Chapter Thirteen

I made it upstairs and I could hear Renesme talking with Jacob, Emmett, and Rose. They were talking about what high school would be like. And it finally hit me that my little girl will be starting high school soon. She's officially not my little girl anymore. I knocked on the door as I entered the room.

"Mom!" Renesme immediately ran to me and hugged me. I hugged her back holding her tightly. I kissed her forehead softly.

"Are you okay darling?" I asked still holding her.

"Yes mom, I'm fine." She said pulling from me gently. I touched her check softly pushing some hair out of her face.

"I'm so glad that you are my love." I said smiling a little. I heard Rose chuckled a little. I looked back at her and glared at her. She stared back at me with the same look.

"Um maybe we should give them some privacy, come on Rose let's step out for a bit; you too Jacob." Emmett came to my rescue.

"Yeah whatever." Rose said leaving the room, Emmett left right behind her and so did Jacob. Jacob looked back at us before leaving and I smiled and nodded at him. Thanks to him and his efforts they were able to find Renesme before anything happened to her. He was able to do something that Edward and I as her parents failed to do. I will always be forever grateful to Jacob; I never have to worry about him hurting her.

"Dad apologized to me." Renesme said breaking my train of thought.

"Did he? Did he say anything else?" I asked wondering how much she knew of the situation. Renesme isn't a stupid girl, matter of fact she's very intelligent and I know she must know something is going on.

"He said he was going to be going away for a while, I tried to ask him what was going on but he wouldn't tell me. He just said he needs some time to clear his mind so he was taking a trip." So he didn't really tell her much.

"Oh is that so?" I said looking down.

"Mom what is going on? Why is dad leaving? It's not because of me is it? He says it's not but I'm not so sure if I believe him." She said looking at me sadly.

"No baby, it's not because of you. Your dad and I are having problems that we're having a difficult time sorting through and he just needs some time to cool off. I'm sure he will come around." At least I hope he does.

"Why are you guys having problems?" She asked. I didn't want to tell her. I can't tell her. She doesn't need to know.

"It's nothing you need to worry about sweetie. We're going to get through this I promise." I said kissing her forehead again. She sighed deeply and I'm not so sure if she believed me about that. I'm not even sure if I believe myself.

JPOV

"Jasper, I really think you should go talk to Edward." Carlisle and I were in the living room alone. Esme went off to go talk to Alice and Bella was upstairs talking with Renesme.

"There's nothing for me to talk about with him. I'm the last person he wants to talk to."

"Well we can't let things carry on like this. What if he doesn't return if he leaves?" Carlisle egged on.

"There's nothing I can do." I said firmly.

"You could at least try." Emmett entered the room. I looked up at him, his eyes had anger in them but he also looked very sad.

"Try for what Emmett? He won't listen. My efforts would be useless and time wasting." I said

"Trying to fix our family is useless and time wasting to you? You caused this problem so you need to fix it." He said angrily.

"I've done all that I can!" I protested.

"Which was nothing Jasper; all you've done was fight with Edward! You two haven't fully sat down and talked this out!" Emmett said.

"What is there to talk about? Bella and I had sex! There's no sugar coating that and there's not changing that, it happened and he knows it! So what is there for us to talk about? Absolutely nothing." I said.

"So you're just going to let this family break apart?" Emmett was not going to let this go.

"Damnit Emmett what do you want me to do? Just drop it okay! I don't need this from you!" I yelled. I was fed up with this.

"You don't need to talk to him like that; he's only trying to help!" Rose was quickly in the room to jump to his defense.

"There's nothing to help, what's done is done." I said calming down a little.

"Will everyone just calm down? We are going to get through this okay?" Carlisle jumped in to ease some of the tension. I sighed, I hate that I was in this mess; I even hate it more that I put Bella into this mess. I know she must really hate me. I would hate me if I was her.

"If I could fix things so that nobody would be upset I would. But I don't regret what I did with Bella. I love her and I would do it again if I had the chance. That's just how I honestly feel and I won't apologize for that." I said feeling bold.

"You love her? What brought all of this?" Carlisle asked.

"Ha! You're joking right? You cannot be serious Jasper? How can you love her? She's married to Edward and you're supposed to be with Alice!" Rosalie exclaimed.

"I don't feel for Alice that way anymore." I said.

"And why not? What happened?" Emmett asked shocked.

"I just don't. I don't feel that spark with her anymore! When I was with Bella everything felt alright, nothing else mattered in the world but her!" I couldn't believe I was saying these things out loud.

"You're a joke!" Rose said angrily.

"Shut up Rose, you don't know anything." I spat back at her.

"I know that you're a home wrecker and you're about to destroy this coven! And how the hell were you going to explain any of this to Nessie? That you and her mother have been screwing around and that her mother is going to leave her father to be with her uncle? Do you hear how ridiculous that sounds?" Rose was really picking at me.

"Renesme and I have no blood relation to each other." I simply said.

"Edward is your brother!" Rose shot back.

"No he is not damnit! No he is not! I have no relation to him or any of you! You're all connected to Carlisle because he created you all! I was not created by Carlisle so therefore I don't have any real connection to any of you." I couldn't believe I just said that.

"I wasn't created by Carlisle, Rose created me." Emmett said he eyes were filled with hurt.

"But Rose was created by Carlisle; without Carlisle there would be no Rose, without Rose there would be no you. So you too have a connection to him. But me, I have nothing." I said looking down.

"You're still my brother no matter what Jasper, stop talking like this. You're sounding like you don't want to be a part of this coven." Emmett said.

"If I'm going to be shunned or looked as the bad guy because of how I feel then no, I don't want to be a part of this coven. I love that girl and I won't stop trying to be with her. And I don't care how any of you feel about that. If I being with Bella break this coven apart so be it." I said coldly.

"You shut your mouth right now." And then she appeared. Renesme was holding her hand and she was looking at me as if she was wishing I would drop dead right here, right now.

BPOV

"Mom what is he talking about?" Renesme looked up at me and asked.

"I want you to go back home with Jacob, do you understand me?" I ignored her question. I was furious. I heard every single thing Jasper said and so did Renesme. I did not want her brought into this nonsense.

"I heard my name." Jacob was immediately in the room.

"Make sure she gets back home okay." I said looking at Jacob.

"No problem. Come on Nes, let's blow this joint." Jacob reached his hand out for her to grab. She looked hesitant but I gave her the "Not now" look and she understood and left with Jacob. After they left I looked up at Jasper and the next thing I knew my hand went so hard across his face.

"So now you're bringing my daughter into this madness! Have you completely lost your mind Jasper?" I was beyond furious at this point.

"I'm sorry Bella." He said looking down.

"I can't believe the things you were saying down here! This coven is our family! You wouldn't be alive right now, spitting this nonsense if it wasn't for this coven!" I yelled at him.

"And you're so quick to defend this very same coven that's about to shun you for doing the unthinkable with me." He grinned a little.

"I know what I did was wrong! At least I'm trying to fix it, all you're doing is just making things worst. Remember what I told you? You are nothing without the Cullens! You will not survive without your coven." I said.

"Bullshit!" His grin completely faded.

"What do you want from me Jasper?" I was growing tired of this.

"I want you to admit that you have some sort of feelings for me!" He replied.

"Jasper, stop this man, this is not right!" Emmett jumped in.

"He's right Jasper." Carlisle added.

"I can feel that you do Bella. I felt it when we made love. The way you called my name out that way. You wouldn't have done that if you didn't feel something for me." He looked so sad.

"This is sickening. I can't take any more of this. I'm going to go check on Alice" Rose said leaving the room.

"I was vulnerable and weak then." I said softly.

"Are you using that as an excuse to hide from your true feelings?" He asked. Damn it all. I have to admit that, that night was amazing and I felt things I've never felt with Edward before. Does that mean I have feelings for Jasper? Because that wasn't just sex. We made love that night. Damn it all.

"I love you Jasper, but not like that. I'm sorry." I said ignoring the emotional battle going on inside of my head. If I admit to having some sort of feelings for him, he won't let this go and that's the last thing I need right now.

"You're lying, and you and I both know this." He looked me straight in the eye.

"I can't do this right now." I took for the door and ran away. I'm such a coward. Instead of fixing my problems I run from them. That's all I seem to do now a days. I'm pathetic.

JPOV

Oh no she don't. I'm not going to let her get away with this one. I almost had her. She was going to admit it. She was going to admit that she had feelings for me. I took off after her. She didn't get too far because I could smell her. I knew where she was going anyway. She always goes to that creek whenever something is bothering her. I caught up to her and saw her running.

"Bella! Bella please just stop!" I called after her.

"Just leave me alone Jasper." She called back. We both kept running. We were in the forest now dodging trees and bushes. I staid right on her heels. I wasn't going to let her go. I was almost close enough to touch her.

"Jasper, please just go!" I knew she could feel me gaining on her. I grabbed her arm and we both came to a huge halt. I kept my grip on her tight.

"Let me go please." Her voice cracked. It sounded like she wanted to cry.

"Not until you listen to me first." I said.

"I don't want to hear anything you have to say Jasper! You've ruined everything that's precious to me! I'm sure Renesme knows what's going on; she's not a stupid girl!" She said sounding broken. I let her go and she turned to face me.

"I'm sorry." I didn't know what else to say.

"If you're sorry then you will leave me alone Jasper." She said.

"I can't, I'm sorry but I just can't do that! I won't live without you Isabella!" I said grabbing her hands.

"Please don't make me do this Jasper. I love my husband! And I love Alice and I don't want to hurt her any more than I already have." She exclaimed.

"I just want you to admit that you feel something for me Bella."

"I can't do that."

"Why Bella?"

"Because I can't." She said looking down. My grip on her hands grew tighter.

"Why not damnit!"

"Because if I do it would be the truth! It will finally be a reality and all my problems will just grow more if I admit that! I don't want to feel this way about you but I do okay! I have feelings for you Jasper!" I knew it. I didn't know what else to do; I couldn't believe that she finally admitted that. I felt like my body had a mind of its own because I pulled Bella closed to me and I kissed her. At first she resisted but then she deepened the kiss. I let her hands go and she wrapped her arms around my neck I placed my hands at her hips pulling her closer to my body. She moaned a little and that made my body tingle. I licked her lower lip and she opens her mouth slightly and I slid my tongue into her mouth. My tongue quickly found hers and they danced slowly with each other. I held on to her tightly not wanting this moment to ever end. She pulled away softly.

"I can't do this." She whispered breathing heavily.

"I'm sorry, I couldn't help myself." I said brushing my hand across her cheek. She looked down.

"Are you happy now? I finally admitted to have feelings for you Jasper." She whispered.

"I know you do. You would have pulled back a long time ago during that kiss if you didn't feel anything for me." I said smiling at her. I felt so victorious.

"But just because I have feelings for you doesn't mean I'm going to act out on those feelings. This won't happen again. Like I said I love my husband and my love him are way stronger for these feelings I have for you." She said pulling back from my touch.

"I'm not giving up on you Bella. That's a promise." I said.

"I'm not leaving Edward, that's a promise. Good bye Jasper." She replied and with that she left. I smiled. I felt like I won a great battle in this confusing, huge war. I'm not giving up on her. Not by a long shot. I will make Isabella Swan mine, if it's the last thing I do. I made this promise to myself as I made my way back to the main house.