RATING: PG
CATEGORY: Challenge - Annie Greer Saga
MAJOR CHARACTERS: Ezra and OFC - Annie Greer
DISCLAIMERS: This is fanfiction. No profit involved. This story is based on the television series "The Magnificent Seven". No infringement upon the copyrights held by CBS, MGM, TNN, The Hallmark Station, Trilogy Entertainment Group, The Mirisch Corp. or any others involved with that production is intended.
NOTE: September 2003 Challenge, offered by Setcheti: Write a story that somehow involves one of the guys with a teddy bear or other stuffed toy of your choosing. The toy does not have to be the focus of the story, but it should have at least some significance. Any AU is acceptable.
SUMMARY: Another Annie Greer story, with Annie contemplating purchasing a little something for young Ezra.

AWARDS: 2006 Mistresses Of Malarkey "Best Gen Series" Award and 'Perfect' Award
DATE: Originally Posted September 07, 2003

The Annie Greer Saga – Part 3

Ephemeral
By NotTasha.

Annie Greer moved through the cramped aisles of Emma Chan's store. Her hand touched the strange and exotic things. She breathed in the rare odors, half-disgusted by them, half-entranced. The store smelled of earth, it smelled of animals, flowers, spice and perfume and faraway places.

Outside, it was a warm June day in a quiet town. Inside the store, was the wealth of the world – little figures from India, tins of tea from Japan, tiny bottles of French perfume, German wind-up toys, South American pottery, unidentifiable dried bits of roots, vegetables, animals and sea life, spices and herbs from all corners of the globe. Stone figures next to paper fans – things that would last forever, sharing shelf space with ephemeral distractions. She lingered, carefully maneuvering her basket through the narrow aisle, exploring.

Annie, already finished with her daily shopping, was taking a trip around the globe. Mrs. Greer liked this part of her day – enjoyed the time she spent within the cramped store. Her heart beat a little faster as her eyes lit upon the eclectic mix of goods. She felt like a world traveler, an explorer, an adventuress, capable of anything.

She used to have her groceries delivered to her home. Now, she regretted that she'd wasted so many days without this little adventure.

She smiled, picturing herself in traveling togs, traveling by ship to faraway places, jostling her way through crowded bazaars, exploring ancient ruins, swinging a machete through a jungle path – unbothered by the snakes that draped just over her head.

Oh dear, Annie Greer, what are you thinking? She giggled and covered her mouth.

"You found something funny?" Mrs. Chan asked, as she puttered about behind the counter. Her eyes sparkled, ready to find the humor in Annie's discovery. "I have many funny things."

"Oh, Emma," Mrs. Greer sighed, "I'm just being so silly, thinking about where all of this must have come from. How do you do it? How do you find so many interesting things to sell?"

"Easy," the older woman said with a warm smile and her lovely accent. "Boston, New York, Baltimore - everything comes in ships. You will go to those places someday. You will see." She gestured to the stuffed shelves. "Much more. You will go far."

Annie's hand touched a red stone horse from China, knowing that this store would be the extent of her travels. Here was a little boat, woven from reeds from Lake Titicaca. Next, she spotted a series of folded-paper cranes hanging from the ceiling, created from colorful paper and strung together. They could fly no further than Annie. She was a homebody, a local girl, a timid waif.

Emma, of course, had lived a much more exciting life than Annie could imagine. She'd been born in Pittsburgh, but spent most of her life submerged in the culture of the Chinese people, living almost as if she'd been born in that distant land. Oh, the stories she told about her childhood! Annie could hardly fathom that exotic life. Emma had married young and traveled all over the country, to the Orient and back with her adventurous husband. Then, they settled here, in this harmless little town.

Even young Ezra had traveled more than Annie Greer. The boy's tales revealed a bewildering list of temporary homes. From east to west, north to south, the boy had seen much of this expanding country. Already, in his nine short years, he'd seen more than she ever would.

Ezra, she thought lovingly of the boy who shared her house – her pretend son - her temporary child. There was something so dear about him. She just wanted to gather him into her arms and keep him forever. But, she knew that couldn't happen. She knew that he'd stay only as long as Maude allowed. The boy's mother would return someday and take him away. Her expression lengthened at that sad thought. That day would come too early, she realized.

Even now, she couldn't bear the thought of losing the boy. What would she do when he left? What sort of life would he be thrust into – without her? How would he feel – without her? Would he miss her once he was gone? Would he remember?

As Annie glanced about the chock-a-block store, a thought struck her. She'd get something for Ezra. She smiled as she came up with this plan. Yes, find a small gift for him. Something he could keep, that he might be able to take with him as a memory of her. He needed something that would last.

He asked for nothing and he thought of himself as a burden. She'd yet to break him out of the resolution. Maybe a little present would help. A gift would show him that he was 'wanted'. He was usually so bright and happy but he'd seemed glum lately. He needed something to cheer him.

A little bin of marbles caught her eye and she drove her hand into the glass globs, marveling at how good the cool glass felt in her hand. Ezra liked marbles, didn't he?

There were few children on their street; mostly old men and women inhabited the stately lane. Of the few children along that route, most were older or younger than the nine-year-old, so Ezra had found few playmates. He seemed content to spend his days in reading, learning the piano, helping her at whatever caught her fancy, playing cards with the officers at the police station or exploring the town. Recently, he had taken up marbles, joining the older boys up on Post Street.

Ezra had a tin can that he kept under his bed. One day, the can might brim and the next day it would appear nearly empty, but usually it stayed half-filled. Ezra Severt would carry the can from the house, giving his "Auntie" a grin and a 'goodbye', to spend a few hours in play with some of the local boys. She had no idea where he'd gained the glass balls that started his collection, but he'd been able to make it grow rather quickly.

Whether he won or lost, he'd come home with a self-satisfied look and return the can to its hiding place, beside the box of matchsticks that he used as markers when he played poker with the officers.

Still, he didn't covet his marbles like other boys. She'd seen boys talking excitedly about their latest acquisitions, clutching their prizes, rolling their best marbles in their hands, picking through this bin with trembling hands. Ezra hardly touched his. He seemed to regard them, like his matchsticks, as little more than 'markers' and an excuse to gamble.

If she were to purchase some marbles for him – well, they'd go in the can with the others and disappear as Ezra continued the game. No, not marbles. There had to be something else he'd enjoy.

She moved down the aisle, her eyes searching for something special, something Ezra might like. There was a knife with a beautiful handle, a small bible bound in leather, a lead soldier with his clothing all blackened, a toy sheriff's badge, a harmonica, a mustache comb. She moved past them, not knowing what the boy would like.

He had been living with her for three months. She should know what he liked! He liked card games. He enjoyed playing the piano. He liked to read. She glanced to the crowded shelves in Emma's book section, and didn't know what to get. The boy was quickly working his way through her library and seemed to want nothing outside of it. There was still plenty of books at home to peruse so it seemed silly to buy one more. Besides, a book is quickly finished, and paper is so easily damaged. She wanted something more permanent.

What then? She moved through the store, searching. Emma, noting a change in Annie's behavior, asked, "Annie, are you looking for something?"

"Oh, I'm not sure," Annie said softly as she stepped along one side of the store. Certainly, there would be something here the boy would like – but what?

I must find something he could keep, she thought. Something small enough to fit in that carpetbag. Something that would be soft in his hands. Something he could hold when he was lonely – for she had seen that loneliness in his eyes. She needed to find a gift to assuage that aloneness, if only for a little while when he was away from her.

She paused when something glinted at her – a flash of light on the tiniest piece of glass. She looked closer to find something peeping out from a dark corner of a shelf. She moved a jointed nutcracker, a boxed cuckoo clock, and a clever candle-powered windmill to stare into the glass eyes of a small black bear.

She pulled out the little creature. It stood on all fours -its back humped, its head down. It seemed to be a fierce little creature, strong and resilient. Annie settled it on the palm of one hand and turned it with the other. It was a beautiful little animal, tightly sewed and stuffed with sawdust. Little claws had been stitched on its paws to attest to its might. Its 'fur' was impressively short and bristled under her fingers. Its little triangle nose was carefully stitched at the end of its muzzle. Its glass eyes had an intensity to them, as if the toy was staring down some other creature, but its mouth had a funny crook. It was a mistake, no doubt, but it looked as if the little bear was amused by something, smiling at some secret joke.

Annie smiled back.

"Do you like it?" Emma asked as she shuffled out from behind her counter.

"I do," Annie whispered in reply, as if a louder voice might startle the wild beast. "I just wonder if Ezra would like it."

"Ezra!" Emma beamed at the mention of the boy. "Such a good boy." She cocked her head, adding. "Naughty sometimes, but not bad." When Annie gave her a quizzical look, the woman explained, "Those Campbell boys came in here one day. They were making mess." She waved her hands about in demonstration. "Ezra, he came rushing in and told them that their daddy was calling - calling loud, angry! They left in big hurry. Ezra told me he lied about Mr. Campbell." She smiled. "He naughty, but not bad. He helped me fix things right." She plucked the animal from Annie's hand. "It's a nice bear. I will make it better."

Annie followed as Emma hurried back to her counter and then disappeared behind it.

"Do you think Ezra will like it?" Annie asked. "He's so grown up. Maybe it's not a good toy."

"He's a little boy," Emma declared as she pulled a clothing brush from a drawer and brushed the dusty bear. "Little boys like toys."

"I don't know," Annie said, screwing up a frown. "Maybe I should get him a book."

Emma kept brushing, bringing a shine to the bear's pelt. "He will like this bear."

"He's like a little man," Annie continued. "Sometimes, it's as if he's not a boy at all. I think I should get him something more adult." She turned to further peruse the shelves.

"Ezra is a boy!" Emma insisted. "He should be treated like a boy." As she spoke, she dipped into her notions drawer and pulled out a spool of ribbon. "My Lydia, she grew so fast. One day, she was a little girl with ribbons in her hair. Always playing with her dolly. Next day, a woman." She cut off a length and quickly tied the ribbon around the bear's neck, fixing it under its chin like a bow tie instead of at the back of its head. "A child should be a child. They are only young for so long. Too short a time." She smiled at the result. The bear had a sophisticated look. "He will like it."

"I don't know," Annie continued, as Emma Chan nestled the little bear into her basket and totaled her purchases.

"He will like it," Emma reiterated with a wink.

[(*)][(*)][(*)][(*)]

Annie Greer unpacked her purchases for the day, and settled them in their proper places. Only the little black bear had no place to go. She set him on the table, wondering how she'd present it to the grown-up boy. She didn't know how he'd take the little bruin with the jaunty expression. He'd either laugh at it and make the gift a joke or maybe be annoyed by it, thinking it was just a silly child's toy.

She contemplated putting it away, but before she could move, there was a creak of the door and a voice called out, "Auntie Annie, I'm home." Ezra walked in through the front door and smiled at her. His eyes had that distant look to them again and he held his hands behind his back as he came toward her. His gaze flashed to the bear on the table, but he lingered for only a moment on it before he approached her.

"Did anything come in the mail?" he asked tentatively.

With a sigh, Anne told him, "No, I'm sorry, Ezra. Mr. Ryder didn't have anything for you."

If he was disappointed, Ezra didn't show it. "Did you enjoy shopping?" he asked pleasantly.

"Yes, I had a very nice chat with Mrs. Chan," Annie returned. "And where have you been all day?"

Ezra paused a moment, as if to come up with a story, but seemed to discard that idea as he responded, "I was at the train station."

"All day?" Annie asked, concern tingeing her voice.

"I thought, perhaps, there might be an important shipment today." Realizing that he'd said something odd, Ezra stopped. To change the topic, he stated, "There's a bear on your table."

Annie gestured the boy to the table and they sat down side-by-side. The bear looked back at him with its glass eyes. "I bought it for you," she said timidly. "You can do whatever you want with it. You don't have to like it if you don't want to."

Ezra stared at the sawdust-stuffed animal somberly. He touched it, feeling the short fur. He ran one finger over the top of its tan muzzle, as if carefully patting it. "It's very nice," he stated, withdrawing the finger. "What's it for?"

"It's for you to play with… if you like," Annie explained, feeling stupid.

Ezra colored, embarrassed, and stated, "I meant to say, 'why did you purchase it?'"

Annie shrugged nervously. "It's just a little gift. A little gift for you." She continued in a rush, watching as the boy gently touched the red ribbon. "I saw it at Mrs. Chan's. It's silly, I know, but I thought you might like it. I wanted to get something special for you - just for you."

The boy drew his hands into his lap, cocked his head and gazed back at the widow. "How did you know?" he asked solemnly.

"Know? Know what, Ezra?"

Ezra clenched his hands together in his lap and whispered, "How did you know it was my birthday today?"

Annie sighed, realizing the reason for Ezra's sullen mood, understanding immediately why the boy had spent the day at the train station, knowing that he had spent hours there, hoping for something, someone. Oh Maude, she thought, how can you treat him like this? No letter, no gift, no message at all? He'd waited all day for nothing.

She stated softly, "I just wanted to get you something today because you're very special to me. Because I like you."

The child smiled at her, then reached one hand out again to scratch the little nose. "Can I keep it?" he asked softly.

"Yes. Yes, of course," Annie replied, keeping the surprise from her voice.

"Forever?" Ezra asked, tilting his head to meet her eyes.

Annie paused, wondering about the boy. She knew so little about his past, but she figured he rarely had anything that was his-very-own. He arrived with only a carpetbag of clothing. He must have lost so many things, she thought. He has no concept of 'forever'. Everything in his life has been 'temporary'. He can't even count on his mother to be there for him.

She nodded tightly. "You can keep it as long as you like - forever."

He continued to pet it – patiently, carefully, solemnly – on its little tan muzzle. "Thank you," he whispered.

Annie Greer watched as Ezra Severt caressed the little toy and she wondered how to teach the boy about forever.

[(*)][(*)][(*)][(*)]

Ezra Standish, gambler extraordinaire and lawman from Four Corners, ambled happily down the stuffed aisles of the Import Shop. He had lost Buck and the others somewhere in the strange town. They were probably at one of the saloons, the restaurant, bathhouse or whorehouse. It didn't matter to Standish. When Ezra had spotted the sign outside of "Mrs. Lee's Market", he couldn't resist taking a stroll through the bursting store.

He breathed in deeply, smelling those same exotic scents, flooding his mind with recollections of Mrs. Chan's, remembering the days spent within those walls, helping her unpack the marvels that arrived from around the world, stocking shelves, sweeping, talking, keeping an eye on those Campbell boys.

And he remembered Aunt Annie. He smiled, relishing the memories. Aunt Annie, dear Auntie Annie.

Mrs. Lee sat behind the counter looking like Mrs. Chan. She watched him with amused eyes as he regarded the overstuffed shelves – filled with anything and everything. "You looking for something special?" Mrs. Lee asked. "You need help to find?"

"No, no," Ezra assured as he moved through the memories, "I am quite content to browse your wares. It's a little like traveling the world."

"Yes, yes," Mrs. Lee said, grinning widely. "We have everything, everything you want."

Yes, yes indeed, Ezra thought as he moved slowly, taking it all in – finding familiar objects everywhere. The red stone horse, the paper fans – reed boats - heavy permanent figures side-by-side with things that could not last. All of it drew him back to that happy time in his life.

He came to a sudden halt as something caught his eye. Something glinted, as if the light was caught by a tiny piece of glass. Taking a moment to push aside a tiny Bavarian cottage, a green hinged box and a crystal bowl, he revealed a little black bear with a humped back.

He pulled it out and marveled at the sawdust-stuffed animal. It looked so much like his "Horatio", the bear he had owned as a child. He turned it over slowly, noting the same careful stitching, the intense glass eyes, and the crooked smile that made the bear look like he was contemplating doing something naughty.

His bear started off with a ribbon around his neck, but that was quickly lost, and his bristly hair had become threadbare in time. He had lost one eye and spilled sawdust through split seams that were eternally being re-sewed. His stiff little legs had stopped supporting him, but his quirky little smile always remained – always laughing at some secret thing.

Ezra held the new bear carefully, staring back at its perplexing expression – solemn eyes and a laughing mouth.

He'd loved his little bear, had kept it safe and perfect at his bedside while he'd lived in Auntie Annie's house. Later, once they'd parted ways, the bear had become mashed down when he slept with it. Its pretty little face had become disfigured, its muzzle bent from his perpetual petting. Horatio's fur wore away from being clutched tightly on those bad days after he'd left Annie's care, had become matted and ruined by being held close to his face.

Horatio became a dirty, mangled bear that he was too old for (Maude told him so much). Then one day, when they moved by train from south to north, he'd discovered the bear was gone.

Maude had been indifferent at his distress. "You're too old for such silly things, darling son," she had said. "It really was an awful old thing. Now, be mother's little man and get ready. I don't have time for your childish sullenness."

And he got over it.

But he'd loved that bear. Annie had told him that the bear was his forever – yet he'd had it for little more than a year before it had been lost. The memory lasted though.

Ezra smiled as he held this new bear. Carefully he ran one finger over its tan muzzle, petting it gently as he had once caressed his Horatio.

Forever, he realized, is a very long time and stuffed toys are ephemeral things – bound to be loved-up by little children – bound to be worn down and eventually left behind.

As he gazed at the little bear, he thought of his Aunt Annie and smiled gratefully at the memory of the gentle woman who'd taken the time to love him. He'd never forget her – the memory of the woman would be with him always – through everything - forever.

"You like the bear?" Mrs. Lee called from behind counter.

"Yes, very much," Ezra said, still cradling the creature. He could purchase it, he realized, but then what?

"There is child somewhere? A child somewhere who would like it?"

"Yes," Ezra said softly, "Somewhere…" He set the bear down at the front of the shelf so that it would have a better chance at being found, so that they could eventually love the stuffing out of it.

Someone might be lonely. Someone might need a soft and stalwart companion.

He smiled at the kind old lady, tipped his hat, and went on his way.