"It takes ten times longer to put yourself back together as it does to fall apart." - Suzanne Collins

The door to Maxon's room creaked as I snuck inside, tiptoeing carefully to the bed and snuggling under the covers. I laced my hands around his chest and stuck my feet between his legs to warm them up. With my cheek pressed between his shoulder blades I could hear his heart pounding, healthy and strong. He instinctively reached for my hands and clasped them in his own, settling down again quickly.

Since August's death a few days prior, Marlee and I had been spending the nights with Georgia in her room at the palace. She was so distraught and we knew that there was no way she would sleep if she was by herself. Maxon didn't like that I was doing this since it meant that I was still not getting a lot of sleep but she needed me and I couldn't leave all of the caretaking to Marlee. I wasn't the only one with young kids to take care of.

Maxon eventually rolled over and I was shocked to see his eyes open. "Hello," he whispered, placing a gentle kiss on the tip of my nose. "How's Win?"

"Sound asleep," I answered, running one of my hands lazily up his side to his face where I brushed some hair away. I would need to give him another hair cut soon. "I thought you were sleeping as well."

"Not without you here," he told me honestly. "I just can't rattle this melancholia Ames. I don't ever want to take you for granted…"

I shook my head. "When have you ever taken me for granted?"

"More than you think. With everything that's happened this past week I've realized just how little I do appreciate the life we've been given. Not just that we're happily married with kids but that we get to see each other every day. If we were Fives like you said, we wouldn't be like that. I feel like I'm not thankful enough for this life I've been given. I mean, I was born into this. I don't deserve it, any of it." He shrugged again and I gently pushed him so he was on his back and rested my hands on his chest.

"Maxon Schreave, you are the kindest, most generous person I know. You are the best king to ever rule Illéa. You may feel that you don't deserve this but you are the only one who could have ever lived this life," I told him, drawing circles lazily across his warm skin.

His eyes grew soft and he ran a hand down the side of my face. I leaned into it automatically. "What would I do without you?" he whispered, sitting up a bit to kiss me. "You're my whole world and it terrifies me. What if something does happen? We've had so many close calls…"

"It comes with the territory," I reminded him. "We'll never be completely safe. But Maxon, if anything does ever happen to me, you need to stay strong. We have the kids now to think about. Even if I'm gone, you'll still have them." I frowned, getting sad again. "Can we please not talk about this? I just got you back." He smiled sadly and folded me into his arms again, kissing my hair until I fell back asleep.

The sun poured through the windows of our car as we rode to the cemetery. It felt wrong for the day to be so bright and welcoming when we all were grieving and in various stages of melancholia. Even Shalom and Amber knew to be quiet and reserved as they sat in their seats across from Maxon and I in the car. I wanted to leave Win at the palace but she just wasn't old enough to be left with a nanny yet.

Maxon's hand reached out to rest on my knee when our car rolled to a stop. The entire cemetery was surrounded by guards and special forces and police officers. No one was taking any chances on the king and queen today. Not with the most recent events.

Ahead of us, Georgia got out of the car with August's parents and younger brother. Their contact with our family had been minimal and Maxon claimed that they were not as eager with reuniting the Schreave-Illea alliance as August was. Now we both wondered if they would change their mind since they've seen how close we were to him and Georgia.

No one talked as we walked to the plot of land Georgia had been required to pick out. It was large and close to the mausoleum that housed the closest relatives to the royal family. This cemetery was primarily for Ones and Twos anyway. Maxon held Shalom's hands, Amber walking on her own in front of us while I held Win close to me. It was hot and humid and not at all comfortable weather to be outside in, not even a whisper of a breeze in the air.

We stood respectively on the other side of the casket from Georgia and August's family as she and August's brother said their last words. Halfway through, sensing that I needed the comfort, put his arm around my shoulders. I couldn't help but think back to that first night when I met August and Georgia. I was awed at how easily they communicated without even speaking, wondering if I would ever have that with Maxon. Now it felt like our communication went so beyond that and come to think of it, we wouldn't have had that chance without August. If he hadn't had the Northern Rebels in the palace that day of the attack, Maxon surely would have died. It seemed I had a lot in my life to thank August for.

I shut my eyes as the casket was slowly lowered into the ground, leaning completely against Maxon because I wasn't sure anymore if I could stand on my own two feet. I could hear Georgia's hysterical crying from across the way and the sniffles of all of our closest friends surrounding me. I begged Win to have a tantrum so I would have the excuse to leave and not be part of this anymore.

Finally we the service ended and we were able to go back to the palace where I had a small luncheon organized for everyone that had been at the cemetery. Maxon excused himself because he really did have a lot of work to catch up on and I had to feed Win to avoid throwing off her feeding schedule.

Aspen caught up to me as we walked up to our respective suites. "I just keep thinking about how August was the only one to keep faith in Maxon all through the trial," he said matter-of-factly.

"Don't feel guilty about anything, Aspen," I told him, holding tight to the squirming baby in my arms.

He shook his head. "It's not that. I do feel bad for being more loyal to Maxon but it's just August's whole outlook on life. He was just so intuitive and had incredible instincts. I've been going through all of his stuff lately to learn all I can about his work. He was just an all-around great guy," he remarked.

I nodded, well aware that August was a good person. "I'm just scared for Georgia. She has the same heart of gold and I don't want that to be compromised by all of this."

"We'll look after her. She has a support system in all of us." We stopped at the second floor landing and he hugged me, patting a hand on Win's small head. "And you know that if you and Maxon need anything, even if it's just another babysitter, you can call on Lucy and me."

"We do, Aspen. Thank you," I said, smiling sadly at him.

Those first few days following August's funeral seemed to stretch on. My attention was stretched between my duties as queen and mother and also caring for Georgia. She was staying in the palace because we just didn't want her to be in her house alone. There were too many ghosts there for her.

Before we knew it, five months had passed by and life around the palace had settled into a bit of normalcy. The twins, now three-years-old, had finally become more independent and Win had grown into a thriving infant. May divided the time between the palace and caring for Kenna who was now pregnant with her second child, her own son constantly in tow. Aspen said that for the time being he and Lucy were content with Abigail as their only child and would maybe revaluate in a few years.

Maxon and I were still moving forward with our plans of abolishing the castes and the pockets of resistance were essentially smothered after the last attack during Maxon's trial. He liked to joke that maybe the Southern Rebels had finally learned their lesson but we both agreed that there was no way we had heard the last from them. They were rebuilding now and we would stop them before they could return and do anything with lasting consequences. It turned out that my special forces attacks had destroyed most of their clans and they were, for the most part, demolished as a group.

One morning a couple weeks after the twins' birthday celebration I walked into our study to find Maxon not working at all but playing with Win on the floor. "Hey mister, don't you have work to do?" I asked, putting my hands on my hips.

Win laughed and pointed at me, babbling out a string of baby talk. "Is that Mama?" Maxon asked her. "Yes, wave to Mommy." He took one of her little hands in his and moved it so she was waving at me.

I just rolled my eyes playfully at him and walked over to my desk. "Did you finish that report for James?" I asked, looking over the notes that had been left on my desk over the course of that morning.

"Yep. It's over on my desk. Sorry, this little one distracted me," he apologized, making silly faces at our baby girl. "Didn't you, little girl?"

I smiled and walked to his desk, taking in his discarded jacket, tie and shoes. "The shoes I understand you wearing every day with the amount of Legos that are lying around our rooms but the tie and jacket? Honestly, why do you insist on wearing them just to take them off halfway through the day?"

He shrugged. "Because I wanted the advisers to see an immaculate king in front of them through these rocky months we've been having. Even if that king does have to skip shaving for a couple days because the twins insist on eating early breakfasts with him."

"At least your beard is light so you can get away with not shaving everyday. That's not something Shalom will have," I reminded him.

"Ugh, let's put off the discussions centering around Shalom shaving, okay? I'm not ready for him to be all grown up yet." I smiled and took the folder from his desk to mine, sitting down in my comfy leather chair. "I just want them all to be babies forever. Ames, when can we have another one?"

I laughed, raising my eyebrows at him. "You really want another one?" I asked.

"Don't tell me you're pregnant…"

That just made me laugh even louder. "Lord, thank goodness, no. Give me another year or so and we can revisit this discussion, okay? I want the twins fully capable of caring for themselves before we have another baby. Which, if you keep spoiling them so, will be twenty years from now."

"Hey, rewards do not count as spoiling them. Something needs to get them through potty training," he argued.

I gave him a look to say I wasn't buying it. "Except for when you give them chocolate even when they do have accidents," I retorted. Since starting their potty training, the amount of chocolate they'd been receiving from Maxon had gone through the roof. "At least Amber is pretty much done. Shalom, on the other hand…"

"I'm still in support of your mother's idea for just letting him run around naked all day. Sounds like it would really work," Maxon said, this being the twentieth time he had suggested that in the last week.

"Yes and it would also be wildly inappropriate. It worked in our little house in Carolina but it will not be received nearly as well here, in a palace, as an heir to the throne. Heaven forbid we have guests and he runs into a meeting!" I tried to sound horrified at the thought but the image was really too comical for me to keep a straight face. Especially coupled with Maxon's laughter.

He shook his head and started ticking Win. "Your mother is such a worrier," he said to youngest daughter. He lifted her to his shoulder and walked to his desk just as Aspen led Delilah into our study.

"Your Majesties," she bowed, looking between our desks like she didn't know who to speak to of the two of us.

I looked at Maxon pointedly to tell him to take this one so I could finish reading the report and sign off on it. I still listened in though. "What is it you need, Delilah?" Maxon asked, settling Win comfortably in his lap.

Aspen sat down on one of the couches with a book propped on one of his knees, rubbing his forehead in concentration as he read. Delilah cleared her throat. "We've lost another cook, Your Majesty," she reported grimly. At this I raised my eyes to look at her as Aspen did the same, all of us shocked at the news. With such a large staff this happened frequently, at least once every one to two months. It never made it easier to hear though. "Two, actually. Desmond Pare and his wife, Kailyn. It was a car accident."

Maxon nodded, taking this in. "Thank you for informing us, Delilah. You have our permission to start the hiring process for two more cooks at your earliest convenience."

"There's something else, Your Majesty," she said quickly. "They have a young daughter. Neither of them have brothers and sisters and Desmond's parents are the only ones who are alive but are both in a nursing home. They're unable to care for the girl. She's basically an orphan."

I put my pen down and looked over at Maxon, not even knowing what his next move would be. "She has absolutely no one else? Not even close family friends?"

"She's in my care for now but I can't support her. I have my own children and grandchildren," she explained. "In the long term, I can't hold on to her."

"What is the girl's name?" I asked Delilah.

Delilah looked at me. "Shel, my queen. Her name is Shel. She's four-years-old and barely understands what has happened to her parents. She just knows that something tragic has happened. She's cute as a button and the sweetest little thing you'll ever meet."

Maxon was clearly reading my expression and jumped in. "We're not adopting her, America. Do you not remember the conversation we just had?"

I shook my head at him and waved a hand to tell him to stop talking. "No, we're not adopting her. But I know someone who could." I looked at Aspen who held his hands up.

"Hey, I told you, Abigail is enough for Lucy and I." He cleared his throat and looked at Delilah sheepishly. "Not that adopting her would be a huge burden, it wouldn't…" he started backtracking.

"No, both of you stop your belligerent babbling. I'm talking about Georgia." Aspen's mouth fell open as Maxon looked at me as if I had lost my mind. After a few seconds of thought, my husband's expression evened out and fixed his gaze at something on his desk as I explained, "We all know how desperately she wants a child and with August gone…" I stopped, August's death still being a difficult topic amongst our group.

Maxon shrugged. "It could work," he stated simply as Aspen started nodding. "Someone would have to propose it to her carefully."

"Or not at all," I told him. "Georgia has a heart of gold. If she falls in love with this girl and then hears that she's an orphan, I can almost guarantee that she'll make the offer herself."

Delilah considered it and then nodded. "I trust Georgia to take care of the girl," she agreed.

I smiled at her. "Thank you for informing us of this, Delilah. Do you think you could make yourself available for a dinner with all of us tomorrow night?" I asked.

"Yes, ma'am, I most certainly can."

"Perfect. Then you're dismissed," I told her. She curtsied and left the room swiftly, leaving the three of us in silence. "Is this the right thing to do?" I suddenly asked, no longer so sure of myself.

Maxon shrugged but was soon distracted by Win's face scrunching up in a cry. "She needs to be fed," he told me, instantly reading her discontent as being hungry.

I held my arms open so he walked over to me and placed her in my arms as Aspen said, "I think this is right. You're right; Georgia does want a child. And she is the kindest person. She'll love this girl like her own."

I bounced Win from side to side to temporarily placate her. Her clumsy hands were reaching for the top of my dress hungrily. "Okay, then it's settled. I'll tell Marlee to get it all organized for tomorrow night."

"I'll leave you two to yourselves. I have some work to do in my office," Aspen told us but I knew he was really just giving me some peace to feed Win.

After he left, Maxon shook his head and chuckled as he got back to work. "Honestly, the man helps you give birth but can't stomach the sight of you feeding a baby. Good thing you didn't marry him."

The next night I was a bundle of nerves getting ready for dinner. Give me royal dignitaries, a dictator trying to conquer Illéa, or my husband being framed for murder any day and I would be fine. Something like this, though, and I was crumbling.

"Calm down. Your evil genius plans are always carried out flawlessly," Maxon told me as we rushed down to the Great Room for dinner. He was fastening his watch after having to rush out of our suite. The danger of having three kids meant never going anywhere on time. "Maybe you should have gone for that run this morning," he joked, recalling my mental debate from that morning of how to expel all of my pent up energy.

I sighed and ran a hand down the brown lace of my dress. "I need to run more often anyway. This dress just does not fit me the same way it used to." I adjusted the belt uncomfortably, dreading how it would cinch into my stomach and waist all night.

"Hey," Maxon said, pulling me to a stop. "Your body served as a vessel for three extraordinary children. You grew them spectacularly and you are even more beautiful now because of it."

I smiled at him sweetly. "You're cute, you know that?" I teased even though his words did in fact strike a cord. I couldn't soften up on him now after nearly five years of marriage.

"Yes, my dear, I do know that." I rolled my eyes, a reflex reaction every time I heard the endearment directed at me. One time a diplomat had the unfortunate experience of paying witness to said eye roll when he called me 'dearie.' Silvia chewed me out for it later as Maxon just laughed his head off about the whole interaction.

We walked into the Great Room where the entire party was already mingling around the table. We had invited Marlee, Carter, Aspen, Lucy, Georgia, May, Beckner, Delilah and her family, and August's brother Emilio. He had been spending a fair amount of time around the palace, shadowing Aspen and Carter and learning about his brother's old job so that he could hopefully take over one day. Maxon always said that the government could use more Illéas.

When we walked in everyone immediately bowed or curtsied and walked to their seats. With this being a more casual dinner I was able to sit next to Maxon. Across from me were Delilah and Shel. Shel was a beautiful child, with dark brown skin and frizzy black hair ballooning out of her head in an adorably comical fashion. She was quiet and reserved but spoke amicably to Georgia who just happened to be seated across from the girl.

We made it maybe halfway through dinner before Georgia asked the tough question, clearly recognizing that Shel was not Delilah's real daughter or granddaughter. "Where are your parents, Shel?"

Everyone at the table grew quiet. Lucy pretended to stay interested in the conversation she was having with Marlee but both women were staring at my end of the table. Shel answered quietly, "They're both gone. Miss Delilah said they are living in a very happy place where it's always sunny. Not like here where it's hot. Where they are it's green and sunny all the time! Like the painting in the hallway!" Shel described enthusiastically.

Georgia's eyes fell and her shoulders sagged. "Oh. I'm so sorry," she told her quietly.

"Don't be sorry, Miss Georgia! Miss Delilah said they're very happy there!" Shel paused. "Is he your boyfriend?" Shel asked, pointing to Emilio.

Georgia cracked her smile and looked at her brother-in-law and then back at Shel. "No, he's my husband's brother," she told Shel.

"Where's your husband?" the little girl asked. At that, everyone stopped talking completely as they waited to see how Georgia was going to react.

"Shel!" Delilah snapped, instantly looking up at Georgia. "I'm so sorry, don't feel obligated to answer that."

I watched my friend shrug and smile sadly. "He's with your parents. Our baby boy went to that sunny place a year or so ago and my husband went with him," Georgia told her quietly.

"So you're all alone?" Shel asked in a shy voice.

"I guess so," Georgia said sadly.

Shel considered that. "I'm alone too. But no one should ever be alone. Miss Georgia, do you want to be my best friend?"

I held my breath and looked over at Georgia who slowly smiled and nodded at Shel. A single tear slid down her cheek as she answered, "I'd love that."

I know it has been such a long time since my last update! I am so sorry! Last week was syllabus week and I can already tell that this semester is going to be long and hard. College has officially hit! But just stay with me. Updates may be a bit slower to come but I refuse to put this story up for adoption. However, with this busier schedule, I've reevaluated and I think the next couple chapters will be quick drabbles about more *********** (I'm not really spoiling this for y'all, feel free to assume what you want) and then i'm skipping ahead to Amber while she's a teenager. Shit's gonna get real for the Schreave family. anyway, lots of people to answer and it's late so let's get to it!

Disclaimer: i apologize to anyone's name i misspell. like i said, it's late and there's a lot of you to go through.

Sci-FiGenius: I wasn't sure Maxon was gonna make it either!...JK, i could NEVER kill Maxon. If you read my other two Selection Fanfics you would know that whenever i killed Maxon i just had to bring him back to life somehow. I killed Peeta in my Hunger Games fic and even though it was the last chapter it was still so hard to write.

Alyza: No southern rebel killing sprees, sorry! But America was back to her usual antics with getting Georgia to fall in love with this little girl!

Jess: hmm. i don't know. even though i liked exploring that side of Maxon and America's relationship, her stress and resulted starvation was a result of that relationship falling into a bad place. as much as we all love a good Maxerica fight, i think they learned from that one, making another big fallout like that unlikely in the future as well as an illness brought on from stress on America's part a nonissue. sure, they'll fight because that's what they're best at but i don't think America will ever have reason to go to those measures again. sorry!

Alyzeh: i'm guessing you're different from the Alyza above?...Oi. Ellie is confused. Anyway, the next part was revealed approximately ten minutes ago when you went on Fanfiction just to check if your favorite Fanfic author happened to update your favorite Fanfic and you saw that she had in fact updated! (I accidentally typed 'ten years ago' instead of 'ten minutes ago' and had to fix it. I need to go to bed.)

Totalbooknerd13: And I love you precious little reader!

Someone the World Forgot: hopefully you're happy with this plot! Georgia will definitely have happier days to come! :)

Raniya: I wish updates came faster as well. I know i'm not the fastest (definitely not as fast as i used to be) but it's better than others. there's one fic that i'm in love with but the author updates once a month! at best. it does get crazy annoying but i can't really complain because every chapter is about 10,000 words and just AMAZING. i do the best i can as a college student writing, editing and posting everything myself. be thankful i don't beta!

Booksaremylife: haha, no i could never kill Maxon or Aspen! Writing this has made me really like Aspen. after the One i still just couldn't like the kid but now i love his character. and i usually know i'm doing something right if i'm crying while i write it. over winter break i was sitting in the family room with my mom and i was writing and i guess i sighed really loudly because she was like, "What's wrong" and i was just like "I have to kill someone Mom and i really don't want to do it." i wasn't writing anything for this; it was for one of my novels.

Mac: aww, you're so nice! I always look forward to your reviews. like i say every chapter, you'll be the first of my readers to know when i publish a book! and it was hard figuring out what to do because i didn't want Maxon to have a trial and i knew someone had to die and i wanted someone to have an adopted child and this was the best fit i could think of! better than killing Maxon, America, Aspen, Marlee, Lucy, Carter, or anyone else!

lilythemermaid: just because i'm reading your review after hers, you'll be second after Mac for my book! i love all of my reviewers equally! especially you Lily because you've been with me for basically my entire life. (It's really only been a year or so but it feels like forever!) and yeah, i'm sorry to hear about the issue with your reviews posting. i love your reviews so i would definitely see them when you post them!

LeftByTheGalaxy: Oh, shoot, i just realized i forgot to put that in here. Adler did it. i know that's super anticlimactic because he's a lame character that you know basically nothing about but he was adopted into the southern rebel family after the attack that killed Maxon's family.

Jessica: and i love love love love you Jessica!

TwinkleTwinkleHaha: i literally laughed out loud when i typed your name just now. and I KNNNNNOOOOOOWWWWW.

Me: Yeah, that happens to me sometimes! It's been really bad lately with Hunger Games fanfics. i went to see Mockingjay back in November and before the movie started i was like, "Oh yeah, that didn't really happen in the book. that was an AO3 book." whoops. i regret nothing. (especially the smutty fics) ;)

Ann's Krazy Obsession: Umm, no. August is definitely dead. sorry!

winterprincess: never apologize for not reviewing consistently! i am an awful person for not reviewing enough on other people's fics! you are still doing better than me, no matter what. but now Georgia has Shel!

Weatherbug02: yeah, i do follow her! but i'll admit that most of the blogs i follow are hunger games fandom blogs.

ThisGirlActuallyReads: Georgia will be okay!

prnamber3909: OMG i totally know, right? like, i cannot even right now. i just can't. *that was in a super basic white girl voice in case you didn't get the idea*

THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH FOR ALL OF THE LOVE! I AM SENDING LOTS OF HUGS AND HERSHEY'S KISSES OVER CYBERSPACE TO YOU ALL BECAUSE YOU DESERVE IT ALL AND MORE!