A/N: For those of you who didn't hear, I recently got to share my story with the Anna and Elsa of California Adventure, right across from Disneyland! It was a surreal experience to tell them about my story and where they could find it and I could not stop smiling. On with the show!
Chapter Thirty-One
Strike for Love and Strike for Fear
Allowyn watched, helpless and frantic as Helen carefully examined Hans and listened to Elsa's explanation. Respectful of the doctor's profession, she kept her distance, but she could still hear Hans' breathing, labored and haggard, each exhale accompanied by an unwanted little shudder at the end. Only when Helen stood to her feet did she rush to the doctor's side, breaking away from her husband's steadying hand. She could tell, simply by the resigned look on Helen's face, that the prospects were far from positive. She blinked back tears in her eyes, keeping her gaze away from her son. "Tell me. Please, tell me the truth"
Helen had never lied to her friend before, but she had also never been tempted so greatly. "I'm a doctor of physical ailments. There's only so much I can do for him, even after hearing an explanation from the queen." She nodded to Elsa, and turned once more to observe Hans. "I can't heal sicknesses brought on from magic, Allowyn… I wouldn't even know where to start. All I can do is try to make him comfortable and pray that healing comes from another source… all I can do is suggest ideas to offer some hope."
"Please." George murmured, putting his hands on his wife's shoulders, the best comfort he could manage. "Please… he's our son."
"I know." Helen pursed her lips in deep thought. "We must keep him warm, as warm as possible. If what Queen Elsa says is true, then his condition will continually worsen until the curse on his heart is broken. If we go by what we already know happens with a frozen heart, we know we should be able to keep mark on its progress with the change of his hair color… he already has a white streak."
Allowyn knelt by her son, tousling her fingers through the strands of cool, white hair so different from his normal, rich coloring. Everything seemed so inconsequential now that her son's life was in danger. "I love him more than I can say… isn't that enough to break any curse?"
Elsa, who had assisted the doctor as fervently as she could with advice and explanations, bit the inside of her lip hard so the physical pain she felt might outweigh the sorrow she felt for Allowyn. "No." She bowed her head. "I… I only know what Anna told me… I know what she did for me. Words alone… just to say you love someone, it's not the same. It's an act of true love that thaws a frozen heart, something someone does to put someone else's needs before themselves. We just have to find the act… before it's too late."
Allowyn squeezed Hans' hand tightly once, bending down to his ear. "I love you, mine alskling. You will pull through this. You'll be fine." She exhaled steadily, and trembling, turned away to face another cot in the room, taking steps that were weighted and slow. They were starkly different from her normal strides, the way she normally floated across the floor, sinking once more to her knees. "Tell me… tell me about Harald now. Will he be alright?"
"The ice did not strike his heart, from what I understand," Helen remarked, making eye contact with Elsa and waiting for a nod before continuing. "I'm afraid all I can tell by my preliminary examination is that the wound only seems to present on his right arm. The flesh is barely alive, frostbitten. Until he wakes, I won't be able to diagnose him any further," she murmured.
Allowyn brought Harald's healthy hand to her lips, cradling it as she bestowed a gentle kiss on his knuckles. "Be strong, my love."
Suddenly, only moments after she finished speaking, Harald's green eyes shot open, his body spasming once as he gasped aloud and wrenched his bedsheets in a vice grip.
"Harald!" Allowyn exclaimed, drawing the attention of the others, who quickly congregated with her. "Sh, it's alright, you're safe now." She firmly pushed his shoulders down to encourage his rest, doing her best to calm him. Salty tears began to flow down her cheeks unbidden, her voice cracking in an effort to keep strong. "Everything's alright, just calm down."
Harald's chest rose and fell in staccato as he oriented himself, eyes flitting from his mother to his father, the doctor, and finally resting on Elsa. "What happened?" he whispered, his furrowed brow clear evidence he was struggling to sort out where his memories began and ended.
"I froze your hand to Hans'," Elsa explained, the guilt causing her words to come slower, as if she had trouble of her own pronouncing them. "He's here, in bed… he hasn't woken up yet… I had to send my magic through his heart to reach you."
"How are you feeling?" George asked, obvious concern edging in his voice.
Harald's eyebrows furrowed as he tried to find the right word. "Numb." He shifted a little, moving to pull his blankets up to adjust them, stopping short. "My arm." His gaze affixed on his right arm, and his stare harrowed as he looked at it. "It won't move. My arm, it… it won't move."
"Pardon me," Helen gently prodded as she slipped between the hovering king and queen, opening her medical bag and sifting through its contents. She removed a small needle she used for stitching emergencies and took the man's pale, icy fingers in her own, noting with silent interest the calluses on his hand from his life of sword handling and training. "Can you feel this?" she asked, bending them gently at the joints, back and forth.
Harald shook his head, watching her method with subtle horror building behind his glassy green eyes. "No…" he whispered, his jaw visibly tightening.
"And this?" Helen proceeded, giving his index finger a poke with her needle hard enough to draw a drop of blood. The man didn't move, his finger streaking with a thin red line as the drop slid away.
Harald's lips parted, his teeth clamping together as he shook his head again.
Allowyn forced herself to remain standing at his bedside wearing a thin smile of masked optimism on her face, thinking back to times long ago when her sons would come to her crying over a fall or a scratch. Often what they needed far more than a bandage was a comforting presence, an assurance that if their mother was there, and gave them a magic kiss, then there was hope. Even today, it would have been easy to convince a bystander she believed all would be well, that her sons would be alright and the effects were only temporary… if only it were as easy to convince herself.
"Now?" Helen asked, putting pressure on his wrist, bending it, then his forearm.
Harald's expresson of growing fear began to shift into something much uglier, self-pity sparking in his eyes. Though they looked wet with tears, he withheld them, violently wagging his head from side to side. "No, no, there's nothing! I can't feel anything!" He jerked his body away from the doctor, who held her arms still in mid-air, needle poised between two of her fingers.
"We haven't finished the testing, yet… you may still have use of your arm if you maintained control over even the smallest part of the muscle… it may take months before we determine the extent of the damage to your underlying tissue."
"Spare me!" Harald spat, turning his face away from his crowd of visitors. "I know what happens to people with frostbite. I've watched men lose their legs, their fingers, their toes to it."
"We might not have to amputate if you would only let me finish my examination," Helen insisted. "But the longer we wait, the more the muscles will deteriorate and the greater the chance we'll have to take drastic measures. Do you want to lose your arm? It doesn't have to be like this, if you would only cooperate. You won't be any less of a man for losing an arm trying to save your brother, you stubborn-" She broke off, composing herself before continuing, doing her best to remember her medical oaths of empathy. "You're already more than a hero in our eyes."
"Go away," Harald seethed, in a tone so icy it made a chill run down Elsa's back.
Go away, Anna.
How easy it would be to turn away now and leave him to wallow in his own pity. She stared for a few silent moments at the man in bed, feeling sympathy churn the bitter taste of guilt in her stomach. I will not let him shut himself away like this. And I won't ignore him like I did Anna all those years. "Harald."
The man reacted to her voice, though it was so subtle she could hardly tell. He shifted, just enough to show he was listening, his back still turned to her.
"You can't do this. You can't shut everything out, believe me, I've tried it for most of my life. Please… please don't give up. I'm sorry for what happened, but we have more important things to worry about right now. We have to help Hans. We need you. Hans needs you." She didn't know what he could do, or if Harald being awake would even make a difference at all for Hans, but if she could convince him to believe he was needed, maybe it would be enough to give him hope.
He turned to look at her, his vacant eyes staring vaguely in her direction. There was a sadness in his gaze she couldn't read, a tell of secret sorrow. For a moment, she battled with the idea of prodding that secret into the light, but a ragged exhale from Hans drew her attention to the present. She glanced behind her and back at Harald, pleading silently with him. As if merely hearing his brother's breathing caused him physical pain, Harald shivered, drew his blanket up to his shoulder, and whispered in a voice more ghost than man. "No, he doesn't."
#
"I'm so sorry," Elsa whispered to Hans. Across the room, the atmosphere had turned eerily quiet as the doctor debated in hushed tones with the king and queen over the best course of action for Harald, when the deadline would be for performing the amputation regardless and what signs they had to watch for to indicate the loss of life in his arm. Harald had fallen back into a deep sleep not long after their conversation had fallen short, and Elsa had shifted priorities to Hans in the meantime. She hesitantly reached over to brush his cheek with her fingers. He might as well have been dead, from how cold he felt. Oh, God, please, no. He couldn't die. "I just… I wish I thought of something else."
"Not your fault." The reply came as a gurgling croak from his throat, his eyes weakly flickering open. "I told you to."
"Hans," she heaved gratefully, taking his hand in hers and holding it close to her breast, her eyes watering with thanks. "You're alive, thank God, you're alive. Oh, oh, your parents-"
"Don't," he interrupted, grunting. "Please, don't, not yet."
He seemed to be stressing so hard to get the words out she couldn't help but nod weakly. "Alright, alright, I won't call them yet. But why not?"
"Because… I want to remember being with you like this. Not scared."
She folded her hands over his, still holding it close. "You won't die. Anna didn't. You won't. We just have to think." She'd never had the chance to see Anna's steady decline, only been able to hear about it afterward and see the end result. A sudden screening of Hans frozen solid flashed into her mind and she shook her head to clear it. "You need to rest now, Hans… rest and talk to your parents, to the doctor. Every second counts." She rose to her feet, starting towards his parents once more.
"Wait, Elsa." His hand grasped her arm, but it shook as if the simple motion was a strain for him.
"What is it?" she soothed, kneeling back beside his bed.
"Harald?" His eyes were so worried, so fervently searching her for answers, she couldn't help but squeeze his hand again, even if she wasn't sure he could feel it at all.
"He's…" She wanted to be truthful with him, but she couldn't tell him all of it, not as it happened. "He's alive. He's alive, and I think he's worried about you. We'll tell him you're awake, as soon as we can. For now, I just need you to focus on staying warm. Wrap those blankets tight around you and try to get some rest. Can you do that for me?"
Hans smiled weakly and bobbed his head in a single nod. "Elsa?" he managed with a sigh, his voice fading as quickly as his strength.
"Yes?" she prompted, helping pull his blankets up further on him, leaning her ear close to his mouth.
"Tell my brothers… I'm alright. Especially… Heins. He worries… too much." As he finished speaking, he sank down against the pillow, his eyes closing, body suddenly collapsing into a round of wild shivering. Elsa watched, goosebumps rippling on her arms as the roots of a strand of his brown hair drained away, leaving only a pale, ghastly white.
Elsa was almost glad to leave Hans with his parents, because it was growing impossible to hold back the tears. She wiped the wetness away from the corners of her eyes, rehearsing how she would greet his brothers and which ones she might seek out first as she closed the door to the inner part of the infirmary. She had no idea where they would all be, but if she could only find one or two, maybe they would help relay the message. After making her way through the waiting room, she pulled on the doorknob leading to the hallway and uttered a little shriek of surprise as the door caved inward and bodies piled up on one another with a series of grunts and exclamations.
Heins grinned up at Elsa from a mishmash of his brothers. "Sorry! We didn't mean to scare you, Elsa. We were only trying to hear what was going on inside through the door!"
"You're… you're all here," Elsa breathed, blinking in surprise, scanning the sea of familial faces.
"You're stepping on my hand!" exclaimed someone from the back.
"I hit my head on something," remarked one of the twins, rubbing his temples as he shimmied out of the back.
"Yeah, and I think it was my head," replied the other.
"Get your ponytail out of my face, please," grunted Heinrik from near the bottom, batting Heins' hair away.
"Better his ponytail than your butt!" exclaimed Johan, groaning and offering Heinrik a hand as all the brothers finally staggered to their feet, Helena at the back of the pack.
"I told you it was a bad idea to lean against the door like that," she scolded softly, crossing her arms. "Men…"
"I know, I know, I'm sorry Helena, but I couldn't think of any other way to learn! So tell me, please! How is he? Is he badly hurt? What happened?" Heins gasped, clasping his hands.
Elsa gathered her strength and beckoned the mass of men inside the waiting room, where they could be more comfortable. Once they were all settled inside and watching her, she began her announcement. "Hans and Harald have both regained consciousness. They are weak, but they are alive. Doctor Helen is with them now, and I'm sure she's doing the best she can to nurse them back to health." But it won't be enough. They need more than she can give them. Hans needs an act of true love, and Harald… he seems to have given up.
"But what happened to them?" Elsa singled out the voice as Harken, and she was surprised to hear the concern coming from him. He stared expectantly at her, and she wondered if she didn't see a flicker of suspicion in his eyes.
Her lip quivered as she tried to explain, but she realized, no matter how she tried to twist the truth, her icy powers would have to be revealed to the entire family. It's all my fault. I froze his heart. "I… I…" she stammered and choked on the words as her tongue seemed to swell in her mouth.
A light hand touched her shoulder, and she looked up at Heins, who smiled and took her into his arms for a reassuring warm hug comforting enough to prompt her to return it. "It's okay," he whispered, patting her back gently. "You don't have to be scared now… just tell the truth. You know what I do when I have to say something that's hard for me to say?"
Elsa shook her head, her eyes closed to keep the tears at bay. When she opened them, she could feel tiny beads of ice at the corners of her eyes.
"I just take a deep, deep breath and say it all at once."
Elsa pursed her lips, preparing herself by taking a few practice breaths in and out. She sucked in a long, slow breath through her nose and held it until her chest felt tight. Fear is my enemy. Don't be afraid. "I was watching Harald visit Kris' gravesite. He told me about Kris, about her memorial." As she spoke, she could see a few faces pique with interest, most notably Hugo and Harken. "I saw some flowers there I wanted to pick for her memorial, but I got too close to the edge of the cliff and I slipped." Helena gasped, lifting both hands to her mouth as Elsa continued. "I was desperate for a hold on the rocks, but Harald grabbed me. He couldn't hang on, and he finally fell himself. We were trapped, and he was about to fall, when Hans came. He saved both of us by giving each of us one of his hands, but he couldn't support our weights. I…" Her heart pounded recklessly in her chest. "I froze his hands to ours, and in order to get to Harald's hand, I had to freeze Hans' heart."
Silence reigned in the room, a silence so thick and heavy it smothered those present until Harken spoke. "What do you mean by, you froze his hands… his heart?"
Elsa let her head bow slightly. "Ever since I can remember, I've had a connection to ice and snow. I can't always control it, especially if my emotions get in the way, but I've learned that no matter what happens, I can't let it control me. If my magic strikes someone… usually they can recover… unless it strikes their heart. If it strikes their heart, and it's not removed… they freeze… to solid ice."
The energy in the room quickly shifted from shock into hysteria. The brothers fidgeted, some more than others and then, in a flurry of words, questions, and exclamations, everyone began to talk at once. Heinrik slipped out in front of the group of his brothers and held up his hands. "Alright, alright, everyone calm down! Now is not the time to panic."
"Now is the perfect time to panic!" Johan hissed into his ear. "Your brother is freezing into solid ice!"
"Heinrik is right!" Heins exclaimed, moving to join his brother in the middle of the group. He turned to look at Elsa. "You said… if it's not removed… then… that means it can be removed, right?"
"Yes, that's right," Elsa said, nodding once, hesitant to give them false hopes. "It can be removed."
"Well, how?" Heins urged, calming as Helena put a hand on his shoulder. "Please tell us. I'll- we'll do anything, we swear."
"A frozen heart can only be thawed by an act of true love," Elsa murmured, placing her hands over her heart. "My sister… she sacrificed herself to save me from… from a threat to my life once. She had been struck by my ice, and… and her love for me was able to heal her."
"An act of true love…" Heins mused, rubbing his chin with a finger and staring up at the ceiling. "What counts as an act of true love?"
"True love's kiss?" Horatio interjected, holding up a book he had in hand. "That's what the literary world seems to claim as a prime example."
"We have a plan!" Heinrik exclaimed, throwing his hands in the air. "All we need is true love's kiss to thaw Hans' heart!"
"That will never work," replied Harken in a dead-pan voice, his arms crossed.
"Why not?" Heinrik huffed, crossing his arms and raising his eyebrows to imitate his brother. "You heard Elsa, she says it only takes an act of true love, and true love's kiss is as… as true lovey as it gets!"
"Think about it, you idiot. Who's going to kiss him? You? You'd be more likely to kill him on contact," scoffed Harken.
"He's right," Elsa murmured, stroking her braid. "It has to be real."
"Dismissing the fact that all this talk of magic sounds entirely absurd… what if Mother kissed him?" Harvard suggested, looking to his younger brothers thoughtfully. "She loves him truly, and I'm sure it would be a better sight for him than if he were to wake up to one of us trying."
Slowly the brothers' voices blended together into a blur of noise and disagreement. Elsa stood rooted to the ground, her thoughts wildly roaring in her ears like a blizzard, memories of Hans flashing in her mind. I kissed him before, and I felt warm. Even talking to him makes me feel comfortable, happy… safe. It might not be the same for him, but we don't have time to think of anything else. She remembered their conversation, standing together amidst the snow as Hans emptied his heart and let his pain into the open.
"You have so much to give if you can only be willing to open yourself up…there are others who want to give you the same love she did… you only have to accept it."
"I'll do it!"
Another wave of silence drifted into the room like a haze, and everyone's conversations sifted away into nothing. Heinrik blinked in puzzlement. "You?"
"I'll do it," Elsa repeated, scanning the brothers with rising determination.
"But… you… I thought you said it has to be a kiss of true love tha-" Heins' eyebrows rose and his lips made a perfect "o" shape. "Ooooh…"
"I… I think I could love him." Elsa twisted her braid tightly, chewing on her lip. "If I can thaw his heart, I want to try. I have to try." Doubt clawed its way through her spirit, tearing the threads of her already paper-thin resolve. Her knees began to feel weak with all the eyes staring at her, some entirely unconvinced, some slightly skeptical, and all in awe. "Please let me try."
"Let us go with you," Harken stated, his tone flat, but sharp, as if it were more of an order than a request.
Elsa had not anticipated such a response, especially from him. "What? Why?"
"Because we all love him!" Heins exclaimed, stepping closer to her. "Because we're family, and we've all not always been the most supportive of him, but that doesn't mean we don't care. Family doesn't give up on one another. We don't leave anyone behind… and maybe so much love in one room will be enough. And… and even if it doesn't matter for the magic… it might matter to him. And it will matter to us."
Elsa dropped her gaze momentarily. Love is an open door, Anna says. Who am I to keep them out, to keep them away from their own brother? I will never make the same mistake my parents made. I will never keep someone away from love. "Yes." Her heart lifted as she smiled, going to the door. "Yes, please, all of you, come with me."
It took a little explanation and a lot of pleading before Helen finally acquiesced to allowing so many people in the recovery room, but her son was masterful with tugging at her heartstrings. She still insisted everyone give Hans a good deal of room, and allowed everyone a moment's visit with the unconscious Harald, but soon everyone's attention was on Hans. The silence seemed so much that Elsa could hear her knees pop as she knelt beside him. "I'm not sure what we have to do," she addressed her audience. "It all happened so fast when Anna saved me. All I can think to ask is that we all ruminate on our love for Hans, no matter how that love manifests."
She turned her attention solely on the figure lying in the bed, who looked more and more like a stranger each time she visited him. Only a few strands of his rich, coppery auburn hair now remained, the rest an eerie white sheen, offset against his clammy, lifeless skin. His eyes were closed, his chest quivering with each breath he took. She ran a few fingers through one of the remaining strands of his colored hair to wake him, bending to whisper next to his ear. "Hans… I'm here."
His eyes flickered open, dull and void of emotion, but his lips turned up in a weakened smile, his first word no more than a shuddering exhale. "Hi…" His gaze turned on the crowd behind her and his eyebrows tilted upwards in a meager show of surprise. "…everyone."
"Hello," came a chorused reply from his family members.
"We're all here, my love," Allowyn murmured, her grip tight on George's arm to keep control of herself. "We're all here, and we're going to help you get well."
"Sorry… I look… so bad," Hans murmured with a raspy cough, managing another, weaker smile.
"Nonsense, you look fabulous with white hair!" Heins exclaimed. "Really, I think it's a good color for you!"
Hans made a choked noise that sounded faintly like a chuckle, covering his mouth. "Thanks."
Elsa reached and took his hand in hers, inhaling quickly in shock. You're so cold… The cold had never bothered her, but the temperature of his skin was so low. He couldn't possibly survive much longer if he didn't get warmer. She glanced at the fireplace in the corner of the room, crackling with soft pops. She knew they were using all the firewood they had available, but they hadn't been planning for snow, so building their stock might take longer than the time Hans had left, even with all the servants working.
"S-sorry…" Hans murmured.
"It's alright," Elsa whispered, reaching out to cup his cheek in her hand. It had been incredibly awkward at first, knowing her kiss would be watched by the royal family and a few close friends, but the instant she looked into his eyes, all was forgotten in the surge of care she felt for him. She thumbed his cheek, lifting his head a few inches from the pillow, leaning in to meet his lips. As bare lips touched, she waited with baited breath for some sort of sign, some warmth or inexplicable light, something to tell her the kiss was working and his heart was thawing. It was only when she opened her eyes, and looked into his steady, undying blank gaze, that she knew the horrible truth.
It hadn't worked.
"No…" she whispered, fresh tears springing to her eyes and streaking down her cheeks. "No, no, this should work, you should be well, I don't understand!"
Hans framed her cheek with his own hand, trembling so wildly Elsa had to press it to her cheek to keep it from falling. He wiped at the small slipstreams of ice frozen on her skin, breaking them off with his thumb. "Now I know… how it feels."
"No," Elsa repeated, shaking her head. "No, Hans, it doesn't matter what you did anymore. I forgive you, I forgive everything." Bending suddenly, she kissed him again, and again, each time more desperately. "It's not your fault, it's not! You, you can't die, please… please, you can't."
"It's alright, Elsa," he rasped, bringing her hand to his lips to give it a single kiss and letting his eyes close to rest once more.
"No, no, it's not, how can you say that?" Those surrounding the queen took a few steps backward as the floor below became covered in a thin sheet of slowly spreading ice. "It's not alright, because I've never been able to freely love anyone in my life." She laid her head on his chest, listening to the thin, weak echo of his heart, her fingers scratching the cloth of his shirt. "Don't you see, Hans? I love you…" she whispered.
"It didn't work, George…" Allowyn buried her face in her husband's chest and began to weep. "It didn't work… and our baby is freezing to death, he's freezing," she cried.
George hugged her close to him, his arms tightening to stifle her cries. "Shhh, Allowyn… we can't give up, my love. We'll find a way, I promise. There must be a way."
"Mother... Father…" Everyone stopped short and turned in surprise to look behind them, where Harald stood rigidly in front of his bed, his left arm holding his right. His eyes dropped to look at the ground, his voice steady, but quiet. "Don't fear. We'll make a way."
"Do… do you… mean it?" Heins asked, stepping forward and looking hopefully at Harald.
Harald hesitated and grunted, glancing down at his right arm, which didn't move. Then he lifted his left arm to pat his brother's shoulder. "I mean it, little brother. I mean it." He walked over to join the company of the others, several of his brothers parting to let him through as he gazed down at Hans, his jaw tight and his eyes set as his brother's body shuddered recklessly. "Right, then. Nothing's going to happen if we all sit around here doing nothing. We have to keep him warm, am I right?" He glanced in Elsa's direction for reassurance.
Elsa nodded once, taken off guard by his sudden show of leadership, but she had to admit she'd never seen another man so fiercely determined as he looked. "That's right, it's all we can do while we think."
Nodding curtly, Harald faced Heins first. "You're an expert at fabric. Get to work and make some blankets, warm as you can, as quick as you can. Take Helena and the twins with you to help."
Heins nodded eagerly, taking Helena's hand and dashing away, the twins following behind him.
"Harken, you're one of the strongest and most ruthless with the blade. Take your ax and find the driest trees you can. Cut them down to the roots, we need all the firewood we can get. Hugo, you help him cut the trees down, and Hubert, Harvard…" He turned to his two eldest brothers. "You both help split the trees into pieces of firewood and bring them inside to keep the fire stoked."
Quick to react, the brothers dashed off as one. Harald faced Heinrik next. "You take Helm and Johan with you; get the warmest pieces of Hans' clothes you can find from his room. Dress him in them."
"But he's already wearing clothes," Heinrik replied, raising an eyebrow.
"More layers, more heat," Harald elaborated. "Warm socks, mittens, cover exposed pieces of his skin."
"Right!" Heinrik exclaimed, dashing off with his brother and best friend hot on his heels.
"What about us?" Horatio questioned, looking from Harry back to Harald. "What should we do?"
"We have to get the fire burning hotter. If we can't find firewood… until Harken and the others get trees felled, we have to use what we have. Go to the libraries. Pick out books you think we won't need. You know what's useful and what's not. You spend more time in there than anyone. Take what we don't need, use the books to fuel the fire."
Horatio nodded, already halfway out the door. "Come on, Harry. We've a job to do."
His brothers all otherwise occupied, Harald moved to the foot of Hans' bed. "Father, help me move the bed. He has to be closer to the fire."
George, his face showing his pride in his son's leadership, took the heavy headboard and grunted. "Ready, and up!"
Harald's face contorted in effort and them his edge dropped with a sudden thud. "Damn!" he exclaimed, his forehead lines creasing. "I… I can't lift it. My arm won't… it won't-"
"Use your left," Elsa interjected, taking his end of the bed in her hands. She gritted her teeth, grunting through them as her face contorted with effort. "Help me; I can't do it alone."
Harald blinked in surprise, and nodded, reaffixing his grip and hoisting as the three worked together to move Hans. "Good work." Harald set him before the fire, covertly wiping a hand across his forehead and leaning against wall beside the fireplace, doing his best not to look as exhausted as Elsa felt he was.
"Thank you," she breathed, touching his right arm and looking into his eyes. "You're a real hero, captain."
Harald smiled faintly at her, his breathing long and labored. "Not Captain… I'm not on duty."
#
Days and nights wore on until they blended one into the other, but there seemed to be no change for the better. George and Allowyn switched in shifts, but one or the other was always present in the room. The brothers, with their various tasks, were always tired, but not a word of complaint arose from them. Heins, in order to continue to keep the fire stoked, sacrificed pieces of clothing he knew would burn well in the flames, but Hans' hair had long since become completely white. Harken hunted for fresh meat to supply the cooks with ingredients for the most nutritious soup, but each time Hans managed to swallow less and less.
"Harald?" Heins asked one afternoon, entering the recovery room with a bowl of steaming soup, causing his brother to look up from Hans' bedside. Surprisingly enough, Harald had been the only one never to leave Hans' bedside, not for sleep, food, nor water.
"Mm?" Harald spoke in a murmur, too tired and weak to respond otherwise. He looked up and spotted the soup, serving his brother a questionable look. "It's not time for his lunch."
"It's for you," Heins replied, pulling up a stool and handing it off to his brother. He glanced at his mother kneeling close by, asleep, her head on Hans' bedside, her fingers grasping his sheets.
"I'm not hungry," Harald replied steadily, turning his eyes back to Hans and ignoring the bowl in his hands.
"You have to eat," Heins countered, leaning over and giving the spoon in the bowl an almost playful flick with his finger. "Don't make me feed you by force."
Harald flashed a look of amused disbelief at his brother, but he relented, taking a spoonful and lifting it slowly to his lips.
Heins sat in silence for a moment as his brother ate. When the spoon finally clattered upon empty bone china, he spoke again. It was no more than a whimper, his gaze fixed on Hans. "How long has it been?"
"Three days… I think," Harald mumbled, shaking his head with a low sigh. "I can't remember."
"Harald?" Heins whispered, bowing his head and putting it in his hands, shaking in silent weeping. "I'm scared."
Harald faced Heins, his stomach tightening almost to the point of pain when he saw his brother's fear, sharing the terrible feeling of helplessness. Not that Heins had ever been one of the particularly stronger brothers, but he was a brother, regardless, and the guilt mounting on Harald had never felt heavier. "Listen to me…" Heins turned to face Harald as he continued. "Don't be scared." He put his hand on Heins' shoulder and squeezed. You're a prince, for God's sake. You're supposed to be an example. The words were clear in his mind, but when he spoke, they came out very differently. "I'm right here. Everything is going to be okay… you should go to Helena. Go and tell her how Hans is doing."
"What should I tell her?" Heins asked, his green eyes sorrowful and red, evidence that he'd been crying not long ago.
"Tell her that he's alive." Harald ran a hand through his own hair. "That's the best news we can offer right now. And tell her that you love her."
Heins smiled briefly, took the empty soup bowl, and turned back towards his brother before going out the door. "I'll bring you some more soup in a little while. And this time I don't want to hear any backtalk about you not being hungry."
Harald chuffed with a single breath of laughter. "My mother is already here. I don't need two." As Heins was leaving, Harald cleared his throat to snag his attention. "Heins, see if you can find Queen Elsa. Hans always seems to breathe easier when she's nearby."
#
Elsa, of course, was more than eager to be allowed back into the recovery room, though she had been trying to allow some space and time for Hans and his parents, who were clearly struggling. She entered the waiting room and made her way to the recovery room, only to stop short as she heard a voice speaking from beyond the door. At first she thought Hans may have been awake and the queen was talking with her son but then she realized it was all one voice she heard: Harald's. Doing her very best to remain quiet, she turned the knob and carefully swung open the door, the voice becoming startlingly clear.
The queen lay gracefully sprawled out sleeping on a chaise lounge a few feet from Hans. Harald was bent over Hans, and he had one of his brother's hands clasped between both of his own. She could see even from her viewpoint there were tears in his eyes, and his right arm was shaking. His voice trembled as he spoke, low and deeper than normal, the words labored.
"I don't know what to do… God help me, I don't know what to do… I tried forgetting, tried force, tried denying it happened and there's no way I can win. I never stop wishing I had been there for her so long ago. Life's too short, they said. Life's too short for someone so young to pass so soon. Do you think it's easy for me to act like an oblivious fool, just pretending I was too little to understand, that I don't remember her? I wish I knew what to do. I wish I had never stolen those damn cigars, never said any of those things to you. Now I know what they meant at the funeral… now I know life's too short. And it's too late, I'm too late."
"What do you mean?" Elsa said instictively, standing in the doorway.
Harald reacted as if he had been shot at point blank range, stumbling back, a hand to his heart, gasping and panting at her presence. "Queen Elsa…"
"Just Elsa." She approached him with care, bending down to his level on her knees, forcing him to look her in the eye. "What did you mean by all those things you said?"
Harald stared at his hands outstretched in front of him and flexed them a few times, though the right did not react beyond a tiny twitch. "It doesn't matter now."
Elsa slipped a hand on his shoulder. "It matters to you."
Harald met her gaze for a moment that seemed to stretch on for centuries before finally answering. "If I'm going to talk… it must be to him."
"I understand," Elsa began, starting to stand up. She only got one leg up when he shook his head and suddenly grabbed her arm, holding her firm.
"I don't know if you're a blessing, or a curse, or maybe a part of you represents her spirit. You can stay… I… need someone else to be here or I might not go through with it. Please."
Elsa's lips parted and she sank back down beside him, the quivering in his voice making her anxious to hear what he had to say. "Alright. I'm here. I'll stay here."
Harald took his brother's hand, squeezing hard while clearing his throat roughly. "Hans…" he whispered, "Hans, wake up… it's Harald. I have to talk to you. Please, it's important."
Hans' eyelids flickered and opened as slits. His hair, a sheen of white all around, shone reflectively against the fire's light. "Mmnn…" he groaned, followed by a cough, murmuring several words before anything he said was intelligible. "Harald?"
"Hans… I have to tell you something. I should have told you years ago, but I didn't. I didn't tell anyone, and now it's too late… but I can't wait any longer…" He brought Hans' hand to brush it against his own forehead, breathing hard, his words shaking almost as much as his arm.
"I'm here," Hans said, turning his head so he could look at Harald, a corner of his mouth trying to tilt into a smile. "Tell me what's... so important."
"It's… it's about Kris. Her death… it's my fault, Hans. It's my fault, not yours."
Hans' eyes opened wider, and he grunted loudly as he struggled, sitting a little more upright, though his head was still on the pillow. Elsa did her best to hold him up, too much in shock to be of any help. "What… what are you talking about?" he rasped, "I was there when she died, I was the one who led her out onto the ice."
"Yes, you were, but you were trying to get to us, and if I hadn't have said anything to you about her leaving, you wouldn't have run out there at all, don't you understand? I was there, too. I saw you fall, Hans. And then… I saw her fall." Hans stared, his glassy, reflective eyes wide. "God, it's all so real… I had blocked it out for so long… but this winter it all came back. I was standing there, and I heard you coming and I… I just..." The present faded away to make way for the past, time slipping out of his control as he suddenly found himself watching old events unfold.
Another round of raucous coughing shook his body.
"Are you okay?" asked Hugo, who had always admired his brother, despite the fact that Harald was the younger.
"Fine," quipped Harald, taking another long puff.
"Are you sure we're supposed to inhale it?" Harken asked, examining his cigar with the unbroken arm, the opposite still in a sling from his accident earlier that month. "It's smoke. Why would we inhale smoke?"
"I don't know," Harald replied, doing his best not to wrinkle his nose. "But I'm telling you that's how it's done. I've been inside father's study before, I know how it's done."
"Yeah, because you've been in trouble before," sniffed Harken, taking a short whiff of the smoke.
"Shut up, at least I didn't fall and break my arm from the tree." Harald gave his brother a shove with his elbow, causing him to unleash a short cry of pain. "Sorry. At least I got rid of Hans. Can you imagine him trying one of these out?" He laughed, and his brothers followed suit. It was then he heard a sound, the sound of panting and thin yelling in the distance. Harald stiffened. "Come on… everybody stay low." He crawled out from the hollow tree and popped up just behind a thick piece of the root, groaning. "It's Hans… everybody be quiet."
"Why is he running? And should he be on the ice?" asked Hugo timidly.
"One of us should stop him," Harken said, looking at Harald pointedly. "I thought you said you got rid of him. Are you going to go get him or what?"
"I… I don't know. I mean, I-"
-CRACK!-
"He fell!" Hugo exclaimed, jolting up unbidden from their hiding place. "Oh my gosh, he fell in! Come on, we have to get him!"
"Are you crazy? Do you know how much trouble we'll be in when moder finds out we let him follow us here?" Harald rasped, pulling him back.
"What are you saying? He's our brother! We don't have a choice!" Harken argued, spinning and flinging snow everywhere.
"Look, there's Kris!" Hugo exclaimed, pointing across the lake.
"What is she doing? She'll fall, too!" Harken shrieked.
"Kris! Don't!" Harald shouted, rocketing up from behind the roots and extending a hand as he watched his sister lie down on her stomach, throwing her scarf out on the water. Dropping it in frustration, she clambered up and grabbed a sword, thrusting it through the break in the ice. "Don't!"
-CRACK!-
"She fell! What do we do?" Hugo wailed, twisting and turning to look at his two brothers for guidance. "What do we do?"
"We have to help!" Harken yelled, whirling around and looking for something to use to throw or offer. He hefted a broken branch in his good hand, nowhere near long enough to help, but as heavy as he could manage to carry. "Kris! Kris, grab this! Harald, help me!"
"I…I…" Harald stammered, eyes glued to the vision of his sister thrashing in the waters, choking out a cry for help. "No, no we can't!" he screamed, knocking the branch back. "Don't you get it? If we go after them, we'll fall, too!"
"Harald, come on!" Harken took his brother's arm and tugged. "Come on, I can't do it alone! I'm not strong enough!"
"No!" Harald shouted, rooted to the spot as his sister flailed, splashing against the ice and breaking it further. "I can't! I can't!"
"Why?" Harken yelled back, panting for breath, puffs of vapor rising with his shout. He pulled on his brother's arm, hard, and stopped with a stunned look as he saw his brother suddenly burst into tears.
"Because I'm scared!" he screamed, clenching his ears. "I'm scared!" Wiping at his eyes, he stared, horrified as there was a sudden burst of water and Hans emerged, rolling to a stop a foot away from the break. His brother was more phantom than person, barely breathing, his hair coated in frost. "Hans!" If his brother heard him, he didn't respond.
"W-where's Kris?" Hugo asked, his voice quivering.
"We have to get help!" Harken exclaimed, shaking Harald, who stared at the still Hans. "Now!" Harald nodded wildly, blinking away the tears as he broke into a sprint. Branches scratched at his arms and face as he pumped his arms and ran from the scene. He could not stop crying, and even through the world around him was nothing more than blurred white, the image of his brother remained clear.
#
"I saw you fall, Hans. I saw you fall and I just sat there because I was afraid." Harald did his best to choke off his tears, though they slowed, falling hot and heavy down his cheeks. "Kris died because of me."
"But all this time..." Hans gasped, his eyes filling with tears of his own. "You let me believe it was my fault. You let me think I killed my own sister."
"I know." Harald bowed his head, his breath coming in slow pants, his shoulder shaking with another round of silent sobs. "I-I know, I know and I'm so sorry..."
"You pretended I was invisible, Harald... for two years." Hans shook as he tried once again, unsuccessfully, to prop himself up on his elbows, his breath coming with puffs of vapor, despite the roaring of the fire. "You, Hugo, and Harken, all of you."
"That's my fault, too," Harald lamented, his voice grated with emotion. "I told them we had to pretend you were invisible, because I thought, stupid as I was, if we didn't see you, didn't think about you, maybe we could forget it all happened. Because every time I looked at you, I saw what happened. I saw myself for what I was: a coward. I woke so many nights from those nightmares. But I had to shut you out... because it was the only way I could shut out the memory."
"I always thought you hated me," Hans whispered hoarsely. "But mother insisted it was because you needed to be alone for your studies... that being captain of the guard was hard."
Harald shook his head once, locking eyes with his brother. "I chose that because... because I wanted to protect my family, Hans... because I wanted to change. I thought if I trained to become captain of the guard, I could learn courage. I would never be afraid to act again."
"I never knew," Hans gasped out, frost speckling his lips. "I... never..."
"Nor did I..." Elsa turned to see the queen, sitting on the chaise very much awake, her hands covering her mouth, tears spilling from her eyes. "Oh, Harald... Hans... my sons... my sons." She staggered over to them as quickly as her movements would allow, collapsing close enough to gather them into her arms. She bent to kiss Hans' cheek, gasping as she touched him and jerking back in surprise, her eyes going wide with horror. "Hans!"
Where his cheek had once been warm and pink, now there were tiny slivers of ice spreading across the flesh. "Oh, God, no!" Allowyn screamed, taking his hands in her own, crying harder. "Please, God!" His fingers had darkened from soft blue into darkened nubs, drained of life, hard and cold as ice.
Elsa's heart leaped into her throat, prompting her to stumble to her feet and streak towards the door. She had to get the family here, before any chances to save him, or at the very least, to say goodbye, were lost completely. News of Hans' rapidly declining condition spread like wildfire through the halls of the castle, and it wasn't but moments later his entire family had gathered once more beside his bed. Even George could no longer peel his wife away from his son's side.
"I'm so sorry, Hans," Harald rasped to his brother, the continuing curse turning Hans' hands to no more than detailed ice sculptures.
"Elsa," Hans breathed, the curse traveling hungrily along his arms to his chest. "I can't breathe, I can't-"
Elsa leaned over Hans and tried to force the ice back, to stop the winter warring for control over his life, but it was an impossible battle. Harald's eyes reddened with further tears. "I deserted you once, Hans, but I won't leave you now. Remember the truth, Hans. You remember that I'm responsible for Kris' death, not you, do you hear me? You're not responsible. I am."
Hans faced Harald, and felt his lungs aching for air. Every gasp was like a fight for oxygen against a thinning elevation. He took another breath, forcing it to be a deep one despite the pain it caused him. Then, knowing they may be his last words, he tried to speak them with pride. "A prince forgets the trespasses against him, no matter how terrible." The entire party realized that within those words hung forgiveness, a real forgiveness, letting go of years filled with torment and anguish.
Harald gripped his brother's shoulders, the hard slopes of ice cold beneath his fingers, and bent his head close to his brother's ear. "He sacrifices for others, even to the expense of his soul."
"He forgives," Hans fought for air, "until he forfeits breath."
"He is strong, he is compassionate, and the sum of these things makes him complete," Harald recited, leaning in close to his brother, unaware of the crowd behind him echoing the words.
"A prince," Hans gasped out, a wheeze of air like a fading last note on a symphony.
"A prince-" reinforced Harald, bending down to his brother and choking through clenched teeth, "-you are, and a prince you will always be." His brother's face began to glaze over with ice, his body completing the hated transformation before everyone's eyes. Harald fought off a sob, his tears falling onto the ice as he seethed into his hands. "I love you, Hans."
It wasn't surprising to hear Heins begin to cry, nor Helena's soothing words among her own weeping. Harald expected the hands of his brothers helping him up to his feet, the touch of his mother wrapping her arms around him. What he did not expect was a sudden glow, no more than a glimmer at first, centered around Hans' chest. Like snow melting away, color began to return to Hans, starting from his clothing, spreading to his arms. Harald gasped with a sharp intake of breath as the white in Hans' hair washed away, his auburn coloring springing back to life. Slowly, his eyelids fluttered, opening to reveal green. Hans grunted, propping himself up with great effort, the last of the ice disappearing.
"But… but I… I don't understand," stammered Harald, sinking to his knees in bewilderment.
"An act of true love…" Heins breathed, a smile slowly spreading until it was ear to ear. "You did it, you wanted him to know it wasn't his fault! And then he forgave you for everything! Another act of true love!"
For a moment, the Hans and Harald just stared at one another, and then both suddenly met halfway in a crushing embrace.
Allowyn threw herself forward and kissed both of their heads. "Oh, Hans… Hans, you're alive. Harald, I'm so proud of you, I've never been prouder!"
"Well, look at you," Helen gently enthused as she approached the two.
"Yeah, well… he's my brother," Harald muttered, smiling and sniffing once, cheeks getting hot as he realized how many eyes were witness to their hug. "But don't get to expect it every day," he grumbled in embarrassment.
"It's not that," Helen said in a tone of amusement. "Take a look at your arm. You're using it."
Harald blinked, and looked at his right arm. The fingers were curled, immobile, but his arm was wrapped around Hans by choice. He had a choice. And he was going to pursue it. He hung back after a moment and gave Hans a pat on the back, and not a moment later Elsa pushed him to the side, flinging her arms around Hans. She met his lips in a passionate kiss, savoring his warmth, his life, the way he returned the kiss with the same intensity.
Hans parted and flashed Harald a grin, to which his brother held up his arms defensively. "You already got a hug from me. That's all you're gonna get, brother."
"Isn't it wonderful, Helena? Hans has been thawed and we're all together and I have you and everything's going to be alright now!" Heins gave her a kiss of his own, twirling her dizzily around the room.
Heinrik, who was standing next to him, groaned with disgust and muttered to Johan. "So unfair. Heins gets himself a princess of his own design and Hans gets a queen. And what do I have? You."
"Oh, don't get barnacles in your britches, mon capitan." Johan chuckled and served him a playful shove. "You have your good looks. Be patient. The sea'll bring the right one to you when she's good and ready."
"Three cheers for Harald! Hip-hip!" Heins started. The other brother's voices chimed in soon afterward. "Hooray! Hip-hip, hooray! Hip-hip, hooray!"
Harald composed himself, getting to his feet, smiling so hard his cheeks were beginning to hurt. It felt so good to smile again that he ignored the pain, certain he could hear Hans' voice cheering louder than all the rest, and even more hopeful the cheering meant only good times lay ahead... for all of them.
A/N: Well! What a chapter. Can I still have some reviews? Did it make you cry? Laugh? Smile? All of the above? We are winding down now. Yes, you heard it right. I'm afraid the next one, the epilogue, will be our last. But that's no reason to be sad, readers. Good things come to those who wait...