Thanks for reading and commenting. I appreciate you all. MissE if you ever decide to get a ff account be sure to message me. I would love to get into a conversation with you.

Please remember this fic is au and a true triangle so all three have a pov. It is way too soon to predict the ending and if you think this story isn't about Sam and Mercedes relationship too then you are missing something. Sam and Mercedes are at the core of this story. It is their marriage that is on the line.

Speaking of Samcedes...any fans of that pairing will probably enjoy the next several chapters.

Dr Hill is played by Candice Patton in my head.

Chapter 9

Mercedes was itching to move. She had only been confined to the hospital bed for one hour, and already she was bored out of her mind. There were so many other things she could've been doing, besides resting on her butt. Now Beth was being inconvenienced, her already hectic schedule, being disrupted once more, since she had to be shuttled to her grandfather's house.

"Are you sure you packed everything she needs?" asked Mercedes from the middle of her hospital bed, where she sat with her chin propped on her knees facing Beiste. She was hooked up to an IV so she couldn't go far.

Beiste pulled out the checklist that Mercedes had given to her earlier. "All the usual stuff we keep in her bag."

"And Starlight? Did you remember that?" she asked not recalling if she had actually included Beth's favorite toy on her very detailed list.

"Yes and I packed her castle snow globe." Beiste was getting irritated, her smile was getting tighter and tighter. Mercedes wasn't trying to be a pain, she just wanted to make sure Beth had everything she needed. She wasn't sure how long Julian would try to force her to stay in the hospital.

"Good. She doesn't sleep well if she doesn't hear the song before bed."

"I know. I gave specific instructions to play it for her."

"And just who is this woman Dwight hired? Is she qualified to take care of a baby?" asked Mercedes. She didn't like the idea of Dwight just bringing in some stranger to take care of Beth. She should have at least been consulted, so she could have checked the woman out first. Beth was her responsibility, and if anything happened to her under her watch, Sam would never forgive her.

"She has almost thirty years of experience, and excellent references. She was a nanny to royalty in Eastern Europe," replied Beiste. This was Beiste's third trip to the hospital of the day, this last trip was made especially for Mercedes, to bring her some pajamas and to fill her in on the arrangements for Beth.

"Eastern Europe?" Mercedes turned up her nose. "Does she even speak English?"

"English, French, German, Russian, Latvian, and she grew up in Nashville which is why Dwight hired her."

"Dwight just happened to find an experienced nanny who speaks multiple languages fluently and is from Tennessee on a moment's notice?" asked Mercedes suspiciously.

Mercedes knew Dwight had wanted to hire a nanny for months, and Mercedes had always protested, wanting Beth to spend all of her time with family, instead of a stranger. There would be time enough in Beth's life for nannies and tutors, but now, while she didn't have her parents, Mercedes thought it would better if she were surrounded by family.

"He had her on retainer for a while. He's been wanting to bring her on staff," said Beiste as she folded up the list of instructions and put it in her caramel brown leather purse.

"He was just waiting for me to fall on my face, to crash like I did today." Mercedes suspected no one believed she could handle taking care of the baby. She felt like they were all waiting for her to prove them right and fail.

"Not at all sweetheart. He thinks you're wonderful with Beth," Beiste said with a reassuring smile. "He just figured you and Sam would need some extra time to yourselves while he recovers."

"I'm not sure there is a me and Sam anymore," Mercedes said sadly looking out the window. At least her room had a window. Her dad didn't lock her in a windowless cell. She guessed she should've been thankful for that.

"Don't think like that Mercedes. Things will get better," said Beiste patting Mercedes on the leg.

"I don't know how. He has no idea who I am."

Mercedes almost felt like she did back when she was first getting to know Sam, totally outclassed, without a shot that he would ever notice her. Back then her main competition had been Rachel. Mercedes could easily see Rachel's flaws, and she could tell fairly quickly that romance wouldn't last. But this was different, in many ways her opponent was unbeatable. Quinn was not only the mother of his child and his first love, she also was the woman he remembered. The last memories in his mind were of Quinn. There was nothing Mercedes could do to compete with that.

"Maybe not now, but he could get his memory back. You have to stay optimistic."

"I'm trying, but I know the realities of brain injuries. Some things just never heal."

"We've got this far, beating every odd, let's not give up now."

"My dad thinks I'm in denial and that I need to step back from Sam, focus on myself."

"He's just worried about you. As am I. You're not taking care of yourself, young lady," said Beiste with a stern look on her face.

"I'm fine. I just fainted," Mercedes insisted. She was just a little tired and Beiste and her father were acting like she had a hellacious disease.

"Fainting doesn't usually get you admitted to the hospital," Beiste countered.

"My dad is overacting."

"Julian told me you're suffering from dehydration, borderline malnutrition, and extreme fatigue. I think he reacted more than appropriately. I wish we could keep you here for a month, force you to get some rest."

"I can't stay." Mercedes shook her head. "I've got to get back to Sam. He needs me."

"Sam has a big family that can pick up the slack for you while you rest. I've already set things in motion."

"What do you mean? What have you done?"

"I've told Dwight and Sue that you're not going to be able to be there at all hours for Sam. They're going to have to get you some help."

"Beiste no…"

Sue and Dwight probably now thought she was some immature weakling that had to be sent to bed by her parents. It was embarrassing.

"I don't want to hear it Mercedes. You scared the living daylights out of me. When Julian told me you were a patient, my mind immediately went to the worst. I thought about when you were in that car accident. I was worried out of my mind that night. I can't go through that again. You're too precious to me."

Beiste was tearing up, and Mercedes felt bad about putting her through this, but it wasn't like she hadn't done everything in her power to keep their lives running smoothly. If they couldn't have Sam with them at least they could have some semblance of a regular life. Falling out in the staff locker room was not part of the plan. Now Mercedes was worried she had destroyed everything. Being stuck in the hospital away from Beth and from Sam, gave her father, Dwight, and Sue a chance to take away her life. They could bring in someone new to care for both Beth and Sam. It seemed like it was already starting to happen. And Sam wouldn't protest. He didn't even know her anyway.

"But Beiste…" she started, close to a whine.

"But nothing. You are making yourself sick and it's high time that stops. So lie back and rest," said Beiste as she helped Mercedes get under the covers.

"You don't understand. Sam is really in a bad place right now. He trusts me and he is relying on me to help him through it."

"Sam would not want you to jeopardize your health for him."

"He doesn't care about me like that. He doesn't know me."

Mercedes briefly contemplated trying to make him care, pushing things, dropping hints. Then she thought better of it. What would be the point in trying to manufacture a connection with a man that already had a real connection to someone else? A someone he shared a child with.

"I beg to differ. From what I've seen memory or not, Sam cares about you. He was asking all sorts of questions about you and your home life."

"Questions? Like what?' she asked perking up. He had been asking about her when she wasn't around, maybe that was a sign he was starting to remember.

"He thinks you're working too hard, especially with a baby at home."

Mercedes deflated, not what she wanted to hear at all. "Probably just his nice way of saying he wants a new nurse."

"No, I think he is genuinely concerned. He thinks your husband's some deadbeat that makes you do all the work," said Beiste her blue eyes twinkling with amusement.

"He said that?" Mercedes asked smiling. "Oh Beiste. How did you respond?"

It was pretty funny and definitely nice that Sam had been so concerned about her "husband". At the same time, Mercedes felt bad. She was essentially lying to him by not letting him in on the fact that he was the husband he was trashing.

"I just let that one slide. My point is Sam wouldn't want you taking care of him when you're not well."

"I'll stay the night," agreed Mercedes, resigned to the fact that there was no arguing with Beiste.

"As if you had any choice."

"But that's it," she warned. "And don't tell Sam a thing. He has enough on his plate."

"Honey, I should tell you something about my visit with Sam today," said Beiste her mood changing. She toyed with the championship ring on her finger nervously.

"Okay."

"I let him use my phone to call Quinn."

"Why would you do that? Don't tell me he was asking for her again right?" Mercedes was really just grateful Sam was back and thinking of anyone at all, even Quinn. It was a miracle he was even conscious, she wasn't going to belittle that by succumbing to jealousy.

"Something like that. It seemed really important to him."

"I'm glad you did that Beiste." The last thing she wanted was for Beiste to feel bad. She had put Sam first, something they all should be doing right now. "Maybe it will make him feel better."

"How does it make you feel?" asked Beiste gently.

Of course it bothered her that Sam was so preoccupied with Quinn. It actually hurt so much that her stomach often churned at the mention of her name. But all she could do was deal with it. Crying or getting upset wouldn't change anything.

"Everyone keeps asking me that. I'm fine. She is an important person in his life and he remembers her so it makes sense he would want to talk to her."

"I kept feeling like I should fill him in, so he would at least be more sensitive to your feelings."

"He'll find out in time, besides I don't want him to feel like he has to hide anything from me or edit himself. He told me he feels like I'm the one person in his life he can totally trust."

"That's how he always felt about you isn't it?" asked Beiste.

When they had nothing else they had their trust. Begrudging at first, earned piece by piece, tested and proven, until it could no longer be denied. They had each other's backs. Once romantic feelings got mixed in, and the inevitable pain that always chases love, things got rocky and their trust got damaged, but never was it fully destroyed. He had understood about the message to Shane and she had found a way to understand his night with Quinn. When she learned just how long he had held that lie, the fact that he had cheated on her, she still knew in her core that it was the only lie he had told her. She still trusted him enough to take his word. Not that any of that mattered now. It never happened in the current state of Sam's mind.

"For a good while yes. Once we built that trust it just kept strengthening. That's partly why the things I did to hurt him and the things he did to hurt me were so hard on us. We broke our trust, twice. The first time we managed to repair the damage stronger than before. This last time…"

"The accident happened before you could fix things," said Beiste completing Mercedes's thought.

"And that's what I want us to do now. Fix things and restore that trust, but he doesn't remember."

She had such hopes for his recovery. She had dreamed he would open his eyes, smile at her, tell her he loved her, and she would finally get the chance to tell him she loved him too. That she never stopped loving him. Instead he woke up holding Quinn's hand, and asking for her. A cruel twist of fate, but Mercedes really shouldn't have expected anything else. That was how life always went for her.

"A part of him remembers something if he's trusting you. So maybe there's a chance you can get back what you had."

"I hope so Beiste. If he stops trusting me, I'll have nothing. I really will be just a nurse to him."

It hurt to admit that out loud. All these months in a coma and she was accepted as the most important person in Sam's life. She was his wife and she had his power of attorney. She had made all of the decisions. Then one day it was all wiped away. She had become nothing more than the hired help.

"I'm going to go and tuck Beth in," said Beiste rising to her feet.

"Give her kisses from me."

"I will sweetheart. You get some sleep now. Your family needs you healthy," said Beiste as she kissed Mercedes on top of her head.

"Didn't mean to interrupt," said the young attractive woman as she entered the room. She had golden brown skin, and shiny black hair that hung straight along her face, a long haired version of a bob. It was after hours, yet she was still dressed for work, in a fitted red suit, and pumps.

"No you're fine," smiled Beiste turning toward the woman. "I was just leaving."

"I don't think you two have ever met," said Mercedes. "Shannon Beiste this is Dr. Kalina Hill."

"Ms. Beiste. I've seen you around the hospital," Kalina said as she shook Beiste's hand. "You do so much for our fundraising efforts."

"I like to stay busy," Beiste replied picking up her purse and putting it on her shoulder.

"It is an honor to meet you."

"Aren't you sweet. Well I'm off. I'll see you later Mercedes."

"Love you," said Mercedes as she reached up and hugged Beiste, closing her eyes as she squeezed her closer.

"Love you too, very much," said Beiste as she released Mercedes and made her way to the door.

"Nice lady," commented Kalina as she watched Beiste leave the room.

Mercedes nodded in agreement. "She's the best. What brings you by Kali? Did my dad send you so we could plan another play date?"

Kalina Hill was a psychiatrist, practicing for a few years, but she was still young. Most doctors her age would have been just starting out. Julian, embracing his role of father to the fullest, had hooked Mercedes up with Kalina to talk about educational options. Mercedes guessed her father had thought that she would be inspired by Kalina's rise through medical school at such a young. Instead, it had been a weird meal, filled with awkward silences and very little conversation. They both felt very much put on the spot.

"Julian told me you were here, but this is not about school," said Kalina taking a seat in a chair.

"Good. No offense but one awkward lunch about how we are Doogie Howsering through life was enough. Besides I'm only two years ahead of myself and you're like a gazillion."

She laughed. "Actually just five years ahead. But I agree, it was weird. Maybe sometime in the future we could just hang out for fun."

"I'm not sure. I think I might feel like you're trying to psychoanalyze me the whole time."

"I know how to turn it off, trust me," said Kalina pushing the hair off her shoulders.

"So what did you want to see me about?" asked Mercedes.

"Sam."

"What about him?" asked Mercedes.

"I'm his psychiatrist and my first meeting with him is tomorrow."

"Tests for brain damage came back negative I take it?" If his memory loss had been caused by head trauma, he wouldn't need a shrink.

"I would prefer to discuss that with him first," said Kalina, in a very professional tone. That was doctor speak for 'mind your own business', Mercedes knew the language well.

"Absolutely. I understand. I can read his file easily enough anyway. And I know what bringing in a therapist means."

"Even if there were physical injuries he still would need me. I'm going to help him try to adjust. I heard he had a bad reaction to finding out how long he was in a coma and about his memory loss."

"Yes he did." Mercedes's heart still ached thinking about how upset Sam had become. Sam rarely let his guard down that much to show weakness. It was unsettling to see him so distraught.

Kalina smiled. "Hopefully, I can get him on track, in a better state of mind."

"That would be great. Since you can't discuss his case with me, why exactly are you here?"

"I want to tell him about Beth."

"Tomorrow?" asked Mercedes very surprised. She had thought they would've waited until he was home to break that news to him.

"I don't think it can wait."

"What about easing him back into his life?" The entire family was told not to tell Sam anything about what he missed, and here this doctor was ready to just drop it all on him.

"That's still the plan, but certain facts he must be told about immediately. Sam needs to know about his family, so that means telling him about his daughter and you…"

"And Quinn," added Mercedes glumly.

"I will have to touch on Quinn, but I don't want to go into too much detail yet. That's a volatile subject."

"Don't I know it." She was getting ill just thinking about it. "I'm not looking forward to the day he finds out what she did."

"One step at a time. Step one is his immediate family. Will you be well enough to be there tomorrow?" asked Dr. Hill.

"You want me there when you tell him?"

Mercedes wasn't sure if that was such a good idea. It might set him off to see her there, visual proof that she had been lying to him about Beth. She had hoped to come around once the dust had settled and maybe after the doctor had drugged him to keep him calm.

"It makes the most sense. He needs to see both you and Beth, so he can make the proper associations. I really wish Quinn could be there as well, but that's not possible."

"He remembers Quinn, so he'll associate her just fine," said Mercedes squirming uneasily as she pondered Sam's reaction to it all.

"Does the idea of being there make you uncomfortable?"

Mercedes shrugged. "I'll do whatever Sam needs."

"But are you okay with it? Would you rather sit it out?"

Heck yeah, she wanted to sit it out. After the way he reacted to finding out how long he had been in a coma, Mercedes couldn't imagine he'd take finding out about his baby any better.

"What do you think is best for him?" asked Mercedes.

"I'm asking what's best for you," Kalina pressed trying to draw a response from Mercedes.

"Don't do that. Don't turn it on me. Just take care of Sam okay?"

"Mercedes, if you need to talk…"

"I'm good," said Mercedes curtly cutting Kalina off. "There's nothing to say. My husband doesn't remember me. Case closed."

"You make it sound so cut and dry."

"It is. No other way to put it." And nothing she could do to change it.

"He may not remember, but you do. You can't just ignore your feelings. You need to deal with this as much as he does."

She sighed, her shoulders slumping forward. "Let's just make it through tomorrow first. A big day."

"Indeed. So you and the baby be ready about 2pm. Will that work?" asked Kalina typing it into her Iphone.

"We'll be here," said Mercedes forcing a smile, despite the rising dread in the pit of her stomach.

"I'll see you then. And Mercedes?"

"Yeah."

"Don't forget to take care of yourself. You matter too," said Kalina as she stepped out the door into the hallway.

If she really mattered Sam never would've forgotten her. At least tomorrow Beth would have her father back. Mercedes hoped Sam would embrace the baby right away and not have any issues about being a father. Mercedes was less worried about his reaction to finding out about her. Sam had been married before, wouldn't be much of a shock to find out he had done it again. But to find out he fathered a child, and missed out on all this time with her that would be tough. Mercedes really hoped Sam was ready to hear it, like Dr. Hill believed.

She needed to check on him one last time before bed. His life was about to change and he didn't even realize it. She almost wanted to prepare him in some way, to cushion the blow. But that wasn't allowed, there wasn't anything she could say to make it easier anyway. It would just have to be said flat out. Beth is your baby. Mercedes desperately wanted to give him a hug before it all went down. Hopefully, he would be sleeping and she could stroke his hair like she used to, lie by his side and hold his hand. She didn't want him back in a coma, she would never wish that, but she missed the intimacy she could share with him then. Now that he was alert and she was a stranger to him, caresses and loving touches were strictly off limits. The few physical interactions they had already shared had made things incredibly awkward between them. Making his life harder was the last thing she wanted to do.

It was decided. She would just pop into his room for a bit and watch him sleep. No one would ever have to know. Mercedes leaned over and switched off the monitor that alerted the nurses' station when a patient's IV or catheter was removed, before unhooking herself from her IV. In pink fuzzy socks, pink sleep shorts and a yellow happy face t-shirt, she crept silently down the hall to Sam's room.

She didn't even let him know how to contact her. She promised they'd talk again. But how? When? Maybe he was being too clingy and she could hear it in his voice and was trying to get away. He was pretty eager with her on the phone. He needed to remember that the crash didn't just happen and the connection they made during that experience was probably lost. For her at least, it had been years. For Sam, it was all there strong as ever, maybe stronger now that he knew she was by his side when he came out of the coma. It felt like sign, maybe destiny, that she was with him during two huge moments where his life hung in the balance. They were linked somehow. He could feel it.

He turned to stare at the white gold designs being painted on the wall by the moon, as it glowed through the blinds. Sam knew he should try to sleep, he could feel the drain of the day on his body. But his mind wouldn't stop, persistently searching for the lost pieces of his life. They had to still be in there somewhere. He just had to try harder to reach them.

She came in so quietly he almost didn't hear her. But years in the military had trained him to be aware of his surroundings, so he turned instinctively when he heard the floor creak across the room. Mercedes slowly approached, like an apparition, like a dream, in short pajamas. She seemed surprised that he was awake, her eyes widening slightly when she saw him move. She stood quietly by his bed, just staring, her big brown eyes seeming to say so much, but he couldn't decipher their meaning.

"You need a shave," she said reaching out and rubbing his cheek. He caught her hand as it trailed down his face, removing it, but not letting it go.

"I had one earlier in the week. Can't do it daily like I used to in here."

"I used to do that for you. It was one of our things."

"Our things?" Sam asked.

"Our rituals, our routine, our life these last few months."

She talked about it all so intimately, like she was a part of it, a part of him. The cold detachment that most in the healthcare industry had was absent from her. Everything felt so personal, even now with her standing by his bed was something more. This wasn't a professional visit. She'd come to see him, not because she had to, but because she wanted to. He could see it in her eyes. It was as if she wanted something from him, but was reluctant to ask.

He dropped her hand when he felt her fingers twitch beneath his, suddenly embarrassed that he had held it so long. She stared down at her released hand, seeming not sure what to do with it, as if the fact that she was no longer touching him left her off center, lost, and she had to force herself to figure out what to do next. Though the shadows of moonlight often tricked the eyes and maybe it wasn't longing he saw in her brown depths at all, maybe it was simply friendly concern. She had seen him at a really low point, could be she just felt sorry for him and wanted to make sure he wasn't in here melting down. That seemed more plausible than the idea that his nurse was feeling something more for him.

"What are you doing here?" he asked his voice sounding scratchy and hoarse to his own ears. "It's late."

She lowered her eyes, hesitating. "I came to check on you," she said finally turning her large brown eyes on him. Even in the near darkness the color stood out, like iced tea on a sunny day, and Sam felt himself being pulled into them. Her eyes like magnets, drawing him to places he shouldn't go.

"Shouldn't you be home with your baby?" he asked trying to bring himself back from the brink by mentioning reality. She was married with a kid, not some woman that was interested in him. "In bed with your husband?"

She shrugged. "I'd rather be here." She swung her arms back and forth alongside her body like a child being forced to stand still.

He cocked his head at her response, studying her face. "What's up with that Little Nurse? What's wrong that you don't want to go home?" he asked his tone softening as he noticed the tears pool in her eyes. He wanted to kick himself for asking a question that made her react like that.

"I couldn't sleep," she said fingering the edge of his quilt.

"So you came back to the hospital? You're so strange," he chuckled, hoping to lighten things up and make her smile. "Most of us are hoping to break out of this joint, not spend extra time here."

"I like to separate myself from the pack. Try to do the unexpected." She almost smiled, he could see her mouth attempting to lift at the corners, but it was as if she gave up midway.

"Definitely didn't expect to find you standing over my bed like a little angel. You look like you're ready to drop. Do you want to sit?"

Even in the shadows of the room her brown skin glowed bright like a halo, her black hair hanging in waves about her shoulders, and her eyes unusually large as they strained to adjust to the lack of light. She created quite a vision, and Sam couldn't tear himself away.

She shook her head. "Why aren't you sleeping?"

"I didn't much feel like it. I'm the opposite of you. I've had too much rest."

Truth was his mind wouldn't let him sleep. Even when he managed to stop thinking about all that he couldn't remember, he was still haunted by Quinn. Her voice calling him, echoing in the darkness, and lately her cries were sounding more urgent.

"Sometimes my mind is so filled, thinking about everything in my life, that I just can't sleep. Actually most nights I don't even bother." She wrapped her arms about herself, rubbing up and down as if she were cold.

"Is that what's giving you nightmares?" he asked glancing at her quickly before turning his attention to his hands in his lap. "I heard you talking in your sleep earlier when you took a nap in the chair. Sounded like something big was on your mind."

"I don't know. I never remember my dreams." She swayed on her feet, putting her hand on the bed to steady herself. Sam reached out and grabbed her elbow, even though she was already leaning on the bed. The overwhelming urge to touch her returned and this time he didn't fight it.

"I really think you should sit down." He moved over on the bed, to make room for her. "Only if you want to," he added when he saw her hesitation.

Mercedes bit her lip contemplating his suggestion, her full lips reddening slightly from the pressure of her teeth. "Thanks," she said. Sam continued to focus on her mouth, imagining her lips in places he shouldn't. He was so fixated that he was startled when she got in the bed next to him.

He really hadn't thought this through. With her this close to him he was very aware of her. He could tell she wasn't wearing a bra under that tight t-shirt, her full breasts and her rounded belly strained beneath the fabric, and he briefly wondered if that was why the yellow face on her chest was smiling so damn wide. Plus she smelled like vanilla and flowers. It was driving him nuts at such close proximity, made him want to lean closer to her so he could inhale that scent. Then she moved, making herself more comfortable on top of his quilt, her legs, nice and thick, surprisingly long for a woman her size, so creamy brown and smooth, were fully on display, begging him to just reach down and touch them.

He ran his hand over his hairy chin, cursing himself for even suggesting she get in the bed. He couldn't even think straight now. How was he going to function and carry on a conversation with her when all his thoughts were coming from below the belt? Sam tried to pull himself together. He had faced down enemies in battle. He could handle one little woman in his bed without losing it.

"So how shall we spend the night, since we're both members of the Insomnia Association? Ghost stories? Embarrassing childhood memories? Ninety-nine bottles of beer on the wall?"

"Missed you," she murmured.

He looked down to find her eyes closed, snuggling into the pillow they shared, her body curved toward him. He reached out and pushed the hair out of her face, fully knowing that touching her was the absolute wrong move. But he couldn't help himself she looked so pretty in the moonlight. And so damn young. He retracted his hand feeling a little unnerved that he was attracted to someone that clearly was inappropriate for him, on so many levels. Her eyes were still closed, but she was smiling as she pressed herself into his side, her hair spilling over the pillow and onto his chest. Against his better judgment, Sam didn't move. There was something about having her close that he liked.

"You missed me?" he asked. She nodded, eyes still closed. "Missed me since earlier today? We haven't been apart that long."

"It felt like forever," she said softly.

"I guess I should be flattered. It's been a long time since I had a woman in my bed. Nine months I guess." He tried to joke but didn't feel much like laughing when he felt her rubbing his chest.

"Not that long." She opened her eyes and looked up at him, tears brimming over her dark lashes. Sam's breath caught in his throat as he stared into those eyes. What was it about her? He ran his finger along the side of her face, as he continued to watch her. The tears finally fell, and Sam tried to catch every one as he brushed them away with his fingertips.

"What is wrong? Please tell me," he pleaded pulling her closer to his body so her head rested on his chest. Sam had given up on staying strong. He just needed to hold her. The pull toward her was completely incomprehensible to him, but he wasn't going to fight it.

"I'm so tired Sam. I think this stuff they gave me is kicking in. Can I stay with you?" she asked as she continued to stroke his chest.

"I don't know if that's a good idea. What would your husband think?" he asked as he pressed his lips against her hair. He was totally screwed now, allowing himself to get wrapped up in her was a bad idea.

"You don't want me," she pouted looking up at his face. Sam wanted to laugh, she looked so cute, but thought better of it because she seemed so serious, like she was really hurt by the idea he didn't want her.

"I didn't say that. I'm just not sure you're aware of your actions right now. I don't want you to do anything you might regret." Really he was concerned about himself. Regret was just around the corner, as he sat in his bed, in the dark, with an armful of nurse Mercedes.

"I could never regret you." She said it so emotionally, as if she wanted to convince him of that fact.

Sam's brows knitted together in confusion. "You're not making any sense."

"Yes I am," she insisted. "You just don't remember."

"What don't I remember?" he asked almost holding his breath as he awaited her answer.

She leaned up and kissed him softly on the lips, pulling back to stare him in the eyes. The sweetest smile spread across her face and Sam couldn't help but return it. The kiss had felt so nice. She kissed him again, deeper this time her full lips with gentle pressure against his. He opened his mouth to kiss her completely. He was going to hell for this anyway right? So might as well make it good. She smiled against his mouth before kissing him back with rising intensity her tongue gently sweeping against his, little pockets of sweet warmth in his mouth. Sam gave her one last peck on the lips, before pulling away.

"Goodnight," she said through lidded eyes, a dopey smile on her face.

"Goodnight," he whispered. She climbed across him to the foot of the bed, curling into a ball by his legs. She fit perfectly, as if she had occupied that spot before.

Sam had no idea what just happened. She clearly was on some drugs. But he guessed he was right about that vibe, the way she kissed him there was no mistaking it, his nurse was into him. But why? Was she some sort of wacko that fell for comatose men? Or did she have a thing for patients? She had made it seem like something more, like he should have known she felt this way. So strange. Like everything else in his life at this point.

With his little nurse asleep at the end of the bed, Sam was again left alone with his thoughts, which inevitably drifted back to Quinn. Their phone conversation had been good, but it left him filled with so many questions. Something was off with her, he was sure of it. Or maybe he just wanted to be sure of it. Thinking Quinn had some secret or was somewhere needing him were whole lot better scenarios than the more likely option that she just didn't care all that much. So much could have changed in three years, maybe what they had always felt for each other, that connection, that bond, had been lost along the way. Sam had no way of knowing until he started getting filled in about his life. He hoped that would be a soon, because he was tired of being a clueless bystander to his own history.

Mercedes shifted by his foot, placing her arm across his leg as she repositioned herself. It was safe to assume she knew about his deformed lower leg, being his nurse she would probably have fairly detailed knowledge of his entire body. Normally Sam felt strange about revealing his injury to women, he didn't like the look of pity or worse the look of revulsion, he usually found in their eyes. Most days he felt fine, like his normal self, like he could take on the world and nothing could hold him back. Then he had to undress and it all came rushing back, all that he was lacking. Those were the times that he couldn't help but feel like half of a man.

Brittany had taken his injury in stride, but Sam figured she had to. She was his wife and she loved him, well claimed to love him. It was easy to be around hjer at any rate. He didn't have to pretend there wasn't something different under his clothes. Quinn had been another story. Circumstances at the limo crash site forced him to reveal himself to her. Sam had braced himself for her reaction. He figured he would mainly see pity with just a hint of disgust. When he got her reaction, he was way beyond surprised. Quinn still saw him as the man he always was. She even still had an attraction to him. It reminded him of when he saw her at her worst, in the psych ward, sick from too many mind altering drugs. She looked as beautiful as ever to him. It didn't change a thing, it was the same Quinn he had always loved. Under that blanket that night it had hit him, in a way this was the same thing. Physical changes didn't impact how they felt about each other. He felt silly for even thinking otherwise.

Now it was three years later and the wrong woman was by his side. He remembered being caught between life and death with Quinn, only to open his eyes and find a little brown girl with a super huge grin in her place. It was so hard to get used to. The one person he was so sure would be there was nowhere to be found, and a complete stranger was ever present, his constant support. As much as he wished for Quinn to come walking through the door with her sparkling green eyes, and dazzling smile, he just as much didn't want his nurse to go. Sure he was a little freaked out to find her standing over his bed in the middle of the night like that crazy lady from Misery, but he was glad she came. Something about her was comforting. He guessed that was the hallmark of a good nurse, being a comforting presence. Sam couldn't pinpoint it exactly, but there was something else about her too. It felt right to have Mercedes in his bed. And that was the thought that freaked him out most of all.