Hey guys! Long time no see! Yeah, I'm sorry about that. I've been really busy irl lately. What, with my first year of college comin' up and planning my 18th b-day party. My birthday is on Monday by the way! I AM FINALLY AN ADULT. OR WILL BE IN SEVERAL DAYS. *throws confetti and glitter on you* BUAHAHA.
Anyway... thank you to all who sent in rules, I really really really appreciate it. I've just been exhausted lately. Did you know that if you wake up naturally and still remember your dream in detail, you didn't get much rest? Or is that me? Lately, I've been remembering my dreams and thus been really tired. I'll do my best to make this chapter funny.
REMEMBER TO SEND IN RULES, REQUESTS, AND VOTE ON THE POLL!
*insert standard disclaimer here*
236. The 'K-I-S-S-I-N-G' song is not to be sung at couples who are off duty.
(This does not mean you can sing it at couples who ARE on duty.)
(Especially when they are not actually a couple.)
(Sara and Red Alert are not a couple. As far as I know.)
(Neither are Ratchet and Ironhide.)
(*coughcoughOTPcough*)
(It seems I have come down with a summer cold. My apologies.)
237. Please refrain from checking your social media during meetings.
(Social media being Facebook, Twitter, etc.)
(I got caught browsing Tumblr.)
(One of the pics I was looking at was NSFW. Aka, not safe for work.)
(Galloway snatched my phone and looked at it, blushed as red as a firetruck, and showed everyone else, trying to embarass me.)
(Bitch, I don't give a fuck.)
238. Palm trees are not backscratchers and should not be used as such.
(Apparently, Cybertronians can get itchy too.)
(Someone, I won't say who, just that his designation rhymes with NIDS got a coconut stuck in his shoulder plates.)
(Don't ask me how, because not even Ratchet knows.)
(Ironhide has began to show off by taking a bunch of coconuts in his servos and crushing them for the kids.)
(I didn't say this, but it's really cute.)
239. Icebreaker Games should not be played by new recruits at parties.
(The Blanket Game is hard to do if it's an outside party because the bots usually stay in robot mode instead of holoform to get the recruits used to them.)
(Then there was that weird one where we picked a partner, walk around in circles, and touch body parts.)
(Yeah...)
240. If you decide to prank the decepticons, please refrain from painting them to look like Minions and dumping banana bunches on them.
(Megatron actually hailed us from the Nemesis to yell at us, he was so pissed.)
(Optimus had his mask up the entire time. He was shaking and tense. He looked so mad...)
(Once the call ended, he burst out laughing. He didn't stop for ten minutes.)
(Oh, he saw the streak of bright yellow behind Buckethead's left audial too?)
241 a. No putting Decepticon stickers on inanimate electronics or one of the few regular cars.
(The kitchens got blown up. AGAIN.)
(We got here two weeks ago! GAH.)
(Luckily, the government thought ahead for once and gave us more than one.)
(We are so luck Galloway has insurance.)
(*sigh*)
241 b. No putting Decepticon stickers over a recharging bot's Autobot symbol.
(So)
(Many)
(Screams.)
242. No stuffing fireworks into a bot's cannons, even if you have their permission.
(Apparently, all this does is have them blow up in said bot's face.)
(Sunstreaker is now very... displeased... with Fig and Epps.)
(They have recently decided to take their two weeks of leave now.)
(What morons.)
(Sunny won't be over it in two weeks.)
243. It is actually considered cheating to shoot at other players when playing life sized chess in the HQ parking lot.
(This is a surprisingly popular pass time on base.)
(But, as you probably know, many of the bots are competitive. Extremely.)
(Ironhide shoots practice rounds at 'pawns.' Which are usually humans.)
(Please note that practice rounds for Ironhide are the cybertronian eaquivalent to human grenades.)
(He is no longer allowed to participate.)
244. Just because you're a mad scientist does not mean you can recruit base kids to be your minions.
(I'm lookin' at you Shockwave.)
(Y'all's experiments are way too dangerous for the kids to be around.)
(And that don't mean you can recruit soldiers either!)
245. Please refrain from running around base, screaming your head off.
(Sara, you are so mean.)
(You had ol' Red Alert worried.)
(Not to mention that some bots are still complaining of ringing audials.)
(But congrats Sar! You've recieved your very first Psyche Evaluation! You will now begin to have many more.)
(Welcome to N.E.S.T. sweetie!)
246. Stop uploading yourselve onto video games so you can cheat.
(Soundwave, you can be a real ass, ya know that?)
(How am I supposed to even have a chance at winning against you if you cheat?)
(It's bad enough when Prowl and I play a game, what with his stupid advanced tactical processor.)
(Of course, seeing as we hate eachother and the only thing to make us work together is our mutal hatred for Galloway, we don't tend to spend all that much time together.)
247. Don't make fun of Ironhide for being the base kids' "tooth fairy."
(He gets enough crap for it as is.)
(Besides, it's sweet.)
(Whenever a kid looses a tooth, they tell Ratchet. Who tells Ironhide.)
(That night, with the permission of the parents, he sneaks in wearing a bright blue suit, fairy wings, and a tiara, then leaves them a hershey's kiss and a dollar.)
(We tried to convincing him to wear a tutu but he took out his cannons.)
(He'd look stupid in a tutu anyway. *laughs nervously*)
248. You are not the Avatar, nor are you a bender.
(So stop trying to convince Jolt you can redirect his lightning attacks!)
(I swear, if I smell burning flesh one more time, I will have a conniption.)
(Also, you're teaching the base kids it's okay to throw rocks at people.)
(Which it is not.)
249. Please look where you are sitting.
(Ironhide, I know you are not that stupid. You knew exactly who's car you were sitting on.)
(Prowl sat on a box of land mines and blew his aft right off a few days ago!)
(It was glorious.)
(It was even funnier when we found it later that day.)
(Bob was chewing on it.)
250. If your spouse dies in combat, please don't just leave and give your children up for adoption.
(Especially when you find out they have a birth defect.)
(A woman on base lost her husband while she was still pregnant with their son. When she found out he would be born with a severe club foot on his left side, she decided she didn't want him anymore. The woman decided to give him up for adoption.)
(I don't understand why. It's a usually easy enough thing to fix, especially in newborns. Then again, when Kira was still up for adoption, no one wanted her because she's technically missing an arm and a leg, even if she has technorganic prosthetics.)
(I decided to adopt him. Ratchet is gonna see what he can do about his foot.)
(That damn woman didn't even name him. She was gone off this base the second Ratchet and the human medics said she could leave.)
(Brandon Elijah Woodward is going to be the most over protected little boy this world has ever seen, what with four older brothers and an autobot lieutenant for a father, not to mention all his crazy aunts and uncles.)
(Elijah was Magnus' idea for a middle name because he's sort of the dad now.)
Yay! New chapter is finally out! Kathy and Magnus have a son now. Yup. I just did that. Please remember to review and vote on the poll!