Lucy pov

I opened my eyes. The light flashed in my eyes, making me flinch. I sat up and looked around. I had a pounding headache. My eyes were puffy, and my throat was dry. I swallowed.

What happened?

Oh..right. I cried my self to sleep again. I stood up and stretched my arms out. I got in the shower quickly. I rubbed my eyes the entire time so they would go down a bit.

I sat in my room after I was done changing. I couldn't help but think about that message. Did natsu actually send that? Was I actually a bitch to him? I sighed. I looked at the time. It was 10 am. Good thing today was Saturday.

I yawned and laid down again on my bed. I couldn't sleep so I laid there. Thinking.

I haven't thought this much in… ever.

I turned onto my side.

Natsu… he was.. Always on my mind. Why? Why do I feel this chest tightening everytime I thought of him? Or pictures him? I knew this feeling once.

"Like..whenever I think about or I'm around lissana. My chest automatically tightens. Is it like a disease or?"

What?

"I think it means you like her"

I covered my mouth.

"You have a crush!"

I widened my eyes. I felt everything come flying at me at once. It was like a slap to the face.

I liked natsu.

I stood up and ran our of my room. I grabbed my jacket and ran. I just ran. To the place I thought of first. I felt the wind through my hair. I breathed heavily.

I came to a halt when I got there. To erza's.

I knocked on the door. The door swung open. "Lucy?" Erza said and she grabbed my shoulders. "Come in" she pulled me inside.

"So… you like him?"

I nodded. She clenched her fists. "Erza I know but-" she stared at me. I went quiet. "After everything? After he abandoned you?" I sighed.

"Erza I think I liked him even before that."

"You think" she said sternly. I nodded. "I've just came to realize it just now. Literally" she slammed her hands on the table. "Lucy." She looked into my eyes.

"You realise you're only going to get hurt right?"

"I'm not going to do anything"

She sighed. I sat there.

"I'm not stopping you. I'm warning you. Natsu always has liked lissana. And who's to say he won't abandon you again"

"I don't plan on telling him. Or doing anything."

She breathed out and crossed her arms. I closed my eyes. "It's fine. But I'll beat his ass if he does it again" I shrugged my shoulders. "I'm not even going to try erza. So don't worry"

She smiled. I smiled back. "You know I just want what's best for you. I hate seeing you hurt" I waved my hands. "I know erza. But don't worry everything's going to be okay"

She frowned.

..

I walked down the street. It was quiet, and this area barely had any cars passing by. So it was always still.

I was going to this bookstore. I needed some more since I read everything I had, even the books in my dad's study. I'm lucky I have levy.

I breathed in the air. Finally. I was alone. Sure I was most times. But I never did bask in it, or enjoy it. I smiled. I looked up ahead. I turned around the corner.

My heart and everything with it dropped.

I stared at the person in front of me. They stared back at me. I couldn't do anything. I was stuck.

I stared into his black eyes. They weren't cold. But they were still the inky black I came to know.

Natsu stood in front of me. I stepped back. His eyes widened even more. I tried running away. But he grabbed my wrist and pulled me close.

"Lucy wait!"

"No" I said and pushed him away. He looked at me, frowning. "Lucy" he said. I stopped and looked at my feet. I could feel his eyes looking at me.

"Lucy… I'm-" I put a hand out. "Don't." I barely get out. "I don't want your concern or pity" he breathed out. He stepped closer to me. I stepped back again. "Please Lucy." He pleaded.

"No natsu. Don't" I say and look up. Tears were already in the corner of my eyes. "Please don't." I say. "Lucy I just wanted to say I'm sorry" I shook my head. "I'm sorry"

"Now you're sorry? Why is that? Why didn't you say it when I was there?" He hung his head low.

"I don't want to hear this." I say and try to walk past him. He grabbed my arm again. "Please Lucy" I looked at him. I grabbed my arm away from him. "Lucy I… I can't ever make it up to you. But I'm sorry"

"Sorry? You're sorry?!" I say. He flinched. "You're just saying that to make your self feel better! You don't care about anyone else" he stared at me again, teary eyed.

"Don't make me feel bad for something you did"

"I never wanted you to!" He shouted. I stopped. "Then..why?…" he sighed. He looked at me. I knew immediately what he meant.

Lissana.

"So.. You listened to her" I said. "Lucy..I-" I interrupted him "no no. It's okay. Just as long as shes happy right? And even if your actions make me miserable it's alright?" He clenched his fists.

"Miserable?"

I sighed. "Of course. You didn't think about how I felt"

"No its not like that" he stared at me. I smiled. And a tear rolled down my face. He stared at me with his eyes wide. "Then what is it? What was I to you? Some kind.. Of game?"

"I only did it because you threatened her! I told you that"

"So.. You believed her?… you out of everyone should know that I wouldn't do that. Not even to lissana"

"But still! I didn't know what I was thinking!"

I wiped my face. "You're just like the rest…" I put my head down. "I can't believe I trusted you" I felt the tears coming down fast. I wiped them and looked at him again.

"Lucy…"

I started yelling. "You are such a selfish bastard!" I never felt so frustrated in my life. "Do you hate me?" I stayed quiet.

"Do you regret it?" He said. I stopped. "Do you regret our memories together? The fun moments? When we laughed together? Do you regret it?"

I stood there.

"No"

He looked relieved. I kept staring at him. He stared back.

"I regret meeting you."

His face dropped.

"I regret it. I regret it when I thought you were different, I regret thinking you were my friend, I regret it when I believed your words. Thinking I could trust you"

He stared at the ground. I couldn't see his face. But I knew he was listening.

"I regret putting you above everyone else! Having these feelings. I regret for ever liking you!"

He lifted his head fast. I looked away from his eyes. He frowned even more then his eyes widened. "What?!" I turned on my heel and started running away. Crying. I didn't care what he was about to say.

I just wanted to get away. Far away.

…

I sat in class. I haven't heard from natsu since that day.

It's been a week now.

What am I expecting anyway? Another lie? I sighed. I shouldn't have told him. I liked him. I only just came to realize it. So why did I tell him?

I could've gotten away. I wrecked everything now. I can't face erza now. She'll get mad if she knew I told him. I sighed.

I turned my head looked out the window.

I sat at a bench outside. Erza and jellal said they'd meet up when they were finished. So I said I'd wait here until they were finished. It was cold out. I breathed into my hands for warmth.

"Hey Blondie"

I looked up. Lissana stood there. She and her little group. They all smirked at me, I feel like something bad was about to happen.

"Hey. I heard you like natsu"

I froze. "Where did you hear that?!" She laughed. "As if natsu wouldn't tell me" I stared at the ground. He.. Told her? "I thought you didn't want to be around him" she walked toward me.

"I didn't say that. Besides. He was the one who wanted to talk to me"

She pushed me.

"Stay away from him"

"I just said he wanted to talk to me!"

"Do you want me to make you stay away from him?"

I shouted. "What's your problem?!" She chuckled "you." She stated. "I can't stand you. Now you're trying to take him away from me?" Her group walked towards me.

They grabbed my arms. I struggled to get loose. They held me tight as I squirmed under their grip. "You disgust me" she said in my face. She smiled and kicked me in the stomach.

I felt the pain surge through me.

They let go of me and let me fall to the ground. I coughed. "You bitch" she said. And kicked me again. I coughed even more. It hurt. Badly.

"Awe the blondie is hurt" she said in a girly voice. She kicked me even harder than last time. "This is for being a pest" she kicked me again. I kept coughing. Groaning in pain. The pain got worse and worse.

"Ha-ha ha!" She laughed. She picked me up by the collar and punched me. I fell to the cold hard ground. I felt dizzy. Everything felt weird. My stomach and back ached with pain.

"Stupid bitch!" She cackled. She kicked me again. I started blanking out. I coughed up blood. I sat up and stared at it.

I heard them laughing at me. Their voices started to fade. The world started to turn.

I fell to the ground again. My eyes felt heavy. Everything looked fuzzy. I was in so much pain. I felt my stomach. My face felt even worse.

I closed my eyes.

…

Oh god I'm so sorry for not updating. I was so busy this weekend. I guess now this means no sleep again XD

please review and enjoy!