Chapter 5 – Planning

The next morning I woke up and realized that Richey wouldn't be at school today. But I would get through it. I had to. I was Jimmy Moriarty and I was a survivor. I could get through this just like I had gotten through the other crap I had been through.

Mum dropped me off at school and I went through the day trying not to imagine Richey being there. I could see him sitting next to me in class, talking to me at lunch time, laughing with me on the bus on the way to swim practice. Now I sat in my seat alone, trying to remain unseen. I didn't know why I was still on the swim team. Richey had enjoyed the team more than I had and without him here, there was really no point in continuing. I guess I did it to remind me of all the fun times we had together. And I could always quit the team if I really wanted to; there was nothing keeping me here anymore.

I filed into the gym with the other boys and mechanically went through practice. I didn't care about doing well in practice. I wasn't the best swimmer on the team and I didn't want to be the best. I would leave that title to bullies like Carl Powers.

As if I had summoned him with my mind, Carl came over to me after practice.

"I see your little friend isn't here today. Where is he?"

"He moved away."

"Aww, that's too bad," he teased. "I guess that means that you have no friends here now."

"It doesn't matter," I said. "I'm used to it."

"I can see that. I don't know why Richey even befriended you. But I guess you two were very similar. You are both puny little outcasts who will never amount to anything," he said, laughing.

Before I could stop myself, I lunged at Carl, knocking him to the ground. Although he was a lot bigger than me, I pinned him to the ground and began to punch him. It felt good to finally show Carl that he couldn't boss us around anymore. For too long he had ruled this swim team like it was his and I was proud that I could be the person who put him in his place.

Eventually, Coach pulled me off Carl and took me aside to one of the locker rooms.

"What was that all about?" he asked. "I've never seen you lash out like that. Is there something wrong?"

"I'm fine," I muttered.

"Is there anything wrong?"

"I said I'm fine," I repeated. "I just need to be alone for a minute."

"Okay. I'll come back when we're ready to leave."

I sat in the locker room, my hands shaking. It felt good to beat up Carl; he had laughed at me and Richey and that was unacceptable. But what if Carl got mad at me again and lashed out? I didn't want to be at his mercy again. I could see what he could do and I didn't want to be at the receiving end of his anger. I would just have to steer clear of him.

A few minutes I climbed back on the bus and returned home. Mum tried to make conversation but I just ignored her. I wasn't in the mood to talk to her. I had had a difficult day and I just wanted to be alone. I had spent one day without Richey and I had beat up Carl. One day alone and I had gotten in a fight. I hadn't realized until now how much I needed Richey to keep me in line. I hadn't gotten into a single fight while he had been here. Now he was gone and I was getting into fights. I had gotten in a lot of fights before I came here and I thought I had finally got past that.

Maybe I just needed to quit the swim team and distance myself from Carl. I didn't want to get into fights, really. I was tired of living like that; I had found a better lifestyle and I wanted to stick to it. But the fact still remained that Carl had made fun of me and Richey and I couldn't let that slide. He would have to pay for what he did, no matter how much my conscious told me he didn't.

I spent the rest of the night devising plans of how I could make Carl pay. I would probably only have one shot at getting him really good so I needed to make it count. Several scenarios ran through my head, but I couldn't come up with the perfect one. Maybe tomorrow I could devise the perfect plan. The only thing I knew was that I wouldn't rest until I made Carl feel as bad as he had made me feel.

The next morning at school, I didn't pay much attention to my classes: my mind was too busy planning my epic comeback. By the time swim practice came around that afternoon, I still couldn't think of anything good enough for Carl. Maybe something would happen in practice that would help me decide his punishment.

As usual, Carl dominated swim practice with his superiority and made fun of all the new swimmers who he deemed were beneath him. It sickened me to watch this but what could I do? It wasn't like I could fight Carl and make him back off. I needed to be subtle and discreet if I wanted to best Carl.

Swim practice ended without a confrontation with Carl and although I was glad about that, I was mad that I still couldn't think of a way to bring him down. How did he humiliate people so easily? Maybe it was just my personality, but I needed to make Carl pay. And soon. I would probably be moving on soon and I needed to enact my revenge before I left.

"Hey, squirt," Carl said as he came over to my seat on the bus. "Still mourning over your little friend being gone?"

"Go away, Carl," I muttered. "I don't have time to deal with you."

"You better make time!" he said and grabbed my shirt.

"Hey, let me go!" I yelled.

"Who's going to make me? Huh? No one cares about you. Not even little Richey. He told me once that he was tired of you always coming over to his house. Said you were a little leech."

"That's not true!"

"Deny it all you want but Richey wasn't really your friend. I bet he was glad when he had to move. It was a way to get away from you."

"You're lying!"

"Tell yourself that all you want but the truth remains. He's better off without you." Carl dropped me back in my seat and returned to his, laughing his head off.

What he said couldn't be true. Richey was my friend and he would never say things like that. Especially to someone like Carl. Carl would pay for what he said. My anger against him was refueled and I would do anything to make sure he paid for all the hurtful things he said.

I arrived home that afternoon to find the house empty. Mum must be making a delivery. That would give me time to see if there was anything in this flat that would help me get my revenge. I searched through Mum's journal where she kept a list of all her drugs and what they did. Surely there had to be something in here that would help me. After searching for a few minutes, I found a listing called botulinum that looked like it might work. Mum's entry said that it would relax the user's muscles for several hours. But what triggered my interest most was her warning at the bottom:

THIS SUBSTANCE IS POISONOUS IF TAKEN IN EXCESS.

This was exactly what I was looking for. I found Mum's stash of the drug and took a little. I was sure that with all the other ones she had, she wouldn't miss one little bag. Now that I had the means of exacting my revenge, I just needed to find the right time to execute my plan.

I went to sleep that night feeling better than I had in a long time. I would finally be able to make Carl pay for what he had said about Richey and me. My plan might be a little extreme, but I didn't care. He deserved what was coming for him: he couldn't insult people without expecting to pay for it later. All I had to do was figure out how I would poison Carl and then my revenge would be complete.