I know. I'm a horrible person. I looked in the mirror today and saw Moffat for a split second. I hate it. But I also love it. *rubs hands together*

In all seriousness, I'm sorry. I'm really sorry but it needed to be done. I cried when I wrote the last chapter but he wasn't fitting properly into the box with the plot bunny.

Also, this chapter has a plot development that might not be ideal. Similar to what I did in chapter 11, I suppose as far as shock factor.

The initial months after the whole thing with the 456 and the Karn I spend in solitude. Not completely of course. But emotionally I pull back from everyone. Not that I had really let them in, in the first place.

I feel empty if I'm honest with myself. Partly because Meta is gone but also because he's no longer there to fill the hole where my blood family once was. But I have a new family now. Family in bond if not in blood. And he was part of it. And it hurts that the universe ripped him from me.

I sit and I read most of the time. And I write. I begin to add my own stories to my journal. It's no longer a simple log of episodes that I've seen. It's a log of episodes that I have lived. I add in the changes and new characters as they appear.

After two months of this particular moping, Donna is the one who gets fed up with it completely. She barges in on me one day and literally forces me to get dress and drags me off to go do something. Anything.

"You can't just sit around doing nothing for the rest of your life. How boring is that?! You my friend are coming with me to shop or go to a movie, anything to get you out of this room!"

"But Donna..."

"No buts. I am getting you out of here, at the very least to take a break from my mother. I don't know how you're still sane, staying with her."

"I have Wilf."

"Grandad does make it bearable but you can only take so much. Come on!"

I have no strength to protest against her. She's far too determined. And I love her for it. She actually gets me to smile.

Rose and the Doctor come back for me. But two months for me has only been a couple weeks for them. Rose is still feeling ill. The Doctor is concerned by it but Rose is adamant that she's fine. I'm not wholly convinced.

Rose pulls me aside and asks me to go with her to get something. She won't tell me what but I agree. When she leads me into the chemists I begin to get suspicious.

"Rose? You don't think...?"

She bites her lip. "I don't know. That's why I need you with me."

"Why not bring the Doctor?"

"Well...just..."

She can't put it into words. She's distracted by her own fear. I stand outside the stall as she pees on the stick. She comes out and we stand there anxiously awaiting the results.

"How long does it take?"

I look at the instructions on the box and answer her. "Ten minutes."

She bounces slightly in her inpatients. "Maybe this test doesn't work for time lords?"

I look at the stick. "Wait. Something's showing up."

We look at as the symbol appears. "What's that mean?" She grabs the box and compares. I feel a real smile spread on my face. She looks at me in shock.

"I'm pregnant," she says in a flat voice.

"You're pregnant," I confirm.

"I'm pregnant."

"Yeah. Yep. You are."

"I'm having a baby."

I nod excitedly, waiting for the other shoe to drop. And then she squeals and we hug and jump up and down. "I'm going to be a mum!"

Then she stops and I see terror enter her eyes. "I'm going to be a mum! And the Doctor's going to be a dad. Again. What am I going to tell him?"

I look at her incredulously. "That he's going to be a dad maybe?"

"No but...we've never talked about this. I don't know if this is something he wants."

She's beginning to panic a little so I sooth her as best I can and convince her that the sooner she tells him the better.

That night, while the rest of us are in the house, Rose talks with him outside. I'm the only one inside who knows, so when I hear the loud, "What?!" I don't jump as much as the others.

I wait a minute, a little worried but then I hear laughter. I peek out the window and I can see the Doctor swinging her around. They both look very happy. I steal Donna's phone from her and snap a quick picture of the moment.

When they come back in everyone starts demanding answers since I wouldn't give them any. The news is well received. Donna gets hyped up with fluttering hands and tips for Rose. Wilf pats the Doctor on the back and Lee offers his congratulations. Even Sylvia cracks a smile.

That night, I lay in bed looking at the ceiling and thinking. I do too much of that I think. But that doesn't stop me. I think about how this development would have changed things for the show. I don't think it would have gone well. It wouldn't have lasted anyway. Too much angst. But as far as living it, it makes me thrilled.

I have a feeling that the next nine months will be extremely hard for all of us. Especially them. I don't know how this will effect everything. But I guess it doesn't matter. I already changed everything else.

Rose is pregnant. I'm going to be an aunt. It puts my losses into perspective. I know Meta would want me to be part of it without reservation. I will always miss him, but wishing he was here won't do anything. So I resolve to put it behind me.

I resolve that this baby is going to have everything that their parents didn't. That I didn't. He or she will grow up with a family that's always there. They won't have to be in a situation that makes them choose between life and death for someone else. They will go through time without blood on their hands. And they will be the happiest child in the universe.

That is my new purpose. I helped Rose, and the Doctor, and Donna, and Lee. I helped Meta. Now I'll help the child. And I'm going to be the most badass aunt in history.

DW DW DW DW DW DW DW DW DW DW

Rose is just starting to show when we take a trip to old England. And by that, I mean England ruled by Queen Elizabeth the first. It's starts off with some sort of party with Rose and I dressed for the time period. The Doctor of course is not dressed in anything other than his customary suit and I curse him and his ability to avoid corsets.

But even though it started out innocent, I knew wouldn't end that way. Good Queen Bess right? I keep my journal close for the details of this. It's one of my favorites, and I'm looking forward to what changes are going to take place. And that's why I'm not surprised when the Doctor excitedly announces that there is some plot being instigated by Zigots.

However, I am surprised by another development. While at the party, before the Doctor sees anything amiss, we meet the queen. And the Doctor introduces his wife Rose and his sister Jane. But that isn't what surprises me. What does surprise me, is when the Queen winks at me as we walk away. At me.

I groan to myself. This is going to be interesting. The Doctor is otherwise a engaged with his pregnant wife. And the Queen was flirting with me. And as I recall, there was courting the Queen involved with the Doctor's plan. I revisit the urge to bang my head into a wall, repeatedly. This should prove to be interesting.

{A/N: this is not going to be a baby fic. It's like when Amy got pregnant. Except not. Please R&R. I'm curious about what you guy think and I love input. Encouragement a and constructive criticism. :)