a/n: This was actually really fun to write, so I hope you enjoy it! Don't forget to drop a review on the way out!

"Oh, stop being so dramatic. Don't be such a prude, Evans, be a man."-James

Chapter Four: The Boys' Bathroom

James raised his eyebrows in amusement. This should be interesting. He knew Lily would be freaking out, which is why he decided to have some fun.

"Just go, then," he said calmly.

Lily scowled at him and began to rock slightly in her seat. "It's not that simple, Potter," she snapped.

"Sure it is," reasoned James, stifling a snicker. "All you have to do is pull down your pants and—"

"That's not what I mean! How am I supposed to go?"

"Well you're a boy now, so you'll just have to go the manly way."

"I'll do nothing of the sort," she said briskly. "Potter, I have no desire whatsoever to see a your—I mean, a boy's—" Lily stammered to a stop, blushing furiously.

James grinned at her and crossed his arms. "Continue," he said.

"—bathroom," she finished lamely.

James chuckled softly."You know, most girls in this school would be just dying to see a boy's bathroom. If I were you, I would use the present situation to your advantage." James paused and looked thoughtful. "You know what, scratch that. Just...never mind."

Lily pulled a face and scooted her chair from him. "Potter," she told him. "I am not most girls, and I am not going to use the boy's bathroom."

"Well, you can't just hold it all day!"

"I'll hold it all week if I have to," she said. "I'll hold it until I'm back in my own body."

"Ha!" James barked. "Don't hold your breath. Or your pee, for that matter."

Lily bit her lip and tried to cross her legs. Then she shifted again and crossed her feet. Nothing was working. As much as she hated to admit it, James was right. She couldn't hold it all day. In fact, she would be lucky enough to make it to the next hour.

"Just go if you're that uncomfortable," said James as he watched her squirm. "I honestly don't care, and you probably have more discomfort holding it than you could if you just bite the bullet."

"No," Lily said stubbornly. "I'm fine."

"Sure, you are," he said. He looked to her bouncing leg, and shook his head skeptically.

"I am!"

James reached for a nearby watering can and slowly poured it over a plant, making sure Lily saw the water splash over the leaves and soil. "How 'bout now?" he said, grinning evilly at her. "Still calm?"

Lily eyed it carefully and shifted in her seat, bringing her legs closer together.

"Yes," she said, trying to sound confident.

But James caught that note of panic rising in her voice. "You, know, I'm really not convinced you are." He upended the can a little more, increasing the speed of the water rushing through the spout.

"I'm fine," Lily said tensely. Her set her palms flat down onto the chair and curled her fingers underneath.

James set the can down and squeezed her on the side, just underneath the rib. He knew was his own most ticklish spot, and sure enough, Lily jolted and and winced through an involuntary snort of laughter.

But she was definitely far from amused. She slapped his hand away, finally fed up with James trying to provoke her. "I'M O-BLOODY-KAY!" she shouted angrily.

Complete silence followed and Lily realized that every head in the room was turned her way. James quickly buried his head in his arms to muffle the laughter that was erupting from his mouth. Lily, thoroughly mortified, drew a shaky breath and slid lower in her seat as Professor Oaks stared at her.

"Mr. Potter," the woman said sternly. "Is there something wrong?"

"No professor," Lily mumbled, wishing she could disappear on the spot.

"Then tell me, what is the answer to the question?"

Lily grimaced and racked her brain to try and remember what Professor Oaks had been saying while she was talking to James. "Um…leaves?" she said weakly. Clearly her guess was wrong, because it was drawing laughter from those around her.

"Leaves," repeated Oaks stonily. "You think that leaves are one of the main types of wood that is used to make your wands? Well I must say, I have never heard an ingredient such as that. Ten points from Gryffindor, Mr. Potter. Five for your inappropriate outburst and five for not paying attention."

The snickers quickly morphed into a collective groan from the rest of the Gryffindors once they realized they were sharing Lily's punishment.

"Sorry," she muttered.

Professor Oaks returned to her lesson, calling on a Hufflepuff to give answer what Lily could not. "Thanks a lot, Potter," she said angrily under her breath.

James brought his head out of his arms, wiping the tears of laughing from his eyes. "I was just concerned for your well-being," he said. He had mirthall over his face. "No need to get emotional."

X

X

Lily sighed and sat down at the Gryffindor table for lunch, exhausted. She had been holding her bladder ever since Herbology and it was becoming more and more difficult by the moment. She couldn't keep still and was constantly moving around in her seat. James had continued to bug her about giving in, but she simply refused to. She knew that she would have to go eventually, but she wanted to think of an alternative way before she did. So far, nothing came up.

"James, are you okay?" asked Kate as she shoveled food into her mouth. L

ily looked at her and tried to stop rocking back and forth. "Uh-huh," she said quickly. "I'm okay, I just have…"

"Bladder issues," finished James.

Lily glared at him and served herself some chicken. "No I don't, I just don't feel like myself today."

"Huh," said Parker. "I think Lily's feeling the same way."

Lily looked at her sharply. "Why do you say that?" she asked, somewhat worriedly. "What did she do?"

"It's more like what she said," said Kate, giving James a look.

Lily slowly looked at him and James looked down at his plate, becoming very occupied with his vegetables. "What did she say?" Lily asked wearily, her eyes never leaving James.

"Well," said Parker. "Where should we start?"

"How about the part where Lily told Professor Veronique that she should be able to tell her where she had been when she walked in late?"

Lily's eyes widened in horror. "You were late?" she asked James.

He looked at her and gave her a guilty smile. "Just a bit," he said lightly, bringing his index finger and thumb about a millimeter apart.

"Then there was the part where she started to clip her nails, and told her that she had studied her anus. I mean, Uranus," she corrected hastily.

Lily made a cry of outrage, but couldn't say anything more than that. James nodded slightly and prepared himself in case he had to do some fast running.

"Oh and that's not the best part," said Parker.

"There's more?" Lily said faintly.

"Oh yeah," said Kate. "Then, she started saying how much she hated divination along with a few other things about Professor Veronique, and it turned out she was right behind her the entire time. Lily got kicked out class and given a detention."

"WHAT!" Lily was no longer speechless, leering at James across the table.

"Did I forget to mention that?" he asked delicately. "What is the matter with you?" she hissed. "You got detention? Again? Plus you got kicked-?! No, you know what? Come outside with me. I need to talk to you. Right now."

James took a bite of his potatoes. "Does it have to be right this second? I'm eating."

Lily grabbed his wrist and tugged, forcing him to shuffle off the bench. "So take it to go," she emphasized icily.

Even though he was unable to pull his arm away from Lily, James stealthily managed to sling his bag over his shoulder and grab a brownie as she dragged him away. On his way out he dropped a wink toward the others, who were left staring after them in confusion.

"Is it me," said Peter, breaking the silence. "Or is there something very odd going on?"

"No," Remus said slowly. "There is definitely something wrong. Lily's suddenly doesn't give a wit about anything. And James...well, I haven't seen him this tightly wound in a long time."

"What do you think is going on?" Sirius asked as he helped himself to chocolate pudding. "I mean, it's really weird. They're still arguing but everything seems kind of backwards"

"Kind of like they've switched personalities," laughed Kate.

"They're probably just feeling a bit…off," reasoned Parker. "James is probably feeling under pressure or something."

"And Lily's probably got PMS," added Remus, laughing along with Sirius and Peter.

Parker and Kate exchanged angry looks. "Why is it that whenever a girl shows emotion, guys relate it to PMS?" asked Parker.

"You know, just because boys can't express their emotions doesn't mean that we overreact when we're expressing ours," Kate said heatedly.

"Yes it does," the boys said in unison.

X

X

James was leaning against a desk in a classroom, looking extremely bored, while he watched Lily pace back and forth. He knew this situation was inevitable as soon as he realized he was in Lily's body. He expected to be blamed in her tirades off and on throughout the day, and as such, it was much easier to handle.

"First, you make us switch bodies. Then, you ruin the date with someone who I have liked for months. Now, you land me in detention and get me kicked out of class! Were you born to make my life hell?" Lily was breathing heavily trying to calm herself down, but being smack in the middle of a rant is not usually conducive to regaining peace. "I mean really, why can't you just be reasonable and make things easier for me?"

"Where's the fun in that?" James asked, remaining calm against her accusations. He held up his brownie, smirking at her because he knew it would infuriate her more than if he had yelled back. The juxtaposing act of kindness in the face of her fury only emphasized that he wasn't listening. "Brownie?"

True to prediction, Lily clenched her teeth and strode up to him, grabbed the brownie and hurled it at the wall, making it splatter and leave a nasty stain.

James looked at it for second, then back at Lily. "You know," he said, not losing his smile. "You've got a great arm, Evans. Ever think of trying out for the Quidditch team? I'd bet you'd make a great beater."

Lily scowled at him and grabbed his collar, pulling him close to her. "I'm about to become an excellent beater, Potter, using your head for practice!"

"Whooaah." James delicately peeled out of her grip. "I think we are all under a little of stress here. Take nice, slow, breaths Evans. It will help with your anger, I swear. Think cheery thoughts."

"Like your head on a plate?" she said coldly.

"I was thinking more along the lines of flowers," he continued happily, much to her annoyance. "Pretty sunsets, happy faces, fresh baked cookies…me, minus the decapitation aspect," he added haughtily.

"Would you shut up?" Lily snapped irritably. "Good Godric, llisten to yourself." She sat down in a chair and shifted uncomfortably. "I still haven't solved my problem yet," she grumbled. "I have to go really bad."

"So go, then," James said for the millionth time. Lily rolled her eyes, concentrating too hard on holding her bladder to yell at him.

"It isn't that easy!" she said. "You should be protesting rather then telling me to go."

James shrugged his shoulders and chuckled. "Why? I've got nothing to hide."

Lily's eyes widened and she sputtered angrily. "Oh, stop that! It's starting to annoy me. Really, Potter, I'm serious. I need to do something to solve this problem. I tried to go to Dumbledore but he wasn't in his office all day." She paused, considering what she was about to say next. Oh who cares, she thought. I'm desperate. "I need your help. Please?" she added in a small voice.

"Oh, I don't know," James said casually. "I find this all quite amusing. Why stop the fun now?"

"Can't I just do it the normal way?" she said, ignoring his comment. "You know, sit down?"

James crossed his arms and leaned lazily against the wall. "I mean, I guess, you could. Not at all my preference, but it could work. You'll be seeing an eyeful either way. And don't think you won't have to aim, just because you're seated."

"But why?" she whined childishly.

"Do you really want me to answer that?"

Lily huffed and rose to her feet again. "Alright," she said heavily. "I think I thought of something. I'll just…go and you modify my memory each time, okay? You know, so I'll forget everything about it except that I went, alright?"

James rolled his eyes. "Bloody hell, I don't have time for that! Why can't you do it?" he added stubbornly. "You know how I am at charms."

"I can't modify my own memory Potter," Lily reminded, condescending to him. "If you paid attention in Charms once in a while you would know. I'll just have to…" She gave a slight shudder and pulled a face. "…trust you."

"Alright, then." James waved his hand dismissively. "Just remember, this was your idea entirely. I don't want to be blamed for any of the negative outcomes, and it will not be my responsibility when I erase everything in your memory that goes back to age five."

Lily was quiet for a moment as she contemplated her choices. She crossed her ankles a few times before rolling her eyes. "Oh, screw it, I'll just have to take that chance." She jumped to her feet and headed out the door, and James purposely dallied behind her. Lily rolled her eyes again and grabbed his wrist, pulling him to the bathroom."Just come on!"

They hurried along the corridor until Lily stopped him before the girls' bathroom. Before she could run in, James grabbed the back of her sweater, restraining her from moving forward.

"What do you think you're doing?" he demanded.

Lily sighed. "I thought we covered this, Potter. I. Am going. To. The. Bathroom," she said, as if speaking to a toddler. "Now that we've cleared up that bit of information, I'll be right back." She started to open the door, but James jerked her back again. "What now?" she said exasperatedly.

"Are you crazy?" he whispered. "You can't go in there! I'm a boy! You're a boy! What would it look like if you walked into the girls' bathroom in my body?"

Lily's face changed from anger to horror. "You mean, I have to actually go in the boys' bathroom?" she said in a hushed voice. "Gross!"

James sighed and shook his head. "Look, if you're going to take a piss in a manly way, you might as well go all the way and do it in the boys' bathroom."

Lily groaned and looked at the door of the boys' bathroom. James watched her as she thought about her situation. It was clear that she couldn't hold it any longer, and he knew that it was only a matter of time before she gave in.

"Oh, fine," she moaned.

James smirked at her and gave her a supportive pat on the back. "The sooner you go in, the sooner it will be done."

Lily turned on her heel to face the entrance of the bathroom and took a deep breath, as if preparing to go into battle on the front line. "Alright," she said apprehensively. "Here I go."

But her feet didn't move.

She screwed up her eyes and took a small step, then another. James sighed and rolled his eyes. At the rate she was walking, it would take her just a century to get in there, and another one to get out.

"Oh, stop being so dramatic," he said briskly. "Don't be such a prude, Evans, and be a man." He walked behind Lily and gave her a strong push straight into the dreaded room. Lily gave a frightened squeal as the door opened and she disappeared behind it. As the door closed, he heard her yell, "POTTER, I WASN'T READY, YET!"

James just laughed as he slid down against the wall and drew a textbook from his bag. Knowing Lily, it was going to be a long wait.