*Light's POV*

-"You're scaring me," L whispered, placing a kiss to my right temple as he held me tightly in his arms. The warmth of his breath made me tip my head back further into him. He shifted beneath me on the love seat we were tangled in. "You know that, right?"

Yes. I knew. L had been good at keeping as calm as he could, but I knew this was killing him inside. Slowly, but surely killing him. And his eyes... they weren't the warm darkness that they had been. They were a whirlpool of inky blackness that no smile could touch.

"I'm sorry," I muttered, the words floating away like smoke through the air that clung in blossoming ice to the windows that surrounded us, the glass the only guard against the storm outside. "It's just a migraine."

I leaned my head against his shoulder, my hand trailing over his cheek and jaw. His arms tightened around me, his hands trailing over my bare chest to stop at my heart. His hand didn't move as if he couldn't feel the beats and eventually one of his hands moved to my neck searching for my pulse.

His lips pressed into the skin of my shoulder as he kissed every inch of me he could in a slow motion, his fingers still searching for the rhythmic tempo that my heart was supposed to be making.

"I think it's worse. Brain tumor, epilepsy, swelling..." He trailed off, kissing up my neck. "I don't want to lose you."

I closed my eyes again, a sigh tumbling from my lips. "You won't."

There was a roar in the distance that was a low rumble that rattled the glass of the windows. I sat up a little fuller at the sound. "What was that?"

L's arms wrapped around my waist tightly, trying to hold me in place. "Do you promise?" I could feel L's unsteady heartbeat in the air around me tensely. "You promise not to leave me?"

"I promise. What's-" My words were hidden underneath the rumble of thunder, rolling over us, shaking dust down from the cracked was a distant sound of breaking glass and I was reminded heavily of an earthquake.

And then the pain hit. My muscles locked and my breath was stolen from my lungs before everything faded away-

"– all right. I know you're confused, but they're trying to help you. I promise."

"L," I swallowed, the taste of blood in my mouth. My tongue felt sore and my mouth filled with more blood that I spit out and onto whatever surface I was on. It was jerky and made it so my head pounded. But my head was competing for recognition with my muscles that were aching and exhausted. It felt like I had just run for three days straight. Everything hurt, from the large muscles in my thighs to the small ribbons between my ribs, clenching and throbbing as I began to shiver.

"There you are," L's voice said again.

I gave a small cry as a long wailing scream filled the air and whatever I was on began to rattle with movement. I forced my eyes to open and through the blurriness, I could make out metal framing with a man in uniform beside me. A hand was placed on my shoulder and I glanced up at L, whose face was worse for wear.

His eyes were bloodshot and the rings under them were darker than normal. They looked like they might never fade away. He wore a small smile, but I couldn't place it. And his hair was somehow worse and stood up more.

"You need to let the paramedic go now," L continued, his voice soft even though I could hear an underlying of something else much more emotional.

I blinked, my eyes dropping down to where my hand was, wrapped tightly around the wrist of a young woman. She didn't look too alarmed and gave me a smile when I finally released my hold on her, a bruise in place of my aching hand. She gave a small wave when I opened my mouth to apologize and went about her work.

"What..." I pressed a hand to my head and closed my eyes with a deep breath. But I didn't have an answer. My memory was blank. The last thing I could recall was laying in bed, trying to sleep. "What happened?"

"A convulsive fit. You passed out and experienced violent muscle spasms. If you're aching, that's why," the male medic replied as he wrapped a pad around my arm to take my blood pressure.

I gasped as a sharp pain entered the back of my hand and I looked over to see the woman pressing a needle into my arm to start an IV. I rested my head back and licked my lips. Ok. Seizure. That's what it was.

"If I have another seizure, is that really the best idea?" I questioned, trying to wiggle my fingers as they fell asleep on my other hand.

"It's standard," the woman's voice said to me. "Your body needs electrolytes and fluids during recovery. It's better if you rip out the IV than you not getting what you need."

Once my hand was free I moved it over my head, trying to reach out for L who took my hand and began to rub soothing circles into it. I tried to go back into my head, but I couldn't catagorise the overstimulation I was feeling.

"My head feels funny," I grumbled, disappointed that that was the only thing I could come up with. There were small laughs around me and L gave my hand a gentle squeeze.

"What you experienced just now was like shutting down. Everything but your most automatic functions go, and when you wake up again it's like you're coming back online from the bottom up," the woman explained again, a kind smile on her face as she worked on setting up the IV drip. "The convulsion lasted three and a half minutes, Basic consciousness was gained at about six minutes, and awareness returned after eleven minutes."

"Your mind switched on without you," L supplied, his thumb still making circles over my hand. "Fight or flight and muscle movement."

I shook my head, letting my eyes flutter shut as my stomach twisted into anxious knots. I could hear the paramedics talking in hushed voices so as not to let me hear whatever it could be.

The ambulance came to a stop and I was pulled from the back of it, L's hand leaving mine. A nervousness flooded through me and I tried to sit up so I could see where L had gone. Someone grabbed my shoulders and held me down and my hands began to tremble.

"L-L!" I called, still trying to see behind me. Hospitals made me uneasy to begin with, but the fact that I had no recollection as to what got me here in the first place made it worse.

"It's ok," his voice said from somewhere behind me. "I'm coming."

I was pushed through the doors and eventually into an empty room where I was hooked up to more machines. L had taken a seat in a chair that was far enough away from the bed not to be in the way, but close enough that I was a little more comfortable with where I was and what was happening.

"What do you remember?" L questioned, tiredness etched on his face. I could feel myself frown as he reached up and rubbed at his eyes and the back of his neck.

"Not much."

"It started when you were asleep. Could you tell?"

My eyebrows furrowed as I thought back trying to get anything. Anything at all. But nothing came up. I shook my head and sighed, resting back. "I don't have anything."

And it was terrifying. There was a numbness in my leg, a metallic tang in my mouth and butterflies in my stomach before I was yanked from myself. Seizure.

In those brief, fleeting moments when they had played a role in a crime scene – poisoning often presented with convulsions – I imagined the horror of the mind being aware while the transport was lost in a hurricane of conflicting impulses. I had pictured myself awake and thinking behind a wall of physical turmoil, able to sense the world but incapable of interacting with it.

I had never been more wrong in my life.

It was like I had been switched off. Like a computer whose battery had died. I was just gone.

In a moment I could feel my spine stretch as my muscles contorted, a cry forced its way up my throat, and could see L jump to his feet before everything went dark. The next thing I knew I was laying on my side in my hospital bed, hands clutching painfully tight to the thin fabric of the hospital blanket and there was a warm hand on my shoulder.

My face was being cleaned at the nose and mouth area and In the window I could see my reflection. I had blood dripping from my nose and out of the corners of my mouth. And another person was trying to unclench my fists.

My heart was going to beat free of my chest with a morse code of distress and my breath was ragged and burned as it came past my dry lips. My hands trembled and my muscles couldn't seem to relax no matter how hard I tried to will them. They stayed tense and adrenaline filled. I shut my eyes tightly, not wanting to open them again.

"The convolution lasted two minutes," a voice said somewhere behind me. English. Why was the voice speaking English? How did I understand English?

"I'd rather he didn't have a second one," another, deeper voice replied. "We should get him a CT scan and replace the IV. He pulled it out."

A hand began to touch my head and I did my best to move away from the foreignness of it, but my neck wouldn't obey me and screamed when I tried to move it. There was something wrong. I was in a hospital, I knew that, but why? Who had brought me here? What were they going to do to me?

The knowledge of the definition of a CT Scan alluded me and it just made fear sink further into my bones. I tried to move away from the hands that kept touching me, prodding at me, but each time I tried, my body tried to snap, break into a million pieces.

"Light," came a different voice, in Japanese this time. "It's going to be ok. You had another seizure."

"S-Stop!" I shouted, my mouth moving on it's own. "Don't touch me!"

"Light, everything is alright," the same voice said again.

"How do you know my name?"

Had I lost my sense of reality? All of this felt so similar. The voice, the rushed movements around me, the taste of blood, the smell of antiseptic. Something was yelling at me. I had been here before. I knew where I was.

And it slammed back with a mace striking against my cranium. I gasped for air and my eyes opened, searching around the room I was in for that familiar face. That one person who had been with me through all of it. The beginning to now.

"L," I said, licking my lips, the taste of salt over powering.

"I'm right here. It's ok." The hand on my head brushed back my damp hair gently.

I swallowed and could feel my shoulders finally relaxing. "Another one?" I asked, lifting an aching hand to my face and rubbing at my tired eyes. I lowered my hand and it was immediately snatched up by L's comforting grasp as geometric shapes were traced against my skin. "I remember waking up, but I..." I inhaled sharply as another pain entered my arm. I opened my eyes slightly and could see a nurse drawing blood. "I didn't know where I was."

"That's not impractical," L answered me, his fingers trembling against mine.

"Was this one the same?" I turned my head away from the nurse who was leaving the room with the others to where L sat in a ball on his chair, worry creased into the lines on his face.

"It was shorter. Not a sign of improvement, but we're hopeful," L continued, trying to hold a confidence in his voice, though I could see through it. "I'm hopeful."

"Are you going to help me escape back home, or will I have to do that myself?" I did my best to tease with as much of a smile as I could make my face produce when I noticed the room was empty. L looked up from where he had been looking at my hand. His laugh was weak, but it was better than a web of worry.

"You're joking, right?" L questioned.

I did my best to widen my smile. "CT scans, MRI's, blood tests. I'll be here for weeks."

"I will be here with you through all of it. I don't care that I'm not family." His smile was larger now, kind and exhausted. "They are going to have a hell of a time kicking me out of here."

I chuckled, which quickly turned into a cough. I settled back down, my eyes closing from the destruction wrought by the migraine and seizures. "We could change that." I could feel the energy in the room shift from concerned to confused. I forced my eyes to open through the want of sleep and could see L looking at me intently with his eyebrows furrowed. "I have no idea what the hell is going to happen to me, and before I find out, I want you."

"Light, we're in a hospital," L muttered, eyes wearily watching the door in case someone came in.

I lowered my voice. "Lawliet." His eyes flickered down to me. "I want to marry you right here, right now." The black of his eyes brightened slightly with surprise and his thumb stopped it's soothing movements over my skin.

"I think you need the CT Scan now." The words stung a bit, but I couldn't hold it against him.

I took a deep breath and gave his hand a squeeze. "Call my sister. You promised her, after all. And then find someone to marry us. The moment Sayu gets here, I want to be your husband. Do you understand me?"

"I-I- But..." L was at a loss for words. I had never seen him so flustered and the more he stuttered the redder his cheeks became. His eyes met mine and he stopped. There was a thick silence between us before a gin spread across his lips, banishing the fatigue. "You're serious?"

"Dead serious," I replied, my eyes sliding closed again as sleep started to slip over me.

"I will call your sister." I could feel his fingers push through my hair. "Light." The voice was soft and broke through the haze of sleep. "They're going to take you to get an MRI done and later when the machine is open, a CT scan, ok?"

I opened my eyes and looked up at L who had a gentle smile and was caressing my cheek with his hand. It took me a moment to process what he was saying, but I gave him a nod as it became clear.

"I also called your sister. She is on the next flight over."

"Ok." I tried to sit up, but L's hand took my shoulder.

"It's ok. Just relax."

I can't say I enjoyed the next hour of time. I hated heights with a passion, but I had never considered claustrophobia to be another fear. The machine was large, but for such a big machine, the place where I had to lay was the size of a coffin. And even with the headphones that played calming Brahms over them, did nothing to drown out the grinding sound the machine made.

I did my best to keep my eyes closed, but it didn't seem to help. All that made it so I could breathe normally was imagining that L's hand was in mine. And maybe it was, because the next time I came to, I was back in my room with L asleep in his chair, his hand holding to mine.

I sighed and used my free hand to rub my eyes, wishing the sound of the beeping would go away.

"You're awake?" L yawned and shifted in his chair, stretching, but never releasing my grip. "You've been doing well. They said your MRI would be in a few more hours. And your sister should be here soon."

"Have you slept at all?" I asked, searching for the button that would allow me to sit up.

"Not since we got here. I've been too worried. If it happens again, I can help you before the nurses get here. I need to be awake for that."

I frowned at the words. Guilt was sharp in my chest. I shouldn't have done this to him. I should have gone to the hospital in the first place, when he wanted me to. I must have caused him so much grief. How could I fix this?

"You've been asleep almost eight hours," L continued kindly. "You look better though. Not as pale. Hydration has probably helped."

I sat up and sighed. "I'm so sorry."

L's head tipped to the side curiously. "What for? You didn't do anything wrong."

"I don't know exactly, but I feel like I owe you an apology. I've probably kept you from working on important things, like the Kira case. And I have no sense of time, but I'm sure you haven't slept in at least two days." I was rambling now, but I didn't feel like I could stop. "And when was the last time you ate? And I must have scared you horribly and-"

I broke off as he got up and moved closer to the bed, leaning over me. My eyes widened as he kissed me. We were in public. In a hospital. It wasn't exactly private. A nurse or doctor could walk in here anytime they wanted. I had never had L kiss me in a place where other people could see.

He pulled back and placed a kiss to my head. "You are far more important to me than any case I have." My eyes searched his, looking for something that would prove his words wrong, but all I found was a tired sincerness. "How are you feeling?" He stepped back from me, but kept his grip on my hand, as if I would slip away if he let go.

"My head still hurts, but it's better than it was." I closed my eyes and sighed.

"I can tell. You're neck is still tense."

I rolled my eyes with a small smile and a huff in answer. I could feel a pull on my hand as L went to sit back in his chair. I frowned and opened my eyes. "You still haven't slept."

L gave a confused look, scrunching up his nose. "As discussed." I gave an expectant look and he sighed. "The chair will be fine."

"The chair is making your back hurt and your shoulders ache. I can see how stiff you are." I did my best to give him a half smile. "You need a bed and I need you. Get in."

L blinked blankly for a moment as if he didn't understand what I was saying. He took one step closer, but stopped. I knew what he was thinking. A nurse was more than likely to get upset if they found us curled up in the same bed. And what if I did have another seizure? I could possibly hurt the both of us and he would be in the way of the doctors trying to work on me.

L dropped my hand and motioned for me to move over. I did my best, wincing at the change. L propped himself up where I had previously been and lied down beside me. But the bed was small, only ever meant for one, and even though both of us were on either edge of the mattress, we were chest to chest, face to face.

L's arm wrapped around me and pulled me close as he hid his face in my neck, relaxing down into my shoulder. His fingers were against my bare back as he found the opening of my hospital gown and dipped beneath it. I could feel his grip on me losen, and his breath deepen.

"You should try to sleep too," he whispered, his lips tickling my skin as they brushed against me.

"I will later," I said softly, stroking his back. I could feel the want of an argument, but none came. Instead, L stayed silent as he fell asleep. HIs breathing was steady enough to help me pass the time. I wasn't sure how long had passed, maybe an hour or two, when there was a knock at the door. I did my best to glance over my shoulder to the open doorway without waking L. There was a nurse with a disapproving look and next to her was my sister who looked like she hadn't slept once since she was called, but was bubbly and bouncy all the same.

She smiled and stepped into the room, holding two bags, one larger than the other. The nurse clicked her tongue before leaving the doorway. Sayu came over the the bedside and rested a hand on my shoulder, giving it a squeeze.

"How are you feeling?" she asked softly, when she saw L beside me.

"I'm doing alright. How did you get here?" I glanced behind her for an answer, but I didn't see anyone else.

"Watari gave me some notes written in English to give to people when I got here. He sends his best. He couldn't get away since there was a large attack from Kira before I left."

"There was?" I demanded, shifting slightly to get a better look at her.

"Yeah. A bunch of school kids that went on strike today died." Sayu set the bags down and moved closer to the bed. A small smile played on her lips as she looked over L who had nuzzled down into my chest at the movement.

"I'm glad you're safe." I pulled one of my hands from L's back and held it out to her so she could take it.

"Same here." Sayu tipped her head to the side. "I didn't think your wedding would be in a hospital room."

"I didn't think I'd have a wedding," I admitted. "But I can't stand not being married to this man anymore."

Sayu gave a smile. "That's a bit cheesy."

"You'll understand someday." I gave her hand a squeeze.

She shook her head and wrinkled her nose. "I've done that. I'd rather marry my computer. Boys are so immature and girls cause too much drama."

I gave a teasing smile. "GIrls, huh?"

"I've been around. You have no place to judge," she shot back. I sighed and looked down at L who was sleeping soundly still. "Alright," she said rather loudly while clapping her hands once. L jumped in my arms and his eyes shot open. At the sight of my sister he groaned and hid his face deep into my neck. "Ryuzaki. Get up. The judge should be here in about 30 minutes, and Watari made sure that at least one of you would look presentable. Up."

"No," L grumbled, his grip around me tightening. I couldn't help but laugh as Sayu moved around to the other side of the bed and took his arm and began to pull at him. "Ok, ok. Don't rip my arm from its socket, please." L sighed and glanced up at me with an annoyed look. I bit my lip to hide my smile and he grinned. "I love you," he whispered, giving me a kiss before sitting up and leaving his side of the bed cold.

Sayu snatched up his hand and one of the bags before pulling him in the direction of the bathroom. The wait felt longer than it probably was and soon the judge had arrived and greeted me. We spoke in awkward small talk. He seemed nice enough. MIddle aged, loved god and spoke all sorts of things about politics. I just nodded to in agreement, though I didn't necessarily believe it.

And there was so much that we hadn't thought about. Like, his name. When the judge asked, it took me a moment to come up with an answer. I wasn't sure if L wanted to use his name and I still had no idea what his last name was, or if Lawliet was his last name. He had never mention the second name and I had never pushed him on it. Even in the death note that had taken his life, there wasn't another name. Just Lawliet.

"Rue Ryuzaki," I finally settled on. That would be the best for everyone. And it was the only name that Sayu knew.

There was the sound of a door opening and Sayu stepped out in a long red dress with her hair all curled and pulled back. She smiled and moved over to the bed, holding out a black tie to me. I rolled my eyes and sighed before taking it and putting it around my neck and tying it.

"You've been planning this, haven't you?" I questioned.

"Ever since L called me, yes," was her reply. "It doesn't take that long to tie your shoe!" Sayu called, turning back to the bathroom door. "Will you hurry up?!"

I chuckled and glanced to the judge who wore a kind smile, but I knew he didn't understand what was being said. Sayu tapped her foot impatiently before finally going to the bathroom and walking in. I glanced down at myself and rolled my eyes. I looked like a complete idiot in my hospital gown and a tie.

There were footsteps and grumbled disagreements, but Sayu reappeared, L in tow. She stopped and released L, who straightened his suit. His hands slid down the lapels before he looked up at me and I couldn't help but smile.

Sure, I had seen him in a tux before, but it was so rare and Sayu or Watari had made sure that this suit was somehow a step above the rest. I wasn't sure if it was the fit or the almost black shade of blue it was or the fact that I was going to marry him, but something about it was superior than the other times.

Though the lines under his eyes were still extremely dark, they did nothing to hold back the shine of his irises. And I wasn't sure how Sayu did it, but somehow she got his hair to lay a little flatter than it normally would.

"Ok. Two things before we start!" Sayu said, moving to the other bag, her heels clicking as she went. "First, write your vows down so that I can read them. I'm assuming it'll all be I English." She turned back with a notebook and a pencil.

My mind went blank at the thought. Vows. What the hell was I going to say?

Sayu gave L the notebook and he began to scribble in it. She then took the page and tore it out before giving me the book and pencil. I started at the page for a moment before giving her a rough outline of my ideas.

"And I need a picture!"

I rolled my eyes, but L came over and stood by my side, taking my hand. My breath was stolen from me. This was so real. This was happening.

Sayu took a few pictures on her phone before standing off to the side with a bright smile.

"We ready?" the judge questioned, rising to his feet.

L gave my hand a squeeze and I exhaled deeply. There was no going back now.

"You're about to be chained to me forever," L muttered. "Are you sure you want to do this? We can stop."

I shook my head. "I want this."

It was simple enough. Nice. Quite. Small. It wasn't what I thought it would be at all, but I couldn't imagine a better time or place to do this.

"The rings," the judge asked and a awkward smile came to my face.

We didn't have rings.

But I caught L's sideways smirk as he turned to Sayu who held out her hand, which L took what was placed there. he then took one and set it in my open palm. A simple silver band with a single inset diamond.

"Light," the judge said, nodding his head for me to move forward.

I took a deep breath and smiled, doing my best to sit up a bit more in my bed. I looked up at L's face who was waiting patiently.

"From the moment our paths crossed, you have surprised me, distracted me, captivated me and challenged me in a way that no human being ever has," I started, causing a blush to come to L's cheeks. I glanced down at his hand in mine and put the ring slowly on his finger. "But you also made me love you. And with that love comes my promise. I promise to uplift you. And support you in your work as well as challenge and frustrate you and maybe someday I will even let you win at a game chess."

L gave a small laugh and pulled one of his hands from mine and I looked up to see him using his fingers to wipe a tear from his cheek.

"But no matter what we encounter, I will stick through it with you just as you have stuck with me. I love you with every beat of my heart."

L laughed again and behind him, Sayu was smiling widely, papers in hand. L took a shaky inhale and nodded before speaking.

"I always thought it would difficult to find someone who would love me when I'm always scattered in a million different directions." He took the second ring and slid it onto my finger, the metal warm from the heat of his hand.

"I felt like a puzzle that was missing pieces. But you have showed me I don't need at the pieces to create something beautiful and that love can exist in the most imperfect, lost and broken people. And I promise you that our life will be beautiful, whether we are in a thousand pieces or one."

It took a lot to hold back my own tears. And this moment, this amazing moment of pure ecstatic joy is one I don't think I would ever be able to express beyond that. It was a warm blanket of absolute bliss and I didn't want it to end.

But it needed to end. And it ended in a kiss. One that made the world disappear so that it was only us. No hospital, no onlookers, no stupid hospital gowns. Just us. And that was special. Absolutely breathtaking.

When the kiss ended, I could hear the giggle of Sayu as well as the click from her phone as she snapped pictures. But I didn't care.

I now had the rest of my life with this man. I wa never going to spend it with anyone else, but this just made the bond that much stronger.

Once everything was fully taken care of and Sayu had gotten all of her pictures, L left to change.

I tested back in my bed after passing the tie back to Sayu. I hadn't realized how exhausted I was. I might have fallen asleep because the next thing I recalled was a hand taking my cheek and lips kissing mine deeply.

"Boys, save it for another time," Sayu's voice teased through the haze. "Or I'll record that and make some money off of it."

I shot her a wide eyes look, but she only smiled, letting her hair down.

L's fingers pulled my face back to look at his and I smiled, receiving another kiss.

"Can I join you?" he asked softly. I moved over to allow L onto the small frame and then cuddled into his chest. It was warm and smelled like home. "Get some sleep. You need it. You'll be up in a few hours for that CT scan."

I nodded with a yawn and snuggled down into the chest of my husband.