Sorry for the delay, pals- been busy job-hunting! This chapter was the most difficult to write so far. I considered making chapter 6 another SQ back-and-forth thing, but I figured five chapters of that was enough for you guys! ;) As always, reviews are welcomed and appreciated! Enjoy!
Chapter 6: A Good Reason
It only takes Emma ten minutes to scour the four floors of the parking complex. Leave it to Regina to make everything so impractical. Finally, on the dark, basement level, she spots it—her car. She slows to a walk when she nears the Mercedes. She can see Regina's outline—her back to her. She steadies herself, not really knowing what to expect or how much Regina might have heard.
"Ms. Swan."
Gulp.
"Regina, look, I can explain."
"You damn well better be able to," she demands, finally turning around.
Emma's heart breaks. She can tell she has been crying.
"I don't know what all you might have heard back there, but—"
"Stop," she flails her hand in front of her face, her face sobering in an instant.
Emma nods and obeys. She watches the older woman crinkle her brow in thought.
"I don't blame you."
"You don't?"
"No."
Emma takes a step towards her. She's not really sure what to do next. Are they going to fight? Is Regina going to kill her? Is Regina going to cry again? In front of her? God, she hopes not. She doesn't know if she could live through that.
"I'm sorry, Regina," Emma breathes, offering her hand out.
Regina shakes her head from side to side, rejecting the gesture. "You shouldn't be. I understand."
Emma's hand falls. "But Henry…"
"Yes, I know. It will be his choice. I heard as much. I guess I should thank you for that?" The bite in Regina's voice is enough to bring Emma to her knees.
"I don't know what I'll do if he stays," Emma admits, barely above a whisper.
Regina finally looks into the eyes across from hers. "And I don't know what I'll do if he goes."
Emma can't help herself when tears begin to spill down Regina's cheeks. She reaches up and wipes them gently. Regina cowers away as though she's been burned by the touch, but Emma isn't deterred. Instead, she cups the other woman's cheek tenderly.
"Please don't cry."
"Emma, it's not just Henry. I—I don't want you to go either," Regina exhales, her eyes searching Emma's face for some sort of response.
"Huh?" is all Emma can manage. Her hand falls away from Regina's face and back down to her side.
"Just…" she shakes her head "Forget it. I know how you feel Emma. I can't say that I don't feel the same way, but—"
"But you can't say that you do, either?" Emma sighs knowingly.
Regina nods, her mind promptly settles on Robin, but her eyes never leave Emma's.
"So I don't blame you for wanting to go. In your situation, I, too, would run. I almost wish I could now," she scoffs. "I'm the last person you should want to be with, Emma. I can't return your love. Not now, not ever."
Emma's heart is breaking. But, despite the fact, she achieves a brave face. She knew this is how this conversation would go should they ever have the chance to have it. This is no surprise to her. That's why she's going home. Part of her wants to tell Regina everything—how, ever since she came into town, she has been enamored with the woman… from her condescension and biting remarks to her surprising warmth and brilliant smile. And there was nothing that Emma would not do for her. She had proven that time and again. Regina, on the other hand, was new to this whole "being loved" thing. It had been a pleasant surprise from Robin, but from Emma? Well, that was just totally unexpected, but a beautiful breath of fresh air and a sudden realization that she had untapped feelings for the blonde. It was terrifying, to be honest.
"I wanted to meet the baby, you know?" Emma smiles timidly, changing the subject.
Regina sniffles a bit and straightens up and, in that moment, is thankful for Emma's pigheadedness.
"He is quite cute… to be a Charming."
"Hey!"
They're silent for a beat. Emma, fearing it could be her last opportunity to do so, reaches out to pull Regina into an embrace, but, just like them being together, it is not to be.
Both women step away from each other and look across the pavement when they hear the steady pounding of footsteps. The intrusive sound grows louder and louder until they see Belle running towards them, visibly distraught.
"Belle? What's the matter?" Emma asks, putting her hands up to stop her from barreling into them.
"Oh, thank god. They said you'd be here. The dagger… it's gone," she exclaims.
"What?!"
"This morning, when I got up, Rumple was nowhere to be found. I had this awful feeling, so I went to where I keep the dagger and it was gone. The heart, too."
"The heart? Whose heart?"
Emma tilts her head back, groaning and rolling her eyes. "The other fucking heart. Of course."
"WHOSE HEART?" Regina asks again, ready to murder the other two women.
Emma turns back to her. "Remember me telling you that, when I saved your heart, that there was another one as well, that I didn't take?"
She nods. Emma looks back towards Belle for her to continue the story.
"Apparently Rumple took it, as well as the dagger, when you all defeated Zelena. He had given the dagger to me and, at first, I refused, but took it because he seemed so sincere. I placed it in a locked box in the library."
"And the heart?" Regina grates out, the young woman really starting to piss her off.
"Right, the heart. I don't know who it belongs to. He had it when he got back to his shop. He told me he was going to find the owner. I didn't think he would ever just take off with it."
Regina shakes her head. She knows Gold better than that. "Whoever the heart belongs to, Zelena was trying to control. And now, it seems that Rumple may be as well."
"What would he gain from doing that?" Emma asks, looking thoroughly confused. She's mentally kicking herself for not at least trying to take the other heart. "What could he possibly want with a heart?"
"Me," Regina says, biting down on her bottom lip. "With the curse broken and my mother and sister both out of the way, I am the last thing stopping him from total control."
"But he wouldn't," Belle whispers. She can't make herself believe that her reformed lover would return to his dark ways.
"Trust me dear, he would. And he will."
Emma's face contorts. Now what? The woman she so desperately needs to get away from is, once again, in need of her assistance.
"No, Emma. Don't even think about it. I can handle this. Belle and I will start in the shop."
"Regina—"
"No." She takes a deep breath, her face stern. She motions for Belle to get into the car and steps towards Emma, placing her hands on her forearms. "This, at least, gives me a good reason to send Henry off with you, to protect him from whatever Gold has up his sleeve."
Emma can't deny that it's a pretty good cover, but still. Is now the time to walk away? She does have Robin, her mind reasons, much to her heart's dismay.
"But they won't buy it about me. I'm the savior."
Regina rolls her eyes and smiles, almost imperceptibly. "It's not like I can send Henry to New York alone, now, is it?"
Emma nods a bit. She has a point. "Okay," she finally manages. At least, this way, she is spared the humiliation and Henry won't hate her… much.
Regina slides into the driver's seat and starts the car, pulling away from Emma and the hospital.
_.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._
"But she's the savior," Henry had, of course, offered.
"Even heroes have their limits, Henry," his mother had said to him, squeezing his hands tight, hoping that someday, he'd understand just what those words meant.
"What do you say kid? Back to your friends, the city, Roberta's pizza, early morning summer soccer practice?"
He looks between Emma and Regina, genuinely torn.
"We can come back whenever, right? To visit? And mom, you can come see us. Grandma and grandpa, too?"
"Sure," Emma says, trying her best to sound sincere.
"I'll still have my memories, right?"
Emma looks to Regina, questioningly. She knows what would be best, but she also knows Henry won't agree to it if he will forget Storybrooke.
"Of course."
He begrudgingly nods. He'd be lying if he said he didn't have a good life in New York. He had Emma, lots of friends, a nice home, and pretty much anything he could ask for. On the other hand, this place was magic, in every sense of the word, and a small part of him was hoping that both of his mothers would find their happy endings here. He had watched his adopted mother transform from the uptight, demanding mayor with flashes of evil to his hero, one of the good guys. And she was happy now. She had a new, blossoming relationship as well as another little one to look after. His birth mother, though, was not happy here and he could tell it. He had known it from the moment he and Emma got back into town. He wouldn't be the one to stop her from her own happy ending and if it wasn't here, in Storybrooke, then it just wasn't. And he would do whatever it takes to make sure she gets it.
"Then it's settled," Emma breathes a sigh of relief mingled with the sadness of finality. "We'll leave at sunset."
"And Emma?" Regina lowers her voice.
"Yeah?"
"Try not to fall in love with any flying monkeys this time, okay?"
Emma shakes her head, a smile spreading across her lips. She wonders, momentarily, if that was a hint of jealousy she heard laced in Regina's voice. Either way, she's thankful for her trying to lighten the mood.
"I'll try."
_.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._
"Are you alright, darling?"
Regina forces a smile over her shoulder. "Yeah, I'm okay."
Robin walks into Henry's old bedroom and kneels in front of her, taking the picture of a young Henry out of her hands before holding them tightly.
"We'll figure this out, okay? And maybe Henry will change his mind and stay?"
Robin would be lying to himself if he said that he wasn't at least a bit happy to see Emma Swan leaving town. She, after all, was a constant divisive factor in everyone's lives here. He hadn't been around when she came storming into town the first time, but from the stories divulged over pints at The Rabbit Hole, she had made quite the mess as she attempted to earn the love of her son and break the curse. And even now, she took away a large percentage of Regina's attention, much to his dismay. Henry, though, he would be sad to see go… if only for the pain it was causing the woman in front of him now.
"He'll want to be with Emma. I know that. He wouldn't leave her."
"I don't understand how he could turn his back on the woman who raised him for most of his life. Emma just blew into town and completely wrecked his mind."
She can tell that he's trying to be sincere, but those words make her want to lash out, tell him he's wrong. But she doesn't. She has accepted this defeat before. Only this time, it hurts much deeper.
"I'm sorry. I spoke out of anger for your pain."
She just nods and sniffles a bit before letting him pull her into his arms and back onto the bed. She leans her head against his chest and takes a deep, calming breath, willing her tears not to deceive her strong façade.
Silence.
She waits a few moments, pressing her ear closer to Robin's chest. Still, nothing. She jerks away from him, sitting stiffly upright in the bed.
"It's you," she whispers, her eyes glazing over.
_.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._
If there was one thing Emma Swan took pride in, it was her ability to say goodbye quickly and efficiently, with no loose ends or lingering feelings. Her life in the system had given her that much. But here, in this place, with these people, she was struggling.
Regina had filled her in on the situation with Robin. Emma had, in her usual way, questioned her about her safety. She had been assured that Robin was harmless unless Gold had something more sinister up his sleeve. The idea made Emma hesitate and offer to stay a bit longer, but Regina had sworn she'd be able to take care of herself. Besides, this was her game—controlling hearts. I survived decades without you, dear, Regina had laughed.
Henry had taken his time, used the day to spend time with his grandparents, the new baby, Archie, Granny and Ruby, The Lost Boys, and some others. He had promised them all he'd come visit soon and that they could come stay with him and Emma in New York. He had told them he'd show them the Statue of Liberty, his neighborhood, Central Park, and even take them ice-skating at Christmas, much to Emma's chagrin. That's the last thing she needed… a bunch of ragamuffins wreaking havoc under her watch.
She nudges him playfully after he waves a final goodbye to the crowd now gathered at the town's border. This was all too familiar. She feels like this had just happened days ago when Regina had sent her away with her memories the first time.
"Go wait in the car, kid. I'll be just a second."
Henry begins to walk off before he stops and turns back, running full-speed to Regina. There are no words. They just hold onto each other like it's the last time they'll ever be face-to-face.
"Mom, Dad."
Mary Margaret hands the baby over to Archie before wrapping Emma in her arms, crying against her shoulder.
"You'll come back soon, right, Emma?"
Emma fake-smiles and nods. This is too hard. Is she really giving up her parents just because of one woman? Was it really worth all that? This would be so much easier if she had never met her parents and was just running away from another bad relationship or family situation like she had done numerous times in the past. She truly hopes, though, deep down, that she'll see them again sometime. Somehow.
She whispers her goodbyes to them, then walks over to her newborn brother. She kisses him gently on the forehead. "See ya around, kid."
"Neal," David smiles, putting his hand on her shoulder.
Emma looks up at him, her mouth open. "Neal?"
"Yeah."
She looks back down to the peaceful infant. "You take care of these two, okay, Neal?" She rubs the back of his little hand and forces herself away.
She waves her goodbyes to the rest of the crowd and finally turns to leave.
Regina, having finally pulled away from Henry and sent him to the car, walks silently from the group and closer to the town line. Emma follows, only turning around once more to take everyone in.
The two women turn to face one another when they're standing inches away from the border.
"Come with us," Emma finally blurts out as though she had been holding it in for ages.
Regina's eyes widen. Her heart speeds up as she briefly considers the proposition. "You know I can't."
"Why not? Now is the perfect time. You can escape this mess, have a new start, a new family… with us. We'll come back here as often as you'd like. And there, no one will have ever known you as evil or bad or anything. You'll just be you, just Regina. With your son and your… me."
Emma's heart and soul are in tangles right now and she's grasping at straws. She thought maybe her leaving, maybe this last-ditch effort, would make Regina change her mind. It's not like they had spent months professing their love to one another, but that wouldn't really be Regina and Emma at all. No, this hatred, brewing over the years, with flashes of camaraderie and understanding had blossomed into something neither one of them needed to label. And Emma foolishly thought that would be enough.
Regina turns back towards Robin and it suddenly makes sense to Emma. She doesn't want her. She is choosing him.
"His heart, I—"
Emma nods and swallows hard, unable to stop the single tear that slides down her cheek.
After staring down at her feet for what seems to be an eternity, she finally manages to speak again.
"I don't want to remember," she whispers.
"Emma…"
"No. You don't get to decide this, okay? Before we left the first time, I had all these weird feelings for you. I didn't quite understand them. I guess it all really hit me in Neverland. It didn't happen again until Hook made me remember in New York. I didn't realize until then how good it felt to be numb, to not think about you. That's when I knew I lo—" she stops suddenly, praying that Regina didn't hear that. "Make me forget, Regina. As much as it hurts me and as unbelievably beautiful as you are, I don't want to ever have you cross my mind again."
She watches those warm brown eyes frost over before they fill with water. She has to look away. If she could do it with a clear conscience, she'd leave with Emma right now. But would it even work out? They hadn't even fully admitted how they felt about one another. But Regina never thought that Emma would want to totally wipe her out of her memory, out of her heart.
"Are you sure?"
"I think it's for the best," she clenches her jaw, trying with everything in her not to buckle.
"Everything? Your parents, your friends? And Henry, too? You want me to take his memories?" Regina chokes out.
She nods.
"But why, Emma? Why Henry? I can't fathom him not remembering me again. Please don't-"
Regina is crying openly now, her hand gripping Emma's upper arm tightly.
"Pull yourself together," Emma spits, not wanting her parents to think any more of her previous confession. She knows if they thought her love for Regina was the only reason for her leaving, they'd find a way to stop her.
"I can't, Emma. I can't just let him walk away and not remember me. Please?"
Brown eyes plead desperately with green ones.
"Fine, Regina. But give him time. He needs to remember how good his life there is. I'm sure there's something you can do," Emma finally gives in, not really thinking about what she's saying. The only thing she wants to do right now is get in that car and drive as fast and as far away as she can. That's what she was born to do. Emma Swan, the runner.
Regina nods, trying to wrap her head around something that might work. Then it hits her.
"The book."
"What about it?"
"He has it, right?"
"I'm sure he does… can we hurry and do this?"
Emma is quickly losing her resolve. She doesn't want to leave her family behind. She doesn't want to give Regina up this easily, but she can't take this pain. Ever since she and Henry returned to Storybrooke, she had planned to take him back home. That was until she had become able to put a tag on her feelings for Regina.
No. No more. They had a good life there. Henry was happy. She was… well, she was okay. It certainly didn't feel like this and, right now, that's all she wants—to not feel like this. No worries of consequence.
Regina closes her eyes and mouths something in a tongue Emma doesn't recognize before she unrolls the small scroll she had been gripping in her hand. Her eyes search Emma's for hesitation once more. When she finds none, she dejectedly whispers the enchantment, causing a swirl of purple smoke to float from the scroll and hover near the town line.
"Go," she whispers, turning her back to Emma.
She steals one more glance towards the town, towards their sad faces, before spinning on her heel and crossing over the border.
Regina pushes her way past the crowd, past Robin, and enters a sprint to her car. She needs to be alone right now. This pain is unbearable. Mary Margaret and David share a knowing glance, their faces falling simultaneously. It all makes sense now.
"She's gone," she whispers, the realization that Emma has no intention of ever returning to Storybrooke digs into their chests as they cling to one another. And it's partly their fault. They had given her up; they had instilled this desire to run, to escape, in her so long ago.
_.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._
"You did finish your breakfast this morning, right?"
"Yeah, mom! You don't remember? 'Make sure you eat everything, kid! We've got a lot of driving to do'," he mimics, earning a spirited prod from his mother.
"Well, I just wanted to make sure. Sorry my mind has been a little in and out the past couple of days. That case had me rattled."
Henry nods.
"Thanks for taking the trip with me."
"Yeah, yeah. Let's just get back home! You know I have soccer tomorrow."
"Like I would forget. You know your old mom's memory is sharp as a, uh… what's the expression?"
"Sharp as a tack," Henry laughs, rolling his eyes.
"Yeah, that. Now take a nap or something," she jokes, eyeballing the Now Leaving Maine sign. "We've got a long drive."
"Next stop, New York!" He yells, shimmying down comfortably into the car's seat.
"Home," Emma whispers, then smiles brightly at her growing boy. She couldn't imagine her life being any more perfect than it is in this moment.