Chapter 41

(SAM)

2:30 PM

Dr. Kalina Hill rushed in the living room of the Evans mansion, bundled up in a long grey wool tweed coat. "Okay are you feeling extremely depressed or suicidal?"

"No," said Sam with a shake of his head from his spot on the couch.

"Are you talking to the furniture, walls or any other inanimate object?" she asked taking a seat next to him.

He took a sip of his glass of water. "No."

"Did your memory come back?" The look of concern she had on her face when she first arrived was slowly fading.

"Nope. Still a blank."

"So why am I here?" she asked her eyes narrowing in suspicion.

"I needed to talk to you."

Kali shook her head as she stood up. "You said it was an emergency. In fact you had a very large man escort me from my private meeting."

Sam smirked. "At the spa."

Kali folded her arms across her chest, glaring down at Sam. "He escorted me into a tinted window unmarked car and whisked me over here to you."

"That's right. Daley was the one that picked you up. Did he treat you well?" Sam contently took another sip from his glass, ignoring the sour mood that had crept up on his therapist.

"He was a perfect gentleman apologized for inconveniencing me the whole way. You on the other hand have some explaining to do."

"That's why you're here. I need to run something by you. Get your advice."

"Advice requires an appointment, which we have next week," she said picking up the bag at her feet and putting it on her shoulder.

"Can't wait until then. I need help now," said Sam putting down his glass and walking over to her.

"Sam I have other patients and a life," she said with an exacerbated sigh.

"You were at the spa, how much life could you possibly be having?" He had managed to track her down after calling her office, the hospital administration, and even her personal cell phone, the number he managed to wrangle from Santana, via Puck.

"Down time. Necessary in my field, I am surrounded by stressful individuals, such as you."

"I wouldn't have disturbed you from your precious 'me' time if it weren't important."

"It better be. I left my car in the lot. I'll probably get a ticket."

"Give me your keys," Sam said holding out his hand. "Daley will get your car and bring it here."

"I'm not letting some strange man drive my car."

"What's the big deal? Same as valet parking right?" She liked to make things difficult. All she had to do was sit down and let him talk. Kali had this way of making everything needlessly painful.

Kali sighed and reluctantly handed Sam her keys. "I'm only doing this because I can't get any more points on my license."

"You get points for parking tickets?"

"Accumulate enough of them you do."

"Something tells me you have a lead foot."

"There is no data for you to make that assessment."

"Call it a hunch. Besides I know from personal experience how dangerous women drivers can be." His mind went to Mercedes, and the night she told him about their accident, and all of her attempts to explain away her poor driving choices.

"How are things between you and your wife? Make any progress?" asked Kali returning to her seat on the couch.

"I didn't bring you here to talk about Mercedes." That was the last subject he wanted to discuss. She had messed with his head enough the past week. His thoughts going to the story she told him about their marriage more often than he liked.

"Fine, but I am charging you double. What did you need to talk to me about?" She dug in her bag and pulled out her notebook.

"Here take this," said Sam holding a bill out to her.

"It's a dollar bill," said Kali slowly, taking it from his hand, examining it like it was counterfeit.

Sam took a seat in the chair in front of the fireplace. "Yes. I need your discretion."

"You already have it with doctor patient confidentiality."

"I need you to listen off the record. Take the dollar as your retainer."

"I'm a therapist not a lawyer. Nothing we say in our sessions will be discussed with anyone else. It will remain in your private medical record."

Sam didn't trust shrinks. He was sure they either used all the info they gathered in their sessions for their books, or they were the ones that leaked salacious tales to the media. Kali had his whole life at her fingertips and he was about to give her even more ammunition to use against him. He needed assurances that she would keep things private.

"What happens if I get a new doctor? Would you pass that file on?"

"Yes your file would go to your new therapist. What's going on Sam? Do you want to fire me?"

"Yes, so don't bother taking any notes."

"Okay, in that case, give me back my keys and tell Daley I will take that ride to get my car with him," she said standing up once again. "He can just drop me off at the spa."

"No you can't go. I need to talk to you."

"You just fired me. Tell it to your new doctor."

"That's what the dollar is for. I need you to listen, but unofficially, off the record."

She cocked her head to the side and observed him, as if she were weighing her options.

"Here take this dollar back," she said holding the dollar in the air. "And pour me a drink instead." Sam smiled as he got up and took the dollar from her hand putting it in his pocket. "You're taller than I thought."

"That's what happens when I stand up." He went to the wet bar and started making her drink.

"I get that thank you. I just mean you come across shorter. I was thinking you were vertically challenged and that would explain your over inflated ego."

A rush of relief came over him as he saw Kali sit back down out of the corner of his eye.

"How does that make sense? Wouldn't I be insecure if I were short?"

"Napoleonic complex."

"See that right there is why you're fired," said Sam as he handed her a glass.

"I didn't even tell you what I wanted," she said examining her drink.

"Scotch neat right?"

"Yeah, how did you know that?" she asked with a slight smile.

"You mentioned it in our first session. I've got a good memory, well I did before…" For the most part he tried not to let his memory loss bother him, but still he didn't quite like how he had yet another weakness to overcome.

"What's up Sam?"

Kali removed her coat and settled back into the couch. She was wearing all black, tight jeans and a black t-shirt with the words "The Ramones" printed across the front in white block letters.

"What if I told you there was a way to get Quinn released from the state hospital," said Sam, taking a seat at the opposite end of the couch.

"Did you speak to the judge and get him to change his ruling?" Kali asked looking more interested.

"No. I tried, but at the last minute he changed his mind about seeing me."

"Well you can always try again, or find another judge," she said sounding sincerely disappointed that Sam's efforts had so far failed. Maybe she wanted Quinn released too.

"Blocked at every turn. The minute I mention Quinn's name doors slam and calls are disconnected. I know my father is behind this. He doesn't want Quinn released."

"Sam it may not be as simple as that. Quinn was facing some serious charges. The judge's ruling was not unjust given the circumstances."

"She didn't need to be sent upstate with the criminals." Nothing she could have done deserved that.

"You don't know the whole story."

"I know she left Beth on the dock and jumped into the river. Thankfully Puck was right there to save her and Beth."

"That's not…"

Sam stood up, stopping Kali mid sentence. "I know that Quinn wasn't herself mentally and that's the only reason she would do something like that. She was sick and she made a mistake. She doesn't need to be locked up for it." He walked over to the fireplace, turning his back on Kali.

He knew enough. His father had been extremely blunt. He wasn't going to listen to yet another person bad mouth Quinn because she made a mistake. The punishment clearly did not fit the crime. It was just his father's irrational hatred that had made Quinn suffer this way.

"So what's this about getting her released?"

Sam faced her again. "This is where I need your advice. Hypothetically speaking, say there might be a way I could get Quinn out free and clear, able to come home and return to her life."

"You do realize that even if Quinn were released she still would need professional help. She's still in treatment."

Sam wasn't living in a dream world. He did understand the gravity of Quinn's situation. That was the primary thing that was fueling his need to get her home. He wanted her close, where he could help her better.

"Of course. She'd still see you, but on an outpatient basis."

"I would be agreeable to that. Also Quinn being back doesn't change the fact that she can't be around Beth, that's a completely separate issue."

"I do realize that yes. Once she's home we can take care of that as well, just got to go one step at a time."

Sam wasn't quite sure why Quinn wasn't allowed to be around Beth. She tried to hurt herself, but she was in treatment, so why should her child be withheld from her? And Sam really wanted to know how Mercedes got to be the one taking care of her.

"So how would this hypothetical plan work?" asked Kali sipping her scotch.

"You have to promise not to breathe a word of this to anyone." His father probably wouldn't approve him telling any of this to Kali but he had to confide in someone. It all was weighing heavily on him.

"That's what the dollar's for right?"

"You gave it back to me."

"Oh right. Guess you'll just have to trust me. You might have been better off if you had just kept me on as your doctor was sure to never say a word then."

"I couldn't risk a paper trail, besides you keep pissing me off with that nasty attitude."

Kali flashed a grin. "Right back at ya."

"I can get Quinn released, have her home tonight, if I agree to the terms of the agreement."

"Whose agreement? What terms?"

"The who doesn't matter, but the terms, well that is why I needed to talk to you. See the thing is I would have to stay married."

She pulled one leg up under herself and turned toward Sam, giving him her full attention. "Okay. What's the problem with that?"

"I don't want to be married, at least not to my current wife."

"I see," she said rolling her eyes. "Thinking about swapping her out for the blonde?"

"No I'm not swapping her out. It's not like that. I just don't remember her. I don't have the necessary feelings for her to make a marriage work. Neither one of us deserves to be stuck in a loveless relationship."

Mercedes had a photo of him by her bed, in the room she used while at the house. Just him alone, taken at some point he couldn't recall. He'd caught her staring at it on more than one occasion, sometimes she even hugged it to her chest. It was too much, he needed her to let go, she was too young to be hanging onto ghosts from another life. Nine more months would only make things worse for Mercedes.

"I do see your point. Mercedes will be quite hurt by this."

"Yeah well she will be even more hurt in the long run if she holds on to an impossible relationship."

Mercedes was like a little girl with a crush, her sad puppy eyes following him around the room. Sam was guilty and sympathetic but he needed to remain unmoved. She just wasn't the person he wanted to be with.

"Yet in order to get Quinn released you have to remain in said impossible relationship?"

"Yes, and I'm not sure I can do it, to any of us."

"You could always keep pursuing other avenues or perhaps allow Quinn to remain in the hospital until she has completed treatment."

"How long will that be? From what I have surmised, the amount of time Quinn has to be at the hospital hasn't even been set yet. The judge was somehow just allowed to lock her away without any explanation or real cause." His dad must have had the judge in his pocket the whole time. A woman doesn't get sent upstate for a suicide attempt.

"He had cause. Her actions during her sentencing didn't help her at all."

"What happened in court?" This was the first he'd heard anything solid about her trial. What was she even in court for? Puck saved Quinn and Beth before anything bad happened.

"She got out of control, loud outbursts, went after Mercedes."

"Physically went after Mercedes?" Quinn had to have been provoked, Quinn wasn't the violent type.

"Yes. Mercedes was on the stand and Quinn went toward her in a menacing manner from what I have been told."

"So you weren't there?" No wonder it didn't make sense, probably wasn't even true.

"No I had an emergency and I couldn't be there that morning."

"Basically you believe hearsay?"

"There is video footage."

Sam made a mental note to get his hands on a copy of that video one day. He needed to see it all for himself.

"I can't believe Quinn would do something like that. It doesn't sound like her. I just don't know what I should do." A part of him feared that Kali was actually being honest. She really didn't have any reason to lie. What if Quinn's mental health was far worse than he realized?

"Sounds like to me you need more facts. Are you hesitant because of the marriage part or are you hesitant because you are not sure Quinn is ready to be out of the hospital?"

"The marriage part, obviously. I think Quinn will be fine, and there are plenty of doctors right here in Lima."

Even if he didn't admit it out loud, he was worried. Bringing Quinn home was supposed to help her, but if she were truly ill and not just caught in one of his father's traps, maybe she needed to be in the hospital. Maybe he was just being selfish by trying to bring her back to him before she was ready.

"How long would you have to remain married?"

"Nine months," he said hanging his head, the ring on the chain around his neck suddenly feeling very heavy.

"Interesting choice, exactly the same length of time you were in a coma."

Sam exhaled loudly. "Apparently being bound to the bed for all those months wasn't good enough. I now am being forced to be bound to a woman."

"In exchange Quinn gets her freedom, not too bad of a deal."

"Except the part where I have to be with my wife. It has to be a real marriage with her or Quinn will get shipped back."

Really married, in the same house, spend time together, seen in person, married. Sam knew his father would never let him get by with doing it half way. However, he refused to let his father paint him into a corner. It might take more time than he allotted but he would find a way to help Quinn on his own terms, even if that meant letting his father believe he was taking the deal to buy himself more time.

Kali shrugged before finishing off her drink. "I don't know what to tell you, either she's worth it to you or she's not."

"You're no help at all. Thank God I fired you." She didn't even deserve the dollar he'd offered her. All she did was sit there and question him, no suggestions or solutions at all.

"Sam you don't want advice, you want someone to tell you it is okay to use one woman to save another."

"What would you do if you were in my position?"

She smoothed down her straight black hair with her hand. "I'd stay in therapy for one, figure out why I have amnesia."

Sam shook his head. "Not hiring you back, so forget it."

"Someone else then. You have your own issues to deal with. Quinn is not the only one going through something right now. You are recuperating from a devastating illness, maybe now is not the right time to be making huge decisions, especially when you don't have all the facts."

Sam wanted facts and he planned on getting them, but somehow he knew that nothing he could ever learn would lessen his desire to help Quinn.

"This can't wait until I'm more adjusted. Quinn doesn't deserve to be punished this way. She's the mother of my child, one of my oldest friends, I've got to help her."

"Why don't you just go see her first, before you decide? Maybe coming face to face with her will help you with this dilemma."

Kali made a valid point. He did need to check on Quinn first before he decided on a course of action.

"I plan on it, in fact we are going up there tonight."

"We?" she asked.

"Yeah. You, me and…"

"Hey Sam, what's the big emergency?" asked Mike as he bounded into the living room.

"Right on time. My brother Mike, our wheels for this road trip," said Sam beckoning him closer.

Mike looked from Sam to Kali, a confused expression on his face. "Road trip? Figgins told me you were desperate to see me. I thought something was wrong."

"I did need to see you. I need you to take me upstate to see Quinn."

"No way I'm not going up there," he said backing away toward the door, shaking his head emphatically.

"Why not? Quinn's all alone in the hospital, the least we can do is go visit."

"Find someone else I'm not interested."

"You and Quinn always got along. Why wouldn't you want to see her?"

Something was off. Mike was the first to want to help a friend in need. Now he was acting like seeing Quinn was the last thing he'd ever do. Sam couldn't help but wonder if anyone had gone to see Quinn all this time. Maybe they all were treating her like an outcast because she had an affair with him.

"Don't drag me into your baby mama drama. I've got my own right here in town to deal with."

"It's just a visit. Kali is coming too."

"No I am not. Hi, I'm Dr. Kalina Hill as your incredibly rude brother failed to mention."

"Mike Chang," he said taking her hand. "You're his doctor right?"

"Not anymore," replied Kali.

"Don't tell me you deemed the man cured?" asked Mike looking a bit more incredulous than Sam liked.

"Nope he fired me and gave me a dollar."

"A dollar? Sam a woman as beautiful as this one deserves more than that."

Sam groaned internally at his brother's lame attempt at flirting. Mike seemed to gravitate toward the worst women. Put Mike in a room filled with women and without a doubt he'd end up with the bitchiest, most treacherous, bite the head off her lover after sex, type in the room.

"You don't want to go there man, she's related to Santana."

"Santana's my cousin," said Kali.

"Sam are you really going to judge her because of her relatives? Especially with the mother we have."

"Leave mom out of this."

"He's such a mama's boy," Mike whispered loudly to Kali, clearly wanting Sam to hear him.

Sam ignored Mike' taunts and went into the foyer to find Figgins. The man was there as if he had already anticipated Sam's needs.

"Your bag and your coat sir," said Figgins handing the items to Sam.

"Thank you Figgins."

"Oh I almost forgot. I picked these up for you. I hope they are to your liking." Figgins handed Sam a small narrow black leather case. Sam flipped it open, trying to hide his displeasure about what was inside.

"They'll do. It's only temporary right?"

"Yes sir. I'm sure everything will correct itself in time." Figgins turned and left Sam alone in the foyer, staring down at the open case in his hand.

He sighed heavily as he removed the glasses from the case and put them on his face. They felt heavy and awkward against his nose. He wasn't used to anything on his face, he never even wore sunglasses often, but his eyesight hadn't improved since he had awakened from his coma, and the doctors prescribed him glasses to help him focus. They claimed the blurred vision should be temporary, there was no evidence to prove that it was an injury from the accident, just a weakening of his eye muscles from lack of use.

Sam had sent Figgins to the store, to pick out his frames. Maybe he should have sucked it up and asked Mercedes to do it. She had to have made a better selection than this. Figgins clearly chose the ugliest frames in the store, black, thick plastic, squared shape. The kind of glasses the kids he used to tease wore, back in school. Must have been karmic justice for all his tormenting of others in his youth. He went back into the living room to get Kali and Mike, bag and coat in hand.

"Okay all set," announced Sam from the doorway.

"What's going on there Sam? Is it Halloween?" asked Mike pointing at Sam's face.

"They are temporary, my vision has been off."

"Perfectly natural after a long coma," added Kali. "I think they are sort of cute, in a dorky kind of way."

"Dorky? I've never been dorky in my life." He wanted to snatch the glasses from his face but he wasn't going to give Kali the satisfaction of knowing that her comment bothered him.

"Actually. I can remember you being pretty dorky when you were about in the 3rd grade. You used to dress up like a Power Ranger and wear the gear, weapons and all to school."

"I was eight." At the moment he wished Mike was the one with amnesia.

"And a huge dork. Did you know he would make us call him Green Ranger and not his real name? Wouldn't even respond if you called him Sam."

"That's so cute," said Kali smiling at Sam. "I can totally picture it. Little Sam in ninja gear fighting crime around the house."

"Power Rangers weren't ninjas they were teens that morphed into super powered elite fighters that worked with the Zords to combat evil robots and monsters that threatened the earth," said Sam. If they were going to mock, at least get it right.

Kali giggled. "I'm so sorry Mr. Green Ranger. I didn't mean to offend you."

"Those glasses are bringing out his dork side more and more the longer he wears them," said Mike as he plopped into a chair.

"Are you done? Can we go see Quinn now?" asked Sam becoming increasingly annoyed. He was the youngest in the room, yet clearly he was the most mature.

"He's rushing us to go see his damsel in distress. Is Lois waiting for you Clark?"

"He does sort of look like Clark Kent in those glasses. Very appropriate given the circumstances."

"What circumstances?" asked Mike.

"Sam knows what I am talking about." Kali shot Sam a knowing glance, but said nothing more on the topic.

"You call yourself a doctor? I need these glasses for my health. Why are you making fun of me?"

It was on now. Kali was on his list. Soon as he got the chance he was going to pump Santana for dirt on her cousin. He'd get her back for this.

"You are absolutely right. I shouldn't be teasing, the glasses look fine. Clark Kent was a dashing man, in his nicely tailored suits and dark glasses."

"And don't forget the tights," added Mike.

"Superman wore tights not Clark Kent," said Sam correcting him.

"The tights were under the suit remember? The whole changing in a phone booth thing. You're not going to make me find you a phone booth on the way up there are you? So you can change into your tights and cape before going in to see Quinn. Instead of an S on your chest you have a big E, in University of Tennessee colors."

"Instead of flying to stop his victims, he just throws beer bottles," said Kali breaking into laughter.

Mike joined in. "And yells out redneck exclamations with every heroic deed. Yee-haw!"

"I don't have time for this!" Sam yelled, throwing his bag and coat on the floor.

"Someone's getting cranky," Mike said to Kali.

"Maybe he needs a time out," Kali muttered back.

"Shall I ask Figgins to pack you a snack for our trip? Maybe he still has your Power Ranger lunchbox."

"Are ya'll done now? Let's go. I need to be there by 6," said Sam taking off his glasses and putting them in his pocket.

"You two have fun, tell Quinn I will be up to see her next week," said Kali gathering up her coat and bag.

Sam pulled her to the side. "I really need you to come, just in case I make a decision."

"I'm not holding your hand through this. I'm not completely on board."

"Come for Quinn then. Either way she might need you." He was pleading with her now, but he was desperate. She had to be there to sign Quinn's release papers if he decided to take his father's deal.

"I suppose you are right. You two have yet to talk about Beth that is something very major she needs to deal with."

Sam smiled as he picked up his bag. "I have many questions. Maybe you can fill me in on the ride up? How about it Mike?"

"What do I know? I've been living in Asia."

"Not the whole time. At least give me a basic rundown of key events."

"I guess I could do that," agreed Mike.

Kali made a face. "I don't think that's such a good idea."

"Why not? I'm trying to take back my life," said Sam.

"I can see that, and I think that's great, but I'm not going to risk you having another extremely emotional reaction in such an enclosed space."

"She's got a point bro. You do have a tendency to go nuclear."

"It was one bad reaction," said Sam. One small meltdown that his family wouldn't let go off.

"Actually it was more than one," Kali reminded him.

"That was when I was in the hospital. I was irritable because I was stuck inside. I'm mobile now. In fact, Mercedes and I just had a deep conversation a couple weeks ago. She told me some things and I handled it all fine."

"Maybe he's better Dr. Hill. He's got to find this stuff out at some time," said Mike as he helped Kali with her coat. Sam rolled his eyes at Mike' thinly veiled chivalry.

"It's Kali and he's not my patient anymore, so feel free to handle things as you see fit, but in my professional opinion, Sam needs to be introduced to his past carefully." She turned to Sam. "You claim to have taken whatever Mercedes told you well, but I'm not convinced."

"You don't even know what was said. How can you have an opinion on how I took it?" Psychic and a psychiatrist she needed her own talk show.

"I'm not a shrink, but I'm going to go with Kali on this one. What happened to this photo?" asked Mike picking up the framed picture on the mantle.

"It fell. The glass cracked," Sam replied casually.

"And this one?" asked Mike holding up another gold framed wedding picture with cracked glass.

"I don't know, maybe the servants broke it while dusting." Sam pulled on his coat, eager to leave the house, and the trivial discussion of photographs.

"Where are the other photos of you and Mercedes that used to be in this room?" asked Mike scanning the room.

"I've been in a coma. They probably redecorated. How should I know?" Sam headed into the foyer.

"They were here last time I stopped by," said Mike trailing him, Kali close behind.

"I don't have time for this. Can we please go?" asked Sam opening the front door.

"Yeah, Sam. We can go," said Mike quietly, giving him a strange look before he headed out the door.

(Quinn)

9:35 PM

"You're crying," said Sam as he entered the room. He reached in his pants pocket and dug out his handkerchief, handing it to her as he took a seat in the chair beside her. "Better than your sleeve."

"Thank you," Quinn said taking the handkerchief and wiping her face. "I've just been emotional today, actually for awhile now. It's not me, you know?"

"Yeah I know, but it is good to see you opening up a bit. You always kept so much inside. Well you used to."

Her newfound emotions weren't a good thing to her. Quinn missed her unreadable mask. It kept her in control, protected her from people that took tears as sign of weakness.

"That hadn't changed. I still liked to be in control of my emotions. The postpartum depression sort of made it harder for me to do that."

"I wish I could have been here for you. Maybe I …"

Sam looked away, but Quinn could see the pain on his face. It killed her that Sam was feeling guilty for events he never would have been able to prevent.

"There was nothing you could have done. I had to get help for myself, if only I had done it sooner."

That was something she'd never let herself off the hook for. She put Beth in jeopardy because of denial and her pride. Quinn had known something was wrong, from the first hours after she was born.

"Things got really bad then?" asked Sam grabbing her hand and interlacing his fingers with hers.

"Sam it was like I was standing outside myself, just looking in, appalled at what I was doing. It wasn't me. I didn't feel like me."

Quinn still had times like that, where her life seemed to be happening to someone else. Dr. Hill said it was her mind trying to defend itself, to shield the pain of taking full responsibility for her actions. According to the doctor the only way to cure it was to step into the moment and allow herself to feel it all again and deal with it this time.

"That's how it is sometimes when I hear things about the past three years. The things I supposedly did, they don't feel like me." Sam tensed as he spoke about his amnesia. Quinn guessed his mind was shielding itself from the pain of taking responsibility too.

"Looks like we have that in common," she said placing her other hand on top of his, hoping to soothe him.

He smiled at her. "I guess we do."

"It'll get better Sam."

"I know. I'm actually doing okay now. I'm just taking it as it comes. My brain doesn't seem to want me to remember, so I am not going to force it. Gotta move on right?"

"That's a great attitude. I wish I could just let things go and move on."

Although that sort of seemed like running away, Quinn really couldn't let go of what she did to Beth and to herself. She had to remember it all, keep it accessible in her mind, so she'd never do anything like that again.

"Maybe in time. You might not be ready yet."

She picked up the picture of Sam and Beth from the table, wanting to change to a more pleasant subject. "Tell me about Beth. She looks so big in this picture. Last time I saw her she could sit up on her own for a little bit. Is she crawling yet? Is she sleeping through the night? Getting any teeth? Making any sounds?"

"Whoa," Sam laughed. "That's a lot of questions."

"Sorry. I am just missing so much."

"I know. I missed it all too. Don't worry we'll catch up together," he said as he squeezed her hand.

Sam dragged his chair around to face hers, knees to knees, he leaned forward resting on the armrests of her chair, filling her space, making the cold room, warmer and more intimate.

"Here's what I know. I've only just begun to be with Beth for long periods of time. I was too weak before, so it's all new to me, but yes she can sit up on her own, she hasn't crawled that I have seen, she definitely doesn't sleep through the night, no teeth, but lots of drool so they are coming, and sounds...yes, actual words no." He grinned. "Did I cover everything?"

Quinn chuckled. "Yes you did, thank you."

"My pleasure. I wish I knew more. Mercedes probably could tell you stuff."

Tears were threatening to fall and Quinn had to bite her lip to keep them at bay. It was ridiculous to get so worked up over something that had been a reality almost since Beth was born. Mercedes was raising her baby, for better or worse.

"Mercedes has taken my place."

"Don't look at it like that." His hand fell to her thigh rubbing it gently as he watched her.

"I know I shouldn't. I am grateful that Beth has someone that loves her taking care of her, but I can't help but feel like she is getting all the time with Beth I should be having. It upsets me."

"Why did you let her keep her? Why not your parents?"

"It was an emergency. Either Beth was going into care or she could go home with Mercedes. My parents wouldn't have been able to get to Lima that fast, so I thought Mercedes was the right choice. And she was close to you. I knew she'd have you when you came back to us."

"You don't have to worry anymore, I'm here now. Mercedes has been bringing her over every day. She even stayed the night with me."

Mercedes had kept her word at least, Sam had been back in Beth's life since the time he woke up from his coma.

"So you're not staying at your house? At Coach B's?"

"No I am at the house with dad. That's my home."

Quinn was alarmed and relieved at once. A part of her was pleased Sam wasn't living with his wife. It was petty and wrong, but that was how she felt. She didn't want Mercedes to have so much of Sam, when she was stuck in here with nothing of him to hold onto but fading memories and dreams. The downside was if Sam lived at the mansion, then Beth would too. That didn't sit well with her at all.

"Will you be bringing Beth to live there with you full time?"

"I don't know. I haven't thought that far ahead yet. It seems like the logical choice, my child needs to be where I am."

Sam was right, Quinn knew it, and in fact she wanted it. The only source of peace she could take from this ordeal was that Beth had her father now. That was most important, not their living arrangements.

"Yeah but your father hates me. I'm not sure I want Beth in a house like that."

"Don't worry about my father," said Sam giving her thigh a reassuring squeeze.

"Sam you don't understand what it was like here while you were gone. Your father has it out for me. You just don't know…" Sam put his hand on her cheek, his touch instantly quieting her.

"Here's what I know. Beth has your eyes. I look at her and all I can think of is you and our history, and how we made this perfect like person together."

Their eyes locked and the room disappeared, leaving only the warmth of his hand on her face, the feel of his fingers rubbing her thigh, and those eyes, so green and open, making her feel things she had long thought dead.

"She has your smile, and your lips," Quinn said, her words getting caught in her throat. Sam smiled, his full lips, making her stomach flip.

"What else? Tell me something else about her." He moved closer to her, not removing either of his hands from their spots on her body.

"When she was born she was so tiny. She was premature. I had her in the woods."

"In the woods?" he asked moving his hand from her face to her hair.

"Well the side of the road. My car broken down and I called Mercedes to help me."

"Mercedes?" His eyes widened in surprise. "She was at Beth's birth?"

"She helped deliver her. I was driving to meet Puck and my car stalled and I started having contractions. I couldn't get through to Puck so I called Mercedes and she came out to where I was. She was new out of school, it was all textbook stuff for her, no real experience with childbirth, but she was better than nothing. Julian got there just at the end, in time to help with the cord and the rest."

"That's an incredible story. I can't believe I missed that."

The constant beat of her heart in her ears, he was so close, his aftershave surrounding her, his hand massaging the back of her scalp and those lips. He kept licking them, quickly sliding his tongue across them the closer he got.

"I didn't know she was yours then. I had a paternity test early on and we thought she was Puck's."

Quinn squirmed nervously, fearing she would just snap and grab him and kiss him, and probably scaring him off with such a forward display. Sam must have sensed her uneasiness, because he removed both his hands and leaned back in his seat.

"And you found out after she was born that the test was wrong?"

"Yeah there was some mix up, the results got input wrong. Something strange and rare that only happens in the movies. And suddenly I was the mother of your daughter."

"You must have been in shock. Probably disappointed because Puck wasn't her father."

"I wasn't."

"You weren't shocked by all of this?"

He deserved to know the truth. Taking a deep breath, gathering her strength, she began. "No I meant, I wasn't disappointed. I've just been able to admit this, after all this time, but I am glad she's yours. I wanted her to be yours."

"How can that be?" He shook his head in disbelief, running his hands through his hair. "You were engaged to another man."

"I know and I hate myself for being so selfish, for feeling like this, but I can't deny it anymore. I need you to know. Even after we had the paternity tests, I wished for the results to miraculously change somehow. I wanted Beth to be yours."

"Why Quinn?" He was trembling, but didn't look away, his eyes searching her face.

"I'm still trying to work all of that out in my mind. It just felt like it was meant to be, that she should be ours together."

"It feels like that to me too. It feels right. And so does this, us being here together," he said his eyes shining with emotion.

All the months of holding back, visiting him during off hours, sneaking around the hospital hoping Mercedes or Julian wouldn't see, pregnant and sad, longing just to hear his voice, see his smile, just once more. The pain of having to hide the depth of her feelings, from his family, his wife, Puck, even herself, keeping her emotions behind lock and key, ignoring the screams in the back of mind, silently yelling repeatedly that she loved him too.

Mercedes got to be with him, sit with him, stroke his hair, plant kisses on his unreceptive mouth and all Quinn could do was hold his hand in the dark, whisper to him about memories, old emotions, ones she prayed never would fade. Nine months without him and finally he was back, holding her so tight she could see fingerprints on her skin. It was completely wrong but she couldn't fight it anymore. She couldn't hide her heart, not when he kept looking at her like that. He'd come back to her and she was glad.

Both hands clasped behind her head, under her hair, fingers tipping her neck, he pulled her toward him, his eyes never leaving hers until they were so close his nose grazed hers. Soft lips pressed against her forehead, one cheek, and then the other. His hands sliding down her neck to her shoulders, down her arms to find her hands again, encasing them with his own. He was breathing heavily, his eyes on the floor, his hands squeezing hers tightly.

It was wrong and she didn't care. Quinn tilted up his chin, forcing him to look at her again. "I've missed you so much Sam."

Her eyes swimming with tears, and she still didn't care. Let him see her break, he was the only one that ever completely got behind her mask, through the cracks in her wall anyway. "I was so scared you wouldn't make it. I didn't think I'd ever get to see you again."

Then he gave her one look, his green eyes darkening with intensity and she was transported back to where this began, not her parents' porch, or moonlit summer nights, but to the Beacon, falling for the man he'd become, a man she wasn't supposed to want. She'd made so many mistakes in her life, great and small, but the biggest might have been not letting Sam know how incredible he was, how much he meant to her, how much she cherished him in her life. The coma gave it shape, and Beth made it real, solid, she always wanted this man in her life. Those thoughts consumed her as she slid her hand up his face to mingle with his hair, gently nudging him forward. She dared to go where his lips hadn't. The kiss she never could give him because he was not hers, longing to do it for months, and now, under bright lights and cold white walls, she took pleasure in his warmth and let her mouth cover his with her own. One simple kiss. It was little more than a caress actually, her lips gliding against his, over before it even began, as she settled back in her seat to watch his dimples deepen as he smiled at her.

"How could I not come back?" he asked in almost a whisper. Something in the air had changed, a current, almost tangible, settling between them. "You were calling my name, holding my hand. You know I never could resist you."

"Took you long enough," she teased, her heart feeling like it missed a beat as she watched his eyes light up. Sam was actually here, for real, not just in her dreams. Quinn couldn't stop smiling.

"I just needed to make sure you really meant it, that you really wanted me." Both hands on her thighs, dragging her closer between his open legs, one more inch and she would be off her seat.

"So you were testing me? Making me work for it? Is that what you're saying?" she asked letting her hand run up and down his arm.

"Pretty much, yeah."

"What am I going to do with you?" she asked as she playfully hit him on his chest. Sam caught her hand in his before she could move away, keeping it trapped against his heart.

"I have a few ideas, but first I was thinking dessert."

"Dessert? We don't have meals on demand here there are rules and set times."

"I was thinking dessert out of here, the two of us, and something sweet and delicious." He ran his tongue over his lower lip after he said the word 'delicious', making Quinn feel suddenly off balance. "How's that sound?"

"Like a dream. If only I could get out of this place for something sweet and delicious with you." She felt like she could melt, just knowing he wanted time alone with her.

"I'm thinking this dream should come true," said Sam, stroking her head softly before getting up and going to the door.

"Kali! Kali come here." Sam yelled out into the hall.

"What's wrong?" asked Kali when she appeared at the door a few seconds later.

"I need you do that thing we discussed," said Sam lowering his voice a bit. Quinn wasn't sure what was happening, they seemed to have some secret between them.

"Are you sure? I mean maybe you should take a bit more time, this is a big step."

"I've never been more sure of anything in my life," he said looking over at Quinn and smiling.

"There would be ground rules, and schedules -" Kali said pulling his attention back her way.

"Can you just do it? I don't care about the rest now," he snapped.

"That was incredibly rude. I was in the middle of talking."

"Do it now."

Quinn was taken aback by the way Sam was talking to the doctor, cutting her off and raising his voice.

"You need to learn the words 'please' and 'thank you'."

"Teach them to me in Spanish."

"That's offensive," said Kali crossing her arms.

"Kali," he sighed, rubbing his temple in annoyance.

"Fine, I'm going. Wait here Quinn," she said finally addressing Quinn. "I will be back in just a few minutes and then we can go."

"Go? What was she talking about Sam?" asked Quinn after Dr. Hill had left them alone again.

Sam walked over to her and took her in his arms, letting her hair fall through his fingers, before settling on the small of her back. "I'm thinking we should get out of here, spend some time alone. What do you say?" he asked smiling down at her.

"I can't just leave." Quinn said, confused and flustered. Sam was running his fingers up and down her spine, giving her tingles with each pass.

"Yes you can. Time to be free Quinn."

"Did you really find a way to get me released? I was hoping but I didn't think you did so…"

"I told you I'd never leave you," he said against her ear.

"I know but…"

"I'm keeping my promise," he said quietly, before placing his lips on her forehead, kissing her softly.

Quinn wrapped her arms around him, burying her face in the softness of his shirt, loving every bit of the feel of him against her body.

Real. Solid.

Sam had come to take her home.