be concise and to the point, and this was all that I had patience for in that moment. "Today, your practice will consist of mediation."

I was not sure if I had heard her correctly, but as my sister voice her surprise, I was sure that this was exactly what was said.

"Mediation, professor?" asked Melody, tilting her head to the side in her surprise.

"Yes." Confirmed Rowena seemingly having anticipated our surprise. "This training will be done with the purpose of assuming control over your magic. Now, it is a common misconception that a witch's or a wizard's magic comes from their wand, but in reality, you are the containers of your own magic, and your wand is merely an instrument used to pull that magic out of you and enable you to control it. If a witch or a wizard can control their magic better, and if that magic is not left unmaintained as it is in most cases, their power would double."

Double? Was that even possible? If I could double my power, maybe the problem I faced now would disappear. Maybe this was the solution I was looking for all these weeks.

I looked up from the pillow, my mood significantly improved. Finally, there was a chance of progress, finally, I could move from this dead end that I had encountered so violently.

"For now, join the tips of your fingers" spoke Rowena, demonstrating the pose that she wanted us to assume.

I did as I was told, looking up from my fingers expectantly, anxiously.

"Close your eye and take a deep breath" spoke she and I allowed my eyes to flutter closed. I did not like closing my eyes in front of all these people, but if it was going to help I was willing to give it a try. "Clear you mind, don't think. Focus on breathing."

Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out.

"Now imagine a circle, fill it completely with a colour, any dark colour." Spoke she , and I imagined a small circle, filled with a dark azure colour. "Imagine yourself reaching in" spoke she and I felt curious tingles in my fingers" and now imagine something reaching out."

As I did this, as I imagined a hand reaching out towards me, a curiously dark hand, I felt the pins in my fingers multiply with speed that completely overwhelmed me, and soon, the small tingling feeling was a painful, roaring sensation, consuming me. It must have been a second after that I suddenly and violently separated my hands in a desperate attempt to escape this burning, and that I swung them apart, reaching widely to the sides.

The sensation was gone, accompanied by a loud sound of glass shattering. There was a sudden wind picking up in the room, and I felt connected to it. It was so violent, its only wish to destroy.

But destroy what? Destroy who?

My eyes snapped open, and I saw that the girls were standing huddled together in front of me, with Helga in front of them. Her eyes were hard, and her wand was drawn, casting an impervious shield before my sisters and my friend.

I blinked at the scene, only to lose the sensation that ruled over my senses and have the wind die down.

Silence reigned across the room for a moment or two, before it was interrupted by the roaring laugh of Godric Gryffindor.

"So that was it!" laughed he merrily, as if this was the best thing that had happened during our stay in the trunk.

I looked about me, seeing that I had broken the enchanted windows, and that the glass that once spread sunshine through the room was now broken, strewn about the room. In its place was only a brick wall. So that's what Helga was protecting them from. From the glass I had broken , for I knew that, one way or the other, this was me.

"What happened?" asked Arielle, looking about the room curiously "Linds, what did you do?"

"She didn't do anything" responded Rowena "or should I say, she couldn't do anything. This happened because your magic is of the explosive kind."

Since all four of us were staring at her, she seemed to understand that this was not a term we had come across during our schooling.

"I don't suppose that this is something widely familiar in your time, or else you would have been taught about it in Hogwarts. Every person has a particular sort of magic. Some have magic that is calm, flowing, some have magic that is wild, untamed, some have magic that is solid, and some, as it is the case with Rosalind, have magic that is explosive. Now, there are no differences in power, that is to say, the difference in power is attributed to nature of the wizard, not the magic. But it is true that some magic types are better suited for some parts of magical work than the others."

"And you are a nature born dueller lassie" grinned Gryffindor at me.

"Indeed" Agreed Rowena, giving Gryffindor a reprimanding glance for interrupting her. "your magic is very suitable for duelling. You will be able to draw immense amounts of magic in a moment's notice and therefore your spells will be amongst the most powerful cast in the battlefield, if not the most powerful, once you learn to control your magic."

"Could this be the reason she was having trouble with duelling?" asked Claudia, her eyes narrowed at me in contemplation, as if she expected the answer to her question to be written out on my face.

"This is precisely the reason." Agreed Rowena, smiling at her student.

"So once I learn to control it" I spoke, but got interrupted by Rowena.
"Channel it" spoke she, "yes, once you learn to channel your magic, you will be able to blast away those dummies without a problem."

I felt relief course through every part of my body, as if some immense weight was removed from my shoulders. For this reason, I put all I had into practicing meditation and soon, Not one dummy could come near me without being blasted from the face of the Earth.

Perhaps it was never more clear in our training that we were preparing for war then on our first DADA class that demanded us working together, all four of us, to destroy the opponents. Simply put, it was a disaster.

Arielle was too reckless, jumping around like a bloody idiot and slashing at everything that moves, so unpredictable that she almost got hexed by us, instead of the dummies she was facing. That is not to say that she was bad at fighting, she was very good, but the fact that I could never tell where she was going to be in the next second was limiting my choices greatly. I knew that, were this to be a real fighting situation, she was equally likely to suffer injury from the enemy as she was to suffer them from us.

Claudia's problem was of a completely different nature. She was simply taking too long. It was clear that she was thinking about every possibility, trying to devise a plan that would have us win with the least amount of danger, and in the same time trying to keep an eye on her every ally, to see if they were in need of help. This left virtually no time for her to react to the enemy's advances, which in turn had me blasting her enemies as well as mine. This would have gotten us killed in a real life duel.

Melody seemed to face a similar predicament, but instead of thinking too much, her problem was hesitation. She was a great dueller, no doubt about it, but she was too kind for the battlefield. She had no intent to hurt her enemy, let alone kill him. But she had to, because they would have every intention to kill her. This is why she chose to stay out of the battle, choosing to let us do all of the hexing. I could understand that, but that was unacceptable.

And lastly, I used too much power. I was getting better and better at controlling my magic, but I had the tendency to lose control, allowing it to slip from my fingers, which almost got Claudia killed at one occasion and me maimed on several. I had good control at the beginning of the practice, but as the enemy's hexes became darker and darker, I tended to lose control of the power that I used to retaliate.

But we were getting better and better with every practice, and by the end of the second month there was a sliver of hope in my heart. Maybe, just maybe, we could make it out of this war alive, at the very least some of us.

The walk through the Hogwarts halls the night of our return was very amusing. People kept throwing us wary glances, whispering and blatantly running out of our way. One of the bolder Gryffindor first years stared at us openly and I responded by smirking at him. He paled visibly, and looked away from me, whispering with his housemate.

"You know, it's only been one day for them" spoke Claudia, looking around with curiosity. "it's only natural that they are confused."
"Let them" grinned Arielle, throwing her hands in the air and stretching as if she was a blasted cat on some tree. But I ignored such behaviour this time for I was in much too good of a mood to let her bother me. I had finally managed to survive a private lesson of DADA without suffering a scratch.

"That's the best part" I agreed.

"We're sitting at the Gryffindor table today" spoke Melody as we reached the gates of the Great Hall, and she led the way to the red and gold table.

We were late as it seemed, and the only four seats available were to the left of the golden trio.

I didn't mind, in fact, I figured that this could be an entertaining dinner.

"Behave Linds" spoke my sister as she noticed that I was smiling.

"Whatever do you mean sister dear?" I asked, giving her a smile "I am always on my best behaviour around the felines".

I could see that she was worried, but really, there was no need for her to worry. I would not cause a spectacle. However, if Ronniekins, Potty or Granger said something insulting, why, I would surely need to defend myself. Any means necessary, I thought, smirking.

I took a seat on the right of Claudia, who happened to be seated right next to the bushy haired Gryffindor. How she could not find a charm to tame that bush of her hair, I simply could not understand.

"Came to throw another show?" came a voice just as we sat down.

I looked up, almost beaming at my sister.

"If you want us to" spoke Arielle, calmly taking a plate of mashed potatoes and taking a good spoonful.

"Why don't you sit at your own table? It's against the school rules for students to sit at tables that do not correspond to their respective houses." Spoke Granger, a slight snarky note to her words.

I could see that Claudia was about to correspond, most likely with some legal stupidity, but I was by far too entertained to stay quiet.

"I don't know how this escaped your notice Granger," I smirked at her, "but we don't care much for the school rules. Perhaps your hair is getting in your eyes, shall I shorten it for you?"

At this I raised my knife, to support my offer. I almost laughed outright at the colours that her face exchanged at my remark, pink out of shame and humiliation, crimson as many of her housemates were now openly staring at us and scarlet as her anger reached its peak.

"Apologise Kersey!" spoke Weasley, taking out his wand.

"Settle down Ronniekins" I spoke, giving him a brilliant smile, showing off all my teeth. "I'm not talking to you."
"Linds" whispered my sister, giving me a reprimanding glance across the table.

"Don't worry sister" I spoke, smiling at her as well, "I do not mean to cause any trouble."

"She's dreadfully sorry to disturb you" spoke my sister, and I just took a portion of the pasta before me. "she didn't mean to insult you".
She flashed them a charming smile and kicked me in the shin under the table.

"No she's not" spoke Potty, eyeing me with such vehemence that I considered the possibility of him belonging to my house instead of the felines. "She meant every word."

"Yes I did Potty " I spoke, smiling down at my dinner "well done."

"Linds, please" whispered Claudia beside me, seemingly anxious about the whole situation. I couldn't understand her, it's not as if I did anything yet.

"I'll behave, yes, yes" I agreed, taking a bite of my dinner. Ah, the golden trio was always so entertaining, I mean, Potty wasn't much of a wizard, but he'd make a wonderful court jester.

We did not communicate for the rest of the dinner, and my sister and Claudia seemed to relax a bit, as we joked amongst ourselves.

"I can't understand why she was sorted into Gryffindor" came an angry whisper from Ronniekins and I knew that Arielle had heard him. I looked up with interest, wondering if she'd react. "when she chooses to be friends with the snake!"

Arielle pretended not to have heard them, most likely deciding that they were not worth the trouble, but I was slightly annoyed, and tonight, I was in too good of a mood to be annoyed.

"Don't think Ronniekins" I spoke, smirking at him "you aren't that good at it."

"Did you say something snake?" asked he, narrowing his eyes at me.

"My, my, how rude" I spoke and then decided to strike a nerve "I do understand that your family does not associate themselves with the more refined social class for a while, but I would think that mommy taught you the very basic manners. Or did she forget them by deciding to live in a swamp?" I finished with a poisonous smile.

Arielle was the first to react after a stunned silence of a couple of seconds "That's enough Linds" spoke she, her tone slightly angry, warning me" you have made your point, now stop."

"You'll pay for that Kersey" yelled Ronniekins, seemingly coming out of shock only then, his face scarlet. He pulled his wand on me, only to have Potty hold him back.

"Calm down Ron!" yelled Granger, joining Potty in his effort to pull Ronniekins away from the table "Umbridge is watching" hissed she as they were dragging him out of the Great Hall, and as they were walking away, she gave me her best death glare. My response was a brilliant smile.

"Was that necessary sis?" asked Melody, most probably getting ready for a rant.

"It was all in good fun sister dear" I spoke " I didn't even pull my wand out. Sleep well."

With that said, I walked out of the great hall, smiling to myself, this indeed was a good day.

"And she turned scarlet!" I concluded, making Astoria giggle in front of me. "I swear that I thought that she was going to try to hex me right then and there!"

"Well, she is the brains of the Golden Trio" spoke Astoria, smiling at me, "she knew better."

"I guess she does possess some degree of intelligence" I agreed, smirking.

"But not as much as you do Rosey" came a voice that instantaneously achieved what the Golden Trio could not, made my palms itch for my wand.

"What in the name of Merlin do you want now Zabini?" I inquired but he completely ignored me, plopping down on the seat beside me, once again sitting so close that I had to scoot to the very edge of the sofa to avoid touching the foul boy.

"Hello Astoria, it is always a pleasure to see you" spoke he , flashing her that obnoxious smile.

"Hello Blaise" giggled she, her eyes quickly darting from me to him. It seems she was immensely entertained by this situation, which earned her a glare from me.

"Since I had such a good day, I'll give you ten seconds to disappear Zabini, or so help me Merlin I will cast the Unforgivables!" I hissed, taking out my wand and once again pointing it at him.

And once more, he seemed completely undisturbed by the threat.

"Has something good happened?" asked he, flashing me a smile.

"Eight seconds Zabini and I do hope it is a matter of life and death." I snapped, honestly counting down.

"But Rosey!" exclaimed he, his hand flying dramatically to his heart. I heard Astoria giggle once more. Thanks Tori. "It's always a matter of life and death when I come to see you!"

"Six seconds. How so?" I demanded, hating the fact that I was intrigued.

"Why Rosey, when I don't see you, I feel like I am suffocating! Were I not to see you, I would most surely die!" spoke he, once more blinding me with the amount of teeth he was showing.

"That's good to know Zabini. Two seconds. If you had a purpose of coming here, I suggest you tell me or go bother someone else." I spoke, really deciding to hide for a day or two. Who knows, maybe he really would die. It's definitely worth a shot.

"But I did have a purpose!" exclaimed he.

I raised my eyebrow in response and he spoke "I came to ask if you had received my present, you did not come to thank me, so I knew it must have gotten lost in the mail."

Only then did I remember the stupid note I had received two months ago, and a poisonous smile once again found its way to my lips.
"Indeed, I have not." I smiled, my wand raising on its own "My apologies Zabini. Let me make it up to you, Affligo!"

The hex was a clear hit, but he ignored the pain that he must have felt in his arm and grinned at me.

"Sweet dreams Roseycheeks!" exclaimed he, winked and sauntered off to Malfoy, who seemed to be in deep conversation with Nott on the other side of the room.

I turned to my still giggling cousin and she promptly stood up, still unable to get a hold of herself.

"Sleep well" giggled she and seemingly unable to hold herself back added "Roseycheeks!"

Merlin help me, were she not smart enough to retreat to her dorm, cousin or no cousin, I would have cast a stinging jinx at her.

I was surrounded by idiots, I decided, also standing up and making my way to my dorm.

Next Saturday happened to be the date of our first Hogsmead trip, and therefore it was apparently out of the question that we went into the trunk to practice. It was quite a predicament, which had me voting in favour of abandoning the Hogsmead trip, for which I was in no mood, and simply attending our training as usual.

According to my sister this was "a ridiculous idea", we "needed some rest" and this was a "perfect opportunity to get my mind of things." Please.

But I was outnumbered, as breakfast in Tuesday welcomed me with the news that the three of them had made plans with none other than the Weasley twins, which they smartly opted to leave me out of. So, as Arielle put it, this was a "done deal" and we "simply had to find a solution to this little problem."

My only remaining hope presented itself in the fact that we would need to make two trips to the trunk this week, and leaving during school hours was simply not an option. Unfortunately for me, Claudia happened to come up with a solution. We would now be leaving for the trunk Wednesday night, and we would be back by 6 Thursday morning. My sister and Arielle found this solution brilliant, while I grew ever more annoyed.

The first half of our stay in the trunk was rather uneventful, with the usual classes and training. We were getting better at working together, and I was beginning to think that these dummies were no adequate challenge for us. My dark arts lessons were now focused on dark protection, with Salazar teaching me counter curses and shields that could repel most dark spells. For large scale battles, he said. Charms as well was a class that I looked forward too, and we were now being taught how to cast charms on ourselves that would make us completely invisible.

But the real surprise was once more presented in the middle of our stay in the trunk, when our usual meditation lesson, which had by then become another part of our curriculum, was started off with a shocking piece of news.

Apparently Rowena figured that we were now advanced enough in our class of Transfiguration to begin our training to become Animagi. Now, I did not fancy becoming an animal any more than any other self-respectful witch would, but I had to admit that there was a certain advantage to being able to walk out in the open without being considered the least bit suspicious.

To start off with, we needed to practice through meditation. The first step to becoming an Animagi was, according to Rowena, learning to let go of everything that tied us to this world in our human form, everything that made us human.

We all seemed to be struggling with this. How do you let go of everything that makes you who you are? How do you allow yourself to drift away? And most importantly, how do you reach back?

I believe that was my worst problem. I was, quite sincerely, and possibly for the first time in a very long while afraid.

I spent my life clinging so desperately to what made me human, clinging so desperately to what saved me from the monster that I could be. If I let go, if I allowed myself to fall, how do I control where I land?

But towards the end of my stay, as we all sat in the common room of the trunk around the hearth of the fire, as Arielle joked around, casting a Patronus and sending it flying towards Gryffindor who dodged reflexively, as my sister threw her head back in laughter, her blonde curls shaking and as Claudia looked up from her book and giggled as she was unable to help herself, I realized that that was never a problem.

For the problem that I faced, how to keep my family safe, was always the solution to the problem of how to stay human. I knew that, were my sister to simply look at me, not even asking, just looking like she needed help, I would take down any monster in my way, including myself.

I knew that, were Arielle in danger, I would go to the ends of Earth to pull her out of it, and then yell at her for being stupid enough to get herself in that situation for at least a month. Were Claudia to get hurt by a boy, I'd rip his bloody skin off.

Because that's what you do for family. And they were my family.

So with this, I let go of all that made me human, and by the end of our third stay in the trunk, I could tell that I was going to take form of a small animal on four legs. The creature had a long snout and a long, rich tail, but seemed rather small in size. Despite this compact size, the animal was elegant and I was pleased with what form I was given, after all, I did not need size, I needed power.