Emma Swan
"First of all, you're leaving our trio? And second of all, you honestly think it's a good idea to move in together when she's so clearly in love with you?" Ruby quipped as I stared blankly in shock, because I was baffled at her accusation.
"Regina's not in love with me."
"Oh please! She's only comfortable around you. She spends practically every night over here, doing everything and anything you want. Not to mention how she stares at you with such adoration," Ruby rolled her eyes at me but I still wasn't buying what she had to offer.
"Belle?" I asked seeking a second opinion.
"Well she's not the only one, we can tell you love her too," she admitted provoking my stomach to start doing backflips at the thought of Regina Mills being in love with me.
"We are just friends," I defended.
"And we are so sick of hearing that. Just tell her how you feel before you go through with this," Ruby suggested a little calmer than she was a few moments ago.
"No, I'm not going to put any added pressure on the situation. I'm lucky enough that she's offering her house and two extra bedrooms to us."
"Let's be honest, it will only be one room for Henry. You're going to stay in her bed every night." I furrowed my eyebrows and shook my head in denial.
"Anyways..." I wanted nothing more than to change this subject because I would give anything to be with Regina but I know it's not in the cards for us. "...Belle it's been like six months, when are we meeting this guy?" She sighed and bit her lower lip, expressing her anguish about her current relationship.
"Alright, if I let you guys meet him, promise me there will be no judgement," she sternly demanded.
Ruby barked out an obnoxious laugh. "Judgement? From who? The lesbian or the girl who's knocked up with her ex's baby and sleeping with her best friend?" I groaned at her admission and covered my face from the embarrassment that is my life.
"My life is so fucked up right now."
Ruby continued with her awful hackling, "Yeah it really is."
"Thanks!" I shot sarcastically causing all three of us girls to laugh out loud.
"Alright, this weekend I will invite him over."
"Can we get a name for right now?" I asked.
"Nah, its better this way," Belle replied, before heading to her bedroom, leaving us behind.
XXXXXXXXX
It's no wonder why Belle was apprehensive about bringing around her boyfriend. Robert Gold is a professor at the university we attended and he's a good twenty years older than us. I have no right to judge their life while I'm secretly in love with my best friend and continue sleeping with her when I'm straight.
Well I guess I'm not straight anymore.
Robert seemed nice enough though. He has been married before, with a son and is now divorced. Belle said she hasn't met his son yet but is nervous because they are close in age. Awkward. Either way I support her decision because she clearly loves him enough to stay with him and she's never liked anyone enough to even date.
I officially moved in with Regina two weeks ago and it has been wonderful. We are closer than ever in which I have a love hate relationship with our...whatever it is that we are. I love how close we are. I love how much she loves my son already. I love how everything she does is for my best interest. Then comes the hate. I hate that I can't grow a pair of balls and just ask her where we are. I hate that every time she looks at me she looks just as conflicted as I feel. I hate the idea of actually making her mine and losing her one day, just like Neal. I don't think I could stand that type of heart ache again.
Regina forced me out of the house today, despite my childlike protest. She insists exercise is good for me and the baby. Where I insist eating all day is good for us. So, she bribed me with some of my favorite ice cream at the small shop we always go to. As we ate our ice cream she guided me toward a path around the lake.
When we finished walking two laps we made our way back to the townhouse. I was so thankful to see our townhouse I practically kissed the disgusting sidewalk just outside the doorway. My ankles were starting to swell, and my lower back was stiff and aching.
I groaned and complained like a spoiled brat until we entered our home in which I was instantly greeted with a bunch of overly excited faces. I froze momentarily when I discovered Ruby, her Granny, Belle and Zelena all inside.
"What are you guys all doing here?" I asked in surprise. I leaned against the door and began prying my swollen feet out of my sweaty shoes.
"Well this is kind of like your baby shower. It's not much but we all wanted to show our support," Belle informed me as she wrapped me into a loving hug. My bottom lip pouted out into a frown as I tried to fight back my tears.
Damn hormones.
"I'm so happy you are all here. Thank you for all your love and support during this time."
I barely made my words out before Ruby engulfed me into one of her over enthusiastic hugs, followed by her Granny and then Zelena.
"Come sit, we have some adorable gifts we can't wait for you to open!" Ruby exclaimed dragging me into the living room with a contagious smile.
For a moment, I allowed all my fears and reservations about having this baby to drift away. My friends, who are the only family I have were being so supportive that I couldn't allow my negative thoughts to ruin this day.
I sat down with a giddy grin as they all handed me baby blue bags filled to the top with baby stuff. I have never felt so loved than in this moment and I feel like maybe I can do this.
I opened each gift with the constant sound of everyone's cooing surrounding me. Every time my girls gasped a sweet awwww, my eyes filled to the brim with tears. I'm not sure if it's just my hormones raging or maybe the special bond I'm feeling with my baby, either way all this love is a little overwhelming for me.
"I think you have enough clothes and diapers for the first six months," Granny laughed as she cleaned up all the wrapping paper.
I really did, my girls bought every size of clothes and diapers. Along with pacifiers, bibs, bottles and blankets. I just have to purchase the bigger stuff now, like a crib, swing, car seat and high chair.
"Thank you so much girls for coming out, this means the world to me!" I smiled and fought back my insistent tears once again.
I quickly turned my attention to a fluffy baby blue blanket with a monkey embroidered into the material. I ran my hand over the fabric to avoid everyone's intense gaze upon me.
"Thank Regina, she called us all over," Zelena announced catching my attention.
"Excuse me," I softly said as I stood from the couch and made my way to the kitchen.
Regina was in the kitchen cutting the cake she bought that was decorated in baby blue icing with everything baby all over it. I stopped in the doorway, examining the brunette as she cut up the cake and placed each piece on to a plate, followed by a fork and napkin to go along with it. As she finished the last piece, she scooped a piece of frosting from the knife with her index finger, sucking it into her mouth. She must've felt me staring because she stilled her actions as her big brown eyes glanced up through her long eyelashes.
"You're adorable," I smiled as I walked toward her. She finished licking her finger and quickly placed the knife into the sink. I shoved my hands into my back pockets feeling extremely emotional from this baby shower. "Thank you!"
She spun back around abruptly and leaned against the sink. "For what dear?"
"For inviting everyone over, for my cake, my presents, this roof over my head, Henry's nursery...everything!"
"No need to thank me, that's what friends are for." She shrugged her shoulders as if this was all part of her daily routine. I wonder if she actually hears me when I do say thank you.
"Right, about that," I took a step closer enclosing the space between us.
Those brown orbs were burning right through to my soul, igniting my body with heat. I wanted to kiss those full lips, but we never show any type of affection in front of other people. We are strictly friends when we are in public, even though our friends know we hook up. Regina tore me from my thoughts, when she licked her lips silently begging me to kiss them.
Fuck it!
I gripped the back of her neck and pulled her blood red lips to mine. Passion built wildly between us as we moved in sync with one another. An electrical spark zapped through my stomach and down to my core, leaving me wet for more. I whimpered the second her tongue slipped inside my mouth.
"Eh-em," someone cleared their throat rather loudly causing Regina and I to break our kiss and fumble backwards.
"Just wondering where our cake was..." Zelena sheepishly suggested as she made her way to the plates already prepared with cake.
"Sorry, we were just getting them together," Regina stated as she grabbed a couple plates to pass out.
"Were you looking for the cake in Emma's mouth?" I felt my cheeks flush as Regina groaned.
"Zelena, don't start," and with that she was out of the kitchen. I wanted to talk to her about us, but my stupid hormones stepped in the way.
"Emma," Zelena cautiously said, tearing my mind away from my wandering thoughts. With one index finger she pointed to her bottom lip. Then she chuckled to herself and made a swift motion circling around her lips. I furrowed my eyebrows for a second a little confused by her actions. Then it clicked, and I quickly ran the back of my sleeve across my lips. "You might want to use some water and a napkin to scrub my sister's lipstick from your mouth."
I gulped down my nerves but I'm sure my cheeks were a dead giveaway to my embarrassment. They are already pulsating with a burning heat that's causing my hairline to grow moist with perspiration.
"Uh-" I choked on my words as I scrambled to come up with something. "Um, thanks."
Zelena flashed me a wicked grin as she picked up a few plates and left the kitchen without another word. I sighed in relief the moment she was gone.
I followed her instructions and wet a paper towel and began scrubbing away at my lips. I know I need to talk to Regina about my feeling but I'm terrified of losing her. I thought Neal and I were made for each other and we would spend the rest of our lives together but that didn't happen.
I should just keep my mouth shut and be thankful for what I have.