Chapter Fifteen
I was sitting out there for at least two hours before Jacob came to find me. I didn't even realize how long I was sitting out here. There was so many things just running through my mind and it felt like the thoughts were never-ending.
"Hey Bells, how are you holding up?" Jake asked sitting next to me.
"Why did you leave Renesme alone?" I asked him still looking out at the creek.
"She fell asleep. Today really took a toll on her. She tried to wait until you got back but she didn't make it. So I put her to bed." He replied.
"Oh okay. Thank you Jacob." I sighed.
"You still haven't answered my question Bella." He said brushing off my gratitude.
"I'm okay Jake." I said emotionless.
"Liar," He said nudging my shoulder with his elbow.
"I'm not going to talk about this with you Jacob. It's none of your business." I said rolling my eyes.
"So it is all true then. You cheated with Jasper?"
"Jacob, I said I'm not talking about this with you." I said through gritted teeth.
"I'm sorry Bella. It's just so much has been happening over the past few days and I'm just now letting everything sink in with me. No matter what though, I will always have your back Bella." He assured me. I can always count on my Jake no matter. He's always my warm and bright sun on the coldest and darkest of days.
"Thanks Jake. That means a lot." I said leaning my head on his shoulder.
"Things are going to be okay. Edward will be back. He just needs to let off some steam that's all." He whispered. I really hope more than anything that he's right. I hope Edward comes back to me soon. I really want to fix all this with him. For a while Jake and I sat there in silence and for the first time in a long time I felt at ease.
"Hey Jake?" I whispered.
"Yeah what's up?" He asked.
"Do you plan on being with Renesme for the rest of your life?" I asked him.
"Of course, I love her with all my being. I do want to marry her someday maybe even have a family with her too." He replied. It didn't take him too long to answer me neither. It really makes me feel assured that Renesme will always have Jacob by her side no matter what. I hope he really meant that.
"Don't ever hurt her. Don't hurt her like I hurt you, and like I hurt Edward." I whispered.
"Bella, please don't talk about this right now. I just want you to relax." Jacob said wrapping an arm around me, trying to calm me down.
"I just don't want Renesme to feel the kind of pain that I put you and him through. I want her to always be happy." I said still whispering.
"Bella please, just stop." He said pulling away from me. I could tell he was getting upset.
"Jake, I'm only sayin –" He cut me off.
"What you did to me is in the past, I'm over it! I got over it just like how Edward is going to get over this! Stop stressing yourself over something that's done and over with! I won't sit here and have this pity party with you." He said getting up from where we were sitting.
"Why are you getting so upset right now?" I said getting up too.
"Just forget it. I'm going to go check on Renesme. Don't stay out here for too long." He said before leaving briskly. I sighed and just hid my face in my hands.
JPOV
"Alice!" I yelled through the woods. I've been searching for her for at least thirty minutes now. Her room was still filled with her things so I'm not sure if that was a sign that she was coming back or not. I don't know what she's up to but if she dies because of this I will never forgive myself.
"Alice please! Don't do this!" I yelled so more. Where on earth could she be?
"What is going on?" I turned around and I saw Bella looking at me confused and dazed.
"I can't find Alice, have you seen her?" I asked her.
"She came to see me about half an hour ago and then she left." She replied. Why would she stop to see Bella before leaving?
"Did she say where she was going?" I asked.
"No she didn't. Something didn't seem right about her when she was telling me goodbye now that I think about it."
"What do you mean?"
"She just didn't seem herself." She replied.
"I need to find her!" I said feeling myself getting frantic.
"Why? What's going on Jasper?" She asked.
"I think she's going to try to kill herself. I need to hurry and find her right away before she makes a huge mistake." I said.
"Do you want me to help?" She asked looking up at me. My heart jumped a little by the way she looked at me. No Jasper, this is what got you into this situation.
"No, I need to do this on my own. I don't think seeing us, together would do her any good. If anything it would make the situation worse, I don't know what kind of mindset she would be in when I find her." I said carefully.
"I guess you're right. I'll go back to the main house and alert the others and send someone to help." She replied.
"That sounds better, very well then." I said. She looked at me and gave me a half smile and then left. What was that all about? I brushed it off and went back to searching for Alice. I just hope that she's alright.
JPOV (Jacob)
I made it back to the cottage. Renesme was asleep when I left but now she was up in her room lying in her bed clutching her pillow. When she looked up at me she had tears in her eyes.
"Nes what's wrong?" I asked.
"Nothing." She sniffed and wiped her eyes.
"You're obviously lying. You know you can talk to me about anything. So start talking, what's wrong?" I asked again.
"Do you think my dad is going to come back?" She asked looking up at me. Of course this would be bothering her.
"Renesme what's going on with your parents have nothing to do with you. Your mom made a terrible mistake which caused your dad to leave. But he's going to come back. Maybe it's best that he left so that he can calm down and then fix things with her." I said.
"I just can't believe that my mom did that with uncle Jasper. Like what was she thinking?" She said as more tears dropped from her eyes.
"I don't know Nes, everyone makes mistake. She's not perfect you know." I said looking down.
"Are you defending her right now?" She asked me.
"I'm not saying what she did was right but you can't be entirely pissed off at her." I said.
"She's the reason why my dad left. I have every right to be pissed off at her." She rolled her eyes.
"Renesme, you're being irrational." I said.
"Excuse me?" She said looking at me upset.
"You're not thinking with a clear mind." I said tying to defuse the situation.
"Get out!" She yelled at me.
"Renesme just calm down please." I said putting my hands up in defense.
"I said get out! Now!" She threw her pillow at me.
"Renesme damnit don't do this!" I pleaded with her.
"I want you to leave now Jacob!" She yelled at me as tears were starting to roll down her face again. Then she starts to beat on my chest crying harder.
"I'm not leaving you while you're like this. I'm not leaving you alone Renesme." I said sitting there letting her beat on my chest. I let her get out all her anger and frustration out on me. I knew she was angry and upset about everything so I let her get it all out on me. I would be her punching bag all night if I need to be.
"Why did she have to do that? My dad did not deserve any of that! Sure he's been a real jerk to us lately but he still did not deserve that! I will never forgive her for this!" She cried out still punching me. I grabbed her hands and just pulled her into me.
"Just cry it out baby girl. I'm not going anywhere. I'm going to always be here for you. I love you so much." I said patting her head soothingly.
"I love you too Jake." She whispered into my chest. She looked up at me and smiled a little. I wiped away a few of her remaining tears that were falling down her cheeks. She placed her hand on top of mine on her cheek and held it there. I leaned down and I kissed her softly and she kissed me back. Red alarms were going off in my head. We were not supposed to be doing this but I cannot help myself right now. I want her so bad. She leaned in closer and deepened our kiss as she wrapped her arms around my neck. I pulled her closer never wanting to let her go every again. I could feel her heart racing a little.
"I want you to make love to me Jake." She whispered pulling away from our kiss.
"Are you sure that's what you really want?" I asked her biting my lip.
"Yes Jacob, please; I'm ready. Just take me now while we can." She said and then she kissed me again and I couldn't resist. I wanted her just as bad as she wanted me. She leaned down lying on the bed taking me with her. She licked the bottom of my lip while we kissed to get me to open my mouth so that she could slide her tongue in. Our tongues easily found each other and they were tangled within each other. She moaned a little as I rubbed my hand up and down her body. She was so warm and I loved it. Her hand moved up and down my stomach until she reaches the hem of my jeans. She slowly slid her hand down them and grabbed my throbbing cock. I moaned a little and I could feel her smiling at my lips as we continued to kiss.
We pulled away from each other and I started to kiss her neck as I took her shirt and bra off. I sucked and nibble and she starting to run her hands down my back. I kissed her from her neck down to her chest. Her body was incredible even though she was considered young. She had the body of a goddess. I licked at her nipples and she moan at little as I bit down softly on them sucking softly.
"Yes Jake, please I can't take this anymore. I want you!" She moaned out. I looked up at her and smiled as I kissed down her stomach to the hem of her shorts. I pulled her shorts down along with her panties. She was soaking wet and the smell of her was heaven. I never smelled anything so amazing in my life. She was completely bald down there which for some reason turned me on even more. I slid my tongue inside of her along with a finger and she cried out as I moved in rhythm in and out of her. I suck on her clit as I slide another finger inside of her she was so freaking tight which drove me crazy.
"Oh Jake that feels so good; I'm going insane." She moaned grabbing her breast as I moved my fingers quicker.
"I think I'm going to cum. I feel so hot Jake!" She yelled out. And then as I slid my tongue in again I could feel her wetness spurt out everywhere. Wow she's a squirter. She cried out loud as she erupted like a hot volcano. We were both panting heavily as she finished.
"I can't believe that just happen." She said still trying to catch her breath.
"I can't believe that you are able to do that." I said licking my lips. I wanted more, I wasn't finished at all.
"That's not the only thing I can do." She smiled as she got on top of me kissing me softly then leaving my lips; she ripped my shirt off viciously which turned me on even more. Her tongue trailed down my stomach to the hem of my jeans, I easily slid them off while she finds her way to my hard cock. I watched her carefully as she took all of me into her hand. She looked at me and smiled and then I was overtaken by her mouth. First she was only sucking the tip and then she started to swallow me whole. Where the hell did she learn how to do that? I groaned softly as she moved up and down on my cock in rhythm with her hand while she sucked. I've never experienced a sensation like this before. This feeling is so foreign to me. But I love it, it felt addicting. Like I could feel this way all day every day and I would never be tired of it.
"I want you now Renesme." I groaned.
"Then take me Jacob." She said smiling sexily at me. I grabbed her and we switched sides she was now on the bottom and I was on top getting ready to make my way inside of her. The thought of being connected with Renesme like that made my heart speed. She softly placed one of her hands on my cheek, she was communicating to me her way. She was wondering if it was going to hurt. Of course she would be worried about that. After all this is her first time.
"It may just a little, are you sure you're ready for this? We'll go super slow and super easy." I assured her as I rubbed my cock up and down her wet pussy. She smiled and nodded and I knew I had the okay to go on. I slowly and gently inched my cock inside of her. She cried out and I stopped.
"No it's okay. It's like a good pain." She gasped.
"Are you sure Nes? We can stop." I said getting ready to pull out but she grabbed my butt and pushed me further into her. She cried out, damn she's so tight.
"I'm inside of you Nessie." I said thrusting gently.
"I know it feels so good but it also hurts so badly." I could see the tears pooling in her eyes.
"We can stop. I don't want to hurt you." I started to smell the blood that was coming from her pussy. I popped her cherry. I've heard stories about that from my brothers but this is my first time ever experiencing it.
"No please don't stop Jake, I want more." She gently started to move as well so that I could thrust deeper inside of her. Damn she felt so good but I also know that she's in pain. Even if she wanted to stop I don't think I could stop. I leaned up and grabbed her hips as we both started moving together. We were both breathing heavy and starting to sweat. I feel like I'm going to explode. Just watching her look up at me with that sexy look was enough to make me explode.
"I think I'm going to cum again Jake!" She cried out.
"Yeah me too!" I moaned out. We both were moaning as I moved quicker, the sound of our skin hitting each other set me over the edge and before I knew it I came and Renesme did too at the same time. She squirted all over me and I didn't even get a chance to pull out. I collapsed next to her and we both tried to catch out breaths.
We were both covered and sweat and her squirt. The scent of it all was just like a drug to me. I never want to forget this scent. I never want to forget this moment even if I may regret it later on I never want to forget.
"I love you so much Jake." Renesme whispered and she laid her head on my chest.
"I love you too Renesme. I'll always will." I whispered back wrapping an arm around her.
BPOV
I made it back to the main house. And I gather everyone to the living room.
"What's going on?" Esme asked.
"Jasper can't find Alice and I think she's about to do something dangerous." I said.
"Dangerous like that what?" Carlisle was immediately concerned.
"I think she's going to try to kill herself!" I replied.
"What!" Esme gasped.
"I wouldn't blame the poor girl if she did. After all she was betrayed by the ones that supposed to be her family. That would drive anyone to suicide." Rosalie added.
"Shut up Rose." I barked at her.
"Excuse me! I hope you know that this is all your fault! If something happens to Alice I will never forgive you!" She barked back at me.
"I'm not asking for your forgiveness nor do I wish to have it Rosalie. We have to go out and find her, that's all that matters right now!" I said rolling my eyes.
"None of this would be even happening if you weren't slutting around with Jasper!" She spat at me. I had enough of her, without even thinking about it my hand went across her face so quickly and furiously that I thought her whole head was going to spin around.
"You bitch!" She yelled and she tried to grab me but Emmett stopped her.
"Let go of me!" She cried out.
"Rosalie, please calm down!" Emmett begged her!
"She should be kicked out of this covet! Look at the mess she made!" She yelled still trying to get away from Emmett.
"She did not act alone Rosalie! She resisted me at first but I tempted her! So this is my fault not hers! So if you want to kick someone out kick me out!" Jasper instantly walked through the door and Rosalie stopped struggling and she was calming down, I guess Jasper had something to do with that.
"Jasper, please just don't." I said.
"I'm serious Bella. This is all my fault! I should have left you alone the first time you told me to. But I couldn't get you out of my mind. I had to have you or I felt like I was going to die. I'm so sorry, I'm sorry for everything Bella, and if you seriously want me to leave this covet and never come back I will. I will do that for you." He said looking me straight in the eye.
"Jasper, please. We just have to find Alice right now. That's the only thing I'm worried about right now." I said looking away.
"Yeah I guess you're right. Carlisle what should we do? I looked everywhere for her and I can't find her anywhere" He said.
"We're all going to split up and look for her, but Bella I want you to stay here just in case she comes back." Carlisle said giving everyone direction.
"I understand." I nodded.
"Okay everyone spread out, you know what to do and if any of you find her or something that's going to help us find her make sure you contact everyone else right away!" Carlisle ordered. Everyone nodded and then quickly left. I sighed and sat down on the couch in the living room. Will things ever go back to normal? Will we get through this okay? It seems that I bring more bad than good to this covet. I just hope Alice is safe and that she will be able to forgive me. I hope everyone will find it in their hearts to forgive me.