*Okay…I did my best to get this finished as I am heading out of town for a few days and wanted to post something before I left. I hope you all enjoy this one and thanks for reading and reviewing. Have a great weekend!

Open Hands

Chapter 19

Maura stood at the kitchen sink watching the early morning sun creep into her backyard as she prepared to make coffee. The water was running as she held a carafe under the spigot but her attention was elsewhere. She couldn't stop the smile from spreading across her face as the memory of waking up wrapped in Jane's arms came to her mind.

The feeling of Jane pressing against her pulled Maura from her sleep but she didn't open her eyes right away. Instead, she lay there feeling the weight of Jane's arm as it wrapped around her waist, enjoying a feeling she never thought she'd feel again. She could feel small puffs of air against her neck as Jane's breathing continued at a slow, steady pace indicating she was still asleep. For a few moments longer, Maura stayed silent and still until she could no longer stand not seeing Jane next to her. Opening her eyes, she found Jane lying on her side. Her face was nestled against Maura's shoulder and her dark hair was spread out over the pillow they were sharing. The sight brought a smile to Maura's lips as a warm sensation spread over her body starting where Jane's hand was touching bare skin. With mild curiosity, Maura noticed that her camisole had crept up over her stomach giving Jane a place to rest her hand. The feeling of a warm palm pressing against her side sent a tingling sensation along the exposed skin and she couldn't stop the shiver that traveled up her spine. As carefully as she could, she lifted herself up just enough to notice that Jane's tank top had also moved up to reveal the abdominal muscles that Maura knew she'd find beneath. As her eyes traveled over the newly bared skin that her fingers itched to touch, she caught her first glimpse of the scars that Jane had been afraid to reveal to her earlier. The thin white lines stood out against the olive colored skin and the need to touch almost overwhelmed her. Taking a deep breath and moving as carefully and quietly as she could, she reached over with a shaky hand to run her index finger over the slightly raised skin. Deep down, she knew that her touch would rouse Jane from her sleep but she couldn't stop herself. She needed to feel, needed to know that Jane was alright. Her eyes widened in wonder at the first brush of skin against skin. Even though the scar was light and thin, it was pronounced enough for Maura to trace with the tip of her finger. The move did rouse Jane who opened her eyes and blinked a few times in confusion but Maura didn't stop her exploration as her finger moved a little higher to skim along the hem of Jane's tank top.

"What're you doin'?" Jane's voice was thick with sleep as she looked down to see Maura's hand touching her.

"I'm sorry…" Maura pulled her hand away from the soft, silky skin that had beckoned to her earlier.

"No…s'alright." Jane reached for Maura's hand to stop its retreat. Bringing it back to where she had found it when she woke up, she gave a somewhat groggy smile. "I like having you touch me."

"I shouldn't have done it without your permission." Maura shook her head but didn't resist Jane as her hand was placed back where it had been earlier.

"No Maur…it's okay. Really…" Jane sighed when she felt Maura's skin make contact with her own. "I want you to see…I want to share…" She lifted her tank top up higher, allowing the hem to rest just below her breasts. "This is who I am now…" Her hand found Maura's again and she pressed her open palm against the back of Maura's in an effort to guide her over the places she had kept hidden.

"These…" Maura rolled over and pushed Jane onto her back. "Are not who you are…" She hovered over Jane looking into dark eyes filled with something she never thought she'd see…shame.

"I shouldn't have let him do this to me…it was my fault." Jane started to say but was stopped when Maura kissed her with an urgency she'd never felt before. At first it was hard and demanding and Jane realized that Maura was just trying to shut her up. When she gave up trying to talk, the kiss turned slow and tender as their lips, then their tongues brushed together. The sensation almost sent Jane over the edge and it caused her to push Maura away so she could reign in the out of control feelings she was struggling to understand.

"Too much?" Maura had sensed the change in the body beneath hers and even though she wanted nothing more than to finish what she started, she also knew that Jane needed to go slow.

"Um…maybe…just a little." Jane gave her a sheepish grin as she tried to catch her breath. "But I like where it's headed."

"Can I see?" Maura tilted her head towards Jane's stomach where their hands were still connected.

"Yes…I want you to." Jane let out a shaky breath, not at all sure she was ready.

"Are you sure?" Maura had sensed that Jane was trying but also still uncertain.

"Yes…" Jane's voice didn't tremble this time.

Carefully, Maura moved to straddle Jane's hips so she could look down at her stomach. Her eyes swept over the skin that was now exposed to her and then she glanced up asking Jane for permission to touch her again. When Jane nodded, Maura moved her hands to rest on either side of Jane's stomach. She flexed her fingers along Jane's sides and placed her thumbs closer to the center where she began to gently brush them back and forth.

"You're strong and beautiful Jane. Don't let anyone tell you differently." Maura looked down to watch her hands move over the taut muscles of Jane's abs. "Do you know what I see when I look at these…?" Her fingers moved until she was tracing along another scar, this time just below Jane's left breast. Dragging her attention away from what her hands were doing, she glanced up for an answer. Jane's breath had become slightly labored and Maura could tell that Jane was concentrating on the feeling of hands moving over her skin so she asked again. "Jane…do you know what I see?" When Jane finally looked up at her, their eyes locked and Maura thought she may have seen fear hidden in the uncertainty as Jane just shook her head because she was unable to find her voice. "I see someone who fought her way back…some who wouldn't give up…someone who lived to see another day..." Maura leaned forward and placed a long slow kiss on Jane's slightly parted lips. "I see a survivor Jane…"

"Jesus Maur…I don't know much longer I can survive this…" Jane let out a long slow breath.

"I promise that if you tell me to stop…I will." Maura moved away from Jane's mouth but didn't move her hands. Slowly and with purpose, she shifted until her body was halfway down Jane's. Glancing up, she could see that Jane was watching her with a deep look of concentration on her face, wondering what Maura was going to do next. With a small smile, Maura leaned forward again and placed a tender kiss to the raised line that started somewhere under Jane's tank top between her breasts and stopped just above her belly button. The kiss was light as Maura skimmed her lips along the slightly raised scar tissue before moving to another one, and then another one. The muscles in Jane's stomach started to twitch and shake under Maura's gentle ministrations and she couldn't suppress the moan that came from somewhere deep within her chest.

Oh, God Maura…it feels so good…but…" Jane hesitated and turned her head to avoid looking at Maura.

"But it's too much too soon." Maura pressed her lips just a little harder than before against Jane's soft, yet muscular stomach before pulling back so she could look at Jane. "Hey…look at me…please." She pleaded when she saw that Jane wouldn't look at her. It wasn't until Jane finally brought her gaze back to look at Maura that she saw the tears Jane was struggling so hard to hold back. "Oh, Jane…what's wrong?"

"I'm sorry…I want this so much…but I just can't yet." Jane let out a shaky breath as tears started to roll down her cheeks. "I feel like I'm letting you down."

"Oh, my sweet, sweet Jane..." Maura moved up Jane's body until they were face to face. "We have plenty of time to get to know each other again…I'm not going anywhere." She tried to reassure. "But thank you for this…" Her hands moved over Jane's stomach again and the warm skin. "Thank you for sharing these with me…" Fingers traced along the several scars that she could see.

"There are more…" Jane said with a resigned sigh.

"I know…I was there when they stitched you up. I memorized each and every one of them." Maura looked into Jane's eyes doing her best to convey her understanding before glancing down at her hands as they moved over Jane's body. "When the time comes though…I plan to map out every dip and curve of your body, refresh my memory if you will, no matter how long it takes." With those final words, she brought her gaze back up to find that Jane's eyes had turned to a soft suede indicating she was relaxed and happy.

Movement from somewhere behind caught Maura's attention, drawing her thoughts back to the present.

"What're you thinking about?" Jane slipped her arms around Maura's waist and rested her chin on the shoulder in front of her.

"Just remembering how nice it was to wake up in your arms this morning." Maura sighed contently as she turned her attention to the carafe she had been trying to fill with water. When she finished, she turned around, dislodging Jane's hold on her. She lifted up on to her tippy toes and gave Jane a quick kiss as consolation. Jane raised a questioning eyebrow and Maura held up the carafe indicating what she was trying to do. With an understanding nod, Jane stepped away to allow Maura to continue making the coffee she was especially in need of.

"It was nice, wasn't it?" Jane said as she moved to stand next to Maura and the coffee maker. She placed her palms on either side of her hips and hoisted herself up so she could sit on the counter. Watching Maura with a crooked grin, she waited patiently until she was finished before grabbing and pulling Maura to stand between her legs.

Maura let out a squeak of surprise when she felt Jane grab her and pull her to stand between two long legs that were now dangling over the counter. She allowed herself to be moved until she was pressed against Jane giving her the opportunity to put her arms around Jane's waist. Nestling her check against Jane's chest, she inhaled the light scent of lavender and vanilla and smiled. She could hear the strong, steady heart beat beneath her ear and she said a small prayer of thanks because she knew more than anyone that things could have ended differently. The unwelcomed thoughts caused her to breathe in deeply before exhaling a shaky breath.

The shaky breath that Maura let out got Jane's attention but she wasn't ready to relinquish her hold on the smaller body wrapped around her own. She rested her chin on top of Maura's head and closed her eyes. "Wanna talk about it?" Her voice was soft and quiet so as not to disturb the moment or startle Maura who seemed to be deep in thought. Before Maura could answer, there was a light tapping at the back door startling them both. When Jane opened her eyes, she could see her mother standing outside, peering in through the window on the door with a sheepish and somewhat apologetic smile on her face. "Will you tell me later what's got you so worried?" Jane reached down to tilt Maura's face up so they could look at each other.

Biting down on her bottom lip, Maura nodded reluctantly before taking another deep breath.

"Guess one of us better let my Ma in…" Jane jumped off of the counter and placed a quick kiss to the corner of Maura's mouth.

"I'll start breakfast…" Maura smiled at Jane reassuring her that everything was okay.

"You know once you invite her in…you'll never get rid of her." Jane couldn't help but smirk as she headed over towards the door. "Are you sure?"

"Absolutely…" Maura gave Jane a quick wink before turning her attention to making them something to eat.

Angela watched Jane over the rim of her coffee cup and couldn't suppress her smile at the pout on Jane's face.

"But I don' wanna go to work today…" Jane whined as Maura moved around the kitchen before coming to stand over Jane who was sitting at the kitchen table drinking her coffee.

Running her fingers through dark, unruly locks, Maura couldn't help but think that Jane's grouchy disposition was made all the more adorable by her sulky expression. She bent down to place a quick kiss to Jane's cheek and then whispered in her ear. "I think maybe you should pack an overnight bag so you don't have to go home to change next time."

Jane nodded her agreement with enthusiasm as she took a sip of her coffee. Her eye's followed Maura as she walked away from the table towards the kitchen again. As Maura disappeared from her view, her eyes came to rest on light, hazel twinkling playfully at her. She couldn't stop herself from grimacing at the smirk on her mother's face before setting her cup down to face the interrogation she was sure was coming.

"So…" Angela continued to look over at Jane, a sly grin on her face. "You spent the night." It was a statement, not a question.

Jane gritted her teeth, causing her mouth to turn into a grim line as she flexed her jaw muscles. Looking down at her coffee and the dark liquid that reflected the grim expression she was wearing, she took a deep breath and nodded.

"Why am I not surprised?" Angela pressed even though she sensed that Jane wasn't in the mood to talk about it. The invitation to breakfast was something that she hadn't expected but when Jane answered the back door in her tank top and a pair of way too short pajama bottoms she had been struck speechless.

"Look Ma…not that it's any of your business, but I slept in the guest room." Jane was suddenly feeling defensive but she wasn't sure why.

"Jane…you and Maura are grown women, you don't need to explain anything to me." Angela continued to watch Jane, her eyes alight with something between playfulness and curiosity.

"Then why do I feel like I'm being examined under a microscope?" Jane brought her gaze back to her mother's and did her best to stare back without blinking. "You have this uncanny way of looking at me…like you are trying to read my mind. It's unnerving…" She looked away again as the weight of Angela's stare pressed down on her.

"I'm sorry, that's not my intention." Angela let out a heavy sigh as she set her cup down. "Look, I'm glad to see you two trying again. God knows I've missed having Maura around but are you ready for this? Can you give her everything she deserves?"

"Jesus Ma…you act like I'm some sort of heartless bitch." Jane's ire piqued as she shifted uncomfortably in her chair. "I'm positive…nothing will ever come between Maura and me again." She said before realizing that she had just clued her mother into something she shouldn't have.

"So…something did come between you…" Angela mulled the many scenarios over in her head as she reached over to put her hand on Jane's arm. "Listen…I won't ask, I promise. I just want you to be happy…both of you."

At first Jane's temper flared but the feeling of Maura standing behind her brought an instant calm. The light touch of Maura's hand on her shoulder exacted a peaceful sensation that washed over her in waves.

"I know you want us to be happy Angela and that is what we are working on…together." Maura's voice was resolute and her smile genuine.

"Don't mind me, I'm just being a mother hen. I just want you both to make sure you aren't rushing into anything…that's all." Angela watched as Maura moved around to sit next to Jane. She noticed the familiar ease that settled over them both when they were close to each other. Silently she rejoiced at what she knew was the beginning of something wonderful, something they both deserved.

"We get it Ma…but trust me…we haven't been rushing nearly as much as I'd like us to be." Jane gave Maura an apologetic smile. Her mind turned to the conversation they had had earlier that morning, the one that centered around her fears and insecurities.

"Trust me when I say this, we have plenty of time…" Maura took Jane's hand in her own, interlacing their fingers. "Plenty of time to get to know each other again."

"See, that's all I've been trying to say." Angela let out a frustrated huff. "You've got plenty of time…take things slow…" She waved her hands in the air, only stopping when she saw both Jane and Maura watching her with mild amusement. "Well, all I was trying to say was that you have your whole lives to get reacquainted."

"As much as I hate to change the subject…" Maura let out a heavy breath. "We really need to get to work."

"But I don'wanna go to work today." Jane huffed, the pout returning to her face.

Maura glanced over at Angela who was doing her best to keep a straight face but when she saw the cracks in the façade, neither one of them could contain their laughter.

"What?" Jane groused as she watched both woman roil with laughter.

"Nothing dear…" Angela stood up as she wiped her watering eyes. "I'll leave you to it." She said as she patted Jane on the shoulder on her way towards the back door. "Good luck Maura…she used to pull the same stunt when she was in the second grade, pout and all." She said over her shoulder as she closed the door behind her and her heart lifted at the idea that Jane was finally finding some peace in her life.

The afternoon was dragging along in an agonizing way as Jane sat back in her chair with a frustrated huff. Running her fingers through her hair, she threw her pen down on the desk before crossing her arms in a show of defiance.

"Hey…what's up?" Korsak asked from where he was sitting at his own desk. He had a concerned look on his face as he peered at her over the rims of his glasses.

"Nothin'…," She sighed as she picked her pen up again. "Just bored I guess."

"Well, paper work's part of the process…you know that." He turned his attention back to his own work but not before giving her a stern look that spoke volumes.

"Whatever…" She couldn't stop herself from glaring his direction, daring him to say something else.

"She's just missing Maura." Frost spoke up and then ducked when Jane tossed her pen at him. "What?" He asked innocently. "It's true."

"I thought you'd be excited about the interdepartmental softball tournament." Korsak glanced up from what he was doing.

"Maura and I can't be on the same team." Jane let out a puff of air and crossed her arms again.

The move surprised Korsak who was used to Jane's usually stoic demeanor. "Are you pouting?" He asked as he pulled his glasses off so he could see her better.

"No…" Jane tried not to sound petulant.

"Yes…you are…you are actually pouting." He dropped his glasses and started to laugh. "I'll be damned…Jane Rizzoli is pouting."

Jane continued to glare over at Korsak, her dark eyes flashing with her barely contained anger. "It's just that I wish Maura and I could play on the same team." She tried to reason.

"You know she has her own department. I'm sure it won't be long before she's warming the bench cheering for you…what with her team consisting of a bunch of…" He paused to think about what to say and only continued when he had the right words. "A bunch of non-athletic types."

"I wouldn't count Maura out just yet…" Frost piped up and grinned over at Jane. "I heard that she whipped your butt at the batting cages once."

"Well, it's been a few years." Jane glanced over at him but she couldn't suppress her smile at the memory his words evoked. Maura had indeed whipped her butt and in the process had shown her how to improve her batting stance giving her an advantage during her last year on the high school baseball team. "But I don't think I have anything to worry about."

"Care to make a friendly wager?" Maura asked from the doorway of the bullpen. She stood with her arms crossed and a raised eyebrow as she smirked over at Jane who had a sheepish expression on her face.

"Um…what do you have in mind?" Jane tried not to sound surprised at Maura's proposition.

"Well, perhaps we should come up with something everyone can join in on." Maura's eye's twinkled playfully at Jane before she turned her attention to Frost. "Any ideas?"

"How 'bout the losing team has to streak naked through the lobby?" He asked but quickly recanted when he caught Jane's withering glare. "Wait…I've got it." He held up his finger as if he had just had a huge revelation. "Karaoke…"

"Karaoke?" Korsak, Jane, and Maura all said simultaneously.

"Yeah…losers have to sing whatever the winners pick. There's this great Karaoke place Frankie and I go to sometimes. They've got a bar and good food. It'd be fun." Frost shrugged his shoulders.

"I'm game if you are?" Maura tilted her head towards Jane who conceded with a nod.

"So what you're proposing is that whoever wins gets to pick the songs that the losers will have to sing." Korsak asked as he picked up his glasses again and began to chew on the frame as he contemplated.

"Yep…" Frost grinned as he came to realize that his idea was actually being taken seriously.

"Deal…" Jane slapped her hands together before rising from her desk. "I suggest you brush up on your Madonna Dr. Isles." She gave a saucy wink as she walked over to where Maura was standing. "Now...let's get outta here and get some lunch." Grabbing Maura's hand on the way out of the bullpen, she pulled her along until they were standing in front of the elevator doors.

"As you wish…" Maura said as she gave the hand in her own a gentle squeeze. Glancing over at the self-assured grin on Jane's face, she couldn't help but wonder if maybe she did need to brush up on her Madonna.