I seem to be in an Ark mood lately haha! So you get some good old Ark times!
Enemies
Abby stormed out of the Council room, still fuming from the heated session. It had gone too far. Debates were all well and good, debates that escalated to outright political wars weren't unheard of, but shouting and slamming fists on the table like what had just happened? Bolting out of chairs and name calling? Being scolded by the Chancellor like children at kindergarten?
Granted she shouldn't have called Kane an asshole.
But he shouldn't have stood up and slammed his palm on the table to make her stop talking. Even if she had run out of time and it had been his turn and even if she had been viciously tearing his character down to shreds.
She hated having to sit there and being forced to see him. She hated his smugness. She hated…
The hand that closed around her arm was anything but gentle and she barely had time to shout a "Hey!" before she was dragged to the closest empty room. A security post of some kind where a guard was slouched on his chair, not really paying attention to what was happening on the numerous monitor.
"Out!" Kane growled and the guard scrambled up and out of that room with a frightened "Yes, sir.". Once the door had closed behind the poor guy, he straightened up, using his superior height to look down at her.
Abby sneered at the obvious and not so subtle power display, shrugging his grip off. She didn't try to step away. First because the room was little more than a glorified cupboard and there wouldn't be far to go and then because she absolutely refused to be intimidated.
"What do you want?" she hissed.
"You can't talk to me like that, Abby." he spat, anger dripping out in his every word. Apparently she wasn't the only furious party here. "Certainly not in front of the Council."
"Why? Are you afraid you will lose points?" she mocked. "Are you afraid they will think you can't defend your opinion? What sort of would-be Chancellor would…"
"Oh, please." he scoffed. "You think it reflects well on you? Calling me names instead of arguing your case? What sort of would-be Chancellor would even plead a case you know you don't have?"
She clenched her jaw and glared at him, jutting her chin in the air, annoyed to be forced to look up, to do so properly. "I'm right."
"No, you're not." he snorted, almost mocking. "Because if you were we both know you would have made a stronger case instead of calling me a power hungry asshole."
He looked so smug, so sure of himself… She wasn't a violent person, she wasn't but there were days she wanted to rip that smugness off his face.
"That's what you are." she retorted.
She wanted him to lose countenance but his earlier anger seemed to be gone now – or at least very well hidden. He looked like he always looked lately: cold, calm and detached.
"If this is about Jake…" he started.
"Don't you dare say his name." she warned, taking a step forward, very much in his space. He didn't move. Then again, she supposed it was hard to be intimidating when she barely reached his shoulder. "Don't you dare."
"Does it help you sleep better at night to pile it all on me?" he growled and there it was again: the anger. "I'm not the one who went to Jaha."
"No, you're the one who included Clarke in the charges." she snapped. "You're the one who let himself be used. If you hadn't…"
"If I hadn't done it, someone else would have." he shouted right back. "And I thought you would defend him, Abby… I thought…"
"Are you seriously putting that on me?" she cut him off.
"You abstained." he accused.
"And you voted for." she snarled. "You voted to float your best friend."
"And you abstained from voting against floating your husband." he scowled. "And you did it because you knew it was the right call."
She gritted her teeth, breathing fast and blinking hard against the familiar burn of tears in her eyes. He was right, of course, when it came down to it, she was the one who was responsible. She had gone to Jaha and Jaha…
"You included Clarke in the charges." she insisted. It came out a little too weak.
"She was involved." he argued.
"She is seventeen and you've known her since she was born." she spat. "You held her the day she was born. And you've sentenced her to death. You were our friend and…"
And she missed him, that was maybe the worst thing about the whole thing. She hated Marcus Kane. She did. How could she not? But she missed his friendship. Even when they used to fight and argue about politics, it had never gotten as nasty and personal as it now did. And she was willing to admit she was often the one who made it nasty but…
"Abby…" he sighed, reaching for her shoulder.
She batted his arm away. "No! It isn't about this anyway. It's about you and your stupid proposal…"
"My proposal is good and you know it." he scowled. "You're just being your usual stubborn self and opposing just to get back at me. It's all about Jake. It's always all about…"
She shoved him against the door. Hard. He stumbled back but she figured it was mostly because he hadn't been expecting a physical attack. He should have known better.
"Stop saying his name!" she demanded, slamming a fist against his chest, annoyed to find it so hard under her hand she doubted he would so much as bruise. "Stop saying his name! You don't get to say his name. Everything is your fault. Everything is your fault!"
She hit him again. She hit him three times and the only reason he let her was probably because he was shocked she would go that far. He could arrest her for this. He could arrest her and maybe even had her floated if he played his cards right. But he wouldn't. That was the worst thing. She knew he wouldn't. Because he was a power hungry asshole but not that kind of power hungry asshole. And she hit him a fourth time for it because she had betrayed Jake so many times and maybe that was what she deserved. She would have hit him again but he grabbed her wrists and when she struggled, he rolled them over and pinned her against the door.
"Abby…" he said again, sounding far too sad and knowing.
"Everything is your fault." she insisted, her voice breaking. She stopped fighting him. What was the point? He was bigger, stronger and unlike her he didn't intend to hurt her.
"Fine. Okay. Everything is my fault." he said quickly. He let go of her wrists and let his hands hover awkwardly over her shoulders. He didn't give her back her space. It was intimate. Too intimate. It was like a hug but without actual contact. "I know you hate me but, please, can I just…"
She scoffed at that and met his eyes, lips pursed tight and blinking hard, unable to keep the tears from rolling down her cheeks. Something passed between them, then. Something they might have been denying and burying deep for some time. Since before Jake's arrest. Since her marriage had started deteriorating. Since Jake had gotten angry with her for not seeing his point about telling the truth versus hiding it. Since Marcus had been there every time, a helpless witness to the months of hell they had all gone through, always willing to listen to her and lend comfort when necessary.
Political opponents hadn't meant enemies, then.
It had just added tension to their friendship. A tension that had slowly turned into something neither of them had been willing to acknowledge, least of all her. But she had never been talented at lying to herself and she knew it was there, she had known it had been there for a very long time.
Yes, she had betrayed Jake in more ways than one, in thoughts if not in acts.
"Everything is your fault." she whispered again even if it wasn't fair.
He had never done or said anything. He wasn't that kind of men. She had been married to his best friend and… He wasn't that kind of men.
But if he had tried, she wasn't sure she would have stopped him. Not with the constant fights Jake and her had gotten into for the last few months of his life, not with Clarke systematically siding with her father even back when she hadn't known what it was about. She had been so lonely and Marcus had been a good friend…
And now…
Now he had floated her husband and had arrested her daughter and if it had been wrong before, being attracted to him still…
"Abby." he whispered, finally settling his hands on her shoulders. He did it carefully, as if not sure she wasn't going to start hitting him again. She didn't, couldn't. Not when he said her name like that, as if it was something precious. "I'm sorry."
She wasn't sure what he was sorry about. For obeying Jaha's orders or for the forbidden thrill of this almost embrace?
He sounded sincere though, so far from the heart cold cruel Commander he now behaved like that she found her last barriers crumbling.
With a slow breath, she surrendered.
She bowed her head and dropped her forehead on his shoulder. When she felt his hands hesitantly move, one of them cradling the back of her skull and the other pulling her closer, she wrapped her arms around his waist and rested her whole weight against him.
She didn't cry.
She bit her bottom lip until she tasted blood but she refused to break into a sobbing mess.
His fingers tangled in her braid and she felt his mouth being pressed to the top of her head.
"I feel guilty too." he said quietly.
About which part?, she wanted to ask but she had a good idea. Like her. About the whole thing.
"I can't do this." she murmured.
His fingers clenched on her shoulder and she tightened her embrace a little. It felt right. Being in his arms. It felt right and that was the worst thing.
"It's too soon." he agreed.
"No." she countered sadly. "I can't… Not with Clarke… And… It's too complicated, Marcus."
She couldn't remember the last time she had called him Marcus. He had been Kane ever since Jake's death.
"If the Earth thing works out…" he hesitated.
"If the Earth thing works out, you will still be the man who arrested her father…" she said. "She will never understand."
And she would never know the truth either. It was cowardly on Abby's part to let Wells take the blame but… She couldn't bear the thought of Clarke knowing the truth. Jake had been Clarke's hero, she had always been closer to him than to Abby… There would be no forgiving that. And she didn't want to lose her baby. Not to an airlock. Not for a man.
He was silent for a long time. Eventually, he rested his cheek against the top of her head. "We didn't do a bad job of keeping it… friendly before. We could keep it in this room. Never talk about it. We could be friends again."
There was a note of yearning in his voice and she wondered if he missed the easy companionship at lunch or late drinks in each other's office as much as she did. They never agreed on anything but it was good to have a friend to share things with.
"I have to hate you." she confessed. "I have to hate you or…"
Or she would fall apart.
Or fall into him.
But she wasn't sure the two weren't the same thing.
"I can't." he shrugged, drawing back a little, cupping her cheek… For a second, she thought he was going to kiss her. For a second, he probably thought about it. She wasn't sure what would have happened then. He licked his lips instead, his features schooling into that detached expression she hated. "What happened at the Council session… It can't happen again. You can't just attack me for the hell of it. The Ark has to come first. Our people have to come first."
"They always come first." she argued defensively, hurt that he would imply she would think otherwise.
"Then, let's keep it professional from now on, okay?" he asked, dropping his hands off her, stepping back…
She didn't understand how he could go from being Marcus to the Commander of the Guards so easily but she hated it. She hated that person he wanted to be so badly, the all powerful man who would control everything.
"No problem." she scowled, wiping her still wet cheeks with her sleeves, annoyed by what had just happened. Why had she let her guard down? She should have known better. She should have…
"I'm not your enemy, Abby." he said quietly, reaching for the door's handle. She stepped aside. "You can hate me all you want, I'll never be your enemy."
She wasn't sure that was true and she didn't acknowledge it in any way.
He seemed disappointed but he didn't comment on it.
He just left.
She closed her eyes, took a deep breath and reminded herself what the important thing was: find a way to save Clarke and the Ark. Everything else… Everything else was secondary to that.