Chapter 22
Eight years earlier. . .
Once Chloe buried herself in work, time began to pass. Passing so fast she would need to consult a calendar to even know what day it was. Her days would begin at nearly six in the morning and wouldn't end until an hour or two after midnight when she would drag herself home to a vegged out Retriever and a silent house. Most evenings were spent in the company of the League at Watchtower, setting up computer systems and security measures. When she wasn't with the League or working late at Isis, she was with Lois, nursing her through a bottle of Jack Daniels and a bad, but inevitable break-up, acting as a walking Thesaurus or calming the first date jitters. She lived on the occasional glazed donut followed by swallows and swallows of coffee, either too busy to sit to down and eat or too dang tired. For the first few weeks, Chloe felt fine, but the amount of work began to take it's toll. She wasn't sleeping like she used too and her appetite continued to wane. For the first time her in life, Chloe cut back on the caffeine. She limited herself to three cups in the morning to jumpstart her morning and hoped it would prove enough to get her through her long days. When kicking the latte addiction didn't work, she tried supplementing water, thinking she was dehydrated and she'd finally reached the age where it mattered what she put in her body. The first morning Chloe hovered over the toilet in the bathroom for ten minutes after two sips of coffee, she quit cold turkey.
"Maybe you should try eating," Lois finally suggested one day when Chloe met her for lunch.
"I'm just not hungry, Lois. Nothing seems appetizing or makes my stomach turn upside down," Chloe replied, pushing the chicken salad sandwich on toasted wheat bread she'd ordered away from her after only one nibble. "Plus, I don't know how with the daily bulimic sessions I'm having every morning in my bathroom, but I've gained about three pounds."
Lois stopped the last bite of her burger half way from her mouth. Chloe saw the look in her cousin's eyes and quickly shook her head, following her unspoken train of thought. "It's not that," she assured Lois.
"How do you know? Are you sure?" Lois fired back, putting down her burger and wiping her hands on a napkin. "When was you last-"
"A little over a month ago, right before he left, but Lois, it doesn't matter-"
"Like hell it doesn't matter! Did you use protection?"
Chloe laughed out loud at Lois' out-raged mother hen at her baby chick routine.
"Chloe, this isn't funny," Lois began seriously. "Clark left about a month ago. You've been tired, you have no appetite, you're throwing up in the mornings and you've gained weight. You put the pieces together, Dr. Spock."
"First of all, Lois, I still a few months left on my year long birth control prescription, so calm down," Chloe replied, just as seriously, knowing there was just simply no way she was pregnant. Especially by Clark Kent of all people. "Secondly, I'm probably just bloated and have no appetite because that time of the month is coming up. Cool down. I'd know if something was up, trust me."
The next night, a Friday, Chloe allowed Lois to coax her to go on a double date with a guy she'd met in Mayor's Office and the guy's old college room-mate. The whole time Chloe felt as if she was being unfaithful. Under the intense scrutiny of her cousin, Chloe made the acceptable small talk, sipped sparingly of her Merlot which made her feel like she was about to puke and forced down most of her grilled salmon. By the time she'd begged off and arrived back home, she felt horrible. Crawling into bed, not even having the strength to slip out of her cocktail dress, Chloe cradled her tummy and moaned, praying the pains would end. She felt sick, physically and emotionally. As an act of penance for her indiscretion toward Clark, Chloe reached out and grasped the Blue K bracelet from his nightstand and slipped it on. Instantly, the pains began to lessen. Chloe soon fell into a deep sleep, awaking the next morning feeling better than she had for the past two weeks. For the whole weekend, Chloe kept the bracelet on. She felt almost normal and actually ate a few bites of the spaghetti Mrs. Hubbard had dropped by a few nights ago.
A few more weeks passed. Whenever Chloe felt sick or tired, she would slip the bracelet and be right as rain. Her clothes began to tighten but Chloe attributed it to the no show of a certain friend and water retention. Pushing back a few of her clients in the morning, she began taking runs in the morning or doing crunches, hoping to find the elusive room in her clothes again. Her eating habits would swing from where she was craving almost everything in sight to where everything made her nauseous. She still hadn't touched coffee and was still abstaining, not wanting a repeat of the bathroom performances she seemed to have been reprieved from. When the two month mark of Clark's absence had passed and Chloe still hadn't returned to her regularly scheduled programming, she called her Doctor.
"Have you been sexually active recently, Ms. Sullivan?" Dr. Garmon asked.
"Well," Chloe hemmed, not wanting her doctor to think she was a one night kinda girl. "Yes, I have been," she told the woman.
"Give it a few more weeks. When a woman goes from being non-active to active it's not uncommon for it to upset her flow. If you would feel better, we can schedule you for an exam."
"No, that won't be necessary. Thank you, Dr. Garmon." Chloe shut her cell phone, an unexpected rush of relief flowing over her.
But that relief quickly vanished when the next month rolled around and still nothing. The morning sickness had returned and only wearing the bracelet one or two days didn't help it.
"Chloe, I think you need to take some time off," Oliver finally told her one day in Watchtower as he put her through some physical training paces she'd insisted on.
Chloe wiped the sweat from her brow and glared at the guy she'd come to view as an older brother despite the way they harmlessly flirted at times. "First you tell me to come back and bury myself in work. Now you tell me to take some time off? Make up your mind, Ollie."
"I mean it," Oliver brought their sparring to an end, not liking the paleness that was beginning to slip over Chloe right at that moment. "You look terrible."
"Thanks, Oliver. That's what every girl. . . wants to. . . hear. . ." Chloe fought for breath.
"Chloe?"
Before she knew what had happened, she found herself flat on her back, looking up at Oliver.
"What happened?" Chloe asked.
"I don't know. You just. . . fainted," Oliver told her with concern.
"I don't faint," Chloe countered.
"Well, you just did. Have you been eating? Bart mentioned he hardly ever sees you eat anything anymore," Oliver said, pulling Chloe into a sitting position very slowly.
Chloe's head spun crazily and she clung to Oliver for a few moments. "I eat. Just not a lot. I don't have much of an appetite these days."
"I want you to make an appointment with your Doctor, Chloe. Something is going on. You're fine one day and than sicker than a dog the next. I want you to get it checked out," Oliver demanded.
Chloe waved him away non-chalantly but vowed she would see her doctor before the week was up.
She made the appointment on a Thursday in the lunch hour. As had become their habit, Chloe and Lois would meet at either the Planet or Isis and go from there. On this day, Lois met Chloe outside the Doctor's office and accompanied her inside, flipping through the magazines and wagging her heel. When Chloe emerged, she was even paler than when she went in. Out on the sidewalk, Lois fluttered around her.
"Chloe, what's wrong? Is everything okay? What did the Doctor say? Come on, Chloe! I'm about to have a cow!"
Chloe broke Lois' hold on her arm, made a dash for the nearest waste receptacle and threw up. Ignoring the disgusted stares of many Metropolis pedestrians, Chloe wiped her mouth and turned around to face Lois who had followed her and rubbed her back soothingly.
"Honey," Lois cooed.
Chloe gazed at Lois, looking like a lost street urchin. Finally, with quiet panic, she said, "I'm pregnant."
"Pregnant? You're pregnant? How is that even possible?" Oliver questioned rapidly, pacing the length of the family room.
"I don't know, but I am. I think is has something to do with the bracelet. Maybe, but I'm not sure," Chloe replied haltingly. She sat perched on the edge of the sofa, a cup of untouched decaf tea steaming in front of her.
"What are you going to do?" Oliver asked with sympathy, taking a seat close to her.
"What do you think I'm going to do, Oliver?" Chloe responded angrily.
"That's not what I meant," Oliver snapped. "I just meant, I don't know what I meant." Oliver resumed pacing again.
"You're making me nervous, Oliver. Do you mind? You're acting like you're the expectant father."
"Are you going to tell Clark? How would you even get to Clark?" Oliver thought aloud as he sat down next to her.
"I've thought about that and I'm just going to wait for him to come home," Chloe said serenely. "All this would do is upset his training and then I'd have a majorly pissed off AI on my ass again and I don't want to go through that a second time."
Oliver turned to Chloe. Taking her hand in his and squeezing, he said, "I'll help you. Anything you need, I'm here for you."
"Thanks, Oliver."
The two sat in silence for a few minutes.
"What the hell are we going to tell the League? They'll expect Clark to be coming back."
"I'll take care of it," Oliver offered.
Chloe eyed him seriously. "How?"
"I don't know. I'll think of something," Oliver pulled Chloe close in an one arm hug. The two were startled when the front door flew open. Looking behind them, they saw Lois standing open mouthed in the doorway.
"Well," Lois started before assembling her features into a cool mask. "Clark's, huh?"
"Lois-" Chloe said urgently, standing to her feet and making her way over to Lois. "This isn't what it looks like."
Lois lifted a brow.
"Really, Lois," Oliver joined in. "Chloe and I are just friends."
"Sure," Lois said with blatant skepticism. "Because the two of you run in such similar social circles."
"Lois, Oliver and I are just friends. Nothing more."
Lois cracked under Chloe's earnest stare. She had the grace to look embarrassed. "Sorry," she muttered. "Knee jerk reaction. Little cousin dating the one who got away, jealousy and betrayal run rampant."
"I'll just be going," Oliver said uneasily. "See you two, later." Oliver ducked out, giving Lois one more lingering glance.
Lois shrugged off the encounter and smiled. "How are you feeling?"
"I just found out this afternoon I was pregnant, Lois. I don't know how I'm feeling yet," Chloe answered, sitting back down.
Lois made her way into the kitchen and poured herself a glass of lemonade. "Have you called him yet?" She called over her shoulder as she replaced the pitcher.
"Called who?"
Lois stalked back into the family room, glass in hand. "Um, hello? The Ross to your Rachel? Clark Kent, aka Baby Daddy."
Chloe squirmed under Lois' watchful gaze.
"Whoa there, Nelly," Lois blustered, setting her glass and not taking the time for a coaster. "You are going to tell him, right?"
"He's not really in a place where I can reach him," Chloe said truthfully.
"How is that possible in this day age? Unless he's somehow found himself up in Santa's Workshop, which by the way, still gets snail mail," Lois quipped
"Lois, five hours ago, my life changed. Excuse me if I'm still being a little self preoccupied right now," Chloe replied incredulously.
Lois blanched. "Sorry, sorry. How are you feeling?" She asked again.
Chloe rolled her eyes.
Chloe took some time off to think and plan and just be. For a few days, all she did was sit in the family room, sun streaming in the windows and Shelby at her feet. Since she found out, she'd refused to give in to the urge to rub her belly in the annoying way all pregnant women did. But now that Chloe was a pregnant woman, the gesture didn't seem so empty and attention-calling. Looking down at her still flat stomach, she wondered when it would start to grow. Hesitantly, looking around as if she was afraid someone would catch her, Chloe rested a hand over her navel. Part of her still didn't believe, still thought it was all a joke and she would wake up tomorrow and need to rush to the grocery store for a box of Tampax Pearl. By her doctor's calculations, she was fifteen weeks pregnant, already in her second trimester.
"It's perfectly normal. Most woman don't even know they're pregnant until the middle of the second trimester. You're ahead of schedule!" The nurse gushed. Chloe tried to smile back excitedly, but she wasn't there yet.
The fact that her baby was half-Kryptonian didn't faze her at first, but when she noticed she was more comfortable after sitting in the sun for a couple of hours or wearing the bracelet, she knew it was time to find a new doctor. Oliver's first and only choice was Dr. Emil.
"Looks like I've got a surprise for you," he said when she came in for her ultrasound.
Visions of a two headed Clark-baby swirled in her mind as Chloe tried to remain calm. "Surprise?" Chloe squeaked.
Dr. Emil replaced the wand along her belly. "Listen." He reached over and turned up the volume.
Chloe heard the steady lub-dub, lub-dub, lub-dub of her child's heartbeat.
"Do you hear it?"
Chloe listened closer. Suddenly, she heard two lub-dubs.
"Is that-?"
"Yep," Dr. Emil confirmed. "Looks like you're going to have twins, Chloe. Do you want to know what they are?"
"You can tell already?"
"Pretty much. Do you want to know?"
Chloe nodded, unable to speak.
"Male," Dr. Emil said after another quick look at the screen. "You're having twin boys."
Chloe continued to grow. Everywhere. Her breasts doubled in size, which wasn't so bad but so did her hips. Her belly keep getting rounder and rounder until it entered a room five minutes before she did. She adapted a waddle, due to the fact her thighs no longer touched and she lived in pink house slippers. Oliver and Martha and Lois became ever-present in her life, each one spending at least two or three days with Chloe around the clock when she went on maternity leave. As her due date approached, all watched her like a balloon ready to pop. Lois, who'd finally been promoted, got picked up to go on the campaign trail for a politician. With a remorseful good-bye, Chloe breathed a sigh of relief, not wanting to explain to Lois why she was a month past her due date with no babies in sight.
And finally, on the day their father had been gone for a year, Connor Joseph and Jonathon Kincaid made their appearance.
With surprising ease, Chloe made it through the first year as a single mother. Connor and Kaid were the center focus of her life. She would lug them to work with her and to Watchtower meetings, the Leaguers always ready to cuddle and burp and feed the growing boys. No one spoke of paternity, although all suspected that the boys were Oliver's and he never denied it. Only Oliver and Lois knew. As the boys first birthday approached, Chloe became more nervous. As with all new parents, she planned a birthday party with only close friends and family invited. Her dad flew down to spend a few days with the family before heading back where he lived in Baltimore near to her mother's hospital.
The day was perfect. It was sunny and warm and Connor and Kaid, being one year old, were on their best behavior. But Chloe wasn't all there. She kept looking around her, gazing at the horizon. She snapped pictures and served cake and punch, but Oliver could see she was growing continually more flustered. The day began winding down, guests leaving with the setting of the sun. As night fell, Lois and Oliver helped Chloe clean up as she stood at the door looking out. Connor and Kaid rolled on a rug, their attention caught by the new, shiny punch and play Lois had bought them. A month passed and then another and then another. Chloe slipped into a melancholy state. She called into work, skipped League meetings and would sit Connor and Kaid in the play pen in her room and lay in bed.
After the third League meeting Chloe missed, Oliver drove out to the Farm. Furniture was gathering dust and dishes were collecting. He heard Connor and Kaid crying and followed the sad sound. He found them, Connor and Kaid in the play pen, holding onto the sides as they stood . Chloe was curled up in bed. Oliver picked both boys up. They hadn't been neglected, but Oliver knew that Chloe usually didn't use the pen as a baby-sitter. Changing their diapers and then putting them in the cribs that were stuffed into Clark's room, Oliver went back into Chloe's bedroom. Sitting on the bed, Oliver shook her, jolting her awake.
Chloe glared at him. "What?"
"What do you think you're doing?" Oliver asked.
"I was sleeping," she snapped.
"It's five o'clock in the evening, Chloe. You missed another meeting. Connor and Kaid are screaming because they're hungry and you're in bed. What are you doing?"
"Leave me alone, Oliver," Chloe growled, pulling the covers over her head.
"No," Oliver said sternly, yanking the covers down again. "You didn't just shrivel up and stop living because Clark left the first time, did you? Why should you now?"
Chloe sat up and looked at him, her eyes, usually sparkling and full of joy, were dead. "I wanted to. But someone wouldn't leave me the hell alone," she snarled.
"Well, it's not just about you now, is it? You've got two babies that need you. And I'll be damned if I'm going to see you give up on life just because Clark is gone."
Chloe's chin began to quiver. Oliver reached out and stroked a strand of hair behind Chloe's ear.
"Besides, he's not really gone, is he? He's in the next room," Oliver told her quietly.
Chloe put her head to Oliver's chest and cried.
"I need you're help, Oliver," Chloe said one day while the two of them were washing dishes after dinner.
Oliver turned and looked at Chloe. Another year had come and gone and still no Clark. He followed her gaze over his shoulder and watched newly three year old Connor and Kaid wrestling on the floor, Shelby barking and nipping excitedly around them.
"What Chloe?"
"I'm going to go find Clark," she told him simply.
Oliver almost dropped a glass. "What?"
"I'm going to go find Clark." Chloe shut off the water.
"I heard you the first time, Chloe. How do you think you're going to do this? You said yourself you didn't know where he was," Oliver pointed out.
"No, but Jor-El does," Chloe replied, drying the remainder of the dishes as Oliver stared at her.
"And just how do you propose to get a hold of ole' ice encrusted Grandaddy?"
"I'm going to go up to the Fortress and ask. Who knows, Clark may be there by now."
"Chloe," Oliver started. "I don't think that-"
"He should have been back by now. It's been four years. He could be hurt somewhere or trapped."
"If Clark is hurt or trapped somewhere, I doubt he would want you getting involved!" Oliver exclaimed.
"My mind is made up, Oliver. You can come with me or I can go alone. Either way, I'm going."
Chloe took Oliver's hand as she slipped the key into it's slot. Dressed in their warmest arctic clothes, the unearthly bright light surrounded them and suddenly, they were standing a ways away from a vast icy erection. Oliver shook his head and squinted against the bright sunlight bouncing off the white snow. Chloe set her shoulders.
"Come on," she said before she began trudging toward the Fortress.
The walk was staggering. Oliver and Chloe pulled their coats closer and mittens tighter. Oliver fought the urge to lick his already chapped lips. An eternity later, they finally stood looking up at the stories high Fortress. Chloe strode forward, calling for Clark. Oliver looked around him, taking in the pillars and daises, a regular ice castle.
When Chloe got no response from Clark, she started calling for Jor-El. No answer for ten minutes and Chloe was hoarse from yelling.
"Chloe, no one's home obviously," Oliver said. He didn't feel uneasy here but he sure didn't feel welcomed either.
"He's here. He's just being stubborn. Jor-El!"
Oliver jumped when a disembodied male voice shook the inside.
"Can I help you?"
Oliver would have laughed had he been able to see where the voice was speaking from. He turned around and around and finally glanced Chloe standing in front of some sort of crystal console as it glowed.
"Kal-El, where is he?" Chloe asked with preamble.
"What business of it is yours?"
The voice sounded irritated and Oliver waited for a bolt of lightning.
Chloe bristled. "I need to know where you son is, Jor-El. I have to know if Clark is safe. What have you done with him?" Chloe accused.
"I have done nothing with him. You should not have come here. You have no place in this Fortress. Kal-El always neglected his Kryptonian destiny due to you humanly interference."
Chloe blinked away tears. "Please, Jor-El," she pleaded, changing tactics. "I just want to know where he is, if he's safe. I have to know. Please tell me where Clark is."
The structure seemed to sigh around them. "The Clark Kent you seek no longer exists." And like a candle in the wind, the console went out.
Chloe stood unmoving and then with a piercing scream began kicking the ice with the tip of her steel-toed boot. "That is not an answer! Tell me where Clark is now!"
Oliver hurried over and bodily picked Chloe up, carrying her backward as she struck out blindly. "Do you really want to anger the man behind the curtain, Chloe?" Oliver asked in a huff.
Chloe stumbled away from him and landed on her knees a few feet from the console. "He can't be gone, Oliver," she whispered. "He just can't be. No matter what the Great Wizard of the Arctic says."
"I forgot how nice it was to see a movie without two squirming children in tow," Chloe said as she walked along beside Oliver from the Metropolis Multiplex.
"And without any talking animals," Oliver added.
"Still having nightmares about suburbanite rodents stealing your beer cooler?" Chloe teased.
Oliver chuckled. He slipped a companionable arm around Chloe shoulders as the two made their way toward the Met Stop around the corner. They walked along in comfortable silence. As always, Chloe's mind would bring forth images of movies she'd seen with Clark and the friendly silences that would stretch between them as they walked back to his truck. Quickly, Chloe pushed them away, feeling guilty for thinking of Clark while on a date with Oliver.
They had begun dating almost a year ago, two years after the trip to the Fortress to find Clark.
"Chloe, how long are you going to put your life on hold waiting for Clark?" Oliver had asked one night when they had both stayed late at Watchtower.
Chloe lifted her head from some transmission patterns she was trying to break. "What do you mean?"
Oliver sighed. He pushed himself out of the recliner and walked over to her, standing closer than he normally did. "It's been six years, Chloe. It's time to move on."
Chloe stiffened. "I'm not putting my life on hold, Oliver. You know I don't have time for a relationship with all that I do. And who wants to date a woman who is usually covered with crayola markers and has 'Goodnight Moon' memorized?"
Oliver rolled his eyes. He'd always liked Chloe and he knew she was lonely. So was he. And like the practical business man he was, he approached the idea from all angles.
"I would," Oliver told her simply.
"Oliver," Chloe started.
"Just give me a chance, Chloe," Oliver said hurriedly. "We keep the same hours. We know who the other really is. I know about Connor and Kaid. You're my best friend. We're both not interested in relationship based on romance and passion."
"Wow, Oliver. You just swept me off my feet," Chloe replied sarcastically.
Oliver grinned. "You know we'd be good together."
"Oliver, I like you. You are. . ." Chloe trailed off. "I can't ever think of an adjective to describe how much you mean to me. And I can't argue with your reasoning. But the same reasons you mentioned could be our undoing. We work together. You're my best friend, too. You are very close to my kids. And while you and I together makes sense, have you though about what Lois would think of all this?"
"If I talk to her, will you think about it?" Oliver asked softly, taking Chloe's hands in his own.
Chloe curled her hands into Oliver's. She'd always found him attractive, but her heart would always belong to Clark. "I'll always love Clark," she told him truthfully.
Oliver didn't even blink. "I know that. How many times have we both sat up here complaining about how lonely both of us are? Chloe, I think you're sexy as hell. The way you are with your sons, how you manage Isis and Watchtower and that you can hack a firewall in sixty seconds flat. I would like to think you aren't immune to me, as well." Oliver's eyes twinkled as Chloe blushed prettily. "One date. That's all I'm asking."
"One date," Chloe agreed. "But only if Lois gives her blessing."
"She already has."
"What?"
"Come on, Chloe," Oliver laughed. "You know me better than that. I always come prepared to win."
That night, when Chloe relieved Lois of baby-sitting duty, she had her own in-depth discussion about Oliver with her cousin. After Lois assured Chloe she was fine with the change in status between Chloe and Oliver and she'd left, Chloe put her sons to bed. Once shut in her own room, she sat on the edge of her bed. With a deep breath, she opened the drawer of her new nightstand. Inside was a pretty cut glass box about the size of a fist. Chloe took it out carefully. Taking the lid off and laying it aside, Chloe reached in and pulled out the bracelet.
It had been six years since Clark left and not a word. She'd gone to Fortress one more time without Oliver. Jor-El hadn't even spoken to her. She'd tried to wander around but every time she got close to another section of the Fortress a strong arctic wind would blow, nearly knocking her to her feet. Oliver was right. Who knew when Clark would come back. And she was lonely. More lonely than when Clark left. It was time. Time to move on. Bringing the rock to her lips, Chloe kissed it fleetingly before finding an empty shoe box in the closet and putting it safely inside. Standing on her tiptoes, she pushed it back to where she could barely see it. With tears in her eyes, she closed the door and a chapter of her life.
Chloe jumped as a hand was laid on her shoulder, startling her out of her past.
"Sorry, sweetie," Martha said. She placed a cup of hot chocolate next to Chloe before taking a seat on the stool next to her. She leaned in close and looked at the screen of Chloe's laptop. She pulled back with sad eyes. "You still haven't changed your mind?"
"No," Chloe shook her head. "I think it's for the best."
"Try again. Please, try again."
"I have," Chloe said. "I have sent him emails, I have left him long voicemails, I even wrote him a letter. He's either ignored them all or has read and is still choosing to stay away."
"But why this?" Martha asked, gesturing to the screen.
"My reasons for staying no longer exist. We need a fresh start. I need a fresh start. Plus, it's closer to my parents. And we're closer to Washington, too."
Martha shook her head, refusing to see the positives of Chloe leaving Smallville, of leaving Clark. "And there's nothing I can do to change your mind?"
Chloe smiled sadly. "Afraid not. I've made up my mind. I've already found a house very close to where my dad lives."
"How soon are you leaving?" Martha asked, looking at the Tudor style home on a smaller scale on the screen of the laptop.
"Day after Christmas."
"That's in less two weeks!" Martha exclaimed. "Have you told Clark?"
"I told him in the letter I wrote him. I haven't heard anything."
"Then he doesn't know. Chloe, Clark would not let you leave. You have to go to him, face to face."
"I've tried!" Chloe said with frustration. "Look, Martha," Chloe amended gently. "He's made his choice. It's time for us all to move on."
"I can't imagine this is his choice," Martha argued. "Clark wouldn't give up his children! He wouldn't give you up. I know he loves you!"
Chloe pressed her mouth into a thin line. With swift decisiveness, she emailed the listing to her realtor along with an offer on the house. She looked over at Martha who was staring agape at what Chloe had just done, cementing her move.
Chloe met Martha's tear-filled eyes unwaveringly. "Sometimes love isn't enough."