Chapter 37

Blow of Mercy

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No more time was wasted by the group to engage in what would be, perhaps, the only chance they would have to rescue Kallian and Alistair from the Chantry. If not for the solid structure made of stone and iron, and its good foundation, at this point the building would have already collapsed. Not that it was far from happening - with every passing minute, more pieces of the ceiling fell, to the dismay of all. The place where the kitchen once existed, was reduced to a pile of flaming wreckage around the large granite statue of the prophet Andraste. The Chantry's bottom no longer existed, and soon all the adjacent rooms would succumb too, starting with living quarters.

It was only a matter of time before the chaos would reach the balcony of the library, and the proof of that fact was the tremors the two Wardens felt every time the flames crackled higher, eroding slowly and cruelly the pillars that kept their spot safe.

Convincing Lenna Hawke to cooperate was not as difficult as Noah imagined, quite the contrary. Carver was quite emphatic in highlighting how her help was important to the group, and how they would finally leave this place cursed by the Maker soon after that, so any further discussion was avoided. The mage showed up willing to help, but making it clear - well, between the lines actually - that she wasn't able to raise a wall of the size they needed alone, at least not with so little mana running through her veins. Yet, as the desire to get out of that damned city was mutual - thank the Maker for that - teamwork was not denied: Morrigan was also willing to help wild Hawke complete her primal magic with the witch's ice spells.

Cards on the table, the exhausted group moved to the side of the Chantry, following Carver's directions.

"You sure?" Leliana asked, still a little suspicious. She followed Noah closely, but deep down, she wasn't convinced. Her knowledge about the Grey Wardens was limited, she admited it, but even so it seemed somewhat surreal, even for someone like her, who fircely believed and followed her instincts with no doubt.

When Noah didn't reply - Not meaning to be rude, but by being sunk up to his neck in his own anxiety and worry - Mahariel took the lead in the discussion, "He may be right. There is something different there."

"Can you tell us more?" The sister asked, now driven by her curiosity instead of worrying.

"I could," Mahariel answered truthfully. "But tell me, would you be able to explain in short and precise words your own faith, for instance?"

Leliana opened her mouth to reply, but closed it soon after. She could explain how the figure of Andraste had touched her in a moment where she'd had nothing, and how the kindness of the Maker had kept her sane all these years, but not in a way that didn't resort to metaphors, philosophy and an exhausting discussion of point of views that would require time and energy, two things which they had not. Then, she finally realized where the Dalish was going - in both cases, the only thing left for them was to have faith and move on.

"I see." Was the sister's only reply, slightly puzzled by the behavior of the Dalish. By staying ever so silent, her personality and beliefs was a mystery even to those who'd known her longer. For Leliana, however, they all were mysterious, since she didn't have the chance to exchange more than a few words with them. But even so, Mahariel was the one who had instigated her heightened curiosity.

The Dalish held her gaze for a while, just trying to decipher what might be going on inside the human's head at that moment that would explain her sudden interest. Something told her that it would mean another intense session of chattering later, so she couldn't help but to sigh heavily before returning her attention to the path ahead.

Humans were so confused.

No one else dared to question Noah's orders. Even those who'd complained at first, had remained quiet. It wasn't necessary to be a genius to understand that these Wardens might not be as crazy as they thought. After all, the objectives were gradually being fulfilled before their very eyes, and if they'd gotten this far under their leadership, it was because maybe they really knew what they were doing.

- x -

"I think the miracle you expect just happened ..." Alistair said, seeing the group approaching. After the third tremor, he had already lost hope of getting out of there alive, and every minute spent was like a confirmation of their inevitable fate.

Kallian, who was leaning against the eaves, way too distracted by the flames, didn't notice the approach of the Wardens until Alistair announced the fact out loud. In fact, she was quite surprised that they had came back for them both. It wasn't as if they were the favorites of the group, so the gesture made a smile cross her lips.

"I've told you," she teased, making no attempt to hide her satisfaction. Not even the muffled roar of hate from the Lion was able to shake the flames of hope that began to burn in her chest.

That they had returned ... The feeling was wonderful.

While Alistair waved to the group, she went back to the library and picked up the chair that the Templar had used to break the window. With all those injuries, she doubted he'd be able to jump over the short wall on his own.

To their surprise, upon arriving at the edge, she saw a wall of earth and ice rising to the balcony, making a raw path for them to slide to the ground. It didn't take long until the two Wardens were finally slipping to freedom. However, what was supposed to be the end of all conflicts, only proved to be just the beginning of a storm that would affect everyone.

Alistair, without much control over his own body, rolled carelessly over the ice unti finally stopping at the feet of Leliana, who kindly bolstered the poor Templar, whose ribs were screaming with pain. The healing mantle of Bethany was soon over him, but it was no more than a fading shadow of its true power. It was enough to get him up again, but not enough to heal his wounds. Like everyone there, he would have to fight against his own body to stay alive.

Kallian, despite fighting her own wounds and burns, wasn't as bad as she seemed to be. All the tension built by the recent meeting with the Lion - even if it was just the glimpse of his wicked shadow - aroused her most primitive instincts of survival, and getting away of that place was basically all that mattered - moving away from the Chantry it was a great relief, almost touchable - not only because of the flames, but mostly because as soon as she got away from there, she would be far from the demon.

At least, this logic made sense to her turbulent mind.

After touching the cool grass and the firm ground, her blood began to boil again, but for another reason. All it took was a single exchange of glances between Lenna and Kallian for the chaos settle down completely.

Kallian's cursed mark, given to her by the demonic Lion, tingled intensely on her right shoulder, reacting promptly to the mana running in the veins of the firstborn of the Hawkes.

The look of the mage was no less intense. Every aspect of her aloof figure exuded disgust, hatred, and even a small glint of fear cloaked behind her stormed expression.

It took only a glance to make Kallian stand and raise her solitary dagger above her head, defending herself from a deadly blow from Lenna.

"Mage..." Kallian growled through gritted teeth, overwhelmed with fury . The others' questions were no more than muffled whispers in the face of the anger she was feeling.

Again, a bloody apostate had crossed Kallian's path, and like all others, had also tried to use her wicked powers against her. It could be weak, but Kallian could feel the electric charge leaving the fingers of the mage, crossing both metal pieces until finally it tingle on the tip of the little elf's fingertips.

"The order is recruiting elves now?" Lenna asked, her tone a mix of panic and apprehension. "The Templars must be very desperate."

Behind her, Bethany had also been apprehensive from her sister's comment. Carver, on the other hand, was torn between the two women. He knew Kallian was a Grey Warden, and it was very likely that she had no relationship with the Templars, but still couldn't keep calm about it. He was awfully aware of what her sister was capable of, and that she didn't measure the consequences when it came to the hunters of the Chantry. He also feared for Lenna, since any wrong move could mean the end of them. After all, if Kallian died, her group wouldn't think twice about revenge, and the Hawkes were clearly outnumbered.

Kallian just plunged her dagger forward into the air, forcing the mage to take a step back. Her eyes never left the mage's, and through clenched teeth the elf growled, "Drop your sword."

"No way, Chantry whore," Lenna snapped. Behind her, Leandra Hawke sobbed nervously, holding Bethany's arm as if she afraid that someone would steal her little daughter out of her arms. "I'll cut your throat before you can lay a finger on my family!" She grunted, repeating the gesture. The electric charge intensified slightly, inflicting some disconfort before extinguishing completely all at once.

Perplexed, Lenna let her guard down long enough for Kallian to press her further, forcing her to take a leap back and break the physical contact.

"I am the Templar," the hoarse, demanding voice of Alistair interrupted her thoughts. Even weak, he was standing with one hand raised against the enraged mage, a serious expression on his face. Any channeling attempt was immediately dispelled, so she finally understood that he was actually canceling her spells. "Get away from her."

"You cannot fool me," Her sword was still firm, pointed at the little elf. "You smell like Lyrium, elf…."

"You heard the man," the deep voice of the Templar senior echoed, silencing everyone. A bright blue light was coming out of his hand, crossing the air in front of him and going towards the mage. "I'd chosen to close my eyes regarding your presence, apostate, but only because of the extreme situation in which we find ourselves." He took a step forward. "I even was willing to ignore your existence, due to the effort and dedication of the innocent folks of this town, but I won't tolerate this!"

She could feel her mana being drained away as the energy flow became brighter.

"If you're a threat, I will put aside my goodwill and will enforce the will of the Maker." He concluded, undoing the effect on her. "I won't warn you twice."

"Damn," she complained, approaching her sister. She remembered a wildcat protecting her kittens uncertain about whom she should point her sword at.

"For the last time," Noah growled, grabbing Kallian by the back of the collar of her blouse and pulling her back, placing himself between the two. Even angry, he still remembered the last time he'd grabbed the elf's arm, and this time he wanted to avoid another slap in the face. "Nobody gives a shit about you." The elf tried to return to her initial position, but Noah had decided to keep her in place. This time, he was really using his strength. In fact, he couldn't understand why the hell she'd lost her mind so suddenly, when it was more likely that he would be the first one to explode. "So, for the love of the Maker, stop thinking that you are the center of the universe and go kill the danmed Darkspawn!"

Mahariel tried to react, to defend Kallian, but Alistair put his arm in front of her, gently lowering her bow before she could take aim. When she looked at him with her old hatred of humans, he just nodded serenely, sure of himself. Watching Noah using brutality against the small elf evoked the most aggressive side of his protective instincts, but he knew that look - he had seen it once, in the Wilds, and knew that she was planning something.

Even behind his indignation, Alistair was sure that Kallian knew what she was doing, and it was this unwavering conviction that kept Mahariel from interfering.

The mage had opened her mouth to reply, but this time Carver prevented it. "Enough, Lenna!" His imperative tone was so atypical, so determined, that Lenna swallowed her words. He spoke exactly like their decesead father, and if that fact alone was not enough, the memories made her keep quiet. "Maker have mercy, let's just do exactly as they say and get out of this place ..."

The mage looked at Kallian furiously, and then at each member of her family, thoughtfully. She was so tired of all of it - tired of Darkspawn, the Wardens, the Blight, Templars in Lothering, so many deaths ... She just wanted a little peace in some quiet place where she didn't have to run all the time and could sleep with both eyes closed for a change. A place where, at least for a day, she wouldn't have to fight.

She let out a long, deep sigh. It was too much to ask?

She did ask herself that question more than one million times. And the answer seemed to be always the same.

"If our father were here ..." She began.

"You are not him!" Carver snapped irritably. If before, by the good will of the Maker, Noah hadn't given her a well-deserved slap, now the words of the young man did the dirty work - his statement slapped her face as if it was a whip of sthorns. "You are not him," he repeated slowly, pointing a finger at her face. "Stop acting like this, or you will end up killing us all."

"Whatever, Carver, whatever." She huffed, turning her sword into the air and holding it above her shoulders with the blade pointed down, the other hand in the air in a gesture of surrender. Her expression was one of fury, but behind her bright ocean eyes was a twinge of pain so strong that she had to close her eyes and nod, to disguise the tears threatening to ruin the brave image she was trying to keep. More than annoyed, far more than betrayed, she felt helpless, unable to accomplish the only purpose of her life, and at the same time, guilty for having failed so miserably.

However, she didn't let any of her whirlwind of emotions reach her face, and to complete her peaceful gesture, she added bitterly, "Do as you wish, brother. But know that if it goes wrong, I will make sure to keep you alive for long enough to suffer the guilt. "

"As you wish, sister." Carver held her gaze, just to make sure she wouldn't change her mind. "Lead the way, Wardens." he said after a while in silence, glancing apologetically to Kallian. He knew he wasn't the one to blame for the behavior of his rebel sister, but still couldn't help but feel that he should try to redeem himself anyway. However, he began to feel really sick when noticed the expression of the little elf. At first she just shrugged, as if it was everyting all right and that she didn't care about Lenna's rudeness, but when she turned her eyes to the firstborn of the Hawkes, he saw the living flame of hatred and contempt reflected clearly through her yellow eyes.

At the same time Carver had felt guilty, more than that, he felt scared. He actually feared for the safety of his sister. The look in Kallian's eyes was dangerously predatory, and he found himself silently praying to the Maker that the Warden who held her to have a grip as strong as it seemed to be.

"Right," replied Kallian, finally getting out of her trance of anger and turning to Noah with a tone a little more imperative than her usual . "Can you let me go now?"

Her tone was harsh, and everything in her posture betrayed a strange glimpse of disarray that did not go unnoticed by Noah, who kept his fist tightly closed in her collar.

"No." He barked, stepping away from Hawke and dragging Kallian along with him. "We need to talk."

"Now?" She tried to pull him back, but Noah was determined to drag her along with him, keeping a few steps ahead of the rest of the group. "You've got to be kidding ..."

Seeing that they were not only talking, but also heading out of Lothering, Alistair motioned for Leliana to help him to guide the survivors the same way. They were, in general, too scared, too shocked to do anything but follow instructions and let themselves be guided like sheep by a shepherd in the field. There was no room for panic, much less for hope - there was only that paralyzing feeling of numbness that affected every little fiber of their bodies, every cell of their brains, blocking any kind of thought or reaction.

There was only fear, and nothing else.

"No, actually I'm serious," Noah growled. "Quite serious, indeed." He stopped suddenly, pulling her closer, forcing her to look at him. "This is the last time I will accept this kind of madness from you. You have consistently dragged me into one mess after another, elf, and next time, you'll be on your own."

"I told you to leave," she said between her gritted teeth, imitating his low voice.

"And you think that's how it works? You do whatever shit you want and think you're okay, just because you were by yourself?" He gave her a jolt. "Like it or not, you're in a group now. Your actions have consequences, elf. You cannot just stick a knife in your heart and think that no one else will be involved."

"It worked, and that's what matters." She tried again to take his hand from her clothes, but was unsuccessful. "For the last time, Noah, let me go."

"Not until we're done." He kept walking away from the group. It was the best he could do to keep up the subject between them, far from the ears of the group. He had nothing against the refugees, in fact part of him was satisfied with such a great number, but even so, it was craziness, and he wanted to make her understand that this kind of luck wouldn't happen twice in life. Kallian, on the other hand, was already feeling the blood boiling in her veins. And, given the circumstances, her patience had depleted long, long ago. "We have a mission, you just can't keep- ARGH! Oh, you little son of a bitch!"

Giving a new meaning to the word irritated, Kallian turned, in a precise movement, grabbing his arm and biting it soon after, hard enough to make him retreat. The aura of anger that hung between them was visible even to those who followed on the far side of the group, whose surprised expressions were hard to hide.

Noah turned away, holding the part of his arm marked by the teeth of the elf.

"You want to talk? Okay, let's talk." She took a step forward, ignoring his fists clenched dangerously beside his body. Maker, how angry she was... "Drop it." She paused. "You want to throw everything at me, fine, but don't pretend you don't have a share of blame in all this." She took a deep breath before continuing. "You stayed. Again, there was no rope pulling you by the neck, so stop pretending that your decisions are not yours."

"We have a mission." He repeated, fighting the urge to punch her, and truth be told, he was about to fail in his efforts. He'd never wanted to put her in her place as much as in that moment, and show, once and for, all that he was capable of and what the consequences of forcing his limits.

If asked, he would say that the Maker himself was holding his hand.

"I am a person, before I am a Warden." she took deep breaths, giving enough time for the message to echo through his ears to be sure that he had absorbed every single word, and that the message was properly understood. "Nothing you can say will change that."

"Perhaps," Noah said, his nails drawing blood from his palms. "But if we die, it's over." He shifted his feet and nodded toward the rest of the group.

They stared at each other for a long time, enough for the group to catch up and the prying eyes started to become bothersome. Kallian considered his words carefully, but even partially agreeing with him, his argument was not worth the peace of mind of her consciousness. Her nights were already way too disturbed for her to add more regret to the formula.

"We just have to stay alive, then." She finally answered him, as if it was obvious.

"Stay alive…" He repetead with sarcasm, more growling to himself than replying to her aloud. After deeps breaths, more than necessary, Noah turned his back on everyone and started walking, watching from afar the mobilization of Darkspawn near the inn. It was a large group, visibly agitated and slowly but fiercely marching toward them.

Glancing one last time over his shoulder, he looked around the group: Leliana, Alistair and Mahariel were covered in burns, and the templar had the worst of wounds of all. It was as if he and Morrigan were competing to see which of the two was paler. Shaw-Shaw in turn, was covered in blood, but luckily, it was not his. Of all of them, he was the least hurt.

The Hawkes weren't injured, but they compensated for the fact in exhaustion. The eldest daughter, Lenna, was keeping a pace far greater than she was able to sustain, and reached the point of not having enough strength to speak. Even the Qunari, who competed with the dog in the accumulated blood category, already felt an uncomfortable numbness in his limbs.

Concluding then that it wasn't the best time to continue the discussion, he decided to end the conversation by telling her one of the hardest truths that he'd faced in his military career. "You may have been happy with what you did today, but don't let it deceive you, "he growled, accelerating his pace. "You can't win a war without the sacrifice of a few small victories."

Kallian snorted.

She hadn't realized the Darkspawn approaching, so involved she arguing with Noah. His hasty steps unwittingly encouraged the others to run too, which opened the distance between them and the enemy considerably.

"You are very hypocritical, and it pisses me off," she muttered behind him, louder than the sound of the various metal boots stomping the sandy ground behind her. "You do the opposite of what you preach, and then come up with these speeches like a cold-hearted bastard, only as an excuse to throw your frustrations on others - Hey!"

She, in her frustrated and wide strides, not realized Noah had suddenly stopped in front of her and she ended up running into him, her forehead hitting the back of his chestplate.

Even more angry, Kallian went around the human to his front, the question written all over her face, but when she saw the color disappearing from his face, and his light brown eyes widening with shock, her anger disappeared.

Her instincts clicked, and soon every fiber of her body was in an alerted state, ready to react to the iminent danger. Her head soon traveled to the Fade, and all the darkest outcomes possible that the situation could take, but when she turned her head to follow Noah's gaze, the ground was stolen right beneath her feet, and perhaps for the first time, she wished it was the Lion that was really standing in front of her as she first had thought, instead of that.

There was a moment of shocked silence, when the only noise was the creaking of the ropes against the wood from which the bodies hung...

A/N: This chapter ended up being too big. I had to split it. D:

What's going on between Kallian and Lenna? If I had to guess, I would say that the little elf is willing to put that slap into use…

Just a reminder…. Since I've come back from that long hiatus, I've become a bit lazy about the credits. But nothing has changed - this story was brought to you by the excellent beta work of Rohh Lael and wintryone ;)