A few weeks had passed and Aston trusted me more than ever. He was planning on introducing me to the rest of his gang soon, which meant I'd find out where he lived. Sean decided we should celebrate my success and have a little family party, everyone left to pick things up for it, except for Bianca, she said she wasn't feeling well. Eli offered to stay with her, but she insisted he go help me pick up the pizza. The car ride was awkward, Eli hadn't spoken to me in weeks, he was angry at me, and I didn't really understand why. Everyone else was proud, but he detested me for even speaking to Aston.

"So, Sean suggesting we have a party, that's a change, isn't it?" Eli stayed silent, so I tried again. "You must be worried about Bianca, she looked like she was feeling pretty bad didn't she?" Again, he didn't say a word, so again I tried. "So Aston gave up a little more information today on-"

"Clare just shut up, please. Just stop it." For the first time in week's, Eli was looking at me.

I parked the car in front of the pizza place, and turned the music down. "Eli, why are you being so cruel to me, family doesn't treat family this way."

"That's just it Clare, that's the problem. The way you talk, the way you act, it's like you're not even you anymore. You deal in absolutes, and you just threw the family card in my face because you didn't get what you wanted."

"So, because of that, I deserve to be treated like a piece of shit?"

Eli sighed, "No, no you don't. I just cant understand, how do you hold his hand, pretend to be his secret lover? it's sickening. Or are you really his lover now?"

I slapped Eli on instinct, and I didn't regret it, I wouldn't let him insinuate something like that. Eli's cheek was red, but he had a smirk on his face. "What's so funny?"

Eli chuckled, "Nothing, I just, I had that coming."

I was utterly confused, "What is really going on? I need you to talk to me, because it bothers me Eli, this constant awkwardness between us."

Eli's green eyes sparkled in the light with curiosity, "Why, tell me why."

"I don't understand, what do you mean why?" I understood his question in all honestly, I just didn't know the answer.

"Why does it bother you, why do you care what I think at all?"

I pursed my lips together embarrassed, "Because it put's a strain on the family, I don't want things to be weird for everyone else."

"You know what, let's just get the damn pizza and go." Eli slammed the car door, leaving me confused as ever. I didn't know why I cared, I didn't know anything anymore.

Eli came back a minute later with the pizza. The drive back to the house I kept looking at him, trying to say something to get him to hate me less. I had just slapped him, so I was off to a rough start.

"Eli, I'm sorry I hit you." My voice was low, full of regret.

Eli smiled, "It's alright, it isn't the first slap I've ever gotten."

"What's so funny?"

Eli began to chuckle, "Bianca, she's hit me a few times, she's got a temper. She's a firecracker, that's for sure."

"You really love her don't you?"

Eli could see the let down expression on my face, "I wouldn't go that far, but I'll always be loyal to her, that's for certain. I wont make the same mistake I did with Julia, because that's the worst thing you can do to a person, cheat on them." I looked away, remembering K.C. Eli noticed, "Clare, what's wrong?"

I laughed, "Now you care?"

Eli frowned, "Clare, I always care. That's why I'm angry, that's why I can't stand thinking of you around that lunatic, he's dangerous. Now tell me what's wrong."

I gave in, "Nothing's wrong, I can just relate. I had a boyfriend who cheated on me before, It was rough."

"Eli raised an eye brow, Do I know him?"

I smirked, "Why, are you going to have a hit put out on him?"

Eli laughed, "You're right, it's best I don't know who it is."

We arrived back at the house, Eli and I sat in silence for a moment. It was like we had so much to say, but we didn't know what it was exactly.

"Eli."

"Clare." Eli paused for a moment, as if changing his mind about what he was going to say. "We better go inside, Bianca's waiting for me."

I looked away, "You're right."

Eli and I headed inside, no one was in living room. Eli looked around, concerned "I should go check on B, see if she's feeling better." I nodded my head, it was almost as if he was asking my permission. Eli walked to the back room, and I started to clean up a little, the rest of the group would be back soon. Before I could even pull out the Windex I heard a scream, It was Bianca.

"Eli! It isn't what it look's like! Baby, please, please listen to me!" I ran to the back room to see Bianca naked, barley covering herself with a sheet. The boy next to her changing back into his clothes was one I recognized all too well, Drew Torres.

Eli had his hands on his head, looking back and forth at both of them with wild eyes. "What the FUCK! What the mother FUCK! You fuckin Bitch, I knew it, I knew something was going on, I just never thought it was this shit." Eli turned his attention to Drew, "You, get the fuck out before I slit your god damn throat, you punk ass." Eli grabbed Drew by the neck and threw him past me, and out the door. He then kicked him, literally, in the ass. All the way until he hit the front door, Eli's eyes were in a rage, like he couldn't control himself.

Drew was frightened, so frightened he could barley speak. "Man, I didn't know!"

Eli pulled out a knife, "Bullshit! Bullshit you didn't know, do you know how disrespectful it is, to walk into my house, and find you banging my girl? That kind of disrespect doesn't go unpunished."

Bianca came running out with tears streaming down her face, 'Eli stop it! Put the knife down, please!"

Eli turned his head, "Shut up bitch! Get the fuck back in the room, that's an order!" Eli's voice was aggressive, and he was breathing heavy. I had always wondered what Eli was like when he and the boy's were taking care of business, I Imagined this is what it looked like. To my surprise Bianca went back into the room right away, but then again, in this lifestyle your partner was your master, you had to listen to them.

Eli held the knife to Drew's neck, and I finally found the courage to speak. "Eli, please, put it down." My voice was weak from my crying.

Eli turned his head again to look at me, "Clare go back in the room I don't want you to see this!"

I took a step closer, "Eli, I'm not Bianca, I'm not going to bow down. Put it down, ok. You don't need to do this." I was standing directly behind Eli, and I could see the tears streaming down Drew's face, and the blood that was slowly starting to appear on his neck.

Eli was gritting his teeth, trying to keep in control. "Clare, I don't want to hurt you, I don't want to, please get out."

"Eli, then don't hurt me. You always talk to me about being myself, well you need to take your own advice right now. This is something you've been taught, but it isn't you. You love theater, and writing, not killing people. Killing, stealing, selling, that's not you, put the knife down." Eli kept shaking his head in protest, never moving the knife from Drew's neck. I put my arms around him and whispered, "Eli please, for me, please don't be like this." I closed my eyes, holding on tight, and I finally heard the sound of the knife dropping. My eyes were still shut, I was afraid Eli had slit his throat before dropping the knife. I heard to sound of the door slamming shut, and I opened my eyes. Drew was gone, it was just Eli and I. We both fell to floor, and he began to sob in my arms.

"Everyone leaves and betrays me Clare, everyone."

His tears were soaking my shirt, and all I wanted to do was protect him from the pain he was feeling, "Eli not me, I'm not going anywhere ok."

Eli looked up at me with wide and teary eyes, for a fleeting moment I thought he was going to kiss me, and I wanted him too. The back room door opened erasing the moment, Bianca came out fully dressed with tears in her eyes. "Eli please let me talk to you, it isn't what you think. It was a mistake, I didn't mean for it to go that far. You've just been so distant, and I've been so lonely, we can fix this, please tell me we can fix it."

Eli got out of my arms, and stood up wiping his face of tears. "Bianca, trust and respect is all you can ever have in this lifestyle that we live, love doesn't exist in it. We both know that, so your lonely statement doesn't really mean shit. What you and I had, it was all based on a mutual respect and trust we had for each other, that is dead now. I wont bring this up in front of any of the family, because unlike you I'm loyal. You can fuck whoever you want, not that you weren't anyways, it doesn't matter to me, not anymore."

Bianca ran to Eli, tugging on his arm, "Please, please don't leave me." Her voice was cracking, she was having a break down.

Eli calmly pulled her off of him, "Bianca, please enjoy the party tonight. Tell the others I had some things to do for the play, and that I will be back tonight. Don't be upset, it happened, you and I have survived guns, knives, drugs, getting jumped, etc., we can survive a break up. There's no room for crying, worry about business, because in the end that's all we have."

Eli's mood had changed from angry, to being so calm within seconds. I stared at him in disbelief as he walked out of the door. I turned to look at Bianca, who was pulling a lip stick out of her purse. "Bianca what the hell are you doing?"

She spoke as she applied her red lipstick , "Clare, there's nothing I can do, it's over. Eli is right, crying get's you no where, that's rule number one in the gang. It's not in our nature to be weak."

I couldn't believe my eyes, they had been broken up a total of 5 minutes and she was already fixing her makeup. "Did you love him at all Bianca? Seriously, you just broke up, how can you both already be ok?"

She laughed, "Of course I love Eli, he's family. We will always love each other, we just wont fuck anymore."

I shook my head in disbelief, their rules and unusual ways of handling things was too much for me to handle, I left the house, determined to not come back.