I spoke with Bailey this morning and she gave me the green light to begin Arizona's therapy so I called David to be sure he would be available, he said to come by around 10. I'm excitedly nervous for Arizona to try this new design. I really hope it works as well for her as it has with my vets. I even had a couple of female vets in the trials just to be sure it worked as well with their muscle movements as it did with the men. They all loved it. They said at times they even forgot it was a prosthetic. I had texted Arizona and told her I would have her brought down to PT at 10. So here I sit and wait for her arrival. Finally the door opens and she is being wheeled in. She has the biggest smile on her face and I can't help but smile back. There was a time when she didn't want me near her during these therapy sessions now she seems happy to see me.
"Hi" I squeak out my nerves getting the best of me.
"Hi Callie, Hi David" Arizona says.
"Hi Arizona, how are you feeling? You ready for this today?" David asks her.
"More than ready, I can't wait to be wheeling around here again." She says giving me a wink.
"Easy there tiger, let's get you up and walking again first ok, then we will see about everything else." David tells her.
"Always the party pooper" she says laughing.
"No party pooper here, just want to take things one step at a time. I've worked with you long enough now to know I will be dodging you in the halls in no time." He says joking with her.
"Ok you two, how about we just start with putting it on first. I want you to get used to the weight and be sure you are ok with it." I tell her.
"Ok let's do this" she says excitedly.
David helps her put it on and adjusts it. Then he steps back.
"So how does it feel" I ask.
"Wow" she says just staring at the leg then back to her right one. " you really can't see the difference can you, it's amazing."
"Well that was the idea, I know how awkward it can be with people staring and this way you can be on the beach or wear shorts whenever you want and the average person will never bat an eye, but the functionality of it is what really matters so how does it feel." I ask her.
"It feels good, the weight seems just like my right. I know I keep saying this but this really is amazing Callie, you should be so proud of yourself."
"That's what I keep telling her, but miss modest here won't take the credit." David says.
"I told you both, it has been a joint effort with everyone involved. " I say blushing. "Anyway, let's get you up and see if it's still is so amazing."
"Ok, can you help me stand" she asks me instead of David, so he steps back.
"Of course" I say as I come over and take her by the hands to help her up." Take it easy ok, just go slow, you still have your stitches in and I don't need Bailey trying to kill me because you busted one opened. Let's get you over to the bars."
"Don't worry about Bailey, I can take her if I have to." She says with another wink.
Is she flirting with me, or is she just excited. I'm sure it's just excitement there is no way she is openly flirting with me. My imagination is getting the best of me with everything Barbara has said. We get her to the bars and I let go of her hands. I feel the loss immediately. God I never realized how much I missed just the simplest things with her. Michelle and I held hands all the time but it never felt the way it does with Arizona. I knew it felt different I just never realized it felt different in a bad way until I just held Arizona's hands again.
"Callie, Callie" I hear.
"Huh...what"
"Where did you go" she asks me with concern in her eyes.
"No where, I am right here. I will always be right here." I say hoping she gets the double meaning as I am standing right beside her.
"Callie, please talk to me. What's wrong" she asks.
"Nothing really, I was just thinking how far we have come you know." I say. "There was a time when you wouldn't let me near your therapy sessions now ...well now not only do you want me here you want my help." I tell her with tears in my eyes.
She reaching up and cups my cheeks and gently wipes away the tear that escaped my eyes.
"I am so sorry Callie, so, so very sorry for all the pain I caused you." She says.
For the first time since everything has happened I can actually finally hear the sincerity in her voice. She has apologized before but it always just seemed so hollow. I'm not sure if that was because she didn't mean it or because I wasn't ready to forgive her so I didn't believe it, but right now in this moment, I believe her and I feel a weight lifted off me, I truly have forgiven her.