Hey guys, long time no see! I have an explanation, I swear. So I had about half of this chapter all typed ou and pretty, then my computer decided it didn't like me anymore and TURNED OFF because it was OVERHEATING. So I turned on my desk fan, let it sit there for a few moments, but by then I wasn't in the mood to write. I wasn't for a few days actually. Now I have to try and remember what my original author's note said... ALSO, THIS IS THE LAST CHAPTER TO VOTE ON THE POLL! THE NEXT ONE WILL BE KATHY'S BACKSTORY, SO GO VOTE NOW! AS MY DAD ALWAYS SAYS, IF YOU DIDN'T VOTE, YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO COMPLAIN!
Oh yeah! THANK YOU GUYS SO MUCH! WE GOT OVER 100 REVIEWS LAST CHAPTER! Seriously, thank you. I know I tell you every chapter that if it wasn't for you guys, this story would have died a long time ago, but that's because it's ture. It's really hard to stop updating if I look at my traffic and how many people are following this story. Again, thank you guys. I know I have issues with updating because of my depression and my adhd, I start college next Monday, so it'll be even farther in between updates, but I WILL ALWAYS UPDATE THIS STORY, just be patient please.
The reactions to last chapter were great by the way! I was honestly afraid someone would be angry. But you guys have to remember, while for us it's only been a few months, for them it's been at least a year, maybe even two. I don't know myself. I write this as I go, if I'm honest. Who here is excited for the wedding? I'm thinking of bringing in some of Kathy's relatives, maybe even a few old friends of hers.
REVIEWER QUESTION: What kind of dress do you see Kathy wearing on the big day? Vintage with lots of lace and frills? Ball gown? Modern mermaid, or even a Tea Dress? Tell me what you think in a review!
*insert standard disclaimer here*
266. Don't ask people about their favorite colors.
(Sunstreaker's, big surprise, is yellow. Specifically, the color of Bran's hair.)
(Sideswipe actually told me that his favorite color used to be red, and it still is, but he says he love the color of my hair.)
(My boys are so precious!)
(My favorite is the color of Magnus' optics. I could look at them for hours. I have, actually.)
(Also, I have no idea why this is a rule. Prowl made me do it. *rolls eyes*)
267. Don't record the weird things people say in their sleep.
('Don't leave the duck there. It's totally irresponsible. Put it on the swing, it'll have much more fun.'-Megatron. According to the various cons on base, he talks a lot in his sleep. And has a thing for rubber ducks... For some reason.)
('I'm totally gonna fuck the carpe out of this diem.'-Ironhide, according to Ratchet. They were in a meeting with Optimus and Ironhide fell into recharge and started talking. All we have to say is 'Carpe diem' and Ol' Hide goes into a snit.)
('Stop it Boss. STOP IT, BOSS! Go away. Shhh... Go to Mommy... GET OFF... I will fucking skin you alive and wear you like a slipper.'-Ultra Magnus. I woke up before the alarm and decided to wake up Magnus a little early. But I wanted to be nice about it, so I started petting him with the blanket. He thought it was Boss licking him. He is not coherent when he's just waking up. Boss wasn't even in the room. He's taken to guarding Bran's crib.))
('You got an issue with my goat, you got an issue with me. Come on, goat. We're going somewhere where we're welcome. Baaaaah.' Is it any surprise this is Miles? He's been complaining about wanting a pet goat for a few weeks now. Barricade can barely tolerate Mason the Mastiff, let alone a goat.)
(Don't tell Barricade or Prowl, but I've been thinking of getting a few for the front of HQ. We're always so busy, no one has time to mow.)
('Do re mi... fucking so la ti do, asshole.' Magnus again! He says the darnest things while in recharge, I swear. It's great. We both listen to the recording every morning and it always puts us in a great mood.)
('Your voice has that haunting melody of whale song… without pitch or tone. Painful. Fucking painful.'-Rumble. Just like his dad apparently.)
('Correctomundo! Take the frame and shit on it, stick it on the wall and stare at it with pride. Cause that's the best thing you're ever going to do.'- Sunstreaker. Ah the pleasures of having an artist in the family.)
('Primus, I can read your mind. I see blank pages, more blank pages— oh, cute kitty! Oh, lovely little kitty— more blank pages... Primus, you're so vacant.'-Soundwave. Who would have though Soundwave would talk in his sleep?)
('Seriously. I'm just gonna have to call you anus breath from now on.'-Bumblebee! He can be a vulgar little shit sometimes, even in his sleep. Barricade won't stop making fun of him!)
268. No leaving crayons in the hot sun.
(I used to do this as a kid. Basically, all you do is take a crayon, without the wrapper, and leave it in the hot sun for a few hours. Come back, there is now a puddle of wax to play with.)
(This is the Chevy Twins' fault. They took some of Bran's big crayons and left them on the back porch, then FORGOT ABOUT THEM.)
(Sunstreaker and Sideswipe like to go through the backdoor because it's the closest to the garage. They didn't notice the puddles of wax.)
(Most of the house has carpet flooring.)
(WHITE carpet.)
(I am not pleased.)
269. No one is allowed to watch South Park while on Duty.
(Especially during the day when any random kid can wander through the security office.)
(Besides, those monitors are for the cameras! Not for cable television!)
270. Do not parkour all across base. That goes for both humans and Cybertronians.
(Too much chaos. We have military discipline: Use it.)
(Who am I kidding? A class of grade 1 kids has more discipline than NEST on your average day.)
(But that's why I love it here.)
271. Even if you are drilling the recruits, no swearing in front of the base kids.
(Those kids see enough shit already, we don't need to be influencing their vocabularies too.)
(Ironhide, Epps.)
(They both get a thrill from drawing inspiration from Full Metal Jacket. It's Ironhide's favorite movie.)
(Sadistic bastards.)
272. No treating equally experienced reassigned officers like recruits.
(Like many things here at NEST, you'd think this wouldn't need to be said.)
(You would be wrong of course.)
(So Sergeant Sexism has been at it again. Big surprise.)
(We just got in a whole squad of medics from the Army, which we are thankful for. We're expanding the medbay and putting in a room full of berths so Bot's can have a place to rest, along with a surgery for both humans and Cybertronians.)
(Ratchet's been having to work out of a tent if someone needs any serious repairs. Which is often, because Science Bots.)
(Sergeant Sexism has been treating the new medics like shit, because most of them are girls. They either let him 'flirt' with them or they get sent to Ironhide and Robert for 'P.T.' Which is bullshit, because they're not in charge of regular P.T, Will is. They're in charge of Boot Camp and Battle Training.)
(Unfortunately, it took us a few weeks until we realized what was going on. And we only realized it because it was right after a battle and half of the medics passed out from exhaustion while doing triage.)
(They had been pulling full shift, even multiple ones, all the while doing intensive physical training.)
(They thought we knew and just didn't care.)
(All of the officers are going to be getting together to have a 'talk' with Sergeant Sexism. If I have any say in the matter, NEST will be down an officer soon.)
(Good fucking riddance.)
273. Just because you have blanks and practice weapons doesn't mean you can pretend to fight each other or pretend to be under attack when outside the simulation room.
(You know, I think I've covered this before.)
(It's one thing to spar in the training room and another to do it out in the PARKING LOT!)
(Seekers can do it because a lot of their fights happen in the air, but they have a controlled airspace with no buildings nearby.)
(Grounders do not.)
(That is what the training room and training areas are for.)
(And pretending that the base in under attack is not good for morale.)
(And everyone has heard the story of the Boy who cried Wolf. Even the bots have a version.)
274. Do not quote Full Metal Jacket.
(Someone accused Ironhide of being rascist for some reason. So he got in there face and screamed, "THERE IS NO RACIAL BIGOTRY HERE! HERE, YOU ARE ALL WORTHLESS!")
(Sunstreaker to some random person in town when he overheard them complaining about how he can never get a girl. "You're so ugly, you're a modern art masterpiece!")
(It was not a compliment. Sunny got in a fight.)
(Again.)
275. This is the third time I have said this, and I will say it again. NO MORE CALVIN AND HOBBES QUOTES.
("I think night time is dark so you can imagune your fears with less distraction." Me when asked my opinion on why kids are afraid of the dark.)
("Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that of it has tried to contact us." Miles in the middle of the rec room while a bunch bots in holoforms were in there. They all stopped what they were doing and glared at him.)
(I could see that smug little grin from across the room. Even Bumblebee glared at him.)
("Bad news Dad. You're polls are way down." "My polls?" "You rate especially low among insecticons and yellow lamborghinis." "Get out of my office Sunstreaker.")
("Wow, look at the grass stains on my skin. I say, if your knees aren't green by the end of the day, you ought to seriously re-examine your life." Me after working in my garden.)
("You can present the material, but you can't make me care." Simmons during a meeting with Galloway.)
276. An order to shine your commanding officer's boots does not mean put the container on the boot.
(Don't just shine one part of the boots either.)
(You can't shine one boot and leave the other.)
(Just do it. It doesn't take long.)
277. I am not allowed to speak more than a few words at military ceremonies.
(Those words may not be 'Roomper Bomper Stomper Boo.')
(Neither can it be 'CONSTANT VIGILANCE!')
278. Don't use holographic projector to make pokemon look real.
(How the hell am I supposed to explain to Galloway that he saw Rayquaza?)
(But Magnus did project a couple of my favorite pokemon for me. I would totally be a Dark Type Specialist. But I'd keep a Magikarp too.)
(I've always wanted a Gyarados. They're badass.)
279. Don't mark minefields with a smiley face.
(That doesn't mean you mark it with a frowny face.)
(Or a cartoon bomb.)
(Or a mushroom cloud.)
280. No alcohol IVs.
(Apparently, it gets you drunker.)
(As I have said, Ratchet does not enjoy pumping stomachs.)
(So DON'T DO IT!)
Man, that took forever to do. Sorry about all the quotes. I wasn't a creative person today. But at least I got it done! Remember to vote on the poll and send in rules! REVIEWER QUESTION as well!