Chapter 38
Pacing behind the white leather couch where Kurt sat playing a video game with his good friend Elliot, Mercedes was tempted to pull her hair out. Sam had infuriated her to the point she was ready to unleash her wrath on him, let him hear every word she had been mentally calling him since she saw him in that photo with Quinn. She wanted to let him know that he wasn't dealing with some sorority sister like he seemed to think. He couldn't just use her at his whim and toss her aside when his crazed mistress made a comeback and he definitely couldn't try to inflict his will, in front a journalist no less, and expect her to meekly comply. Mercedes had tried to be nice, keep it gentle since he had recently come out of a coma, but he was pushing the limits of her patience. He didn't control her, no one did. She had spent her whole life being dominated by men and now that she was free from her mom and her associates, she wasn't going to be put in that position again.
Sam had some nerve to demand she spend time with him tonight, as if she wanted to be his distraction as he moped about Quinn and her drama du jour. And to just throw it out there that he wanted to work on their marriage like an accusation, like she had somehow prevented them from doing that thus far, like she was the one that made him go upstate instead of bringing his butt home to actually spend time with her, was such a load of bull, and so typical Sam. She wanted to smack him for being so arrogant and so insolent and so much like the man she fell in love with. Insanity was knocking at her door as she flipped from wanting to hit him and wanting to kiss him, unable to settle on one action or the other. No she wanted to hit him more, definitely. After weeks of silence and disdain he decides he wants to know her now, and she's supposed to drop everything and jump in his arms grateful, all while ignoring that Quinn is somewhere in the house. Screw that and screw him. If that was the outcome he was hoping to get, he was in for a very disappointing evening.
Mercedes had tracked Kurt down to the game room, set up with multiple big screen televisions, a pool table, darts, and assorted board games, it was the oasis away from the hustle of the party. Decorated in the same cool blues and whites as the rest of the event, it was equipped with all of Sam's favorite games, since Kurt anticipated Sam would be more comfortable in here than out on the dance floor. Sam wasn't big on dancing unless it was slow and leading to something more intimate. Not that Mercedes had any experience with Sam's party behavior. Their time together hadn't included much socializing, aside from a few corporate dinners, a hospital benefit, and one engagement party for his high school friend. Nevertheless, Mercedes knew Kurt was right to create this space for Sam and others to enjoy, where they could hear the music but not have to dance to it. Somehow the room had yet to be opened to guests, but Kurt and Elliott had managed to make themselves at home there.
"Are you even listening to me?" she asked shaking Kurt's head with her hand.
"Of course I am," Kurt answered ducking out of her reach. "Sam's being an ass."
"No I said he grabbed my ass!"
"He married that ass. Shouldn't he be allowed to touch it?" Elliott snickered from the recliner a few feet away, not so engrossed in the game to overhear Kurt's crack. Mercedes smacked Kurt hard on the arm. "Ow!" he squealed, rubbing at his arm, but still managing to continue playing his game.
"I can't believe you just said that."
"I think you're overreacting. I say take this attention as a positive and go with it."
"This is not positive." She flopped down on the couch beside Kurt. "Sam is up to something." Mercedes knew Sam wasn't being straight with her, he had that look in his eyes. The one he often got when he was close to making a business deal at work.
"You said he wanted this to be your first date," he said without looking in her direction. "That was probably his way of creating some romance."
"Kurt can you quit that stupid game and talk to me?" asked Mercedes raising her voice above the boyish whoops and hollers of Elliott and Kurt.
"I can whip Elliott at Super Smash Bros Brawl and talk to you at the same time," replied Kurt his full attention on the television screen.
"In your dreams you're beating me," said Elliott with an excited smile on his face.
"Kurt I need you to focus. If Sam's trying to romance me then it is an act, especially since he brought Quinn back."
She waved her hand in front of his face to get his attention. Kurt stretched his neck, raising his head higher to see the screen over her hand.
"The score is right on the screen. It cannot be denied." He boasted to Elliott. Glancing quickly at Mercedes he said, "Quinn's still locked up it was just one night at the hotel."
"Mental patients don't get to check themselves out for a night of passion."
She was such an idiot for not figuring that out sooner. Of course Quinn had been released permanently, late night excursions were not part of the recovery process for mental patients.
"Evans money talks, besides Sam told me it was just one night."
"Sam told you? Are you saying you knew about the hotel before that picture came out?"
"Better give up now Mr. Starchild," said Kurt rising to his feet as he pressed the buttons on the game controller rapidly. "Victory is mine." He grinned. "Hey!" Kurt yelled as he stared at the suddenly dark screen. "Cede, what the hell?"
"I'm trying to get your attention." She crossed her legs and relaxed into the couch, unmoved by Elliott and Kurt's outrage. Mercedes was tired of their games, she had serious issues on her mind, like a cheating spouse and a crazy lady on the loose.
Kurt dropped his controller on the table before pushing the hair out of his eyes. "But hitting the reset button mid game is not cool."
"I think in some countries you could be imprisoned for that." Elliott chimed in, looking just as displeased as Kurt.
"Do you know which ones so I can send her there?" Kurt asked Elliott while throwing Mercedes a threatening look.
"Elliott, I think I hear your Ipod skipping." Mercedes said flatly.
Elliott stood up and paused, listening closely to the music that was muted in their video game area. "Sounds fine to me."
"Are you sure? Because Justin Beiber's "Baby" just played twice." Mercedes had no clue about the music, she was barely listening, but she knew that any mention of music being misplayed would send Kurt's friend running.
Elliott looked horrified, his dark brown hair almost looking a shade lighter from the shock. "Justin Beiber? That's not on the playlist. I only have that on my ipod for when I babysit my little sister," he said as he rushed from the room.
"He's totally lying about Beiber you know," Kurt said laughing lightly after Elliott left the room. "Elliott secretly loves him." He picked up his drink from the coffee table before returning to his seat beside Mercedes.
"So he's a Belieber, and you read Twilight, there are bigger offenses being committed here tonight."
"Yeah I think Sam's Manilow obsession is far worse."
"He's not obsessed," she stopped, looking over at him. "How did you know about that?"
"Overheard you say it to him once when he was in coma, promised to play him 'Mandy' if he woke up. That's why I knew the 'Oh Mandees' would be perfect, even with Blaine in the band."
"Wow that's pretty cool of you Kurt." Mercedes smiled. "I thought it was just because of Blaine that you suggested the band, but the fact that you did that for Sam and for me." She hugged him around his shoulder. "Wow." Mercedes stopped mid hug and pushed Kurt roughly back against the couch. "Wait a minute! I'm mad at you! You knew about Sam and Quinn being together last night and you didn't bother to tell me?"
"Oh whoa! Stop right there and wipe that look off your face." Kurt held up his finger to keep her from pouncing. "I only found out earlier tonight. Mike called and assumed I knew. You know I don't keep things from you."
"This you did."
"Sam asked me not to say anything," Kurt explained. "He practically begged. He said he wanted to be the one that told you about this. He swore it was just last night and nothing more."
"I get it bros before hoes right? I knew you guys liked to stick together but I thought it was different with us, that we had a special bond that went beyond all that guy code crap."
"Mercedes! He's my cousin. I don't agree with what he did at all, and I told him that, but he promised he was going to tell you."
"Guess what? Sam lied. I walked into the nursery and I found him in Quinn's arms."
Finding out Sam had cheated on her had been bad enough, the shock, the humiliation, the creeping sense of betrayal that discolored everything she believed was special and unique about them, destroying their intimate bond making her doubt every word he ever uttered. That was the worst kind of pain. It had torn through her physically and shattered her esteem and self-worth, but she had recovered, picking herself up and duct taping herself back together to become the mostly whole person she was today.
Seeing Quinn with her arms around Sam, possessively, lovingly, as if she belonged there brought all that pain back up again, and this time it was so much worse, because the evidence of his infidelity was tangible, on display for her naked eyes. This time she couldn't blame an overactive imagination or vengeful exaggeration when she pictured the two of them, now she had visible proof of how they were together, and it was awful. Worse than when she had to sit back and watch him date Rachel, because at least then she knew that Sam felt something for her too, she could cling to that attraction they shared and hope for something more down the line. Now she didn't even have that. He didn't know her, and whatever attraction he felt toward her clearly wasn't enough to combat his feelings for Quinn.
"Quinn's here?" Kurt asked, his voice going an octave higher.
"Yep, in a slutty red dress, probably sucking up all the free drinks she can get her hands on."
How Quinn managed to always look flawless was one of life's great mysteries. Quinn had been just as wrecked as Mercedes over Sam's collapse, on the floor with him, wiping his blood stained face, but to look at Quinn you would never know it. She looked like she just stepped off the runway.
"Here in this house?" Kurt's eyes were like saucers, as if he heard Bigfoot was spotted in Lima instead of Quinn.
"Yes Kurt! Sam had Quinn released last night, not just for one night, for good."
"This party just hit the big leagues," said Kurt looking excited by the idea. He was always looking for something juicy to happen in their little city. "I bet those media vultures are just gearing up to swoop on her."
"Doesn't seem like many people know she's here. Surprisingly she's been keeping a low profile." Though still visible enough to interrupt her private conversation with Sam, Quinn must have a homing beacon that sounds whenever Sam is in the vicinity.
"How are you handling this party crasher?" asked Kurt offering her his drink. She must look worse than she thought if Kurt was trying to liquor her up.
"Not like I handled Rachel if that's what you're worried about. I'm trying my best to ignore her, which is not a simple feat, with Sam looking longingly for her in the crowd right in front of my face." Mercedes took a sip from his glass, frowning when she tasted the scotch. She handed him back his glass.
Hiding emotions was something Sam could never do well with her, she always was able to read him, even when he tried to block her out. After their little moment that Quinn witnessed, Sam's whole demeanor had changed. He was distracted and lost in his thoughts. Mercedes knew he was upset about Quinn seeing them together. He had looked like a cheating spouse caught with his pants down when Quinn entered the lounge area. Mercedes never thought it would be possible to feel like the other woman in her own marriage, yet here she was almost feeling like Sam's dirty little secret. When no one was around Sam was very interested, hands everywhere, throwing around flirtations, but once there were witnesses he backed off looking guilty for being caught anywhere near her.
"Why don't you have her put out?" Kurt suggested. "Daley and the guys can be discreet."
The thought had crossed her mind more than once, but something Sue had said kept her from following through. While Sam was passed out, Sue had said Sam wanted Quinn there, like it or not. If Sam wanted Quinn at his party, who was she to stand in the way of that?
"I'm not going to let her ruin Sam's party any more than she already has. So no scenes or public outbursts, I'm the picture of decorum tonight. I even told Sam he was free to go spend his time with her and forget this date nonsense."
A part of her had really meant it. If Quinn was the one he wanted Sam should have her. They all learned the hard lesson that life was too short to waste. If she were more of an unselfish person she would simply walk away and let him be happy with whomever he chose. The thing was she didn't think he would be happy with Quinn. All Mercedes saw was him heading toward disaster and heartbreak and the part of her that always was weak for Sam, caring when he didn't deserve it, or want it, and she couldn't let him end up hurting again. She couldn't believe that he was brought back from a coma just to be flatlined by a succubus like Quinn Fabray.
Maybe she wasn't the best woman for him, Mercedes knew she hadn't been the perfect wife, with that message, and secret feelings for another man, but one thing she was sure of, every part of her loved Sam. It might not count for much with him, but it was all she had to offer and she had to believe that someday he'd see that and let her in his life and his heart again. That couldn't happen if she just left and gave him up to Quinn. She had to stick it out and remain a presence in his life. If only he didn't make it so damn difficult. Why did he have to be such a jerk? His attitude made it so hard for her to want to stay.
"Uh huh." He gave her a look as he sipped his drink.
"What? You don't think I can be civil?"
"Civil maybe, civil while your husband is hanging out with Quinn Fabray? No way. Rachel gave me her version of what went down between the two of you earlier."
"Meaning she lied to you." Rachel put on her sweet and innocent act for the rest of the world, but behind closed doors she was a total bitch. Mercedes couldn't understand how Kurt could live with her.
"She said you threw the first punch."
"She called Sam a pedophile."
"Even still you started a fight right in the middle of the foyer with guests in the house."
"Someone disrespects my husband or my family I'm coming after them. I don't care where I am, but I'm not worried about Quinn. She wouldn't say anything against Sam. She's in love. Told me so earlier tonight."
Getting shot probably would have hurt less than hearing Quinn admit she loved Sam. Mercedes had suspected as much, watching her actions while Sam was in a coma, Quinn's clandestine visits, her constant concern, and her silent accusations, calling Mercedes out for breaking Sam's heart and putting him in a coma. Hearing the words though made it all the more real, Quinn loved him and Mercedes knew Sam loved her, the only one left unloved was her. Stomach bubbling guilt threatened to make her ill again as Mercedes tried to ignore the little voice within that urged her to step aside and let Sam and Quinn be happy. Sam had told her in the car accident that Quinn's love was the one thing he always wanted and never got, looked like his dreams had come true, and the only thing in his way was his marriage. Truths that large were hard to ignore.
"And that tidbit made you want to push Sam in her direction? What are you apprenticing as a yenta?"
"Don't you have to be Jewish to be a yenta?"
"Mercedes what's going on with you?" His voice softened and he put on his concerned face. Mercedes braced herself for a lecture. Kurt always began his words of wisdom this way. "Usually you would be in tears or throwing elbows but never Ms. Decorum."
"Okay but you have to promise to keep this to yourself." He shifted to face her fully, leaning back against the arm of the couch.
"I think I've proven that I am good at keeping the lips zipped."
"I have a plan."
"Thank God," he said, literally turning his eyes upward in exaggerated reverence. "I was starting to worry about you, thought you were turning into a zombie. So what's the plan?"
"For now I'm playing it cautious. I'm trying to sniff out what Sam's up to."
Specifics were never her thing when it came to Sam, no point since he had this knack for being unpredictable and keeping her on her toes. They had that in common, being able to improvise and think on their feet. All she could do was rely on her instincts and try to stay one step ahead of him.
"How can you do that if you sent him to be with Quinn?"
"That was a test. If he sticks with me tonight, instead of hanging with Quinn, I will be able to figure out what's going on."
"But he's not with you. Where is he?"
"I don't really know. He walked away from me. He got all huffy and started acting out in front of that reporter when I tried to end our date."
This whole wanting to spend time with her and asking for a chance was suspicious to Mercedes from the start. Sam couldn't be bothered to know her before, why now did he suddenly need to? And why did he need her to believe that he wanted to make their marriage work? He had been so adamant earlier, actually seemed offended that she didn't believe him. The intensity of his reactions alone made her wary. There had been nothing passionate between the two of them since the hospital when he thought she was just his nurse, once he found out she was really his wife all that cooled. Now he was desperate to be with her? Something was up, and she needed to find out what.
"Isn't that a sign right there that he's serious about spending time with you?"
"He's serious about something, but I doubt it has anything to do with me."
"Mercedes I think you might be selling yourself short. I can tell Sam feels something for you."
"He tried to convince me of that earlier, a little too hard. He's playing me."
In his bedroom he made her want to believe. He was saying all the right things, admitting his denial, apologizing for his mistreatment of her. It was everything she had hoped to hear, so perfect, and that was the problem. It was too perfect, nothing every panned out the way Mercedes wanted, so none of what Sam was saying could possibly be real. His arms around her, his lips on her skin, his eyes finally looking only at her, she'd trap that moment in a bottle if she could, to pull out and enjoy whenever the loneliness became unbearable or the thought of him with Quinn too much to take. For that small stretch of time, he was hers again, and she didn't want to let it go. But she had to in order to get to the truth, to find out what Sam was truly after. Letting herself get swept up in his pretty words and heartfelt declarations would only end up causing more pain.
"I don't know. When I talked to him before, he seemed pretty genuine." Kurt's hopeless romantic side was rearing its head again. Mercedes wished she could steal some of his faith in the positive, but life had kicked her too many times to trust in dreams, all she could rely on were solid facts.
"Sam is an adept liar. He could sell sand in the desert, bull shitting is one of his natural talents."
Kurt smirked. "Here I thought you liked the guy."
"I do like him. I don't have a problem with his scheming abilities, except when he uses them on me."
"So what's your next move?"
"If our supposed date actually happens I'm going to beat him at his own game." She smiled imagining Sam at the end of his rope, thoroughly frustrated by her. It would be a nice little payback for all the stress he had caused her today with his Quinn surprise. "He wants to dazzle me, well I'd like to see him pull that off when I'm acting like the date from hell. I will be blocking his every move."
"Sam has a reputation for having a way with the ladies, especially when he taps into that Evans charm. You think you really can resist him? It has been months since you've seen him in action, all of this time together is going to get to you."
"I am finding it quite easy to shut him out. I think seeing Quinn all over him cooled some of my affection."
The thought of them together made her stomach turn, not exactly an aphrodisiac. Mercedes felt confident she could keep a clear head, she had done fairly well so far, that kiss was a momentary lapse easily blamed on too much amaretto. Now that she had her course of action planned out she would no longer be tempted by his lips or his eyes or that smile, all she saw now when she looked at him was a blank face with a bullseye painted on it.
"I'm not buying that. Sam says the right word and you will be totally sucked in. You love him way too much to ignore him."
"Just watch…" She stopped talking, cocking her head to listen closely. "Do you hear that?"
Over the collective hum of music and conversation she heard shouts. The words were muffled, but the differentiation of sound was unmistakable.
"Yeah it sounds like yelling."
Mercedes got up and went to the entry of the room, sticking her head out into the main party area. Again above the noise she heard shouting.
"It's Sam. He sounds upset."
"Maybe someone made a crack about his hair," joked Kurt getting up from the couch to join Mercedes at the door.
This time his voice was clear, distressed and angry, calling Quinn's name at the top of his lungs. Mercedes' stomach lurched as she wondered what could possibly have Sam so upset.
"Kurt I'm serious. Do you hear him? He's going to black out again if he doesn't watch it."
Taking Kurt by the hand she dragged him out of the game room and into the crowded party toward to the sound of Sam's voice.