Emma Swan
I began turning around when I heard her ask, "Isn't that..."
I cut her off immediately, "Yes, it is."
"And that's..."
"Yes," I exhaled knowing all too well who they are. I'm not an idiot, I knew they would be here. They are always here every Friday night. Ruby is the one that's in the dark about it all.
I glare at my friend from across the booth as I'm finding it rather difficult to breathe. It's like all the oxygen has been sucked from this room and I'm fighting for my life here. I don't understand why Ruby is acting stupid, I know damn well when I left that her and Belle stayed in contact with Regina and Henry. They wouldn't tell me a thing about Henry. They always told me to ask Regina, which I never had the courage to do. So, when they wouldn't give me answers I decided to drive back every so often and see if I could spot Regina and Henry around town.
I know Regina takes Henry to Granny's every Friday to visit the older woman. I know every year for his birthday they go out alone at night to get Rocky Road. My favorite ice cream which clearly my son inherited from me.
I have been back in town for two months now but haven't reached out to Regina. I'm terrified what she will say or do. I deserve a death sentence, I'm fully aware of this but I still need to speak with her. I need to apologize, and I need her to understand why I've stayed away for so long.
"Why are you playing dumb? I know you know who they are," I declare while turning around to face my friend.
"This is an awkward situation to say the least."
"I know you and Belle stayed in touch with them."
"Well obviously, did you think I was just going to ab-" Ruby abruptly cuts herself off and falls completely silent.
"Go ahead! Say it. Abandon him, like I did."
"I'm not getting into this again. It was five years ago." Ruby huffs out her annoyance and scans over the menu as a simple distraction. It's her grandmother's restaurant for crying out loud, that menu has been embedded into her head since she was five years old. "Have you talked to her since you moved back?" I flash her my best unamused look because I know she knows the answer already.
"If I had, you would have known about it," I deadpan.
"The longer you wait, the harder it's going to be. Not to mention the angrier she will become for you not saying you're back." I groan while deflating back into me seat. I keep my eyes focused on the menu in front of me, not finding the guts to look my friend in the eyes. Ruby finally rips the menu out from under my face. "Go, now!" She snaps while pointing over my shoulder.
I breathe out a shaky breath and stumble out of the booth. My hands were already slick with anxious sweat. My mouth filling with salvia, signaling that I might throw up all over this diner. My legs turn into Jell-O, portraying me to be some baby deer learning to walk for the first time.
Regina has her back toward me while she is bending down, tying Henry's shoe. I swallow hard before I attempt speaking. I open my mouth, but nothing comes out. My heart thumps angrily in my chest, but I clench my fists together and try again. I open my mouth once more...nothing. Henry slowly lifts his head from watching his mother and our eyes lock. My heart sinks.
God he's beautiful.
His brown hair is neatly cut but is gently tossed around. His green eyes match mine with little golden specks. I want to kiss his nose that is filled with tiny freckles. His smile, his smile instantly steals all the air from my lungs. I feel l tears rapidly building but I fight them back yet again. We both cautiously inspect each other and then his smile grows wider.
"Hi," he greets me, showing his white baby teeth that are still intact.
Regina whips around abruptly to find out who her son is speaking with. Those familiar, big chocolate orbs double with surprise as she scans my body. I feel the old flame inside of me ignite provoking my heart to brutally attack my chest. She slowly rises with such elegance despite her high heels. The woman steps behind her son and pulls Henry closer into her legs.
"Hi," my voice cracks on the simple little word prompting my cheeks to flush crimson.
I bite down on my lip trying to fight the tears away. She doesn't say one word back, we just stare at one another. I try to express my sorrow while her eyes were challenging, daring me to speak one word and confirm just how much of an idiot I truly am.
I take advantage of our silence to assess the woman that stands before me today. Is she the same woman from all those years ago? Well, she looks the same. Maybe her hair is a little shorter? Her eyes do seem darker, like maybe they are a little wiser.
"Mommy? Do you know her?" Henry asks stretching his neck up toward Regina, full of curiosity.
She smiles down upon him, her face softening as she speaks to her son with tenderness. "I used to."
"I'm Henry!" He pokes out his hand with excitement, but I notice the way Regina squeezes his little shoulders.
"I'm Emma, nice to meet you," I happily introduce myself while I accept his little hand.
The warmth of his touch spreads rapidly through my skin. A sudden urge fills my body and I want nothing more than to reach down and hold him in my arms like I did so many years ago.
"What are you doing here?" Regina snaps, bursting the small bubble Henry and I created.
"I, uh," I glance down at Henry and offer him a weak smile, "I just moved back here."
"I see."
"I was wondering if maybe we could talk?"
"Excuse me?" Her voice is dripping with disdain causing me to recoil.
The hate is evident in her eyes. I can clearly see the way she wants to light my ass on fire. Just then a scruffy looking man with sandy blonde hair approaches. I cock my head to the side as he places his hand upon Regina's shoulder, slightly startling her.
"Hey darling," he whispers while placing a soft kiss to her lips, "is everything alright over here?" It didn't go unnoticed the way Regina stiffened from the interaction. Yet, she still smiled sweetly at the man and nodded. "Well why don't Henry and I wait outside while you finish up in here?" He suggests before kneeling down in front of Henry.
The man covers his hand around Henry's and escorts him out the door. Motherly instincts were on high alert, but I have no right to feel this way anymore. I gave up that right, but apparently my mouth completely forgot about that small detail.
"Is Henry alright with him?"
"Oh no! You don't get to come in here and start demanding to know things about my son. Do you honestly think I would let Henry walk off with a stranger?"
"That's not-"
"What do you want, Miss Swan? Why are you here?"
"I just wanted to let you know I'm back in town. I'm not going anywhere and I would love if we could catch up."
"Catch up? Just like that? I don't hear from you in five years and I'm just supposed to pretend this is all okay?"
"No, of course not! You're getting this all wrong. I'm sorry, I'm very nervous," I rush out as I begin wringing my fingers together while my eyes cast down to the floor from my embarrassment.
Out of my peripheral vision I can see her arms folding protectively across her chest. Her heel is tapping murderously against the cheap tile below. She's a lot more formal than she once was and it's scaring the crap out of me.
The soft bell above the door rings quietly exposing Henry, who is charging toward us with a smile on his face. The stranger is following closely behind the rambunctious five-year-old.
"Mommy, you said we could get ice cream! Let's go!" Henry enthusiastically turns his attention toward me, "you can come to Emma, since you know my mommy."
"No Henry, Emma has to get back to..." Regina glances over my shoulder and she must spot Ruby sitting in the booth behind me. Henry instantly follows his mother's gaze.
"Auntie Ruby!" He squeals as he takes off running to her table.
"I'm sorry darling he just wouldn't stay outside."
"It's quite alright dear. I know how crazy he can get about his ice cream," she smirks inspiring my heart to take off running.
"I'm Robin and you are..." the stranger holds out his hand politely, so I accept the gesture.
"Emma," I reply with a smile, but his face falls as his eyebrows scrunch together.
"Emma? As in Emma Swan?" He questions.
"Robin! Henry is right there, he doesn't need to hear that name," Regina spits coldly.
"My apologies. Well I can understand why there's so much tension here then," he laughs uncomfortably while Regina and I stare at him, unamused. "I'll just go grab the little guy, so we can get that ice cream."
I watch as Robin strolls away and makes small talk with Ruby. They are both acting like they know each other fairly well. She never once mentioned Regina being in a relationship. Bitch!
"So, can I assume he's your boyfriend?" I ask casually, or at least tried to.
"That's none of your concern."
"Look Regina I moved back and I'm not going anywhere. I swear. I would really love to spend time with Henry and make amends with you," I took a timid step closer, "I don't deserve another chance. I know this, but I will spend every day proving you can trust me again. I'm not that same person I was five years ago."
She takes an assertive step closer to me, her nose almost brushing against mine. The familiar scent of faint apples mixed with laundry detergent invades my nostrils. All those feelings and memories I buried down for five years come rushing back with vengeance. I miss her plump lips against mine. I miss the way she held me close and all my fears and anxiety washed away. I miss the way her lips twisted into an evil smirk when she teased me. I miss the way she was once mine.
"Don't think I'm going to let you come barging your way into my life again, only to flip it upside down like you did the last time. Fool me once shame on me. You will not fool me again. Now I expect you to stay away from my son. Goodbye Miss Swan," she whispers Swan, so Henry wouldn't hear her, and I can't help but wonder why.
I take a step back not being able to stand that close to her just yet. I turn around and walk back to the booth I share with Ruby because truthfully I don't want to upset her anymore.
When I reach the booth? Henry yanks on my hand and my entire world around me stops. Everything is silent, and I only see him.
"You and Auntie Ruby should come with!" He beams as he looks up into my eyes.
"Wow, he must really like you. It takes him awhile to warm up to people. Hell, it was six months before he talked to me," Robin chuckles to himself, but I ignore him because all I see is my son.
I kneel down so I am eye level with Henry. My palms are sweaty, and my mind is spinning but the warmth of his little hand keeps me grounded.
"Sorry kid, we have some work to get done. Maybe next time okay? We can get your favorite. Let me guess it's..." I slowly tap my index finger to my chin pretending to think extremely hard, "Rocky Road?" Henry's face lights up like a night sky on the Fourth of July.
"Yeah! How'd you know?" He squeals with pure excitement.
I tap my temple and whisper, "Superpower," his green eyes dance with joy and I smile in return. "Now run along, your Mom is waiting for you and we don't want to make her mad," he nods and heads back toward Regina.
"Bye Emma!" He shouts over his shoulder.
"Bye little prince," the words fall from my mouth before I could even register them. Henry slips his hand inside of Regina's and turns around to face me once more.
"Did you hear that Mom? She called me prince, just like you!"
Regina peers down at her son. If I wasn't mistaken her eyes were glossed over but she still smiled. "Let's go get some ice cream."
The three of them walk out the door, hand in hand, and my heart breaks all over again. I wish I could be Robin. I should be Robin right now. I slump back down in the booth and exhale.
"Well that was horrible," I groan while rubbing my palms against my face.
"It could've been worse," Ruby shrugs nonchalantly.
"Why didn't you tell me she had a boyfriend? A little heads up would've been nice!"
"Listen Emma, you walked out of their lives, out of mine and Belle's with barely a goodbye.
Nobody owes you anything. As much as Regina hid it...and well might I add, you still broke her. You three could've been really happy together."
"We still can be," I mutter under my breath.
"Yeah well good luck with that," she rolls her eyes sarcastically and shoves a menu back in front of me. "Now can we please eat? I'm starving."