Chapter 52

in memoriam

A girl without a name-Am I a girl?-flowed through the darkness. Everything was vague. Indistinct. Something was wrong.

It's me. I'm what's wrong. The thought was tainted with confusion, yet seemed to contain a profound truth.

Ignoring the shimmering phantasms that appeared whenever she stopped moving, the figure lurched on through the night, surrounded by a halo of harsh blue-white light.

Kaname Madoka, I am happy to see you are alive and well.

Homura jumped in surprise, the dark, complicated thoughts vanishing as the cheerful voice rang out in her head unexpectedly. "K-Kyubey!" she growled, eyes searching for the tell-tale white creature, annoyed that the beast would interrupt her brooding. Then she stopped, its words sinking in.

"Madoka-chan!" she breathed, spinning toward the girl in a fan of glossy black hair. She knelt at the side of her friend, seeing the slow rise and fall of her chest, reaching out a hand before pulling back at the last moment. Madoka opened her eyes, blinking slowly.

"Uhhh. Whagahfo?" Above her, confusingly, she saw Akemi Homura's face regard her nervously, pinched with concern. Coughing delicately, the pinkette's face twisted in pain for a moment. "Oh. Homura-chan." Pausing, she tried to collect her thoughts. "What is going on?"

Welcome back to material realm, Kyubey's exuberant voice echoed through both girls' heads, causing Madoka to wince.

"Madoka-chan, I… it's a long-"

"My throat hurts." Pushing herself up on one arm, she gladly accepted the transfer student's offered hand, her knees feeling wobbly as she stood. "I wonder if I'm getting sick."

"Madoka… you were shot."

"What?" The small girl's brow furrowed. "Really? I don't-"

Akemi Homura is correct. Your body has only just finished repairing itself. That is why you suffer lingering pains. It is a simple matter for you to turn off such base, outdated survival mechanisms. The large, pinkish orbs gleamed, regarding her curiously.

"It's not bad" the girl assured, somewhat untruthfullly. The pain was sharp, and now that she thought about it, Madoka was certain she tasted blood. But most important of all... "Who would want to shoot me?" Madoka breathed, feeling suddenly anxious.

Several other magical girls, armed with high-powered rifles.

"Kyubey, who were those girls who attacked us? They claimed to be allied to the yakuza. Are there any more of them?" Madoka gasped dramatically. The transfer student shot her an apologetic glance.

I have not encountered them before. They appeared to be moderately powerful, no doubt some of them are veterans. I know of no others in the city, and none that are nearby.

Madoka frowned. Something was off about the fox-like creature's answer. A nagging tickle in the back of her mind, she recalled another odd feeling she had picked up from the Incubator.

"How do you not know who they are?" Homura pressed. "I know there's more than one of you."

More than one Incubator? Certainly. More than one me? Impossible. The fluffy white tail swished through the air dismissively.

"Incubator, I've killed you hundreds of times-"

Hundreds, Akemi Homura? The creature's eyes seemed to flicker for a moment, wide with curiosity. It seemed to focus its consciousness, and Homura knew what it whispered was a message to her alone. Perhaps you are exaggerating for effect? Or perhaps, you aren't...

Flustered, Homura charged on. "You die, and then are back. How else do you explain it?"

Kyubey pawed at the carpet lazily. The explanation is simple. As an Incubator, my activities bring me into a variety of dangerous situations. In order to better facilitate my role as guide and mentor to Puella Magi as they cross the threshold into their new existences, we are able to transfer our consciousness between vessels. In my case, it stated proudly, standing up to spin in a lazy circle before falling over on his side. Me! it finished cheerfully with a flick of its tail.

Madoka shuddered, feeling her flesh crawl as she stared at the unchanging grin. Something about the way the creature was talking, the look in its eyes… it was laughing at them, inside. And not in the nice way.

If I did possess multiple vessels simultaneously, I wouldn't have had to run all the way from Kazimino City.

"Kazimino?" wondered Madoka, feeling a little left out. I just got shot! she frowned. Now I'm getting ignored. Feeling bad at the petty thought, she forced herself to relax and pay attention.

But Kyubey was staring at Homura. Its intense gaze seemed to stare through the transfer student, and she felt the creature's intellect focusing itself on her. Akemi Homura, you are the only being capable of defeating Walpurgis. You know this, you have always known this. Kaname Madoka has her part to play, if she chooses to, but only you possess the ability to end this once and for all.

A shiver ran down Homura's spine, but her face remained impassive. Inside, though, she cringed at how the alien's words matched exactly with her own instinctive beliefs.

If she chooses to… Homura's breath had stopped. Did that mean it was possible for-

The white-furred creature turned its patient gaze towards Madoka. I must inform you that your friend, Miki Sayaka, was attacked by another group of strange Puella Magi, and has finally transformed. She is now a Witch.

Homura gasped, not surprised but saddened, feeling a flood of responsibilities wash over her. The talk, just last night… the blunette had made her wishes clear. Her thoughts spun to- "Kyoko!" she whispered. Suddenly, she was feeling off-balance. The redhead was looking for Sayaka, and would find… No! She needed the veteran, it was too much to ask, to fight alone, again.

Finally? wondered Madoka, puzzled as she picked through the vortex of feeling she was getting. Large, unblinking pink eyes regarded her blankly from across the room, a lazy swish of its tail the alien's only movement. The news should terrify her, but instead… "That's not true, Kyubey! Y-you know it's not!"

Lie? Me? Kyubey raised a paw, pointing at its chest. Another swish of its white, fox-like tail.

"Madoka, I'm so sorry-" began the transfer student, but the pinkette spun around angrily.

"Homura-chan, I'm telling you-"

Sakura Kyoko had arrived in Kazimino when I'd left, Kyubey interjected. Slowly it turned to regard the black-haired girl, perfectly still as she reacted to this observation. Madoka didn't detect any feeling of falsehood, but instead a creepy malevolence that left her scared and angry at the same time. What is happening? Nothing was making sense.

Except one thing that made perfect sense. Homura was worried. The pinkette nearly thought of it as desperate, but the girl looked as composed as ever. "Homura-chan…" Madoka began, words failing as the taller girl looked down at her sadly, eyes stinging with regret.

You humans and your wishful thinking. Even after all this time, I cannot see any advantage to deluding oneself-

"Madoka-chan, I… I have to go." She swallowed, and the pinkette let her continue, trying to hide a growing sense of rejection. "I have to find Sakura-san before-"

"Akemi Homura!" Madoka cried, taking a threatening step towards the black-haired Puella Magi. My ally. Friend. "You're not listening to me, Sayaka-chan isn't dead!"

It is unfortunate that humans have a such difficult time understanding the metamorphosis, but your friend Miki Sayaka has helped the universe with a not-insignificant fraction of new energy. Madoka gave the white animal an outraged glare.

Homura looked at her sadly for a moment, blinking back stinging tears. "Madoka-chan, I'm extremely sorry to do this, but I… I made a promise."

Not entirely insignificant. In the sense that the creation of any energy, from essentially nothing, is a significant event, by definition the event had significance. Perhaps that thought will bring you solace.

Homura ignored Kyubey, forcing herself to meet Madoka's eyes instead, eyes like sunsets flashing angrily between her and the Incubator. "I have to go, now. I don't expect you to understand, but I have to leave you. I hope you're right, and that Miki-san is alive and well but I can't take that risk-"

Madoka staggered back a step, looking wounded for just a moment before putting on a brave, hopeful smile.. Homura held her breath, pretending not to notice. "Not even going to invite me?" the pinkette asked, somewhat somberly.

Homura winced. "I… I don't think… If she's, well…" The time traveler watched in fascination as the girl's tiny fists balled up, her lower lip jutting out angrily. "If she's well, I'll bring her back."

Madoka stood with her hands at her sides, willing her arms not to cross angrily over her chest. "Don't you think I'm strong enough?"

"No, it's not that-"

"Then what is it?"

Homura sighed, the bundle of feeling that flailed around inside her breaking free from her control, sharpening her tone. "This is what I was always worried about, Madoka-chan. I know you. If it is Miki-san's time and she's become one of them, you'll…" Taking a deep breath, she continued despite the look in the pinkette's suddenly fiery gaze. "You'll try to rescue her, talk to her, even though… even though there is no her, anymore! Something could happen; she's dangerous, I've always been honest about that. She… it… could kill you. AND I CAN'T LET YOU DIE!" Through a veil of tears, Homura saw the smaller girl take a step forward, and found her arms yearning to spread in hopes of an embrace. Needing some shred of understanding of her impossible position.

The ghostly sense of something long-lost died before it could take shape. "The only reason I'm not slapping you right now," Madoka's voice quavered with emotion, "is that you're doing what you think is right. But you're wrong! Homura-chan, you're not listening to me!" An anxious, lost feeling washed over her as she watched the transfer student's reaction, a dismaying hardening of her features. Why wasn't she listening? "Sayaka-chan is fine!"

Nobody understands. Nobody could possible understand. "I hope you're right, Madoka-chan. I hope-"

"Oh my god, BE QUIET AND LISTEN!" Homura's eyes were wide, bubblegum pink hair and tiny lips centimeters from her face.. "I am right! That's what I'm trying to tell you."

"What-" Pausing to wipe some spittle from her face, Homura tried to collect herself. Long black hair was gathered up and thrown over a shoulder. "How do you know?"

Madoka frowned. "I… I just know. I do!" she insisted. "It's like a power. I think. I get this, like… feeling?"

Kaname Madoka seems to be confused, probably resulting from the effects of her wish.

Privately to Madoka, it thought, Or possibly due to a downward spiral into insanity, no longer able to tell reality from elaborate fiction constructed by your own fracturing mind.

"I am NOT CRAZY!" she roared. Homura cringed backward, actually looking frightened. It was almost enough to make the pinkette burst out into laughter, or tears.

"Madoka, I'm sorry-"

"Stop saying that!"

"Sorr-, er… Are you okay, if I leave you here? I can get you a cab to bring you home-"

"I'll be fine," the short girl replied tersely, heading for the door. "I'll get one myself. You obviously have important things to do, at least more important than listening to what your friend is trying to tell you."

Time was of the essence. Madoka was alive; Kyoko was the one who needed to be saved now. If only I could make her understand! "I… I have to do this. I promised her! I know Miki-san was your good friend, but please don't be mad. Don't hate me, Madoka-chan! If I don't-"

"Best friend," Madoka sighed, turning back briefly to give the girl a disappointed look. "She is my best friend. And I'm not mad you, n-not for g-going out to kill a Witch that used to be m-my friend," she stated as flatly as possible, even though the idea was atrocious to contemplate. "Because she isn't, so you won't. I'm pissed," she emphasized with a shake of a tiny fist, "because you don't believe me." She paused, waiting for a response. The undercurrent of skepticism may have been imagined, but regardless the silence quickly began to annoy her. "Well?"

"I just can't risk it, Madoka-chan. Kyoko… she'll die if she fights Sayaka."

It was some time ago that I left Kazamino City, purred the voice in their heads. It is likely that, given Sakura Kyoko's excellent tracking skills, she has already encountered signs of what used to be Miki Sayaka…

"It's not true," Madoka warned. When Homura refused to make eye contact, though, she realized she'd lost. To Kyubey. It was bitter, and seemed ironic. With an angry glower, she crossed her slender arms.

A girl flew through the darkened streets, her face grim. The long, powerful strides were confident, full of careless grace. The loping gait of a predator, fluid and effortless.

Sometimes life really fucking sucks.

Kyoko gritted her teeth, tasting blood as her tongue was pinched viciously. The sharp, pure feeling of pain as a fang punctured the soft tissue was distracting.

Frowning, she bit down harder, the taste of iron and copper in her throat.

She could feel a wide, empty nothingness laying just below her, vast and invisible. She could feel its gravity, a pulling in the pit of her stomach, making her eyes burn. This isn't how it was supposed to be-

"Stop it," the redhead growled in a thick whisper. Clearing her throat, she spat forcefully against the window of a parked car, noting the slight pinkish hue underneath the streetlight. She'd passed dozens, or hundreds, of such cars, during the past… hours? Minutes? Shaking her head, Kyoko realized she had no idea how much time had passed. Everything was a whirling blur.

...since…

Feeling the sickening, writhing mass inside of her chest, the veteran stopped. This was getting her nowhere. Absently, her long fingers rubbed together, almost traitorously. The gritty dust brought it all back, every single thought she was trying to get away from.

Bending over at the entrance to the alley, running her fingers through the sparkling shards of blue glass that had been sprinkled about so innocuously. She almost hadn't noticed. If it hadn't been for the blood, and morbidly thinking about the girl's last earthly traces-

Leaning against the wet brick of the building, the redhead pressed the heels of her hands against her eyes, shoulders shaking silently in the darkness as she drew short, ragged breaths.

Behind her eyes, bursting with color from the pressure of her hands, a scene replayed in her mind. The screaming blue-haired woman waking her up, her heart pounding in her ears as she dashed out the door barely remembering to grab her clothes, her last glance of the blunette laying in her bed, eyes wide and looking totally and completely confused.

So goddamn cute, I love it when she looks like that.

She felt the tears starting to come. I didn't even get to say goodbye! Momo, Mami, Sayaka… I wasn't able to say goodbye to any of them! I never worked up to it, told them how I feel-

It was agonizing. The regret was a different pain than her lacerated tongue; it was deeper and crueler. A focusing pain, the polar opposite of the distraction she craved. She felt the cold grip of despair again, after so many years, sharper and distilled. The pointlessness of it all. Meaningless. Fighting, killing, watching friends die.

Crazy, wild ideas flew through her head in a maelstrom of tantalizing possibilities. What if something, just one little thing, had been different? What if she hadn't stayed at Sayaka's last night? What if she'd never stolen the money from that stupid hotel? What if she'd met up with the blunette, gotten here sooner, been with her, waited for her…

Why didn't I just wait for her? A wave of self-loathing slithered through her mind. Regret meant nothing now, but the thought wouldn't cease. Why didn't I...

What if. What if I'd done this, or not done that. Would everything be better?

Everything was chaos. It was like something had taken over her mind, or possibly she herself was inside of someone else. Or something else.

Unceasingly, images flickered into and out of existence, making it impossible to focus on what was real and what was not.

Something inside her was screaming.

IT'S NOT FAIR!

She had no idea what the voice was raging about, but she knew without a doubt that it was right.

As her temper cooled, Madoka absently kicked at the curb. In truth, she didn't know the first thing about getting a cab, or even what direction her home lay in from here. She was pretty sure Homura's apartment was that direction, but... At the moment, none of that seemed to matter, although a part of her acknowledged the darkness and drizzling wet rain would be something she had to deal with in the near future.

But for now, her thoughts focused inward.

The way Kyubey had mentioned that Sayaka had finally succumbed to the curse… it tickled around inside her head, minutes ticking by unproductively as she traveled down the sidewalk. She was hesitant to transform into her outfit. Her eyes scanned the rooftops and skyline more thoroughly than she had since she was a toddler, sparked not by interest but worry. It was like… like the alien had stressed that something inevitable had finally occurred. Something that it had known about… and known when it was supposed to happen. Much more so that just the standard, expected fate of a magical girl. The sensation of satisfaction, almost like a plan had come into fruition.

Sayaka… she said that Kyubey did something to her. Did he… The thought was too vile to contemplate, but she forced herself to consider anyway, feeling slightly queasy. Knowing that the creature took advantage of people for its own needs, or the needs of its people, which amounted to about the same thing. The whole "for the good of the universe" story was a bit much, even before she'd been able to feel that strange sense of wrongness emanating from the creature.

Am I wrong, about all of this? It was a fair question. It could all just be my imagination. Nobody else feels anything from Kyubey, and he's never been bad to us, exactly. Why does he seem so creepy now? Something about those eyes…

Shivering, she glanced around, but was unable to make out any telltale flashes of white through the drizzle falling from the dark sky.

Of all the places… Kyoko stopped, staring up at the dilapidated building across the street. Stupid subconscious, stupid feet. What the hell-

Sighing, Kyoko shrugged in resignation, bouncing the ruby sphere carelessly in her palm. "What the hell?" Why not? There's a kind of poetry to it. Full circle, and all that. The clarity she felt now was amazing in contrast to the recent blur. Part of her wondered how long it would last.

As if to prove her doubts, it was hard to take that first step. She stood, staring up at the edifice of the once-mighty church, a place that had bustled with the activity of several thousand members, people living their lives to the best of their ability with a shared sense of purpose. A unity that, while she'd never felt a part of herself, Kyoko had appreciated as a young girl.

How things change. The bitterness of the past, the hopeless anger and frustration and more than anything the overwhelming sense of confusion… all had faded in the background. An overwhelming tiredness gripped her soul with such tenacity that it left no room for any other feeling.

Weary. That's it. World-weary.

Closing her eyes, Kyoko forced herself to relive the most nightmarish hours of her life. The screaming, ranting dogma her father assailed her with, the utterly wretched feeling of being completely misunderstood and betrayed by the man she had adored. The white-hot anger, fueled by a sense of righteous indignation that this man, who owed everything he had to her wish, would judge her so harshly…

The daughter who gave up everything for her father. Her family. Even with the exciting and important duties of a newly-contracted Puella Magi, Kyoko had known that she was leaving part of her life behind the moment she made her wish.

The worst of it was that the accusations were true.

She'd thought about that afternoon, replayed this memory as well. So many possibilities. What if she hadn't blurted it out, hadn't stood up to her father's small-mindedness that one time. No man was perfect, even the Bible admitted that much, but she'd seen her father as someone above mere mortals. Surely, he of all people should understand how love works in mysterious ways...

What if she hadn't fled? What if she'd talked it out with him, somehow made him understand? What if she'd just shut her mouth, backed down and swallowed her damned pride? Instead, she said it, and then she'd run like a coward, run from the imposing man and his incessant rhetoric. A diatribe of everything foul and hateful, aimed at the core of his daughter's very being.

Perversion. Witchcraft.

Satan.

If those memories brought unquenched pain, the flames brought the searing agony of loss. Grimacing, she remembered how she'd read a story to Momo the night before. Samson and Delilah. Her sister had listened in fascination, but halfway through Kyoko was drawn again to how often the females ended up being the bad guys and taking all the blame…

She'd already picked out another story as she walked home that evening. With a fresh Grief Seed, the world hadn't seemed so forbidding and she'd begun to hope her father had cooled down. Not forgiven, but temporarily forgotten, at least. It was after dinner, so she might not even see him-

Turning the corner, she'd instantly noticed something was terribly, terribly wrong. Her house was burning. As she approached, sirens began to wail in the distance.

She'd run inside. She had tried to save her, save them. Somehow, though, she knew.

I'm always too late.

The sight of those charred, blackened bodies on the floor, and her father's hanging from the crossbeam still plagued her dreams. The smallest one, especially.

I should have died with them. It was uncharacteristic, but somehow liberating to the redhead. All too often, it seemed like her life since then had been one misery after the next. Most were petty and ignorable, but some…

Some were cataclysmic.

Kyoko tried to compare two horrors in her mind. Which was worse, that first feeling of utter despair, or this last one? It was impossible to say. Sayaka's death was fresher, however, and at that thought her stoic exterior crumbled, and veteran felt herself drop to a knee, the weight of her burdens seeming to crush down on her shoulders, the sensation nearly physical in its power.

Standing up slowly, the girl's hand unconsciously reached into her pocket, drawing out a familiar red box containing a packet of crinkly silver foil. Eating was the go-to distraction whenever she thought about her family. Maroon eyes looked down in incomprehension, staring at the Pocky as if wondering how it had gotten there.

She'd never felt less hungry in her whole life. With a snarl, she hurled the package away, took a deep breath and strode into her father's church.

A step, and Kyoko couldn't keep her mind from thinking the forbidden thought. What if-

Another step. If, somehow, she were alive-

Step. She was definitely coming here.

Step. But no. Broken soul gem means dead, or…

Pause. Witch.

She blinked. The thought hadn't occurred to her. Maybe Sayaka hadn't been killed at all, maybe she… she was a…

A confused jumble of emotions stirred up within her. Horror and pain at her friend's loss, and a fate worse than death, but also something almost like… hope. Yearning.

At least I'd get to see her, one last time. Say what needs to be said.

Another step. It was horrible, in a way, and she felt guilty for thinking it, but somehow, anything seemed better than… than just an end. The blunette being gone, forever, and herself all alone. Truly alone, now that Mami's ever-comforting presence had been taken away as well. Just knowing there had been someone out there who may have cared...

She pushed open the door.

Glancing down at her hand, she noticed no tell-tale flicker of disturbance in her Soul Gem, reacting to the presence of a Witch. Maybe that's just because of how new she is, Kyoko considered, her eyes fixed straight forward. The entry vestibule was showing signs of neglect and wear, but it would be in the sanctuary where she might find what she was looking for.

Holding her breath, she pushed the second set of doors open and strode inside, taking in the room at a glance. A vast, waterstained ceiling arched above her, broken plaster and rafters visible in one corner. The pews lay scattered, some broken, others just missing. Things seemed different than the last time she'd been here. The altar remained whole, but the baptismal font had been overturned, the shattered fragments of the stone basin scattered across the dusty, debris strewn floor.

The sanctuary was silent. And dismayingly empty. Spinning around, Kyoko looked for a sign, any indication of… anything.

There was nothing.

The thoughts came fast and without pity. There's where I was standing when I told her about my wish. Why did I tell her, of all people? There were other girls who could have used a reality check, but it was like…

"It was like," Kyoko began, addressing the empty room, "for once I saw something in someone that I liked. Admired. I guess I'm a sucker for knights in shining armor and all that shit. I hadn't really felt that way, not since Mami." Pausing, the veteran debated putting things best left unsaid into words. "Maybe that's part of it. You remind me a little… a little of her, and me. The old me, at least. I don't gotta go into detail about that right now, but I just… I need to let you know how I feel, Sayaka. Miki Sayaka, I…"

Through the swirling haze of half-remembered events and unfamiliar people, something began to coalesce. Something ghostly and insubstantial became a foggy, billowing awareness, which in turn solidified into a single drop of understanding.

Something's wrong. I… Something is wrong with me.

A voice, different than before, was calling out. It seemed to tug at her.

Miki Sayaka.

That's… her! That's me! The droplet shimmered, free falling back towards earth. As the fog condensed around her, the girl felt the last traces of the presence disappear, a fractured tapestry of memory and feeling from another life entirely suddenly torn to shreds. As she sliced her way though the final vestiges of the conciousness that had nearly possessed her, the girl hurled toward the ground, feeling like she was actually racing to the surface of a vast lake for a desperate gasp of air.

"I want to say… I'm s-sorry." Swallowing, Kyoko cleared her throat, wiping the back of her sleeve across her eyes. "I can't even work up the... I should be out there tracking down the fucks that took you from me, but I can't. I can't get past... I should have been here for you, baby. It's like I said in the closet last night, you can never take for granted what tomorrow will bring. And… that's what my dumb ass did. I should have waited for you. I shouldn't have left you. I'm s-so sorry!"

Unconcerned with the dimming light of the crimson sphere she held in her hands, the redhead took a shuddering breath, prepared to admit her responsibility. "It's my fault. All my fault. I… I shouldn't have gotten close to you. Bad things happen to people I like, I guess. Momo. Even Mami. But it's not like I had a choice! I couldn't help it! Ever since I first saw you, all crazy blue hair and obnoxious, self righteous attitude, I couldn't tear myself away. I'll admit it now, but maybe I was kind of following you for a while there, not in a creepy, stalking way… well. Judge for yourself, I guess. But in spite of how I feel for you Sayaka, it's my fault you're dead. Or worse, whatever has happened. You were right, I should never have stolen that money. It's all my fault!"

Slowly, the girl woke up. Something heavy was pressing down on her, pinning her painfully to the floor. Her body felt bruised. Groaning, she shifted, feeling like there was something she was supposed to be doing.

"It's all my fault!" The sound, half-sob and half-screech, set off an intense image in her mind, the beautiful, indomitable young woman she felt such a connection to completely transformed, pain shining in her eyes and tears running down her cheeks. It was wrong, but unlike before, this was a wrong she knew how to fix.

Kyoko's heard froze at the sound of shifting debris. Slowly, she turned in place, catching some broken and overturned benches move from across the room. She suddenly had an overwhelming burst of what she could only think of as a presence. A startlingly familiar one, at that. Without thinking, her eyes scanned the room, searching for the tell-tale signs of a barrier.

Like most Puella Magi, Kyoko's eyes were keen in perfect darkness. As heavy wood clattered and shifted, she saw a flickering blue light the grew in intensity, strange shapes and patterns playing against the tarnished walls of the abandoned church, glimmering strangely off of the shards of stained glass that still clung stubbornly to their led frames.

Glancing down at the gem cupped in her palm, crimson eyes narrowed in confusion.

Nothing. Nothing was there.

"...the hell?" Suddenly angry, she strode forward. She'd thought, for a moment-

Eyes wide, Kyoko's heart seemed to freeze for several long seconds, but her body leapt forward long before she could recover her thoughts. Bright blue light seemed to envelop the entire room.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"Not… your fault," Sayaka wheezed, the words rolling off her tongue as she regained consciousness. Putting her limited understanding of this most recent ordeal in the back of her mind, she focused on the only thing that seemed to matter. The thing that had brought her back.

A familiar voice was screaming, and then the weight was lifted off of her and the blunette could only smile as her head was cradled tenderly. She opened her eyes.

Kyoko had thrown off the broken, splintered wood that had covered the glowing light, a glow that illuminated the whole chamber with it's radiance as she threw back the wreckage covering the curled form of her blue-haired soulmate. She's here! Feeling dazed, a cyclone of thoughts paralyzed her for a moment, unable to sort out where to begin, what to say. "Are you okay? I'm so sorry, Sayaka! I didn't mean for-"

"Kyoko. Kun. Hush." Sayaka breathed deeply, feeling better by the second. She remained where she lay, luxuriating in Kyoko's lap. "I don't need to hear anymore." She sighed, smiling slightly. "It's so good to hear your voice." It was several moments before she could continue. "My first day as a runaway… didn't go so well."

Smiling, staring at the blurry blue blob she'd come to love so much, Kyoko noticed the glow emanating from the girl. Blinking, she turned her head to quickly wipe a cheek, turning back to gaze at the bright light that seemed to come from underneath the cute little belly-covering flap of Sayaka's battle-bra.

Following the redhead's gaze, the blunette's eyes widened in surprise. "That's strange." With a chill of foreboding, she envisioned a dark, black crystal scarred with a jagged crack. She had to see, though. Flipping the cloth up, her eyes narrowed as the glare became dazzling.

"Damn. Never seen one that bright," Kyoko muttered, feeling overwhelmed and awestruck. Is this really happening, or maybe I'm dead, or delusional… She leaned forward, almost feeling the warmth suffusing her with invigorating vitality. She's alive! This has to be real...

Sayaka, feeling a stabbing guilt as she made a dark connection between the state of her Soul Gem and the fight… shuddering, she felt a wave of revulsion begin to wash over her-but then, suddenly, lips were pressed to her own and she felt a crushingly comforting embrace, pressing herself into the clutches of the redhead eagerly as all thought was instantly obliterated.

Panting, Kyoko pulled back first, running her lips across her shoulder. "Seems real to me," she confirmed to herself. Sayaka, red-cheeked, laughed in confusion.

"I'm real," Sayaka agreed. "Well, I'm pretty sure about that, at least." Her hands continued to clutch the girl's sides, and she drew a thumb across her chest. "You seem real, too."

Kyoko shook her head, grinning stupidly. "I can't fucking believe it…" Like an afternoon sun suddenly being covered by storm clouds, Kyoko's face became pained, her body wilting. "I'm sorry, baby, I know it's all my fault-"

"No, it's not," Sayaka interrupted, putting a finger to the older girl's lips. "I'm telling you that, and I'm the judgemental one, remember? I don't know if this will help, but… those girls. That whole… gang, I guess you'd call it. They're bad."

Kyoko rolled her eyes before catching herself. Oops. Blushing under the blunette's flat stare, she shrugged. "You're right. They are-"

"I mean," Sayaka explained with smug little grin, "is that they're really bad. Really, really bad."

Crimson eyes regarded her curiously. "How do you… nevermind." The flicker of unease she saw in the azure eyes disappeared as the half-formed question was withdrawn. "Can you, ah, elaborate?"

Sayaka pushed herself up, and heard the redhead stifle a tiny sigh. "We hunt Witches, to get their Grief Seeds."

The veteran could only agree. "Yes. And sometimes, when it makes sense, Familiars."

"What would you do if there were no Witches?" Seeing her companion's confusion, she added, "How would you get the Grief Seeds?"

"I guess… let the Familiars kill off a few people and become Witches themselves?"

Sayaka swallowed. "Oh. Right. What if… what if there were no Familiars?"

"I… oh. Damn, that's cold. They told you this?" Kyoko repressed a shudder of dread.

Sayaka looked to the side. "Some of what they said… yes. I caught on."

Now that she was sitting across from the blunette in the flesh, Kyoko found herself brimming with questions. She wanted to know everything. "So… what happened? And why are you still in your outfit?"

"Oh!" With a bashful grin, she concentrated and her outfit disappeared, along with the intense glow. "I… I don't know. Well, I guess I fought them. The three of them." She smiled sadly. "And… I guess, I won."

"You are such a braggart." She leaned into the other girl, feeling a thrill as, without hesitation, the blunette embraced her back. Kyoko held on, afraid that even now everything would disappear, that it was all a dream. "I'm never letting you out of my sight again. Never ever. Don't even try to argue!"

"Who said anything about arguing?" Sayaka asked, slightly breathless but with a grin, nuzzling into the older girl's neck. She felt the salty tang of the girl's sweat on her lips, and the blunette felt her pulse suddenly quicken. "I'm pretty much lost without you, today was proof enough of that."

"Pssshhh." Kyoko pushed her companion back by the shoulders, looking at her critically. "You seemed to do alright on your own. For a complete newbie homeless kid."

Sayaka laughed. "I haven't eaten since lunch."

Suddenly focused, Kyoko was on her feet, reaching down with a hand. "Well, let's get going then! No way my girl is going to bed hungry."

"Bed. Mmmm." Sayaka sighed. "That sounds good. But I suppose the floor will do, or maybe one of these benches-" Looking around in alarm, she began to make out the damage that surrounded her. "Oh no, Kyoko-kun I think I wrecked your church!" Flashes of panicked rage flickered through her mind, some kind of epic contest which resulted in her smashing everything within her grasp.

"Fine with me, I'm just sad the job's only half done. I have a mind to tear this place down myself." Cracking her knuckles, the redhead continued. "We are absolutely not staying in this fucking place," she insisted, rather forcefully. Sayaka swallowed. "It's… drafty." Haunted would have sounded too melodramatic.

"But… where then? I… I don't think I can sleep in the rain, Kyoko." Feeling like a disappointment, Sayaka was amazed to hear Kyoko's good-natured laughter, her favorite kind and also the most rarely heard.

"Lovah, I got a plan. And I think you'll like it." Eyebrows waggled enthusiastically, and Sayaka's helpless laughter rang through the dilapidated building.

Stepping out into the night, the Kyoko stared into the darkness, marvelling at the change in perspective a few minutes could make. But it wasn't the time. It was the person. The possibilities that the future continued to hold...

Unnoticed, Sayaka bent down, picking something up off the pavement. Kyoko blinked as something wet was pressed into her hand. "I think you must have dropped that," the girl at her side explained. "Any chance you feel like sharing?"

With a grin splitting her face, Kyoko unwrapped the Pocky, pressing a handful of the sticks into her partner's palm, watching with delight as the girl stuffed the entire bunch into her mouth, chewing vigorously.

"Sayaka." Blue eyes, looking suddenly self-conscious, widened as the redhead leaned forward, grabbing her shoulders roughly. "I just wanted to say, well... I absolutely fucking love you."

Madoka cringed, her back to the wall of the alley she'd ducked into. Certain she'd felt a presence, something following her, she'd been unable to ignore it any longer. Earlier anger forgotten, the pinkette couldn't help wishing that Homura was still around.

A noise, a soft snap of fabric rippling in the wind. Not daring to breathe, Madoka glanced around fearfully, scanning the dark street and surrounding rooftops. If there were more of those yakuza girls laying in wait…

"Madoka-chan?"

Nearly jumping out of her skin, the petite girl spun around, eyes wide and incredulous. Was it really…?

"Homura-chan?"

The pale, raven-haired girl stepped out of the shadows, the look on her face difficult to read. "Homura-chan, you nearly scared me to death!"

The studied blank look crumbled. "My apologies, that wasn't my intention-"

"What are you doing here?" Madoka asked innocently, as only she could, without a trace of suspicion or bitterness. She had a feeling…

"I… You were right. I can trust you, Madoka. I know I can. I've worked alone for so long, it's hard sometimes, but…" Looking up, the transfer student was distracted by the dazzling smile that seemed to light up the alley. "I… that is…"

Homura opened her arms as the smaller girl crashed into her chest. "I knew you wouldn't leave me, Homura-chan! I knew you'd trust me."

"I…"

"It's okay. Kyubey can be sneaky," Madoka admitted. "I'm starting to think he likes causing trouble." She clung onto the slender girl's bony frame, relieved in more ways than one. "What matters is that you chose to believe me, not him."

Stated so simply, Homura felt ready to burst into tears. "How is it even a choice? I'm sorry, Madoka-chan. I'll always choose you."

"You think... her soul, huh?" Kyoko chewed on that for a while, looking at her companion through the corner of her eye. "Sounds... like something we shouldn't tell anyone about. Not that it's bad," she amended quickly, seeing the alarm flash in the blue eyes that stared into her own. "Just, well, Madoka's a softie, and Homura... Well, let's think of it as your secret weapon or something."

"So... you don't think I'm a monster?" Sayaka's hands were clenched together tightly over a stomach that seemed to be doing flips inside her belly. Getting some of the details off her chest had been necessary, but nerve-wracking. Despite all of her fears and worries, though, Kyoko burst out into laughter.

"Are you kidding? If you're a monster, I'm the fucking devil," the redhead assured, giving her companion the most evil grin she could muster. It all sounded very... strange. But, whatever weirdness was going on paled in comparison to the utter and complete victory of the evening.

All traces of fatigue seemed to vanish as the two girls approached their destination. The cab had let them off at a familiar corner, and Sayaka felt the blood pounding in her ears. Nervous excitement warring with wary dread. Consciously, she forced the dark thoughts out of her mind, something not altogether difficult with the redhead's arm draped across her shoulders, walking hip to hip through the last vestiges of the evening's storm.

"What do you think?"

"I think… your plan is to stay at Mami's place?"

"Well, yeah," Kyoko said, a little crestfallen at the other girl's obvious hesitation.

Sayaka stood on the balcony, looking around nervously as Kyoko fiddled with the lock. When she heard the soft *click*, she turned to look as the redhead opened the door, and even in the darkness, she felt like she was somehow coming home.

"It's… perfect, waifu."

Smiling, self-confidence returning in a flash, Kyoko turned around to pull her girlfriend behind her, but instead let out a small screech of surprise as she was picked up bodily by the blunette in a single motion, cradled against the ample chest and carried like a prize across the threshold, shocked protests and wildly kicking feet entirely ignored by the younger girl.

Despite her predicament, the canny veteran had the presence of mind to reach out with a flailing arm to slam the door closed behind them.

Once again a long wait, hope it was relatively worth it. Your thoughts, opinions and speculation are appreciated as always. I'll try to update faster in the future; I agree that multi-month waits are a terrible thing to inflict on people. (*cough* angel0wonder *cough*... just kidding!)

Next up, most likely a brief tangent into the BCD universe.

Pleasant serendipity, onions, or is the lesson learned that I respond well to emotional blackmail? Please don't let your heart explode quite yet.

Thanks for the responses binge readers, I'm always curious how well it flows read pretty much straight through. Keep me posted.