Emma Swan

I settled into my small, one-bedroom studio in Boston. It's taken me some time to grow accustomed to the size, considering the place I had before with Ruby and Belle, and then the townhouse with Regina.

I'm working as an assistant for a foster system, while I'm still attending school for my masters. I mostly just handle filing paperwork and answering phones. I'm simply paying my dues because one day, I want to be able to place children with loving foster families. I don't ever want someone to fear their child won't be taken care of, like I did when I was thinking about putting Henry up for adoption.

My days consist of work, school and minimal sleep. Even if I have a day off and time to rest, I can't sleep. Henry and Regina are always on my mind. It's been almost a year since I left, and I can't help but wonder how big he is now. I constantly dream about how he probably interacts with Regina and how much she loves him.

They are both better off without me.

My eyes scan over each piece of mail that I flip rapidly through. Every time I check my mail, my heart flutters with hope, that maybe there will be something about him. I have no reason to feel this way. Regina owes me nothing in life except maybe a free ride to an electric chair for the damage I've caused.

"Are you Emma Swan?"

My head snapped up to find a boy watching me carefully. He must have been around the age of fourteen, so I glanced around looking for a parent or someone older, who should be looking after this boy.

"Yes," I hesitantly confirmed.

"This is for you," he smiled up at me with a goofy grin and handed me a blank envelope.

I snatched the offered mail from the boy, flashing him a quizzical look in the process. My finger sliced through the paper as I ripped the envelope open. I narrowed my eyes at the teenager once again before I peered down into the envelope. My eyes doubled in size when I saw nothing but one hundred-dollar bills lined up. My head shot up, but the kid was already strutting away.

"Hey kid! Where did you get this?"

The boy slowly turned around, he simply shrugged his shoulders with a wide smile and then ran off down the street.

I slammed my tiny mailbox shut and ran upstairs to my apartment. I tossed everything down as soon as I stumbled inside. I hurried to my kitchen and sat down at my counter.

I pulled out all the neat, crisp, one hundred-dollar bills and began to count. When I reached the center of the stack I found a note, but I pushed the piece of paper aside and continued to count not wanting to lose my train of thought.

I sat back in my stool and gasped at the piles of money before me. Five grand. Five thousand dollars, sitting on my kitchen counter. I picked up the note and tapped the paper against the counter, working up my courage to see who on Earth could've sent me this kind of money.

When curiosity got the best of me, I unfolded the paper and read the note.

My Emma,

I told you not a day would go by that I wouldn't think of you. I'm so sorry for messing up our lives. I have to find a new place to live but before I go I thought you could use some help. I always want to help you and be there even if I physically can't. I hope this can help with rent or classes, whatever you need. I will always love you!

Love,

Neal

I read the letter over and over again. He always loved leaving little letters for me to find. I sat back and nervously fiddled with the note.

How the hell did he find out where I am currently living?

I pulled my phone from my back pocket and called Ruby immediately. With each ring blaring on the other side of the line, my heart tightly constricted causing me to wince in pain. My body erupted with heat, like hot lava spewing wildly from the top of the volcano. I brushed my hair to one side in a lame attempt to cool down my neck.

"Hello?"

"Hey," I cleared my throat and tried my best to relax. She was silent, refusing to reply to me. I know she still hates me for leaving. "Um, did you give Neal my new address by any chance?"

"No. Why?" Her tone was short and snippy forcing me to deflate from my own embarrassment.

I miss my best friend.

"Well some kid showed up at my new place and handed me an envelope with five grand inside. Along with a note from Neal," I explained in a shaky breath out of fear from what she might say to me.

"No, you said the address was for Henry only," she simply stated.

"Right," I paused because I knew what she would already say to the question that's lingering at the forefront of my mind. "How is he?" I nervously tapped Neal's note against the counter while I held my breath.

"If you want to know then you need to call Regina," the same thing she always says.

"Right," I sighed and wondered if I should even bother with asking a favor, but I knew I needed to at least try.

Both ends were uncomfortably silent for a moment while I debated with my next question. I'm sure she was having her own debate, whether or not she wants to rip into me all over again for leaving them behind.

"Rubes?"

"Yes."

"I'm going to send you the money. Can you please give it to Regina for Henry? Maybe she could use it for food or diapers. Maybe even hold on to it for college one day."

College. An overwhelming sensation of joy filled my heart at the thought of Henry attending college one day and he will with Regina as his mother.

Ruby blew out a long and slow breath, dragging out my anticipation for her answer.

"Yeah I can do that."

"Thank you so much!" I squealed with excitement.

XXXXXXXXX

It's his birthday, so I bought a small chocolate cupcake with blue frosting, because what kid wouldn't want chocolate. I placed a small candle that's molded into the number one, in the center of the cupcake. I lit the candle and began singing softly to myself.

"Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday dear Henry. Happy birthday to you."

A few tears slowly trickled down my cheeks, but I brushed them away, refusing to spoil this moment in honor of my son.

"I hope you are having a wonderful day my sweet boy. I know you are surrounded by the ones that mean the most to you and I know they all love you very much."

My eyes fluttered closed, forcing a few more tears to slide down my face. I took a deep breath and blew out the candle, wishing nothing but the best for Henry.

I slowly peeled my eyes open and watched as the smoke rose sporadically into the air. The grey fog disappeared into nothing as time went on. I don't ever want my baby boy to evaporate from my memories as time progresses.

Ruby nor Belle will tell me anything about my son. I'm done not knowing. I can't go back just yet, but I need to see him. I rush to my closet and rip my jacket from my hanger. I snatch my keys from the bowl next to my door and rush to my car without a second thought.

I drive from Boston to Maine in record time. I honestly don't know what I'm expecting to do. I can't just knock on Regina's door and ask to see Henry, but dear god, I need to see him. I need to see her. My mind was just picturing what Henry might look like now and what Regina might be wearing the entire four-hour trip.

I park just outside her townhouse. It's late and I'll probably have to wait until tomorrow to see them. So, I recline my seat the slightest bit and pull my jacket closer to my body to keep warm. Just then I see Regina stepping outside. I shoot forward in my seat and gaze out my window at the two. Henry is securely placed on her hip while she locks the front door.

When she turns around, I lose all the air within my lungs. She's absolutely stunning. More than my memories allowed me to remember. I can't really see the details of Henry's face, but I know his hair is the same color brown as Neal's.

She is smiling at Henry and scrunching up her nose while speaking animated to him. He's giggling at his mother and staring at her like she's the most amazing thing to walk this planet.

She is my son and so are you.

I watch in fascination as she buckles him into his car seat and makes her way to the driver's side. I quickly glance down at my clock, not wanting to miss a thing and note it's eight o'clock in the evening.

Where the hell is she taking him?

She backs out of her driveway and slowly pulls away. I try to be discreet as I start my engine and follow her.

Great...now I'm a stalker.

She pulls up to the hometown ice cream parlor and my heart skips a beat. I park my car behind a large truck because my bright neon yellow car sticks out like a sore thumb and she would notice me right away.

I lean my seat back and peek out of my window. She pulls Henry out of his seat and kisses the tip of his nose. He giggles in response before he cuddles into his mother's chest. Regina holds him close with both hands and shuts his door with her foot, so she doesn't have to let him go for one second.

My eyes fill with tears, but I fight them away. She's an amazing mother and this only solidifies that I made the right choice.

The ice cream shop should be closed...

Regina knocks lightly on the door and tickles Henry as she waits for someone to answer. A young boy opens the door and gestures for Regina and Henry to enter. I watch through the window as Regina gazes at her son with pure adoration while he points to a flavor of ice cream. She smiles, and I can't tell, because I'm so far away, but she wipes her eyes as though she's crying.

I don't dare look away. My eyes are glued onto the two loves of my life. I'm biting my thumb subconsciously as my anxious nerves begin to claw at the back of my mind. I want nothing more than to walk in there and celebrate with them, but I can't. It's too soon. I need to finish my degree. There's far too much stuff in my life that I'm trying to work out right now and neither one needs to be dragged into this mess of mine. They are happy without me and that's what I wanted for Henry and Regina.