Chapter 32
Edward
By Bella's due date of 29th April, we were all desperate for Cub's appearance. Our baby was on the large side, and Bella had trouble walking even short distances without pelvic pain. She had managed to stay working in the lab until the end of March, but it had been a struggle, especially because she tried to do much of Irina's research workload as well as her own.
True to her word, Irina gave Seth an exclusive interview, anonymously, after Volturi and Demetri Kasparov's arrests, and persuaded two other members of the board to do the same. The interview formed Seth's fifth and final article, and was commended worldwide. The whole series was serialised worldwide, drawing the interest of the media for months. Seth was nominated for a global business journalism award as a result.
Irina took several months' sabbatical from her PhD to see Eclipse through the storm. She returned as soon as she and the board unanimously agreed on the appointment of a new CEO, which coincided with Harvard's spring break. Therefore, when Carlisle insisted that Bella start her maternity leave then, she didn't put up any argument.
Dr Santos, our OB/GYN, reassured us that everything was okay with the baby, but offered us a planned Caesarean section if Bella couldn't cope with the pregnancy any longer. Bella decided to stick to our original plan of natural birth though. Within a couple of days, however, her patience was wearing thin, as she could do very little without being exhausted or uncomfortable. We were getting to the point where we were seriously considering Dr Santos's offer.
Turns out, it wasn't necessary.
The phone call came early in the afternoon of the first of May. I had been talking to Randall and Nahuel following our successful research trial, and allocating work for them to write up. Both of them were working incredibly hard to cover the lab work left by MJ not being there, and I tried to make sure I didn't overload them.
"Hi, Bella?"
"Foxy, my contractions have started!"
She sounded a little breathless but she wasn't panicky.
"Cub's coming?"
"Yeah, the contractions are five minutes ... OWW, holy FUCK that hurts!" She started panting down the phone. "Make that four and a half minutes apart."
"I'm on my way, Baby!"
"No, by the time you come home to drive me, I could be half way to the hospital."
"So what do you want me to do?"
"Meet me at Brigham. Esme's here, she's going to take me. I have the bag."
Before I could ask, Esme took the phone from Bella.
"It's fine Edward. I just came to bring Bella some cookies when she started. Sarah's taken Jake and Nessie. We're good to go. Now, let Carlisle take you to Brigham, and we'll meet you there."
I had never been more grateful that Esme had Fridays off.
"Okay, meet you there," I repeated.
By the time Bella arrived, I had been pacing outside the maternity unit of Brigham and Women's Hospital for fifteen minutes. Carlisle had given up asking me to sit down and instead was making the phone calls I was too anxious to make.
"No, son, you don't have to come up tonight. Bella probably won't give birth until tomorrow... Can you let Tanya and Leah know ... okay, Bella's here, gotta go, love you Riley."
"Edward!"
She was in a wheelchair being pushed by an orderly, with Esme walking beside her, carrying the bag we'd prepared weeks ago. She had put on her smartest black maternity dress, but was flushed and sweaty.
"Bella."
I dropped a kiss on her brow and she smiled up at me.
"Cub's coming, Foxy," she whispered. "Have you seen Dr Santos? Her secretary said she was in surgery."
"The midwife said she's nearly done and will be coming straight over," answered Carlisle when I hesitated. I was so focussed on Bella that my mind had gone blank. "Your room should be ready now."
The next few hours passed by very slowly. Bella coped amazingly well with the pain in the beginning, and Dr Santos was happy with her progress, but by eleven o'clock that evening, she was exhausted.
"Bella, I know you wanted to do this without extra pain relief, but you're wiped out. You don't have to be stoic, Baby."
She looked torn, but another contraction made her mind up.
"Okay, let's ask the midwife when she comes in."
The midwife called Dr Santos, who came in with the anaesthesiologist around fifteen minutes later, and checked Bella over.
"Hmm ... you're eight centimetres dilated but your blood pressure is low, Bella. If we gave you a spinal or epidural, you would have to have IV fluids and a catheter, so we could accurately monitor your input and output, but even then, we might struggle to get on top of it."
"I'm quite reluctant to give you either, if I'm honest," said the anaesthesiologist. "I think you'll struggle with the drop in BP and headaches after the birth. However, if you insist, I'll do it."
"I suspect that you'll be delivering within two at the most," Dr Santos added helpfully, but Bella glared at both of them.
"Are there any alternatives?" I enquired.
"We could move you to the hydro room. You might find it easier in water. And you can still have Entonox."
"Let's do that," Bella replied.
Bella did feel better in the hydro-pool, although it didn't take away her pain. Cub seemed to understand that his presence was urgently awaited, thankfully and just an hour later, surrounded by warm water, Bella was told to push.
She screamed and screamed, but never once did she do that thing you see women doing on TV where they curse and swear at their husbands. Instead, she held tightly onto my arms as I surrounded her from behind, while Dr Santos and the midwife prepared to catch Cub.
"Okay, the head is out, Bella. You're doing real well. Now take a deep breath and one more big push, and your baby will be here."
"So tired," she murmured, her cheeks damp with tears.
"Just one more big push, Baby, and Cub's going to be in your arms. Our arms."
I pressed my lips to her temple and sniffed back my own tears as she gripped my arms once more and started to groan with the pain.
"That's it, push, push, push, push ... that's it ... keep going ..." coaxed the midwife. "That's it, that's it!"
A moment later, Dr Santos lifted a very wet, wriggly bundle from the water.
We had a son.
The second the doctor placed him in Bella's arms, he opened his eyes and began to yell his tiny head off.
"Shh, shh, my boy, Mummy's here." She cradled him in her arms as she turned to me, beaming. "Foxy, you're crying."
"Yeah." It took me almost a full minute to choke out what I wanted to say. "I-I love you b-both."
"I think Daddy's a bit overwhelmed."
I didn't answer Dr Santos as I reached to stroke my son's head. He quietened momentarily and when I placed my finger in his hand, he gripped it tightly. I knew it was a reflex but it felt as though he knew I was his father and that we loved him unconditionally.
Wrapped up in a snow-white babygrow and a fluffy blue blanket a few hours later, happily milk drunk from his first feed, our son was introduced to the first of his visitors, Tanya, Leah, Emily, Riley, Esme and Carlisle. I called Charlie too, and he was taking the first flight out from Santiago.
"Oh, Bella, honey, he's adorable!" Riley squawked.
"Shh ... no loudness around the sleeping baby," Bella replied. "First new rule of the Masen household."
"What are you going to call him?" asked Emily.
"Edward and I decided to wait until we saw him before making a final decision but he suits our favourite choice ... Edward Oliver Masen."
"I love it," murmured Esme, beaming. "But won't it get confusing having two Edwards?"
"No, we're going to call him Ollie for short until he's old enough to decide whether he prefers a derivative of Edward."
"Every first-born Masen son for four generations was Edward, so we wanted to continue that tradition." I explained. "My father was Edward Christopher; he was called Chris by family and close friends, and Edward by colleagues."
"Sounds like a good compromise," agreed Carlisle.
"May I hold him?" asked Riley. "I promise I'll be careful ... And quiet."
"Okay ... Make sure you hold his head."
Bella carefully passed Ollie to Riley who was ever-so-gentle as he took him from her arms.
"Hi there little guy. I'm Riley. I'm gonna be like your best uncle, but don't you dare call me 'Uncle,' okay? When you're with me, I'll show you how to make your world more stylish and beautiful."
"You're not his uncle, Riley." Riley looked up sharply at Bella's words, instantly hurt. "Sorry, you're not just his uncle, I should say. You're his godfather."
"W-what? No, really?" Bella and I smiled at each other, and Carlisle and Esme before nodding. "Surely you mean Mom and Dad, or Tanya?"
"We want Ollie to have someone he can turn to when he's struggling with the complexities of modern living. We discussed it with Carlisle and Esme and they agree. You are that person. Nobody is more in the modern world than you. Tanya's going to be a godmother too, as well as his favourite auntie, and you are going to be his godfather."
All eyes strayed to Tanya, who nodded enthusiastically.
"By the time the kid's ready for the fun stuff I'll be too wrinkly, but you won't be," she reasoned. "Leah and I are starting to think about kids of our own."
Riley swallowed hard and wiped his eye with one purple, glittery polished finger.
"I won't let you down, little guy. And just for kicks, you can call me 'God-daddy Riley' if you want."
"Is Tanya going to be Ollie's only godmother?" asked Emily in a small, hopeful voice.
"Oh, Em, you haven't been superseded, I proimise," Bella murmured back. "There is nobody I trust more to guide our son. From you I hope he will learn patience, kindness and the satisfaction of personal achievement."
"Thank you."
"Here you go, Godmama." Riley passed Ollie over to Emily, who kissed his brow as she took him into her arms."
"Hello, gorgeous boy," she murmured. "Welcome to the world." She looked up at Bella and me. "You are so lucky to have such love around you."
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Bella
Motherhood was far more challenging than anything I'd faced academically or personally. The sleepless nights and constant demands of a helpless little baby meant that I was constantly ratty. It often took all day for me to find the time to get dressed and Jake and Nessie were lucky if they got a five minute walk. When The Fox arrived home, I'd practically throw Cub at him and have a shower. Our one-year wedding anniversary was celebrated with a cupcake and a kiss while we tried to soothe Ollie through a bout of colic.
Thankfully, it didn't last forever, and the first time Ollie smiled at me, it made it all worthwhile. His eyes became green, and his full, thick hair was a dark brown, closer to my hair colour than Edward's, but it had a red tint to it in the sun. He was chubby, with pink rounded cheeks and a cherubic upturned nose, and his grin was slightly crooked just like his father. When he was upset, his eyes would grow large as saucers before he started wailing.
By the end of July, when Cub was almost three months old, my father came to visit for a few days in between contracts. Ollie was mostly sleeping through the night, and we had a much more manageable routine. Jake and Nessie, who were wary of him when he first arrived, had become used to him quickly and were very protective. They even learnt to take his dirty nappy from me and put it in the pail when I was changing him.
"Who's the handsomest boy in the land, eh?" cooed Charlie, rocking Ollie gently as we sat in the back garden, drinking iced tea on his last evening in Boston. "That's right, Ollie, it's you!"
He was rewarded by a gentle smile from his grandson.
"So the next contract's in South Africa?" I had deliberately avoided asking him about work for the duration of his visit, and waited for him to bring up my mother. Apart from telling me she was fine, he hadn't spoken about her at all.
"Yes. It starts in early October in Johannesburg. I'm going back to London to catch up with things in the central office, and maybe play golf with some university chums if there's time. Then I'll go to the main house for a couple of weeks," he said, referring to the Swan family country house in Wiltshire, my childhood home.
"Sounds good," I replied inanely. "And you'll be out there until the New Year?"
"I'm hoping to wrap it up by mid-December. If it's all right with you ..." He looked at me sheepishly. "... I'd like to spend Christmas here."
"Of course, Dad, but what about Mum?" My curiosity overcame me.
Charlie's shoulders moved upwards and tensed as he took in a deep breath. He passed Ollie over to me.
"Bella, this past year, it's become apparent that your mother and I have started to want different things from life. I'm sixty now, and I feel my age. I don't want to spend all my time in offices, on oil rigs or in hotels anymore."
"But she's not ready to give it up?"
"She isn't, not at all. We've been a double act for many years, but we're both capable of brokering deals alone, and so I've decided to retire. The South Africa deal will be my last one."
"What does this mean for you and Mum?" I asked, although deep down, I already knew the answer.
"We're going to divorce, my darling girl."
"Is that what you want?"
"I will always love Renee, complicated, infuriating woman that she is, but she won't change, and I have," he sighed. "She already has my replacement lined up. They're going on holiday to the Bahamas until we start in South Africa."
"What? She's with someone else?"
"Yes. She thinks I don't know, but she and our lead executive assistant have become very close."
"What, Philip? That dweeb?"
Finally, Charlie cracked a smile
"My sentiments exactly, Bella, but she wants someone who will compromise for her and not the other way around."
"Well, he'll certainly do that. He's quite the ass-kisser," I replied. "Where will you live? What will you do?"
"I'm selling my share of the company and the London townhouse to your mother as part of the divorce settlement, and I'm keeping Swan House," he explained, referring to our family seat in Wiltshire. "I'm going to live there, but I thought about having an apartment or holiday home here in Massachusetts, so I can come visit regularly and see my grandchild grow up."
"Really?"
"I missed out on most of your childhood. It may not be much consolation for you, but I don't want to miss out on my grandson's," he murmured. "If that's okay with you," he added uncertainly.
"It's absolutely okay with me," I told him. "Look, I am well supported and loved, and so is Ollie. Without you, we will be okay. We'll survive, we'll live." I leaned over and took his hand. "But with you in our lives, we will be great. And we will live happy."
"That's ... That's good to know." He sat in silence for a moment, before suddenly standing up. "Hug for your old man?"
"You don't have to ask." I stood up too, and let him wrap his arms around me and Ollie, who had fallen asleep against my shoulder.
Jake and Nessie suddenly ran past us to the garden gate, to greet The Fox, who was returning home from work.
"Hey, pups." He hugged and petted them and they returned to the other end of the garden. Edward then came over to the table and kissed me and Ollie on the forehead. "Everything okay?" he asked as he spotted us both looking emotional.
"Yes. Dad is retiring and he and Mum are divorcing."
"And that's a good thing?"
"It's the right thing, Edward, it's the right thing," Charlie replied, clapping his hand on Edward's shoulder. "Did you have a good day?"
The Fox took Ollie from me and kissed our son's chubby cheeks before taking a seat next to me and helping himself to some iced tea.
"Okay, thanks, although I've had some bad news."
"What's wrong?" I asked.
"It's John Gerandy. He had another heart attack. He's in a coma now."
"Oh no, I'm so sorry, Foxy. What a tragedy."
"I worked with him for nearly eighteen years. He taught me so much," Edward murmured sadly, curling an arm around me while Ollie cuddled against his chest.
Charlie's mobile beeped with a text, breaking up the sadness that had suddenly filled the atmosphere.
"My car to the airport is here. I'm going to have to go."
"Okay, Dad. Safe journey to Jo-burg and we'll Skype in a couple of weeks or so."
"Great. Edward, I know you'll take care of my darling girl and grandson." He shook The Fox's hand. "I'm sorry about your mentor."
"Thanks Charlie. Look after yourself. Sorry about you and Renee."
"Don't be. It's for the best."
After my father left, we took Ollie inside and put him in his basket so he could sleep, while Jake and Nessie watched over him diligently.
"Talk to me, Foxy."
"John's going to die, Baby. There's no hope. They think maybe a day or two at the most."
"Who told you?"
"Jasper. He emailed me this afternoon."
"What do you want to do?"
"I'd like to go to any memorial organised, but I don't want to leave you. Nor do I want you to feel obligated to go when Ollie's this young."
In my mind, there was no question that we would be going to Oxford to pay our respects when the time came. Edward wouldn't be where he was today without Professor Gerandy, and indirectly, he was responsible for our relationship and family together.
"Of course we're going, Edward."
"But Volturi might turn up, and Banner will be there."
"None of that matters, Foxy. He was your mentor. You will regret not paying your respects. We can always talk to Jenks about security while we're there if you're worried about the threat."
"We would see Jasper and Alice, Emmett and Rosalie. We could also go to the cabin in Scotland for a few days."
"Sounds like a good plan."
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John Gerandy died the next morning. Jasper confirmed that the funeral and the memorial service would be two weeks later.
We booked flights to England straight away, and talked to Jenks; Jared and Paula would be joining us. Carlisle and Esme, who both knew John Gerandy well, came with us. After the memorial, they were returning home straight away, but we were going to spend a long weekend in Oxford, catching up with our friends there, before heading up to Scotland for a week to stay in Edward's cabin.
Ollie did not cope well with flying. He was miserable from the moment we took off to the moment we landed. The time difference also messed up his routine and by the day of the funeral, none of us had slept more than a couple of hours.
"Shh, baby boy, shh my little Cub."
Edward was pacing up and down the serviced holiday apartment we'd rented (Emmett and Rosalie had sold their house in Jericho so we couldn't stay there). He was trying to placate our son for what felt like the hundredth time since we arrived. Ollie was quiet for a minute before bawling again.
"I don't think we can take him to the funeral like this. Even the memorial service and the wake are looking shaky."
"Yeah ..."
Edward looked disappointed.
"Why don't you come with Carlisle and me," suggested Esme. She and Carlisle had also rented a holiday apartment in the same building. "Jared can take us while Paula stays with Bella and the baby."
"On our way to the memorial after the service, you can pop in to see Bella and Ollie, Edward," added Carlisle. "If Ollie's settled, they might be able to join you for the rest of the day."
"Bella, what do you think?"
"I agree. I don't think there's any other option, Foxy."
"I guess not."
Edward, Carlisle and Esme left with Jared a few minutes later, and Ollie became near inconsolable without his daddy. Eventually though, probably through sheer exhaustion, he accepted his dummy and fell asleep in my arms. I gingerly put him in his car cot and he stayed that way. He was still sleeping when The Fox came back an hour and a half later.
"How was it?"
"As good as can be expected, I suppose. There was a big turnout at the church. John was from a big Irish family, and then there were loads of his old students and colleagues."
"Did Carlisle and Esme go ahead to the memorial?"
"Yes. It's not starting for another hour, and it's a nice day, so they decided to walk via a cafe."
"Did Volturi or Banner turn up?
"Doug was there, as was Luis Molina, but I didn't see Volturi. I'm sure they saw me but I didn't make eye contact." He glanced over Ollie, still fast asleep. "Should we risk bringing him?"
"If I may suggest," began Paula. "We have parking permits for the college car park, so if you sit near the door, you can come out to the car easily to feed him, or change him, as the need arises."
"That's a good idea."
The memorial was very touching. Several of John Gerandy's classmates, and even his undergraduate supervisor, who was in his nineties, had come along. Edward gave a short speech about his experiences of working with his mentor, and how inspiring he was.
Ollie stayed asleep until about five minutes before the end, when he started to quietly snuffle and fuss. I stepped out with Paula as quietly as I could manage, although I knew I'd drawn some attention. He settled as soon as I fed and changed him, by the time Edward and Jared came out to check on us, he was asleep again.
"Maybe the jetlag is wearing off," The Fox said as he stroked Ollie's downy head.
"God, I hope so."
"Is it okay if we stay a little longer, to pay our respects to John's family?"
"Of course."
Edward put on the baby carrier, which cradled Ollie to his chest, and our little boy barely stirred as we moved him over. We spent the next forty-five minutes or so at the wake. We spoke to the late professor's widow Maggie, who despite her grief, welcomed us warmly and told us that she was delighted that Edward had finally 'settled down.'
The Fox introduced me to an array of his former colleagues and students, all friends of his I'd never had the chance to meet before we left Oxford. Carlisle and Esme also introduced me to neuroscientist colleagues who had come from all over the world to give the late professor a good send-off. I was apprehensive about meeting so many new people as Edward's wife, and being judged for our age difference. However, they accepted me warmly, and congratulated us on our marriage and Ollie's birth.
That evening, The Fox and I were invited to join Carlisle, Esme and the other neuroscientists for drinks and dinner at The Eagle and Child. Ollie and I joined them for a drink, but he woke up and became increasingly fussy. Therefore I decided to take him back to the apartment with Paula, while Edward remained, with Jared staying in the bar nearby. To be honest, I was glad to leave; although I enjoyed getting to know the eminent neuroscientists, it was tough being in the place where MJ had threatened my life, and Ollie's.
Paula was polite, but she was trained to observe and keep her distance, so didn't interact very much with me. When she looked at Ollie though, her features softened and she tried not to smile, so I knew she had a heart.
Ollie was still a little subdued, but he was smiling when I gave him his bath, and settled quickly after having his night-time feed. After putting him in the cot to sleep, I made pasta for me and Paula, who tried to refuse the meal at first, but wolfed it down appreciatively when I insisted. I then curled up on the sofa, and watched TV, which felt like utter luxury.
I was still relaxed when Edward returned with Jared.
"Hey, how did the evening go?"
"Good," he murmured, sliding onto the sofa next to me. "I missed you though."
"I hope they didn't think me terribly rude for leaving."
"Not at all. Nearly all of them have kids, so they understood." He tilted my face towards him and kissed me gently. "How's our boy?"
"He's great. He had a lovely bath and then dropped off straight after his milk." I showed him the video baby monitor.
"Wonderful. Sorry I wasn't there to help you."
"You were where you needed to be." I slid into his lap and wrapped my arm around his neck. "How are you?"
"Okay. You were right to insist we came. I have closure and I know I'm going to continue John's work."
"Do you miss Oxford, Foxy? Should we have come back when Volturi was fired and they offered you his job?"
Oxford University formally dismissed Volturi from his position as Head of Neurosciences a month after the criminal charges were filed. They had come under intense scrutiny when the media interest hit, and faced difficult questions about his recruitment, especially when it emerged that Jasper, Emmett and Edward had quit as a result of his appointment.
"No, even though Doug Banner and Luis Molina have taken 'early retirement' ..."
"What a joke. They got off lightly."
"Totally, Baby," he agreed. "But we're established at Harvard. Being here has just cemented that in my mind. No, it was best that Jasper took the reins."
When Oxford offered the Head of Neurosciences post to one or all of Edward, Emmett and Jasper, we discussed it between ourselves and agreed that we didn't want to move back. I was glad that The Fox didn't regret our choice, because I was far happier in Boston. Emmett too, preferred his new position in London, working with Siobhan Macleod; Rosalie had been made partner in her law firm, and their boys loved London life too.
Jasper, however, missed working in Oxford, and although he loved being in Siobhan's lab, he wanted more management responsibilities. Alice had not been looking forward to moving to London either, and so he put himself forward for the Head position, alone. Oxford, with the department in chaos and with a reputation to rebuild, agreed so readily that he was able to negotiate his salary and benefits.
"Yes, he seems to have made a good start. Angela told me that things became much more organised when he returned."
"It's a shame you couldn't meet up with her. Typical that our week here coincided with the Microbiology World Congress." Ben was presenting his research at the conference in Athens, and Angela had gone with him.
"Yeah, she's desperate to meet Ollie. I think she's keen to have one of her own."
"Best thing we ever did," Edward sighed, "was to become parents."
I glanced at the video baby monitor once again. Ollie turned his head slightly, still in dreamland.
"I couldn't agree more," I whispered back.
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Thank you for all your reviews and support. Just two chapters and an epilogue left after this! The next update should be within two weeks.
British baby-speak:
*Babygrow= bodysuit/onesie
*Nappy= diaper
*Dummy= pacifier