Prompt: I love all your fanfics and you are probably my favourite writer at the moment! I was wondering if (from the late episodes) you'd be will to attempt a kabby fic for me? After Abby has taken the pill and Marcus has to get to help her get the AI out?

You requested Kabby and I delivered but I'm afraid it sucks a lot haha! I chose to place this in a hypothetical post-season where everything is settled.

I have another piece featuring Marcus and O for tomorrow that probably sucks too. Well… I did my best! Enjoy!

Jumbled Memories

Everything was jumbled.

Jake…

The Ark…

Clarke…

Marcus…

Being Chancellor…

Everything was jumbled, her mind in shatters. The only clear part was her childhood and, even then, she was certain some pieces were either missing or out of order.

The memories were there, she knew they were, but they were like tendrils of mist… Reach for them and they were gone.

The chip had been gone for days now. Pike was dead, Jaha gone, the Grounders under her daughter's control, the camp back in order… The chip had been gone for days and everyone else who had been to the City of Light was recovering quickly and easily. Abby wasn't. Abby hadn't taken the chip willingly in the first place, consent had to be overridden – it was different for her and she was still struggling to remember things.

She was struggling to remember she was on the ground because the ground was forever linked to pain, dead friends and betrayal. She was struggling to remember Pike was dead because Pike had brought nothing but death and horror in Arkadia and her life. She was struggling to remember the Grounders were under Clarke's control because she was always worried about Clarke, always felt guilty about what she had done to Jake, always too aware of the spark of resentment in her daughter's eyes when she thought she wasn't looking. She was struggling to remember the camp was back in order because she often forgot the man who was now running Arkadia.

"Abby?"

She looked up from the data she had been reading and blinked at the man standing in the war room's doorway. He was a stranger. For a fleeting terrifying moment, he was a stranger.

"Marcus." she greeted.

It was hesitant, almost a question.

His lips stretched into a warm smile and he stepped inside, closing the door behind him. "It only took you ten seconds today. We're getting there."

She smiled too, if only to reassure him.

Everyone was worried about her. Clarke radioed from Polis, Raven hovered around because she felt guilty, Jackson kept saying he was sorry, other people crowded her with good wishes…

She liked being with Marcus.

Marcus never pressured her, he didn't ask her again and again if she felt alright, if her head was better, if she was angry or sad or confused… He treated her like she was still the same and for that she was grateful.

The memories weren't gone. They were simply jumbled.

She watched as he went around the room in a well-rehearsed dance: he picked up a mug to get himself some tea from the kettle in the corner, grabbed a handful of reports and a notepad, snatched a pen from the desk and at last sat down on the other end of the couch. Close enough that she could feel his body heat, not close enough that they were touching.

They had taken away Pike's things and re-colonized the war room with their stuff. She was fairly certain they had. Sometimes after Marcus had come back. Marcus who was sitting next to her, feeling both like a stranger and her closest friend in the world.

She dropped the tablet on her lap, forgetting the data to study him instead. There was a crease on his brow as he read the first report, taking a sip of tea from time to time. He was sporting a beard but she thought it had been trimmed. It had been wild before. She remembered it had hitched when he…

"We kissed."

He looked up at her, calm and composed. Patient. "Yes."

How long had he been waiting for her to remember this little piece of trivia?

She looked deeper, forced herself through the automatic fear of pain when she dug in her jumbled memories, grabbed the misty tendrils with both hands and willed them not to fail her this time, not to disappear. She willed herself to remember what she wanted to remember.

"I love you."

It was a shot in the dark but the second the words were out of her mouth, she knew she meant them.

Salvation comes at a price.

I was afraid I wouldn't see you again.

I had those fears myself.

I am not leaving you here.

No matter who wears the pin we're in this together.

I can't do this again.

Please don't make this harder than it already is.

May we meet again.

We will.

"I hope so." Marcus chuckled, his face soft. "But I don't know for sure so I can't confirm that for you."

"I do." she frowned, reaching out to retrace his features with her fingers. She hated that he still felt like a stranger. She hated this dichotomy in her. She didn't know who he was yet she knew only him. The paradox would probably kill her before long. "God, Marcus… I do."

Laughter bubbled in her chest and she didn't make any attempt at keeping it in. She didn't remember the last time she had laughed – before the whole thing with Jaha and Pike started probably. She laughed until she was breathless, only spurred on by the way he was watching her, half-amused and half-worried. She shifted to sit sideways on the couch, her knees on his thigh, framing his face in her hands and tugging him closer until their foreheads rested against each other.

It was the first time since the chip was removed something was so clear.

Maybe if she could have seen Clarke… But Clarke had hurried back to Polis without stopping in Arkadia first.

"I do." she said again.

"I miss you." he whispered, his breath rolling on her lips and she was tempted, for a second, to close the gap and be done with it. She didn't. She feared they would get carried away. She feared she would wake tomorrow morning in his bed, look at him and panic because she didn't know who he was and she knew it would hurt him.

He missed her present tense, she couldn't help but notice, because she wasn't completely there yet.

"I will find my way back to you." she promised.

"I know." he smiled, tentatively brushing his fingers through her hair. "Abby Griffin is too stubborn to give up. That's why I love you."

She smiled back, more determined than ever to fight this.