A/n: Omg, I am so sorry! I blame it completely on writers block, junior year, and all the other busy-ness that has been in my life. I had no intention to leave you guys hanging for six months. So, for that, I apologize. Also, thanks to every single person that reviewed (OVER 1000!!!!). It really cheered me up, because I had a death in my family and it was someone really close to me, so thank you for all of you wonderful comments. Okay, here's the deal. This is actually half of Chapter 14. I decided to split it in 2 rather than making readers wait another month (most likely longer, knowing me), something to sustain you for a little longer. ;) I hope you like it. Personally I don't think this is the best one. I needed a few filler scenes to keep from making the chapter jumpy. Gimme your feedback!

Chapter Fourteen: A Night Apart, Part I

After the group had parted ways, Lily insisted on taking a long shower before heading into Hogsmeade to wash off the sweaty, grimy feeling that the Quidditch game had left her. Nearly an hour later she, Sirius, and Remus wandered their way around Hogsmeade, each armed with a pouch filled with sickles, knuts, and a few gallions. "Man, I'm starving!" Sirius declared loudly. He threw his arms around Remus and Lily's shoulders. "I think we should head to The Three Broomsticks for lunch first. What say you, lads?"

"Sounds great," Lily agreed. Now that the thrill of the Quidditch game was subsiding, the consequences of going without a good breakfast were hitting her hard. Nothing sounded more inviting than a good meal.

"And after that, we can head over to Zonko's," Sirius said.

"Followed by some time in Honeydukes," added Remus with a grin on his face.

"And then we can go back," Lily finished. This was met with noisy protests from both companions.

"Go back?!" Sirius exclaimed, scandalized. "What the hell d'you mean by 'go back'? Surely not while we're still sober."

"C'mon, James, what's your hurry?" Remus asked. "It's not like we've got anything better to do."

"We have homework," Lily said. "Plus that really long—"

"Like the man said, Prongs," Sirius interrupted, smiling wryly. "We have nothing better to do."

Remus laughed and clapped a hand on Lily's shoulder. "Relax, Prongs, we'll have plenty of time to finish everything by Monday morning. Somehow, you and Sirius manage to do it every weekend. C'mon, loosen up! If this is about how you played earlier, just forget about it. You pulled through in the end." Lily sighed and looked at the two boys at her side. Why not? I'm allowed to have some reckless fun every now and then. "Well, what are you standing there for?" she asked, grinning at Sirius and Remus. "Hurry up, let's go eat." With that said Lily made her way to The Three Broomsticks, deciding to forget all responsibilities she had for the rest of the day.

Back at the school in the kitchens, James did not have that luxury. Shortly after he and Lily had parted ways, he made up his mind to get a bit of his homework done while he ate. Presently, he was frowning deeply as he worked his way through a particularly tough Potions essay on the history of the heathstone. As it had to be the length of two and a half sheets of parchment, James was doing the two things that earned him such good grades on essays: 1.) make the sentences as long and as wordy as possible, and 2.) write large.

So far, he had about half a page to go. James placed the tip of his quill between his teeth and ran a hand through is hair. "Bloody hell," he sighed. "C'mon, a little more." He took a large bite from his pancakes and chewed thoughtfully as he searched through his textbook.

"The heathstone is known as rare and unusual, mainly because of the way it is formed. One can only be created when the hairs of a unicorn are shed and fall among a patch of shale herbs. The magical properties of both are at their highest at night, but the hair loses a significant amount of power after being separated from the unicorn for twelve hours. It must rain during those twelve hours for the properties of the hair and shale herbs to blend, thus forming the heathstone."

James snapped his book shut and hastily wrote the information down, making his sentences long enough that it filled up that space left on the parchment. Satisfied with his work, James flung down his quill and stretched. "Thank Merlin," he sighed. Now that that's done, I'm sure I can leave the rest for tomorrow. He rolled up his piece of parchment and tucked it into his bag. James checked his watch; it was one-thirty now. Feeling a wave of boredom crash over him, James exhaled loudly and drummed his fingers on the table. What the hell can I do now? he wondered to himself. I don't really want to do anymore homework, but I may not have a choice…Or maybe that book on the life of Garret van Harden has been returned; I guess I could go check to see if it's in. Deciding to do just that, James pulled his plate closer and took a bite from his food. A few moments later, a sudden thought hit him. "This is the first time that I've been bored in days," he mused aloud. But then again, I have been around Lily Evans twenty-four-seven for nearly a week now. A deep chuckle sounded from James's throat. How could I possibly be bored around her?! Can never give me a moment's peace, that girl. She constantly needs me to calm her down during one of her breakdowns. She never quits lecturing me about everything I do… James laughed again quietly as the image of a hot-tempered Lily came to mind, yelling and flailing her arms about. Although I must admit, there are a few benefits to spending so much time with her. The bickering has been more entertaining; and I am learning more about women and their bloody twisted ways, first hand. Not to mention, I've found out that Evans isn't always as uptight as she seems. A small smile spread across James's face. Well, maybe that's not quite right, but at least I've learned to loosen her up a bit. Evans definitely has room for improvement, but Hell, I'm up for a challenge. On the other hand, she can be quite the comedian (no matter how sarcastic) some of the time… James's grin suddenly faded as a huge realization hit him. Now that he was thinking all of these things at once, he couldn't avoid admitting this comprehension to himself. "Unbelievable," he murmured. "I'm actually learning to enjoy her company." The side of his mouth curled up in distaste, James exhaled loudly and pushed his unfinished meal away. After a moment he stood to his feet, stretched, and left the kitchens to make his way to Gryffindor Tower. His original plan had been to read in the library, to take advantage of the quiet. But now he just wanted to grab his book and head for the Common Room; he was counting on the high noise level to distract him from his thoughts.

Back in the Three Broomsticks, Sirius lightly whacked Lily on the shoulder with the back of his hand. "Hey, Prongs, Moony" he whispered. "Check that out." Lily put her fork down and turned her attention to where Sirius was pointing. A few tables away, there was a small cluster of girls that were openly staring at them, and doing nothing to conceal their interest. When Lily, Sirius, and Remus looked over, they giggled and waved coyly

Lily rolled her eyes and took a sip of her Butterbeer. "Unbelievable," she said. "They have no idea how ridiculous they look. Have they no shame?"

"Apparently not," Remus replied, raising an eyebrow. One of girls left her seat to order a drink at the counter, and it was now visible that the robe she wore was very form-fitting. Remus gave a low whistle. "Wow."

Sirius craned his neck to get a better look. "They may not have any shame, but they certainly shape," he quipped.

"No arguments here," Remus agreed.

Lily snorted lightly in the back of her throat at Sirius and Remus, who were staring blankly with their mouths slightly open. "Would it kill you to put eyes back into your sockets for a few minutes?" she said to them. The two boys paid no attention. "Could you at least blink?"

"Hey, look, James," Remus laughed, nodding his head towards the girls. "The blonde looks like she's paying special attention to you." Lily risked a look at the table. "Why don't you go say hello? Give her a little wave."

"No," Lily said flatly.

"Why not?"

"Why should I? Besides, she's not exactly my type," she added under her breath. The main reason being that she is a she. On her right, Sirius was smiling very fetchingly, and rumpling his hair with his fingers in a way that would make any girl redden.

And Sirius knew that.

Lily grabbed his wrist and forced his hand back on the table. "Stop that!" she hissed. "They're going to come over if you don't quit it."

"Too late," Remus said, grinning slightly.

He was right. The girls were no long seated at the table, but were slowly crossing the room and making their way over. Lily glared at Sirius. "Now look what you've done," she said irritably.

Sirius leaned back easily in his chair, looking smug. "No need to thank me, James, I'm sure this shall be payment enough." He raked a hand through his hair one more time before the young women arrived at their table. Lily folded her arms and sharply sucked in a breath. Oh, God, she thought. Here we go…

One of the girls, the blonde one, pulled a chair from nearby and placed it next to Lily. Her three friends followed suit, seating themselves around the table. "Hey there," one of them said to Sirius, smiling coyly. "We couldn't help noticing you from over there." She held out her hand. "I'm Jessica."

Sirius accepted it and shook it gently. "Sirius Black," he said smoothly.

"You sort of remind me of a friend of mine," Jessica told him, "and I wanted see just how much you look like him up close."

Lily only barely held back the numerous sarcastic comments threatening to break loose.

"These are my friends Nadia, Taryn, and Leila," Jessica continued. Her friends all said hello in turn. "D'you mind if we join you for a while?" It would sort of defeat the purpose of asking since you're already here, Lily thought bitterly.

"Of course not," Remus answered.

Nadia, the one closest to him, rested her chin in her hand and lifted her mouth into a small smile. "What's your name?" she asked him.

Remus turned a light shade of red. "Uh…" he stammered "Remus. Remus Lupin."

"And are you single, Remus Lupin?" Nadia ventured suggestively.

Remus coughed and laughed nervously. "Um…well, I…you know…have never really been in a long relationship…before…" Sirius gave him a sharp poke in the side with his elbow, and Remus coughed again. "I mean, yes. Yes, I am."

Taryn, the one closest to Lily, leaned nearer to her and said, "I suppose you're the shy one of the group?" she asked playfully. "Who are you?"

"That's my buddy, James," Sirius offered.

"James," Taryn repeated, smiling winningly. "I love that name. It suits you well."

"Thanks," Lily said shortly.

"What do you guys do for a living?" Leila asked them.

"Actually," Lily began. "We're all still—"

"—training as Aurors," Sirius interrupted easily. "It takes a very long time, as I'm sure you know. But we are steadily climbing our way to success."

"Really," Nadia breathed. "Is it very difficult?"

"Oh, terribly," Sirius answered. He had taken on a troubled expression, but there was an unmistakable glint of mischief in his eyes. "In fact, we're just relaxing now after coming from a particularly strenuous training course."

"Yeah, my cousin is an Auror," Taryn said. "He told me those things are really tiring."

"We had to do it over…Remus, how many time was it again?"

"Oh, five, maybe six or seven," Remus added carelessly. "I'm not really sure how many. I lost count."

"Actually," Sirius said, wincing and rubbing his shoulder. "I think I pulled my shoulder muscle…Ouch! Oh yeah, definitely pulled a muscle."

"Oh, you poor thing," Jessica told him, massaging Sirius's shoulder gently.

"Don't worry," Sirius sighed miserably. "It isn't nearly as painful as last week, though, when I fell and twisted my ankle. Unfortunately, it's still a tad tender. On top of that, they made me finish the obstacle." All four girls expressed feelings of worry.

"Oh, I hope it wasn't too bad!"

"Did they give you the day off?"

"I can't imagine going through that every day."

"Maybe you should take a break."

"How long do you have until you're finished with training?" Jessica asked.

"Oh, about five years from now," Sirius answered nonchalantly.

"Five years?" Nadia echoed, looking at them in disbelief. "How long have you three been training?"

"Yeah, if you begin straight out of school then you surely you should be done by now," Jessica added. Then she squinted her eyes and studied Sirius closely. "Exactly how long have you been out of school?"

Sirius and Remus exchanged anxious glances. Lily turned her head away, hand covering her mouth to keep herself from bursting into laughter. Sirius cleared his throat and regained his confident composure. "Well…" he began. "We've actually been out quite a while, now. A few years in fact. Right, Remus?" Remus nodded quickly. "However, unlike the normal graduate, we didn't decide to be Aurors until a few months ago. Before I changed my direction, I was studying to be a Healer."

Remus hurried to jump in. "And I was planning to…travel the world and become a master of ancient languages."

Sirius jerked his thumb toward Lily. "And our friend James here wanted to be a counselor. It seemed to fit him perfectly since he was known as the sensitive, understanding type, back in our Hogwarts days."

"Ha! Like Hell!" Lily blurted out before she could stop herself.

"And as you can see," Sirius continued, gesturing with his hand. "He has had a change of mind since then."

"So, you're older than all of the other students there?" Leila asked.

"Just a bit," Remus answered.

"And how old are you?"

"Twenty-one," he told her. Unfortunately it was at the same time when Sirius said, "Twenty-two." They glanced quickly at each other, with identical looks of dread.

"Uh, twenty-two," Remus corrected.

"Twenty-one," Sirius said at the same time. Remus glared at him as Leila, Jessica, Nadia, and Taryn gave them confused looks. Lily bit down hard on her bottom lip. Oh, I'd like to see them work their way out of this one. "Actually," Sirius attempted to explain. "I'm twenty-two, just turned, you see."

Remus caught on instantly. "And I'm twenty-one about to be twenty-two," he supplied.

"And I've got to get used to being twenty-two and saying that I'm twenty-two instead of twenty-one."

"And I need to stop saying that I'm twenty-two when I'm really twenty-one. About to be twenty-two. It's all very simple."

"Uh, yeah!" agreed Sirius enthusiastically.

"Well, I'm about to be twenty-one," Jessica commented. Then she smiled and flipped her hair over her shoulder. "I think that's a healthy age difference, don't you?"

Sirius quirked the side of his mouth into a grin. "I'm sure it is," he said charismatically, making her blush.

Her friend Nadia checked her watch and announced, "I'd love to keep talking, guys, but it's nearly two-fifteen. We all have to get to work."

"Oh, damn, she's right," Leila groaned. "That's a shame; it was a lot fun."

Jessica stood up and put her chair back where it came from, and her friends did the same. "Well," she said, slinging her bag over her shoulder. "It was great talking to you three." She turned to Sirius and winked. "Especially you," she added. Then Jessica pulled out a quill and scribbled something down on a napkin. "Here, this is my address. I'm connected to the network. Maybe you could Floo over sometime and we can pick up where we left off, yeah?" She lifted an eyebrow in a way that in no way suggested that they would be talking.

"I think I could do that," Sirius said, accepting the napkin graciously.

Leila smile regretfully at Remus and said, "I would give my address as well, since you're quite the cutie." Remus looked down, colored, and made a modest gesture with his hand. "But I'm connected, unfortunately."

"Boyfriend?" Remus asked her.

"Fiancé," she told him, showing him her left hand. "And it's sort of looked down upon to date someone other than him, since I am taken."

Remus raised his eyebrows in surprise. "Ah," he said solemnly. "Yes, that would be small setback, wouldn't it?"

"But I'm free," Nadia offered, grinning merrily. She handed Remus a small card. "You can use that any time."

Jessica hit Nadia lightly on the shoulder. "C'mon," she said to her, nodding in the direction of the door. "We can't be late." Turning to Sirius, she waggled her fingers in a wave. "Good luck with your training."

"Thanks! I'll see you later, and until then," Sirius held up the napkin she gave him, "I'll be keeping this very safe."

"I'm sure you will!" With a parting grin and a wink, Jessica linked arms with Nadia and rushed out of the door, giggling loudly the entire way.

"It was nice talking to you all," said Leila, then she ran to catch up with Jessica and Nadia.

"Bye!" Remus called after her.

Lily was about to breathe a sigh of relief, but then she realized that there was still one girl left. Taryn was still by her side, reaching in her bag and yanking out her quill. Before Lily could react, her hand was being snatched away and written on. "I get that you don't talk much," Taryn said to her. "But maybe I could break you out of your shell with a one-on-one conversation?" Tossing her head, Taryn flipped her long hair over her shoulder and smiled. "You know, over coffee or something?"

Lily pulled her hand away as quick as she could without seeming rude. "Um…sure," she muttered, resisting the urge to wipe her hand. "Maybe."

"Great! See ya later then." With that said, Taryn hurried after her three friends.

When she was gone, Lily grabbed a napkin rubbed her hand vigorously. "Can you believe that?" she said.

"Barely," Remus said in awe, still staring at the door. "We just got hit on by older girls."

"Women, my friend," Sirius corrected gleefully. "Older women. I knew I was attractive, but I never realized the power of my own allure." He paused to consider what he had said, then shook his head. "Wait, no…no, I've always known that. You two haveme and my Sirius Charm to thank for those addresses you have."

Remus finally pulled his gaze away from the entrance. "Padfoot," he began seriously, mouth twitching slightly. "Never, have I ever been so proud and grateful to have you as my friend. I mean that."

Sirius smirked. "Who's the man, Moony?" he coaxed.

Remus rolled his eyes, but couldn't stop the smile spreading on his face. "You are," he admitted reluctantly.

"And who is the ultimate, most alluring being you've ever known?"

Remus's grin grew. "You are."

"And who's paying for my meal?"

Remus quirked an eyebrow in amusement as he crossed his arms, tilting his head slightly to the side. "You are," he answered in a definite tone.

Sirius shrugged and slumped down into his seat. "It was worth a try," he said sulkily.

Lily rested an elbow on the table and picked up her fork again. "You two do realize that you can't really follow through on what you told those girls? You know, about going over to their houses and stuff?"

"And why the hell not?" Sirius demanded. "I worked very hard for that information!"

"Sirius, you told them that you were twenty-one—"

"Twenty-two," he and Remus protested together.

"—and that you were training as Aurors I still can't believe they actually bought that!"

"I am pretty good, aren't I?"

"And besides," Lily added, fixing Sirius with a stern look. "I thought you liked Parker. What about her?"

"What about her?" Sirius countered.

"Well, you asked her out, didn't you?"

"Yeah, and?" he said, looking puzzled. "We haven't gone anywhere yet, James, and she's not my girlfriend or anything like that." He paused to take a sip of his drink. When he glanced over the top of the glass and caught Lily's look of uncertainty, he explained, "Don't get me wrong, Prongs, it isn't that I don't like Parker. I like her a lot, as you've heard me say. But at the same time I'm not going to take things so seriously that I just stop everything I normally do." Then he grinned deviously. "And anyway, that would be terribly selfish of me, don't you think? There's more than enough Sirius Charm to go around."

Lily tried to glare at him, but it dissolved into a smile. "If you're sure," she muttered, shaking her head. Then she pushed her plate away and leaned back in her chair. "Alright, I'm full. You ready to go, yet?"

Remus nodded. "Yeah, I am."

"Cool," Sirius said. He reached into his pocket, pulled out a bunch of sickles, and threw them on the table. "Let's head over to Zonko's, now. I think the new issue of Zinger catalogue is out! I've been waiting for it to come out for ages 'cause I think they finally have some new products out from Galantino's Company."

"I know," Remus said excitedly, getting to his feet. "Did you hear about the breath mints that actually make your breath smell like anchovies for three days?"

"Yeah, plus, there's this one deodorant that will give you absolutely horrible body odor!" Sirius raised his eyebrows, suddenly looking devious and crafty. "I think I'm going to use it on Peter."

Remus gave him a side-long glance. "Padfoot, that's not right and you know it," he said grimly.

"Oh, come on, what harm could it do? It's only for a little while."

Remus rolled his eyes, waving his hand carelessly. "Whatever you want to do, Sirius, just leave me out of it. C'mon, let's go." He and put down his share of sickles and Lily followed suit.

"Hey, Sirius," Lily said, pushing in her chair. "You've got something on you're cheek."

He wiped his face with the side of his hand. "Did I get it?" Lily shook her head, and Sirius reached into his pocket and pulled out a napkin, rubbing vigorously on his face. "How about now?"

"Yeah, that's fine."

Sirius tossed the napkin carelessly on the table. "Alright, I'm ready. By the way, have you two heard about that new drink Honeydukes is coming out with next month? It's supposed to have so much fizz in it that it lifts you off you a few inches off your feet with every sip…"

As they left the little café one of the waitresses started to clean up after them. She piled the empty dishes and glasses onto her tray, as well as the dirty napkins, not noticing the neatly written address that one of them contained.

In the Ravenclaw Common Room several students relaxed in their residence, and more than a few sulked over the loss of their game. In a solitary corner close to the fire two seventh years reclined in two plush blue chairs, working on their weekend homework. Or rather, one was doing homework; the other was pestering him on about a somewhat touchy subject.

"C'mon, Derek!"

"What now?"

"You know what! You haven't told me anything about last night! I want to know every single detail."

Derek sighed and rolled his eyes. "Did it ever occur to you that I might just want to keep it private?" he said coldly.

Anthony disregarded his friend's aggravated tone with a carefree laugh. "That's a load of bull!" he exclaimed. "Since when have you ever kept this kind of thing private?"

Derek threw his quill down angrily. "Since now," he snapped. "It's none of your business, Anthony, so just drop it!" For a few minutes neither boy said a word, and the only sound that was heard was the harsh scratching of Derek's quill against his parchment. Finally, Anthony spoke up.

"You know," he said slowly. "You were awfully excited about this whole thing Friday afternoon. I'm surprised you're not spilling with details." When Derek said nothing, Anthony narrowed his eyes; his suspicions were increasing. "Unless," Anthony continued slyly, putting the tip of his quill on chin. "Unless there's nothing to tell…"

Derek's head snapped up, a scowl etched into his features. "What the hell makes you say that?" he said dangerously.

"Oh, come on, Derek!" Anthony snorted. "I've known you for six years. Between third year and now, you have never left out anything that's had to do with a girl. The only reason why that would change right now, after crowing about to everyone within earshot, would be that you have nothing to crow about!" Derek didn't respond, but his deepened scowl and firmer grip on the quill gave away the truth. "Ha!" Anthony shouted, pointing at Derek triumphantly. "Nothing happened, did it? That's why you're so pissed off! You were turned down by Lily Evans!"

Derek clamped a hand over Anthony's mouth, abruptly cutting off his hysterical laughter. "Keep it down, will you?" he hissed in a low voice. "Let the whole bloody house know, while you're at it!" Derek removed his hand and leaned back into his chair, glowering at Anthony.

"What's wrong?" Anthony taunted. "Are you afraid someone will hear you and your suave reputation among the ladies will be shattered? Guess your ego's been deflated now, huh?"

Derek cuffed him on the back of his head. "Shut up, Anthony!"

"Hey! Relax, mate! How bad could it have gone?" Leaning his cheek onto his hand, Derek gave him a dark look. "Ooh, that bad, eh?" Anthony said, wincing. "What went wrong? I thought you said the dinner in the astronomy tower was fool proof. It's worked before, hasn't it?"

"Yeah," Derek muttered.

"Did you have the floating candles?"

"Yes."

"And the couch with the blanket?"

"Yes."

"And you did the star gazing thing, too?"

"YES!"

"So what went wrong?"

"I don't know!" Derek shouted, throwing his hands up in frustration. "She was acting all weird through the entire night! I had brought a nice dinner of a steak and rice and she told me she was a vegetarian!"

"So?" Anthony replied.

"Nothing, but when she said it Lily looked at me like I had committed some sort of terrible crime, like I was the bane of her existence or something."

Anthony shrugged. "Well, that would be the logical reaction after giving meat to a vegetarian, wouldn't it? It's probably some sort of weird vegetarian sin or something, being offering meat, right? Maybe you unknowingly insulted her by tempting her, you know? I mean, it's probably the equivalent of committing blasphemy…or something along those lines…" Anthony trailed off, staring into space with an expression of complete perplexity. "Never will understand them vegetarians," he muttered, half to himself. "I myself come from a family of devout meat eaters…hell, if someone refused meat it'd probably be considered immoral or something…"

Derek rolled his eyes at his friend's babbling. "But it wasn't just that," he said, slouching deeper into his chair. "She treated me like I had the plague all evening. Every time I tried to touch her, she'd leap away as though I was going to rape her or something."

Anthony scratched the back of his neck, furrowing his eyebrows in thought. "Did you do anything to offend her? Besides offering her meat, I mean?"

Derek shook his head. "No," he replied. Anthony crossed his arms and looked at Derek cynically. "What?" Anthony's expression didn't change. "Alright, so maybe I let my eyes wander a bit," Derek said defensively. "But it's not like I jumped her or anything." Again, Anthony raised his eyebrows at his friend in a knowing look. "Okay, so I sort of did! But she shouldn't have taken it so personally!" Derek told him. "Besides, most girls love it when I kiss them. Lily, on the other hand, completely flipped out."

Anthony was quiet for a moment before asking, "So, what happened after you kissed her?"

Derek sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "She got a little…physical," he said, shifting in his seat. "But not in the way I had hoped." Anthony nodded understandably. "Then, after a few words, she walked out on me. And that was the end of it."

"Why are you so upset about it?" Anthony asked. "You told me you didn't really care about her, so what's the big deal?" He paused before saying, "That hasn't changed or anything, has it?"

"Well, of course not, but I can't believe she turned me down!" Derek cried. "I have never been refused before!"

"You have now," Anthony murmured, a smirk playing on his face. Before Derek could respond, another classmate strode over and occupied the chair next to him.

"So, Thomas," the boy said. "What happened on your big date with Lily Evans, eh?" He tilted his head, grinning suggestively. "The word around the house is that you have quite the reputation for giving a girl a wild night. So, what did your charm accomplish this time, hm?"

Anthony folded his arms again, regarding Derek with raised eyebrows. "Yes, Derek, do tell us," he challenged innocently. "What did your charm accomplish this time?"

Derek scowled briefly at his friend, before turning to his housemate and putting on a smirk. "Now, Connor," he said smugly. "We all know that it is considered most ungentlemanly to talk about the extent of one's relationships."

"What gentleman?" Connor retorted, looking at Derek as if he were insane. "I know you're all polite and stuff when it comes to the girls, but when among your own you are anything but a gentleman. So don't start gettin' all proper on me, Derek, and tell me what happened!"

Derek paused, both for dramatic effect and stalling time. "You really want to know what happened with Lily, then?" he asked his housemate.

Connor titled his head and heaved a sigh, giving Derek an exasperated glare. "Now, what gave you that idea?" he remarked scathingly.

"Alright, fine" Derek told him, the traces of a devious smile on his face. "I'll have to warn you, Connor; there are a few things that just can't be described in words."

Connor's eyes glittered, containing a hungry flicker. "Ooh, she was that good, eh?"

A passing fifth year overheard Connor's question, and immediately came to a halt. "Who was good?" he inquired eagerly. "Who are you talking about? I want to know!"

"Lily Evans, a sixth year in Gryffindor," Connor replied excitedly. "Derek here had a date with her last night. Apparently, she has wild streak hidden behind that studious image."

The boy quickly grabbed a chair from a few feet away and plunked it down next to Connor. "Well, you know what they say; it's the quietest ones that are the best at…well, you know." He leaned close to Derek and lowered his voice. "Is it true, mate?"

Connor snorted. "If you can't even say the word 'sex', then you are obviously not meant to take part in this conversation, young' un," he added mockingly as he ruffled the boy's hair. Connor just laughed when his hand was slapped away violently.

Derek looked around at his small audience before catching Anthony's eye. Anthony returned his gaze with a penetrating look of warning. Derek just acknowledged it with smug grin and a defiant lift of an eyebrow, before leaning lazily into his armchair and beginning what would turn out to be a very elaborate and tall tale.

"Hey, James, smell this!" Sirius thrust a small square card under Lily's nose and, because there was no warning, Lily automatically breathed in the scent.

"Oh my God!" she shrieked. Lily doubled over and squeezed her eyes close, covering her nose with both hands. "What the hell are you trying to do, poison me? What is that?"

"It's a sample of that deodorant I was telling you about. Isn't it great?" Sirius laughed and waved it through the air.

Lily grabbed his wrist with one hand, and pinched her nose shut with the other. "Stop!" she complained. "I feel sick enough as it is. Please don't contaminate what little purity that's left in the air."

Sirius took one last tentative sniff and slipped the sample into his pocket. "Man, people will drop like flies when Peter walks around smelling like this."

"You'll be lucky if they don't drop dead," Lily retorted, wiping at her tearing eyes.

In fact, there were a lot of things that could make a person drop dead in Zonko's. Lily came very close to having a heart attack when Remus handed her a plastic tarantula that suddenly sprung to life in her palm. Then Sirius gave her a small candy that Lily had stupidly put into her mouth without question, which made the inside so hot she breathed fire (luckily missing a shelf, or else she would have had a large bill to pay). But in spite of the slight sense of danger, Lily couldn't help but having a good time. After her heart rate went down from the shock, she could easily picture herself buying a whole bag of plastic insects to place in Parker's bed. Hmm… A small grin crossed her face before she grabbed two plastic spiders and threw them into her basket.

"Hey, Prongs!"

Lily didn't answer straight away; she was too busy peering curiously at what seemed to be a shape-shifting, jiggling mold of jell-o that actually crawled away when touched.

"James!"

Lily wrinkled her nose in disgust as she watched the "jell-o" slide away. I swear, I'll never eat jell-o or pudding again…

"James!"

Lily started and turned in the direction from where the voice had come. "What? Sorry?"

Remus heaved an exasperated sigh and slightly lifted his arms, which were full of Zonko's merchandise. "A little help, here?" he pleaded.

"Oh, right." Lily hurried to grab a basket and held it out while Remus dumped his items in.

"Thanks," he said, taking the basket from her. "I thought I was going to only buy a few things, but I guess I was wrong."

"What's it all for?" Lily asked, frowning slightly and glancing down at all of the products. "I always considered you the most mature of the group."

The side of Remus's mouth twitched into a smirk, which gave him an uncharacteristically devious appearance. "That may be true, mate," he told her. "But remember, considering that neither you nor Sirius hardly acts your age at all, the fact that I'm the most mature out of us three really isn't saying much. The only significant difference between us when it comes to maturity is that I usually don't make a fool of myself due to immature behavior. I, unlike you and Sirius, like to keep my childish side among people I know. "

As if on cue, there was a loud, disgusting, farting noise from a few behind them where Sirius has been sitting on a small chair. Every customer in the store turned to look at him as he leaped out of his seat as though on fire, and stared down at it in shock. Sirius raised his head and looked around the shop in horror.

"I didn't do it!" he exclaimed hurriedly, hands lifted in defense. He pointed frantically down at the seat. "It was the chair, I swear it!" All he received were looks of doubt and disgust from all sides. The only exception was the employee on duty at the register, who was bent over with his face hidden in his arms, and had his shoulders shaking with silent laughter. He obviously was very aware of what the chair had done, but he made not attempt to convince the customers.

Sirius, on the other hand, was still trying to convey his innocence. "Seriously!" he said earnestly. "The bloody thing did that as soon as I sat down!"

A young man nearby snickered and nudged his friend with his elbow. "Pathetic," he murmured arrogantly to his companion. "He can't even think of a good fabrication. A five-year-old could do better."

Sirius heard the comment and rounded on him, his eyebrows drawn together into a fierce scowl. "If you're so clever why don't you sit on it and see if you can think of a good explanation for a farting chair, smart-arse?" he challenged crossly. The boy just looked down at Sirius with a condescending sneer before walking away. Sirius's scowl deepened and he glared down at the chair which had caused him so much trouble. "Sodding piece of crap," he muttered, kicking at it furiously. Then he looked up and caught the stares from Lily and Remus, which clearly showed their efforts to conceal their laughter. He crossed his arms defiantly, in a weak attempt to maintain his some of his pride. "What?" he demanded, shrugging and trying to appear nonchalant.

Remus just smiled, shook his head, and turned back to Lily. "And that, my friend, would be the proof of my point." He laughed softly and strolled up to the front counter to purchase his items.

A/n: And on that note, I'll try as fast as I can to hurry along part II! Any suggestions I'm totally open to!

Until next time,

Spirit