"Okay, so since this place is filled with ponies, we'll probably have to walk on all fours." Whispered platinum. One house that stood apart from the rest of them, caught fluffles' eye.

"hey, dude, that bitch lives in a hollowed tree!" he said.

"Relax fluffles, plenty of people live in trees. Midgets for example... or flood victims." Said platinum bullet.

"no, but dude, we should knock on the door!" fluffles shouted.

"no dude, I don't even know how to walk with four legs, we'll make a scene."

"FOR GLORY! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" yelled fluffles as he charged toward the house, and head-butt the door. Twilight sparkle was still sucking at COD… umm… I mean… Call of Pony (no copyright issues here!) inside, and she heard the loud thump on the door, followed by several loud thumps.

"Spike! Could you get that?" she asked.

"NO WE DO NOT HAVE A MOMENT TO SPARE FOR PONY JESUS! NOW STOP COMING HERE!" yelled spike as he walked toward the door. When spike opened the door, you can imagine his surprise to see a fucking dinosaur at the door. He just stood there wide eyed for a few moments. He saw platinum lean to the side, and saw that there was blood dripping down his chin (from when he lost that tooth)

"Hey, is there anyone here we can talk to about real estate? We're new in town." said platinum. But before he even got halfway through his sentence, spike screamed, shut the door, and sprinted inside.

"shit, spike! What the hell's got into you?" she screamed

"GODDAMMIT! TELL SPIKE ENOUGH WITH THE GODDAMNED NOOBTUBE!" yelled rainbow dash over the mic.

"wait a minute… spike are you botting!?" asked TS in horror

"BOTTING!? SPIKE, I WILL END YOU! YOU CHEATING LITTLE PURPLE FUCK!" yelled pinkie pie.

"TWILIGHT! THERE'S A PSYCHO ON A DINOSAUR AT THE DOOR! AND HE SAID SOMETHING ABOUT REAL ESTATE!" yelled spike.

"DON'T EVADE YOU HACKER! I BET YOU ALSO GOT AIMBOT!" yelled rainbow dash. They all just rage quit because that game was the same as the previous 11000000 that came out before it. twilight sparkle just answered the door to call spike on his bullshit, but when she opened it, she was shocked as hell to see a velociraptor, a pony with blood dripping down his chin, and a little filly Pegasus in a color changing bow tie. She was so shocked that spike wasn't just being an asshole that she welcomed them in.

"I'm twilight sparkle! It's great to meet new friends like you!" she said nervously

"DUDE LET'S KICK THEIR ASSES! THEY'RE ASKING FOR IT!" yelled fluffles.

"NO FLUFFLES SHUT THE FUCK UP!" yelled platinum.

"uhh… you got a little…" she gestured to her chin, and platinum wiped his mouth, and looked at his hand.

"oh! This is mine! Don't worry!" he said.

"That's an… interesting weapon your friend is holding…" she said nervously, gesturing to the bat with a nail in it.

"Yeah! I know! It's brand new!" said comet blitz happily.

"So, are you a real estate agent, right? because at the moment we're homeless." Said platinum.

"No, you want the ponyville realty service. This is the library." She said

"Well, that's five minutes I'll never get back. Can you give me directions?"

"yeah, just take a left down (I'm making shit up as I go along, so I don't have time to make up a street name) avenue" said twilight sparkle. Dude, whoever wrote this was really lazy. I'm sure he had good intentions. Any-who, the three of them went to the real estate place, and bought a little house on lazy Writing Boulevard. They then went to the furniture store to get some shit to put in it. The store smelled like floor polish, and there was a stallion behind the front desk wearing whatever furniture salesman wear when trying to sell couches, and beds, and the like.

"Hey, do you have anything in stock that's pet proof?" asked platinum the second he walked in the store.

"Of course! What kind of pet do you have?" asked the store employee.

"Raptor." Said comet.

"Alright! I think we got something in here!" so after a couple minutes of digging around, he pulled out a couch with a large cage attached.

"Uh… what's the cage for?" asked platinum.

"you said you had a raptor" replied the store employee.

"Ok but why a bird cage? Is it for holding rabbits, mice, and stuff? Because I'm pretty sure he wants to hunt, not be fed." asked platinum, confused. The store employee pulled out a dictionary., and flipped to R. it said

Raptor

Noun

Bird of prey

"OH! You got it all wrong! You see, we meant a velociraptor!" said platinum.

"Dude, do you just carry a dictionary around wherever you go?" asked comet

"A velociraptor!? I'll believe it when I see it!"

"FLUFFLES!" called platinum, and the 8 foot sack of Jurassic badass burst through the door.

"I'M GOING TO FUCK YOUR SHIT UP IF WE DON'T HAVE ANYTHING IN THE NEXT 10 MINUTES! GO!" yelled Fluffles. Long story short, they found out that their house was already furnished, so that whole thing was completely pointless. They went to the house, and when they got home, they opened the door, and there was a pink pony sitting there smiling ear to ear.

"Oh, shit! Is this the wrong address? Because I think that they told us our house was here! "Said platinum. the pink pony bounced over to them.

"Nope! This is your home! I've been waiting here! Climbed through the open window!" said the pink pony, in a very overly excited fashion.

"Uh… where I come from, that's called breaking and entering, and I would have a right to shoot you on the spot." Replied platinum.

"My name is pinkie pie!" she said excitedly

"I never asked…" replied platinum.

"You're funny!" pinkie pie laughed. Everyone laughed along nervously, because they were afraid that she would straight up murder them.

"Twilight told me over COP online that there was a new pony in town! So I ran to the real estate office, and they told me you lived here, so I ran over here to greet you! What's your name?" said pinkie

"Platinum… platinum bullet." He replied.

"well platinum, I'm pinkie pie!" she said.

"You just repeated yourself…" said comet

"you know, I love parties! You know what kind is the best?"

"Okay, we'll just put our hooves… hoofs? Into this trap you're clearly leading us into, what is your favorite kind of party?" asked comet.

"SURPRISE PARTIES!" pinkie pie yells, as everybody in ponyville poured out of the attic, and into the bottom floor of his house. Fluffles' pupils became narrow. He shrieked, and snapped up the nearest pony. He almost swallowed him, but platinum stopped him.

"FLUFFLES, NO! SPIT HIM OUT NOW!" he yelled. Fluffles snapped out of it, and spit the poor stallion out. He was covered in dinosaur saliva. He was an alicorn His coat was black, with gold marks on his back, with bright red hair. His cutie mark was an infinity symbol. Platinum knew he recognized the stallion from somewhere

"I'm so sorry! He's a new pet, and I haven't really had time to train him!" said platinum sincerely.

"You should be!" said an annoyed female pony.

"Anyway, continue to tell us about yourself!" she said, all lovey dovey like.

"Oh yeah! So, my cutie mark is an infinity symbol. It symbolizes that no matter what you try, I'll be INFINITELY better at it!" said the strange alicorn, and the group of girls giggled themselves half to death at his stupid joke. Platinum was shocked. He had heard that voice before. It was the unmistakably annoyingly perfectly voice of. It was the voice that had plagued him every day of his school life in the human world. It was none other than…

"GARY STU!" yelled platinum, and sure enough, the alicorn responded to the name by turning around to face platinum.

"Oh my god, it can't be!" he said in horror.