Disclaimer: It all belongs to SM. I only own the story line and whatever future characters decide to pop up.

A/N: I want to give a special thanks to madmamabear for being my Beta. Thank you so much for working with me on my story. It really means alot to me. Luv Ya!

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WARNING!:

Some situations in this story may be too graphic for anyone under the age of 18. If you are under age stop here, if not please continue. The warning remains due to capricious plot bunnies!

What Could Have Been

CHAPTER 18

BELLA'S POV

Jake and I talked it out and we agreed together that this was a good decision to make. We walked hand in hand back to the cabin and went inside to see everyone before the night ended. Jake said he would speak to his dad about his decision; then the preperations would be made for the wedding, the ceremony to name Jake Chief afterward and then we could go on our honeymoon.

Jake asked me if I wanted any of the Cullens or my other school friends to come to the wedding.

"Only if it's alright with you Jake."

He said he was okay with it if that's what I wanted. We said goodnight to everyone and checked on the twins; feeding and changing. Emily and Rachel went to bed and everyone else went home for the night.

We readied ourselves for bed and crawled under the covers; holding each other tightly before falling asleep. Morning came and started our day. I went in to feed the twins and I couldn't believe how much they've grown. Jake dressed, kissed the three of us and let me know he was on his way over to his dad's to speak to him about becoming Chief. Emily, Rachel and I stayed home to care for the little ones.

NARRATOR

"Dad?" Jake called out.

"I'm here son, what's going on?"

"I need to speak with you about the tribe and my decision."

"Alright Jacob, what have you decided?"

"I've thought this over carefully and discussed the matter with Bella. We feel it's the right choice for me, my family and my tribe; but I need to make sure that I can still be a somewhat normal person. By that I mean I still want to be able to work and care for my family, including you Dad and yet still have a little freedom. I haven't decided whether to take the Alpha position because of Sam. We had a difference of opinion about my situation and we argued."

"I see. Well, let me explain some things to you son. Just because you've agreed to become Chief doesn't mean that you'll lose your free will or your freedom to be a normal man with a life and a family. If you ever decide to be the Alpha? That's another matter; Sam will have to accept your choice and step down as the current Alpha. In turn he will take whatever place at your side that you choose for him to take. You'll be Chief because you're my son, Jacob. You'll be Alpha by the Spirit's choice. There's more than one definition of the term, 'birthright'.

"I'm worried about the responsibility of that, Dad. What if I make the wrong choice and one of my Pack dies? I will be responsible for ending a life!"

"That's not the way to look at it son. Every member of the Pack understands that they each have a responsibility and a calling. They each know the risks and the danger. They also know that it is an honorable duty and only a select few are called. And that's why the Council is here Jake, to help you make certain decisions and to help you become a strong Chief and Alpha to your Tribe and Pack. Surely you must know that neither Sam nor I ever made any important decisions without gaining what insight and wisdom we could from the Elders."

Billy spoke to his son with compassion and conviction. Jacob seemed relieved at the support and encouragement.

"Alright then, what do I need to do now?"

"Jacob? Is there anything else you need to tell me or want to know before we get into the wedding plans and other ceremonies needed?"

Billy had noticed his son's fidgety behavior and Jacob suddenly realized that he couldn't sneak anything past his father who knew him like a favorite novel. He couldn't look his dad in the eyes because of the shame he was feeling at the moment. Billy had never seen his son like this and so he wheeled his chair closer to take his son's strong hand in his withered one and asked him again.

"Son you know you can tell me anything right? You know that I will never judge you or turn my back on you no matter what. Talk to me son. I can feel that you are carrying a heavy burden within your heart and it has nothing to do with your tribal responsibilities. Please let me help you, even if all I can offer is a shoulder to lean on; lean on me son."

Jake took a deep shuddering breath and steeled himself to reveal his shame and weakness to his father, his Chief.

"I-I,...oh God! I do need you Dad! I am fighting a battle that is so tiring, so draining and I feel that once you know the truth, you will hate me."

"I could never hate you son! I love you so much and I am here for you always. C'mere my boy."

Billy spoke with such strength and held out his arms to offer his embrace. Jacob moved onto his knees on the floor in front of his chair and allowed him to hold him closely while he told his father what Victoria had done to him. They cried together never once breaking the hug and shared each other's pain. Billy was worried for his son but knew he was a strong Alpha and could handle whatever life threw at him. Jacob was ready to lead his Tribe and his Pack, Billy knew this in his soul. All he needed to do now was convince Jake.

"I-I'm sorry Dad, I feel like a failure and I'm scared!"

His child was sobbing as Billy stroked his head. His voice was not judging or damning, but firm and loving. He needed to reassure the young man that he had not lost faith in him.

"Jacob Ephraim Black, you must look at me this instant. You are NOT a failure, nor could you ever be. You are strong and brave beyond your years. You have an old soul and I believe in you son! Your Tribe believes in you as does your Bella. You are a strong man and will be a great leader. You have faced a tremondous test and come out of it stronger than before. You have shared your fears with your family and pack and this shows that you are meant to lead our people. You have shown great courage in speaking with me about this today and I am truly proud of my son. You have grown into a strong and caring person who we will all follow without hesitation."

The current Quileute Chief hugged his son tightly and placed a tender kiss on his forehead.

"Thank you for believing in me when I was afraid to believe in myself. I love you Dad and I will make you even prouder of me. I will become Alpha and I will name Embry as my Beta and Sam my third. What do you think?"

"I think you have made an excellent choice. Why Embry?"

Billy seemed nervous as he queried his son's decision.

"Embry's my best friend Dad and he has been since the day I was born. He's a few months older then me and he's been there for me through everything. As for Sam, I still want him there just in case, ya know? To give advice when I need it. I don't want to waste all of Sam's experience."

Billy exhaled nervously. He knew one day it might happen, he just wasn't expecting it to happen this soon. Billy was a little worried that perhaps the past was coming back to bite him.

"Alright, since you have chosen; after your honeymoon and you are settled with your family, you will need to announce it at a tribal bonfire publicly acknowledging them as your second and third."

"So now that that's settled, let's talk wedding!"

Billy Black had to laugh at his son's turn around into an excited young Romeo.

"Okay, first you two need to have a normal engagement party, then the wedding. After that 'The Chieftain Ceremony' will take place. It's a Tribal ceremony that only the Tribe is allowed to witness. I know what you are going to ask me and yes, Charlie will be allowed to witness this because he will also be becoming a part of the Tribe once you marry Bella. So our secret will be protected with the process of shifting power from one Chief to another and one Alpha to the other is only witnessed by the Council, the Tribe and the Pack. That must be done before your honeymoon. The children will be looked after by Charlie, Sue and me. We're giving Rachel and Emily time to be with their mates so they can have a break. Besides the grandparents want to spend time with the young ones. Back to the wedding; it happens first and then when you walk into your home with Bella, you are considered bound forever as husband and wife. Now because you are going to be Chief, you cannot have sex with Bella until after the Chieftain Ceremony. Once that's over and you are announced as Chief of the people, you can go on your honeymoon and bind her to you in that way understand? So it's a little different from a normal wedding. You will have to go through purification after the wedding but before the Ceremony for Chief. You can have guests here for the wedding but after that you will be taken to our Sacred Place where you will enter the Circle of Fire. There you will stand for three hours, alone in the circle. After that's done you will be taken back to your people dressed as Chief and then Bella will accept you as such in front of everyone in attendance. All of the wedding party and guests will be present for this. Then finally the reception takes place and then your honeymoon okay? Any questions you need answers to?"

Chief Black's young son seemed a little unsteady and shell-shocked.

"Ummm..Circle of Fire? What's that for?"

"It's a rite of passage for a new chief and it's neccessary as you become the new Alpha. You must stand in the Circle for three hours, no food or water and no interference from anyone. If you can survive this test then you are truly meant to lead. It's a test of strength and stamina; but also the truth, honor and faith in your heart, Jacob. I have faith in you. You will pass this test, I know it in my heart."

"I understand Dad and I will abide by the laws and rules of the Tribe. Bella would like to have the Cullens at the wedding and I told her it was okay with me; but will it be okay with the Council?"

"Actually they have to be present because once you are Chief and Alpha, Carlisle has to renew the treaty between his coven, the Pack and the Tribe."

"Alright then. They will be invited to the wedding and reception. So all the guests have to stay until all three ceremonies are completed right?"

"All the guests may stay, yes; except outsiders who aren't in the know about the treaty will be sequestered in the Council Hall for those parts that must be kept secret. The reception can be held there and we'll just tell everyone that there are pictures being taken. That will come before you leave with Bella; we'll pull whomever the treaty concerns to a separate location and sign the document. You can write up a new one or keep it the same; it's up to you."

"I don't think we really need to change much; although I do intend to add to it that the Tribe and all of our descendents are to be left unharmed by them and their kind for eternity."

"Agreed. Once everything starts the Reservation will be closed and no one may enter or leave until we're done."

"Understood."

"Sue will make the tribal outfits for you and Bella to wear for all of the ceremonies, particularly the Chief's outfit. I see your hair has gotten longer."

"Yes, it has. I haven't cut it in ten months; since Bells and I got together."

Once more, the young buck sported a big grin across his face. His father tried to be patient. He remembered.

"Don't cut it at all okay? It needs to be long."

"Yes Dad, I won't cut my hair at all then."

"I'm proud of you my son; you've become a man and you have honored me as your father."

"Thanks Dad. I'm gonna head on home now to be with my mate and pups."

"We'll start planning the wedding and invitations alright?"

"Sure, sure. Thank you for being my dad and for being here for me."

"Anytime son."

Billy shook Jake's hand and smiled when his son followed the mature gesture with a still childish hug.

JACOB'S POV

My dad waved goodbye to me as I headed back home to Bella. I walked home more confident in my choices and myself as a person because my dad listened and helped me through everything. From becoming Chief and Alpha; to Victoria's attack, his faith in me never wavered. I thought about my mom and decided to get her some flowers and go visit her before the wedding. I wished so badly to have my mom there to see me get married, but alas it wouldn't happen.

How I would delight in seeing her and my father sitting side by side as their only son gets married. 'I miss you mom!' I reached the burial ground and walked over to the headstone which marked her grave. I went to my knees and ran my fingers across the letters chisled into the granite, Sarah Black, Beloved wife and mother. I placed the flowers gently against it and sighed.

'So Mom, I brought you some tiger lilies, your favorite. I miss you so much! I wanted you to be here to see me on my wedding day but I know you can't. God! I wish you could be here to see your grandson and grandaughter. Christiana looks a lot like Bella but she has your soaring spirit and she feels so much like you. Her presence is comforting to my soul and maybe a part of you is in her. It may seem silly to think that, but I truly believe in my heart that the Spiritual part of you walks this earth at this very moment. Joseph, well he's an exact copy of me; which in turn means he has your features just as I do. He smiles and acts like me; he has a caring personality which is hard to see right now because he's still an infant; but it's there. They both talk to me in my head and tell me how much they love Bella and me. The way their littles eyes light up when we walk into the room is amazing! I wish you could see that. I know I'm rambling on and I'm sorry I haven't been here to see you in a while. I'm sure you know what I went through and I hope you aren't disappointed in how I handled it, or didn't handle it. I'm actually much stronger now because of it and I can stand proudly as the future Chief and Alpha of our Tribe and Pack now. I hope you will always be proud to call me your son and even though you aren't here physically anymore, I think I can feel your pride and your love. Thanks Mom.'

I had been sitting in thought for a few minutes when the breeze kicked up and it sounded like a whisper in the trees to my ears. My whole body warmed and it was as if I felt gentle arms wrapped lovingly around me, hugging me tightly. It startled me but it felt so very familiar, and I knew my mother was there with me in spirit. I seemed to be in a waking sleep, and I heard her voice clearly.

'Oh! My Little Wolf, don't be sad. I am always proud of you and I love you too my wolfson. You have grown into a fine man; one I am honored to call Son. I am glad you and Bella have found each other. And I am always here because I'm a part of Rebecca, Rachel, you Jacob, Joseph and Christiana. They are beautiful and strong children. They will make you proud son, as you have made me. I am part of all five of you; a little piece of me lives on inside each of you and will continue. You see Jacob, I will be able to see you get married because all who share my blood carry me with them always. Even Quil V your cousin, we are of the same blood.'

The errant thought came unbidden to Jacob's mind. He tried but couldn't contain its escape.

'I know Mom. Quil is a butthead at best but he is my cousin.'

'Jacob Ephraim Black! Be nice to the members of your family! I seem to remember that cousin of yours has had your flank on more than one occassion, and your back as well.'

'Yes, Mom he has; and I'm sure he will continue to do so.'

'There is one other who has your back and always has since you were born. Speak to me of Embry.'

'He's doing alright; his mom can't seem to settle down with the guy she's been with but other then that all is good with him. He stays with us when Tiffany is out of town for weeks on end and we take care of him like a brother.'

'I have seen the love that you two share and I'm glad that you are close, as it should be. Your father and sister Rachel have been under my watchful eyes. I feel Rebecca's yearning for home. I'm happy she and her husband will be here for the wedding and I know the pull that Rachel's roots and imprint are exerting on her.'

'Dad still loves and misses you with all his heart. I hear him at night before he sleeps, talking to you and telling you goodnight; and he does the same when he wakes each day.'

'I know he does, my son. I come to him at night and in the morning to tell him how much I love him. I walk beside him always. I have seen him acting differently lately. Do you know his mind?'

'No, not really but he did seem a little uneasy maybe; or apprehensive when I told him about picking Embry as my second and Sam as my third. I dunno why. Maybe he feels Sam would be better suited for second because he has previous experience at leading the pack? I'm not sure why. I will have to ask him one day.'

'Yes, you should ask him one day. Right now you have many more important things to do; but don't dismiss Embry. He is meant to walk through life with you and he always will, he just doesn't know it yet.'

'Oh no, Mom! I would never ignore or turn my back on Embry! He has been with me since the day I was born and he's my best friend. Embry,Quil and I are the Three Musketeers! We will never leave each other, ever!'

'I am glad you three are so close. You will need each other and that closeness soon. Be there for Embry, Jacob; he will need you soon and so will your father and never forget forgiveness is a strength in a Chief and Alpha.'

'I won't forget Mom, and I promise you; I will be there for Embry and Dad. I swear on my life and the love of my family that I will be there for them both.'

'Now I must leave you, Son. Your family awaits your return. Go with my love for you all. Come see me again soon. I will be waiting to hear more about my family. Give everyone I love hugs and kisses from me, okay my Little Wolf?'

'I will Mom, everyday, I promise. I love you too and will miss you.'

'We won't say goodbye because this is not permanant. I will say see you soon my wolfson, my heart.'

'See you soon Momma, I love you.'

'My love goes with you always; and Jacob, please tell Embry I send my love to him too.'

'Okay, Mom, I will. Is there something I should know about Embry that you're not telling me? If there is, please tell me now.'

'No questions now, Jacob. I have always thought of Embry as my own son and will continue to do so. Do you understand me?'

'Yes, ma'am, I understand. I will tell him. I'm sorry if I was being inconsiderate.'

'You are forgiven, this time. But next time I may ignore you when you call me, youngling.'

'Yes Momma, I get it...won't happen again, I promise.'

I felt the breeze again and another hug and then she was gone. I took a deap breath and tried not to cry as I stood up brushed myself off. Smiling lovingly at the thoughts from my mother, I turned toward home. When I got to the cabin and walked into the kitchen; the girls were busy making plans and discussing the guest list, music, flowers and where to go on our honeymoon. I felt a little out of place but I couldn't have been more excited than I was right now.

A/N: I know! I know! Stop throwing the rotten fruit at me! I am sorry for the cliffy. Hmmmm.. a lot of things happened in this chapter; any guesses as to what's going on? I think Sarah explained it in a nutshell. Will Jacob figure out his mom's cryptic message and his dad's cryptic behavior? Why the concern about Embry being Beta? Why not Sam? How will this effect Jacob's life? Well my lovlies there is some food for thought. LOL. Have fun figuring this out! I can't wait to hear your responses. Please read and review, it makes my day and makes me write even more.

TTFN!

Alixandria