A/N: Ok, here it is! The chapter I'm sure most of you have been waiting for! But don't get too excited, now. I'm evil laughing but you can't hear it. ENJOY.

December 7th – 6:07 p.m.

"It's here!"

Fin jumped and cursed when Carisi practically yelled at the desk across from him. He set his phone down and wheeled his chair around to him, meeting Amanda who'd just been coming out of the break room with a soda can in her hand.

"That was quick," she commented as she popped the tab to her can.

"Sawyer works fast."

Carisi quickly extracted the files sent via private e-mail, unloading them all onto his blank desktop. There was a total of four video files all together, each time stamped just like what was ordered.

"Here's the earliest one. The 3rd, around 3 p.m."

He clicked on the link and the video player took a second to buffer. Fin leaned forward as Amanda bent over the back of Carisi's chair, wanting to get a complete and full look at the screen. A stray thought to call for Liv passed through her mind, and she called for her through the open office door.

The video started, with a view of the car they'd been searching the city for pulling in and backing up close to the door. The three familiar figures got out quickly and moved to the trunk, popping it open and standing over it, effectively blocking the camera from seeing what was inside.

Just a few seconds of the grainy video passed before a familiar person was pulled out forcefully and stood on shaky legs. Barba didn't have the bandage on his arm and he looked less beat up than he did in the first recording of him they saw.

Amanda felt Liv approaching before seeing her first and heard the woman's breath catch in her throat at the sight of him on camera. They all stared at the video silently, watching the events unfold on the computer screen. The last image of the video ended as Barba disappeared down the steps of the basement.

There was a soft ping from Fin's computer and the detective pulled away from the group to check out the notification.

"Open the next one," Liv ordered, propping herself up on the side of his desk with her hands. Carisi followed orders, closing the window and opening the new video file quickly. They watched intently for a few seconds, seeing Lexi appear on the video during the night she mentioned in their meeting, before Fin broke their silence.

"Facial recognition had a few hits."

Carisi paused the video and they all migrated over to Fin, who was pulling the files up on his own computer. The first image struck Amanda like a lightning bolt, physically making her take a step back. Carisi, who'd been standing beside her, immediately looked at her, feeling and thinking the exact same thing as she was.

"Romero Salazar Hernandez, 32, multiple drug trafficking charges, served eight years and was released two years ago on parole."

Amanda let go of a breath she didn't realize she'd been holding, "When was the first video time stamped again?"

Fin and Liv looked at the two, just now noticing the drastic change in their demeanors.

Carisi gulped, "December 3rd, around three o'clock."

They stared silently at each other, silently trying to communicate but Liv broke their concentration, demanding to know just what they were doing. Amanda glanced at her boss, feeling the woman's eyes glaring at the both of them.

"What is going on?"

Liv's hardened voice sent a shiver down her spine and she crossed her arms and bit her lip, thankful when it was Carisi who quietly spoke out into the squad room.

"We…we talked to him."

Liv stood up fully, "When?"

"The same day as the first video," he said. He tried to look at Amanda, but her head was down and eyes concentrated on the floor. He could feel a crushing wave of guilt overcoming his entire body and he could tell Amanda did as well with every passing second.

"What time," Fin said, not asking because he realized what they were going to say before they said it and so did Liv.

"About thirty, forty minutes before the video took place."

Everyone went silent, not needing to point out the obvious. Liv huffed and turned, walking a few steps away from the desk and pressed a hand to her mouth, wanting to stop the angry words stuck in her throat from coming out. An odd sense of rage made her blood boil under her skin, but she was able to calm herself down seconds later.

She knew it wasn't their fault. The fact that Amanda and Carisi made contact with the very men who had Barba, stood feet away from where he was hidden and let them go wasn't on them. They had no way of knowing.

None of them would have.

"Liv, I- "

"Stop," Liv cut Amanda off, waving a hand in the air, "It's not anyone's fault. You couldn't have known."

Fin nodded, softly agreeing with Liv and effectively reassuring the two in front of him. Amanda nodded again and uncrossed her arms, standing a little taller at the Lieutenant's words. She expected to get yelled at, honestly, but she was glad she hadn't. However, the unbelieve amount of guilt both her and Carisi were feeling probably wasn't going to go away for a while.

"Let's look at the next one."

"Victor Maldonado. Face to a name. We got his rap sheet, but we don't have his," Fin flipped to a final picture of a young kid who didn't even have an updated mugshot.

"Ezekiel Sanchez, 14 when this picture was taken, but he'd be about 19 now. Misdemeanor grand theft…kid stole his grandma's minivan."

"We saw him, too. He came out of some brownstone and got in the back. Looked suspicious."

"And scared shitless of us," Amanda said right after Carisi's comment. Liv nodded, looking determined as she patted Fin's shoulder.

"APB's on all of them. I want SWAT knocking down all their doors in an hour or less. Carisi, I want to see the other two videos just to make sure we're not missing anything that could help us."

Carisi nodded and immediately went back to his desk.

"Amanda," Liv called to her and waved her over to the side for a second, "I want you to get a hold of Lexi and put her and her grandmother into protective custody."

"You think they'll need it?"

Liv nodded, swallowing a lump in her throat, "I know they'll need it."

Amanda nodded and pulled out her cell phone, heading off into Liv's office while pulling out her cell phone and unlocking it. Liv watched her go before she pulled up Amanda's chair and sat next to Carisi, nodding as he started the next video.

December 7th – 3:45 a.m.

Rafael was in serious pain.

More pain than he ever imagined he could be in, but he also felt utter elation at the glorious lights of the city he called home coming closer and closer into view. They were only a few miles away now, about to cross over the state line and back into New York and the only thing he could think about was getting to the 1-6 and out of this damn car.

He thought about directing the kid to the hospital, because the pain in his entire left arm was fucking unbearable, not to mention the rest of his body and his battered face. He could only imagine what he looked like. He knew what he felt like, grimy and dirty and bloody and so unlike himself.

Unlike himself in the external sense. Everything they did to him and put him through didn't break him on the inside like they wanted to do…tried to do. He fought tooth and nail against the little voices in his head and the extremely loud voices outside his head.

Yeah, he'd been scared. Terrified. His impending death scared him in every possible sense of the word. More than once did he spend those lonely, quiet hours in that basement writing out his own Last Will and Testament in his head. He had a list of regrets a mile long, ranging from that one time he lied to his mother about breaking her favorite flower vase when he was eight to the pent-up feelings for Olivia Benson he'd been carrying for years.

Being alone for hours at a time, with nothing but his thoughts to occupy the empty spaces in his mind, left him with time to think about what he hadn't accomplished in his life. It was depressing to think about, but he was resigned to his fate quickly.

Now…

Now he was watching in silence as they crossed over the bridge and into the city, the lights and somewhat empty streets at 4 a.m. bringing him a comfort he thought lost forever. He wasn't nervous anymore, even with Zeke driving per his directions.

Somewhere, in the back of his mind, when he first spoke to the young man, he knew that was his ticket out of there. Call it intuition or something else, but Rafael read him like a file. A deep-seated trust formed in between him and this kid through the unpleasant first conversation they shared in the warehouse.

As weird as it sounded, even in his own head, Rafael trusted this kid with his life, literally. They were driving through a city, in a known gang affiliated car and headed towards the 16th precinct. The likelihood that Zeke would be arrested upon their arrival was very high, especially if they saw the hat he'd put on his head halfway through their trip.

"Turn left," he croaked out, coughing into his right elbow. He gnashed his teeth at the sharp pain he felt when he did that and settled for fisting the material of his dirty slacks instead of groaning out in pain.

Zeke looked at him from the driver's seat, eyeing him skeptically as he turned at the green light. They were nearing the precinct, but he wasn't so sure they should have been headed there.

"We should probably take you to a hospital," the teen said out loud, keeping his eyes peeled for anything out of the ordinary. If he knew Victor, he had called in for back up and BX-9 would be crawling the city streets for them. The hospital wasn't the safest place for them to be and the precinct was, but Rafael's condition had started to decrease the longer he was awake.

His breathing was labored, he clutched his arm in pain from time to time, even though he was sure the lawyer thought he couldn't see it. He looked extremely pale, sweat beading his brow and wetting the dirty dress shirt collar around his neck.

"No. I need to see her. They need to know I'm still alive," he said, annoyance and anger slipping into his tone. He was starting to become irritated by the worried glances and suggestions, even if he knew the kid was considering his current health situation.

"Here, right here," Rafael all but shouted, pointing erratically as the pulled up on the side of the building. Zeke parked the car on a side street, right behind a line of cruisers. Anxiousness bubbled up in his stomach.

This was the end of the line for him.

As soon as they were in there, he'd be arrested and carted off to jail. Even if he had some sort of strange confidence in the man sitting next to him, maybe even his words wouldn't be enough to help his cause.

He'd played an integral part in his abduction and torture, no matter which way it was spun. It didn't matter if he was standing on the sidelines, trying not to throw up as they sliced his skin open or stapling his still bleeding arm shut…he was going down for this. Victor and Romero and those correctional officers wouldn't ever be found.

It wasn't like he could snitch. Snitches get stitches and in BX-9, it was more like snitches end up in the ground two days later.

Zeke had a moment of apprehension as he realized Rafael was out of the car and limping pathetically towards the side entrance of the precinct, using the wall to help him further along. Zeke had to give it to him. The man refused to give up.

He got out of the car and jogged up next to him, slipping his good arm over his shoulder and helping him up the stairs and through the door, into the lobby where a few officer's milled around silently.

This time in the morning, the precinct was unusually subdued for it being on 4 a.m.

Rafael felt a sigh of relief escaping his exhausted body and he felt finally safe within the walls of a building he visited almost daily. He recognized a few familiar faces, all staring at him now in shock and confusion. He smiled as a few of the uniforms came running over, crowding around him and asking him questions.

"Get a bus down here!"

"Mr. Barba, are you ok?"

"Someone get a hold of Lieutenant Benson!"

"Liv," Rafael felt the name slip off his tongue accompanied by a sudden wave of nausea, overcoming his senses and the sound of blood rushing in his ears drowned out everything else. His legs were turning to jelly right underneath him. Even with Zeke propping him up like a pathetic rag doll, he could feel his body giving up on him.

The next thing he saw was the ceiling of the precinct, the dizzying pattern of the light fixtures dancing in his vision as a few faces crowded over him. He could feel hands slapping at his face and the distant sound of a wailing siren growing closer and closer.

So many faces, so much talking. It was overwhelming him.

From his peripheral vision, he could see Zeke standing over an officer's shoulder, looking nervous and unsure of what to do. He wanted to reach out and reassure him, to tell him thank you and tell him not to worry. He looked so damn worried.

The edges of vision were fading to black, pulling him closer and closer into the land of oblivion, comforting him as he moved away from one reality and into another. There was a sudden, hazy movement that caught his eyes and he looked directly into a familiar pair of brown eyes.

They were so wide with concern and unshed tears, the frantic voice of Olivia Benson calling his name desperately, trying to break the barrier of his failing hearing. He could feel the corners of his mouth turning up into a smile and he whispered her name with the last of his strength before he succumbed to the comforting darkness.

December 7th – 3:59 a.m.

Liv rubbed her eyes and watched as the clock on her phone changed to 4 a.m.

SWAT did their jobs and knocked down doors with fresh search warrants, tearing their houses up from top to bottom to no avail. A few arrests were made for drugs, but no Barba and no suspects. Fin and Carisi had been on those trips and reported nothing suspicious found in the residence.

Of course, no one who lived there was talking just like they expected.

Amanda had gotten Lexi and her grandmother into protective custody and the two had left the city, back to Lexi's grandmother's home after a quick trip to her home to pack a few more things. Liv felt terrible for the girl, having lost her father and home all in the same day, but knowing the girl didn't real feel all that sad about the situation.

She didn't blame her.

Liv sighed and leaned back in her chair, looking out into the dimly lit squad room. Fin was napping in his chair, feet propped up with his jacket under his head as a pillow. Carisi was face down, head in his folded arms, also napping. Amanda was the only one still awake, munching sleepily on a bag of chips and an energy drink.

She had tried sending them home a few hours ago, knowing they were all exhausted from the past couple of days, but they refused. They knew how important time was in this situation and they were all determined to stay on in case they had a hit or something happened. Of course, their hope had dwindled from earlier.

Liv turned in her chair and looked out her window at the distant lights of the city, trying to take her mind off the image of Barba replaying through her mind in black and white.

He looked like hell. Beaten, bruised and bloodied. They'd tortured him, she knew it. The pool of blood and his cross thrown in the center of it like it was trash…it made her sick to her stomach thinking that he thought he wasn't going to live much longer.

Somewhere, in the back of her mind, she could hear a small voice, telling her to give up the hope she desperately clung to, telling her Rafael Barba was dead and gone forever.

She could see the headlines and news stories now, playing like a little made up movie in her own world. He could be six feet under right now, dead and buried without a second thought. Or maybe, he was floating down a river, corpse floating in the water waiting to be found behind someone's lake front property.

Liv let a few tears slip down her cheeks and she wiped at them furiously, feeling her heart clench painfully. She turned her chair, making sure she was completely facing away from the squad room and leaned her arms on the ledge of the window. She pressed her forehead against the cool glass, letting her tears flow freely while being keenly aware of any noise that would indicate someone walking into her office.

Fin had been the only one to see her cry or show concern and that was because he'd known her for so long it wasn't funny. Not that she didn't trust Amanda or Carisi, but she felt like she had to show strength for them to keep their motivations high. They were all distraught over this case and she needed to remain calm. If she lost her fight and broke down in front of them, everything was going to go downhill and that couldn't happen.

Not until they found him…

…alive or dead.

"Stop," she whispered to herself, voice thick and she sniffled discreetly, wiping at her nose. The tears stopped and she choked them down. She couldn't think like that, no matter how badly her mind was working against the empty optimism she was trying to feel.

She pulled her head away from the glass and wiped her eyes with her hands, knowing they were probably going to be red rimmed, alluding to the fact that she'd been crying, but there was no stopping it at that point.

She needed to be strong for them, but they knew she was hurting. They weren't so naïve to believe this wasn't a big deal for her.

That was another thing that Liv tried to ignore. The growing list of regrets and missed opportunities with Barba she'd never get to experience. She'd had a thing for him for a while now and it went far deeper than she'd ever dared to dream it would go. It made her incredibly sad that it took him being taken out from under her nose for her to realize those feelings for him and all she longed to do now was to see him again.

That's all she wanted.

She felt like it wasn't ever going to happen.

Especially now, nearing 4:05 a.m., she was really feeling it.

He'd been gone for five days now and the only evidence they had that he was still alive was officially 12 hours old.

A lot could happen in 12 hours. None of them were good or proved promising. Liv sighed and turned back around to face her desk, folding her arms over the printed-out mugshots and camera stills from the bugged house footage they'd received.

She glanced up as Amanda's phone desk rang and the blonde picked it up. Liv watched as the blonde's eyes grew wide and she shot up out of her chair, knocking it away from her and slamming it into the empty desk behind hers. It woke both Fin and Carisi, making them jump at the same time.

Liv sat up straighter as the blonde slammed the receiver down and tore into her office, talking and stuttering over her words, but she heard them clear as day.

"Barba's in the lobby!"

Liv sat still, looking at her like she'd grown a third head and not believing what she just heard. Both Fin and Carisi quickly moved in behind her, asking her to repeat herself. Amanda walked up to the desk and slammed her hand on the wood, knocking Liv completely out of her dazed confusion. She practically yelled in the woman's face.

"Barba is in the lobby!"

There was a half second of hesitation before they all jumped to action, Liv pushing past them out of the office and ran to the elevator, jamming her finger into the button harshly multiple times and forced the door closed quickly.

Amanda started repeating what the secretary told her over the phone after Carisi asked what was said over the phone, but Liv didn't hear any of it. Her stomach felt like it was in her throat and her heart was beating a mile a minute, threatening to slam right out of her chest.

The door dinged and opened quickly to a frenzy of activity. She could see a familiar pair of leather oxfords between a group of officers bent over a body on the floor. Liv briefly glanced at a kid, one of them from a mugshot they'd received but she didn't have time to really look at him.

"Move!"

Liv pushed her way in and fell to her knees, feeling tears threatening to fall again as she finally came face-to-face with Barba, but he was dazed and staring up at her with hazy vision. She looked at the bandage on his arm, soaked through completely with blood. His face was sweaty and pale and his breathing was labored, but he was alive.

"Barba! Rafael, stay with me!"

"Liv…," he whispered her name and passed out a moment later. She slapped him a couple times, unintentionally making contact with the nasty looking cuts and bruises on his face but he didn't wake. The only indication he was still alive was the rise and fall of his chest.

She placed her hand over his heart and kept one on the side of his face, refusing to take her eyes or hands off him. She hoped and prayed to God that this wasn't a dream. If it was, she didn't want to wake up.

"Hey, give him some space," Fin started barking at the group, pushing back the officer's crowding around them and wanting to give Liv and Barba some space. They would all need to clear out anyway as soon as the medics got inside. Amanda and Carisi stepped in to help as well, sending them off to write up an incident report on what they saw because they were going to need it later.

"Excuse me, miss?"

Amanda turned at the sound of a young voice behind her and stopped, instantly recognizing who he was, having come into contact with him just a few days ago. Carisi came up behind her, switching back and forth between the incoming medics towards Liv and Fin and the young kid.

"Ezekiel Sanchez?"

He looked shocked for a second and turned to see the paramedics rushing towards Barba, talking swiftly and working as fast as they could. Liv hovered near by with Fin, watching them assess his vital signs and conditions. Zeke turned back to them, locking eyes with Amanda and then Carisi.

"Yeah, that's me. I know you're going to arrest me, but I want to turn myself in."

Carisi and Amanda just nodded in understanding, not feeling the need to treat the kid like a hardened criminal. It didn't take a genius to figure out how Barba had made it back to the precinct, so they weren't going to throw him in a holding cell like garbage.

"You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say, can and will be used against you in a court of law…"

Carisi pulled out his cuffs and gently detained him as Amanda read him his rights, all eyes watching as the medics wheeled Barba out of the precinct on a gurney with Liv following, not bothering to give them orders as she left.