Rather than discuss the situation where Remy could still see us should he look up from his game, I led both Logan and John out into the street and into the side alley. Immediately Logan had hold of my chin as he inspected my face. I could sense John zoning in on my cut up hands which I quickly shoved behind my back.
"Should I even ask?" Logan asked with a sigh. "Because really, what the hell?"
"Nadya," John added. "Not even two hours on your own…what happened?" I wrung my hands and shrugged my shoulders.
"There was a thing, well a guy, well three guys and an alley…but I'm fine! See?" I proceeded to wave my arms around turn in a circle, an act which John seemed to find hilarious. Logan on the other hand was hardly impressed. Giving my cheesiest grin, I gave him a nudge. "Really, I'm fine. Remy-"
"Oh Remy is it?" he replied, raising an eyebrow.
"Gambit…Remy, whatever, it's his name." I crossed my arms and looked between the two men. "Remy saved me from some stuff, so I think he's all right."
"Saved you? I thought you said it wasn't a big deal." I gave John a death glare and gave a sigh.
"It's not," I assured him. "Jesus Christ guys, come on. I'm here, you're here, and he's right in there! A little bit of focus would be appreciated." Logan only glared as John shrugged. Honestly, men have the strangest priorities.
"Fine," Logan finally replied with a huff. "He the one in purple…at the table you were at?" I nodded and made to lead the two back into the bar, but Logan held up an arm. "Oh no, you've done your part, I'll handle this." John nodded in agreement.
"He knows me, and he likes me. I'm going with you." It seemed pretty obvious to me that should Logan "Mr. Kick Ass and Take Names" go in there alone, Remy might feel a bit cornered.
He shook his head and nodded toward John. "No, I need you to out here in case he bolts."
"He'll be less likely to bolt, if I go with you," I replied through gritted teeth.
"No! Could you not argue? For once in your life, would you just listen, follow your fucking orders, and do as you're told?" He shouted. I took a step back, surprised at the outburst. Even John, looked a little taken aback.
"Hey, I'll take the back entrance," he offered. Then it was just Logan and me standing silently outside the bar. Neither of us said anything for a few moments. I could only stare blankly at my feet trying to remember a time when Logan had yelled at me in actual anger and not just irritation. I couldn't.
He sighed. "Look I'm sor-" I quickly cut him off.
"Stop, no…I'm sorry I didn't realize I was a soldier again. I wasn't aware I was back in the business of taking orders."
"Nadya, come on. I didn't mean it like that." I could see the regret reflecting in his eyes.
"Yeah you did, Logan. You did…" I ran a hand through my tangled hair and looked over to the center square. In another life, maybe I could have been dancing with those little kids by the fountain. Maybe I could have been making out with that soccer player across the street. Maybe I could even have been that mother pushing the stroller with her husband. But this wasn't another life…this was my life.
"You know, I was a pretty messed up kid," I began, not entirely sure where I was heading. "I watched my little brother be murdered by the man I later was totally in love with…that's right, with Wade. And honestly, if you didn't see it you're a fucking moron. Anyway, my mother was taken from me, and I never saw my brother Piotr again. I ended up with you. I was eight years old, scared shitless and alone, but I had you.
"I didn't know what it was about you, but I could tell you were different. It's taken me a few years, but I think I finally figured out what it was." I paused and turned to Logan. His eyes seemed to pierce through me as I came to a realization.
"You were the one person on that stupid team who never, ever forced me to do anything. Even if it was for my own safety, you never ordered me around. It was always "Nadya, it might be a good idea for you to stand in back" or "Nadya, please follow John this time" or "Nadya, if you upset Viktor again, he'll hit you." You made me feel like I had some choice…even if I didn't."" I gave a small laugh.
"And let's face it, when did I ever really have a choice in anything?" Logan didn't return the laugh, so I sighed and continued on. "I guess it was stupid of me to think things were the same. I grew up…I have opinions and ideas and the stones to actually voice them. I grew up, but you can't see it. All you see is some kid who still sucks her thumb when she sleeps and is still afraid of bees. I grew up…you didn't."
Too embarrassed to actually wait for a response, I turned and moved to join John in the back. I truly hadn't meant to say anything of what I had. Putting Logan on the spot was not something that made me feel very good; in fact I felt downright shitty. But could only hope, he wouldn't resent me for what I said.
When I reached John, he looked like he was ready to say something, but I shook my head. "Don't say anything," I said blankly. He nodded and went to lean against the wall.
"How do you think it's going in there?"
I shrugged, honestly hoping Logan was going to get the shit kicked out of him; though the odds of that happening were minimal. Suddenly a crash from farther down the alley caught our attention. All I saw was a swish of a coat, but I shuddered in apprehension anyway. I glanced at John who was staring hard in the direction of the noise.
"What's-"
John shushed me, and I immediately shut my mouth. After a few moments, John squeezed my hand and without a second glance moved forward. "You wait here." I nodded. I don't know how I knew something was wrong, but I was dead scared of whatever it was John was walking into. As he disappeared from my sight, I strained to hear what was happening.
My attention had completely transferred from what could be happening in the bar to what was happening in the alley. After what seemed to be a few minutes, I took a tentative step forward. "John?" I called softly. "John, answer me please."
I took a few more steps, but cursed as I remembered him telling me not to move. Turning around, I let out a scream quickly muffled by a large, cold hand. Staring back at me with the same sick grin I remembered from my childhood was Viktor Creed. I tried to push away, but he grabbed my wrist and flung me to the wall. I made to blast him away, but with a speed I didn't think possible he moved his hand from my mouth to my throat.
I gasped for breath as Viktor squeezed tighter, raising me from the ground. "Hello, little Nadya," he murmured, stroking my cheek with his other hand. I tried to hold in my tears, but I was too busy trying to breathe. "I know someone who is very eager to see you again."
"Please," I gasped, but Viktor ignored my single plea. The world around me began growing dark, and the last thing I saw before completely losing consciousness were his cold eyes, shining in pleasure at my pain.
What I find incredibly interesting is how people choose to prioritize their lives. For example, there was this one time when Joanne went on a date with this guy from her work. She had been making goo-goo eyes at him for weeks and always had a new hilarious story to tell me about Gino…Jerry? No, Gino…oh screw it. She was really into Whatshisface. Despite the obvious attraction and the fact he brought to this amazing restaurant on the lake, the whole evening fell to pieces. Apparently, she was certain she had forgotten to remove the drier lint from the filter and every one of their conversations returned to laundry and drier lint safety. Be still my swooning heart, right?
Why she didn't call me to check, I may never know. Why the drier lint suddenly took precedence over her first night out in three years, I may also never know. The point here is that something really important may be happening to you, but in that same moment, something completely unrelated and inconsequential may be wheedling its way into your mind. That is precisely what happened to me right before I lost consciousness in Viktor Creed's arms. I remember thinking, of all things, "I forgot to return the girls' library books…Jo doesn't like late fees." What the Hell?