TWO

Or will you stay

Even if it hurts

Even if I try to push you out

Will you return?

And remind me who I really am

Please remind me who I really am

Everybody's got a dark side

Do you love me?

Can you love mine?

Nobody's picture perfect

But we're worth it

You know that we're worth it

Will you love me?

Even with my dark side?

- "Dark Side," Kelly Clarkson

Life was interesting, Loki reflected as he led Alana through the maze of corridors. Just when he had thought that he was prepared to do anything, she appeared, and the memories that he had tried to suppress had come rushing back like a flood.

I will always bring you back to the light, she had said. What would she think of him now? Of his darkness, his fury and rage? He had not expected this; thought he had conquered the pain, tempered it with rage and fire. When he had watched Alana walk away from the hospital he had never really thought that he would see her again. He had resigned himself to his hatred, his dark future, his imprisonment. Faking his death, preparing to kill Odin… but then she had appeared, and the pain of her loss had hit him hard. He wanted to rush to her, to take her in his arms and hold her tight, and to never, never, never let her go again.

But he could not.

She did not know him.

But she remembered his name. She hadn't forgotten him completely. And he could try, now that she was here, he could try to get her memory back.

He had been prepared to slay the Allfather, but her presence had diminished him, had made him remember how he used to be, how she had told him that he was not a monster. How she had loved him, and saved him, and kissed him late at night.

He was unsure.

He had faked his death, lied to everyone he knew, and hurt so many people because he himself was broken. Alana had been stolen, and Frigga was dead. Mother… I killed you.

But now he felt tinges of guilt, of regret, creeping up on him for things he had not regretted. Coulson's death, and New York, and the way Thanos and the Chitauri had turned him into a mindless weapon with only minimal effort. He had been so angry… Was this what Alana would have wanted for him? Would she love him as he was now, broken and dark?

He tried to convince himself that he had done it for her, so that he could find her, but his argument was feeble in his mind.

He was intrigued, as well. Her appearance on Asgard, in the room where he was, at the exact time he had been there, was more than a coincidence.

And her attire was Asgardian as well. In fact, it looked like his.

He had to look into it.

At the same time, he could not allow her to wander the palace. If Odin found her, who knew what would happen?

And Thor… he'd have to do something about Thor…

As he led Alana down the aisles of the library, she stopped him abruptly, saying, "Wait."

He turned back to look at her with reluctance, not sure if his face could hold its impassive mask, not sure if he could refrain from kissing her.

She crossed her arms. "I'm not going anywhere else until you tell me where I am and why I can't get back home."

Of course. He hadn't forgotten her stubborn streak, her resolve that he had loved.

"You are on Asgard," he said, watching her carefully for a flicker of recognition. But none came.

"And… where is that?"

"Several thousand light-years away from Earth."

Her jaw dropped and she looked at him warily. "You're an alien?"

He raised his eyebrows. "I suppose."

She broke into a wide grin, her eyes dancing with delight. "That's so cool!" Loki felt a pang in his heart, remembering the night he revealed his Jotunn form to her. Then a suspicious look flared across her face and she asked, "You're not one of those creepy ones from New York?"

Oh, no. "Of course not. Do I look a savage beast?" he said lightly.

"Well, that's a bit of an overstatement… I'm sure they had a reason. And I suppose that they aren't considered ugly in their world. But they seemed more like foot soldiers… they must have had a commander. That guy fighting Thor, maybe." He looked at her, concealing the terror he was feeling in his heart. Damn, damn, damn, what have I done? He relaxed marginally as she said, "But that's over with, so whatever, I guess." She peered at him closely. "You don't seem like a psychopath."

If she only knew…

"So how did I get here?"

"The Seven Realms are converging," he said. "Their alignment causes portals to open sometimes, from world to world. You must have walked through one."

She didn't look as fazed as she should have. Perhaps… perhaps some memory had come back to her?

"And why are you helping me, exactly?" she asked, looking a bit suspicious, and his hope died. "You said that you didn't know me."

Why does she have to be so perceptive? Even without her telepathy… damn. This is going to be harder than I thought.

"I don't," he said smoothly, erasing all doubt and hesitation from his voice. "However, in my current situation it would be bad to have a human running amok in the palace."

"Your current situation? Which would be… wait. I'm in a palace?"

He nodded and her jaw dropped again. "So let me get this straight. I walked through a portal and ended up on an alien planet, in an alien palace, with an alien who just so happens to want to help me?"

"That would… be correct, yes."

"Well," she said, laughing a little, "just another day at the…" Her voice trailed off, her eyes became unfocused. Loki looked cautiously at her.

"At… the office," she finally finished, snapping back into reality. "And what is your current situation?"

Should I lie? The lies were familiar and came easily, but he wanted her to know some portion of the truth…

He hesitated, then said, "I faked my death." The words were blunt. "And now I have to hide."

She looked a little surprised. "Fake your death? Why… why would you do something like that?"

He sighed, then reluctantly said, "Because the king would have imprisoned me if I had returned alive."

Alana took a step back from him, eyes widening. Thoughts ran through his head, wildly, unformed, speculative. Would she run?

"Why?" she asked, her voice cautiously controlled. "What did you do?"

"I… it's complicated." He turned away from her, turned away from the look in her eyes. "But what I did, I meant… I never thought…" He broke off, unable to continue, but also unable to bear the silence. "I swear that I did it for y – for love."

A hesitant hand touched his shoulder, and he wanted to flee. "I'm sorry," she whispered. "Did you love her very much?"

"More than life," he whispered.

She sighed and removed her hand. He waited for more questions, for more arguments.

None came.

"Well," she finally said, "lead on. I guess I'm your accomplice now, so it'd be good not to get caught."

He led her to a room that his mother – Frigga, remember, just Frigga, his mind told him, but his heart had been bolstered by her arrival and he doesn't care –had showed him when he was younger, only about five hundred or so. He used to hate it when his parents – not his parents – argued, and Frigga had showed him the room in which she slept after such arguments. Being married to Odin and with a lifespan of five thousand years each, the two gods had sometimes needed some time apart.

The room, now unused, was neat and tidy but had an unmistakable air of abandonment.

"You may stay here," he said, and turned, convincing himself that he was ready to leave, that he wanted to leave, but she let out a noise of indignation and said, "I don't think so. You can tell me you're an alien, that I walked through a portal, and that you're a fugitive, but no way are you leaving me here."

"I have to take care of something," he said, back still to her.

"Something, or someone?" she said in a voice full of disapproval. "Why can't you just be honest?"

Because I do not know how anymore. "I have to make sure that we will be safe here."

"Hey," she said, and grabbed his arm. "No killing. Okay? Because I can see that you've done a lot of things that most people would be ashamed of. But not anymore. Not while I'm around."

He spun, grasping her upper arms tightly and stared into her eyes. "Could you stop me?" he said, soft as a whisper, deadly as a viper. "Are you not scared?"

"Yes," she said, "and no. I am not scared of you." But the look in her eyes told him otherwise, the slight tremor in her voice betrayed her.

He released her, hating himself, and strode out of the room.

"I don't think she would have wanted you to kill for her," she said as he left.

He closed his eyes briefly, then continued on his way.

"Thank you, Father."

Thor turned and left the throne room, and Loki slowly let the illusion fade away.

"No. Thank you." He smiled, relishing the feeling of the throne under him and Gungnir in his hand. He stayed for a minute or two longer there, until he remembered her, still sitting in the library, and he reluctantly placed Gungnir back where Odin had hid it, and left.

He had to find out how to get her memory back. And where better to go than to where she was?

But first, he had to make arrangements to protect her while he was not there.

It was midnight, and Loki knelt in the main part of Frigga's private chambers. Alana was sleeping in the next room.

The molten gold, floating in the air, shone faintly, soft and waiting for him. He let his Jotunn blue creep up his hand, then pressed his thumb into the gold.

There was no pain, only a faint warmth, but he wished that it hurt, so he could hurt for her.

He removed his thumb and the metal was cool, solid, and hard. It dropped from the air and into his waiting palm. The whorls of his fingerprint were imbedded in the charm. He threaded a golden chain through a small hole he had made, then began to use his magic.

He cast protection spells, danger spells, warning spells. He worked until the sun began to rise and the light shone through the windows. It would be perfect, it would protect her, she would know when he was near, when she was safe.

If he could not protect her… no. He wouldn't think of that. He would not endanger her again; she would be safe with him.

He was sure of it.

Alana woke up and didn't know where she was for a moment. But when she realized what she was wearing, she immediately sat up.

So it had not been a dream. She was really in a palace. An alien palace, no less. And Lucas… had he left again?

She didn't know what to think about him, his silence, his intensity. He scared her, in a way, and he made her head hurt constantly, a faint but persistent ache. But his anguish had seemed genuine, over his lost love... the one he had killed for.

She could read it in his face; he was broken. He's a murderer, her mind told her persistently. You can read it in his eyes. But he needed someone, that was obvious, but who was she to presume that she could help him in any way? He was an alien, she was just a girl out of place.

I suppose I'm the alien to him, she thought absentmindedly. But he was the only person she had here, and she had decided to trust him.

A memory came to her, Coulson shaking his head during her training, whispering to another agent, "She's too trusting. Surprising, actually, considering what she's been through."

What had she been through?

And maybe she was too trusting, but so what? She was fine, for the moment. And she still had a strange feeling about Lucas…

She rolled out of the bed and walked over to a small window set in the stone walls and gasped in surprise and awe.

The full splendor of a golden city loomed before her, a bridge made of glass and light heading out to a point in the sea. The sun was rising steadily, and the sky was streaked with color.

There was a knock on the door, and Lucas cautiously stuck his head inside.

"It's beautiful," she breathed. She could hear his low chuckle behind her. "I suppose it does take some getting used to," he admitted.

She stood transfixed for another minute, then snapped out of her reverie and turned to him.

"I have something for you," he said, sitting down on the floor and gesturing for her to do the same.

She sat cross-legged on the floor in front of him. "Hold out your hands," he said softly. She cupped her hands in front of her, and he poured a necklace into them, the golden chain glimmering faintly in the light.

"It's cold!" she exclaimed, "Really cold!" She examined the charm more closely. "Is this… a fingerprint?"

"Yes," he replied, "mine. Now, pay attention. This will protect you, so wear it at all times."

She fastened the chain around her neck, still studying the charm. He continued, "The necklace is cold. Cold means safe. If it ever grows warm, it means that you're in danger. If I'm with you, it probably won't grow warm, but if it does, tell me. If I'm not there, hide."

"Cold means safe. Warm means danger. Got it."

"No, Alana." He grabbed her wrist before she could stand up. "You have to hide. Promise me. If Odin finds me, you have to stay safe."

"I'll be fine. I did work for S.H.I.E.L.D., you know. Just 'cause I have amnesia doesn't mean I can't fight."

"Not this. You can't fight this. Please."

She looked at him, startled. "All right, all right. I promise."

He was suddenly, instantly aware of the warmth of her skin, of her pulse flickering under her skin, the life running through her veins. So warm, so full of… everything, life and hope and pain and all the things that made her human.

All the things that made her who he loved.

She was looking at him a little oddly, seeing as his hand was still on her wrist, so he released her.

He needed her so badly it was like a physical need, pulling him towards her. Just to hold her, to stroke her hair, to gaze into her eyes… why had he not realized how wealthy he was before? When he had her, the world was a dream.

And he had not known their futures.

But he would save her memory. He would. He swore it to himself.

Today, he thought, will be the day I save her.

A/N: Happy New Year! And let me say that I am so grateful to all of you who are crazy enough to stay with me and my crazy story... to all you who have reviewed and favorited and followed. This story was just written for me in the first place, I never intended to put in on here, but I'm so glad that I did, if only to give you some feels. ('Cause there weren't enough canon Loki feels already...) But really, you guys are the best. Srsly. ;)