It was easily the most uncomfortable meal Cloud had ever had.

The food was freaking amazing though, which was pretty much the only positive thing. Angeal and Sephiroth had made the dinner, and the presentation was much better than anything Cloud had ever witnessed in the Infantry cafeteria, so it sort of blew him away.

Despite aching to meet and know these men before he got to the military, Cloud would have been fine with never meeting them ever after what he'd done with Zack. He was uncharacteristically quiet, trying not to draw attention to himself, but worried he was coming off as rude. Negative.

The three powerful SOLDIERs kept trading each other looks that Cloud just barely caught, clearly sizing him up. Negative.

Zack kept trying to drag him into the conversation, and Cloud would stammer bland one-word answers. His usually cheerful smile was growing strained. Negative. Zack should never be unhappy.

Thankfully—or maybe not—Angeal Hewley eventually asked him a direct question, forcing him to participate in the conversation.

"Do you like the food, Cloud?"

The blond froze with his fork halfway to his mouth and looked across the table at him, shocked. Had he forgotten to praise the food as soon as he'd taken his first bite? "Oh, gods—" he blurted, tripping over his words, "Yessir. It's really great. Sorry I forgot to say so. Seriously, it's—I just eat cafeteria food, so—thank you for making this, Sirs."

Angeal smiled at him, and that smile did not mock Cloud's word-vomit or his obvious nervousness. "I'm glad to hear it. And please, we're off duty, and meeting as friends. There is no need to be formal."

Cloud nodded, blushing at his misstep. He took another bite of chicken, never pausing his nodding, although now it was encouragingly, and smiled hesitantly at the First. Look how much I love it, he tried to convey.

Genesis snorted quietly and Cloud's eyes cut to him. From everything he'd heard about the man he'd been expecting him to be a bit of a bully, but that didn't mean he wasn't slightly hurt. He was trying, dammit.

"Genesis," Angeal murmured, very quietly, his voice reproachful.

Sephiroth asked him the next question. He was sitting to Cloud's right, on the same side as Genesis, and across from Zack. The Silver General had been Cloud's idol for many years; he had vivid memories of sitting on the floor in front of his TV after school, watching news reports that flashed this very man's face as they discussed Wutai. Thus far he had been even quieter than Cloud had, and Cloud was unsure if he was surprised or not. Zack told him quite a bit about these three—Cloud knew that Sephiroth had trouble with his interpersonal interactions, and thus far the man had been content to watch him curiously whenever he thought Cloud wasn't looking (or maybe he did know that Cloud occasionally caught him, and just didn't care). "Are you enjoying your time at ShinRa?"

"Yeah. It's different from what I expected, but in a good way. I'm glad I joined."

"Different how?" Zack seemed happy to chime in. The familiarity of his voice relaxed Cloud, and he thought as he twirled some noodles around his fork.

"Um… I guess I was expecting to be a nobody, you know? Like, as a grunt in the infantry I'm not that important, but I still feel like an integral part of a team, and like I'm…my own person, I guess? Like I still have an identity here, and I'm not just 'Trooper 25061.' And I like that a lot." He hesitated, and glanced up at the others. "Does that make sense?"

Angeal smiled too, just as encouraging as Zack. It was clear he knew how stressed Cloud was, and aimed to make it better. "It does. If you join SOLDIER you're allowed to…hm, personalize yourself even more. I mean, look at these two." He inclined his head towards Genesis and Sephiroth. "They're fairly distinct. You're allowed more liberties the higher you rise in the ranks."

"If you don't mind me asking, how come you two wear the regulation uniforms on duty?" He glanced curiously at Angeal and Zack.

Angeal hummed. "I suppose I'm not a flashy person. I never felt the need to get my own dramatic coat."

"Hey," Genesis protested, pointing at Angeal with his fork. "We don't wear them to be dramatic."

"Yes you two do," Zack countered, chuckling. "And I guess I haven't really thought about it. I haven't been a First for that long either. And most of the stuff I do is modeled after Angeal anyway…" he grabbed Angeal's hand and kissed his knuckles like a prince. ""Cause I love ya so much."

"You would look good in a coat like ours, Zack," Genesis murmured, tilting his head. "Though red is not your color. Perhaps another black?"

"I'm not much of a coat guy."

"But they're so versatile." Genesis's voice dipped into a purr. "Now I'm thinking you should wear one… nothing underneath. Lazard will surely approve."

Cloud burst out laughing at the ridiculous image and covered his mouth as he continued to giggle at the stupid look on Zack's face. He gave Genesis a helpless, apologetic look when the man turned to him.

"Yeah, and stupefy the enemy with the powers of my stunning ass," Zack joked. "Drop the coat, they drop their weapons. It's perfect."

"Zack," Cloud said, getting his attention and focusing on just him for a moment. "You should switch over to clothes like the Warrior of Light's."

The Warrior of Light was Zack's character of choice in a fighting game the two of them frequently played. He could wear a variety of outfits, but one was extremely skimpy (and was the one Zack put him in all of the time, naturally). Zack laughed. "Are you kidding? That's probably worse than just the coat. I'd be so concerned about keeping my junk under control that I wouldn't be able to fight."

"I dunno, it works for him."

"That's because he's a video game character, Spike. Or did you forget that again? I know about your crush on that one guy."

"You shut up," Cloud countered. He raised a finger. "I don't, and I tell you that every time we play. I pick him every time because his finishing move is the best."

"Because he's the character for cheaters who can't actually play."

Cloud leant in, his jaw tight with mock-rage, and growled deep in his throat. "Take that back."

Zack leant in too, his brows furrowed in hate. They glared at each other for a long moment, and then the SOLDIER gently pushed his shoulder.

Cloud returned to his original position, cracking a happy smile. He took another bite of chicken before jerking his head up, suddenly remembering that they had an audience. One that had been analyzing his every movement all evening, no less.

Sure enough, all three were watching him thoughtfully, and Zack, too. His friend was rubbing the back of his neck, the gesture he always did when he was self-conscious.

Aw, shit, Cloud groaned inwardly.

"S-So, uh," he hazarded, "How did you guys all meet?"

The actual story was a treat. Angeal and Genesis lived in the same town and were best friends growing up. They met Sephiroth after joining ShinRa. Angeal, as Cloud already knew, was Zack's mentor for a time before he was added to the threesome. He wanted to ask about the romantic stuff, how they got to a functional, adoring, supportive four-way relationship, but he supposed it wasn't polite conversation during the first meeting.

Later, then, because he was curious as hell.

The rest of the meal passed relatively peacefully. Cloud managed to duck out of the conversation again, merely watching as the four interacted. It was fascinating, actually. It was a bit shameful to admit, even to himself, but Cloud's mind had been full of twisted, warped ideas of what their relationship was all about.

Sure, Zack told him an awful lot about it. Zack described his boyfriends as loving, tender, and funny. They had some small fights that Zack occasionally confided in him about when he was upset but things were good overall. Still, when Cloud thought about the foursome he couldn't help but conjure savage images of the four of them fucking—as if that's all it was, as if any group of three or more was necessarily all about sex.

Actually, other than the kiss Zack gave Angeal's hand, he only saw a couple other things of note. Genesis gave Sephiroth a peck on the cheek when the Silver General brought him a glass of wine once they relocated to the living room. Angeal and Sephiroth sat on the couch beside each other with their thighs touching and occasionally played with each other's fingers, but that was it. They may have been toning it down because he was there, which he appreciated, because being a third—fifth?—wheel always sucked, but he hated to think he was inconveniencing the group. They'd done so much for him already.

Despite the chasteness of the evening, once they had all relocated with beers or wine to the next room Genesis asked him something that was anything but.

"So Cloud," the redhead asked, turning to the blond who was sitting alone on one side of the room in a squishy leather chair, "How was your first time, hm?"

"Gen," said at least two voices at once. The SOLDIER just shrugged, and his gaze did not leave Cloud's as he continued, "We heard the story from Zack's end. I'm just curious. Surely you don't mind putting us at ease? We're hoping he was good to you."

This was some kind of test, he knew it. Zack looked annoyed but was not fighting Genesis on it, shrugging apologetically at Cloud from across the room. The loose grip around the bottle of Cloud's beer tightened and he took a sip from it, pretending to be thinking.

It took a moment, but Cloud eventually lifted his head to meet Genesis's probing stare head-on.

If this was a test then Cloud Strife would pass. This was hardly about him; his actions reflected on Zack too. He had to prove that his best friend had made a good choice—that Cloud himself was worthy of the time and effort Zack had put in.

"It was amazing," he said truthfully. "I was nervous but Zack did everything he could to make it easy for me. I think that if I hadn't had Zack around I would have done something I regretted with someone I regretted, so… I can't express how grateful I am to him." He glanced at Sephiroth and Angeal too, his head high even though he wanted to retreat into the kitchen and hide. He'd asked a stranger from one of his classes straight-out if he wanted to fuck him; he could do this. "Thank you, Sirs, for trusting the both of us. It was the best experience."

Rather embarrassed, he glanced at Zack and rubbed the back of his own neck, something he'd unconsciously picked up from his friend. "And thanks again to you too, Zack…"

Gaia, there it was. The discussion of he and Zack having sex.

In a way it was better having it out there. Worrying about it—the real reason he was here—all evening had been exhausting. Genesis put him at ease, surprisingly. "You are welcome," he told him, "It is good to know that Zack was able to help you, and that you enjoyed yourself. He's very good at the 'calming' thing, isn't he?"

Cloud nodded vigorously, amazed that Genesis was trying to be friendly now, establishing some common ground. "He really is," he readily agreed. "We joked the whole time. It was such a relief."

Sephiroth was still squinting at him with those too-bright green eyes, his expression unreadable. God, he was so damn handsome, distressingly so; Cloud's eyes skipped right over him to Angeal. "His jokes were really bad, though," he added, and watched as Angeal's eyebrows rose.

"How so?"

Zack started to say "Heeey!" but Cloud continued on, speaking over him. He had the attention of the dazzling SOLDIER Trio; that was power, and Cloud's spine straightened. Rather than bending under the weight of it he pushed back—Cloud had come into some power of his own recently, so this was not so strange.

This was happening, but Cloud could handle it.

"Well, he said he had a First Class Dick."

Zack covered his face with his hands, and Genesis gave an exaggerated gasp of delight. "You didn't."

"I was trying to make him laugh, okay? At least I'm not an 'unstoppable se—"

Cloud was out of his seat before he realized it, and pressed his palm over Zack's mouth in the middle of the word 'fuckdemon.' "Shut up!" he ordered, panicked, and laughed as Zack struggled. The SOLDIER licked his palm and Cloud blanched, letting go to wipe his hand on his jeans. They then continued to wrestle, grappling at each other.

"I mean, if it's honesty hour here—"

"You're gonna embarrass me in front of my COs!"

"They don't care, do you, boys?"

Zack unceremoniously flipped Cloud over his lap to end their fight and the infantryman crashed down onto the carpet on his back. He peered upside-down (and slightly dizzily) at the three famous SOLDIERs. He knew they had been watching that little exchange, and had heard his embarrassment comment, but that was half the fun. If Zack wasn't here Cloud doubted he'd be this brave, or as willing to be silly.

"No," Genesis said easily, though he looked perplexed. "So you two were both ridiculous with each other, okay. I can imagine. Anything else of note?"

Cloud rolled over and sat cross-legged on the carpet. Zack was saying, "Uhhhh" loudly and the blond tuned him out as he surveyed the other three, the three he had to impress. He wondered how much Zack had told them. Sex was a private thing, generally. Normally Cloud would have been irritated if he had found out Zack had told some strangers the details about their incredibly intimate moment.

The way Zack had nestled up against him from behind and kissed his neck, the ease of the laughter they shared, and the specific nature of that incredibly transformative, meaningful experience Cloud had would remain private to him and Zack. However, from the beginning that experience had never been solely theirs. The three men in front of him knew about it before Cloud had, and had given Zack their permission to sleep with him before they even really knew Cloud. Zack was right—they had indeed placed a lot of faith in Cloud.

There was no way to know how much Zack had dished, but Cloud wanted to say something that the man probably hadn't, so he could contribute. He would rise to this challenge. "I came way too early the second time, which was embarrassing." Shrugging at the looks of surprise at his admission from his superiors, he added, "But Zack said it was a learning experience, and didn't make me feel bad. He's a great friend."

"Alright, alright," Zack interrupted, waving his hands. "I'm right here, ya know. Yeah, Spike and I had a lot of fun. If you want more details ask me later, because Cloud's red enough to combust, I think. Leave the poor kid alone."

They did not ask him again about the loss of his virginity and Cloud was immensely grateful yet slightly disappointed, for whatever reason. He sort of wanted to talk more about it. He hoped that the other three knew just how freaking good Zack was, how his touch had the power to vaporize worries. How his laugh made anxiety just melt away.

They probably did know that, and more besides. Their relationship was romantic in addition to sexual, and was deeper than Cloud's friendship with Zack ever could be. The sudden, unexplained jealousy in his heart was silly.

Instead they chatted about work and military life and inane celebrity things no one but Genesis and Zack really knew much about. It was pleasant, though, it really was—despite his awkwardness and nerves Cloud tried to involve himself in their conversation as much as possible, because he liked them. Zack had himself three wonderful guys, it was plain.

Cloud left feeling much better than he had upon arriving, and received a text from Zack while riding the elevator back to his floor.

Hey! Thanks for coming over buddy! Sorry if any of that was rough on you… you did good though. They like you. Seriously do. You're a trouper, trooper! : - )

He must have leveled up, because instead of a sweaty, pimpled infantryman with their hand down his pants it was a handsome SOLDIER Second.

"Fuck, you're gorgeous," the man growled into his ear. Cloud went pink. Other than Zack saying that he was a 'sexy kid' and that he had a cute butt, no one had said anything like that to him before. He lifted his arms around his CO's neck in response and hugged him; the man responded by sliding his free hand under Cloud's thigh and picked him up. He pressed the blond against the wall and continued to jerk him off with his other hand.

Cloud felt absolutely filthy with his pants and boots on the floor near his old desk and the rest of his infantry uniform too-hot and scratchy against his oversensitive body, but in the most delicious way. He sighed into the other's ear. "Ugh. Lieutenant…"

The SOLDIER kissed his mouth, and broke away after a tantalizing few moments. "Shit. Call me Damon, Cloud."

The blond nodded. Old habits die hard, though, and he accidentally called his old instructor by his rank a few more times before he finally managed to remember his name as the man laid him out on the desk at the front of the classroom and stretched him wide around his hot, heavy cock.

"Oh, Strife!" Lieutenant Damon Klarke had called to him in the hallway an hour previous. Cloud had been on his way to his dorm after eating dinner so he could change and hit the gym, and almost hadn't heard him. He stopped though, saluting on instinct, and looked around to find his old Survival instructor jogging over from down the hall.

"Sir," Cloud greeted, rather confused. The class he'd had with this man ended two months ago; he hadn't interacted with him once since getting the results from his final exam.

"At ease. How've you been, Strife?"

"Um. Good, Sir. What about you?"

"Great. You in a rush to get anywhere?"

"Not really, Sir."

"I have some stuff still sitting in my desk of yours that I graded but couldn't hand back to you. You missed a few days on injury last semester, I think?"

Cloud nodded. "Kind of, I got a respiratory infection. They eventually Cured me but it took a few days."

"You want to come pick it up? Every time I open one of the drawers I see it, but I keep forgetting to find you and drop it off."

It was weird being in a classroom after-hours, and especially so with his old teacher. All the memories of this class came back. They'd learned about what to do when stranded alone out in various terrains, studied edible plants, and once had a buffet of all of ShinRa's disgusting survival rations. The class had been boring for Cloud, who spent a lot of his time as a kid alone exploring the Nibel mountains, but it was fun. For their final they'd all been dropped by chopper into a forest outside Mideel and had to make their way to a certain spot after four days. By luck Cloud had run into two other classmates and they'd gotten through together—or he'd gotten them through it, rather. It had been his easiest class of the semester, and most of his time had been spent doing homework for other courses during class or idly watching one of his peers who had the biggest crush on their instructor.

Klarke was tall, had warm brown skin that he'd always been attracted to, since everyone in Nibelheim was as pale as he was, and Cloud had always thought that the man was rather similar to Zack. Maybe it was the dorky smile, or the accent—though Damon's thicker one indicated Corel, and Zack's Gongaga—or the way they talked. Cloud had liked him at any rate, even if he was a real asshole about late assignments and being on time.

He'd gotten his tests back, they chatted about Cloud's new semester and a mission the Lieutenant had recently been on, and gradually Cloud had become aware of how intimate their location was. There was no fear of getting walked in on by someone coming in to use the room because the owner already here, and leaning in closer with each passing minute, and murmuring about how Cloud had been one of his favorite students.

Now he had Cloud's legs over his shoulders and was fucking him deep and slow, like he didn't want it to end. "You have no idea," he panted, "How much you distracted me in class."

"What?" Cloud asked, his eyes widening, and not from the wave of pleasure that hit him as Klarke started fisting his erection again. The way his hand wrapped around him was just like the way Zack had done it, and the thought made him dizzy. "Really?"

"Fuck, yes. I always imagined… taking you on my desk, just like this."

Cloud moaned, more at the thought than anything else. Fuck, that was hot. He hadn't even realized the man thought anything special of him at all, and told his ex-instructor so.

The SOLDIER growled to him all the things he'd wanted to do to him in his old seat, elsewhere in the classroom, or in the tents they'd stayed in for some of their field exercises. When Cloud came he was almost in disbelief.

They made out for a while afterwards, the SOLDIER still bent over the desk with Cloud's legs wrapped around his waist. Gentle hands ran over his hips and Damon asked, "You wanna do this again sometime?"

"Sure," Cloud responded, still surprised.

They cleaned up, got dressed and Cloud left, walking dazed back to his room. That had been… exceedingly bizarre. Cloud wasn't sure when he had graduated from rushed encounters with his infantry buddies to his fucking teacher who thought he was gorgeous, but… there you were.

To his absolute horror he ran into two of Zack's boyfriends on the way there.

Hewley and Rhapsodos were each carrying a box full of papers, it looked like, and despite Cloud's attempt to blend in with the crowd they spotted him. Or, rather, Genesis did; their eyes met and Cloud slunk over, knowing it would get back to Zack if he had ignored them.

"Sirs," he greeted, saluting, and prayed his scarf was positioned right.

They always looked so effortlessly good. At Zack's place the four SOLDIERs had been dressed casually, but here they were in uniform. The coat Genesis had talked about really was dramatic; he seemed like a villain from a movie, fiery and intimidating. By contrast Angeal grinned at him, kind and quiet like the main hero, and like the other times Cloud had witnessed it, it coaxed out a smile of his own.

"At ease," Hewley told him. "How's your evening?"

"It's, um—" Cloud fumbled his words. "It's good, thank you. Ah, yours?"

Cloud figured he probably could have handled a conversation with these two under normal circumstances. Their first meeting had been awkward at first, yeah, and Genesis had been hostile for a few minutes (or maybe they all had, and Genesis had been the one who hid it worst). By the end of the evening however he had started to relax. He liked them, he really did, and would have hazarded that they liked him too. It was plain now that Zack had created for himself a wonderful, cozy little family, and Cloud wouldn't worry any longer.

But now he reeked of a random SOLDIER's cologne and sweaty sex. He'd had a dick up his ass not twenty minutes ago and his lips were probably bruised. Odds were the other two couldn't tell anything was amiss but the thought that they could, or that they would think worse of him made him anxious.

If someone was going to shame him for having casual sex that was their problem, not his, and if Hewley and Rhapsodos were the type to do that then he shouldn't have cared about what they thought because they were dicks. Why did he care, then, if they noticed that he'd just been fucking his superior?

"Tiring," Genesis sighed, and flicked his bangs out of his face with a shake of his head. "It's SOLDIER review season. Are you considering trying out for the program?"

"SOLDIER? Yessir. Eventually. I didn't make the cut when I first joined up, which is why I'm in the infantry. I want to try again in the winter."

"Good for you. We'll keep an eye out for you then."

"See you soon, probably," Angeal said kindly over his shoulder as they started back on their way.

"Ah—do you need any help carrying anything?"

Genesis shook his head, but smiled fondly at him. Cloud had offered entirely out of politeness, and it seemed the redhead approved nonetheless. "We've got it, but thanks. See you around, sweetheart."

The blond watched them until they turned a corner, his heart fluttering at the flirty wink Genesis had tossed him before turning away, and hurried back to his dorm.

"That was too close," he muttered to himself.

Nothing bad had happened, but he couldn't shake the irrational fear. What if the two of them had walked in on him and his old instructor? They wouldn't, but what if they had? Casually fucking a superior not in private quarters (or maybe at all) had to be against some rule somewhere. He had a friend or two that was dating a SOLDIER, yeah, but did it matter if you were in a relationship with one versus just hooking up? He was trying to forge a tentative friendship with the famous SOLDIER trio for Zack's sake and it sucked to think that he could endanger that.

Too close, too close.

"Cloud," greeted Moya, one of the boys in his morning drills class, as Cloud entered the infantry wing of the tower. He pressed close and said lowly, "Hey, so none of my bunkmates are in right now, if you wanted to come over again?"

"Uh, sorry," Cloud answered, surprised at himself, "But I'm tired. I've got to shower and go to bed."

"Aw, sure?"

"Yeah."

He found his bunk without issue and grabbed his stuff. When changing near his locker in the showers a familiar figure sidled over to him and gently punched his shoulder.

"Andrew."

"Yo, Cloud. How you been?"

His friend clearly wondered the same question Moya had. The two of them had finally fucked just a day or two before in this very locker room, late at night when they would have gotten in trouble if they'd been caught. They had not, but what if they had? How much would that have jeopardized his chances of trying out for SOLDIER in the winter, that Angeal Hewley and Genesis Rhapsodos were now looking forward to?

Cloud hadn't even thought about any of that, and now the worries made him feel sick.

"Sorry man," he sighed, "I really just want to go bed. Nothing personal."

"Oh. Yeah, of course."

Cloud's no was a far cry more self-assured than his no the one time, when he'd texted Zack over that boy's shoulder. He'd turned down enough guys and a girl or two in the month he'd been sexually active to not feel so intimidated by it any more.

Later he lay on his bed and debated sending Zack a text. His friend always knew what to do… but something held him back. If he was going to confess to being frightened of the new power he wielded then he had to be sure.

His PHS lit up with a message from someone he hardly remembered, a hookup from last week. You got another hour in your Tuesday schedule for me?

Cloud scowled, shut off the device, dropped it on floor and pushed it under his bed. His lower spine still gently ached and he eventually found a comfortable position. When he and Zack had spent the night together his friend had held him the whole night, and bathed him in the warm light of a hundred happy, sated smiles. There was no one to hold him now, and his bed stayed cold the entire night.

Thank you once more to everyone for being so kind and wonderful. Many of you have given me, in reviews and PMs, some awesome ideas that might pop up later in the fic - I'm so grateful for all the analysis and enthusiasm. Thanks!